Chapter Text
Pathetic.
As Alastor watched Charlie and her little friends tidy up the hotel for the grand reopening, that was the only word he could think of to describe…
Himself.
He brushed his claws against his coat, over the stupid fucking scar. A reminder of his fight with Adam. A fight that left him looking weak and humiliated.
Alastor spotted his Royal Highness Lucifer flying around the lobby and cleaning up any debris the others missed, smiling and laughing along the way.
It infuriated the Radio Demon how a tiny silly duck-obsessed buffoon defeated an archangel so fucking easily while he himself barely left a scratch.
Alastor would not have cared too much, considering who he was comparing himself with - the strongest non-sinner in Hell, however, the difference in their power was quite literally painfully obvious and he had a reputation to build back up again after all those years Rosie made him go into hiding.
He could see the headline now!
The Radio Demon - showing up to help the goodie two-shoes Princess of Hell open up a hotel, band together with her friends against Heaven and heroically hold off the First Man long enough for Lucifer to save the day?
Oh no no no no, that simply won’t do!
It was time to rectify a few things.
Alastor kept his grin wide as he looked down at everyone from where he was on the second floor, observing how close this group of losers and misfits had become. It surprised him how even grumpy kitty cat Husk had formed quite the bond with the gang.
Alastor knew that if he had any hope of even beginning his brand new scheme, he’d have to find a suitable replacement to watch over the hotel and its inhabitants in his stead, to keep Rosie placated and off his tail.
But who in hell would want to babysit and play nice with this group while also having the king himself breathing down their neck?
Alastor growled tiredly. It wasn’t exactly the most sterling job opportunity.
One would have to be an absolute desperate fool to-
Oh.
The Radio Demon’s shadow stretched towards the glass ceiling, as if pointing towards the gaudy neon lights that sat atop V Tower.
Alastor grinned mischievously. “I’m almost disappointed to miss out on all the fun.”
If there was one thing Alastor could count on Vox for, it was that the man always showed up when he called for him.
Deliciously ironic how he was just as loyal as Nifty and Husk were in that regard. Only, his fellow hotel associates didn’t really have a choice in the matter, while Vox was doing it voluntarily, ha!
Alastor stood just at the border of the Vees’s territory, where buildings were bathed in a variety of bright neon colors.
He had his hands clasped behind his back and an easy smile on his face when Vox zapped right in front of him, popping in so they were just inches apart from each other, the Media Overlord’s screen a bit too close for comfort.
Vox never was any good with the concept of personal space.
The tv demon made a show of rolling his shoulders and standing up straight. Alastor had to stop himself from groaning.
He just needed to be a good boy for a few minutes. Why, he was able to last far much longer in the hotel!
Vox crossed his arms. “What is it, old man?” Then he grinned and added, “Thought you’d still be licking your wounds after your last fight. That was pure cinema, by the way. Even got a 4K image of Adam slashing you hanging on my bedroom wall.”
As much as he wanted to trade jabs with Vox, he knew he had just a bit of time before the TV would short circuit with annoyance or the two other Vees came running after him.
Alastor hummed playfully. “Actually, speaking of that charming piece of décor of yours, that brings me to why I called you out here. I have a proposition for you.”
Alastor didn’t miss the way Vox’s shoulders tensed just a fraction and how his eyes widened before static quickly wiped the surprise from his face and his expression shifted to one of suspicion.
The Media Overlord raised one eyebrow and Alastor took that as his cue to continue.
The Radio Demon twirled his staff. “Seeing as our high and mighty King Lucifer and dear Princess Charlie decided to leave Adam alive, who is to say the exorcists won’t be back soon bringing more firepower?”
Vox cackled. “Uhhh literally everyone knows that’s what’s coming. Sure, you killed an angel or two, but you guys really fucked up with the big boss. Well, you specifically actually. I mean, come on, Alastor, even the fucking maid was able to slash at his leg before they ran off.”
Ah yes.
Alastor was quite proud when he heard Nifty was able to do a bit of damage herself.
He planted his staff right in the middle between him and Vox. “Right you are, old friend! Indeed, not one of my finer moments.” His grin turned into a sly smirk. “Now, I want you to think very carefully. Why is it that darling little Nifty succeeded where I could not? Hmmm?”
Vox sighed impatiently. “How the fuck should I know? Maybe you just aren’t as good as you think you-”
“Indulge me, Vox. For old times’ sake,” Alastor interrupted, smiling as sweetly as he could, but his fangs on full display as if entertaining himself with his prey before going in for the kill.
Vox rolled his eyes, but Alastor knew the gears - or processor or whatever computer doo-hickey component he had - were turning in the Media Overlord’s head.
Then those same eyes widened slowly.
