Birmingham Holiday

by Funnygirl00

Summary:

One evening, Princess Katherine Kovach of Andorra has decided to escape the luxury of the palace for one night. Desperate for a taste of freedom, she runs away, eager to spend several nights experiencing the night life in London. However, due to a twist of fate, Kate finds herself in the backseat of Thomas Shelby's car. Thomas, offers her a job and she takes it, just for a few weeks in order to make enough money to make her way back to the palace. But as she grows to enjoy her freedom, she soon realizes that she will have to chose between her heart and the throne.

Chapter 1: Cover art

Once again, thank Karina for her beautiful artwork!!

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Chapter 2: A 'lucky' escape

January 2nd, 1919

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She was going to kill herself tonight.

True, she’d said that she’d kill herself a dozen times or so to win an argument with her parents. Not that ever helped, because she’d never managed to win a single argument with them yet. She was the princess of Andorra, and she was being trained to take up the throne as soon as her family found a suitable match for her. She didn’t want to marry at all. At least not one of these stuck-up lords, dukes or princes. They were all so weak, and while her parents insisted that a weak man wouldn’t be a threat to the throne, she wanted to marry a man. Not a weak and submissive dog. She wanted love and to be loved.

Yesterday, they’d spent touring England with a duke from something or other. She didn’t remember! She was bored out of her mind! She couldn’t focus lately; she wanted to feel something, anything, but she was starting to lose her mind. Tonight, it had been dining and dancing at Buckingham Palace. Prince Edward the 8th had been pushed at her, and she’d been obliged to dance with him. He was the heir to the throne, so, naturally, she should oblige him, but he wasn’t ‘weak’ enough. However, she was more disinterested in him because of the fact that he had a mistress on the side. Men who kept mistresses in secret at this stage in their life would always keep a mistress on the side. She wanted to be enough for one man and one man only. There was his younger brother, Albert, but once again, the younger son would be deemed an unsuitable match. However, apart from his stammer, she didn’t see why he wouldn’t be a good match. He seemed a kind person, though.

However, she was now starting to feel that she was too much for one man. She had a temper that she always had to stifle. She had a fire that was constantly burning in her chest. She lied constantly to everyone and herself. She told herself that she could find happiness inside her if she tried hard enough. She couldn’t force herself to be happy, and she’d resigned herself to absolute misery. There was no point talking to anybody. She’d tried explaining that she felt as if she were going to explode from the inside. But all that got her were doses of opium poured into her milk or tea, even whisky. Anything to keep her calm and sedate.

Tap, tap, tap.

The door opened, and she turned as a maid entered with a tray of chocolate creams and the telltale glass of whisky. The maid, one of the Buckingham Palace servants, not her regular maid, entered the room. She smiled at her. “Your Highness, I was told to bring this to you.”

She didn’t want it. She waved her hand. “I don’t want it tonight, thank you.”

The maid hesitated, and she said. “Are you sure? I was told that it’s your favourite Irish whisky.”

Katherine hesitated; she shouldn’t, but an idea crossed her mind. It was a long shot. But she did it, no matter how terrible it was. “Do I detect that you have an Irish accent?” The girl went still, and she said. “Don’t worry. I won’t say anything.”

The girl instantly relaxed and smiled. “Oh, thank you, your majesty. You’re the only one to notice.”

“I’ve always admired the accent.” She said honestly. “It’s so comforting. It’s alright, go ahead and enjoy the glass of whisky.”

The girl paused and nodded. “I am thirsty, so I will not argue with you.”

Katherine nodded and smiled and exhaled deeply. She needed the girl to drink the whisky. The dose always kicked in within five minutes. She needed to stall her. “Tell me,” Katherine asked calmly. “Which of the two princes seems to have the better head on his shoulders?” The maid hesitated before Katherine explained. “My parents favour Edward; however, I find Albert to be sweeter. So… I was hoping that you’d tell a little bit more about each prince.”

The maid, eager to gossip, instantly sat down in a nearby chair and drank the whisky. Turns out she wasn’t so good at guessing because Albert, allegedly, had his eye on a married woman. The king didn’t really seem to care, because Albert was the ‘spare’ prince. Perhaps she should let her parents pick her husband for her. After all, she appeared to have her radar off when it came to men.

Soon, the girl’s speaking became slurred, and she dropped the empty glass of whisky. Katherine stood up, got the girl into her bed and began to strip her of her uniform. The girl protested, but she was too groggy to do anything. She and the girl were a similar size, so after getting into the uniform, she tucked her hair into the cap. She put a nightdress over the girl before tucking her into the bed. She then turned off the lights and left her room with her eyes lowered. She knew how to get out of the palace because she was given a full tour, even to the kitchens. She made her way down and out! The moment she smelt the crisp winter air, her heart rose in her chest and began to beat frantically!!

She was free! She was free! A guard let her out through the servants' entrance along with the others without so much as a second glance. She had no plan, but she knew that she was going to get out of here for one night.

She followed the other maids out through the park, and once they were on the other side, she immediately scanned the streets for a pub. She saw one. Paxton’s Tavern, and it was lively. The maids were exhausted, and they all started heading home. She wasn’t tired. She was bored out of her mind. She pushed the door open and was greeted with the sounds of laughter. There was music and dancing. She’d taken one of the coats hanging by the servants’ entrance, and when she put her hands in the pocket, she’d found a wallet. She opened it up and saw several pounds, but there were plenty of shillings. She knew that this was wrong, but she could afford to pay her back by stealing her clothes, money and drugs. She could only hope and pray that they wouldn’t fire that girl, but she needed to get out.

She paid for an Irish whisky and fish and chips. It was worth it. It was totally worth it. It was probably the most delicious food that she’d had in a very, very long time. She was nearly done when a group of men walked by her table. “So, you figured out what you’re going to ask the Princess tomorrow?”

“Why does she look like such a bitch?” A few other men laughed crudely. “No. I’m serious. She may be set to be the future queen of Andorra, but she always looks like she wants to rip someone’s head off!”

“I know!” Another guy laughed. She took a quick look around the room… and recognised two reporters in a group of men. They were probably with more reporters, and she’d walked right into their regular drinking spot! “f**king hell, she’s cold!”

She turned back and stood up, making sure to keep her back to the group. She’d taken her hat off, and it had fallen to the floor. She wasn’t stopping to get it. She stood up, keeping her hands in her pockets, and walked as calmly as she could towards the door.

The door opened, and she found herself staring into the eyes of a reporter from somewhere. Birmingham Dispatch. The man tipped his hat as he stepped aside to let her through. “Your Majesty.”

She blinked and stepped out of the room without acknowledging him. He probably had an unconscious slip, but she wasn’t going to be anywhere near him for when he realised that she actually was the princess. She walked swiftly down the street, and the door to the pub shut. The moment it did, she ran! And by God, did she run hard! Her ‘lucky’ escape, was turning out to be not so lucky after all. She’d run past two alleys when she realised that she’d run in the opposite direction of Buckingham Palace!

She stopped and turned…to spot that one reporter who’d called her ‘your majesty’ and two other reporters behind him! She started moving backwards, and one of them retorted at her!! “There she is!!” She grabbed her skirts, and she ran again! “Oi!!” They shouted. “You get back here!!”

She didn’t. She rounded the corner and ran down another alley! She then went to the left of the street. There were a tonne of cars there. For some reason, she didn’t know why; she opened the door of one and jumped into the backseat of the car!! There were blankets in there. She grabbed one, pulled it over her, closed her eyes and prayed that she’d escape detection.

She heard running and panting. That made her grab hold of her blanket tighter, and she covered her mouth, desperate to be left alone. Yes. This was a mistake. She should have never left the comfort of the palace for this.

“Now,” the car shook, probably because someone was leaning against the car. “Where’d she f**king go??”

“I don’t know!!”

“Are you sure she was the f**king princess!?”

“Dead sure!!” The one said. “She had the same green eyes, and her hair was done up as well!”

“f**k!” Someone spat. “If that was the princess…that’d be one hell of a story.”

“Oi!!” Some man barked in fury, causing the tension in the air to shift. “Get the f**k off my car!!”

One of the reporters exhaled. “Did you see…a woman run down here?”

“No.” The man said, his voice so cold that it was almost dead from the lack of emotions in his voice.

“Are you sure?” The Birmingham Dispatcher asks. “Because we’re fairly sure that we saw---

“I said no f**king woman ran down here!!” She shivered. This man, he was angry. “If you want to start something, then f**king start it. I need to hit someone.”

There was a long silence, and then the reporter said tightly. “Our mistake. Excuse us.”

The man let out a grunt of irritation, and then he started his car!! Katherine lay there in pure terror and shock as she realised that she was in the back of a car with a strange man, and the car was moving!!! She didn’t know what to do. She didn’t know where she was going, and right now, she’d gotten in over her head! She shouldn’t have got in the car. But she couldn’t get out of the car, not with the reporters around! The press would have a field day about her excursion.

The car pulled away from the kerb, and she covered her mouth. She didn’t know what to do. This man, he sounded dangerous. So, popping up into his car once they were far enough away was out of the question. He sounded like the kind of man who’d hold her for ransom! She lay there, cold and terrified as she tried to figure out what to do. She couldn’t overpower him, so that meant one thing. She had to wait. He had to stop somewhere, and when he did, she’d get out of the car, call for a car and get back to the palace. That was the simplest and easiest solution. He had to live nearby, so she doubted that he’d live nearby.

However, when the car had been driving for more than an hour, she began to grow concerned. She was exhausted too, and he kept smoking in the car. The scent of cigarettes made her ill, so she kept the blanket over her head. That made her warm, and being warm put her to sleep! She couldn’t fall asleep, not in a moment like this. She needed to stay awake until he parked the car.

However, Katherine made the mistake of closing her eyes for one minute. At least, she thought it was one minute. Because the next minute she opened her eyes, there was a light shining in her eyes, which made it hard for her to see. However, the one thing she was aware of was a pair of cold, blue eyes mere inches away from her face.

Chapter 3: Mr. Thomas Shelby

He had no clue what the f**k was going on.

Tonight, it had been a very strange f**king night. He had gone up to London to visit an old friend. Gilbert Marin. His reason for the visit was because he used to work for Billy Kimber. Tommy needed someone who’d actually worked for Kimber so he could begin forming his plan to take Billy Kimber down. The man had gotten lazy and arrogant during the war. He’d let the Lees run ragged, and there was disorder all around. He hated disorder. He hated it before the war, but now that the war was over, his dislike for chaos had gotten worse. He was tired of being in the mud while lazy people like Kimber sat around in their offices, untouched by the world around them. He was going to pull his family up out of the mud, and nothing was going to stop him. Not Polly. Not Arthur. Not God Himself!

But now he found himself staring into the most striking pair of green eyes that he’d ever seen in his life. Scratch that, she was probably the most beautiful woman that he’d ever seen in his life. And it had been a very, very long time since a woman had caught his eye like this. She was stunning; she was the reason that the word ‘gorgeous’ had been invented. She was bundled up in one of his blankets from the back. She was dressed in a dark green coat, and her rich mahogany hair shone under the light of his match. He probably wouldn’t have noticed her at all, but he’d left some items in the back and wanted to get them out. He’d opened the door and instantly noticed a bundle in the back. However, when he’d lit a match to see what it was…it was anything but a bundle.

A sudden stinging alerted him to the fact that the match was burning his finger. Her green eyes widened, and she let out a gasp as he blew the match out. He needed a light. He moved to the garage door and threw it open with a bang. The light from the moon and stars lit up the dark garage and enabled him to spot a lantern. He lit it and saw that there was enough light for fifteen minutes. He could hear her moving around in the car, probably trying to get out. When he approached, he saw that she was doing just that. She managed to untangle herself from the blanket and stumbled out of the backseat of the car. Her heel caught on the running board, causing her to trip and giving him the perfect moment to catch her. She gasped as he grabbed her around her slim waist.

“I’ve got you.” He carefully pulled her out of the car and set her on the ground. She stared at him, those eyes of hers getting bigger and bigger by the second. “Right, who the f**k are you?” 

She jolted like she’d been shot. She wasn’t from around these parts. He could tell. Her perfume smelt rich and expensive. “K-Katherine.”

She sounded scared, and she looked scared to death. She was breathing so hard that she was shaking. He didn’t want to scare her, but he was tired and it was late. “What were you doing in my car?”

“I was,” she said, all croaky, so she swallowed nervously. “running away”.

He nodded as he asked. “From what?”

“Family.”

He understood that. “What’s your family name?”

She just stared at him before saying in a slightly calmer voice. “I’d rather not say.”

Fair enough. He was a stranger, and she’d obviously had no intention of being caught. So, clearly, she didn’t want to say her name. “What were you doing outside tonight?”

She licked her lower lip as she said. “I just…wanted to be alone. “To think…without people telling me what to do,” her voice got softer as she said. “for one day”.

For one day. He knew what she meant. He shouldn’t have, but he did. She cleared her throat. “I’m sorry. I did not mean to intrude in your personal space.”

“It’s alright,” he said. “Just consider it passing through.”

“Thank you.” She bit her lip and asked. “Might you know where I’d be able to find a reputable boarding house at this time of night?”

Ok, she was just as posh as she acted. There wasn’t anywhere open, not nearly at midnight. “You got any money?” he enquired.

She nodded as she put her hands in her pocket. “Yes.” She went still a moment and then started patting around in her pockets.

“You lose something?” She whirled around, yanking the door to his car open. He frowned. “What?”

“I lost my purse!” Oh, that wasn’t good. He moved to hold the lantern over her head so she could see. However, his eyes were more focused on the curve of her neck and the light on her hair. She searched under the seats and shook out the blankets before straightening up, her face pale. “I lost my purse!”

Well, that made things easy for him. He didn’t have to go and help her find accommodations. He wanted her nearby for his own selfish reasons. He’d be lying if he said it was because of Kimber, but it was something much more primal. “Well then,” he said lowly. “Looks like you’re coming home with me.”

She shook her head, her face instantly growing pale. “I couldn’t impose, especially after everything.”

“But you will.” He said firmly as he held her gaze. “I’m not leaving you here.”

She took a step back. “I can sleep in the car.”

She could; that’d be a safe option. But judging by the look in her eyes, she’d be gone when he woke up tomorrow. He couldn’t have that. “If I leave you here, you’ll have been raped more times than you can f**king count.” The blood drained out of her face at his words. “It’s not safe for you here. I got a place you can crash.”

“I can’t,” she said quietly. “It’s not proper!”

“No, it’s not.” He said. “But you’ll be alive and in one piece tomorrow morning.”

She blinked. “So, do you swear---

“I don’t swear on anything.” He said pointedly, which caused her even more unease. “Come on.”

She blinked and stared at him; clearly she wasn’t used to being ordered about. She nodded and whispered. “Alright.”

He nodded at her and blew out the lantern. “Follow me.”

She did, and she walked beside him at first. She hovered beside him, her hands folding and unfolding because of her fears. After he locked the garage door, he moved down the street, and she fell in step beside him. They walked in silence, but he watched her out of the corner of his eye. He almost wondered if she’d been kept prisoner. He remembered the story of Blanche Monnier. A woman who’d been kept imprisoned by her mother for twenty-five years. She’d been locked in an attic and forgotten by the world. This woman's head was on a constant swivel. She kept looking around at the world, almost as if she’d never seen it before. She’d stare at things in curiosity and manage to pick her way around the puddles of mud on the pavement.

They were halfway to the house when he asked her. “Where are you from?”

She bit her lip and admitted quietly. “Far away from here.”

“Where?”

She inhaled and said. “Andorra la Vella.”

He frowned. “What?”

“It’s near France and Spain.”

He frowns. “You don’t sound French.”

“I speak French.” She said. “Fluently.”

He felt his brow arch. “Is that so?”

Oui, je le fais. Parles-tu français ? (Yes, I do. Do you speak French?

He nodded. “Enough.”

She smiled and shook her head. After a few moments she asked. “Where am I?”

“Birmingham.”

She nodded and then asked. “Well, how far is that from London?”

“Three hours.” Her entire body jolted, and her eyes went wide. “Problem?”

“No.” She said simply. “I didn’t realise I’ve never been to Birmingham.”

“I figured as much.”

She laughs lightly, causing him to look at her. She had…a very pretty smile. No, it was actually warm. “Why, what’s wrong with Birmingham?”

“You’ll see.” He looks her up and down before asking her the question that he needed to know the answer to. “How long are you planning on staying?”

“I don’t know.” She bit her lip and folded her hands. “I-I suppose that I should find a job. Then, I can make some money.” Her voice faded as she mumbled quietly, clearly making a plan half in her head and half out loud. After a long silence, she asked. “Do you know of anywhere that’s hiring?”

He didn’t think that they had anything that’d suit her. But he did know of a job that she could do. “Have you ever worked in a pub?”

She shakes her head. “No. Is it hard?”

He nearly laughed at how oblivious she sounded. She was posh, all right. “No. You just pour drinks, take money and sweep the floor.”

She instantly brightens up. “I can do that,” he nodded. She bit her lip and asked. “Do they require recommendations in order to seek employment?”

