Chapter Text
"Hey Matty, can we talk?"
"Yeah, what is it?" Matty walked over to the living room, stopping by to sit on the edge of the couch so his legs were resting over George's lap.
"I don't mean to be a bother but when was the last time we went out, like on a night out?" George asked, bored and needy for something to do on their first night in the UK before they headed off to America in half a month.
"Don't be stupid, you're never a bother," Matty poked George's cheek, laughing as he yanked his head away playfully. "in answer to your question though, I dunno, maybe like a few months ago maybe? Why?" Matty said, picking at his nail varnish whilst nuzzling his neck on Georges shoulder.
"We should go out tonight. With the lads and stuff, it'll be fun," George suggested threading his fingers through Matty's curly fringe, playing with each individual lock gently, twisting them around on the pads of his index finger. "I mean we can stay in if you'd like, but I thought it might be more fun than watching Gogglebox like we do every Saturday night we're back." George laughed, a fuzzy feeling warming up in his chest as he felt Matty giggle along too.
"Yeah sure, where do you wanna go?" Matty obliged the offer to go out, bored slightly with the usual routine they had going on.
"What about maybe like, a club?" George suggested, "Have a few drinks and stuff, maybe take back a couple girls ey?" George elbowed Matty's shoulder, urging him to say yes to the offer.
"Sure yeah whatever, I'll call the lads then ey? Although ross'll probably be off fucking John or some shit anyways to bother coming along," Matty joked.
"Ross' getting the D, ey?" George reciprocated back with a similar sentence, giggling along.
"Yeah mate," Matty winked at George.
"Call the boys now before I call them and tell them you secretly wear women's underwear," George slapped at Matty's arse, urging him to stand up.
"No I don't, fuck off," Matty slapped George on the arm shooting back laughing when he saw the look on Georges face. "Stop slapping me too you abuser, I'll ring a domestic violence helpline,"
"Come on, I've seen you nip into Ann Summers looking at all the lace knickers mate," George laughed, bantering away with him and poking his shoulder, laughing till his stomach hurt.
"I don't know what you're making fun of me for, you'd be at my feet if you saw me in a thong mate,"
"You got me there,"
"Yeah so fuck off while I call the boys," Matty stood up and walked out into the bedroom.
-
The club is loud, and the smell of alcohol and burning marijuana consumes the standing space of the small, crammed building. Matty is happily swaying by the side of George, holding a bottle of Smirnoff Ice in his frail hands and taking large swigs of the vodka grimacing at the burn, while the taller man's arms keep hooked between his two shoulders to hold him upright.
The navy blue brick walls of the club are spinning as Matty's head begins to try and process the coke he snorted in the toilets less than half an hour ago, and the numerous rows of shots he did with a girl ten minutes ago.
Talking is tricky against the bouncing rhythm of the music and the constant brushing of numerous sweaty teenagers shoulders against Matty and George's skin, making them feel almost uncomfortable dancing in the confined area, but it doesn't stop Matty from smiling effortlessly and bouncing up and down on his tiptoes like he's having the time of his life. No one seems to have noticed them at least not yet which is enough to make Matty and George both feel at least some comfort in the thought that they're surrounded by people who don't know them as their person on stage, but instead the person pissed at a club on a Saturday night.
Everyone was in the same boat and it was great to feel small again, not that they were exactly big anyways.
Manchester never did seem to disappoint when it came to the right clubs to have fun, though most of the people gathering outside were definitely chavs, and most weren't shy of a fight in favour of their stupid opinions, especially after drinking is added to the mix, but if you looked past that, it was generally okay, and you always had a good time. It was relatively cheap too compared to London, they could afford to go clubbing whenever they wanted here which felt normal but was really a luxury anywhere else.
George, when he had asked Matty earlier to come out for a bit of a do, hadn't opted for going out to a club like this. He wasn't complaining, he loved going to clubs, he could do practically anything he wanted to. He just wasn't feeling like going to one so big tonight. But Matty was desperate for some fun, and George couldn't resist.
To his own surprise, Matty had chosen a decent club, one he remembers going to with him as a teenager, choosing to go to the one they're in right now, instead of the smaller - slightly less talked about - one down the road, reminiscing memories from when they used to sneak in past the bouncers at the door when they weren't looking like excited Labrador puppies.
Adam and Ross decided they'd stay at home after the show, to finally get some sleep for once in a blue moon. But that didn't stop Matty and George from going out. George was in the mood to party and Matty wasn't turning down the offer for some late night drinks after a long week of travelling. They'd told John and Jamie their plans because it wasn't a bad idea to bring some company along with them, but they'd said they were just gonna crash for the night, 'exhausted from a long day'.
Matty's pulse is beating annoyingly fast through his veins and he can't seem to place a finger on his strange emotions while his pupils are full blown and his limbs are making a half arsed effort to dance. The alcohol is taking a toll on his movements by now, and his dance moves seem slow and drawn out, to the extent where Matty begins to feel tired.
It takes George a while to realise that Matty has been shouting for him and waving his hands around on front of his face for the period of around 20 seconds, blinking out of his daydream to turn around to look at the chocolate-brown eyes that glisten at him.
"George, I'm bored," Matty whines, resting his head on his best friend's collarbone, on his tiptoes to prove just how needy he was. "What can we do?" Matty has to shout against the music for George to hear, and his bloodshot eyes trail down towards the floor as his eyelids fall shut and the vodka he spent sixteen pounds on, spills over onto the overcrowded dance floor, few people groaning as they slip on the sticky liquid that coats the polished wood floor.
"C'mon let's take you home, mate. It's getting late," George suggests as if he were his mum or something, slurring as if to prove how much alcohol he's willingly taken into his system.
"No, I don't wanna leave," Matty groans irritated, "I just wanna do something" he pulls on the sleeve of George's t-shirt and turns his body around so his chest is pressing firmly against George's, and he's glaring at him with big puppy dog eyes whilst avoiding spilling any more of his vodka and George just can't resist.
"Fine, well what do you wanna do? We can go let a kebab at the takeaway place down the road or something? Adam told me they do a pretty good lamb tikka one," George smiles, looking down at him.
Matty ponders the question for a while before shrugging his shoulders, taking in the information that rattles around in his empty brain. After a nod that reassures George that Matty is willing to leave, George takes Matty's hand and begins leading him through the crowd of people that accumulate the surrounding area, not because they were recognised as such, but only because they were foolishly standing in the centre of the dance floor where most of the regulars that enter the nightclub are mingling.
Few people scrape at their shoulders to move whilst they continue to hardcore rave to the beat that thuds in George and Matty's ears uncomfortably loudly. George just keeps a firm grip on Matty's hand as he trails along, his body practically pushing into his back as they barge past people to leave.
