Work Text:
December 23th
Being at the age of 27 and into the eighth year into his career, there were very few things that Hirano didn’t enjoy about his work as an idol and doing photoshoots was definitely one of those things. Since he was in two groups, he had to put up with two sessions in preparation for the holidays so they could release the pictures or the merch for those pictures in time for the New Year and it ended up becoming a hectic job every time and every year.
But a couple years ago he started to enjoy the photoshoots he shared with Kagiura, at least.
“Good morning, Hirano-san. You are the first one to arrive. The room you can use to get ready is the one on the left of the hallway,” The director of the photoshoot told Hirano, gesturing to said room. “We are in a time crunch, the morning sun could betray us at any moment so it would be amazing if you could start getting ready immediately,” she emphasized to him and another staff member came over to show him and his manager the room they would be using to change and get make-up and hair done.
“Seriously, if you know you are coming to a shoot, can you at least come with less accessories? Or none at all?” Ichinose, his manager, complained when Hirano took too long to take every single ring, necklace, earring, and also his watch off from him.
“I tried to get out of the house without them, but didn’t feel like me in the end,” Hirano replied once he was done with everything. “Where’s the clothes I’m gonna be wearing?” It was a rhetorical question because before Hirano could get a reply, he already stood up and looked at the clothing rack that was next to the mirror, inspecting if any of the sets were a different size. However there were only two sets and they were both the same size. “Only two?”
“Yes, you have the solo shots and then with Kagiura-san. But you can pick which one to do first. Because Kagiura-san is coming in a little later, they’re gonna start with your solo shots. His manager, Miyano-san, should be picking him up right now,” Ichinose said while maybe looking at the schedule on his phone—or while playing a game, Hirano never knew what Ichinose got up on his phone.
He inspected the outfits and decided to pick the satin-like golden button-up short and wine red bottoms first. The set included a lace turtleneck shirt, dress pants in the same color and material as the golden shirt and a wine red belt with a dusted golden buckle. A drawing was attached to the hanger that demonstrated how it was supposed to be worn: the laced turtleneck would be the undershirt, the golden button-up on top of it, tucked inside the dress pants. It was supposed to be accentuated by the belt.
“Ah they have the same palette across the set and your clothes. I hope it is not too monochrome…” Ichinose said when Hirano brought it over so he could start getting dressed. “Well, I will be outside and I will fetch the make-up artist in 5 minutes. Don’t get too distracted!” His manager sternly—but also kindly—warned and left.
The warning was not really necessary because Hirano was good at getting changed in less than 5 minutes thanks to concert wardrobe changes and he knew that Ichinose knew that, but it had become a part of their routine nonetheless.
He changed quickly with plenty of time to spare before the make-up artist came up, so he decided to send a text to Kagiura.
oi. how long is it gonna take you to arrive at the shoot
Read 07:17
We agreed to go in at different times!
So no one notices we are coming from the same place
ETA 10 minutes
(๑>◡<๑)
Sent 07:19
Hirano tried really hard to not smile at his phone like a fool and get caught so he turned it off and put it down next to all his jewelry. Unsurprisingly it ended up next to Hirano’s oldest pair of earrings. When he heard the door handle turn twice he sighed. Ichinose had been very insistent on giving him a signal so he could know when he was coming in so as to not surprise him.
It had been necessary because one time this manager of his had found him and Kagiura making out in a supply closet. After giving them both an earful about locking doors and being as careful as possible, he proceeded to congratulate them and and insisted on making up a signal so any of them would know when he was coming in with other people in tow.
“Hello, Hirano-san. I brought the make-up artist so he can get started,” Ichinose announced and let the other guy in. “I’ll be at the entrance waiting for Kagiura-san and Miyano-san so he can start getting ready as soon as possible.” Quick, clear and without another word he left the room.
Make-up was one of the things he couldn’t fully get used to despite it being a part of his day to day. A couple of times the directors for their videos or photoshoots had wanted stuff that really emphasized one or a few features of their faces. This time they seemed to just be going for red eyeliner, little specks of glitter on his cheeks and gloss for his lips and he was grateful for the lack of a flashy look.
“Well, you do have thin lips, Hirano-san. The lipgloss is meant to make them pop!” Kagiura had said to him once a few years ago when he was cleaning his face and complained that he didn’t understand lipgloss.
For the last touches he was given a set of gold earrings to finish the outfit and then his hair was quickly shaped to look more elegant.
When he was leaving his designated changing room, he saw Kagiura trailing behind Ichinose and Miyano to the next room over. They exchanged a high five and Hirano heard Ichinose snicker.
He understood the snicker well enough: You are ridiculous for acting like friends when you are in a relationship. And the bone-deep sentiment of wanting to be semi-public about their relationship came back. Maybe not the whole world had to know but at least they wouldn’t have to pretend they weren’t boyfriends while working together. They often had to leave their apartment at different times so no one would see them leaving from the same place since the public at large had been told they lived in different apartments and their agency was under the impression that they were just roommates. But when they had shoots together they had to act like they were only colleagues or coworkers, friends at best. But Hirano was really tired of all that and had been playing with an idea of how to change that.
And the upcoming date was crucial for it. For Kagiura’s birthday they had arranged long ago that they would exchange gifts for Christmas but Hirano always insisted on getting him a second gift for his birthday and he knew that Kagiura always looked forward to that. This time they chose a lower budget for their exchange for no reason other than they tended to go all out on gifts for the other. But for Kagiura’s birthday gift, Hirano had planned the approach of going big because going home wasn’t an option.
Hirano’s train of thought paused once he arrived at the designated area of the photoshoot, after all it wasn’t more than twenty steps from the rooms to the living room. Their label had rented a penthouse decorated for Christmas and the color palette was full of red, white and golden colors. With the addition of the morning light from the floor to ceiling windows it gave a really cozy atmosphere and Hirano understood the color palette of his outfit better. They weren’t the exact same colors but they matched well.
