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December. Either the worst month or the best. Buch always tried his best to make it good. Play good hockey, hang out with his teammates. He missed home especially during december. St Louis just didn’t snow like Russia. The only people on the team he could think of that would get it were Torpo and maybe the swedes. Torpo was spending christmas with Walker. Broberg and Holly were doing something with Kyrou and Robby this year. The team holiday party wasn’t for a while now. That left Buch to sit and wallow under his blankets, wishing he was home. It’s not like he didn’t appreciate everyone trying to cheer him up. He was playing good and keeping his routine so to Buch, there wasn’t really anything to improve on.
The Blue’s polycule esque relationships were always hard to navigate for Pavel. Most of the guys were so open and affectionate and that was something he’d never been used to. He liked being held but in his experience, being held almost always ended with him having to deny the other person sex and then feeling lonely in his blanket cocoon while they fucked off to go find someone who would support their needs. Being held and kissed equated to feeling broken because he didn’t feel comfortable having sex.
🍬🍬🍬
Sunny noticed Buch shifting away at practices. He watched as Buchy saw everyone else pairing off to head home for holiday traditions. Schenner mentioned a large arctic storm heading in the direction of STL. Buch nearly lit up at the prospect of a decent amount of snow. Sunny smiled. He wanted him as happy as possible and if snow made him happy, maybe he could arrange the best circumstances possible for a smiley Buchy.
✨Buch Support Group✨
Sunshine: does pavel like hot chocolate?
COCO-Nibs: no idea but you should make him try smores. hed looovvvee those
TorpTorp: Hot Chocolate, yes. smores, also yes. Id suggest kasha and pelmeni as well. He gets homesick around winter and said those was his favorite as kid
Sunshine: TY!! will do! <3
SinBinn: Sunny, if you werent planning on it already, Buch loves cuddles but gets rlly skittish abt it
Sunshine: noted. Ty Binns!
🍬🍬🍬
Buch pulled into Sunny’s driveway optimistic about what the rest of the day would hold. Sunny said it was just a hang out with some food. Inside was warm. It smelled weirdly like home. Sunny came around the corner with a bowl of something and smiled when he saw Buch.
“Pavel! Come in! I’m finishing the food!” Sunny waved him into the kitchen where there were several pots on the stove and a cassarole dish of some kind topped with marshmallows. Pavel sat on the counter and watched Sunny juggle the different foods effortlessly. He saw the bowl of a very familiar dish on the counter.
“You make Kasha?” Buch asked tenetively.
“Torpo sent me the the recipe. I wasn’t sure how it was supposed to taste so I wanted to wait until you got here to try it.” Sunny smiled as he handed him the bowl. It was warm and salty and tasted like home. Pavel smiled. Sunny cared enough to make food he knew and loved.
“Is good!” Buch said through a mouthful of the porridge. Sunny hugged him tightly.
“Good. I know how bad it is to miss home. And how good a home cooked meal is.” Sunny kissed Buch’s cheek gently, trying not to scare him off. The oven beeped. Sunny pulled away to open it, squeezing Pavel’s thigh to let him know he was still there. “I made cinnamon buns. It’s my Mamma’s recipe. I make it when I miss home.” Sunny admitted sheepishly as he pulled the tray out of the oven.
“Didn’t know you cook so much.” Pavel responded in awe of the carefully folded buns. Sunny smiled and nodded.
“Reminds me of home. I used to cook a lot with my Mamma.” Sunny smiled and spooned a bite of Kasha into his mouth. He leaned into Pavel as he talked fondly of childhood memories. Pavel brought his hands into Sunny’s hair, twisting and braiding the longer strands together. Sunny placed his hands on Buch’s waist, tucking his head into the crook of Pavel’s neck. He kissed Pavel’s neck. Sunny giggled. “We should probably eat all this before it gets cold.”
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After eating nearly all of the food (Buch wanted to save one of the buns to give to Torpo), they relaxed on the couch, sitting in silence and just existing near each other. Sunny tried to get close and cuddle but Pavel kept pulling away.
“Do you want to watch something?” Sunny asked, hoping there could be something that would engage Buch enough that also saved him from the awkwardness. Pavel shook his head, concentrating on his phone more.
RUSSIANS [Author’s note: this is all in russian I just rlly dont wanna translate it]
Pasha: I think Sunny is trying to fuck me. help.
TorpTorp: dude. calm down. He probably isn’t trying to fuck you
Barbie: What’s he doing?
Pasha: He made me food, keeps trying to kiss and cuddle me, and just asked if I wanted to watch a movie!