“Just say my name,” he exhaled. “You’ll get the job.”

She nodded and asked. “Is the pub nearby?”

“Yes.”

She cleared her throat. “And is there a place to stay?” He glanced at her as he stopped in front of his house and unlocked the door. “One that would be considered respectable?”

“You talk too much,” he said.

“Just curious.” She said. “It’s just… “I’ve never done anything like this before, and it’s all,” he glanced at her as she shook her head, a strand of mahogany hair hanging down her head. Her voice softened as she said with wonder. “It’s so different.”

He didn’t understand her. She was like something out of a fairytale, and he had no idea why she was in Birmingham. He unlocked the door. “Inside,” she nodded, and they both went to move in at the same time, causing them to crash into each other. She let out a gasp as he exhaled. “What are you doing?”

She blinked those eyes of hers and stammered. “L-ladies enter first.”

“If we were up in London.” He said lowly, causing her to inhale. “Aye. But we’re not. You’re not a lady, and I’m not a gentleman. It’s my house, not yours. Understood?”

She nodded. “Yes.”

That soft voice of hers was enough to take the ‘tough’ out of him for a few seconds. He exhaled and gestured towards the door. “Go on.”

She hurried into the house, and he shook his head. Ten minutes with her and she was making him soft. He locked the door and removed his hat as she said. “You never told me your name, Sir.”

‘Sir’. Christ, she was mad. He turned towards her as he said. “Thomas Shelby.”

“Mr Shelby.” She said it as if she were testing a fine whisky on her tongue. He turned to see her standing there, looking like a prim and proper lady, as she said. “A pleasure to meet you, Mr Shelby.” He was f**ked. She inhaled before saying. “I don’t mean to impose further but…is there a lady of the house that I may discuss a certain malady with?”

He was confused. “A what?”

She inhaled as she shifted in discomfort. “I require some assistance.”

“With what?” He asked.

Those cheeks of hers got pinker as she said. “It’s a delicate matter.”

“Well, I’m not waking up my f**king sister. I’m the only one awake, so, you’ll have to tell me. What’s the f**king problem?”

She blinked and then whispered in embarassement. “I need help…loosening my stays.”

Ok, he saw the embarasement. He exhaled as he said. “Get out of your coat and turn around.”

Those green eyes of hers flashed with such a fury that it was a wonder that he hadn’t been struck by lightning. “Mr. Shelby! Such a thing is not permitted---

“i don’t give a f**k.” he stated. “It’s Midnight, I’m tired, you need to get settled. Now, turn around, lift your f**king blouse so I can get you out of the  corset and go to bed!” He didn’t even see her hand fly until it made contact with his nose!! he let out a groan as he grabbed his nose for a moment. He felt warm liquid flow over his fingers so he looked down…just as the blood began to trickle down his fingers.

She’d broken his nose.

Chapter 4: Welcome to Birmingham

Why had she done that??

She should NOT have done that for oh, so many reasons! The first being, he was offering her shelter and safety. The second being that he was a stranger with an air of danger about him. But on the other hand, he was a man. A man whose name she’d only learnt less than a minute ago, and now he was ordering her to just lift her blouse for him!! A gentleman would NEVER DARE suggest such a thing!! However, he wasn’t a gentleman, and she wasn’t in London. She was somewhere called Birmingham. It was VERY different from London. The area smelt of smoke, coal, mud, water and other scents that could be described as foul in places.

He stepped towards her and stared down at her, those blue eyes of his sparking with fire. She stepped back and found herself pressed against the wall. She swallowed as he stared her down, unsure as to what he was doing. Was he going to hit her? He probably would! Not that she didn’t deserve it! She’d just flat out slapped him for no reason! His nose was bleeding, so she’d hit him hard. She hadn’t meant to, but she’d just panicked! She’d been shocked and embarrassed, so that had been her reaction.

He exhaled roughly as he said. “Do that again… And I’ll make sure you remember not to. Understood?”

She could only whisper. “Yes, sir.”

He jerked his head towards the stairs. “Upstairs.” She nodded and moved numbly up the stairs, her heart pounding in her chest. This…was scary. Actually, it was terrifying because she was all alone with no way to get out of here. She couldn’t tell people who she was because that would put her in even more danger. However, she was convinced that the people down here, even the police, would think that she was insane and have her imprisoned for making such a claim. She had to get a job and literally work her way back home. That was the safest option. She had no other alternative, and this man…she didn’t trust him. He was certainly the kind of man who’d hold her for ransom in order to get ahead.

She paused at the top of the stairs, and he placed his hand in the small of her back, causing her to jump. He’d touched her several times and had definitely held onto her on two occasions. She wasn’t used to this much contact. All contact between a royal and another member was brief. One could almost say that they were starved for the slightest touch, anything to prove that they were still alive, for they were most certainly not human. His touch was given without a single thought, and it was given frequently. She wasn’t used to being touched by any stranger the way he touched her.

He opened the door and stepped into the dark room. He moved to a small table and lit the lamp there. He exhaled as he said. “Used to be my brother’s room. He married and moved, so you can stay here till you find a place.”

She stared at him. He was…complicated. He could be cold and rude but still so generous at the same time. She didn’t understand him, and she could tell by looking at him that there was a lot to learn about him; he was a curiosity, and she’d always been a curious child. She inhaled as she said. “Thank you, Mr Shelby.”

He nodded and said. “Get out of your coat and turn around so I can go to bed.”

She didn’t want to do this. She really didn’t, but she didn’t have a choice. She shrugged out of the green coat and put it on the bed. He moved towards her, and she turned around, pulling the blouse free from the waistband of the skirt. He was right behind her, and she felt as if she were going to start crying. She knew that in his world he was helping her, but in her world, it was a different story. The way she’d been raised…this would be considered assault and extremely damaging to her reputation. But she couldn’t say anything, so she had to let it happen.

He touched her waist, and she jumped. There he was with that touch again. He rolled her blouse up to her chest and began pulling at the ties. She inhaled sharply. His touch was impersonal and not seeking. She closed her eyes, knowing that this would be over in a matter of moments. Soon, the corset was free and hanging off her waist. She clutched it to her, wanting to hide herself from him, even though she had more layers underneath.

He exhaled as he said. “No one wears stuff like that down here. You’d be better off feeding the fire with that thing.” She nodded. “Don’t know where Polly keeps the sheets, but…” He moved to a cupboard and opened it. “There’s some blankets in here. There’s a bathroom under the stairs if you need it.”

She moved towards the cupboard to take the blankets from him. “Thank you.”

As she took them from him, he added. “The door locks, and you can put the chair under the lock if you need it.” She went still at those words. He was telling her that she’d be safe in here and that there was extra protection if she needed to feel safe. “You have a gun?” She shook her head. “I’ll get you one tomorrow. Know how to use one?”

She hesitated before saying. “I can shoot a rifle.”

He nods. “Pistol works the same way.”

“Ok.”

There was a moment of silence, and then he asked her quietly. “Somebody hurt you?”

She couldn’t answer him right away. To the eyes of the world, she had everything that she ever wanted. She’d been born royal, given ‘everything’ that she ever wanted and lived in a rich and fabulous world. But the golden cage was tainted. Yes, she had everything material, but emotionally she’d been starved. She didn’t have a childhood because she’d never been a child. The moment she could talk, she’d been taught how to walk properly, how to sit, how to stand and how to look. She wore whatever was put out for her. She’d been educated more so than her mother. She’d been taught English, Spanish and French fluently. Educated on numerous subjects, even maths and science. Her teachers had been power-hungry, odious little ingrates who enjoyed smacking her legs or hand with a stick for every incorrect answer. Religious figures chided her for her ‘pride, vanity and temper’, all of which had to be beaten out of her in order to give her humility. She was an only child, so there was no one her age to play with. Not that she’d been allowed time to play; she’d been trained up to be a great warrior princess and an intelligent queen. But she wondered if it would even be worth all the abuse she’d endured.

She couldn’t look at him as she said. “Depends on who you ask.”

Suddenly, he gripped her chin and made her look at him, causing her to gasp. He didn’t do anything, but he looked at her. No, he stared through her. He stared at her with such intensity that she might as well have been naked in front of him. She hadn’t felt so vulnerable or exposed in her life before. She almost couldn't breathe because of the way he was staring straight through her. It was as if he was trying to read her mind, and that scared her. She was used to being the intimidating one. Not because she tried to be, but because she was ‘her royal highness’. This was such a change in power that it made her dizzy. She reached up and grabbed his wrist so she could steady herself, but that made it worse. It made the moment more tense between them, and for a second she forgot how to breathe.

He leaned forward.

She inhaled and shied away. She didn’t know why she did. She didn’t know why he leaned forward, but she didn’t like the feeling of how it felt when he got close to her. It scared her. Chilled her to the bone and warmed her at the same time. She didn’t understand it. It was unfamiliar. It felt wrong but right at the same time. However, she’d never been alone with a man before, especially alone at night in ‘her’ bedroom. Furthermore, she’d never been around a man like him. He scared her, but she wasn’t scared of him. She didn’t understand how any of that made sense, but it just did.

“No one’ll hurt you here.” He said quietly, running his thumb under her eye. God, she was crying after all. “You’re safe.” She couldn’t answer him. ”No one’ll come looking down here for you because this is the last place anyone would look for someone like you.”

She bit her lip before asking. “Like me?”

He shook his head as he said. “I don’t know what the f**k is going on yet, but it’s clear to me that you’re running away from someone. Someone who hurt you.” She inhaled sharply. “You’re obviously some kind of rich girl.”

She blinked. “You can’t know that.”

“Yeah, I do. The way you talk, walk…you carry yourself like some f**king princess.” She nearly passed out at those words. He shook his head. “You don’t f**king belong here.”

“I don’t belong anywhere.” She admitted breathlessly.

“No one belongs anywhere.” He said without blinking. “We just put up with where we’re f**king sat.” She understood that. They were all put into these roles in life and had to play them, whether they wanted to or not. He knew this, somehow. She didn’t know how he knew, but she had a feeling that they weren’t too very different. Suddenly, his hand dropped from her chin, and he turned on his heel. “Tomorrow, I’ll show you around!”

She just stared at him as he walked out of the room and shut the door behind him without a second look! Ok. He was confusing as hell. Interesting, though. People were usually so predictable; his moods and personalities were all over the place. It made life interesting, though. He didn’t put on pretences, though; he was very insightful and curious. Dangerous, yes. But she had a sense that he was only dangerous to those who presented a danger to him. She was an object of curiosity in his life; that’s all.

She turned and looked at the bed. It was late, and she was tired. She first shook out the blankets, and then for the first time in her life…she made a bed. She’d never made one before, and it showed. However, for her first time, she didn’t feel that it was too bad!

Knock. Knock knock.

“Open up.” It was him.

“Door’s unlocked.” She said as she straightened up.

He exhaled as he came in with something in his hands. “I told you to lock the door.”

“I was going to.” She wasn’t, because she’d actually forgotten to do so.

He handed her some fabric. “You’ll need something to sleep in. This’ll do until tomorrow. Alright?” She nodded as she took what appeared to be a shirt from him. He exhaled as he said. “Knowing Poll and Ada, they’ll want to take you shopping or something.”

She shook her head. “I couldn’t ask that---

“You’re not asking.” He said. “I’m telling you.” He studied her and said. “You may be able to trade that dress for something that won’t stand out as much here. Ok?”

She nodded. “Yes, Mr Shelby.” As he turned to walk away from her, she said. “Thank you for everything. You’re most generous and kind.”

He was still for a moment before turning towards her and asking. “How would you know?” She didn’t know, but…she could see it in his eyes. “Lock the door.”

He then closed it and was gone again. She stood there for a moment, completely surprised and confused by his ever-changing moods. He was a mystery, a puzzle that would never be figured out. She shook her head and moved to lock the door. Not because she felt a need to, but because it seemed important to him.

Click.

The sound of footsteps told her that he’d been outside waiting for her to lock it. She knew that she was safe here, but it was like something that he needed to know. She removed the beige blouse and black skirt. She removed several of the other unnecessary layers before pulling on his shirt. The shirt was cold, but it smelt like him somehow. But it also smelt like horses and cigarettes; it was comforting. She got into the bed, under the covers, and sleep instantly overtook her. She shouldn’t be so exhausted, but she was. She hadn’t been sleeping well because she was under so much stress lately that her body was now finally getting the rest it deserved.

---

She was awoken by the sounds of horse carts and people talking out loud. She moved to the window to see if she could see what was going on, but she couldn’t. There was a lot of excitement and bustle outside. She removed his shirt and pulled on the blouse and then the skirt. She did as he advised and left the corset behind. She pulled on her shoes and then unlocked the door. She hurried down the stairs, opened the door and peered outside.

Birmingham was a poor neighbourhood, but it was full of hard-working people. There was a Black preacher in the corner, talking loudly. There were coal workers walking down the street and chatting loudly. Children running down the street with their schoolbooks, screaming and laughing while hitting each other with their books. The younger kids played ball in the streets, being careful not to get run over by the carts. It was a very simple life here, but dear God, it was so full of life.

At that moment, Thomas Shelby trotted by on a beautiful, jet-black horse. His brow rose as he acknowledged her there. He paused in front of her, removed the cigarette from his lips and said. “Welcome to Birmingham.”

She couldn’t stop a smile from creeping on her face at his words. Despite the circumstances, she was happy to be here. Because despite all the smoke and peculiar smells in Birmingham…this was the first time that she was actually able to breathe clearly.

---

Chapter 5: Her first day

“It’s beautiful.”

Thomas stared at her in shock. “What?” She nodded as she looked at the everyday people milling around the dirty streets. “This place is sh*t.”

She shook her head as she said. “I don’t think… I’ve never seen people this happy before.” He frowned. “Yes, I can see that they’re poorer and hard-working people, but,” her voice got softer. “The kids, running and playing in the street. I never had that.”

He looked at her from top to bottom. The clothes she was wearing were really nice. The blouse was covered in lace, and her skirt had embroidery on it. Her belt was on crooked as well. It was like she’d never dressed herself before, or she’d gotten dressed so fast that she didn’t work on her clothes. She was a curious woman, and he found her interesting. She was beautiful too, more so beautiful this morning. Her hair was hanging halfway down her back, and her green eyes were shining.

He cleared his throat and said. “Did you eat breakfast?”

She blinked and shook her head. “N-no.”

“Inside.” He hopped off the horse and moved towards the door. He opened it and yelled. “Finn!!!” Finn came running down and around the corner. Kate, she looked at the boy as if she were confused at the sight of him. He handed him the reins of Monahan. “Here. Take him back to the stables.”

Finn looks terrified. “But he’s big!!”

“Just walk the horse, Finn.” He said, tousling his hair. “You’re eleven on Sunday, remember?” Finn nods and walks uneasily in front of Monahan. If it were any other horse besides Monahan, he’d be concerned. Monahan was very laid back for a racehorse.

Finn looked back at him as he said. “Arthur’s mad as hell.”

“Whatever.” He exhaled deeply as he walked up to her. Those green eyes of hers widened as he approached her. “Inside.”

“Mr Shelby,” she cleared her throat as he turned her around. “I don’t eat breakfast as a rule.”

“Today you will.” He said as he opened the door for her. She stood there, waiting for him to go through this time. It was ridiculous. He’d never taken time to put stock in manners, but she made him consider it. He nodded for her to enter before him, and she smiled at him, dipping her head in gratitude. “Straight back is the kitchen.” She walked into the small kitchen and looked around. While she was high and mighty, somewhat, she didn’t turn up her nose at people. That was saying something. Ada was sitting at the table, eating jam on toast. Ada’s eyes widened in surprise as he said. “This is my sister, Ada. Ada, this is Kate.”

Kate nodded at Ada and said. “How do you do, Ada?”

Both he and Ada were surprised for a moment. Ada let out a laugh before saying. “Christ, this is the strangest thing you’ve brought home yet!” Kate started turning pink as she shifted backwards in surprise. He catches her and moves her forward towards Ada. “Does Polly know?”

“None of her f**king business,” he stated calmly before saying. “I have to talk to Arthur. You, make sure she eats. She’s going to be working at the Garrison.”

That only made Ada start laughing harder at him. “Her??? My God, Tommy! She’s not meant for that kind of life! Besides, what is she to you?”

“Like I said, Ada, none of your business.” Ada went still and shot him a look that said she’d yell at him later. “Now, make sure she eats.”

With that, he turned on his heel and headed to the betting room. He had a feeling that Kate didn’t even know how to cook an egg. Ada would help her figure that out. Whatever happened to her, she was strong enough to know that she had to adapt in order to survive. When he put his hand on her back, he could feel that she’d forgone the corset and a few other layers. She trembled every time that he touched her. He knew that it was from fear, and he hated that. She was a very innocent woman but resilient as well. He didn’t know if she had the guts to make it in this world, but he had a feeling that she could.