Once he was in position and heard the first instructions, he turned off his brain and let the camera clicks and flashes rain down on him.
Photoshoots weren’t Hirano’s favorite but at least he was efficient in doing them, the photographers commented they were glad they didn’t have to do multiple takes to get the look they wanted. In record time he was done and was asked to change outfits while they moved the furniture around for the pictures they would take of both of them. The couple shots, as Hirano privately called them and what he had seen a few fans call them as well.
He changed just as fast the second time. This time he was given a silk dusted gold shirt with sleeves that reached his elbows, a red wine corset vest with swirly golden embroidery and dress pants in the same color as the shirt. He congratulated the stylist for this one because putting on these clothes didn’t involve the risk of messing up both hair and make-up. Plus, both ensembles and the set gave the ambience of a fancy and expensive Christmas celebration and it looked very nice. The more he saw himself in the mirror, the more he liked the golden swirl earrings and decided he would ask if he could take those home.
When he returned to the set, he saw Kagiura chatting with Miyano and Ichinose. His hair was half up with a gold colored clip and he wore some blush on his cheeks. Instead of eyeliner, they used glittery gold eyeshadow on his eyes and he too had lipgloss on his lips. But Hirano insisted that make-up always looked better on Kagiura than on him.
The clothes that Kagiura chose for their shared photoshoot were the same color palette as Hirano’s except the colors were inverted. He was wearing a turtleneck satin shirt in wine red with a ribbon, a gold dusted color knit vest and wine red dress pants.
“Oh you two match very nicely!” Miyano gasped with surprise. Hirano remembered that Miyano enjoyed seeing Hirano and Kagiura match accidentally a lot of times.
“When we arrived I heard the staff make bets if they would miraculously sync up for their outfit choices,” Ichinose snickered.
“Why would they do that?” Hirano huffed, slightly amused.
“Well I dunno about that, but a lot of people lost! We were very few people that believed in you,” Ichinose said and showed an envelope, presumably with the money of a won bet. “They were quick to admit defeat the moment Kagiura-san walked out the door.”
Kagiura looked at him and smiled. His expression seemed to say “Maybe we should make an effort to look closer to people.”
Or something like that. Really, Hirano was just guessing here.
“Okay gentlemen, may we start?” The director said and everyone seemed to go back to their positions.
When Hirano did photoshoots with his teammates, the air around them tended to oscillate between playful and serious, between bickering and affectionate and the perception of time differs when he is around them. The mood pretty much always depended on the director’s energy but paired with Kagiura, the director and the photographers could be low on energy and the shoot would still go over effortlessly and produce beautiful shots. It was not just Hirano having it easy because he lived with Kagiura so he was comfortable by default with him, but the younger boy simply made everyone feel their energy invigorated.
The way Kagiura acted around photoshoot crews was the same as with fans: he would constantly talk to them, give suggestions and do his very best. That helped Hirano as well because Kagiura effortlessly made him be the best version that he could be. In fact, he often had to actively control his expressions from smiling too much because it just happened whenever Kagiura was around.
The concept for this photoshoot was a Christmas spent with friends, therefore whenever the director gave suggestions for them to act friendly, Hirano and Kagiura would easily flow into a rhythm that everyone in the room approved of. They played rock-paper-scissors, opened fake gifts, pretended to decorate the Christmas tree and even started singing a couple of Christmas carols—they were asked to fake sing but they couldn’t do that.
Despite being in a rush because of the rising sun, they spent most of the allotted time doing the shared pictures. Only once Ichinose and Miyano reminded the director of Kagiura's solo shoot to still use the sunrise to the fullest, she finally wrapped up their shared time.
Hirano wanted to say “See you at home, Kagi-kun” but Kagiura was already being scurried away to start changing for his solo shoots. Before Hirano left to change and pick up his stuff, he approached the director. She was a woman with long dark hair that had make-up done as if she were the one to be taken pictures of. Hirano guessed that’s why she had a sure aesthetic of what she wanted.
“Excuse me,” Hirano bowed when he approached her.
“Hirano-san, great job today. What can I help you with?” She sounded full of energy, quite different from the stressed energy she had when he first arrived.
“Thank you for your hard work. I was meaning to ask if I can pay you to take these earrings home?” He pointed to the swirly golden earrings he was wearing. “I really liked them.”
“Oh! That would be an honor, you don’t need to pay me.” She said, a confident smile on her face. “Truth be told my sister and I started a jewelry business and I brought some of her pieces for this shoot, so it is high praise you want to take them.”
Hirano nodded, asked her to send him the details of their business so he could shop there in the future and finally went back to get changed. By the time he was done, Ichinose had already left. Hirano thanked everyone for their hard work and went into the elevator for the parking basement. He felt disappointed that he couldn’t say bye to Kagiura but well... At least he would be seeing him at home later.
It didn’t take long to find the agency’s car and Ichinose inside.
“That’s a wrap for you, Hirano-san!” Ichinose clapped before turning the car on. “I know it is the 23rd and this might be considered late for photoshoot schedules but we couldn’t schedule it earlier. Good news is that you have until New Years for a break. Is there something I can help you with before dropping you off at your apartment?”
Hirano had been waiting for this moment, he knew Kagiura’s schedule and that he would be held back by one brand ambassador photoshoot after this one so he would be coming home later. It was a perfect opportunity.
“Yes, can you take me to the shopping district? I need jewelry.”
“More jewelry for you?”
“Well, have you heard of doing the thing with a tiny box enclosed in larger boxes? I want the last thing in the box to be a ring.”
Ichinose was so good at driving he barely flinched and Hirano had to give him credit for not fully stopping the car in the middle of the street despite his shock.