The cold August night air stings on Matty's chest where the buttons of his blouse hang open, the tattoo of his beloved Nana he misses oh so much, on show to the image of alcoholics spewing bile over the edge of the curb, blind drunk, and the crowd of teenagers that consume the area of the narrow pavement, strolling through the town centre at 3am just like he and George used to when they stayed over at each others houses for the weekend.
It's strangely nostalgic, the way he can almost take himself back to the days when he was merely an adolescent.
It's weird to think back to being a teenager, it seems all so long ago. In reality it's only ten years earlier that he was seventeen and finding his way in the world.
Sober Matty would like to say that he himself has got wiser, that he's learned from his mistakes and found himself, but drunk Matty only seems to care about how much alcohol he can put in his system in one go, and laughing about stupid things that aren't even funny.
He really does miss home whilst he's on tour. He misses his Mum oh so dearly, and all of his friends he left behind for weeks on end to tour around the world with his band. The alcohol tastes different everywhere he goes, whether it's bought in Singapore, China, America or even some parts of the U.K. Maybe that's why he likes drinking so much on tour and even back at home, everything's so exotic, in an enticing way he can't describe.
The kebab shop George was talking about is a bit far down the road, so George and Matty both spend their time strolling down the street talking bullshit. Laughing about old stories from tour or nonsense that didn't quite make sense, but made sense to them two. Walking down the road George held their hands together comfortably, reeling Matty jokingly to his side, laughing when Matty would giggle and tell him to fuck off.
It was a moment to be celebrated whenever they had times like these, especially as best friends who the whole of their fan base thought were dating, The media always fussed with them about it and to get five minutes peace to themselves was a blessing, to get five hours alone was a bloody miracle, especially on a Saturday night too.
The streetlights and the moon cast shadows along the cobbled pavement of the alley, illuminating where the rain water sat stagnant in between the cracks of the stones. Matty's eyes shone a ring of dim orange, a beautiful colour highlighting his deep brown eyes, captivating George in his moments to stare shamelessly as he talked, looking in awe at the way Matty laughed at George's jokes, even if they weren't that funny.
The kebab shop was on their right within less than a couple of minutes so they each waltzed in, breaking their hands apart as they got through the door.
"Okay what do you want?" George asked pulling out his wallet to fish for a ten pound note he hoped would cover the cost of their food.
"I'm not that hungry actually. I don't know, I'm thinking just some chips instead of a whole kebab." Matty told George staggering his way to sit on a slightly sweaty stool that a man just came off of. Matty made a disgusted noise but sat on the leather seat anyways, patting the one next to him for George to perch himself on top of.
"Alright, I mean I'm gonna get one so you can share mine if you want."
Matty nodded, twisting at his curls with one hand, with the other he began tapping his fingers on the counter rhythmically while he waited.
"One chicken tikka kebab please, oh and a large portion of chips thanks," George told the tired foreign woman behind the counter. She nodded and walked off, shortly after coming back to break George and Matty's conversation asking for nine pounds seventy, taking their note and passing them the food and their thirty pence change.
They both walked out of the shop, gnawing on their food like they'd not eaten in a week, despite Matty complaining that he wasn't hungry. They were far from silent whilst eating, giggling and falling about like a couple of baby deer.
Neither were particularly lightweights when it came to drinking, but they'd had a fair amount of alcohol in their system by now, rows of shots and a good few glasses of wine and cider made them feel a bit dizzy.
Matty dropped his plastic box from the chips on the floor, watching it as it took off in the chilly breeze. George did the same, feeling bad as he remembered it wasn't biodegradable.
Dropping their litter on the floor was something both George and Matty hated ever doing, but there was no bin around anywhere near them and they didn't have any pockets. Not that that made it excusable really. But they'd already gone and done it, there was nothing else really to do about it.
Looking around George grabbed Matty's hand and pulled him across to a part of the alley which was darkened, looming above him like a giant, which he was in Matty's eyes.
"What the hell are you doing mate , you look like a pedophile," Matty burst out laughing, backing up to the wall, resting on a black bin they unfortunately didn't notice before.
"Fuck off" George laughed, "if I were a pedophile you'd be willingly coming down to my basement." George teased Matty, giggling and laughing. George didn't really know what to do if he was completely honest, he'd kinda just messed about and pulled him across to the wall but now he had no real idea what he was doing, he was just standing almost creepily above him.
George began to perspire from a mixture of nerves and the heat coming out of the back heaters behind the kebab shop, placed quite near to them, the warm gusts of wind blowing directly onto George. His hands felt clammy inside of Matty's and he awkwardly kept them together, enjoying the feel of Matty's soft skin on his.
Matty could feel the breath coming hot off of George as he stood looking down at him in his platform heels, the singer looking a bit like a woman to anyone else. His long hair and makeup didn't help either, few people walked up the back alleys at this time of night so neither were bothered about being seen by any fans out there, half of them probably wouldn't be allowed out at three in the morning in the middle of Manchester anyway. The streets got a bit rough at night, anyone decent really wouldn't want their kids running around there after their favourite celebrity.
The skin where Matty's fingers were touching on George's hand tingled pleasantly, warm in the cold night air. It was beginning to rain where they were at, and they forgot where they parked the car, so any warmth was nice for the both of them at the moment. Neither really wanted to pull away from each other, content with what they were doing.
Everything felt so nice whenever George stood by Matty, whether it was because they were messing about, or if they were chatting after a long night playing on tour. Matty left a fuzzy feeling inside George's stomach whenever they were around about together, the sound of his heart thumping inside his chest when Matty stood around him was strangely pleasant, and slightly addictive.
Matty was a drug George had became addicted to, a sweet smelling drug that bitterly stung him with an awfully arrogant attitude, but George didn't want rid of him. He'd been hooked for so long he couldn't tear away from the feeling no matter how hard he tried to, and he didn't really know how to handle it.
Before he could think, Matty's hands were fixing a part of his hair, the cold digits tingled against his skin, bringing him out of a daze to look at Matty as if he'd done something shocking. Matty just looked innocently up, looking about for someone else who George might be looking all shook up because of.
"Sorry you just had something in your hair, that's all." Matty said, his eyes looking into the part of George's hair where he'd just had his fingers through, his lips shiny from the red lipstick he put on earlier, and not to mention his tongue as he licked them. George couldn't resist looking at them, his full pretty lips, red and soft, not now chapped like his own from biting them. He felt almost guilty for admiring, staring for perhaps too long. He glanced back up at Matty's eyes, looking into them as if they were crystal balls holding his future deep inside.
