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The sea always brought comfort to her agitated mind. Waves crashed on the shore, the same as those invading thoughts. When it happened , she always left her rock on Syrax to find the ocean. It offered a comfort different from flying on her dearest dragon’s back, different from her long-gone mother Aemma , different from the arms of the man she was supposed to love. Today , she was exhausted. She didn’t want to rejoin Syrax , storming off like a child whose mother had refused to give her something. Anger ravaged her guts like fire consuming a forest. In those moments , she wished to kill him. Daemon was a man who lacked compassion. To be frank , he lacked empathy and understanding when it came to the living world surrounding him. Her mind wondered if he even loved her , late at night as he slept in their shared bed while those doubts tormented her awake. Leaning forward , her hands flattened on the rock before her. Blue and eternal was extending before her. If only this war could end , it was what she wished for every day. Results never came out of this prayer , only blood and ashes , and death.
Alone and forsaken , that’s how you found her outside. From where you stood , all you could see was that long braid blown by the wind , dancing like wheat in the wind.
Hesitation stills you from moving farther. You were aware of her desire to remain separated from the rest of the world in those moments. You were a part of it , that world where nothing brought her comfort after all those losses , all those tears shredded , those lives taken and the grief within the chosen one became more important.
It was eating her alive.
“ Rhaenyra.” Driven by the shock of the unexpected voice , she spun around only to find you standing at her side. Wrapped in a pale blue gown reaching the pavement , intricate golden details all over the expensive material while a silver belt encircled your waist. Looped braids always frame your face , a hairstyle you’ve always cherished , but you have decided to let them down. They cascaded over your back , flowing like a river carving through rock. You smiled , sadly. Mirroring you , her head tilted on the side.
“ How did you know where to find me ? ”
“ No one saw Syrax leave.” You shortened the distance between the two of you to present her your arm. Her eyes examined your features for a while , contemplating whether she should accept your invitation. Company did not suit her at that exact time , wishing to keep words trapped in her mind for her to get lost within them.
As her hesitation left you hanging , your arm fell along your body before your limbs intertwined together above your stomach.
“ I understand that you don’t wish to be bothered. If you ever need me , I’ll be in my chambers.” At that , you turned back on your heels. And she watched. She watched you with a clenched jaw and fidgeting fingers.
You were seated in the gardens , cool grass under your naked feet as you read a thick volume placed over your lap. Reading the same paragraph over and over for the past minutes , you came to realize the book wasn’t exactly what you needed now. You had borrowed the novel from the library , looking for something to lose yourself in. Literature had always been your comfort , it didn't need much thinking. You closed the book and wondered why things couldn't have been easier. The aftermath of the war between Rhaenyra and Alicent created an important insecurity. You knew it would have been that way , after choosing your silver-pale-haired friend over her step-mother. Both were girls who shared the same age , both tied to the late King Viserys I.
As Viserys I's health was falling apart , tension rose between the two of them. It wasn't difficult for you to choose which side to take. Lifting your hand above your forehead , you glanced up at the sky. The sun shone heavily in the cloudless sky , closing your eyes like a cat accepting a gentle caress behind the ear. A shadow soon cast upon you , casually your eyes flew open. Seeing the delight of the realm standing before above was unexpected. “ May I sit with you for a while ? ”
She looked beautiful as ever with her eyes red and puffy , teeth planted into her lower lip. In those moments , she resembled a child. Hesitant , as if she feared being scolded.“ You may.” Her figure immediately filled the empty place next to you. She observed you , like you held all the answers she was looking for. “ Please , forgive me for earlier. I didn’t—”
“ I’m not mad at you.” You cut her , holding her gaze. She had the salt of the sea in her eyes , an aquatic green that brought out the silver in her hair. Every Targaryen shared those features, however none wore those like she did. Your heart thumped painfully in your ribcage , she would never know how much you wanted to tell you find her beautiful in a way a friend shouldn’t. “ Something happened with Daemon , I was told. ” Rhaenyra shifted uncomfortably beside you. “ You fought.”