Hirano was always comfortable with Ichinose. More than his manager, he was a really good friend. He took the news of him and Kagiura dating really well and he had made it his life’s mission to help them in anything they needed. Not even Kagiura’s manager Miyano knew about them. And out of their teammates only one of Kagiura’s knew.
“Are you going to propose!?”
Ichinose asked, more surprised than shocked. His reaction had been so positive that Hirano immediately felt relieved.
Other idols thought that a marriage before turning 30 wasn’t a safe choice and it was more likely to end in divorce. If it went public, then the generalized opinion wasn’t going to be favorable for a while, never mind the backlash they could receive for both Kagiura and him being men. Plus the added belief that proposing on a partner’s birthday was bad luck.
It was murky waters that Hirano was plunging himself into.
But he was sure. They had been dating for six and half out of their nine years of knowing each other and Hirano was sure no other person in this life could even compare to the happiness that was inherent to being with Kagiura.
Happiness isn’t a person but he was sure as hell that it was easier to be happy with some people rather than others. And Kagiura Akira was that for him.
“Yes, I am sure I want this for life.” Hirano said, calmer than he expected. He wasn’t good at this topic and despite him being comfortable with Ichinose, romance was still a difficult topic to broach for him.
“You gotta let me know what his reaction is! I wish you happiness, Hirano-san. As your friend rather than your manager.” Ichinose took the moment of stopping at a red light to look at him and smile. “Do you plan on letting the agency know or are you two going to elope?”
Another point that Hirano was glad for was Ichinose’s support. Hirano didn’t think Kagiura was going to reject him. Well, he hoped.... But that Ichinose sounded so sure about the outcome was also relieving.
“I will discuss that with Kagi-kun eventually. I intend for our agency to know at least, though, coming and going to our schedules at different times can be a hassle.”
Him and Ichinose talked a bit more on the ride, Ichinose giving his perspective as part of the management and it was reassuring that Hirano—and his future fiancé—had such strong support.
When they arrived at the shopping district, Hirano took his face mask and an old-looking baseball cap. He hated to be seen by the press even if shopping for jewelry was something common for him, those vultures loved to spin it into crazy tales.
Ichinose suggested that he pick it up, in case the clerk could recognize Hirano’s voice. At first he wasn’t too bothered by it because he ordered and customized the ring online, he just wanted to pick it up at the store because Kagiura could check their mail and Hirano wasn’t going to let that happen.
“I used an alias to buy it though. And to pick it up I just have to show the digital ticket.” Hirano replied to Ichinose’s suggestion.
“Your voice is still quite recognizable! What if they know that the ring inside the package is way bigger than what your hand looks like? No one would recognize my voice anyways.”
Ichinose had a valid point despite it being a little paranoid and maybe too distrustful of people that probably provided service to lots of idols every day, the store was expensive after all. But Hirano compromised on letting Ichinose’s weak stomach not tie itself into knots and handle it for him. Plus, his manager was well aware how much Hirano disliked the press knowing about his private life and he had saved Hirano—and Kagiura by extension—a great amount of times.
While Ichinose picked up the order, Hirano looked around the fancy stationary shop nearby and picked six gift boxes, making sure they could fit inside of each other. Two had cute dog patterns, one had roses and the other three were simple Christmas styled gift boxes.
It was a short trip and in no more than fifteen minutes they both returned to the car.
“I swear, finding a parking spot took us longer than the time we spent here.” Ichinose handed him the tiny paper bag from the store and started the car.
Hirano couldn’t help but take a peek at the ring inside and sighed in relief. It was the perfect size and exactly how he imagined when he ordered it.
“I didn’t want to ask but I am deeply curious, Hirano-san. How did you measure Kagiura-san’s ring finger without him noticing?”
“He is a heavy sleeper for one thing, not a morning person for another. I can do a lot of things to him while he sleeps and he wouldn’t know.” Well, at least Hirano hoped he didn’t know about this particular thing.
Hirano and Kagiura were so well synchronized that it worked magnificently for their work. Whether it was choreographies or performances, they fit together perfectly. When writing or composing together, they landed on the same wavelength really easily and were so in tune when they were interviewed publicly that some fans even called them soulmates because of how well they got along with each other in public.
And that was what they did effortlessly, Hirano even considered that match to be less than how well they fit together in private. When their public personas were gone, they fit together like perfect puzzle pieces and Hirano sometimes wondered if they had some kind of telepathy because it was that precise.
All of it was perfect until they had to surprise each other because they knew each other that well.
“Again, good luck! And tell Kagiura-san happy birthday in two days. Enjoy your break until New Year’s and then we’re back at work. I’ll send you your schedule at the earliest time on January first. Bye!” Ichinose said without taking a second to breathe once he dropped Hirano off and left.
Once Hirano was inside their apartment and realized he was alone, he missed his boyfriend immediately so he pulled out his phone to text Kagiura.
how long until you arrive home?
Read 14:23
I should be there in one hour
Doing some christmas shopping with Miyano
Sent 14:24
and not with me?
Read 14:24
Hirano-saaaaaan
(*´Д｀*)
I am buying your surprise gift!
Sent 14:26
Hirano left his phone on the kitchen counter and started wrapping Kagiura’s Christmas and Birthday present so he could hide it somewhere out of Kagiura’s sight for two days at least. As per usual, they did their Christmas exchange at midnight of the 25th so realistically it was a day and a half.
When they started the tradition, they had promised to not look at what present the other got if they accidentally found it. And Hirano trusted Kagiura to not open it before his birthday.