"Did you really just give me the 'I wanna kiss you look'?" Matty joked, shuffling about on the balls of his feet, he laughed unclenching one of his hands from George's, to rub at his shoulder and tame the goosebumps raising up the hairs under his shirt. George shrugged his shoulders and laughed, his mind hazy and his eyes staring blankly at Matty's.
Before he had any time to process what was going on, George's hand moved nervously from Matty's hands to his face, Matty's eyes following with a glint of confusion. He lay his large hand resting on just underneath his jawline and over his cheeks carefully, threading a curl behind his ear. Matty brought his hand up to rest on top of George's own warmer hand, pressing lightly the pads on his fingers into the soft skin. George was suddenly looking towards Matty, his eyes filled with something almost fearful, a frisson climbing up his stomach to his spine, thrumming through his blood vessels.
Matty's eyes trailed from George's eyes to his lips and without a shadow of a doubt George whispered a quiet, "fuck it," sinking his head down to connect their lips, Matty suddenly yanked his head back, shocked at the sudden motion of the taller man's mouth on his. The hand on his face kept him in contact with George's face, and the stone wall behind him created a hard barrier of which he couldn't come out of, and Matty wasn't sure what to do.
For an awkward moment Matty just stood there, his eyebrows furrowed, and his eyes wide in confusion. George tensed up on Matty's lips after a few seconds noticing as Matty ceased to kiss back.
George pulled back his hands and his lips, taking a step back to rub at the nape of his neck, embarrassed and red in the face, his eyes trailed to the ground and he shuffled back awkwardly immediately struck with regret because Matty didn't seem to want to reciprocate the action back. George's heart seemed to suddenly shatter into a million fragments, the realisation that he'd utterly fucked up sinking in in the inside of his brain.
Both of their lips still remained tingling, tiny little bolts of pleasure threading in their way through the nerves in the flesh, making sure both people could still feel the romantic action they'd both just shared with each other. Matty's cheek and George's hands warming up hot from the body contact and the sudden embarrassment.
"Woah there tiger," Matty laughed it off, determined just to make it blow over so that neither of them felt uneasy for much longer, the tension providing a new awkward distance between them, a whole array of possibilities Matty didn't think he'd ever want to visit with George.
"Sorry, I uh. Don't really know what came over me to be honest, I- uh we should probably go. I mean we can stay for a while if you like, I don't know what you wanna do," George shuffled about, a sinking feeling pooling in his gut and the back of his throat, he'd just built every thing up to this moment and it'd backfired on him, and now he realised just what a bad idea it was to even try that on with Matty.
They'd just been so flirty before, it felt okay to do this by now. Matty would sit on his lap and they'd cuddle and do things that not many 'normal' best friends ever did with each other, he was certain by now that Matty felt the same way. They'd been together since George started high school and he'd just grown to become attached, but he'd messed it up now. And he prayed to God that he would not cry over a little kiss that hadn't been exchanged back.
Matty glanced up at George's face and could instantly tell George wasn't alright, his usually smiley face suddenly looked down and miserable, and his throat bobbed up and down hard. George didn't seem to want to look him in the eyes either, as if a sudden burst of pain make him weak, and he was ashamed to admit that it'd hurt him. The light picked up on George's face from a car driving past up the road, and highlighted a wet patch under his eyes, and the agonisingly long tear that ran down his cheek and fell into his mouth. George immediately sniffled and took a deep breath, shaking out into a fit of tears he couldn't control. Both because of the disappointment and also the alcohol.
Matty moved with the twisting feeling in his gut and dragged George back by his right hand, leaning on his tiptoes to stand at the same height as the younger man, facing George's eyes, now both equally looking as confused as each other. In-between Matty and George, Matty ran a hand up George's upper chest, resting it on the back of his neck comfortably.
George leaned back in and let out a horribly long breath, chuckling as Matty grimaced at the smell of the beer that lingered on George's tongue, and the lemon he could smell that George had sucked from the side of his glass of Malibu and Coke. Pressing their mouths closer together, George giggled, slowly tensing up his lips to softly peck at Matty's own red ones.
Fireworks would be an understatement for how George felt when Matty kissed him. The soft heat from Matty's hand as he pulled him closer, sunk into his bloodstream like ecstasy, bringing him forward to stand in-between Matty's legs, his waist pressing into the lower part of Matty's abdomen. George had stopped crying but wetness still clung to both of their skin now.
Endorphins rushed through both of the men's bodies, growing the kiss into something more. Their hands trailed up each other's body, feeling at each other's neck, back, waist, face. The kiss was deep, suddenly hungry. Their lips were meshing together like they were jigsaw puzzles meant to be connected together, as cliche as that seemed. The bitter taste of alcohol hung onto both of each others mouths, the two drunk and high off of the energy released out of the kiss.
Their lips didn't really feel rhythmical despite them both identifying as musicians themselves, their teeth clanked ever so slightly and both smiled and cracked a laugh. Each were positively terrified of what this meant, how it might change their friendship in the long run.
George had thought about this moment for a long time as creepy as this was, he'd often spent his time whenever Matty wasn't around, or even when he was - thinking of how Matty'd look pressed up against himself.
After a moment of Matty travelling his hands up George's body, George halted him to wrap his hands around George's neck, holding onto the lower part of his hips for dear life as George wrapped his arms around his waist to bend him slightly over to the wall.
George was pressing his tongue at Matty's lips after a few moments, looking for his reaction. When Matty opened his mouth for him, George practically growled, treading his tongue into anywhere that it would physically reach. Matty was silent, his back scraping up against the stones uncomfortably, inching George to take a step back as it was starting to graze.
"Oh shit sorry, you alright?" George asked rubbing his lips and his still wet cheeks, looking at Matty who stood in a haze, looking down at the ground almost shamefully.
Honestly Matty didn't know how to feel. He'd experimented time and time again but he's never really gotten any kicks from it. It had just felt like a normal kiss with a stranger really, slightly awkward but good enough to want to carry on.
Guilt had dragged him to carry this kiss on but he'd never even meant for him to take it further than just a peck to show he was sorry, but he'd lost his head by the first few seconds of it and parts of himself suddenly melted into George, pleasurable in a way he didn't think he'd ever actually feel.
But now it all was weirdly different, everywhere tingled and lingered warm. He'd enjoyed it more than maybe he could, but there was nothing to do other than end it or carry on. They only took one car and they lived by the same place anyways, he couldn't do anything. The wall back to their house was a good thirty minutes, and the walk back to his mums in Salford was near enough an hour at least. Neither of which he had the energy for.
