Work Text:
Tommy gets his dream promotion two days after Buck’s absolute disaster of a hookup with him.
It’s so stupid, how affected Buck is opening Instagram to be greeted with his ex’s smiling face, with a too-long caption waxing poetic about patience, and hard work, how grateful he is for the universe bringing him this gift just when he needed it, as a confirmation that it was the right choice to get rid of the negative, indecisive energy in his life.
Buck scowls at the screen as he hits block with completely useless extra force. Unfortunately, pressing on a touch screen pales in comparison to the real door Tommy slammed behind himself on his way out.
Okay, so: sleeping with his ex was stupid. It was a moment of weakness. One he will not be repeating anytime soon. The sex was great, but everything that followed… He’s learned his lesson, the past should stay in the past.
It does offer him some perspective, though. As much as he hates to admit it, he is lonely. Losing his boyfriend and best friend in such quick succession has left this massive gap in his social circle, one that is not so easily filled by just any co-worker he can grab.
One night with Tommy, and momentarily, the restless loneliness that’s been making him unable to sleep in his new house went away. He’s missing connection. So, while he can’t replace Eddie, and he’s swearing off any more trips down memory lane, maybe he’s still found a temporary solution.
Jumping back onto the apps, and into strangers' beds doesn’t sound so bad anymore.
*
“Mm, that was great,” Amanda says, pulling Buck back up for a lazy kiss.
It was, he thinks, kissing back, slipping some tongue. He’d be content to lay here for another hour, slowly making out, unhurried until they’re ready to go again.
That thought vanishes with three consecutive pings from her phone. She groans, rolling out from under Buck when it goes off another two times.
“Someone’s popular,” Buck jokes.
“God, it’s my boss,” she says, groaning.
“Perfect, that means you can ignore it.” Buck is already pulling her back, kissing the back of her neck.
“No, I…” she sighs, as he bites playfully at her earlobe. She laughs, rolling her shoulders as if she’s trying to shrug him off. “She wouldn’t be messaging unless it was important. Just let me…” she trails off, concentrating on the phone in her hand. Buck feels the moment her entire body goes stiff, and then a moment later, she bolts up in bed.
“Holy shit,” she exclaims, eyes wide.
“That bad?”
“No, total opposite, it’s fucking fantastic!” She’s beaming, thumbs flying across her phone screen as she types back a surely enthusiastic response. It takes a moment for her to provide more context. “We just got our grant approved! I’ve been working on this for years, it’s basically my whole life at this point.”
“Oh, shit, congrats! We should celebrate,” Buck says, waggling his eyebrows, but it falls on deaf ears.
“Yeah, yeah,” she says, distracted. “In a sec.”
Buck doesn’t stay long after that, collecting his clothes from the floor as she calls another coworker and makes plans to go out for drinks. Buck waves goodbye on his way out, but he doesn’t think she even notices.
He doesn’t blame her, but he does get home a lot earlier than he was expecting.
*
“My house is trying to kill me,” is the first thing Buck hears the next morning, when he answers his phone.
“What?” he asks through a yawn. Buck hopes Eddie isn’t in any actual life-threatening situations. He barely has his bearings yet, only woken up about thirty seconds ago by the buzzing on his nightstand.
“I opened my bedroom door, and it pulled right off the hinges, and crashed down on me. That wasn’t too bad. Knocked my forehead, but I just propped the door against the wall and moved on. But then my hall light almost electrocuted me, and my toaster caught on fire. All within an hour.”
“Shit,” Buck says, as he sits up in bed, rubbing the sleep from his eyes, “that’s not good.”
“Yeah, no shit.” Eddie sighs, so deep and tired Buck can feel it eight hundred miles away. “Did I make a huge mistake, coming back here? Christopher still barely talks to me.”
That wakes Buck up. “No, hey—” he rushes out, “You did exactly what you needed to. Come on, you know that. Okay, maybe the house was a mistake,” Buck adds, earning him Eddie’s warm laugh loud in his ear. Buck smiles along to the sound. It’s exactly what he was hoping for, to give Eddie some small relief from his misery this morning. “But, everything else? None of that is a mistake.”
Eddie sighs again, but this time, it sounds lighter. “You’re right. I’m just feeling sorry for myself today. Thanks for letting me vent.”
“Of course,” Buck says, before launching into a story about a ridiculous call the 118 had. He’s trying to distract Eddie. If Buck could take away any of his pain and worries, and carry them for him instead, Buck would in a heartbeat. But at least he can do this.
*
The shrill ringing of a phone drowns out Oscar’s moans. Buck was still chasing after his own release, and wasn’t planning on letting it ruin his momentum, until he heard, “Wait, wait! Stop, I have to get that.” Buck quickly pulls out, flopping down on the bed as Oscar scrambles out of it, heading towards his still ringing phone that was abandoned on the kitchen counter when they had arrived.
Like Buck’s old loft, Oscar’s apartment is an open concept bachelor pad. Buck is able to watch everything from his place on the bed, even though it’s immediately clear this should be a more private moment. Only a few moments ago, Oscar was lax and pliant under Buck, riding out his orgasm. Now, his entire body has changed. He’s tense and hunched over. His hand is curled around the phone so tightly that his knuckles are white. “Hello?” There’s a long beat of silence, and then he lets out a sob. “Are you sure? Oh my god, I’ll be—I’ll be right there—I’m leaving now. Thank you, thank you!”