He carefully placed the ring box inside the smallest box among some bubble wrap so it wouldn’t make noise and sound suspicious when he moved it around and repeated this process for another five boxes. When he was done, he went to his in-home studio and hid the box in the lowest shelf of his bookshelf next to a small box with his other gift for him, a sweater with an embroidered and Christmas themed Cinnamoroll on it that he knew Kagiura would like.
The hiding place was a perfect one because Kagiura liked to occasionally pick books from the bookshelf but he had read all the ones on the bottom shelf already and didn’t do much reading in the week of his birthday either, so the chances of him finding the boxes right there were slim.
A soft smile only ever reserved for Kagiura graced his lips. Knowing how the other would act was something that had become something akin to second nature for him and he found comfort in that.
With warm feelings rising inside him, he made use of his studio and started working on some music.
He had always been proud of the music he made and felt accomplished when he started writing for other groups too, but the music that came out from the sessions he made around Kagiura’s birthdays always ended up being very successful hits. Some may call it the power of true love but Hirano often thought of it as a natural consequence of living with Kagiura. Doing so had shaped him from top to bottom and when his boyfriend was happy, it was hard for Hirano to not be happy as well.
Music was his passion and Kagiura was his love. They both fit in the same space like it was meant to be.
Without noticing how much time had passed, his focus was only broken when he noticed the lights flickering on and off twice, which was a signal Kagiura had made for him whenever he got too into the zone and neglected his surroundings. He took off his noise cancelling earphones and when he turned around, Kagiura was leaning against the door, smiling and handsome as always.
“You have been going for like 3 hours, Hirano-san.”
“It has really been that long?”
“When I arrived home you were in here and I didn’t want to disturb you but I just finished making food. Would you have dinner with me?” Kagiura asked, his voice warm and sincere. He held his hand out waiting for Hirano to take it.
And who was he to reject him?
“Dinner made by you? There’s no way I am refusing,” Hirano replied as he stood up and took Kagiura’s hand. The words "dinner made by my handsome husband?” almost left his lips and he was glad they didn’t. Not yet.
Their apartment wasn’t extremely big, it had three bedrooms, two bathrooms, a kitchen and living room. Their shared bedroom was the last door along the corridor with an en suite, one of the rooms was designated as a practice room mostly for Kagiura to use and the last room had become Hirano’s in-home soundproofed studio. It was also the room closest to the kitchen and far too soon, they had to let go of each other’s hand.
But Hirano still loved to indulge Kagiura in holding hands. Especially when he knew that his boyfriend would be sulking from not being able to interact much earlier that day during their photoshoot. And to be fair, Hirano missed physical contact a lot when they were doing work and he had to act “professional”.
“What did you make today?” Hirano asked once Kagiura had led them to the already set dinner table.
“I was feeling really tired from shopping and the photoshoot so I made something simple, Katsu Curry with some rice and veggies!”
Hirano was reminded that Kagiura had been taught how to cook for himself by his mother and big sister when he was younger. Throughout the years of living with Kagiura, he had found a liking for cooking for them both, to the point that he had become really good at it and was even called in for some cooking variety shows when Hirano had revealed that—on accident—in an interview a couple years ago. Whenever he ended up going, the hosts were always impressed at Kagiura’s cooking skills.
They often cooked for each other but at some point they ended up with different roles in the kitchen. Kagiura enjoyed home cooking the most and had even called Hirano’s mother on occasion for some of his favorite childhood recipes, meanwhile Hirano ended up perfecting a few pastries and sweets recipes, especially ones with strawberries, because Kagiura enjoyed those a lot. Sasaki, his teammate who was also a skilled baker, had some good tips here and there too.
Before they even started dating, they kept giving each other gifts as thank yous. This custom continued on once they were a couple and Hirano hoped that it wouldn’t stop anytime soon.
“Were your solo photoshoots stressful?” Hirano asked after a moment of comfortable silence.
“Hm? Not at all, although they were rushing a bit in case the sky got cloudy or the sun disappeared from their ideal range. You know photographers,” Kagiura explained, considering his answer a bit. He was always so polite as to never talk with his mouth full.
“They can fix that in post production no doubt though.”
“One of them was talking about shadows and positions, so maybe it is harder because of that?”
“Don’t you think some photographers talk like the weather should do whatever they want?” Hirano asked no one in particular. Just a thought he had.
“I bet more people would wish to control the weather rather than just people doing idol photoshoots,” Kagiura chuckled. “I am happy we could work together for the last schedule of the year though!”
“Same, if I had to see Sasaki’s face another time this month, the press would be spreading rumours about a disband,” Hirano joked lightheartedly and Kagiura laughed.
“Niibashi wanted Hanzawa-san and I to go to his house on the 30th for a livestream though, so I will see my teammates one more time before we return to work,” Kagiura said when he carried away the dishes and started washing them before Hirano could object to it. But he stayed at the dinner table to keep their conversation going.
“That’s still work, your managers will have to go to supervise you guys don’t spoil something on there.”
“It happened once and Niibashi thought the agency had already announced it!”
“You almost spoiled our new album twice in one month before it got announced,” Hirano replied with no real malice behind it.
“Hirano-san, will you let that go?” Kagiura sounded ashamed of it, which was always adorable. Teasing Kagiura was always a bit too easy.
“Not until our managers forget about it too,” He replied, sounding serious for a second before he started chuckling.
“Stop teasing me….”
Hirano wanted to make it up to him so he stood up from his seat and hugged Kagiura from behind, circling his hands on his abdomen.
“You’re gonna make the plate disappear if you keep scrubbing it, Kagi-kun,” Hirano quipped . Kagiura mumbled something but it was too low for Hirano to hear. “Hm?”
“I’m done!”
In a split second, Hirano worried he had teased Kagiura too much and made him upset but before he could apologize, he felt Kagiura turn around and then his hands cupping his cheeks and–
Oh.