She looked away , her tongue swiped across her inferior lip. “ We did. He wanted to go fight.”
“ That’s all he seems to want.”
“ Daemon wanted to fly to Kingslanding and just butcher all of them.” She explained rather calmly, yet you could feel the anger behind her words. The greens had children amongst them , the children of Aegon II himself. She needed this war to win back her claim to the Iron Throne, although she never wished for children to be butchered. Especially not by the man with whom she had children with. It was cruel , something she wasn’t.“ Oh , Nyra. Why are you this compassionate ? ”
“ Sometimes I wish I wasn’t this way, Bell .” The nickname made you smile slightly. She never called you by your name , especially after you told her about your love for bellflower. You always wore the flower scented oil. Secretly , the Targaryen woman was very fond of your scent ; sweet and delicate and so feminine. “ But you can not , not be this way. This is how you are. Wishing things could be different is just false comfort.”
“ Ever the poet , are you ? ”
“ Oh , this one isn’t from me. I borrowed it from a book.” A smile bloomed on her face , bitterness almost forgotten. Your hand soon left her shoulder and you slipped your feet back into your shoes. “ Do you want to walk with me for a while ? “ Eventually , her arm was hooked to yours while you paced together around the garden.
The sun casted its warm light over your figure and the wind blew here and there , fighting against the sun’s cruelty. It was a serene place where plants grew innocently. You loved to walk around the garden , and admired the many colorful flowers amongst the meadow. “ Sometimes ,” you started , stopping before a rose bed. They were of a peculiar smoky pink. “ I wish the earth could swallow me whole.”Rhaenyra looked over , inquiry eyes looking for any sign of foolishness but all she found was your serious expression. “ Why ? ”
“ Because it is easy. “ You sniffed , kneeling down to reach for the thorned beauties. Her gaze never left your features , even when she crouched at your level. “ It is hard sometimes. and-and so many people are counting on you , they are awaiting for a greatness that may never be destined to you. In those times of doubt , thinking about sinking down is an easier escape. Don't you think ? ”You eye her. The sea of messy curls framing your face made those blown eyes filled with odd bitterness. Her hand was already caressing your cheek , her touch like a feather , blood pumped faster through your organ.
“ I think you shouldn’t have those thoughts. What would I do without you if you disappeared ? ” You heard her say in a small trembling voice. “ You have many people here to advise you , to-to ”
“ Yet , they aren’t you. They’re not the woman who has always been there for me , who knows me.” She said your name in a disapproving tone. She couldn’t accept that you dared to pronounce those words to her. She felt insulted. “ How can you even say such a thing ? No one will ever replace you. I need you to win this war. “When she paused , the world around you fell quiet. Her other hand was always cradling your other cheek. Forced to turn entirely in her way , you both feasted on each other’s eyes.
“ I need you.” Distance dying between each other’s faces , your breath danced over your skin. Closer , her mouth hovered above yours , not kissing you yet. It was wrong , a sin she didn’t bother to name. But she couldn’t resist the urge ; her petals were wed to yours within seconds. Hungry for more , her left hand traveled to the back of your neck. Your limbs clutched on her dress’ material , bringing her even closer. Reluctantly, she quickly stepped back to catch her breath. Her cheeks were flushed from the heat, while yours burned intensely. You wondered if it was because of the stifling heat or this forbidden exchange. It didn't matter anymore because her lips found a new patch of your burning flesh. Her hands also found themselves lower, gripping your waist with a firm hold. The wind caressed the trail of moisture left by her worshipping lips, offering you the coolness you didn’t know you needed.
“ I need you too.” You managed to say with a strained voice. “ Nyra , I can’t lose you either.”Her aquamarine eyes peered up at you. She caught your lowered brows and those moist eyes of yours.
“ I’ll be fine,” she said before straightening up and planting a kiss on your cheek. Then she moved her lips to your ear and whispered in a warm, reassuring voice, “ Everything will be fine for me. You don't have to worry about me.”