When he turns towards Buck again after hanging up, there are still tears in his eyes, but he’s also smiling bright, looking dazed. “Uh,” Buck says, not quite sure what to say. “Are—are you okay?”
He startles, like he’s only just remembered Buck’s still here. He sniffs, smile blooming even wider. “Yeah, that was my mom’s ringtone. My…my brother, he was in the hospital. It was touch and go for a few weeks, but he’s—he’s awake now. They didn’t think it would happen. It feels like a miracle!”
“That’s—that’s amazing!”
“Yeah, I—” he cuts himself off, a relieved laugh bubbling up. “So, um—I hate to fuck and kick you out, but—”
“No, obviously, I’ll get out of your hair, man.” Buck quickly gathers his stuff and heads out with a small wave. He can’t even be upset he didn’t get to come, when he kind of witnessed a quote, unquote, miracle.
The feeling stays with him, all through his drive home, until he gets a call from Eddie just as he’s walking in the door. It’s like a bucket of cold water. “A hiring freeze?” Buck all but squawks.
“Yup,” Eddie confirms. He’s slumped in his kitchen, so small on Buck’s phone screen. His eyes stare past the camera, vacantly.
It twists Buck’s stomach in knots, seeing him like this. “Have you tried other—”
“It’s across the whole district. Plus, this was the only house that even had an opening right now.” He shakes his head, biting his lip. “I don’t know what I'm gonna do. I need a job.”
“Fuck.” Buck wants to leap through the phone screen and wrap Eddie in his arms. He wants to—to do something, like march into the El Paso fire department and make them fix it, tell them what a huge mistake they’re making, and overturn a fucking district-wide budget. But he can’t do that, because he’s useless, two states away. Instead, he does the only thing he can, and listens to Eddie vent, and then helps him with an Uber application.
It’s such a contrast to the elation that had been coursing through him earlier in the night. It wasn’t even his celebration to have, but being so close to something like that, and then chasing it with Eddie’s news… It’s not fair, but, it does make Buck think. Twice now, in the last week, he’s been able to witness these small miracles touch the lives of strangers he’s touched. It’s a weird coincidence, that, he’s sure, he’s overthinking, but right now, listening to Eddie’s sigh, he can’t shake it. He feels desperate, but—if it wasn’t a coincidence, maybe… maybe it’s something in him. And maybe he could actually use it to help.
He never did get off after leaving Oscar’s, he realizes after he hangs up with Eddie. He still has an undercurrent of arousal in his gut, making him restless. And with that on top of everything with Eddie, it makes him… curious. Maybe if he could—transfer some of that good luck, by concentrating on where it should go instead. If he takes care of himself now, and just thinks really, really hard, maybe it can go to Eddie.
Buck lays himself out on his bed, shoving a hand in his boxers. He closes his eyes and lets himself think about every forbidden, locked-away thought about his best friend.
The way his ass looks in his work pants. And his jeans. And his other jeans. And those old shorts he works out in sometimes, that are a little shorter than he normally wears. A whole slideshow of Eddie bending over. How his undershirt clings to him with sweat after a long, hard shift. His smile, and the way his face pinks up so easily, so sweetly, and his canines that poke out, just so, that Buck would love to feel sinking into his skin—
His release hits him all at once, almost taking him by surprise, better than anything else he’d had this past month. He lays there afterward, starfished on the bed waiting for his heart rate to come down. Once it returns to normal, he can too. He can lock all those thoughts back up, where he’ll never touch them again.
He wipes his hand on the sheets he’ll be washing anyway, blood rushing in his ears. This wasn’t for him. It was for Eddie. He won’t feel guilt about it.
It doesn’t end up working, regardless. Eddie still ends his first shift as an Uber driver with a one-star rating, and Buck screams as loud as he can into his palms.
*
Even after his theory didn’t work out, he still can’t shake the idea that something is happening. It feels almost too coincidental that two people immediately got the life-changing news right after having sex with him. Buck knows he’s drawn to finding meaning in things more than some of the people he surrounds himself with, but…it’s just strange. It sticks with him, a feeling that there is something to it.
The third time it happens, that feeling solidifies.
He went down on Tabitha for what felt like hours, wringing as many orgasms out of her as he could, rutting against her bedsheets to get himself off in the process. He loved doing this, but there was also an itch at the back of his mind, like he had something to prove. A theory to test. It spurred him on even more than usual. By the end, when her legs were shaking, too exhausted and oversensitive to go any more, she had tugged on his hair, finally pulling him away.
He made his way to her kitchen, getting himself a glass of water while she recovered. He counted down the seconds while he downed the glass, anxious for what would be waiting for him when he got back in the room. When he does return, she has a piece of paper in one hand, and her phone in the other, eyes wide with shock. “Oh my God,” she whispers quietly to herself, before repeating it louder, eyes growing wider.
Buck tosses himself back on the bed, placing a hand on her thigh, trying to get her attention. “You good?”