As for Arthur, he was, as Finn said, mad as hell. But Tommy was madder, and he didn’t really give a f**k. He was tired of living this way. He needed something to focus on, and he had big plans. He had big f**king plans. He was going to rig the races at Kimber’s and give everyone a reason to start making bets. On top of that, he’d made one hell of a discovery with the machine guns a couple of nights ago. Arthur could call a f**king family council tonight. He wouldn’t be there, and Kate, she’d give him the perfect excuse not to be there.

He entered the kitchen to see Kate and Ada laughing. Kate had her hair down…and he couldn’t help but stare at her for a second. Her hair was long, down to her waist, and it shone brightly in the light. “Right,” Ada said. “Let’s see if you’ve got it down now.”

“I think so.” He watched as Kate threw her hair over her shoulder and began to awkwardly braid it. Her fingers were stiff, but she was doing it properly. It would probably come undone in a matter of hours, but she’d get used to it. “Is this right?”

Ada laughed and nodded. “Yes, yes it is.” She shook her head before asking. “Where’d you come from?”

Kate’s fingers paused for a second before saying. “Somewhere far away. Most people don’t even know it exists.”

“How’d you wind up here?”

She was silent a moment before stating. “I ran away.” Ada blinked in surprise. “I don’t want to go into details, but… I had a feeling that, if I didn’t get out of…that place, that I was going to kill myself.” That caused him and Ada to go still. “I couldn’t…take one more night of being confined to my room, ordered about and drugged to force me to sleep.”

“Who was doing that?” Ada asked as she placed her hand near Kate. “Who?”

Kate blinked and whispered. “I really can’t say. Your brother is kind enough to help me find a job, and in time, I will find an establishment to reside in. But… I really do not want to reveal too much of my past.” Her voice got soft again, that softness full of pain that he knew all too well. “If the time comes and I have to go back” – he didn’t like the sound of that. “I don’t want my memories of my time here to be tainted with memories of…that other place.”

He knocked on the doorframe, and she spun around, forgetting her braid and letting it unravel. He cleared his throat and asked. “You ready?”

“Yes.”

“She needs to braid her hair first,” Ada says.

Kate nodded at him. “One minute.” He just turned her around to face him, gathered her hair and began to braid it tightly.

Ada laughed. “Haven’t seen you braid a girl’s hair in a while, Tom.”

“Braided yours, didn’t I?” he asked.

“That’s why I cut it all off!” Ada teased.

He ignored her teasing and asked Kate. “Did you eat?”

She nodded. “I had some toast.”

“She’s never used a toaster before, Tom.”

He nodded. “I thought so.” He grabbed a tie from the table and tied a double knot in her hair. “Right, let’s go.”

“Where are you taking her?”

“Like I said before, the Garrison.”

“Tommy, she’s not going to fit in there.” Ada said. “You can have her work the books here.”

“Ada!” He said firmly.

“It’s alright.” Kate said, in that formal tone of hers. “I’ve been enough of an imposition, and I do not wish to rely further upon Mr Shelby’s kindness. It’s alright; I’ve never been in a pub, so I must confess to being curious as to what it’ll be like. In addition,” she exhaled as she said. “Some liveliness and honest work in my life would be a worthwhile thing for me.”

He nodded. “You heard her, Ada. She wants the job,” he nodded. “Come on.”

“Yes, Mr Shelby.” She nodded at Ada. “Thank you again.”

“No problem,” Ada said with a wave. “Tomorrow, I’ll teach you how to scramble an egg.”

“Thank you.” She said. “I’d very much appreciate that.”

“Come,” he repeated before turning and walking out of the room. Kate’s shoes clicked behind him, and she caught up with him. They went out of the Garrison, and he headed up the street. Again, he watched her out of the corner of his eye, and her eyes darted all around. She was genuinely excited and curious about this. That…made no sense to him. Why the f**k would a girl, especially one of her class, be excited to work in a pub? It made no sense. Her hand brushed his, and he glanced down at her hand.

“I’m sorry.” She instantly folded her hands in front of her, tightly gripping her middle and index fingers. Seemed to be her way of calming herself down without looking like she was terrified.

He didn’t say a word, mostly because he didn’t know what to say to her. The opportunity to talk to her would present itself in time, but for now, it was business. They entered the Garrison, and it was only slightly busy. As they headed towards the far end of the bar, he observed Freddie Thorne in the corner. It made sense that his name was Thorne, because he was becoming a massive ‘thorn’ in Thomas’s side.

“On the house, Mr Shelby,” Harry said, instantly pouring him a glass of whisky. He nodded at Harry, who turned to Kate, who was by his side. “Ah, you must be the one who’s come here for the job.”

“Yes, Sir. I am.” Kate inhaled. “I feel it’s my duty to tell you that while I have no qualifications or references, I always follow through with anything that I set my mind to.”

“Tommy recommended you,” Harry said. “That’s good enough for me. Now, have you ever poured a pint before?”

Kate shook her head. “No.”

Harry chuckled. “Come on, lass. There’s an apron in back of here. Put it on, and I’ll show you. There’s a big game coming Saturday, and you’ll need to be on your toes.”

“Yes, sir.”

Kate hurried around the bar, a faint smile on her face. “Sir,” Harry said dryly. “Where’d you find this one again?”

“She got into the back of my car to get away from three men chasing her.” Harry’s face went still. “Someone’s after her, so keep an eye on her.”

Harry nods. “Yes, Tommy.”

“Anyone shows up asking for her, you know nothing. Make sure no one bothers her either.”

“Yes, Mr Shelby.”

At that moment, Freddie walked up and said. “I’ll take a mild.”

“Right.” Harry said. “Come here, lass.”

Words faded as he watched Kate bustle over and pay attention to Harry instructing her as he poured. Kate nodded, and then Harry handed the glass to Freddie. Another barkeep walked over with a tray of dirty glasses and said. “Three milds to the table by the window.”

“Right,” Harry said. Thomas turned to see Kate, already filling three mugs with milk. Harry chuckled. “Well, Tommy wasn’t fooling when he said you were a fast learner.”

Kate smiled and focused on her job at hand. “Who’s that?” Freddie asked.

He exhaled as he said. “None of your business.”

Freddie seemed to know that Thomas wasn’t in the mood for any of his games today, so he decided to play it straight. “One of my union comrades has a sister. Works in the telegraph office at the BSA factory.” He didn’t care. “She says, over the past week, they've had messages coming up from London to the brass. From Winston Churchill himself. Something about a robbery.” Ok, now he cared a little bit. He focused on his whisky and the cigarette in his hand in order to appear unaffected. But Freddie knew him. “A robbery of national significance”, it's said.  She found a list of names left in the telegraph machine. And on that list was your name and my name together. What kind of a list would have the name of a communist and the name of a bookmaker side by side?”

He never got to answer that question. Because right at that moment, Danny Whizz-Bang came barrelling into the Garrison like he’d been shot out of a cannon! Thomas turned towards him as people shouted in chaos while Danny began throwing chairs and stuff around. Kate had the extreme misfortune to be in his path when that happened, and Danny knocked her onto her back, sending all the mugs of beer into her face as she landed on her side. Well, she wanted some excitement…she was getting some and probably a scar to mark the occasion!

Chapter 6: Cries for help

WHAM!!

Kate felt as if she’d been run over by a charging bull for a second as she got doused in beer! Chairs and glass went everywhere. There was shouting going on, and a chair went flying over her head!! She covered her head and debated her next step. Fortunately, someone grabbed her and pulled her up to her feet!”

“Easy, Miss!” The one said. “I got you!”

She turned as the noise quieted somewhat, at least enough for her to understand what the man was shouting. “They're going to kill me!”

She turned as Tommy and the man he’d been talking to at the bar grabbed hold of the man. “On three! One, two, three, go!” And with that, they took the man down to the ground, and he was still shouting. “Breathe, Danny. Breathe!”

But this man… He was inconsolable. He was broken beyond words as he kept shouting at the top of his lungs. “They're going to kill me! They're going to kill me! They're going to kill me!”

She didn’t really understand what was going on until Tommy spoke. “Danny! Danny, Danny, you're home! We're all home in England. You're not in France!” She then realised at that moment that he was a soldier. He was having what her mother used to call ‘episodes’. Her uncle used to have them…until he jumped off the balcony, dashing his brains out on the rocks below. She remembered watching him jump. Not a sound from his lips as he accepted his ‘peaceful end’ that was anything but peaceful for her. She moved calmly and softly towards the bar to get a mug of water for him. “You're not an artillery shell, Danny; you're a man. Eh? You're not a whizz-bang, you're a human being, Danny. You're all right. You're all right. You're all right.”

The man was now quiet, and his shouts were little sobs now. The man with Tommy helped get this Danny to his feet. “Up, UP!”

She glanced up as Thomas got Danny to his feet. He gripped his shoulder and made eye contact with Danny, softly reassuring him. “It's all right. It's all right.”

Her heart broke as Danny looked around the destroyed bar in confusion. “Oh, hell.” He looked to Thomas for the answers. “Did I do it again?”

Thomas nodded as he said gently. “You did it again, Danny.” No matter how gentle the words were, Danny’s face still crumbled as he broke down in sobs. Tommy grabbed hold of Danny’s head, pulling him close so he could talk softly to him. “You have to stop doing this, man.” She approached as Thomas told the other wary but sympathetic, stoic-faced men in the bar. “He's all right.”

“Oh God, Mr Shelby, I'm sorry.” Danny said as he looked at the mess.

“It's all right.” Thomas assured him. “You go home to your wife now, Danny.”

“Yeah,” Danny said as he began to step away.

“Here.” She said quietly, so as not to startle him. He looked at her in confusion, and she said. “Here’s some water.”

He nodded at her. “Thank you, Miss.”

He took the mug from her and began to drink the water with a shaking hand. A hand around her waist caused her to jump, but she knew it was Thomas’s hand. “Get all that smoke and mud out of your head, eh?”

Danny nodded as Thomas got in front of her, subtly moving her away from Danny. “Yes, Mr Shelby. I'm sorry.”

Thomas nodded as he said. “Go on.” Danny nodded and walked out of the room. She went to move, but Thomas still had ahold of her. He studied her before asking. “You alright?”

She nodded. “Yes, Mr Shelby.”

“You’ve got some glass here.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a handkerchief. He wiped at the glass shards that were littering her hair and shoulders. She had no idea that was all over her. He studied her. “Are you sure you’re ok?”

“Yes, Mr Shelby.”

“Is she alright?” Harry asked.

“She’s got some glass in her hair and on her face, but I don’t see any blood.”

“I’m fine.” She assured him. “Honest.”

He studied her and then said. “You said you wanted some excitement. But, you’ll be sore tomorrow.”

“A little, but I’m fine overall.” She said quietly. “Are you alright?”

He exhaled as he nodded. “I’m fine.”

“Wait.” She said softly as she reached up and touched his face. He jerked slightly, not expecting her to touch him. “You’re bleeding.” She explained. “You’re bleeding.” He exhaled roughly as she used a clean portion of her apron to press it against the corner of his mouth. His left eye had a bruise forming there, and she touched his face gently. He exhaled, and she apologised. “Sorry. You need some ice.”

“I’m fine.”

She shook her head as she wiped at the blood on his mouth. Men and their stubborn pride. A soft touch caused her to look down and see that he’d ‘taken’ hold of her hand. He was technically stroking her hand with his thumb, gently playing with her hand. She could feel him looking at her, but she couldn’t look at him.

“Mr Shelby,” Harry’s voice caused them both to pull apart. She turned away without looking at him and went to repour those three mild beers. “You have to do something about him.”

She bit her lip. The war hadn’t even been over for two months. This man…he was in Hell. He needed time to rest and try to come to terms with the hell that he’d seen. “Damn right, Harry.” The other man said loudly, clearly trying to drive a point across. “You pay the Peaky Blinders a lot of money for protection.” Thomas said nothing as he took his glass of whisky and downed it in one smooth swig. “You're the law around here now, Tommy, aren't you?” Thomas grabbed his hat from the bar counter and moved to leave. “Maybe you should put a bullet in Danny Whizz-Bang’s head like they do with mad horses.”

There was a chill in the air. Kate’s stomach churned, and before she could stop it, the words came flying out of her mouth. “Get out!” Everyone, even Thomas, turned and stared at her. “I am denying you service, so you can just…” Her brain floundered for an eloquent thing to say. But eloquence was going to work right here. “Get the f**k out! Now!”

“Kate,” Harry said. “It’s alright---

“No.” She shook her head. “No, it’s not alright!”

That man looked at her as he said. “This doesn’t concern you. So, stay out of this.”

She tightly gripped the mug of milk in her hand as she spoke tightly. “My uncle was like that. He’d run around, screaming and crying after he fought in the Boer War.” Her stomach boiled as she spoke. “Everyone said, ‘Get it under control.’ ‘Forget it.’” “Let it go and move on” sounds familiar?” She demanded lowly. “On May 31st, 1903, one year to the day that the Boer War ended, he jumped out of his room from the fourth floor.” Silence reigned in the pub as she spoke. “I remember that he was quiet because…he was ‘at peace’. Had anyone actually given a damn, instead of telling him to be silent and stifle the emotions, he’d probably still be alive! The hell that he experienced is swirling around inside him, like a poison, clouding his mind and torturing him! And when you’re poisoned, you induce vomiting! So, maybe instead of saying things like he should get shot in the head, try getting him to talk it out because he is crying out for help! Otherwise, you'll wake up one day and find his brains all over the place. And if that happens, I hope that your words will torment you for the rest of your miserable days!”

There was a long silence, a very long silence, and she didn’t look away from this man. Not until Thomas approached and set a coin on the bar in front of her. She looked at him, and he had another strange look on his face, almost one like admiration, but it felt a little deeper somehow. He nodded at her and said. “Buy yourself a drink.” He then turned to Harry and announced. “Bring the bill to the Peaky Blinders. We'll take care of it.” He paused and said. “And Freddie…you’ve been cut off for the day. So get the f**k out.”

A strange tension filled the air. Freddie, he drew himself up and stared Tommy down. After a good few moments, Freddie paid for his drink and then followed Thomas out of the bar! The room resumed murmuring lowly as she turned and put the three mugs of milk on the tray. After serving the drinks to the men, she turned to help Harry straighten up the fallen tables. After a few moments, Harry said. “Tommy doesn’t buy drinks for anyone.”

She blinked. “Really?”

“Yes. Whenever he wants something, just put it on the house. Ok?”

“Yes, sir.”

After a few moments, Harry took her elbow and guided her towards the bar. She frowned as he said. “Look…you’re a very nice girl. God knows what you’re doing in a place like this, but Birmingham isn’t a safe place.” She nodded in understanding. “Men, like Tommy Shelby, are dangerous. They have a lot of power.”

She nodded. “I surmised as much.”

He exhaled as he said. “I’m only saying this to warn you. You’re a very friendly girl, so I’m only saying this to warn you. If he decided that he wants you, then there's nothing anybody could do about it.”

She frowned as she asked. “Wanted me how?”

Harry let out a sharp exhale as he said lowly. “If he decided to take you to his bed,” she gasped in shock as she understood what he meant. “You’d have to go.”

“I will not!” She declared, causing Harry to stare at her. “Furthermore, I do not believe that Mr Shelby is the kind of man who would force himself on an unwilling woman.”

“You don’t know him. If he wanted you, you’d go, and that’d be that. Lucky for you, since he got back from France, Tommy doesn't want anybody at all.”

She exhaled as she said. “Well, the war just ended in November. If he got back here in December, it’s only been around a month. Maybe, he doesn’t just…jump into beds with whoever.” Harry snorted. “Or, perhaps, he keeps his personal life private. I appreciate the warning, but it was unnecessary to reveal Mr Shelby’s…proclivities.” Harry looked confused. She cleared her throat and said. “Shall I sweep the floor, Sir?”

“Yeah.” Harry nodded. “But I am warning you… If he’s paying for your drinks, he’s got an eye on you. So, just be careful, alright?”

She nodded. “I will be careful, but I really do not believe that Mr Shelby is as you describe him to be. I know that he’s dangerous, but… I also believe that men like him have a code, and he would not cross a line like that.”

Harry shook his head as he said. “Kate…you were brought up among gentlemen and society.” She stilled at his words. “Anyone can see it, in the way you talk and move. There’s nothing wrong with that, but…done here, it’s very different. It’s very dangerous, and people down here…they’d cut you for a penny.” She stared at Harry in surprise. “Tommy Shelby, he’d cut you for looking at him the wrong way. His family, they’d think about it first before doing it. Not him. So… I just want you to be careful. Ok?”

She nodded as she said. “I’ll be careful.”

And she was.

She worked all day, carrying drinks, collecting money and cleaning up after the men. All the men were respectful towards her, but she had a suspicion that it was because of something that Tommy had said. She didn’t believe Harry. Thomas wasn’t the kind of man who’d force himself on an unwilling woman. She knew this because if he’d wanted to force her, he’d have forced her into his bed last night. He could have ordered her to lie on the bed last night and taken her after removing her corset. A dishonourable man would have been like that. He hadn’t shown any signs of being that kind of man.