He just felt so strange, his cock was surfacing and he didn't want to admit that a silly little kiss made him all hot and bothered. It was perverted, to get a boner over your best friend, especially if he's a bit younger and the same gender too, that is when you identify as a more or less straight man
George was beginning to look worried again, not enough for him to cry but enough that Matty would surely notice if he looked. George just had so many emotions running inside, especially because they'd moved forward so quickly. If they'd kept it to a simple kiss maybe he could have asked for consent, instead of going with his body language, because the body tended to go against what the mind wanted, usually ending up turning sour. He just prayed that that wasn't going to happen at that moment.
"How come you kissed back?" George asked watching as Matty shrugged and looked just as confused as George was at that moment.
"I, I don't know. I-I'm sorry I don't know what to do. I mean, I-I'm sorry I-I think I have to go." Matty stuttered out, reaching m at his back to touch at where he'd scraped it, storming past George with a look of guilt in his eyes and sorrow.
"Wait- Matty I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that. Please. come back!" George was shouting out for Matty, but he was already around the corner, presumably leaving. Matty looked back and shot a look to say something of a sorry to George, as he ran up the road.
George chased after him, ringing him up on his phone, terrified that he'd fucked them up forever. Matty didn't answer the phone, nor did he look back again as George saw him run off, tears falling across his cheeks. George's heart dropped into his feet, his throat tight as he fought off the urge to cry. He backed away into the shadows of the alley, allowing himself to weep.
It wasn't a pretty cry, or one you felt sorry for. It was an ugly cry, one where he couldn't control the horrible sounds of him gasping for air and the swallows he made as he sniffled up snot. A cry that made his shoulders shake and his cheeks sting, his face all red and blotchy. A cry that made his eyes all bloodshot and sore from rubbing them.
He just wanted everything to be how they were again, when Matty had kissed him, and how he thought of the feeling of want both of them had mutually shared. Or even before when they were simply best friends, enjoying each other's company, nothing more. Matty would come around, for the better off or the worse, but George knew he would. He'd run off and most likely come shooting back again after a while like he always did. It still hurt though, no matter how much he had faith in that they'd make it better somehow, because their was still that flicker of doubt that they might not, because he couldn't be completely certain everything would turn out okay.
Watching Matty cry was horrible, and looking at his face from the side, illuminated by traffic lights and car beamers as he allied across the road all shaken up, make George feel guiltier
George just kept replaying the image inside of his head, when he'd opened his eyes during the kiss for a millisecond, and seen Matty's eyes held shut, his curly fringe tickling on George's forehead, and the feel of his red lips when they'd lock with George's own. And the taste of red wine that draped the insides of Matty's mouth, and the smell of smoke that sat in the fibres of both of their hair.
-
In the end, Matty called up a taxi, dripping wet with rain. Crawling into the back like a soaked rag, crying his eyes out. The cabbie briefly asked him if he was alright, keen to make him feel better but Matty had kept exclusive about it, just simply saying he was fine, resting on the palm of his hand, leaning up against the window, watching the raindrops fall down the glass as small little salty tears fell into his mouth.
He'd asked to be driven to his mums house, where he could have a good proper cry in the comfort of someone close. Where he could explain the situation and get some advice from her. Because as annoying as it was, she knew just when he was wrong and she wasn't afraid to say it, just as she knew exactly when he was right too.
Maybe that was what he needed was some simple honest advice, to tell him if he'd been a dick to pull away and freak out like that, or if he'd simply been nervous to carry on. And also where he should take it next. He was sure his mum would be able to help him with that. She'd done it before with previous girlfriends and never really gotten anything wrong, despite maybe a couple loose ends here and there.
Pulling up outside was almost as uncomfortable as the car ride there, considering it was four am, he was dripping wet with rain, riddled with nerves, runny makeup, a tear soaked face, and nothing to greet her with. It'd been a good half year since he'd seen her and he just felt as if he was letting her down.
Debating asking the taxi driver to just turn around drop him off elsewhere, he pondered, looking inside of his wallet to look at his cash. He didn't have enough to turn back again so he had no choice but to get dropped off here, or sell his body or some shit. Which he didn't want to do, especially not with the dodgy taxi driver. He paid the cabbie thirty pounds and told him to keep the change, gawping up at the house as if it was a monster, willing to eat him at any given moment. He felt like a baby for being scared to pull up on his own doorstep that he'd lived on for many years, but it just felt alien after so long being away.
He plucked up the courage to walk up to the door, looking slightly terrified as he stood for a brief moment. Nervous to knock on the door and to face her this early in the morning, I just felt all wrong.
After standing like a goon for a while, setting off lights in their front garden, sure the whole of their street and his mum had already seen him, he took a shaky hand out from his jean pockets to press the doorbell. Listening to the ding from outside the house.
All was silent for a short while and Matty pressed the doorbell again, about to give up and walk back away, unsure of what to do next, pulling at his hair in distress. Luckily he heard the door go and his mum stood looking at him covering her mouth, bellowing for him to come in.
"Oh my god, are you alright, love?" Denise asked Matty, taking him into a massive hug as he walked through the door.
"I just wanna go to bed," Matty cried into her shoulder, hugging her tight.
"We can talk about it tomorrow love,
head upstairs." Denise told Matty, following him up. The spare bedroom would do for tonight, there wasn't any sheets on the duvet as of yet but she didn't suppose Matty would really care much anyways, he slept in worse conditions.
Matty felt so bad waltzing over to her house all upset and confused, it put her in a strange position where she felt guilty and he hated putting that on her at the moment. Especially when she has to look after Lou too, he was sixteen now, she had important things to do like help him with his GCSEs and make him breakfast in the morning.
Matty knew he just needed time to think. Everything had been an accident that happened so fast, he just let it happen and it was his own fault that he stormed off and got angry. He just didn't know how to feel about it all, he wanted to go back and to say sorry to George, make things as they were again. But another part of him knew if he did that, that it wouldn't be the same again no matter what he said to George. Kissing someone and forgetting about it wasn't something anyone really did, especially when the kiss wasn't all bad.
He thinks that's what scares him the most - the fact that he actually enjoyed it. He let George carry on because he wanted to, not because he was forced or couldn't pull away whenever he needed to. He knew George was gentle and he wouldn't lead him on to continue if he didn't want to, which perhaps was what made him so upset. He wasn't supposed to enjoy kissing his best friend. Sure, he's thought about it a few times but it's always been just because of experimentation or just jokingly playing around. He'd never imagined that he might actually like it.
The small spare room towards the back of the house was next door to the bathroom so on his way he went to the toilet, carrying a packet of wet wipes from his mums room. Walking in there he looked into the mirror above the sink, staring at his utterly wrecked reflection.
His eyes were red and bloodshot from crying, his eyebags all puffy and blotchy. He looked like a mess. All over a bloody kiss, he shouldn't even be upset. Especially not because he knew George wouldn't even be angry.