Kagiura was kissing him a little desperately and Hirano could feel himself melt into it. Kagiura’s hands smelled of oranges like their dish soap before they moved further and started roaming down Hirano’s body. Kagiura himself still carried hints of all the condiments he had used while cooking.
Kagiura smelled like home.
The domesticity engraved in the moment and the anticipation that had been building inside Hirano for the upcoming day made Hirano lose his mind a little. He deepened the kiss and let his hands rest on Kagiura’s neck, pulling him closer.
When Kagiura paused their kiss for air, he started to immediately press small and quick kisses all over Hirano’s face. Whispering in between each of them.
“You have no idea how much I wanted to kiss you during our photoshoot today.” Kagiura’s low voice made Hirano feel shivers all down his spine, he turned his face slightly to meet a couple of Kagiura’s kisses in between words. “The corset they made you wear too, I kept thinking about it for the rest of the day.” Kagiura’s lips traveled down to Hirano’s neck while his hands pressed on Hirano’s waist, if he wasn’t wearing two layers of shirts he could probably expect bruises.
Usually Hirano would chide him for the hickeys, because most of the time they had schedules they had to look presentable for, but with their holiday already being on, there was nothing stopping Kagiura from marking him anywhere he wished and Hirano couldn’t help but gulp, already craving more.
“Kagi-kun…”
“The red eyeliner they had you wear too, there’s going to be a lot of talk about it when the pics are out.” Kagiura pulled Hirano’s shirt down a little and bit gently on Hirano’s collarbone and he continued trailing kisses downwards. “My boyfriend is the hottest person ever.”
“That’s my line.” Hirano couldn’t take it anymore and he pulled the collar of Kagiura’s cardigan and kissed him again.
The sensations on his skin were making it feel warmer, the low temperature weather of winter completely forgotten. Hirano could feel his brain fogging, leaving only a continuous chant of Kagiura’s name in it. He didn’t know when the mood had shifted or how and he couldn’t care less about it, he only knew he needed Kagiura on their bed right then and there.
“Hey, let’s shower together,” Hirano said once their mouths parted for air again. He knew full well that Kagiura picked up on his meaning immediately because without any kind of confirmation, he was being carried with his legs dangling on Kagiura’s sides to their bedroom’s en suite.
Teasing Kagiura was all fun and games until his boyfriend had enough of it and would snap and have his way with Hirano for the rest of the evening.
This was not a one time occurrence, but rather their daily life was just like that.
And considering Hirano had been wearing things to purposefully make himself look more eye-catching. Kagiura was not immune to it and Hirano had been waiting for the moment Kagiura’s self restraint would wear thin and when he would voice all the thoughts he had in the morning and act on his impulses.
Hirano loved that Kagiura always looked and behaved particularly well in public most of the time. But he also loved when Kagiura acted on his impulses and was completely honest with what he wanted.
In the blink of an eye they had arrived in the shower and Kagiura was working on taking off all layers of Hirano’s clothing and accessories.
With such gentle handling, Hirano could turn off his brain for the day and let himself enjoy the evening with his beloved.
December 24th
When Hirano woke up the next day, the first thing that he saw was Kagiura’s eyelashes sitting on his cheeks as he slept and the thought of waking up next to him every morning warmed his heart in an overwhelming way.
He remembered the time they had been assigned as roommates during their training before their respective debuts and they barely knew each other, Hirano had thought that Kagiura worked too hard for someone who was already good-looking and had a nice voice, why did he want to become good at dancing too?
But instead of calling out Hirano’s apparent jealousy, Kagiura looked straight at him, determined and passionate and said sincerely: “I want to give this my all. Just like you.” Hirano admired his reply so deeply, he started working with him instead of next to him.
After that, more moments kept endearing Hirano to Kagiura. The two of them worked so hard and had achieved great things since then.
He remembered Kagiura giving him a pair of earrings and how deeply Hirano had appreciated that pair and every single gift that followed after.
Looking at Kagiura’s slightly open mouth, Hirano remembered their first kiss. About how it hadn’t been perfect but it was theirs and how they kept trying. He couldn’t help himself and place a peck on his boyfriend despite their combined awful morning breath. Kagiura probably felt it and tried to blink his sleep away.
“Hirano-san?” Kagiura slurred a bit, not fully awake.
“Go back to sleep, I’ll be in the kitchen making tonight’s dessert. Okay?”
“Hn.” With a sound of confirmation, Kagiura went back to sleeping with a hint of a smile. Hirano really loved all of Kagiura’s smiles and he couldn’t pick a favorite but in that specific moment, this sleepy smile was Hirano’s favorite.
He left their bed, doing his best to not to move Kagiura’s blanket, picked up his pants and Kagiura’s cardigan from their pile of discarded clothes from the previous night and made his way to the kitchen.
Before he got to finding everything he needed for the dessert, he picked some cereal and ate in silence. Snow was falling outside the floor-to-ceiling windows of their apartment. He felt the chill more because he had his bare feet on the floor. He considered turning the heat on but he was still feeling lazy from sleep and decided to wear a couple extra layers from a closet that was closer than the heater.
He opened their pantry and started getting to work. Making desserts was not something he did spontaneously. He knew that his teammate Sasaki had grown up baking and it was something he enjoyed doing often for himself rather than for others, but Hirano? He mostly enjoyed doing so for Kagiura and on specific occasions. He wouldn’t make complicated recipes either at first because he messed up the measurements a couple of times, but after a while he bought more fancy equipment so he could experiment more often.
This time he was keeping it simple: sugar cookies with strawberries and some chocolate cupcakes. He decided to go with basketball decorations on the cupcakes because Kagiura had always enjoyed watching his favorite teams play and went to their games whenever he could And especially this year he had talked about it during a couple of interviews which led to a variety show organizing a meeting between him and his favorites
Usually, Hirano’s mind was awfully quiet while he baked but given the circumstances, he couldn’t stop thinking about his boyfriend. It was Kagiura’s birthday. He was making snacks for Kagiura. He was going to propose to Kagiura.