“Un-fucking-believable,” Vox said, almost in a whisper. “You really thought you were powerful enough to take on Adam, the fucking First Man, without those angel weapons?! Which, ya know, your whole group prepared specifically to fight with, by the way.”
From out of Vox’s line of sight, Alastor’s shadow grinned menacingly.
Just a bit more.
Alastor shrugged nonchalantly. “Oh you know me! Even I can get caught up in the moment from time to time. But! Imagine what you could do if you come prepared.” He leaned towards Vox, the sound of radio static almost overpowering his own voice as he added, “Imagine achieving what I could not.”
That was when Alastor saw it. It was brief, but he saw it in Vox’s mismatched eyes.
The little Vincent from seventy years ago, desperate to prove himself.
Almost there.
“What exactly are you offering?” Vox said, guarded, but curious. Hopeful.
Alastor moved back, standing straight once more. “You take care of the hotel in my stead, and you won’t see me or hear from me. You get the spotlight all to yourself again! And all under one teeny tiny itsy bitsy condition.” He sing-songed the last part.
Ha! Vox probably wasn’t even aware that he was leaning closer. “Which is?” The tv demon asked.
Alastor’s pupils turned into radio dials and, without moving his smile, he said, “You are not to let any angel harm Charlie Morningstar.”
Morphing back to normal, Alastor added, “You’ll have time to prepare, weapons at your disposal, plus, even the King of Hell as back-up! Lucifer won’t let anyone hurt his beloved daughter. I mean, really, all you have to do, Vox, is deliver the final blow.”
Alastor extended his hand towards the Media Overlord, his claws stretching out, his shadow waiting eagerly beside him.
Vox looked at Alastor’s hand then glanced back up, their eyes meeting.
Vox chuckled lightly. “Am I gonna have to live in that dump?”
Alastor’s shadow grinned.
Just like that, he had already won.
The Radio Demon shrugged. “As long as you do your hotel duties, I don’t see why I should impose that on you.”
With wide-eyes and a bright grin, Vox shook Alastor’s hand.
“Deal.”
Alastor’s shadow cackled silently before green magic engulfed the two overlords.
As dependable and predictable as ever, old friend.
Charlie ran out of the kitchen and towards the hotel lobby as fast as she could and oh holy shit, she was still amazed at how gorgeous the new place was! So much cleaner and nicer and - wait, fuck, not the time, not the time!
Even in her rush, she was still able to wave at Nifty who gave a sweet little, “Good morning, Charlie!”, and she also apologized to Cherri who she almost charged into.
She finally spotted silver hair during her little sprint and stopped right in front of Vaggie.
The fallen angel, who Charlie knew was used to her little hyper episodes, patiently said, “Oh, hey there, what’s up?”
Charlie took a reaaaaaally deep breath before showing Vaggie the piece of paper that magically popped up in front of the Princess while she was brewing her coffee earlier.
The note simply read,
Going on a business trip.
Sending a replacement!
- Al
“Huh,” was all Vaggie said.
Charlie put the note away and leaned towards her girlfrie- ex-girlfriend.
Yeah.
That was gonna take some getting used to.
“Where is he!?” Charlie yelled, pushing down her feelings to focus on one crisis at a time. She continued with, “Business trip? Like, with Heaven? With Carmilla? Or Ohmygosh, is he way more injured than we realized? I know I asked if he was ok but maybe he was trying to be a tough guy and I should’ve insisted more and-
“Charlie,” Vaggie said calmly yet sternly, grasping the princess’ shoulders. “Take a deep breath.”
She did just that as Vaggie continued, “This is Alastor we’re talking about. First off, I highly doubt Heaven wants anything to do with him and second, you know how he is with words. May just be his fancy way of saying he wants to take a break for a while. Maybe he knows an overlord who can help him with his injury. Let’s just give him some space.”
Charlie relaxed her shoulders, each sentence Vaggie said making sense and easing her nerves.
Yes ok sure, Alastor was stronger than most demons she’d met, but that didn’t mean he was invincible!
But Charlie also knew that he preferred to do most things on his own, and she would respect that. Perhaps she could visit Rosie in a few days, to ask the cannibal overlord if she knew where he was and how he was doing.
“What I’m more curious about is,” Vaggie added and yep there ya go, shoulders tensing again. “What did he mean by sending a replacement?”
There was a knock on the hotel’s new door.
Curious - and a bit hopeful that it was a potential new sinner who wanted to be redeemed, maybe wanted to ask when the hotel’s soft reopening was -, Charlie opened the door with a cheery smile.
And was greeted with an equally beaming one plastered onto a flatscreen face.
Vox waved excitedly at Charlie. “Hello, Princess! A friend sent me. He told me you folks needed some help around here.”
Huh…
Al disappearing.
The Media Overlord knocking on their door.
All that, in one morning…
And she didn’t even get to drink her coffee!