Matty's phone buzzed with a message he knew most likely would be George, apologising for everything. He just didn't know how to respond and thought it best to check it anyways, even if he didn't reply. The message just made Matty feel worse. It read:
'I'm sorry Matty, I didn't mean to let it all happen. It was an accident and I'm so so sorry. please, forgive me?' it was just so kind hearted. So George that it made Matty's head hurt.
He let a tear fall and decided it best not to reply, for he just needed time to think. Matty switched his phone fully off, waiting for the apple sign whilst wiping off his makeup, strolling back into the spare bedroom where he could fall asleep and forget all about it till morning.
He climbed under the covers and pulled them up to his shoulders, laying on his front, resting his head on his bicep. He closed his eyes and let sleep take over him, he was tired and he needed a good rest to put things straight again.
-
Waking up, George felt like a train wreck. His mind was dizzy and his head hurt like hell. He'd hoped Matty may have called or even came back after last night but he checked his phone and saw nothing, and when he walked into Matty's room no one was present.
Why? was all that was being repeated in George's mind, a feeling of plain regret sinking deep into his stomach when he remembered the distorted, confused look in Matty's face. Whether it be from the alcohol or the rush of emotions, It just wasn't like him to be that fussed over something so small as a kiss.
Part of him was slightly angry at Matty for freaking out so much and storming off, leaving George in the rain, especially if he actually kissed back more or less straight away. Part of him felt for him too, though - which was the problem.
He just needed to know that he was okay, Matty hadn't given any implications as to where he was going last night. He could be anywhere, pissed on a park bench or dead for all he knew. It terrified him that he had no control as to where he was, all alone and upset. God knows what state he could have gotten himself into. More than likely George assumed that Matty had gone to Adam's or Ross', or maybe his Mum's. Those were the places usually that he went to when he was in 'distress'.
Honestly it pissed him off that he hadn't even left a message to say he was okay, he understood Matty not answering the phone but the least he could do was give some evidence he'd gotten home safely, wherever he was calling 'home' at the moment.
Picking up his phone he checked the time, eleven thirty am. If Matty was in any hurry to come back to George and his apartment he'd have probably left earlier or at least be on his way by now.
George picked himself up out of bed and walked across into the kitchen, opening his phone up to see Matty had read the messages a few hours ago, well now at least he knew he had his phone with him. George resorted to calling Ross after contemplating walking over to his, realising maybe it was a more secure option considering he'd be able to say if Matty was at his instead of just barging in.
When he rang, John picked up the phone with a tired groan. Obviously he'd stayed over the previous night at Ross' George assumed.
"Oh hey John, sorry for waking you up." George apologised, suddenly feeling a little awkward.
"No, no problem." John answered, yawning. "Needed to get up anyways,"
"Oh okay, well I just wanted to ask if Matty stayed over at yours last night? Something happened last night and he's pissed at me."
"Surely he went back to yours though, he never holds a grudge on you." John sounded concerned, knowing when they had an argument it was never for longer than a couple of hours till they were apologising to each other. If he didn't come home it had to have been something that was serious.
"No, he doesn't want to see me right now, so I thought he'd go to yours or Adam's." George awkwardly answered. A lump in his throat making him sound weak, as if he were going to cry, not that he would do on the phone anyway. If he could help it.
"I don't know mate, you can call Adam maybe see if he's there, then." John tiredly answered, his eyes half open bleakly.
"Is Ross there?"
"Uh he's fast asleep still, I mean you can talk to him if you'd like just, one second-" John moved, crinkling the bedsheets, coming across as a messed up crackle in George's microphone. From the other side of the phone Ross stirred, grunting as he sat up, all confused. "Ross, G's on the phone here, he wants to talk to you, babe."
"No, no it's fine, I'll call Adam now." George said just a bit too late, and a little uncomfortable hearing the pet name John called Ross.
The recent couple didn't exactly bring the group by storm but it still felt strange when they'd kiss in public and hold hands, obviously they'd done most of the things they do now before they were really out, except for maybe the touching and the names they'd call each other.
It was sickening really, not because they were gay or whatever, but just because they were such a sickly couple, all over each other all the time.
"Hi George, Have you tried calling Matty? Surely he has his phone with him right?" Ross questioned George, yawning and stretching his arms up in the air. Ross seemed genuinely interested though rather tired, both with the fact he'd been woken up, and also with the ongoing matter at hand. Matty got himself all worked up all the time and it was no surprise to Ross he hadn't come home to George's.
"He won't answer."
"What happened to make him so mad at you?" Ross asked, concerned why Matty wouldn't at least answer to say he was alright, especially when he'd fallen out with George, they never argued for long.
"Just, uh, I did something I shouldn't have last night. I think he's a little confused." George did his best to keep what happened secret while not coming across as if he didn't trust Ross.
"This hasn't got anything to do with your, um 'tiny' crush on him is it?" Ross guessed, using quotations over 'tiny' as if George could see what he was doing through the phone call.
"Fuck, I suppose I have to tell you now then. I messed up and kissed him last night and he ran off. I don't really know why. You'd think at 27 he'd be at least more rational about the situation." George stressfully explained, rubbing at his eyes. "He kissed back and everything,"
"You're talking about Matty though, I'm sure he's fine. Probably just needs time to think. When John kissed me I was confused and shit, but we worked it out in the end." Ross offered advice, cheesy but it helped at least a fraction to ease George's worries.
"Hm," George chewed his lip.
"Just so you know you can talk to me okay? And john, we're always here you know." Ross replied, on speakerphone. George could hear him step away afterwards to what he thought was probably a drawer, sliding it open and fetching something out of it, the slam audible on the other end of the phone. John or Ross plonked themselves down onto the bed, crackling the microphone.
"Ugh, you two sound like a gross couple now, all lovey dovey." George laughed, listening to them argue about who didn't put the shampoo back in the shower last night as Ross lead the phone through the house.
"Shut up and call Adam," John retorted, jokingly kissing Ross just for the hell of it, making sure George could hear it on the other end of the line. George made an uncomfortable noise and laughed as he said his goodbyes, switching off the call, dialling Adam's number.
Adam didn't pick up the phone, his answerphone message blaring out into George's ears. The message of 'Hi, sorry you just missed me. I'm probably busy at the moment, I'll call you back later." A crackling noise signalling the end, and then the noise of the annoying woman who voiced the Vodafone voicemail service, telling him he can leave a message after the tone, which he already knew anyway.
"Uh, hi Adam. Call me back later when you can, Matty's done a runner and I was wondering if maybe he like stayed at yours or something, I don't know. Ring me back mate," George awkwardly left a message, yawning half way through. Not that it really mattered.