Vladi: Sounds like a date. I think he’s trying to date you
Pasha: WHY WOULD SUNNY WANT TO DATE ME?!
TorpTorp: because he thinks you’re cute and has been trying to date you for literal months now?
Pasha: ???????
Barbie: Called it.
Vladi: How did you not notice this?
TorpTorp: Because he can’t even recognize his own depression without someone pointing it out for him
Pasha: Not depressed. What do I do?
Vladi: Cuddle him? Give him any indication that you like him back?
Pasha: but what if he just wants sex?
TorpTorp: He doesn’t. But if he does, tell him you’re grateful that he went through the effort to make you happy and comfy but that you don’t enjoy sex and don’t want it. Sunny will understand.
Pasha: Okay.
Pavel started slowly moving closer to Oskar, who didn’t seem to notice as he was texting someone.
✨Buch Support Group✨
Sunshine: I think I messed up. Buchy seems more sad after I cooked for him.
SinBinn: Did you try cuddling him?
Sunshine: Yes. He seemed okay with it in the kitchen but now he’s just sitting on the other end of the couch alone.
TorpTorp: Sunny. I just text him. He think you want sex. Told him to cuddle you. BUCHY NO WANT SEX
COCO-Nibs: Jesus Torps what happened?
TorpTorp: Will say later. SUNNY! He want cuddle. ok?
Sunshine: Got it. No sex, just cuddle.
Sunny looked up from hs phone to see Buch at least a few inches closer. He smiled and patted the seat next to him. Pavel scooted over and sat next to Oskar.
“Hi.” Oskar said, pulling his friend closer. “You doing okay?” Pavel took a deep breath before responding.
“No. Miss Home.” His voice was tight with emotion.
“I get it.” Sunny said, carding though Pavel’s hair. “Is there something I can do about that?”
“Hold me?” He asked quietly, almost scared that he would get made fun of. Sunny just pulled him into his lap and covered them with a blanket. One of Oskar’s hands rubbed up and down his back while the other stroked his face and ran through his hair. Pavel sighed, relaxing into him fully.
“Warm?” Oskar asked gently, kissing Pavel’s forehead. He nodded. “I really care about you.” He muttered.
“Care about you.” Pavel echoed, kissing Oskar. “You make everything feel like home.”
“Good.” Sunny smiled as he kissed Pavel back.
🍬🍬🍬
Christmas morning came sooner than Buch expected. He showed up to Sunny’s house with a few presents in hand and a hope that maybe Sunny loved him. They’d kissed sure but that didn’t really mean anything in the long run. Buch had kissed Torpo but that meant nothing.
Sunny answered the door with a smile and gestured him in. The tree was sitting in the room with presents underneath it. There was breakfast on his coffee table, cinnamon buns and coffee. Blankets were scattered across the couch. Sunny’s cat Bjorn was attempting to climb the tree and failing spectacularly. Buch walked in and sat on the couch, quickly cuddling up to Sunny, who handed him a mug full of coffee.
“Torpo told me your usual order. I tried my best.” Sunny admitted with a smile. He handed Pavel one of the gifts from under the tree. A smallish box wrapped in plain red paper. “You should open it.”
Inside the box was a teddy bear with a blue ribbon around its neck. Pavel picked it up and looked at Sunny questioningly.
“So you can cuddle something when you feel alone and I’m not there.” Sunny muttered, blushing. Pavel handed him one of the boxes he brought with him, a rectangular box wrapped in green. Inside was a blanket with a snowy winterscape on it. Sunny hugged him. “Thank you, Pasha. It’s beautiful.”
They went through the presents they’d brought each other one by one. Cat toys for Sunny, a notebook for Buch. Fuzzy socks for Sunny, a jacket for Buch. Soon there was one present left. A small yellow box with a card attached. The card read, in shaky handwriting: “For my Sunshine.” Buch handed it to Sunny with unsteady hands, fully aware of how vulnerable he was about to be. Sunny carefully unwrapped the box. Under the paper was a small ring box. Inside the box was a silver band with three engravings, a small cartoony sun, a heart and the words, “I love you, Jag älskar dig, Я тебя люблю”.
Sunny stared in shock at the ring. He turned it over in his hands a few times, reading the engraving several times. Tears welled in his eyes as he hugged Pavel tightly. Pavel pulled back, cupping his face and wiping the tears away.
“You like?” He asked. Sunny nodded
“I really do. I love you.” Sunny replied.
“I love you too, Sunshine.” Pavel held him close.