He stopped rolling the dough for a second—he hadn’t noticed when he started doing that— and covered his face immediately. He could feel his face flushing like a tomato. He had to focus back on the matter at hand which was baking. Not thinking about how badly he wanted it to be midnight already so he could get everything off his chest.
After a few minutes, he shook off all his dreamy thoughts, noticing how cold he felt. Having beaten his laziness, he turned the heat on, put on socks and concentrated enough to get through the motions of measuring, rolling dough, cutting strawberries into tiny pieces and then cutting out the cookies in a handful of Christmas shapes.
Once he was done with the cookies, he got started with the preparation of the cupcakes and time blended together between tasks. Before he realized, he was already waiting for the cupcakes to rise. He took care of everything rather efficiently and by noon—a few hours after waking up—he had finished everything and was washing everything he used when Kagiura finally awoke and walked into the kitchen.
“How did you let me sleep so late, Hirano-san?” His hugged Hirano from behind with his eyes still closed and rested his head on him. To this day it was rare for him to sleep in. Kagiura often woke up early so he could go to practice, really dedicated to his work.
“I’m not your babysitter, you can wake up fine on your own,” Hirano replied with a smile, his words had no bite and he patted the hands placed on his stomach.
“It smells really good here.”
“It’s the strawberries you’re smelling.”
They stayed like that, in front of the sink, sounds of water drops and their breathing, with the snow falling in slow motion and the smell of sugar and strawberries filling the air.
Hirano didn’t think often about what ifs but he was sure he would choose to stay by Kagiura’s side in any timeline he would be allowed to meet him. Maybe he would haggle with the gods to allow him to be roommates every time.
“Hirano-san, what do you want for Christmas?” Kagiura interrupted his musing and brought his attention back to the giant human that was on top of him. “I already bought your gift but I want to know if I picked something you wanted.”
Hirano considered his answer for a bit. His real answer was For you to say yes but that would give everything away, so he picked the second best thing.
“I want a puppy.”
“For the third year in a row, I’m not giving you a puppy for Christmas. You have me, why would you want a puppy?” Hirano snickered when he heard Kagiura’s childish petulant tone. He knew this was the reaction every time. “Won’t it get lonely if we go on tour?” Kagiura asked suddenly and surprised Hirano with how serious he sounded about the topic.
“I’m sure either of our families would take it for that time.” Hirano had considered this a couple of times and had even talked about it with his parents so he had no worries. But he found it sweet that Kagiura had started considering it that deeply. “Is that what worries you?”
“I don’t want it to miss us or think we abandoned it, I heard they do that.”
“Y’know, Ichinose-san has a dog, he comes with us on tour a lot too. What he does is: he makes his father come over to babysit his home and his dog. And because the dog stays in his home it doesn’t think it was abandoned, at least that’s how Ichinose-san has felt about it.” Again, this was something he had considered as well and asked around and his heart kept swelling at the thought that Kagiura was really considering his request.
“...Let’s go to an animal shelter after the New Year, okay?” He whispered, he sounded just like all the times he ended up indulging Hirano’s requests.
Hirano turned around and kissed Kagiura with so much joy. Convincing Kagiura had actually been an effort and from the tone of his voice across all the questions he asked, he had truly considered it.
“We’ll go when you’re ready.” Hirano kissed Kagiura’s cheek too and stared into Kagiura’s surprised eyes. Hirano always loved that Kagiura’s eyes were so dark because when they twinkled with emotion they looked like the night sky. “But thank you for saying yes to it.”
“It would be unfair of me to keep saying no, wouldn’t it? And if I have anxieties before we visit the shelter then I’ll ask you. Because you have considered it a lot and thought it through, right, Hirano-san?”
As Kagiura kept speaking, he nuzzled his face into the space between Hirano’s shoulder and neck. It had been years but Hirano always found himself feeling a little embarrassed on how easy it was for Kagiura to be physically affectionate and how hard it was for him to reciprocate it as easily so he just clung tighter to him.
“Have you thought about what you wanna order for dinner?” Hirano asked once he felt his red face go back to a normal shade.
“Actually… Yesterday I brought stuff for us to cook together.”
Hirano smiled to himself, still clinging to Kagiura.
“Did you have something in mind?” When Hirano asked, Kagiura—reluctantly—let go of him and fished his phone out of his pants.
“Saw this on social media the other day, it is salmon with potato! I think it is a gratin, your mom made something like this a few months ago when we went to visit.”
“Oh, could we add plum?”
“I’m sure we can, we must still have some in the pantry.” Kagiura said and Hirano saw him pull up his grocery list and add more plum on it. “Oh and I have been craving Zenzai, I know you took care of the dessert already but–”
“If you want it, we can make it too. It is your birthday, we'll make whatever you want.” Hirano gently cradled Kagiura’s cheek. It was not lost on Hirano that he spoiled Kagiura a lot, but who could blame him? Something primal in him urged him to make Kagiura as happy as possible. His boyfriend looked too happy, like a beautiful painting that shouldn’t be touched and Hirano hesitated for a moment before he patted him twice and withdrew his hand. “Okay let’s get you some late breakfast and start working on dinner.”
Cooking with Kagiura was so different from when he cooked by himself and Hirano really enjoyed that. Their schedules didn’t allow for much time to be this domestic and Hirano appreciated the holidays all the more whenever it was Kagiura’s birthday.
When Kagiura’s birthday approached the year they first met, Kagiura had commented that having his birthday on a holiday sometimes made it lonely. And after they started celebrating it together, Kagiura admitted his last birthdays had been his favorites ever and Hirano had been so embarrassed at the admission that he wanted to hide immediately. But he understood what Kagiura meant.
