Work Text:
2am in some Hollywood nightclub that Billy can't remember agreeing to go to. Dancefloor jam-packed with club kids.
A scuzzy synth riff is crawling out of the speakers, dragging out slower and slower. Then it fades, and a voice Billy recognizes fills the room.
"Of course I'm not over it. I mean, Jesus Christ."
It's Joe.
Billy quakes.
"YOU TOLD ME THAT THIS WASN'T FUCKING SPIKED!" Billy screams at Janice from publishing, who dragged him out for drinks and a little socializing. She just stares back at him, baffled and a little scared. Billy realizes that he's thrown his martini glass on the floor, and one of his hands is clutching her shoulder.
I'm losing it, Billy thinks. John, Joe, now me — soon Pipe Fitter is gonna start losing his marbles. Curse of Hard Core Logo.
He hears it again.
"Of course I'm not over it," Joe says, and this time there's a little electronic shimmer on the last word. "Of course I don't forgive you. I still love - I still love - lo-lo-lo-love-"
A blast of drum and bass interrupts.
Billy makes a break for the smoking area.
The record label fax him the details within a few days. "I Still Love You" is a limited edition white label release from a Toronto electronic music collective called Yeast Infection. They even get him their phone number.
He rings at 7am Toronto time and is surprised that anyone answers.
Yeast Infection turns out to be two chicks called Gina and Dee Dee. He gets Gina first, but Dee Dee comes home from work halfway through the call.
"I did an oral history interview with Joe for my MFA thesis," Gina says. Billy's mind boggles at this. "Then I asked him if I could sample from it, and he said it was fine by him."
"He was probably drunk!" Billy shouts, even though you would never be able to ask Joe anything if you waited for him to be sober and clear-minded first.
Billy tells them that he is the sole rights holder for anything written or released by Joe, and nothing can be released without his consent.
Yeast Infection tell him that Joe had already signed a release and agreed to have his voice used on the record by the time he died.
"We sent him a test pressing," Gina says. "We can send you a test pressing if you want."
"I don't want a test pressing!" Billy says, "I want you to destroy this fucking record!"
"All the copies have already been sent out to DJs," Dee Dee says. "We couldn't stop the record if we wanted to. What the fuck is your problem, anyway?"
"I'll sue!" He threatens them. "I'll sue you both!"
But his voice sounds pathetic and weak and they just laugh at him down the phone like infernal baboons.
Then they hang up.
Billy throws the phone down and puts his head in his hands.
CANADIAN HARDCORE PUNK ORAL HISTORY PROJECT: Joe Dick, 1993.
00:54:21
Interviewer: What would you tell Billy if you could talk to him?
JD: I can talk to him if I want, he just doesn't listen.
JD: I would tell him that I don't forgive him.
Interviewer: You're not over it?
JD: Of course I'm not over it. I mean, Jesus Christ. Hard Core Logo was the only thing we had and Billy was the only thing I had. He threw us away.
JD: I would tell him this. Billy, I'm not over it. I can't forgive. But I still love you.