A short while later, maybe five minutes or so, Adam sent a text to George, noticing him about his knowledge of the situation.
Hey there mate, sorry about that. Haven't seen Matty anywhere, he definitely didn't stay overnight last night. hope you find him soon. Keep me updated.' George knew Matty most likely wasn't staying at Adam's so it didn't surprise him when Adam confirmed it. It didn't lift his spirits but at least he could guess he was probably staying at his Mums.
George gave it another go at calling Matty on his phone, hoping maybe he'd pick up just this once. When Matty's number went straight to voicemail he dashed off to go take a shower and freshen himself up a bit. At least then if anyone came to the door he wouldn't look as tired and groggy.
-
Matty clambered down the stairs borderline lethargic. His head hurt and his neck ached from sleeping so uncomfortably. Still, he had to talk to his mum. Leaving it would only be rude and wouldn't resolve anything.
Walking into the kitchen he sluggishly pulled a chair out from the table over to the breakfast bar where he planted himself down onto, sitting across from his mum who sat down peacefully reading a book.
"Morning, sorry about coming over so late last night. You must be shattered." Matty apologised guiltily.
"No, no t's fine love. Would you like to talk to me about it? The reason why you're here I mean of course. Louis isn't up yet, he's playing on his X box so whatever it is it'll stay between me and you." Denise asked, concerned for her sons wellbeing and rather shook up from finding him so upset on her doorstep last night.
"I guess I don't have a choice really... I guess I got a little drunk last night and did something stupid. I mean.. I suppose it doesn't even mean that much but... I don't know, I'm just a little worried."
"That doesn't give me much to work with dear, is it something to do with George? I mean I'm just guessing, seeing as you're here without him."
"Hm, yeah... He kissed me last night and I guess I'm just a little confused. I didn't mean to cry, it's not even a big deal... I just got a little shook up."
"Surely if you only kissed him it's not that bad, you've always been open to experimentation. Even I know that."
"I know, I know.. It's just different this time. It's not just some guy from school who I decided to knock about with.. It's just" Matty held himself back from swearing in front of his mum, and also invade Louis decided to come down do whatever reason. "Sorry. It's George and that's different." Matty took a deep breath. "What if it ruins everything?"
"I'm sure it won't, honey. If you're worried about it talk to him. I'm sure if you explain whatever you're feeling he'll understand. You guys have been best friends since the start of high school, you'll work out whatever it is you're worried about."
"Yeah..."
Silence filled the room as Matty sat, contemplating the words Denise was telling him, debating ringing him and just spilling everything out. But then that meant that George might be angry and he didn't really want to get all emotional over again. Breaking Matty out of his thoughts, Denise put her book down so the spine was facing up and she was looking at Matty.
"D'you want a brew or anything?" Denise asked Matty, standing up from the stool, turning the kettle on. Matty nodded and she took out two big mugs from the cupboard, putting them on the side, dropping a tea bag into both of them.
"You know, I always knew that boy had a crush on you," Denise laughed, though Matty just swallowed looking shocked that she'd never raised that up with him before.
"What?" Matty tapped his fingers onto the marble nervously, watching the kettle shake slightly as it heated up.
"Yeah, I spoke to him about it once, he just said it was nothing." The switch on the kettle flicked up, noticing Denise that the water had fully boiled. She filled up the mugs to around three quarters of the way, grabbing the semi-skimmed milk out of the fridge, pouring a large dollop of the liquid into the mugs. She took out the tea bags and put them into the bin, joining Matty once again at the breakfast bar. She passed him her mug and Matty smiled, saying a quick thank you as he took a sip, wincing as it was hot.
"I'm not disappointed you know, I'll love you no matter what you do. If you like him, good for you. If you don't, then sort it out. I love you more than anything Matty. Don't hold yourself back just because it's embarrassing to like your best friend or whatever." Denise paused, sipping some of her tea, tutting as she scolded her tongue. She gave out a smile as Matty seemed to lighten up a tiny bit, looking up at Denise with a look of appreciation because his mum was there for him.
"Honestly there's no need to worry, It's 2016, I'm pretty sure everyone's gay now anyways." She chuckled, taking his hand in hers and rubbing the back of it gently in little circles. Matty didn't say a word, engulfing the room into an awkward silence. "Just talk to him, he'll understand. I promise."
Matty finished his cup of tea with Denise and slid himself off of the bar stool, pulling up his jeans that he wore the day before, all groggy and covered in strawberry cider.
He took his phone out of his front pocket and pressed the on button until the apple sign showed up, noticing him that shortly it'd be switched on, looking at the five missed calls from George he hadn't picked up on, he stared at them guiltily before sliding his lock screen open. Typing his passcode and pressing the messages app.
He just a didn't know how he should feel which was the problem, he had so many emotions whirring around it was hard to choose just a few of them to describe what he felt towards the kiss. For one, he had actually enjoyed it, despite the nervous breakdown after, but two he felt guilty for it. He just didn't want to ruin what they'd gotten so close to getting, if that made any sense at all.
George's lips just felt so soft, and so different to a woman's lips, it felt natural, there was no lipstick or the chemical smell of foundation. It just felt so strange to kiss so easily, noses brushing and teeth clanking without a care in the world. He wasn't shaming women for wearing makeup, fuck he wore it himself. He just forgot how it felt like to kiss someone and not worry about smearing their highlight with his hands, the peacefulness of losing himself knowing he was touching bare skin. Something infinitesimal of a difference to anyone else, but to him it meant so much more than he ever gave it notice.
He contemplated writing a message. Just to say he was okay, but he was eventually going to go back anyway so what was the point? His mum had practically convinced him to confess to George however he was feeing so it'd only be a short time before he'd have to go back, or knowing George, he probably already knew where he'd gotten off to by now.
He concluded that he should just wait, and talk to him about it in person. Words on text didn't mean half as much as words spoken from the mouth. The only problem was that he didn't have a car, but he was sure that his mum wouldn't mind giving him a lift home. He still wanted to see Louis though while he stayed, he'd came in when he was asleep last night hopefully at least, so he'd missed him. Maybe if he got him out of his room they could go for a walk and play a game of footy, if his little brother was up for it, that was.
Matty trudged upstairs, sneaking into the bathroom to wipe his jeans and spray himself with some of his Mum's deodorant. He stunk of kebabs and beer, from the night before. Not a very nice combination he had to say. Looking into the mirror at least he didn't have to deal with smudged makeup at all, seeing as he'd handled that the night before. He simply grabbed a wet wipe from on top of the toilet and wiped where he could smell the cider in, hoping after he sprayed then the smell would go away at least a little so his brother didn't see him as something of a drunk, because he really wasn't one. Despite what the media said about him all the time.