“Oh my God,” is all she says again, turning to Buck, a huge smile taking over her face, eyes welling up. It’s become an eerily familiar expression in this situation for Buck.
He searches for some levity to calm the unease he’s feeling. “What, did you, uh, did you win the lottery, or something?’ Buck jokes, and immediately, immediately knows with certainty that it’s happening again.
“Yes!” she bursts, hand flying to her face, as she shakes with giddy excitement. “Oh my God, I just won two million dollars? What the fuck!”
“Wow,” Buck says, trying to sound genuine and not freaked out. “Congrats,” he adds, lamely.
“I know it’s not something I can retire off of, but I can pay off my loans! I can have real savings!” She starts typing away on her phone, probably telling her friends and family, paying no mind to Buck anymore. Not that he blames her, of course. She just got the best news of her life, he’s not needed here anymore.
He gets dressed quietly, slipping out the door with a quick wave goodbye.
After that, it’s kind of hard to ignore. Twice is a coincidence, but three times is pure fact, or whatever the saying is. In retrospect, even Tommy had some good news after their night together. Buck has a magic dick. One night with him, and your life is fixed. Your dreams come true. It sounds like the worst line in existence, but the proof is there.
He doesn’t really know what to do with that.
With great power, comes great responsibility. Somehow, he has the ability to make real, positive change in people's lives. But should he?
On the one hand, it’s all been positive change. He’s doing good, bringing good cheer wherever he— you know. So, is there any harm in it? Or, going even further, does he have a moral obligation to keep fucking, spreading good luck like an STI?
Buck would love to get a second opinion on his options, but he’s also pretty sure no one would believe him. Bobby would be wary, and disappointed about all the uncommitted sex he’s having, honestly. Hen and Chimney would never let him hear the end of it, and Eddie—has enough on his plate.
And that makes it even worse. As much as Buck is happy to provide these small miracles to people, it’s… unfair that the one person who deserves it the most, that he wants to help, he can’t. Eddie’s had the worst year of his life, and Buck has had to stand on the sidelines watching it play out, unable to do anything useful. And then the universe gives him this gift to help people, except the only people that benefit are strangers.
He just wants so badly to be able to send some of this… good luck, magic, whatever it is, to Eddie. But he doesn’t know how, when the one way he thought could, didn’t work at all. It’s like the universe is mocking him.
He’s suddenly desperate to hear from Eddie, to learn that something, anything has gone his way lately, before he needs to start considering even more drastic measures.
“Hey!” Buck greets as soon as Eddie’s face pops up on screen. He puts on his brightest smile, naively hoping he’ll see it mirrored on Eddie. “How’s everything?”
It’s good, it’s great, things are so much better, he chants in his head. There’s been a turning point, things are finally looking up.
“Really?” Eddie gives him an unimpressed look. “How do you think?”
Buck refuses to let his smile falter. “Seriously, tell me something good. We can’t keep focusing on the negative, right? That can’t be good for us. What’s one good thing that’s happened recently? Anything.” he doesn’t care if he sounds a little desperate at the end.
Eddie snorts. “Got some bread on sale yesterday.”
Buck blinks, stuck waiting for more, but it doesn’t come. “That’s… that’s it?”
Eddie sighs, looking away for a moment, before turning back to his phone with a placating shrug. “I don’t know what you want me to say, Buck. It sucks, but I got myself into this mess. So, it’s my own fault. At least I’m here with my son, right? Even if he barely cares, and my mom is hovering every second. And my house is a money pit, and I have barely any income. But I’m here, and I’m with him. That’s something good, right?”
“Yeah,” Buck says, tongue heavy in his mouth. “That’s—that’s good.” It’s all he can manage to say, his words failing him. Buck's always stumbled around expressing himself with them. Actions have been his specialty, but the distance between them undermines that too. “I just wish there was something I could do.”
Eddie sighs. “Don’t worry about it, man. I’ll get through.”
It eats at Buck long after their conversation is over.
Maybe there is something Buck could do. It’s not fair that the only people benefiting from his new powers are strangers, rather than people he cares about. Rather than Eddie, his best friend, who is going through maybe the worst year of his whole life. Buck has this crazy, unexplainable phenomenon dropped into his lap, and he can’t use it to help him, just because Eddie’s straight?
No. Buck can’t accept that. He won’t accept that. He has the opportunity to fix Eddie’s life, or at least make part of it better and easier for him. He can’t just ignore it, no matter how weird it might be. He has a moral obligation to help him, even if it’s through unconventional means.
He doesn’t know much about these new powers, but—clearly, just thinking strong thoughts doesn’t work. He has to be there, and touch the person, and probably make them come. He would never leave anyone hanging, anyways, but that’s probably an important part. Whereas his own orgasm doesn’t seem to matter; Buck never finished with Oscar, but he still got his good news.
So, theoretically, he could just… get Eddie off. It only needs to be once. And it doesn’t need to be reciprocated. And then his luck will turn.
Eddie is straight but… he can figure that out. Buck throws a few clothes in a backpack, and grabs his keys. He's got a twelve-hour lonely drive to think of a game plan.