When Finn came running over around noon with a wrapped tongue and mustard sandwich, everyone had stared at her for a moment. Clearly wondering what she’d done to earn favour in the eyes of the Shelby family.

“Tommy said he’ll pick you up at 11!” The boy declared loudly before running out of the Garrison, leaving everyone staring at her once again. This was going to be a long day for her, and now, everyone would be adding to the unspoken gossip about her and Thomas Shelby.

Chapter 7: Hands touch

He was late. It was nearly midnight, and he was late picking Kate up.

The family meeting had gone ‘alright’ if he ignored Arthur’s words. Ignoring Polly was another matter. She knew something was up, so she asked him to meet her in the church. There, he confessed his greatest sin. How his men had picked up all those machine guns. She wanted him to get rid of them, saying that he had his mother’s good sense. He probably did, but for this occasion, his father’s devilry won out. Devilry was needed when it came to business. The good sense that he applied towards Kate. She needed someone to look out for her, and he was going to do that.

She was…interesting. He’d never known a woman to manage the art of saying so much while sharing nothing about herself. It made her a curiosity in his eyes, and loath to admit it, he was intrigued by her. She was unlike any other woman that he’d met before, and he wanted to protect her. But at the same time, he could see that she’d been smothered by her ‘family’, and she wanted to try her own way in the world. Underneath all her fears, there was an independent woman struggling to get out from underneath whatever hole she’d been buried under. He admired that, the way she moved past her fears and traded in everything familiar for the great unknown.

He approached the Garrison and saw that it was dark. There were no lights on. A quick look at the back showed that she wasn’t in the back. So, he went to the front of the building… and his heart stopped at the sight of her body sprawled in the doorway of the Garrison. His cigarette fell from his lips as he raced over to her body, his heart pounding in his chest as he knelt beside her.

He couldn’t see anything in the dark, so he shook her gently. “Kate? Kate, can you hear me?” She moaned and stirred under him. “Kate?”

“Hmm?” She said softly as he reached into his pocket for a lighter. He held the flame over her body as she made a face at the light. “Too bright.”

“Are you alright?” He demanded. “Were you robbed?”

“No.” She tried sitting up. “You said…11,” and I sat down. I must have fallen asleep.”

“Asleep?” His heart began to slow down as he realised that she was just exhausted. It had been her first day working, and she had never worked a day in her life. He was 30 minutes late, so she’d fallen asleep. He exhaled as he said. “Come here.” She let out a soft sound as he pulled her to her feet. She caught hold of his elbows, and he stood there for a moment, letting her wake herself up. “Are you sure you’re alright? No one hurt you?”

“No one hurt me.” She said quietly. “No one touched me either.”

“Good.” He didn’t want to let her go. She felt right; she felt good in his arms, and for the moment that she let him hold her, he relished it. Everything around him was dark and dying. She was like this one stubborn light that refused to burn out. She yawned again, and he knew he had to get her back. “Come on, let’s get you back.”

“Yes, Mr Shelby.”

She yawned again, and he asked. “Tired?”

“Yes.” She nodded. “I-I haven’t…slept well for a few years.”

“Why?” he asks her straight. She’ll dance around the question, but she’ll dance honestly.

She inhaled as she said. “I don’t know. My doctors never really said.” She said doctors, like she had more than one. “My mother…had them prescribe opium, and I—I never got used to it. Always made me feel so strange. Each dream was like a fever.” Her voice got soft. “I couldn’t get out of them. I haven’t slept like this since I was a kid. It feels…nice to be so exhausted that I can just fall asleep anywhere.”

So, she needed to work. It sounded like she was just restless and fed up with her life. The opium, while it calmed him down, would have made her anxious. It explained a lot. “How was the first day?”

“It was good.” She said simply.

He nodded. “You gave Freddie an earful.” She nodded again. “Is that true, what you said about your uncle?”

“Yes.” She said simply, with no signs of lies or untruth in her voice. “I was in my teens when I saw it happen.”

“You saw it?” He enquired.

She nodded. “He didn’t make a sound when he jumped. I always felt…that my parents killed him with their words.” She shivered and wrapped her arms closer to her body. “I remember…him crying in the night. Felt so strange when it was quiet every night afterwards.”

“Were you close?” He asked.

“We used to be.” She inhaled as she said. “He’d bring me chocolates every year for my birthday. My mother never allowed me to have sweets, so every night before I went to bed. He’d make sure that there was a box of chocolates underneath my pillow.” Her eyes darkened as she said. “After the war…I wasn’t permitted to be near him, and my parents had my room watched. He just…couldn’t take it anymore and killed himself.”

He was silent before saying. “Nothing’s going to happen to Danny.”

She bit her lip and said. “I hope so, but right now…it’s like looking in a mirror of the past and not being able to stop it from repeating itself.”

He didn’t like that. Danny wouldn’t kill himself; he knew that. None of them were going to kill themselves. That was the coward's way out. Still, for her sake, he’d tell Danny’s wife what Kate said. They weren’t going to reach Danny. If Kate’s words were true, his wife might just have a shot. He nodded. “I’ll have a word with his wife.”

“Thank you.” He nodded, and they continued walking down the street together. Their hands brushed…and just like before, her touch sent a spark through his cold body. She inhaled, and he glanced at her. Their hands brushed again. This time she pulled her hand away from him and stuck her hand in her pocket.

That irritated him. He looked at her and watched as she opened and closed her mouth a few times before biting her lip. Something was on her mind. She wanted to say something; he could see it, but she was holding whatever it was back. He wanted to know why she wasn’t letting him touch her. He hadn’t done anything to her…yet. “You have something to say to me?”

She bit her lip and shook her head. “No.”

She was lying, so he decided to call her on it. “You’re not a very good liar.” She instantly stopped dead in her tracks at his words. He exhaled before saying. “You may as well say it. I can feel it churning in your head.”

She bit her lip as she said. “It’s not me wanting to say something. It’s just,” she inhaled. “I was told something today, and…” I know it’s not true, and I… I just can’t imagine someone thinking that you---

“What’d they say?” He asked her.

“It was just a lie.”

“Yet, it’s f**king bothering you.” He points out. “Just say it.”

She bit her lip and inhaled before saying nervously. “I was told that…if you demanded it,” she gripped her fingers so tightly that for a moment he was sure that she was going to break her own fingers. He reached over and grabbed her hand, trying to stop her from snapping her own fingers. “that I-I should…have to submit to you even if it be against my will.”

He frowned. “What’s against your will?”

She inhaled and spluttered out. “Allowing you to use my body as you pleased.”

Now he understood it. Someone had told her that if he wanted to f**k her, she had to spread her legs for him. She must have been stressed about that all day, judging by how nervous she was now. He inhaled, trying to find a calm before asking her, but he’d used up his calmness with Polly and Arthur. “Who told you that?” She didn’t answer him. He gripped her chin and made her look up at him. “Who said that?”

“Are you going to kill him?” She asked, her voice trembling slightly. He was surprised that she had the guts to ask him to his face. She inhaled as she said. “I know that you wouldn’t, at least… I’d like to think that you wouldn’t force me to…engage in activities outside of matrimony. But---

Her voice faded, so he asked. “But what?”

She inhaled as she said. “I find…myself to be an occasional poor judge of character. So… I’d like that small percentage of me that’s unsure to be satisfied.”

He shook his head. She believed that he wouldn’t rape her but wanted to silence the voice in her head. “I don’t need to force a woman into my bed.” He said lowly. “Women crawl freely into my bed readily enough, especially if I pay them for it.”

Her pretty little face flamed red at his words. “Oh.”

God, he wanted to kiss those red lips of hers, which had to have been untasted. No man had ever touched her, kissed her or got between those virgin legs of hers. “So, if you want me to f**k you, Kate…you only have to ask.” She stared up at him, as if she were going to pass out. “So,” he rasped against her face. “How about you open those legs of yours?” She jolted violently at his words. “And let me be the man that turns you into a woman?”

“I-I,” she stammers… They amused him far more than he wanted her to admit. She’d practically torn Freddie’s head off for suggesting that he put a bullet in Danny’s head. Yet, here he was, offering to take her to his bed and take her innocence from her. In truth, he’d expected outrage, fury and angry words. He wasn’t expecting her to be confused. Confusion meant that… A small part of her wanted to be with him, and she didn’t know how to handle that. Christ, if she wanted him…she was the kind of woman that would f**k up a man’s life for good, and he didn’t need any more distractions. “No.” She said uneasily. “I-I don’t want to do that.”

He didn’t believe her, not for a long shot. Still, he’d go along with her wishes for now. One day… This woman was going to let him be the first, and what a day that would be. He nodded at her. “That’s all you had to say, Kate.”

She blinked as he released her chin. “Really?”

“Yes.” He held her gaze. “I just finished f**king someone else. I’m good for the night. I don’t need to f**k you.”

She looked a little hurt by his words. In truth, he hadn’t f**ked anyone. He thought about it, but… He felt alright tonight. He didn’t need anyone. Not when he had her, even though there was nothing going on between him and Kate as of yet. “ Oh. Harry said that you---

“So it was Harry then.” Kate instantly gasped and covered her mouth, her face going pale. “It’s alright, I won’t kill him for that.”

“I didn’t mean to---

“I know.” He held her gaze. “What did he say?”

“That you…hadn’t wanted anyone since France.”

Well, that was true. At least, it had been. “Well,” he exhaled as he said. “Harry doesn’t know everything.” She shifted in discomfort. “Still, if you change your mind about what I said earlier---

“I won’t.”

She would. He knew it. It wasn’t that he could see it or feel it; it was something that he knew. She was going to be his. “Still, if you change your mind…then you say the word and I’ll oblige you. You don’t have to worry about me forcing you. I don’t do that kind of thing.”

“Thank you for clarifying, Mr Shelby.”

“You know my name. Use it.” If she called him Mr Shelby one more time… He was going to lose his mind.

She stared at him before speaking to him in the most musical voice that he’d ever heard a woman use before. “Thomas.”

He looked at her for a long time before holding out his hand to her. “Come on.” She slid her hand into his without even thinking this time. As they walked down the street towards his home, it occurred to him that she was right where she belonged.

With him.

Chapter 8: Eggy bread

One week later,

---

“What are you doing?” Kate dropped the spatula and spun around to find Thomas Shelby just inches away from her face! She took a step back and burnt her finger on the stove! Thomas instantly grabbed her and pulled her away from the stove. “I got you.”

“You,” she exhaled hotly. “God, you scared me!”

“Didn’t you hear me?”

“No!” She said as he moved her to the sink, turned the water on and held her hand underneath the running water. She hissed lightly. “You move…like a cat.”

“Hmm.”

That was all he said. That man was allergic to saying things that were on his mind. But, on the other hand, sometimes he’d say something, and it’d be the most shocking thing that a man could ever say to a person! The oddest thing was that he didn’t care! He said whatever was on his mind because that was a part of him. He was himself all the time; he didn’t change for anyone, and she admired that. To be honest, it was rather refreshing to see a man not put on any pretences and make a fool of himself trying to impress her. He was rude, but his rudeness was mostly due to his blunt and direct way of speaking. God, if he’d ever met her mother, she’d have ordered him to be shot! Her father…well, it didn’t matter what her father thought because there was no way that he and her parents would ever meet.

“Thank you.” She said as she pulled her hand free of his. He handed her a towel, and she began to pat her hand dry.

“What are you doing?”

She inhaled as she said. “Everyone’s been so kind that…I used my pay for a cookbook and some food.”

His brow arched. “Is that so?”

She nodded. “Yes. I made eggy bread.”

“It’s burning,” he said dryly. Kate gasped and pushed him away to get to the pan. He let out a laugh as she grabbed the bread with her bare hand, dropped it on the floor and grabbed the other one! He shook his head as she dropped that piece on the floor. “Christ, you’re a f**king disaster.”

“Sorry.” She used her skirt to move the pan off the burner.

“It’s alright.” His hand covered hers, and he moved her away from the stove. “Looks like you only burnt the last two pieces.”

She exhaled as she said. “I was trying not to burn anything at all.”

“You did well.” He said as he ran his hand over hers. “No one really makes breakfast around here anymore.”

“I noticed.” She said quietly.

“Hmm.” He said it right in her ear, causing her to inhale sharply. She was just contemplating moving when he said. “Ever been to a fair, Kate?”

She blinked. “A fair?”

He nodded. “Yes. A fair. We’re taking Finn. Why don’t you go upstairs and get changed? I’ll win you a f**king cap or something.”

She had no clue what he was talking about. “I can’t change.” She said. “This is the only other dress I have.”

He nodded quietly before asking. “Did you eat?”

“Yes.”

“Right, get your coat; let’s go get you something else.”

THIS!! Things like this are what made him even more complex to understand. He had a family to support. He’d done enough for her, getting her a job and making sure that she was safe. He did not need to go around walking her to and from work. After she’d fallen asleep in the doorway, he had Harry give her a key so she could safely wait inside. After that first time, he was never late. He was early sometimes, and he had a drink while waiting for her to finish up the last few details before he took her back. Some nights he even brought her some food, which she ate as they walked back to the house. She felt comfortable around him, which was strange. She wasn’t this comfortable with any man, not even her father.

“What’s this?” A woman with dark, sharp eyes asked as she came into the room. Kate instantly jumped and managed to finally get away from Thomas and his closeness. The woman crossed her arms and asked. “Who is this?”

Thomas exhaled as he said. “Poll, this is Kate.”

“Kate who?” she asked. “And why was I just informed that this woman has been living here for almost a week!”

Kate blanched at those words. Thomas mentioned he had an aunt; this had to be here and now…she was concerned at how he’d basically hidden her from the matriarch of the family. At that moment the front door opened and Arthur came in, along with John. “Tommy?”

“Kitchen.” He said without looking away from Polly. “Kate made breakfast for everyone.”

“F**king hell, that’s nice!” Arthur and John came in. “What’s this?”

“Eggy bread,” she croaked.

Thomas exhaled as he took her hand. “Come on, let’s go.”

“Hold on,” Polly said firmly. “You’re not just walking her out of here like all of this just didn’t happen!”

“Poll,” Thomas said firmly. “She’s never been to a fair. Once Finn and these two eat, we’re going. So, don’t you go questioning the f**k out of her. Talk to Ada.”

Polly’s brow arched. “A woman has been living under this roof for a week, and no one’s told me anything!”

“We’ve been busy.”

Kate inhaled as she said. “I promise, nothing inappropriate---

“Kate,” Thomas cut her off. “outside. Now.”

She inhaled as she said. “I don’t want to cause problems.”

“Then go outside.” He said, his tone broaching no argument. So, she did as he told her. When she walked outside, she could hear voices before she stepped outside. She hadn’t been out for longer than five minutes when Thomas came outside. He exhaled and jerked his head to the side. “Follow me.”

She inhaled as she followed him. “Mr. Shelby----

“I thought,” he turned towards her. “That there was an agreement that you not call me that anymore.”

“It’s your name, Thomas.”

His gaze was almost terrifying as he said firmly. “So is Thomas.”

Her heart fluttered in her stomach. “I don’t wish to cause trouble between you and your family. Not after your kindness to me.”

“Then don’t go running off.” He said. “Poll’s just being Poll. She blows up once in a while; it doesn’t mean anything. Just the way she is.”

She inhaled as she asked him. “Are you sure that’s all it is?”

“Yeah.” He gripped her chin and held her gaze. “She’s like this with every woman that we meet. No need for her to come on down on you like that.”

So, he was protecting her. That’s why he’d shooed her out. She exhaled as she said. “Alright, but, please…I don’t want to cause trouble. So, don’t ruin your relationship with your family on account of me. I won’t be here long enough for…her to be concerned about me. At least, pass that along to her.”

He was silent a moment before saying. “I don’t have to tell her anything.” He released her chin, and Kate exhaled, not realising that she’d been holding her breath. “Come on,” she said nothing. She let him take her hand and walk her down the streets. Once they were on the street with all the stores, he banged on the door of one.

The door opened after a few minutes, and there stood a dishevelled-looking woman. Her eyes widened. “Mr Shelby!”

“She needs a new dress.” He said as he practically pushed her inside. “Get her something. We leave in five minutes.”

“But---

“Inside Kate.”

He closed the door behind her, causing her to jump. She inhaled as she turned to the stunned woman. “I’m sorry. I didn’t realise that they’d be---

“Let’s find you something to wear.” The woman said quickly. “Something nice.”

“I don’t need a dress.” She assured her. “A new blouse and skirt is more than enough. Honest.”

“He said a dress.”

“I know, but…if I tell him it’s what I liked, he’ll be fine with it. Honest.”

The woman exhaled as she looked at her. “Well, I can at least get you something attractive. I have just the outfit. It’s a little old, but no one around here wanted it.”

“That’s alright,” she assured her. “I don’t want to draw attention to myself.”

The woman snorted. “You’re walking around with Thomas Shelby. Everyone notices you.”

Her face heated as she said. “We’re not together in any capacity.”

“Sure.” The woman said as she grabbed a white blouse and a teal skirt. “Here. Try this on.”