After he'd cleaned himself up a little and he was feeling at least a little more refreshed, he walked across into Louis room, tripping over the step up to his door. Knocking on Matty took a tiny step back, leaning in past the door and asking if it was okay to come in.
Louis seemed like he didn't seem bothered by Matty coming in, looking excited to see him after he left for half a year. Matty felt bad about leaving for your whenever he left because it meant he'd missed so much at home, like birthdays and sometimes even Christmas. Last year he'd almost missed Louis' birthday, which he didn't think he could forgive himself for if he actually had.
Louis sat up in bed, not under the covers but on top of them holding an Xbox controller in his left hand. He beckoned for Matty to come sit with him on his bed, patting the spot next to him. His room was slightly messy but nothing worse than Matty's when he was a teenager, his mum would often be tidying it up and telling him to redo it when he'd trash it again ten minutes later, he was always pulling out his guitar and knocking things over, as clumsy as that sounded.
"Hey mate, sorry about not being here. I missed you a lot when I was away." Matty gave Louis a hug, pulling him so his hand was on the back of his head. Louis pulled away and smiled, patting Matty's head. Replete with utter happiness from finally seeing Matty after so long, leaving him just felt like something normal until he'd gone and then he'd miss him, especially while he was doing his GCSE's. But still, it wasn't Matty's fault at all that they had to go on tour. It was in the fact that he voiced the band but they were massively popular now so theoretically they had to go on tour despite family relationships.
"Hey, missed you too. You smell a bit funky though, did you go out last night or?" Louis laughed, smelling a mixture of deodorant and takeaway shop fat.
"Yeah, just went out with George, none of the lads came or anything." Matty nodded, resting his hands between his lap, watching Louis' eyes as he smiled.
"Cool." Louis almost awkwardly answered."I haven't really done much, 've got a holiday with my friends in a couple of weeks but nothing much else, to be honest." Louis told Matty.
They chatted for a while about things, and about Louis' girlfriend, and Matty, and his friends too. It felt nice to just talk again, to be around each other after they'd been apart for so long. Matty chatted about tour, Louis chatted about school. It all was nice. Louis passed Matty an Xbox controller and they had a game of super smash bros, despite it not exactly being the most grown up game. They still had fun though and Louis won Matty, which Louis was over the moon about but Matty, not so much.
After a while Matty asked Louis if he'd like to go for a walk, they both were quite bored and Matty wanted to see a bit of where he was from for a while just as he stayed. Louis obliged the offer and followed Matty downstairs, lending him a jacket. They walked out of the door and waved Denise goodbye as she pulled out a cigarette and waved back.
They walked for a while up the back streets on their estate, strolling chatting just until they bordered into a forest. Matty walked in with Louis, admiring the tall green trees, and all the animals crawling up and down them. Louis didn't seem to ask much about Matty, except for maybe touring and his life on stage. Matty didn't mind though, it meant they could laugh about stupid things each other did while they were away from each other.
"Are you and George okay? Like, I don't know what I heard this morning I just heard something about him liking you or something?" Louis asked rather awkwardly, chuckling after, not in an offensive manner of course. It was meant not jokingly although Matty seemed a little uncomfortable.
"Yeah, I don't know really. I still need to talk to him about it to be honest." Matty shrugged his shoulders, following Louis to a wide tree, sitting alongside him at the base of it, resting his head on the wood.
"Oh, did he kiss you or something? I don't know I heard you guys talking."
"You are a right earwigger aren't you, haven't you ever heard of minding your own business?" Matty laughed ruffling Louis' hair. "Yeah we kissed last night but i don't really know if I like him. The kiss wasn't bad or anything I suppose."
"I mean I'm not judging you for liking a man or whatever, it's just the same as liking a woman really, just got different shit down there really."
"Yeah. I'm not ashamed it's just weird because it's George I suppose"
"I'm sure you'll work it out. Just the fans might be a bit disappointed." Louis patted on Matty's shoulder in empathy. It was a little more difficult he understood to sort out a relationship like theirs, especially with it being for one, homosexual. And two, both of them being relatively famous people in the music industry. It's cause a lot of uproar among their fans and the media, hopefully most people wouldn't be that phased but there'd still be a few people who might think it strange.
"Yeah I suppose, I mean half of them think we're fucking anyway." Matty joked, laughing with Louis about it, for some reason he didn't really feel uncomfortable talking about George around Louis, he'd felt awkward around Mum earlier but maybe it felt easier because he'd already gotten it over and done with, besides he knew his little brother didn't really mind. "We're not though, just to clarify. I don't even like him though, it's all just gotten out of hand."
"Whatever," Louis smiled with his teeth.
He'd joke about it with him but he didn't really care whatever sexuality Matty was or ever could be, it just didn't matter much anymore to anyone really, and where they lived, being gay wasn't really anything other than something just to think about as the same as being straight, really. Kids would always think it was strange in his class but he wasn't bothered by it at all, it wasn't really that funny. He was in year eleven now, liking someone of the same gender didn't mean anything to anyone decent.
"I think we have to be back soon, I have revision I have to finish, just so I don't get like an F on my Spanish test." Louis groaned, disappointed he couldn't stay longer.
"Oh, okay. Yeah that's fine, I wish when I was your age I cared more about school. I just kinda skived it off all the time, it'd have made it a little easier to talk to family about," Matty snorted, looking up at the blue sky, and all the birds that flew above their heads. The world really did seem to amaze him.
"Yeah, I suppose so, it's all a load of bullshit though really." Louis sighed, "I mean they hardly even teach you how to make a proper conversation, they just tell you how to talk about your holidays two years ago or some shite like that."
"Still, you might one day need it. Like if someone randomly questions you about it for one million pounds, to answer in Spanish. At least then you'd use it." Matty laughed, sounding actually responsible which was funny. Louis laughed and scratched his knee, gazing at the white clouds momentarily covering up the sun.
"Whatever, let's get going then, hey?"
"Yeah, yeah." Louis nodded and scraped at the ground so he was crouched, allowing Matty to stand up and take his hand, pulling him up to his feet so he could stand a couple inches smaller than his big brother. They let go of each other's hands and dragged their feet down the pathway back to the estate where their mum lived, Louis kicking at the tiny pebbles in the puddles dug in the ground.
Matty really did have to be back soon to explain things to George, he couldn't stay too long.
Matty planned to stay with Louis and Denise for a couple more hours, ignoring the messages and missed calls from George, Adam, Ross and also John. He just didn't want to deal with them right now. No doubt George had already spilled about it to everyone by now.