Once they finished cooking a few hours later, they were lounging on their couch with Kagiura’s head resting in Hirano’s lap, each of them doing their own thing on their phones.
“Oh!” Kagiura chirped out of nowhere and Hirano looked at him with his eyebrow raised. “Remember that show I went to in October?”
“The one that invited you to meet a pro basketball player?”
“Yes that one! Apparently the team of that player reached out to our agency to make a commercial and they invited me! They haven’t specified the details yet but Miyano learned about it today and told me to look forward to it.”
Hirano couldn’t help but smile because Kagiura’s excitement was contagious. He thought about Kagiura’s schedule in the upcoming months and quickly theorized where this commercial might slot for him.
“Do you think they are planning on using your solo debut for that?” Hirano guessed and Kagiura set down his phone on his chest and looked at Hirano like he told him the secrets of the universe.
Kagiura had been working so hard for the past years and everyone who met him mentioned how passionate he was about working as an idol that a lot of people had questioned why he hadn’t been granted a solo debut yet. He had the vocals for it, he had the performance and he definitely had a fanbase strong enough to financially justify it. Kagiura’s teammates and Hirano had been the biggest advocates for it for the longest time. Hirano wasn’t meaning to brag but being one of the highest earning producers in their roster, he had a way to sway the big shots of the agency into doing what he suggested. That’s how he had convinced everyone that they could merge two members of two different groups into a new one. It would be unprecedented, the fans would like it and the money he put behind it was a very risky bet but in the end, Kagiura and him had pulled it off.
“Well, I hope their request goes through and you can participate in their commercial, whatever it is,” Hirano said and ruffled Kagiura’s hair, receiving a hug around the waist in return.
“Time and again, I think you are my lucky charm, Hirano-san.” Kagiura's words were muffled by the press to his stomach, but Hirano’s heart skipped a beat at them and he felt his face heat up.
“I didn’t do anything though?”
“Yet. I know the moment we are allowed into the building again you’ll nicely ask to involve yourself into the project. Don’t think I don’t know you.” To punctuate his words, Kagiura poked Hirano in the chest.
“Once again, I am not your babysitter.”
“You say that but you will.” Kagiura closed his eyes and smiled, he looked so sure of it.
He was right, however.
Hirano often thought he was overbearing with Kagiura because he liked to involve himself as much as possible. A clear example had been when the agency started working on Kagiura’s solo album and Hirano had almost become possessive. He reluctantly allowed two other producers to join the project, even though he wasn’t the one to make final decisions. Kagiura was at the table to decide for himself who could join or couldn’t or if he wanted to experiment.
But Kagiura had reassured him that he liked to be looked after by Hirano alone.
“Just because you said it, I won’t do it anymore,” Hirano said, assuming an air of gravity, trying to look serious but despite that, Kagiura laughed
Their conversation flowed between work, things they saw on their phones and what to do during their break.
For the rest of the day, there was nothing left to do but pass the time. They watched overseas Christmas movies and did some cleaning around the apartment.
Close to midnight, their anticipation had won over; they sat down at their dinner table and started eating together, talking about trivial stuff and about the food.
They ate slowly, trying to stretch the time as much as possible. Hirano wasn’t the type to tap his foot around but this evening it was a close call. Their stubbornness for doing their gift exchange at midnight was something exciting most years, but this time it was making Hirano’s anticipation grow exponentially.
Hirano hoped that proposing on Christmas and on his partner’s birthday wasn’t a bad omen. He didn’t believe in them but a tiny part of him couldn’t help but fear. He reminded himself of Ichinose’s unwavering confidence that Kagiura was going to say yes, steeled himself one more time and looked at the clock.
December 25th
It had turned midnight and Hirano stood up and rounded the table to hug Kagiura from behind. From the new angle, he could see red on the tips of his ears and how he inhaled sharply with surprise.
“Happy Birthday, Akira,” Hirano whispered next to his ear, allowing himself to use his boyfriend’s first name that he reserved for intimate moments such as this. Their given names were their stage names and everyone called them that, their surnames ended up becoming the familiarity for them and given names were left for more reserved moments.
Feeling the warmth of Hirano’s words so close next to him made Kagiura cover his face with his hands.
“Stop teasing me, please.” When Kagiura finally uncovered his face he rested his hands on Hirano’s, his touch featherlight, as if afraid to shatter the moment. Smiling behind him, Hirano left a kiss on Kagiura’s cheek and straightened up. He offered his hand so Kagiura could stand with him.
“Shall we open our Christmas presents?” Hirano said and when Kagiura agreed, he immediately went to their bedroom. How did he manage to hide his gift in their shared room? Hirano had no idea, but he just chuckled and went to his studio to find his own.
Hirano could feel every cell in his body tingling with anticipation for Kagiura to open his gift. But he could wait. He had been waiting for months leading up to it since he started planning this proposal.
Hirano was aware that Kagiura had some idealistic visions about marriage thanks to his parents and his upbringing. After they started dating, Hirano noticed that Kagiura’s ideas of marriage were indeed idealistic but they were ideas he ended up agreeing with and started working towards them. Being family with Kagiura wouldn’t be so bad. Calling Kagiura his and being Kagiura’s sounded just right to him. Every part of him wanted to call Kagiura his husband more than anything.
He was setting his expectations too high and he didn’t have a single plan if he was rejected. He didn’t think it was possible but a tiny, nagging part of him kept him on his toes.
When they returned to their living room, they sat down on the rug in front of the Christmas tree, Kagiura in his usual seiza and Hirano cross-legged, with the ambiance of a playlist of foreign Christmas Carols playing in the background. Just like every year for their gift exchange. In these moments, they were just two men in love enjoying a holiday and birthday together, not globally known idols with demanding jobs whose lives were accessible for the public.