Kate nodded and ducked behind a curtain. It took her a few moments to get a hang of the skirt, but she liked the feel of the dress. It made her feel…sexy somehow. A word that she didn’t normally associate with herself. But when she looked in the mirror, she finally felt as if she were a beautiful woman. She undid the braid, letting her hair hang down her back. She twisted it away from her face and then tied her hair in a half-up ponytail. She liked this outfit. It made her look tall, emphasised her waist and made her look like she actually had breasts.

She smiled at the saleslady. “I’ll take this one.”

“Comes with a jacket.”

She took the little bolero-style jacket. “Thank you.” She then walked out to where Thomas was calmly smoking a cigarette. The door opened, he turned, and he just stood there, staring at her. She cleared her throat, trying not to appear affected as this strange sensation began to blossom in her stomach. It was…as if a carbonated drink was flowing through her stomach and her heart. “I’m ready.”

He nodded, and after a few moments, she cleared her throat and told the lady behind her. “I want a few more things sent over to the house.”

She shook her head. “I can’t afford---

“It’s on the house.” He said as he shot the woman a look. “Right?”

The woman nodded. “Yes, Mr Shelby.”

She shook her head. “No. It’s not. She has a livelihood to make---

“And her husband has failed to make several payments for protection.” 'Thomas', he said tightly as he shot that woman a look. “Give her enough clothes that’ll cover the payments for six months. Understood?”

The woman actually smiled a little bit. “Yes, Mr Shelby.”

He turned to her and snapped his fingers. “Come on.”

She shook her head. “I am not a dog, Mr Shelby.”

“Believe me, Kate,” he said tightly. “I’m completely aware that you’re a woman!”

She stared at him. He was…in a strange mood this morning, so she just decided to let it go. Then she remembered that she had a job! “I can’t go with you.” He didn’t even look at her. “I can’t leave Harry---

“Already sent word that you were taking the day off.” He said. “Most people will be at the fair, so it’ll be a slow day.”

“You can’t do that!” she stated. He rolled those eyes of his. “I’m serious. In the future, it would be proper for you to ask me if I wished to be in your company.”

“You do.”

Her jaw dropped. “Excuse me?!”

“You’ve never been to a fair, Kate. There are horses, games, dancing, drinking and all kinds of sinful things that don’t happen in your world.” He glanced at her. “Doesn’t come around much, so you don’t want to miss it.”

She groaned as she said. “God! You…you’re the most confusing man that I’ve ever met.”

“What do you think you do to me, Kate?” He asked, causing the blood to chill in her veins. “Eh?”

She stared at him before saying. “Nothing.”

“Well, you’re f**king wrong.” That…made no sense to her. In his world, she was a barmaid, and he was a man of power. She should mean absolutely nothing to a man like him. She shouldn’t be doing anything to him! They walked back out to the house to see everyone was just starting to walk out of the house. He cleared his throat and said. “Get in the car.” She went to the back, but his hand closed over hers as she reached for the handle. “Front seat.”

She said nothing as she bit her lip and got into the car. His family shot themselves looks before they all moved to get in. Arthur, John and Finn all crammed themselves into the backseat. Ada and Polly waved at them as they pulled away. Not a word was said, but from the look in Polly’s eyes, Kate knew that her interrogation was far from over. Polly would be waiting for her when she got back.

---

Chapter 9: Two for one

It was a cloudy morning as they drove down the road.

On a day that should have been ‘fun’ was tense. She was wearing a plain skirt and blouse… but she might as well be dripping in diamonds. Every day, her beauty seemed to grow with each look. And he didn’t mean just her looks; she was growing as a person. He’d been so worried about her when she started working at the Garrison, but it had been the making of her. She’d started growing in confidence and finding her voice. But with that voice came out some sass and attitude. Not that he minded; a little bit of fire meant that she’d bring warmth to his cold life. By God, was he f**king cold.

He wanted to touch her, but not in front of his brothers. She wouldn’t appreciate that, and he wouldn’t have them chiding her. Today, he had to start a war first to get ahead. He had plans now, and he needed money. Because his future was starting to rapidly involve her. While she was now accepting a down-to-earth lifestyle, she’d been raised on grand things. He needed to be able to give her a good life, and he didn’t want her working. He wanted her to be able to rest, relax and enjoy life around her. She couldn’t do that until he had enough to support her properly. His mother worked every day of her life. His Kate wouldn’t.

“I thought you said we were going to the fair.” Arthur said from the backseat as they pulled into a field where Johnny Dogs was waiting for them.

“We have business first.” He said simply as he parked the car. “Come on. Bring your wits.”

“What business?” Arthur asked as Thomas went around the front to get Kate’s door for her. She was already halfway out.

“That's the Lee family,” John observed.

Thomas lit a cigarette as Johnny shouted. “Tommy!”

“Johnny-dogs!” Kate closed the car door and stood awkwardly there, looking like a rose in the middle of a field of mud.

“Tommy, how the hell are you?”

“All the better for getting the city smoke out of my lungs,” he said as Johnny shook his hand vigorously.

“I thought you became a bit too grand for us!” Johnny said jovially.

“I've been busy.”

“Yeah.” Johnny said as he looked directly at Kate. “I can see why!” Kate went red as Johnny asked. “How’d you ever get yourself such a fancy woman, Tom?”

He exhaled as he said simply. “She got in my car.”

“And I’m not his woman!” Kate said sharply, causing all the men to look at her and then back to him.

Johnny cleared his throat as he said. “I'm riding with the Lee family now.”

“I heard. Myself, I'd rather live among pigs.” Erasmus Lee looked at him, and Tommy knew that he’d been heard. Good.

“Come on, Tommy, no disputing.”  Johnny said quickly, desperate to try and avoid the inevitable fight. “So your first fair since France?”

“What do you know about France?” he asked dryly. “You war-shy, gipsy bastard.” Johnny grinned at him. In a way, he wasn’t mad at Johnny for not going. He needed a few people around him who were untouched by the shadow of war. “So this is the horse?”

Johnny said approvingly. “And that's the car.”

The horse was beautiful. He brushed the white mane so he could get a better look at the eyes. Yes, this horse had some spirit in him. He ran his hand down the leg, and the horse brought the hoof up so he could check it. Yes, he had good feet. He straightened up and saw Kate had moved closer to him. She jerked her gaze away from him. She was mad at him, but she’d get over it. “Come here.” He said as he held out a hand for her. She ignored his hand, but she walked up to the horse. He could tell from the way she ran her hand along the horse’s back that she knew horses. “You ride?”

She nodded. “Yes.”

That was good. He liked riding, and it’d be nice if his wife had an appreciation for horses as well. She rubbed the horse’s nose, and the horse sniffed at her. Kate smiled before resting her forehead against that of the horse. The tension left her shoulders as she closed her eyes. He watched her for a moment, just taking in the sight of her.

“Hang on a minute,” Arthur said suddenly. “You're not swapping the family car for a bloody horse.”

“Of course we're not swapping it!” Johnny stated as he walked back to Tommy with his hands in his pockets. “Huh? That'd be mad.”

“We're going to play two up.”

“Oh, f**k!!” Arthur said dramatically, nearly causing Thomas to start laughing.

He and Johnny pulled out their coins. They both showed the other side of the coin to prove that they weren’t double-headed. He looked at Johnny and said. “Heads.”

Johnny nodded. “Tails.”

And with that…they both flipped their coins in the air and waited for them to fall. After a moment, they both knelt and examined the coins. Heads. He’d called it right; the horse was his. He and Johnny both picked up their money and pocketed it. After spitting and shaking on the deal, Johnny winked at him. Yes, they were going to have a little bit of fun at Arthur’s expense. He handed Johnny the keys to the car. “Here you are.”

“Yeah, I knew it!” Arthur said loudly, a little too loudly. “See, I knew it. Tommy, you bloody idiot.”

“Shut up, Arthur, I won,” he ordered before turning back to where Kate was still petting the horse. She smiled a little at his words. “I promised Johnny I'd let him have a spin in the car if he lost.”

“All right,” Arthur said quietly.

However, it may have been normal, but it sounded quiet because the Lees were laughing. Which was exactly what he wanted them to do. “Are you Lee boys laughing at my brother?” They just smirked at him, so he moved towards them. They stepped towards him, like the foolish idiots they were. “Are you? Eh?”

Tommy! ” Johnny came running down the hill behind him. “Tommy, come on!”

“I asked you a question!” He stated as Arthur and John fell into step behind him.

“Tommy, come on, it's just the craic.” It wasn’t. “Get your family out of here, and go and enjoy yourselves at the fair before they start a war. Huh? Look. You've got a pretty girl with you. Take her to the fair with a clean face.” That was a fair request. He looked at Kate. She was staring at him now, her face pale. She hated violence. Violence was all he knew, though. Johnny turned towards Erasmus and the others. Go on. Go. They’re from good people. Their grandad was a king. Their grandad was a king!

That he was. For the moment, things seemed peaceable. So, he turned and began to walk up the hill. Then one of the Lees…opened their mouth and started the war. “Yeah, but his mum was a didicoy whore!”

He stopped dead in his tracks. He vaguely heard Kate gasp as he took off his hat, turned and slashed the eyes of Manfri Lee. The oaf went down with a blood-curdling scream. After that, everything became a blur of screeching violins and shouting. He, Arthur and John attacked all three of the Lees. John gives the other man a Glasgow cut. He felt nothing as all three of them stood there, breathing in a fury, looking down at the three men they attacked. Only when he turned towards Kate and saw her pale face did he feel something. He shouldn’t have done that in front of her. He knew why she hated violence, and he knew that she wanted to help, but this…it was out of her hands, and he knew that she was feeling guilty as hell even though she hadn’t participated in this beating.

He picked up his hat and moved towards her. She was crying softly; her face was pale as he moved towards her. She shook her head as she said. “Mr. Shelby---

He’d had enough of that. He grabbed her face gently, tilted her chin up and kissed those damn lips of hers. Kate went still and limp in his arms. There was no protesting, no fighting; she just stood there and let him kiss her. He pulled her seemingly willing body close to his and kissed her with a passion. He felt alive again. This huge bolt of lightning fell from the sky and brought life back to his body again. He remembered her relaying that Harry said that he’d not wanted anyone at all. He hadn’t realised that to be true until this moment because he wanted her. He wanted Kate with such a passion that he was contemplating moving her into Johnny’s waggon, locking the door behind him and just taking her!!

Kate suddenly pulled away from him, and he looked at her. She was crying. He wasn’t expecting that. She was crying and had a hand over her shaking lips. Actually, she wasn’t crying. She was hyperventilating, and he realised that he’d let his body take over his head. He knew she was innocent. No man had touched her before, so it was a pretty safe bet that she’d never been kissed before. He’d just grabbed her and kissed her like it was their wedding night! His passion had undoubtedly scared her to death. It was just a kiss, but kisses meant something to a woman like her. They were special gifts that she probably treasured. He was a peaky blinder, and he took what he wanted. He wanted her.

He exhaled as he said. “Kate---

She shook her head and ran back to the car. He didn’t blame her! She got in the car, closed the door and leaned forward with her eyes covered and her shoulders shaking. She was crying, but this time it was because of what he’d done to her. He’d scared her, and he hadn’t even given her a moment to get her wits about her after seeing him. She saw him for the first time. It was then that he realised what it was that she’d seen. She saw him attack the Lees, and the assault had been brutal. He didn’t even bother protecting her from seeing that. He should have had her go into the waggon for a few minutes. Instead, he let her see the monster that he was, and that had certainly terrified her. Then, he’d grabbed her and kissed her, once again scaring her. He knew that she had a dark and hidden past, so he shouldn’t have done that to her.

“Tommy!” Johnny ran up to him and shook his head. “You shouldn’t have f**king done that!”

He turned and gave Johnny a firm look that said he had no remorse for them. “Then they oughtn’t to have said that, should they?” Johnny had no answer for that. He exhaled as he said. “Uncle Charlie’ll be here in two hours. He’ll pick up the horse. Make sure he’s ready to go by then. Ok?”

Johnny nodded. “Sure! Whatever you say, Tom!”

Tommy threw out his cigarette and got into the car. “Are we going to the fair now?” Finn asked as Arthur and John got in the car as well. Both were laughing loudly, adrenaline running high through their veins at the moment.

“Yeah, we f**king are!!” John said loudly as he tousled Finn’s hair. Thomas started the engine and got back on the road.

Kate was looking out the window. Her left elbow was on the window, her left hand over her mouth while her right hand gripped her knee. Her hands were shaking hard, and tears were trickling down her cheeks silently. Unable to see her like this, he reached out and grabbed her right hand. She let out half a sob and covered her mouth tighter. Just when he was considering letting her go…she grabbed his hand tighter. She was upset, but she wanted him close. That meant one thing, and he hated doing this kind of thing.

He had to talk to her. Because if she wanted him as much as he wanted her, there was no reason for her to be in tears.

---

Just a reminder.

---

---

It's the only way that I get 'paid'. 

Chapter 10: A moment of weakness

She didn’t know what the hell happened to her as they bumped along the road to the fair. Each bump caused her to nestle closer to Thomas, and him being close to her was the last thing that she needed after that moment between them.

A moment of weakness.

That seemed like such a small thing to describe it as. She wasn’t sure about it. It had been such a strange day with his aunt’s reaction to her being in the house. She hadn’t realised that it’d be a problem, but it had been. She had a feeling that Thomas had shooed her out of the house because he said something to his aunt that he didn’t want her to overhear. She thought it had been an argument. Now, she wondered if it had been a declaration of his feelings towards her. But there couldn’t be any feelings between them. Could there? They barely knew each other! At least, she thought they barely knew each other.

Yes, she saw him every morning and evening. They talked on the way back. She knew that he was the second oldest in the family and the most intelligent. He hadn’t finished school. He was a soldier, and he’d earned medals that he’d thrown in the river. That hadn’t surprised her. She could see that he carried the scars of war with him still. His scars weren’t as cemented in his mind as her uncle’s had been, but they were there. Watching him in action today had only made that clearer for her. When he’d fought…he’d changed. He wasn’t the Thomas Shelby that she knew.

He’d become a different man in that moment. It was his eyes that had bothered her. She’d seen a lack of emotions in his eyes at most times. Softness on occasion, anger as well, but it was the emptiness that had scared her. He’d become a machine in that moment. Like he’d turned a switch off inside himself. Then he’d walked towards her, shaking off his hat from the ground. He had blood on his hat and his hand as well. She’d tried telling him that…but she never got the chance to do so. He just grabbed hold of her face and kissed her.

No one had ever kissed her before. In fact, she couldn’t even remember her parents kissing her goodnight as a child. No one had kissed her when she was a teenager, and when she became of marriageable age, she was very closely chaperoned. No man ever got close to her the way that Thomas Shelby had, and he frightened her. This…was such a terrible and frightening feeling that for that moment she understood why her parents never kissed or touched.

Then, that feeling faded, and it changed along with his kiss. He pulled her close, pressing his body so close to hers that she could feel warmth radiating from his body. That fear that she’d been feeling faded from her as this light, this warmth and this feeling that she could only describe as lovely filled her. The world changed for her in that moment. He changed. Her heart swelled, and the world seemed to become beautiful. She felt safe and appreciated. She wasn’t just the heir to the throne. She was a woman, and this man wanted her because of who she was. Not what she was.

The moment that thought occurred to her, she was jolted back into reality. She couldn’t do this to him. There was no way that she’d ever be allowed to have a relationship with Thomas Shelby! It was impossible! He was a ‘commoner’! Regardless of him being such an exemplary man, he wouldn’t fit into her world even if he were allowed into it. She wouldn’t be allowed to go to his world. She was the sole heir to the throne. There were no other blood relatives to take her place, and were she to leave…the whole kingdom would just collapse! She had too big a responsibility to thousands of people. Walking away from them just because she was falling in love----

LOVE?!

That realisation had made her pull away from him. Her heart broke as they looked at each other. She could see that he was beyond confused, and that made her feel even worse! He didn’t deserve this! He was, at the core of him, a very good man. He had a good sense of honour, and he protected people who needed it. He loved his family. Yes, he was dangerous, but he was ambitious as well. He had dreams. He was gentle towards her, very protective and tender, even loving towards her. But she couldn’t have that.

The whole time they’d ridden in the car, he’d held onto her hand. He knew that he’d want to talk to her as soon as they were alone, and she didn’t know what to say to him! How could she explain any of this to him? She couldn’t fall in love with him, nor could she marry him! He was absolutely perfect for her in literally every other way that mattered to her. But he wasn’t royalty, and his lack of royal blood is what would keep them apart. Her happiness would mean nothing to her family. His family wouldn’t have any place in the palace, and their lives would be scrutinised severely. To fall in love with him…it would be nothing but a disaster for all of them.