*
Buck chugs his fourth energy drink, tossing it over his shoulder to meet the others on the floor in his back seat. “Eddie,” he says, alone in his car, testing it out. He clears his throat, lowering his voice this time, trying to rid all of the nerves from his voice. He’s keepin’ it cool and relaxed. “Eddie, I’m here to suck your dick, bro.” He lets out a low, frustrated groan. If he didn’t have to keep his eyes on the road, he’d be banging his head against the steering wheel right about now. “And then he’ll slam the door in my face, because I’m a fucking creep. Excellent.”
He’s been at this for the last hundred miles, trying to figure out how the hell he’s going to do this. He’s really only landed on the sex act itself. Buck’s confident with his mouth, and a blowjob seems like the safest option for a straight man like Eddie. He’s trying to cross as few boundaries as possible, but he still really needs to make Eddie come for this to work.
“Eddie,” he tries again, “I can fix your whole life, but I just need to put my mouth on your dick first, I promise I’m not a creep! Oh, so you never wanna speak to me again? Great!”
Buck’s heart hammers with every mile that ticks by, every second he’s closer to El Paso. Eddie’s never going to believe him, he doesn’t know why he’s bothering trying to explain. But maybe he doesn’t have to explain. Because Eddie knows him, and he… he knows Buck only has his best interests at heart.
“Eddie,” he tries again, “You trust me, right?”
*
The door opens, and Eddie stands before him in loose sweatpants, an old LAFD tee, and wide eyes. “Buck?”
“Hey,” Buck greets, shifting his weight from foot to foot. The reality of what he came here to do is rapidly crashing down on him.
“What are you doing here?” Eddie asks, but still steps aside easily, opening his home to Buck like it’s second nature.
“Oh, you know,” Buck shrugs, aiming for casual, probably missing by a mile. “Was in the neighborhood.” Buck surveys the house as he walks in. It’s strange, to see all of Eddie’s belongings, things that Buck has associated with comfort and steadiness over the years, in an unfamiliar place. A place that looks like it hasn’t seen much love and care at all. “Your place is nice,” he lies, anyways.
“It’s not and you know it.” The door shuts behind Eddie with a dull thud. He stands in front of it with his hands on his hips, eyes boring into Buck. “What are you doing here, Buck?” he repeats, exasperated.
“I… had a few days off, and I needed to see you.” None of that is untrue, he’s just leaving some information out. “I missed you,” he adds, because he can’t stop himself.
Eddie sags, with an almost wistful smile. “I missed you too. You could’ve told me you wanted to visit.”
“Yeah, well…” Buck’s chest tightens. He never had to do that before. He could just show up at Eddie’s whenever he wanted. He never had to say why. Or even think about it. He never had to miss Eddie—or, he always did, always wanted more, but he could just take it. But it’s different now. He can’t just show up unannounced, without putting that into focus, because now he’s driving to a whole other state.
Buck takes a breath, trying to shake himself out of the heartache that came on. That’s not why he’s here. If he does this right, maybe neither of them will ever have to feel like this again. He needs to get back on track.
“Eddie,” he keeps his voice even, just like he practiced. “Do you trust me?”
Eddie tilts his head, brow bunched up in confusion, “Obviously,” Eddie says, like Buck asked a stupid question. Maybe he did, but he needs to hear it. Before anything happens. “But what does—”
Buck cuts him off. “Just—just sit down, okay? If you trust me, just sit down, and let me do this, okay?”
Eddie opens his mouth to protest, but then shuts it. Sighing, he takes a seat on the couch, gesturing at Buck as if to say, ‘happy now?’
Buck takes a steadying breath. He’s doing this. They’re doing this. “All you have to do is trust me, okay? Just trust me,” he repeats again before sinking to his knees right in front of Eddie.
Eddie lets out an involuntary yelp, jumping a little when Buck reaches for his waistband, but, amazingly, he doesn’t put a stop to it. Buck tugs his sweats down, along with his briefs, just enough to get him free. He hears Eddie’s ragged breathing above him as he takes his cock in hand, angling it towards him. He’s soft still, but not completely. Feeling it twitch, starting to swell right in his hand is maybe the most surreal experience Buck’s ever had. But he’s about to top that, too, he thinks, as he noses closer to Eddie’s crotch. He stays like that, a hairsbreadth away from Eddie’s cock, just breathing over it, for a few seconds. One last chance for Eddie to put a stop to it, if it’s too much. If he can’t stomach it.
But he doesn’t. Buck chances a quick glance above to see Eddie biting his lip, with his eyes screwed shut. He’s tense all over, hands balled into fists on his thighs. If this was anything close to a normal hook-up, Buck would tell him he doesn’t need to hold back, he could put his hands on Buck. As it is, he doesn’t want to make it weirder for Eddie than he has to.
Satisfied that Eddie isn’t pushing him away, Buck doesn’t hesitate any longer, and takes Eddie into his mouth.
He pulls out all the stops, utilizing all the skills he has. If he’s doing this, just once, he’s gonna make it the very best experience he can for Eddie. And Eddie, shockingly, lets him know that he’s doing just that.