He told his mum he had to go and that he'd visit one day in the week before he left, and that hopefully he'd try and sort things out a little. He just needed to go home for a day or two.
She offered to give him a lift and he obliged, guiltily. She said she had enough petrol to last which eased his spirits a little bit, but he still felt uneasy, he just felt like he was taking advantage of her and all she'd done for him, she'd took him in the previous night, had a face to face chat with him about George and now she was driving him twenty miles home, leaving Louis at home on his own. He didn't think Louis was bothered but it just felt a little unnerving that he was all alone. Still, she'd insisted it was no problem.
Driving down the windy roads, Matty's stomach ached enough to murder, a mixture of both nerves and hunger. He hadn't eaten since last night and his slight hangover just made it that bit worse.
His mum dropped him off at his usual takeaway place on the way close by to his and George's flat, buying a pepperoni pizza and a meat feast. Figuring maybe it'd make it easier to talk to him now that he'd have a full stomach, and also something to offer him as he arrived. He still had his keys with him, so unless George had left his keys in the inside of the door he'd be able to get in.
Walking back, the air was cold, and the thin shirt and jeans he was wearing didn't really provide suffice against the cold sting that clung to Matty's pale skin, the August air not as warm as it perhaps should be for the season it still should be in, due to the fact that the English summer profusely changes temperature all the time. The day before had been slightly warmer, enough that wearing the clothes he was stood in at that very moment would have been enough to keep warm, though now, not so much.
He liked the strange, forever changing weather though, as much as he'd complain about it just like every other damn person living in England, he liked the chill it left down his spine, and the fresh crisp that flew through the air and through his hair. He loved when it was sunny too, and everyone would rejoice, because honestly any sunshine in summer was a bloody miracle. It made him appreciate weather all the more, and it gave him motivation to write, to take the atmosphere around him and convert it into pieces of music and songs that rolled off his tongue.
He slipped past everyone walking alongside him down the streets of Manchester, practically unnoticed, a few fans shouted his name but he had his hands full with two large boxes of pizza, so he couldn't exactly take pictures with them. Still, he didn't ignore them, he waved back, moving the boxes on top of each other on one arm, waving with the other. They squealed, taking pictures and running off, satisfied with the experience of seeing him in the streets and having him notice them.
He trudged down to the block of flats, his headache having gone away by now, so he went by a little happier, in the notion that now he wasn't feeling any pain at least. He hoped he looked a little better now, too.
As he approached the building he and George associated as the apartment block leading up to their flat, Matty pressed the correct combination to open the gate into the entrance, leading up to the lifts and the stairwells for people to walk up to, to find their flat. He couldn't be bothered with the stairs so instead he followed his feet to the lift, pressing the button to send the lift down the the ground floor.
As the number above the door signified that the lift was down to where Matty was standing, Matty unhooked the rusty, vintage metal gate running along the front of the lift, making sure that he pulled it wide enough to fit through with two pizza boxes held in his arms. He managed to squeeze through carefully and pressed the button highlighting the number four, watching as it lit bright and the lift began to move up beneath him. If he was honest he'd probably make it up the stairs at the same time as he could make it up in the lift, but he wanted to keep the pizzas at least a little warm.
The ding told Matty that he'd gotten up to the right floor and he put the pizzas back into one arm, undoing the gate and stepping out so he could stand comfortably in front of his and George's flat, pulling out his keys to the door. He fumbled about to put the key in the lock, twisting it and blowing his fringe out of his eyes with his bottom lip, getting a little annoyed that he had to keep moving it out of the way all of the time.
He pushed open the door and switched the hallway light on, seeing as George hadn't turned any lights on as of yet, it seemed. Scrambled footsteps sounded and Matty caught glimpse of Allen, rushing over to his feet, jumping up at him, almost knocking the pizza boxes out of his arms.
"No, Allen. Go on, get down," Matty told Allen, giving him a stern look and relaxing into a smile when Allen's eyes went wide and he jumped back down to sit on front of Matty, his mouth all slobbery and excitedly pulled wide into what looked like a smile, his tail wagging uncontrollably fast behind him, slapping on the hard wood floor.
George came bounding in, his big feet thumping as he took steps towards the hallway, enquiring as to who was making the noise. His face softened as he saw Matty standing in the hallway, his hair all greasy and shaggy, standing wearing the same tatty pink shirt from last night and the same battered, wine-stained jeans.
Matty perked up and shot a smile in George's direction, whilst doing his best to stroke Allen and not drop the fourteen inch boxes resting on the crease of his left elbow.
"I brought pizza, just pepperoni and meat feast. Wasn't sure if you'd be hungry," Matty lifted his arm in the air to balance himself, kicking his shoes off. George didn't seem to reply and instead his expression turned into what looked like some sort of worried frown, his hands clenching in the pockets of his tracksuit pants, shirtless looking rather like a chav.
"Why didn't you contact me? I didn't even know where you were." George raised hs arms up in confusion, bewildered by how calm Matty looked after abandoning him with no hint to his whereabouts other than an opened message. He'd left George just as confused as himself, and worried sick. Matty's eyes dropped and he struggled about for what to say to him to resolve his worries. "You could've literally just sent a text saying you were coming or something, I was worried." George passively walked down the hallway and took one of the pizzas out of Matty's arm, moving out into the kitchen to place it on the counter.
"I know, I know. I'm sorry. I just needed time to think I guess, I'm back now though and I'm fine, I slept at Mum's, she just let me stay in the spare bedroom." Matty put down his pizza next to the one George placed down, pulling out the stool from behind the counter to sit down at.
"You know, I was just as confused as you were, and I'm just pissed you didn't let me know, or anyone else know for the matter, that you were staying somewhere." George stood behind the breakfast bar, his ankles crossed and his arms at either side of himself, taking his weight on his hands as he leaned on them.
"I know, I'm sorry. I just panicked I don't even know why." Matty rubbed at his eyes, kneading at his temples while doing so. George eased up at the apology Matty seemed to keep saying, knowing how arrogant and stubborn Matty is about his opinions, so if he apologised he really meant it. George took a deep sigh and scratched his head, stressed.
"Honestly I'm sorry too, I shouldn't have forced that on you last night." George shuffled about, pulling out a pizza cutter from the utensil holder to cut up the pizza, since the only real nice pizza place down the road that Matty went to didn't cut up the pizza before they gave it to him.
"You didn't force anything on me," Matty awkwardly answered honestly, holding his gaze at where George hacked away at the pizza, rolling the pizza cutter back and forth hard to slice it deep enough. Matty took a deep breath, swallowing a lump in his throat.
"I think that's why I freaked out." Matty rested his head on the balls of his hand, staring at George's seemingly perfect long fingernails.