They arrived at the fair, and she decided to stay away from Thomas as best she could so as not to give him any encouragement. He’d held her hand for the thirty minutes it took to get to the fair, so no more unnecessary contact. But dear God, Thomas was persistent! He refused to let her out of his line of sight. He didn’t say anything, but she could feel him watching her. He walked beside her, quietly smoking his cigarette as if nothing had happened between them. His brothers all kept trying to get away from her. It was as if they were under some unspoken order to leave her with Tommy. But she wouldn’t be left alone with him if she could help it. But it wasn’t an easy task.

First, they walked around the fair. It was small, so it wouldn’t take them more than an hour to do everything. Finn wanted to play horseshoes, but they didn’t let him. Said it was a waste of money. Thomas bought her a candy apple, using it as an excuse to touch her. She didn’t like the taste of it and gave it to Finn, who was delighted. Thomas had been good about it and remembered that she said she liked chocolates. Chocolate wasn’t available at the fair though. Thomas had bought her some warm cider, which she did love. They walked around the fair, looking at all the booths, and she kept trying to stay close to Arthur and John.

However, when they arrived at the shooting gallery, she’d got distracted. Thomas had paid for a round and hit all the targets. His prize…had been a small jar of violets for her. He was just bound and determined to break both their hearts by trying to get close to her. She found a shilling in her purse, picked up the rifle and shot at the targets. She hit each one because shooting was something that she was required to know.

“Well, you’re just full of f**king surprises, aren’t you?” Thomas asked as she picked out the small jar of buttercups. “Where’d you learn how to shoot?”

“Home.” She kept her answers simple. “It was required.”

She turned to look for Arthur and John…but they were gone. Her heart began to pound in fear and terror as she realised that they were alone. “I sent them off,” Thomas said as he read her mind. “They’re on the other side of the fair.” She wrapped her arms around herself and moved through the crowd. “Where are you going, Kate?”

“The car.” She clutched the jar tightly. “To put the flowers away.”

“Yeah, forget about the f**king flowers for a minute,” his voice began to pick up with intensity. “And just look at me!!” She just stopped walking, but she couldn’t make herself look at him. He exhaled lowly. “f**k this.” She looked up to see him looking around the area. He exhaled. “Right. Come here for a minute.”

She shook her head as he tugged her through the crowd and into a grove of trees. Kate let out a cry as he pressed her back against an apple tree. “Don’t!” She held up a hand, placing it on his chest. “Don’t!”

“Kate it's alright.” He said as he stood in front of her. “I just want to talk.”

She exhaled sharply and said. “I don’t want to.”

“I know. But you cannot go on avoiding me.” She could. She didn’t have to talk to him, and he couldn’t make her. She closed her eyes and gripped the small jar of flowers tightly in her hand. Thomas exhaled deeply as he said. “I moved too f**king fast, didn’t I?” She didn’t answer him. He ran his knuckles gently down her cheek as he said. “You probably never had a man kiss you once, and I just f**king grabbed you.”

“You did,” she croaked. “You did.”

He was silent a moment, calmly stroking her cheek before asking. “Had anyone?”

She felt so stupid and pathetic as she shook her head. “No.”

“Why not?”

She hated this about him. His voice, the accent – he was so encouraging, and he made her want to talk to him without even trying. “It’s complicated.”

“No,” he said softly. “You’ve got to be at least two years younger than me. You’re a very pretty girl; boys should have been after you, especially when you turned sixteen.”

Her heart pounded in her stomach as she said. “My…virtue is protected and examined…four times a year to ensure that.” Heat filled her cheeks. “No one has compromised me.”

“And,” his nose brushed against her forehead, causing her to flinch. “What would happen…if a man were to compromise you?”

She bit her lip and stated honestly. “He’d be killed.” He didn’t even react to that. She inhaled as she said. “I am not joking, Thomas… He would be executed and his body taken somewhere where no one would ever find it.” He pressed a kiss to her nose, and she shook her head. “Mr. Shelby---

“I thought,” he said lowly. “that we’d discussed you not calling me that anymore.”

“W-we have to talk.” She was going to be sick.

“In a minute.” He said as he tilted her chin up. “When you look at me.”

She didn’t want to look at him. Looking at him would be a terrible mistake. She could feel it in her bones. Still, ignoring him was like ignoring an instinct. She opened her eyes and found his face inches away from hers. She jumped back and smacked her head on the tree. “Ouch.”

He shook his head. “Kate, stop moving for one minute.”

“No. We can’t.” He ignored her and pressed a kiss to her neck. Kate’s legs instantly buckled, and he grabbed her around the waist. “Wait.”

“Why?” He murmured into her neck. “You’re so f**king sweet.”

Her brains had to be melting or something. She couldn’t think. Her heart was beating so fast that it was vibrating in her ears. Thomas undid one button so he could gain access to her throat. “God!” She gasped as she grabbed hold of his forearms. She wasn’t thinking anymore. Her head was spinning.

“f**k!” Thomas ran his hand through her hair and gently grabbed hold of her head.

The world was on fire, burning out of control and killing her in the most exquisite way possible. She gasped for air as Thomas’s mouth went from her throat to her chin to her cheek, and then he claimed her mouth again. Unlike before, the passion was much more tempered, but it was there. She was moaning against his mouth as he grabbed hold of her hip in his hand. She let out a cry against his mouth, and his hand went straight around her waist. She grabbed hold of him, not having a choice. Her willpower had been stripped from her, and he was completely in control over her. His hand crept from her waist to her breast, and she let out a shout into his mouth. He arched his hips into hers, and feeling his arousal…that was enough to push her over the edge.

She broke the kiss and shook her head. “Stop.”

Thomas exhaled deeply. “Sorry, I’m moving too fast again.”

“This has to stop!” She declared as she blinked back the tears.

He frowned. “What does?”

“All of it!” She pushed him away and stepped away from the tree. “After this, you will stop touching me.”

“Hold on. Kate---

“I mean it!!” She spun around and shouted at him. “You will stop touching me! You will stop talking to me! You will stop grabbing me! You will stop making people think that I’m yours because I’m not! You will stop kissing me! You will stop trying to f**k me, and you will go f**k whoever it was you were f**king because I will not let you!” The man had the audacity to continue looking confused. “You will let me do my job, and you will stop inviting me to family outings! There will not be anything between us, Thomas Shelby! Ever!”

“What the---

“Because I will not let anything happen!” She said. “I don’t know what you have planned, but once I have the money, I’ll be leaving here, intact. You and I will go on with our lives as if we never met. Do you understand me!?”

He stared at her for a long time, and then…he just turned on his heel, walked out of the forest and headed back to the fair!! She couldn’t think! She couldn’t understand what was going on in that head of his! Why had Thomas Shelby, the man who was so used to ordering people, just walked away after she told him that she wanted nothing to do with him? She covered her mouth and moved to go cry behind the tree in silence. The worst part was, if he’d waited just a moment and talked to her, he’d have seen that she was lying. But she cared too much about him – too much to let him fall for her and start imagining a future that could never come to pass. It was all that she could do to keep from imagining a life for herself as Mrs Thomas Shelby. But her subconscious betrayed her when she fell asleep in the car. For her dreams were of him. Of his potent kisses, his strong arms and the beautiful child that he’d put into her womb.

Chapter 11: Independence

Today hadn’t gone as he’d planned at all. Well, that was a lie. The war with the Lees had gone EXACTLY as he’d planned. The rest of the day hadn’t gone as planned.

The way he’d touched and kissed Kate had been unplanned. He’d told himself that he was going to apologise, but he went and f**ked that up. He’d lost his head and had, once again, lost control over himself. He was normally in control when it came to emotions. But then he looked at her, and then everything he was feeling just came blowing out of him like a bomb. He’d kissed her, and this time, innocent or not, she’d responded somewhat awkwardly to him. She’d grabbed his forearms first before stroking his face and falling into his kisses. Oh, she was a great kisser, despite having no experience. Her kisses warmed him and made his heart race in a way that no other woman’s could.

But then his impatience caused her to get scared. He knew that she hadn’t meant a single word that she’d said. She was scared, and whatever was chasing her in her past was still having an effect on her. She wanted him. He could see it in her eyes, hear it in her voice and taste it in her f**king kiss. He’d walked away because he knew that no matter what he said to her, she wouldn’t hear it. She had a right to be scared because the tension between them was frightening. It was strong and completely overpowered his senses to the point that he could barely think when he was around her. The minutes that they did spend in each other’s company were never enough for him. He always wanted to spend more time with her. She occupied his thoughts to the point that he needed to walk by the Garrison twice a day and pop in for a drink once a day just to see her. At first, he cared about people knowing, but as time went by, he decided that he didn’t. His heart knew that he needed to see her, so he accommodated her.

Today, they’d come back to Small Heath being torn apart in their absence. They’d slowed down to see the damage. Kate had used that opportunity to hop out of the car to help a woman and child with a couch. He let her go. Making a note to catch up with her later. This situation had to be dealt with swiftly, and Polly was waiting for them with a bucket of beer.”

“The coppers told everyone Arthur had agreed to it when he was arrested.” So, the inspector was going to play the game that way. “They said the Peaky Blinders had cleared out to the fair to let them do it.”

“No one ever said anything to that copper about smashing up bloody houses!” Arthur stated furiously.

“All right.” He was tired. He wanted to get to Kate. “Which pubs did they do?”

“The Guns, The Chain, The Marquis. All the ones that pay you to protect them.” He nodded. “The only one they didn't touch was The Garrison.” Of course. “Made sure people think we were in on it. Smart, this copper. So go on.” She ordered firmly. “Drink your beers. Get out. You better show people you're still the cock of the walk.”

“Hand out some cash to the landlords of the pubs.” He added. “Pay some veterans to fix the places up.”

“So what about you, Tommy?” Arthur enquired.

“I've to go to Charlie's to stable the horse. Looked foot sore in the box.” That was partly true, but he needed to see Kate before he set off in the evening. After the horse, he’d go find her because he couldn’t leave it like that.

“Let them see your faces.” Polly stated before drawing the doors closed. “So we both know what they were looking for.” He didn’t answer her as she sat down. “You don't read the papers?”

“Racing papers.” He said simply.

“So let me tell you the odds.” She held his gaze as she said. “I reckon it's 3-to-1 there'll be a revolution.”

“I wouldn't bet on that.”

“That copper's betting on it.” She stated. “He's not going to let it rest till he gets those guns back.”

He figured. He exhaled and sat down, blowing on his cigarette. “Did he talk to you, Pol?”

“In the church.”

“Did he try to find our Ada?” He enquired.

“She was sleeping.”

He let out a laugh at Polly’s simple answer. “Where was she sleeping, Pol?”

“I thought you didn't care for women's business.” He didn’t. But he knew that Ada had someone in her life, but he didn’t know who. “Besides, you’ve got a woman around the house that you’ve not bothered to tell anyone about.” He didn’t answer her. “Ada said there were men chasing her, and she jumped in the back of your car.”

He nodded. “Yeah.”

“You need to be careful with her, Tommy. If she’s lying---

She doesn’t lie,” he says. “She chooses not to answer certain questions, but she at least tells you that.”

“Same thing,” she exhaled and said. “I’ve seen how you look at her, Thomas.”

“Like how?’

“Kate,” Polly said simply.

“You want her.” So? That wasn’t a crime. “You’ve not said it, but your eyes make it clear that you’d f**k your bastard into her if she’d let you.”

He exhaled as he said, “Anything else, Poll?”

“Yes,” Polly said firmly. “Ada said that she and Kate have talked. That girl has her heart closed off. She said that she’s here to work, and then she’s going to leave Thomas. You won’t see her again.”

“Kate gets a lot of foolish ideas in her head. Leaving is one of them,” he started to leave the room. “She’s not going anywhere.”

“Thomas,” Polly leaned forward. “She doesn’t fit in here. She can’t do the most basic of things. Wash her clothes, put a kettle on or cook an egg.”

“She never had to before, Poll.”

“And what makes you think that a girl who was fortunate enough to not have to work a day in her life would ever settle for a man like you?”

That was a good question. He didn’t like it, but it was a good one. He got up as he said. “Because Poll, she hated that life, and she ran away so she could have some f**king freedom. “You didn’t see her before, but she’s happier here,” he said, shaking his head. “She said once that Small Heath was beautiful. There’s nothing beautiful down here.” Polly nodded in agreement. “So, you have to wonder…what the hell was so f**king bad in her life to make Small Heath look beautiful to her?”

He stood up and started to leave the room. He’d let Polly think on that for a bit. There was nothing malicious about Kate. If she were trying to get close to them, he’d have provided the perfect situation for her to do that. Instead, she drew back from him.

“Thomas,” Polly said firmly. “What about the copper?  He knows you're the boss. He wants to meet you. Will you talk to him?

“No.” He shook his head. “You don't parlay when you're on the back foot. We'll strike a blow back first,” he exhaled as he said. “I have to go, Poll.”

“To see to the horse? Or the girl?”

He simply shook his head and left. He could do both. Polly would talk to Kate eventually, but he knew that Polly wouldn’t find anything on Kate. She had a past; she was open and honest about that. In time, she’d tell him everything, and Polly would see that his instincts were right.

---

That evening,

---

“Tommy wants you.” Finn said from on top of the counter, from where he’d just pulled down the picture of the King. Because he was a child, his voice practically echoed through the Garrison, alerting every man to the fact that Thomas had summoned her.

Kate didn’t look up from where she was drying the glasses. “Don’t care.”

“Kate,” Harry said. “You have to go.”

“No, I don’t,” she said simply. “Tell him I have work to do.”

“Kate,” Harry started to practically beg. “Just go.”

“I said no.” She was putting her foot down. This had to stop. She wasn’t going to be summoned by him.

“But we’re having a fire!” Finn said with the full innocence of a child. “Everyone’s coming.”

“I’m not.” She said softly. "Please tell him I have work and cannot attend Finn. I'm sorry."

‘Yes, you are,” Harry said as he set down the cloth. “We all are. So, come on.”

She shook her head. “I’ll keep working---

“Look!” Harry said firmly. “You don’t tell Thomas Shelby no.”

“Someone should.” She stated as she looked up at him. "He only runs the world down here because all of you let him!"

“Because we're smart enough to know the consequences of what happens if you tell him no. If you don't want to go, then you tell him in person,” Harry said. “Don’t you send messages back and put my establishment in danger! He could come back and decide to trash the place because you wouldn't leave.”

He had a point there. She exhaled and set the cloth down. “Fine. I will go and tell him myself!”

Harry made a face. “I’d rather you didn’t.”

“Can’t have it both ways, Harry.” She said as she went around the bar, not even bothering to remove her apron. She grabbed her coat and said calmly, even though every man in the Garrison was panicking. “I’ll be back shortly.”

“Alright. But Kate,” Harry exhaled. “Remember what I told you.”

“I do.” She said calmly. “I will scratch his eye out if he tries.” Finn let out a laugh, and she turned towards him. “Where are we going?”

“Watery Lane!” He said cheerfully. “We’re burning pictures of the King!”

Her heart dropped to her stomach at those words. “Why?”

“Don’t know.”

She followed after Finn. “Is it political? Does he have something against the aristocracy?”

“I don’t think so,” Finn chattered. “Tommy said it has to do with this new inspector from Belfast. He trashed the place while we were gone and blamed it on everyone.”

She nodded. “And…for that, he burns pictures of the king?”

“You’ll have to ask him. Tommy didn’t tell us anything.”

That…was comforting, she supposed. She hadn’t stopped to think about Thomas’s political affiliations. She knew he was of Irish descent; did that mean that he supported the IRA? He had fought for the king, but he then also threw his medals in the river. An act of rebellion? Expressing hate towards the country that wouldn’t give Ireland its freedom for nearly 800 years? That then made her realise that if Thomas was one of those who hated the aristocracy, that put her life in even more danger. True, Andorra was a small kingdom, and most people had never even heard of it. She’d already told Thomas where she’d been born. All he had to do was decide that he was curious enough to try and find her. That would reveal EVERYTHING about her, and she’d be a political prisoner. Thomas certainly was ambitious enough to consider a thing like that.

They walked down Watery Lane, and sure enough, there was a bonfire in the middle of the street. Finn pushed his way through the crowd, and she kept her gaze forward. They reached the fire, and Finn yanked on Tommy’s arm. “Kate’s here!”

Tommy turned towards her…and her heart stopped. Not because of him, but because of the man standing next to him. It was the reporter from the Birmingham Dispatch who’d recognised her when she was leaving the pub in London!

Chapter 12: Matters of the heart

The way the blood drained out of Kate’s face told him that something was wrong. He didn’t know what it was at first. She looked around, clearly planning to run away again. He moved quickly, though. He moved two people aside and grabbed her wrist as she turned to run.

“Let me go!” She begged instantly. “Let me go!”

“What is it?”

She inhaled as she hissed. “He was one of the men who was chasing me.”

He hadn’t realised. “It’s ok. Come here. Stand with me.” She shook her head. “If you run, you’ll draw more attention to yourself. Stand by me; put your hair on your shoulder. It’ll block your face.”

She shook her head. “Thomas.”