Eddie is loud. It’s not what he was expecting; he figured Eddie would be the kinda guy to bite his lip, and hold any sound in. Instead, he’s moaning and babbling nonsense above Buck, things that Buck will never forget, possibly the hottest sounds he’s ever heard. It spurs him on, taking Eddie deeper, until he’s moaning Buck’s name too. It sends a shockwave through Buck, so unexpected and undeniable that Eddie’s not imagining someone else. It’s so fucking kind of him, staying present, here in this room, rather than floating away in some fantasy. He’s not grinning and bearing it, he’s enjoying himself, and enjoying Buck taking him apart.
Far too quickly, Eddie is gasping out, “I’m—fuck, I’m—” He hurriedly shakes Buck’s shoulder, as if trying to shove him off, as if Buck would ever pull off when Eddie’s about to—
The grip on Buck’s shoulder stiffens, nails digging in as Eddie suddenly stills, letting out a loud moan above, and then warm cum floods Buck’s mouth.
Buck tucks Eddie back into his pants once he’s finished, returning everything to how it was before, like it never happened. All the evidence has been swallowed anyways.
“Okay,” Buck says, wiping his mouth as he stands up. He shouldn’t linger, make this any more weird for Eddie. “Do you have your phone nearby?”
Eddie grunts from the couch, where he’s slouched back, arm thrown over his face, still breathing heavily. But he’s smiling, all tension gone from his body. Buck almost doesn’t want to pull him out of the afterglow, but… he doesn’t want to forget himself either. This was for a purpose.
“Come on, your phone. Where is it?”
“Just—just give me a second, man. I’m trying to…” Eddie moves his arm then, making eye contact for the first time since Buck got on his knees. His face is still beautifully red, and Buck can’t help but wonder how far down the flush goes. “Phone? What are you talking about?” he asks, voice slow and syrupy. Buck will pat himself on the back for that later. Eddie wets his lips, looking Buck up and down. “C’mere,” Eddie slurs, patting the spot on the couch next to him.
He’s still looking at Buck all dopey and pleased. He’s a cuddler after an orgasm, it seems. Buck shouldn’t know that. He stays where he is, shifting his weight. He tries to look away from Eddie, but all that gets him is another “C’mere,” more insistent, even a little whiny, this time. Eddie bites his lip, smile turning sheepish and unsure as he looks pointedly lower. Buck becomes aware, for the first time, that he’s hard, and Eddie has clearly noticed.
Quickly, he shifts, trying to conceal himself or something, which is probably fucking impossible, Buck realizes, because Eddie on the couch is at fucking crotch level, and Buck is just practically shoving it in his fucking face and—
Buck shakes his head, stumbling out, “No—no, man. I’m good. This was just for you. I should…” Buck swallows hard, trying to get his body under control and his brain to catch up. “I should go.”
“What?”
“Yeah, I should probably go.”
“You’re leaving?” Eddie pouts, his big, shining brown eyes staring up at Buck.
Buck is a weak, weak man, wanting to cave instantly, and give Eddie anything he wants, but—he can’t. It takes all of his willpower to step back. Eddie’s not thinking right. Buck’s got him all confused, drunk off a good orgasm. Staying would just make it worse.
“Yeah, I’ll get out of your hair.”
Eddie is slow to respond, still struggling to get out of his daze. Buck is ashamed to say he takes advantage of it, making his way to the door by the time Eddie’s brows knit together. “Wait—” he hears as the door shuts behind him, but he forces himself to keep moving, pulling himself into his truck.
As Buck turns the key in the ignition, he catches the time on the dashboard. He can’t help the hysterical laugh that bubbles up. Twelve hours to drive to El Paso, all for about ten minutes in Eddie’s house.
Buck hopes desperately that he wasn’t wrong. That those ten minutes will be worth it.
That he didn’t just blow up the friendship he already felt slipping through his fingers because of the distance.
Buck shakes his head. He can’t think that way. He pulls out of the driveway, and asks Siri to find him a hotel.
He should leave-leave, get out of El Paso entirely, and start the long drive back to LA. That would be the smart thing to do; give Eddie as much space as he can, and put this behind them until it’s forgotten. But—
He can’t stop himself from thinking—hoping—that maybe whatever good news Eddie ends up getting, it will finally bring him back home. And if that’s the case, Buck might as well stick around to bring Eddie, and Christopher, home himself.
*
He doesn’t hear from Eddie for the rest of the night. Not that it’s that surprising, he’s probably busy getting his life back together, maybe celebrating with Christopher, whatever it is. He refreshes Facebook and Instagram obsessively anyway, even though he knows Eddie barely posts. But just in case.
Obviously, there’s nothing, and Buck just has to sit and wait, anxiously, for Eddie to reach out and tell him. That doesn’t happen until almost noon the next day.
Buck almost falls out of the bed when his phone finally buzzes on the nightstand. He knows this one has to be Eddie. He set everything and everyone else to Do Not Disturb after too many near heart attacks caused by push notifications from useless apps, and the 118 group chat.
He takes a deep breath before picking up his phone and reading the one, lone text.
why did you leave?
For all the possibilities he’s prepared himself for, Buck doesn’t know what to make of that. He left so that the whole thing could be easily swept under the rug as soon as Eddie got whatever good news was coming to him. A small, embarrassing sacrifice for a better life for Eddie.