Hirano noticed Kagiura’s gaze at the big box, then also the smaller box he was holding and couldn’t hide the anticipation in his eyes, almost like a puppy staring at a treat and waiting patiently as much as possible to get it.
“Wanna go first?” Hirano said first before Kagiura could demand that Hirano give him his. He could already feel his face hurt a little from smiling so much.
Kagiura lit up and nodded. He pushed his box to Hirano and waited for him to open it.
“It was actually really hard to limit myself in budget for this year…” Kagiura said while Hirano carefully undid the wrapping. Kagiura did have a tendency to go for bigger budget gifts and Hirano could only assume it was because of his upbringing, which was then later made worse by his success as an idol.
Hirano didn’t know who looked more nervous between the two of them but at least his hands weren’t trembling with expectancy. He was already smiling and couldn’t stop but he felt like he smiled even wider once he opened the box and saw two Christmas sweaters in different sizes. They were simple but identical Christmas tree designs.
“I got us matching Christmas sweaters!” Kagiura proudly proclaimed and Hirano laughed, full of joy.
“I love them,” he said and gave Kagiura the smaller box, “but it seems we thought similarly once again.”
The confusion on Kagiura’s face was quickly replaced with a smile once he caught on Hirano’s meaning. He unwrapped the box neatly without breaking it but still unwrapping it quickly. When he saw it was also a Christmas sweater—although with a different design—he couldn’t help but laugh out loud too and Hirano joined him.
They laughed contentedly for a couple of minutes until they could catch their breath again. Once they settled down, Hirano changed his sitting position from cross-legged to seiza as well.
“For your birthday gift however… I might have gone all out.”
Hirano pushed the big box towards Kagiura, and sensing his seriousness about it, Kagiura was more careful in opening the box. Inside he found another box and Hirano really wanted to not laugh as he opened boxes to find more inside. Before he got to the final one, Kagiura looked at him like he just told the worst joke to be heard in history.
“Taiga-san, are you playing a prank on me?” He was short of whining and Hirano chuckled a bit.
“Sorry, sorry. That’s the last one, I promise.” Hirano schooled his expression back to look serious again and Kagiura sighed. He trusted Hirano and got back to fiddling with the last box.
Time seemed to slow down as Kagiura carefully took the last box out and opened it. Hirano’s breath got caught in his throat and he noticed he had started biting his lip a little too hard. But when Kagiura saw the ring, he stared at it for what felt like an eternity before he finally looked at Hirano with glassy eyes.
“Taiga-san, is this…?” His voice trembled and Hirano couldn’t hold it anymore, he bowed with his forehead on the floor, and despite his own voice feeling just as shaky, he asked what he had been waiting for for so long.
“Kagiura Akira, would you marry me?”
His eyes were closed and he could feel his heart beating faster than any time he felt before. He had served his heart on a silver plate. Except he trusted Kagiura too deeply to think he could hurt him but he couldn’t imagine his expression. When he heard a sniffle, he finally looked up and saw that Kagiura was crying.
He had never seen his boyfriend cry.
“T-this is not a dream, is it?” Kagiura sniffled again and Hirano immediately shortened the gap between them to wipe his tears away. He was awestruck. “Is-is this real?”
Hirano wiped more of Kagiura’s tears and softly cradled his cheek. Besides wanting for him to stop crying, a bigger part of him was screaming just how much he loved the person in front of him. Kagiura was holding the ring’s box so tightly in his hands, his knuckles going white from the tension, he looked insecure and Hirano wanted to fix that immediately.
“It’s real, I want to marry you. Just like every morning when we wake up together, it is real and I want it to be real forever. Just like the time we’ve spent together is real, I want it to keep going forever. Just like we are real, it’s real that I want to marry you.”
Kagiura nodded softly when Hirano started talking and by the time he was done, he was nodding intensely.
“Hirano Taiga, yes. Yes, I want to marry you. Yes, yes, yes. There is no other answer,” Kagiura said in a rushed way, stumbling over his own words and hid his face on Hirano’s shoulder. Hirano felt more tears roll down and land on his skin, but he really wanted to see him so he gently pulled Kagiura away and returned his hands to Kagiura’s cheeks.
“Will you stop your tears and show me your smile instead?”
As soon as Hirano said it, Kagiura grinned from ear to ear, effortlessly and with teeth showing. Hirano felt like he was holding the sun in his hands and he closed the gap to kiss him. He felt so giddy he couldn’t help but smile into the kiss when Kagiura returned the kiss with vigor.
The relief he felt was immense, but it couldn’t compare to the happiness that was enveloping him. Kagiura was embracing him so tightly too, like he couldn’t bear the thought of being away.
“Hirano-san… Taiga-san, you will never top this birthday gift, you know that?” Kagiura said and Hirano could finally hear the laughter in his partner’s voice.
“If it means I get to stay for the rest of our lives, I am fine with never topping this one.”
They stayed as they were, embracing each other for a while and Hirano couldn’t tell whose heart was beating the fastest. His own face felt on fire, his face muscles aching from smiling so much but he felt so content.
“I want to get married right now,” Kagiura said suddenly and Hirano laughed again.
“Let’s wait a bit, okay? There are a lot of things we need to take care of first.” He understood Kagiura’s feeling on the matter but deep in his heart he wanted a proper wedding, elopement wasn’t an option. The legality of it and the possible leakage of the matter needed to be properly discussed as well.
Hirano wasn’t going to risk his beloved falling into the hands of evil people.
“With you next to me, there’s nothing we can’t solve.” As if reading Hirano’s mind, Kagiura replied to him.
With that reassurance, he could enjoy the rest of his holiday break in sweet bliss.