“Kate,” he said firmly. “I need you to trust me. You can trust me. It’s alright.” He took her hand and gently tugged her back to the fire. Kate instantly started pulling her hair over her shoulder. He moved a few steps ahead, blocking her from the reporter’s line of vision. He cleared his throat. “As I was saying, there are some things I want you to write down. Now, first of all. It's not the people around here that are disloyal to the King. It's the opposite. You see, we don't want our beloved king looking down and seeing the things that have been done to us. So we are taking down his pictures.”

“But why are you burning them?” The reporter asked. The question seemed to be one that Kate needed to know, for she tensed up.

“We went through hell for our king. Walked through the flames of war. Write all this down!” He ordered firmly. “And now we're being attacked in our own homes. These new coppers over from Belfast are breaking into our homes and interfering with our women. We don't think our king would want to see that happening. So we are lighting fires to raise the alarm.”

“May I ask you,” the reporter enquired. “In what capacity do you speak?”

“No capacity. I’m an ordinary man.” He felt her exhale and relax at those words. “I won gallantry medals at the Somme. I want you to write in your paper what's going on here.” The reporter nodded and glanced at him. Or rather, past him, like he was looking at Kate. “You find my wife interesting?”

The reporter instantly jerked his eyes away from her. “No! No, Mr Shelby!”

“Good.” He stared the man down before ordering him to leave. “Go on, go.” The reporter did, and Kate exhaled in relief. “Don’t turn around.” He said. “He’ll be escorted back to his place.”

She nodded and asked. “Why’d you do that?”

He glanced at her before asking. “Do I need a reason to protect you?”

She inhaled as she said. “You can’t say things like that.”

“Like what?”

She locked her gaze on the fire as she said. “Your wife.”

He knew what she was getting at. “Is that so?”

She nodded. “Yes.”

He waited a moment before saying. “Let you and me take a walk.”

“I’d prefer not to, for the moment.” She said firmly.

He exhaled before saying. “I’ll keep my hands off you.”

She shot him a direct look. “For how long?”

She knew, of course she did. “For as long as I can.”

“For all of tonight?”

He nodded. “I’ll do my best.”

She was silent for a minute, thinking before speaking. “I need to go back to the Garrison.”

“You don’t have to.”

“I have work to finish.” She said firmly. “I’m not staying here, remember?”

He nodded. “You’re working a train ticket to London. I know that.” She nodded, keeping her eyes locked on the road ahead. Once they were out of the crowd, he reached into his pocket and pulled out five pounds. “Here’s the money.” She stared at it as if he were holding out a monster that would snap her face off. “You can take it and go.”

This was a dangerous game he was playing. He knew that she’d turn it down, but he needed to say this. She inhaled, her hand on her stomach, which was probably churning as fast as his heart was racing. “I didn’t earn that,” she said quietly. “So I can’t accept that.”

“It’s not that much, Kate.”

“To you,” she said tightly. “But I’ve taken enough from you. In truth, I probably owe you that much in room and board.”

“It’s an empty room. Hasn’t been used in years.”

“That’s not the point.” She said firmly. “You and everyone else around here work for your money. It’d be wrong of me to take the money from you.”

“That or you don’t want to go, Kate.”

She shook her head and continued walking. “We all do things we don’t want to do because we have duties that we cannot walk away from, even if we don’t want to.”

He put his wallet away. “So, you do feel something.”

“I never said I did,” she said too quickly, and she was squeezing her fingers again. He reached over and grabbed her hand. She instantly turned towards him. “You said you’d keep your hands off.”

“Didn’t say I’d let you break your f**king hand.” When she pulled her hand away from him, he asked her. “Why do you do that? Grab your hands like that?”

She was silent a moment and then said. “The doctor said…it slows the heart down.”

She was turning off her emotions. Literally. “You can do that all you want, Kate. It’s not going to turn off what you feel about me.”

She gripped those fingers of hers tighter. “I don’t feel anything---

“Say it without trying to break those fingers of yours.” He said. “Tell me that by looking straight at me without f**king hiding from me.”

She shook her head. “Thomas, please.”

“Please what?” He asked. “You keep f**king looking at me.”

She shook her head. “I don’t.”

“You do.” He said honestly. “Every morning, I enter the kitchen, and you look at me. John, Arthur and the others walk in, and you don’t look up. You don’t look at them. You don’t get flustered, upset or embarrassed with anyone else. Just me. You don’t talk to anyone else. Harry says you’re very professional at the Garrison. You barely say a word to him or anyone else. But you talk to me.”

“That doesn’t mean anything.” She half-whispered.

“When you talk to me more than you do to Ada, yes, it does mean something,” he said firmly. “And you know…that I’ve been f**king looking at you.”

She bit her lip and whispered. “Possibly.”

He gripped her elbow and turned her towards him. “Then why are you ignoring this, Kate? Why are you ignoring us? And don’t tell me you’re not interested in me because I know you are!”

Her head shot up, and she snapped at him. “How dare you!”

“You kissed me, Kate.”

“No,” she shook her head. “YOU kissed me first!”

“Yeah, I did.” He nodded before informing her. “Nowhere did I say that you had to kiss me back. But you did!” She exhaled and rubbed the bridge of her nose, clearly fighting back tears. “The truth is, if you didn’t want me, you’d have hit me for even touching you.”

“I do not---

“Stop f**king lying to me, Kate.” He said as he closed the distance between them and stared through her. “You can lie to yourself, but you cannot f**king lie to me.” For a moment, there was nothing but silence. The sounds of the people enjoying themselves around the bonfire had faded, and it was just them right now. She was so scared, and he hated seeing her scared. He didn’t. He wanted her to know that she was safe with him. He inhaled as he asked her. “Who was the last person to tell you that they loved you?”

That instantly brought tears to her eyes. She inhaled as she confessed. “Nobody.”

He frowned at that. “What do you mean? You have parents.”

She inhaled as she said. “I was…created to continue their legacy. That is all,” he could see her heart breaking as she said. “I’m more of a chess piece…than a person.”

“So why do you want to go back?”

“Why did you go to war?” She asked him. He exhaled, hating it when she asked him questions like that. “You did your duty, and I have to do mine. This…it’s a reprieve from all my obligations, which I will have to return to.” She exhaled before saying. “You…will not be a part of the life that I have to return to. So,” she dropped her gaze. “I will not let anything happen between us.”

“Too late.” He gripped her chin and made her look up at him. “You’re not going anywhere.”

She froze, and the blood drained out of her face. “W-what?”

“You really think…that I’ll let you go back to people who hurt you? People who starved and abused you.”

She exhaled. “Thomas, it’s not a matter of me wanting to go back; I have to go back!”

“No, you don’t.”

She groaned. “Why are you so stubborn?”

“Only way to survive around here.” He said. “One of the things is, you don’t give up on things that are good for you. And you…are something different.” She took a step back, and he moved with her. “If you didn’t want me, Kate, I’d have no problem staying away from you. But you do.”

She shook her head. “I never said that, Thomas Shelby.”

“Tell me that you don’t.”

She paused, and he felt the shiver run through her entire body. “I don’t have to tell you anything.”

“Because you’re afraid,” he said simply. “You’re afraid of me, but you’re afraid of yourself.”

“Stop it.”

“That’s alright.” He said. “You’re going to have a lot of time to get used to the idea of you and me.”

“There is no you and me.”

“Then tell me you’re not interested in me.”

She exhaled. “Haven’t I said as much?”

“You danced around it.” He said. “Almost like a politician.” She jolted violently, almost as if she’d been stabbed. He lowered his hand as he asked. “Is that it? Your father some rich politician?”

“It doesn’t,” she exhaled and ran her hand through her hair. “It doesn’t matter! I have told you that it is complicated, and even though you offered me money, just once in my life, I’d like to earn something and not have it handed to me! So,” she exhaled as she started walking away again. “As long as you understand that I will not allow anything to begin between us, we’re good. Do you understand that, Mr Shelby?”

He did. “You’re a stubborn one, Kate. Well, I’m stubborn too. Harry was going to tell you this tomorrow, but I’ll tell you now.” She frowned as she turned towards him. ”He’s cutting your hours.” Her jaw dropped in shock. “You only work on Monday through Thursday.”

“But,” she stammered. “That’s only---

“Four days a week. “Yes,” he stated. “I know.”

“Why?” She demanded. “Why are you doing this?”

“I have several reasons, Kate. Friday and the weekends are the most insane. I won’t have you in the pub on those nights, especially with things about to start happening.”

“Thomas---

“Since your hours are cut, it’ll take you longer to get that ticket.”

She stared at him. “Are you serious, Thomas?”

“Yes. No one else will hire you, so you have to work with Harry. By the time you’ve saved the money…you’ll have changed your mind about leaving here.”

“You,” she shook her head. “You are something else, Thomas Shelby! I can’t. I’ve never met a man more exasperating, conceited or arrogant than you! You just, you just strut around her like you f**king own the whole town and everyone in it!” She stepped towards him. “Well, let me tell you something! You do not own me, and you never will!”

He grabbed her and pulled her up against his chest. She gasped as he lowered his face to hers. He didn’t kiss her this time, but God, was it f**king hard not to. The world slowed again, and she let out an audible swallow. Her eyes darted all over his face, her gaze dropping to his lips more than once. Yes, there was attraction between them, and it was running deep as a river for them both.

“Do you feel that, Kate?” He asked lowly, and she gave the faintest of nods, probably without realising it. “I didn’t decide that. It’s something that you and I silently decided. I’m not in control over it anymore than you are. You’re just fighting it harder than I am. So I…am tilting the odds in my favour until you stop fighting me and come to me.”

"I'm not," she whispered softly. "going to fall in love with you, Thomas Shelby."

"You're right." He agreed. "You can't fall in love with me now, because you're already in love with me Kate."

She was silent for a long time, and then she said. “I’m going to talk to Polly.”

“Go ahead.” He said without breaking eye contact with her. “She’s good for talking about matters of the heart. But she won’t be able to tell you how to turn it off, Kate. Those feelings, they’re not going anywhere.”

She inhaled before saying. “Whatever my feelings are…I will take them with me when I leave. Your aunt is going to keep you in check until I can do so.”

“She can try.” He said. “But she’ll tell you what I told you, Kate. You can’t run away from the heart.” She let out a huff, and he held his hand out to her. “Come on. I’ll walk you back.”

She walked past him and ignored his hand. He shook his head and fell in step beside her. She ignored him brushing her hand with his. But as before, she caught hold of his hand and held onto him. She needed him just as much as he needed her. There was no denying that.

Chapter 13: Women's business

Friday morning,

---

“Mrs Gray?” Kate asked as she walked into the betting house. All eyes, including those of Polly Gray, turned towards her. She cleared her throat. “I do not mean to intrude, but if you have fifteen minutes to spare, I would appreciate a word with you.”

Polly’s brow arched as she put out her cigarette. “Well. For you, I can put aside an hour or two.”

“Poll,” Thomas warned.

“Women’s business, Tom.” Polly stood up and moved towards Kate. “We’ll talk in the kitchen.”

“Thank you, Mrs Gray.”

“Polite little thing, aren’t you?” Polly’s expression wasn’t very telling. She nodded towards the kitchen. “We’ll talk in there.”

“Yes, Ma’am.” Her heart began to pound in her chest as they moved towards the kitchen. She hated doing this. It made her feel like a tattletale, but Polly was the matriarch of the family. That meant she kept Thomas in check, and if she was going to make it out of Small Heath without a broken heart, she had to talk to Polly. They entered the kitchen, and Polly gestured for her to sit down. Kate did as she was bid and waited. Polly shut the door and moved to stand by her. She saw where Thomas had inherited the intimidation tactic from. “Now,” she said calmly. “You said you wanted to talk to me. What about?”

She inhaled as she said. “About Mr Shelby.”

“Which one?” Polly asked. “Though I can guess you mean Thomas.”

“Unfortunately, yes.” She exhaled as she began to explain. “I do not mean to cause trouble. The Shelby family has been exceedingly generous and protective. But,” she inhaled as she said. “I should like to leave here and move into a boarding house.”

Polly nodded. “I have to agree with you as well.”

“However,” she said calmly. “I find that…due to word of mouth, I am unable to do so.”

Polly frowned. “What does that mean?”

“It means that,” she exhaled. “Thomas had several blinders put out the word to a variety of establishments that they are not to let me rent from them.”

Polly’s eyes widened. “He what?”

She exhaled as he said. “I fear that,” her cheeks warmed as she said. “He is…forming an attachment.”

“You mean, falling in love with you?” Polly asked as she sat down and crossed her arms. “Is that what you mean?”

“Yes.” Her heart beat faster as she admitted. “That is why I can’t…I can’t stay here.”

“Why?” She enquired. “Because Birmingham isn’t like London? It’s dirty, filled with low people?”

“No!” She shook her head. “No, it’s just….God!” She exhaled in frustration. “I wish that I could explain it to you all. But I can’t! I just…have responsibilities that I cannot get away from.”

“Try explaining it to me,” Polly asked. “Thomas said you don’t lie.”

“I don’t like to lie.” She admitted. “But…I do wish to tell you some things.”

“Why?”

“Because,” she exhaled. “I believe it to be safer for you and your family if as little is known about me as possible.”

Polly frowned. “Alright, now you have me curious. Why?”

She inhaled. “As I’m sure that Ada or Thomas informed you, I am running from someone. My family.”

“Yes. They didn’t say why.”

“Because I didn’t tell them why.” She held Polly’s gaze. “Originally, all I wished to do was get away for one evening by myself. I needed a moment’s peace before I threw myself out of a window. When I say it was difficult, I had to trick our new maid into drinking my opium-tainted whisky.” Polly’s brows rose. “Once she was incapacitated, I took her uniform, coat and wallet. I followed the servants out of the entrance and followed them to the city.”

Polly stared at her before asking. “Were you locked up in prison?”

“No, not exactly, but…a cage is a cage, no matter how golden it is.” She exhaled as she said. “All I wanted was to have a few hours alone without being told what to think, do or feel.” Polly nodded in understanding. “Originally, I wanted to have fish and chips from an actual pub in Britain.”

“You’re not from Britain?”

She shook her head. “No. Forgive me if I don’t say where exactly.”

Polly chuckled. “You’re a strange little thing. You don’t lie, so you tell the truth and state that you won’t tell the truth. That’s new for me.” Polly sobered instantly and then asked. “Thomas said he offered you money to go, but you wouldn’t take it. Why?”

Because she didn’t want to go. “That’s a tricky question to answer. You know…how you have to walk a mile in someone’s shoes to understand them better?” Polly nodded. “Well, that’s what I’m doing, and I do believe that it’ll be for the better for many if I do so.”

“Why?”

“I can’t answer that.” Polly laughed. “Sorry.”

“Of course you are. You…are this funny woman. God knows why Tommy f**king likes you.” Polly studied her and then asked. “Do you like him?”

Kate pressed her fingers together, trying to stop the warmth from flowing up to her cheeks. “Yes, I like him. But I have already told him that I will not allow these feelings to go beyond that of friendship.”

“Ha!” Polly let out a laugh. “Oh! No wonder you’re coming to me. Listen…when Tommy makes up his mind. That’s it! No one, be it the devil or God, can talk him out of anything! If he’s decided that he wants you…he’s going to have you.”

“So, I have been informed by many other people.” She said 'honestly', as she stated. “I’m going to relay to you what I told him yesterday when he informed me that he was going to come after me.” God, she didn’t need to think about that. She exhaled as she said. “I told him that any feelings forming on our accounts would be impossible.”

Polly’s eyes narrowed as she said. “Why?”

She had to be blunt. “Because if I were to fall in love with a man like Thomas Shelby, he would be taken away and executed.”

Polly went still. “What the hell? What have you got us into?”

“Nothing, I assure you.” She said as calmly as she could. “I am not wanted, nor am I a danger. My parents are both people of very strong influence, and they have very strong demands of me. Anyone interfering in those demands will…shall we say, be dealt with?”

“But as long as no one crosses the line,” Polly enquired. “All will be well?”

“Yes.” She said. “That’s another reason why I wish to leave here, but I need a proper boarding house. If it’s revealed that I stayed here with Thomas---

“Say no more,” Polly said. “I’ll talk to my neighbour, Mrs Harris. She should be able to let you move in Monday. She’ll ask for 25 shillings a month.”

Kate nodded; that was a little more than what she made. There was enough for her to put aside. She got paid 20 shillings a week. She had 50 shillings now. That left enough for her to put some aside for food and the rest towards her ticket. She needs 1 pound and 20 shillings. She’d be gone in a matter of weeks. “Thank you. I can afford that.”

“Alright.” Polly looked at her and said. “You…are some big mystery. Thomas always liked mysteries as a child.”

She exhaled and rubbed her neck. “I can imagine,” after a moment she said. “I promise that the day I plan to get on that train and return to London, I will call all of you together and tell you everything right before I leave.”

Polly nodded as she said. “I guess that’s all I can take from you. Normally, I can tell about a person, but you…you’re different.” She exhaled as she said. “Thomas has a pretty good sense of things when it comes to people. But he, like all men, tends to go off the rails when he starts thinking with his heart and cock.”

Kate flushed red at those words. “Which is why I want to put some distance between us. He… will not listen to me.”