Did it not work? Dread creeps up his spine as that thought sinks in. If it didn’t work, he might’ve made Eddie uncomfortable for no reason. He might’ve made things even worse. Pushed Eddie from ever coming back—
No. He’s not going to spiral. He’s going to figure out what exactly happened first, and then he can deal with the fallout.
Didn’t want to make things weird for you lol, Buck types with shaking hands. Did anything else happen last night? With Christopher, or your parents? Maybe that firefighting job you wanted?
nah, my night was pretty quiet after my best friend jumped me then bolted. weirdest rejection of my life
Buck’s stomach sinks. Nothing happened. Nothing happened after Buck did his part, and all Eddie’s been left with is—is confusion and, worse, somehow rejection. It’s the last thing he wants Eddie to feel, he was trying to help, not add to his problem.
He grabs his keys and is on his way back to Eddie’s in seconds.
*
“I fucked up,” Buck says the moment the door swings open.
Eddie doesn’t look impressed, arms crossed as he leans against the doorframe, blocking Buck from entering. It hurts, but it’s deserved. Buck is almost ready to beg, the hopelessness sinking into him, when, Eddie juts out his chin, with the smallest nod, as if saying, go on. Buck exhales, grateful he didn’t blow it completely. He still has one chance, he’ll make it count, and come clean.
“I was trying to help, I wanted to help you,” Buck says, nodding, pleading. “But I did it wrong. And I’m sorry.”
The corner of Eddie’s mouth twitches, and then, all at once, he’s stepping aside, letting Buck through the door. “It’s a good start, but keep going,” Eddie deadpans, with a hint of a smile.
Buck laughs helplessly, relief washing over him. “I—Okay. God, this is gonna sound crazy,” he starts. Eddie raises an eyebrow, but doesn’t say anything. Buck lets out another laugh, a mix of emotions bubbling up within him. Giddiness still, at just getting in the door, nerves that it could all still go wrong. And the ridiculousness of the entire situation. Eddie’s never going to believe him, but he doesn’t have any other plan. He might as well just rip off the band-aid. “I think my dick is good luck.”
Eddie stares at him, blinking. “What?”
“Or—not just my dick—um, sex, in general. It’s like a good luck charm. I, uh—” Buck puts a big smile on his face. “—bring good fortune to people after an orgasm. I don’t really get it, fully, but—”
“Sorry,” Eddie cuts him off, with a scoff, “are you trying to say you blew me to give me good luck?”
“I—yeah. I mean, you were—every time we talked, you were…you were struggling, and—and I had this way to help—”
“What the fuck.”
“—And I should’ve told you, but—I knew you wouldn’t believe it, and I thought—I thought maybe it would be less weird, if—if I just did it. And then everything would be fixed, and you’d forget about it—”
“I’d forget? Jesus Christ,” Eddie says, pinching the bridge of his nose. “So, this is, like, the definition of a pity fuck. Right. Of course you wanted to get out of here as quickly as you could.”
“Whoa, no. No, that is not—it wasn’t pity. It was me taking care of my best friend.”
Eddie’s jaw clenches. “Is that all it meant to you?” he asks.
“Of course!” Buck blurts. Eddie probably has the wrong idea, that—the same thing Tommy and Maddie— Buck scrambles, his pulse racing as he tries desperately to correct Eddie’s assumption. “Obviously. I’m not—I wouldn’t—I was just being a good friend, Eddie. I promise. It was just friendly. Friend stuff. I’m not—” he cuts himself off, unable to actually say it to Eddie. “Is that—what did you think it was?”
None of the tension leaves Eddie, though, body still held taut and stiff. “Uh, yeah, I had, uh, stupidly thought it meant something, I guess. I thought it was your way of, uh—I just thought it meant something. And things were finally… and I thought it was the same for you.” His voice breaks, and Eddie pauses, swallowing thickly. Buck’s pretty sure he’s stopped breathing, the Earth’s stopped spinning, he doesn’t know what’s happening, but it’s all wrong. It can’t be real.
Eddie looks away from Buck, sniffing. “But that was clearly stupid. That’s just me. Sorry, I guess I’m immune to your new powers, or whatever. This was a waste of your time. My life is just one big hilarious joke after another.”
“Eddie, what—” Buck takes a step closer, instinctively, “What do you mean? You’re… you’re straight,”
Eddie lets out a humorless laugh. “I came with your mouth on my dick. So…” He shrugs halfheartedly, like he’s too tired for even that. “I don’t think so.”
“Oh. That—that doesn’t mean anything.” Buck shakes his head, relief flooding through him, as the world rights itself. This he can fix. “A mouth is a mouth. I decided to blow you so it would be as easy as possible for you. Oh my God, you—you got a little confused after a good orgasm, it happens to the best of us. But you’re totally fine, it doesn’t count.”
“Buck,” Eddie stares him right in the eye. “It counts. That was the best sex I’ve ever had.”
“Yeah, well,” Buck laughs, scratching the back of his neck, trying not to sound too smug. “I think that’s just a testament to my skills.”
Eddie rolls his eyes. “That’s not what I meant. Your skills are fine, but that’s not why—”
Buck scoffs. “That was better than fine.”
“I’m sure I’ve had technically better blowjobs in my life—”
“No you haven’t,” Buck throws back immediately. It’s absurd. A blatant lie. But the need to know gnaws at him. Before he can stop himself he keeps talking, jabbing back, “From who? The school teacher or the nun?”
“Oh, fuck off,” Eddie says, but there’s no heat behind it. Instead, the corner of his mouth twitches, like he’s holding back a laugh. “It was, like, thirty seconds, that’s no real test of skill.”
“And whose fault was that? If anything, that's proof enough.”
Eddie huffs, hands on his hips. His smile has dropped again. “Do you want me to be straight?”
“What?”
“You’re finding every argument you can to say I'm not gay, so—so what else am I supposed to think? Do you want me to be straight?”
Buck blinks, taken aback. Yes, isn’t the right answer, obviously. But… he can’t say no. He can’t want him to not be straight, either. That’s not something he can ask for. It’s not even in the realm of being allowed. If it was even possible, that would… that would—
He stops that train of thought in its tracks. “I don’t want you to be anything. I just—want you to be you.”
“Okay, well,” Eddie says, throwing his hands up. “I’m probably not straight.”
Buck opens his mouth to say… something. He’s not even sure yet. But Eddie beats him to it. “No,” he says with a stern finger pointed at Buck. “You don’t get to say anything anymore. I’m redacting the probably. I’m just not. And it’s not because of your skills, or—anything like that. It just—makes a lot of things make sense, okay? Maybe it was a bit easier to land there because it was you, because you’re… safe. But, just because you don’t—that doesn’t actually change it for me, okay?”
“Oh.” It’s all Buck can manage while his brain is short-circuiting, but he feels his mouth moving again despite himself, “I don’t…you think I don’t—what?”
Eddie smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “It’s fine.”
“No, the fuck it’s not.” Buck’s voice shakes when he asks, “What don’t I?”
“I know you came here to fix things for me, but you don’t need to love me out of some sense of obligation—”
“What?” Buck says again, on repeat, like it’s the only word he knows. Maddie and Tommy’s accusation flashed in front of his eyes all over again, but here Eddie is, saying the opposite, agreeing with what Buck had desperately convinced himself was the truth; he’s not in love with Eddie. Except hearing it from Eddie himself, it’s never sounded more untrue. “But I do,” he rasps out, small and pathetic, and not any sort of declaration Eddie deserves.
“Yeah, as a friend, and I’m grateful—”
“No,” Buck says with as much insistence as he can, “as—as everything, anything. You’re everything. Of course I’m… of course I’m in love with you. I, um, think it was really obvious too. I just didn’t want to think about it when—” He cuts himself off, taking a deep breath. The truth he’s been in denial about is swelling up inside of him all at once, and it’s terrifying and overwhelming, but Eddie’s right there, with something like hope in his eyes. It gives Buck the push he needs. “If you were straight, it would be embarrassing and pathetic and something I’d never get over. So I just refused to look at it. Saying I wasn’t, over and over again, that was easier.”
“Well,” Eddie says, smiling so softly and beautiful, “I’m not straight.”
Buck laughs, relief washing over him. “Yeah, you, uh, mentioned that.”
“So it’s not embarrassing or pathetic, anymore, right? I do hope you still don't get over it, though.”
“You definitely don’t have to worry about that.”
Eddie grins. “C’mere.” Buck does, of course, walking to Eddie, not stopping until their feet are bumping up against each other, hands landing solidly on Eddie’s waist. “You forgot to kiss me yesterday,” Eddie says, nose brushing against Buck.
Buck sways even closer, just a hairs breadth away. “I was trying to be polite.”
“Think that’s the opposite of polite.” He's completely right, and Buck doesn’t make him wait a second longer, closing the last micron of distance.
After a month of watching strangers get everything they’ve ever wanted, this is Buck’s miracle. Kissing Eddie. Now he knows the way his mouth feels under Buck’s, the taste of him, the little gasp he makes when Buck bites down on his bottom lip. Eddie’s hands in his hair. And Buck wants more and more and more. Eddie opens his mouth to Buck and lets his tongue slip inside. Buck has no idea how he walked away before, when Eddie was pleading for this. It’s the most idiotic thing he’s ever done in his life, and he’ll never make that mistake again.
Buck doesn’t even notice that Eddie has been moving them, walking them further into the house until the back of Buck’s legs hit the couch. Eddie breaks away then, and Buck can’t help the whine that’s pulled from him, not even close to ready to let Eddie go. Eddie shoves him down to the couch though, and this Buck can get on board with. He tugs at Eddie’s waist, ready to pull him into his lap so they can continue where they left off, but Eddie shakes his head, and sinks down to his knees instead.
Buck suddenly feels dizzy, mouth gone dry at their reversed positions.
“Do you trust me?” Eddie teases, throwing Buck’s words back at him from the day before, but Buck only nods back, as earnest as he can.
“Of course,” he says, just as serious.
“Well, maybe you shouldn’t. I haven’t done this before. For all you know, I could do some damage.” Eddie clacks his teeth together, a playful bite to make his point.
Buck rolls his eyes, fondly. He reaches out, and touches Eddie’s chin, softly, tilting his face up. “Just don’t do that move on me and it’ll be fine.” Eddie huffs out a laugh, his warm breath hitting Buck’s wrist. “You don’t have to you know. It’s—”
“I want to,” Eddie says, nuzzling his cheek into Buck’s hand further, looking up at Buck with his beautiful eyes, wide and innocent. Heat pools in Buck’s belly. “Been thinking about it since yesterday. Wanna try.” And then he takes Buck’s thumb into his warm, wet, perfect mouth, sucking it, and Buck might just pass out.
“Fucking shit,” he curses, as all the blood in his brain travels south.
There's absolutely nothing innocent in the way Eddie bites down gently on the thumb before he pulls off with a wet pop. “Like that?” he asks with a hint of mischief.
Buck laughs, delirious and happy and so in love. “Yeah, just like that. What a way to go.”
Eddie huffs, shoving Buck back into the couch. “No teeth, I promise. Now, can we get your pants off and let me do this?”
Buck can’t argue with that. He shuffles out of his clothes, and then hands Eddie a pillow for his knees. He knows from experience that this floor is not comfortable. Eddie shakes his head fondly, but accepts the pillow from Buck, leaning up to give him a quick kiss before settling back between his knees.
“Okay,” Buck says, breath hitching as Eddie wraps a hand around the base of his cock. “Just—just take it slow. You don’t need to prove anything. We can work up to more—fuck,” Buck curses as Eddie mouths at the tip of his dick. Buck’s head hits the back of the couch, eyes squeezed shut as he tries desperately not to shoot off immediately. “Yeah, just keep doing—do whatever you want with me, Jesus Christ, that's so fucking good—” he babbles, hand stroking Eddie’s hair. “What the fuck,” he gasps, as Eddie takes him in further.
Buck’s never been this overwhelmed, this quickly. There’s no slowing down as he barrels towards the finish line when they’ve only just started. It happens so fast he barely has time to warn Eddie, suddenly in a panic. “Eddie, Eddie!” Buck tugs on his hair. “You gotta—I’m gonna—” Eddie pulls off, and looks up at Buck with glassy eyes, and messy, red lips, and Buck has absolutely no chance.
Buck comes right then, his eyes locked onto Eddie’s, as everything else around them disappears. Eddie stares at him the whole time, and after, blinking with the remains of Buck’s all-too-late warning on his cheek. Buck will apologize for that later, when his head doesn’t feel like goop.
Eddie, for his part, licks his lips, before spitting into his palm. His hand disappears from Buck’s view as he falls forward panting into Buck’s thigh. He bites down as he comes, only a few seconds later. Buck’s spent cock twitches, watching it all play out as his brain continues leaking out his ears.
Buck’s thigh is wet from Eddie’s spit and his own come. It’s the only thing he can focus on as he grounds himself back into reality. “What the fuck,” Buck breathes out again, before yanking Eddie up to join him on the couch. He uses all his remaining energy to rearrange them until they're both laying down, Eddie on top of him, tangled together to fit.
The room is so quiet, apart from their heavy breathing, and the ceiling fan whirling overhead. Buck’s head is filled with a static buzzing, building and building until Eddie breaks the silence. “We have to work on our stamina.”
Buck snorts, beaming. “Yeah,” he says, carding his fingers through Eddie’s hair, “We’ll work on that.”
They stay like that for a while, enjoying the afterglow, so in tune with each other, even their breathing syncs up. It hits Buck then, laughter bubbling up. He tries to hide it, nuzzling his face into Eddie’s skin, but Eddie’s not having it, guiding him by the chin back to lock eyes. “What?” he asks, smiling.
Buck bites his lip, shaking his head. “You’re gonna hate it.”
Eddie rolls his eyes, still smiling as he repeats: “What? Tell me.”
Buck smirks. He thinks the situation has allowed him a little cockiness. “You kind of proved me right.”
“Hm?” Eddie’s brow furrows, so sweetly.
“My sex powers worked. I’d say, uh, you figuring out you like men is pretty significant.” Eddie huffs, rolling his eyes even more dramatically. It lights Buck up from the inside. “Pretty miraculous, even. Some may say, on par with winning the lottery, especially—oof.” A pillow smacks Buck in the head. He’s pretty sure it’s the one Eddie had been kneeling on. Buck laughs, shielding his face as he’s smacked again. “You asked!”
He hears the dull thud of the pillow dropping to the floor, and then Eddie’s warm hands grasp his own, linking their fingers together as he moves them above Buck’s head. “Idiot,” Eddie whispers, leaning down for a kiss, now that his way is clear. After, he rests chin on Buck’s chest, looking up, squinting. “Are you trying to say your dick gave someone the winning lottery ticket?”
“Kind of, yeah.”
Eddie huffs, warm breath tickling Buck’s skin. “Okay, I’ll believe you when you manage that for us.”
“Okay, we’ll work on that, too.” Buck pulls him in for another kiss. He’s not quite sure if these powers work for repeat performances, but he’s more than willing to find out.