“Like I said, his heart and cock are involved.” She leaned forward as she asked. “Can’t tell about your heart or other parts of you.”

She was silent before stating. “There are no parts of me to involve with him.” Her ears flamed. “I know what he’s thinking and what he wants.”

“That’s a first,” Polly said. “Tommy doesn’t reveal anything to anyone.”

“He’s…been pretty transparent about things.” She inhaled as she said quietly. “I don’t know what he was like before the war, but…I can imagine that he smiled a lot. Laughed too.”

“Christ,” Polly said with a smile. “Can you f**king see him. He wanted to work with horses.”

She smiled against her will. “I can see that. He loves horses. Still does.”

“Yes.” Polly studied her closely as she said. “If you can see that, you’ve already let him get too f**king close.”

“I’m trying not to.”

“And I’m telling you, it’s too late.” Polly held her gaze. “But I will back you up on this if you think it’ll work. You’ll work on the days that Tommy and Harry are allowing. Harry’s already interviewed another girl to take your place on the weekends. Use that time to get a bit more familiar with the area. After all,” she reminded her. “You can’t walk in the shoes of everyone else if you’ve only walked in the shoes of drunks.”

She nodded. “That’s good advice.”

“Tommy won’t be able to follow you around every hour of the day. Some space might just do the trick.”

She nodded. “I agree. It’s only been two weeks; he can’t,” she couldn’t say it. “He’ll forget about me.”

“No,” Polly said. “When Tommy loves, he holds on. He won’t forget you.” She didn’t want to hear that. “It’s better this way, that it ends badly between the two of you. See if you can get another man to fancy you while you’re here.”

Kate shook her head. “He’d kill them.”

“Probably. But I don’t think so. Thomas has this thing called pride. He'd look weak for killing someone else because you didn't fancy him.”

“I don’t want to hurt him,” Kate said softly. “I want this to end peacefully.”

“I can see that, but Thomas isn’t an ordinary man. You know that.” after a moment Polly said. “Tell me this. If you didn’t have your obligations and all that, and a man like Tommy asked you for your hand in marriage.” She nearly fainted. “What would you say to him?”

She shook her head. “I can’t---

“Yes, you can.” Polly said. “It’s just us women here, and this is something I want to know. You’ve been honest about as much of your past as you could, but I need to know what’s going on in your heart right now. Because I do believe you when you say that you have to go, but I don’t believe you for one minute that you actually want to go.”

God, was she truly that transparent? She told herself that whatever she was feeling towards Tommy was temporary. She wouldn’t feel a thing about them when she left. But she knew that she was wrong. She was falling for him, and she was scared that she wouldn’t be able to stop falling in love with him. There was just something about him and those damn blue eyes of his that pulled at her soul. She felt safe with him. She’d never felt so safe in her life before! Thomas, the way he looked at her sometimes…he looked at her like he wanted to hold onto her forever and never let her go. She’d been alone for so long, starved of human contact. When she looked in his eyes and saw the emptiness that matched hers, she felt seen. She felt noticed, and she felt understood. She felt as if she were looking into a mirror. Instead of her face reflecting back at her, it was his because they were already a part of each other.

She exhaled shakily as she told Polly honestly. “If I were free to chart my own course. Free to love and marry whoever I chose…I would be deeply honoured to be married to a man like him.”

“Why?” Polly asked. “It’s obvious you come from a rich place. Why would you ever want to be with a man like Thomas? ”

“Because I feel safe with him.” She admitted honestly. “He protects me and treats me with respect, even when he clearly wants to do ungentlemanly things towards me.”

“Oh, Christ,” Polly said. “I’ll talk to him about that.”

“Thank you.” after a moment, she said. “I feel seen with him. I feel…understood and appreciated. I know that it won’t last, but…I cannot let it get deeper between us.”

“Well, I got news for you, Kate. You’re already in love with him.” Polly crossed her arms as she said. “My advice to you is to earn that ticket back as quickly as you can. You can fight it, but I’ll tell you this…he’s not going to stop unless you agree to marry him.”

“I can’t.” She inhaled as the tears trickled down her cheeks. “Because of my position in life, I am not allowed to marry at my own leisure.”

Polly looked at her and stated. “In that case, I suggest that you take what you can get.”

She shook her head. “I can’t. I don’t want to hurt him.”

“You’re going to hurt him anyway. Just make sure he knows that it isn’t anything more than that to you.” Polly said. “Because if you’re going to leave us and go back to Hell…then you damn well make sure you have a memory of someone to get you through that. Do you understand me?”

Kate nodded. “Yes.”

Polly stood up, and she exhaled. “Right. I’ll have a word with Thomas. You go on, have a walk, and buy yourself some lunch or something. Ok?”

She nodded. “Thank you.”

Kate got up and walked calmly out of the house. She could hear Polly call after Thomas and knew that she’d stopped him from following her. She went for a walk down by the canals to think. Polly was right; some time away from Thomas was good. It gave her some time to think and breathe. However, he still consumed her thoughts, and she needed him out of them.

There was a chill in the air, along with a scent of rain. She went down to the market and was able to buy some fresh peas, ham, carrots, an onion and a fresh loaf of rosemary bread. The bread was from this little Italian store, and the owner was very gracious towards her. She returned back home and began starting on the fresh pea soup. Polly came in and gave her a subtle nod before sitting down to help her shell the peas. They talked, and Polly did fish a little bit more for information about her. If anything wasn’t harmful, Kate gave it to her. She liked Polly; she was a very strong woman. Kate did ask Polly a little bit about her life history, and Polly gave it to her while they worked on dinner.

Finn was the only one who bothered to show up. Polly said that Thomas had an appointment with a police inspector. In a way she was glad, because that gave her the chance to go upstairs and get in bed without any drama. Thomas got back around 10:00, and he went straight to bed. She could smell opium and knew that he had trouble sleeping. The smell of opium made her nauseous, so it took time for her to be able to drift off.

Tonight it was different. The pouring rain was unable to hide the sound of Thomas waking loudly from his bed. She knew he was having a nightmare, and the storm made it worse. She lay there, hating that he was suffering alone, but she knew that she couldn’t go to him.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

She jumped upright at the sound of someone banging on the door! She’d been found! That was her first thought as she got out of bed, put the robe on and stepped out of the bedroom door to listen. Thomas came out of his room, pulling his coat on.

She turned towards him. “What is it?”

He didn’t even look at her as he said. “Something’s wrong with the horse.”

She didn’t like that. It made her anxious. She went to go in her room and told her that it wasn’t any of her business. But in the end, her heart won out. She came out of the room as Thomas slammed the downstairs door. She paused long enough to pull her shoes on, and then, like the weak fool she was, she went running after Thomas Shelby in the pouring rain.

Chapter 14: A bad night

Today was the day that everything had gone to f**king hell, and the hits just hadn’t stopped coming. It had started with Kate talking to Polly. He didn’t know what was said, but whatever Kate had told Polly was enough to get her on her side. Polly told him that he was to stay away from Kate and leave her be. He wouldn’t do that. Kate could think that she’d won for the moment, but she hadn’t.

He’d tried looking for her, but he couldn’t find her. So, he got on his horse and went for a ride, keeping an eye out for her. He didn’t see her, though. The horse was still sore, so he’d gotten off him and walked him for a bit. He’d wound up outside the Garrison, where the new barmaid, Grace, was. Harry said Grace actually had references, and she could handle the job. Kate was alright, but she really wasn’t meant to work in a bar. Grace was nice, pretty and blonde. However, his first impression of her was more that of annoyance when she threw the contents of a bucket into the street across his shoes. The conversation had been brief, with her attempting to negotiate for there to be singing in the Garrison. He’d turned her down and got up on his horse.

After riding on and off for an hour, he returned the horse to Charlie’s yard. He’d gone back home to get ready to go deal with the Inspector. Then Polly had dropped a bomb on him. Ada was pregnant. After tracking her down, he demanded to know the name of the man who’d dared to get his younger and only sister pregnant! It had been Freddie. Freddie f**king Thorne! the ONE man in the world that he couldn’t kill because Freddie had saved his life. That led to him and Polly having another row about love. He burnt Ada’s letter to Freddie. Cruel, but Freddie wasn’t right for Ada. He’d drag her from mudhole to mudhole, not even bothering to work to support their child. Polly had been angry at him, but she’d walked off, not bothering to hit him with the fire poker because she knew that he was right.

After that, he had his meeting with Inspector Campbell. The man would have been an interesting foe to battle. But Thomas had fought the Germans. Campbell was a yellow-belly coward who didn’t even bother fighting for his country. He’d tried playing the idiot, but he had Campbell over a barrel, and as predicted, Campbell bowed to his terms. He’d taken the long way home so he could think. But he couldn’t think; his head was aching and spinning. When he came back to the house, Polly was leaving. Kate had already gone up to bed, so he wouldn’t be seeing her. Polly said that Kate had made dinner, so he should eat. But he wasn’t hungry. So, he went up to bed and smoked a pipe. He couldn’t sleep in his shorts like he could before the war. He slept in his trousers, suspenders and even his shoes on his feet in case of an emergency.

Tonight had been that emergency.

He’d woken up from a feverish nightmare, shaking and sweating. He’d tried getting control over himself, but then he’d heard Curly summoning him. There was something wrong with the horse. That was all he knew. He ran with Curly through the street, oblivious to the downpour. He hadn’t even had that beautiful horse for a week. They entered the stables, and he stopped short when he saw one of the front legs tied up. The horse was looking at him with wide eyes, telling him that he was in pain. He removed his hat and quickly bent to look at the horse. The hoof was swollen and stinking. Uncle Charlie was there with a grim look on his face. This wasn’t going to end well for him or the horse.

He turned to Curly, who was planting a kiss on the nose of the horse. “Curly, tell me.”

“C-cursed, Tom.”

Cursed? Had he heard that right? He turned and approached Curly gently so as not to spook him. “Curly, Curly...shhh, Curly.” He placed his hands on Curly’s face, trying to calm him down. “Curly. Tell me. Tell me, Curly. What's wrong with the horse?”

“You bought it at the fair in bad feeling.” Curly explained, struggling to keep his breathing under control. “The Lees put a bad seed in the hoof and got an old woman to put a spell.”

He understood it now. He turned and looked at the horse. The horse was clearly in pain, so he knew what he had to do. It was unfair. He’d started the war, not the horse. It was cruel to do this to an innocent animal. “So those Lee bastards cursed him.”

“Whatever it is,” Uncle Charlie said gently. “He says it spread to the other feet.”

He ran his hands through his hair, holding onto his head as if he could try and hold back the negative thoughts. “It's going to his heart by tomorrow, I say!” Curly said behind him. “I've seen curses like this twice. Can't take them back, Tom. No.”

“I told you, Tommy,” Charlie warned him again. “Better enemies to have than Black Blood gipsies.”

They’d only be enemies temporarily. He had to come to an arrangement with the Lees, but for right now… This was all personal. After a few minutes, he exhaled. Steeling himself for what he had to do. “Get out.”

“Get out, Curly.” Uncle Charlie ordered as he guided Curly out the back door.

He had to kill the horse. He didn’t want to. This…it was going to hurt. Tommy had a fondness for horses. They were the most magnificent creatures on all the earth. They were pure and free-spirited creatures. He didn’t show weakness to anyone, and in this moment…he’d be beyond vulnerable.

“I'm sorry.” He whispered as he pulled his gun and aimed it right at the centre of the horse’s head. The death would be fast. The horse would blink, and it’d be over. He would be the one who wouldn’t be the same ever again. He cocked the gun and felt his lip quiver. He felt his eyes begin to burn with tears, and he forced himself to pull the trigger.

BANG!!

The gunshot echoed in the stables. The red blossomed rapidly in the centre of the horse’s head, and down the horse went! He stepped back as the horse dropped. He hadn’t untied the horse, so the horse was on its back with one foot in the air. He stood there for a moment, the tears trickling down his cheeks as he stared at the horse. Such a beautiful animal, and it had died like this. Such a waste.

Then someone touched him.

He whirled around. “Get the f**k---

It was Kate. She stood there, soaked through to the skin, her hair a wet, tangled mess and tears in her eyes. What…was she doing here? Why had she come after him? This hadn’t concerned her! Not to mention, she’d asked Polly to tell him to leave her alone, so why was she even here? No. He needed to stop overthinking this for the moment. She was here. She’d left the warmth and comfort of her bed and run after him in the rain. Had she seen him shoot the horse? Oh God!

He put his gun away and grabbed her elbow. “You need to go.”

“Thomas.”

“I don’t want you to see---

“I saw.” She said quietly as she grabbed his face. “I saw.”

His heart stopped. “You saw what? How much did you see?”

She inhaled as she croaked. “I saw the whole thing. The Lees put a seed in the hoof, and everything after that.”

So, she had seen him kill the horse. “Kate---

“I’ve killed deer and boars.” Her voice broke as she thumbed away one of his tears. “It was… nothing like that. I’m so sorry.”

He inhaled, and he grabbed onto her and pulled her against him. He buried his face in her neck and breathed her in. She wrapped her arms around his waist, sniffling quietly, as she held onto him in the dark. After a minute of breathing, he pulled away and said. “Let’s get you back before you get sick.”

She nodded. “Alright.”

He wrapped his arm around her, and they walked out of the stables past Curly and Uncle Charlie. They were both stunned to see her there. While he’d never admit it, it felt good to have her there. Despite her misgivings about them being a couple, she still supported him and stood there while he shot the horse. The walk back home was slow, and Kate was trying not to shiver. By the time they reached the Garrison, he decided that they both needed a drink.

She frowned as he banged on the door. “I don’t have the key.”

“It’s fine.”

Right on cue, the door opened, and there stood the new barmaid. “We’re closed, Mr Shelby.”

“Just get me a drink.” He said as he removed his hat. Kate released him, and they walked into the Garrison. The new girl, Grace – that was her name – hadn’t cleaned up yet. She’d been sitting down and smoking on the job. Not a good sign. He coughed, and that caused Kate to look at him with concern.

Grace handed him a bottle of whisky, but Kate shook her head. “Irish. The most expensive.’

Grace nodded at her as he turned to her. “You can have a drink and then go home.”

“No,” she said softly.

“Kate,” he said hoarsely. “Get out.”

She was silent a moment, and then she said. “I’m not leaving you alone.”

He shook his head. “And you say I’m the stubborn one.”

“You are.” She said as she reached behind the bar and grabbed two clean glasses. “Thank you.”

Grace frowned at her, studying her for a moment. Kate turned, ignoring her enquiring gaze as Grace asked. “Shall I leave you alone?”

He glanced at Kate. She didn’t react. She poured him a drink and handed it to him. He took the glass from her…and that same f**king warmth spread through his body at the sensation of her skin under his. He nodded. “Yeah. Leave us the key. We’ll lock up.”

“Alright, Mr Shelby.” Grace approached and handed him the key. As he lifted the whisky to his lips, Grace turned to Kate. “I’m Grace. And you are?”

“Go, Grace.” He knew that Kate didn’t want to talk to Grace, not tonight at least.

Grace nodded. “Yes, Mr Shelby.”

Grace turned and walked slowly out of the room. He watched while Kate downed her whisky as if she were drinking a cup of tea. As she reached for the bottle to top off both their glasses, he said. “You know, in France,” he couldn’t speak for a moment. He went right back there for a moment. Back to the mud and blood of France. The touch of her hand on his brought him back to the world. “In France, I got used to seeing men die. Never got used to seeing horses die. They die badly.”

She nodded before saying gently. “He was such a beautiful horse.” He nodded. “You didn’t even name him yet, did you?”

“No.” He looked at her as she swirled her whisky around in her glass. He studied her before asking. “How come a rich girl like you drinks whisky like that?”

She was silent a moment before speaking. “A girl has to get through the day without blowing her brains out.” He frowned, and she closed her eyes. “God, I’m sorry. That was wrong.”

“Yeah,” he exhaled as he lit a cigarette. He extended his case to her, and she shook her head. “Have you ever smoked before?”

“No,” she said quietly. “I don’t like the smell.”

He shook his head as he said. “You’re like some kind of f**king saint.” She exhaled and wrapped her wet coat around her body. “You don’t smoke. You don’t curse. Never kissed a man before in your life, so you’ve never f**ked a man either.”

She bit her lip and said. “Saints don’t drink.”

“Eh, some did.”

She smiled. “Who?”

“Matthias. Patron saint of alcoholics.”

She laughed a little bit. “Well, that’s a saint I haven’t heard of.”

“Are you a good Catholic girl?” She blushed just a little bit. “I bet you are. You’re one of those good girls who lies in bed thinking of her future. Probably won’t even touch yourself.”

She frowned. “Why would I touch myself?”

He let out a laugh. “God, you’re so f**king innocent.”

“Not anymore,” she said dryly. “Not after what you’ve done to me.”

He set down his cigarette and stared at her. She was still upset about the horse; he could see that. She was also upset with him. “I haven’t done anything to you, Kate.”

“But you want to.” She bit out. "If not for Polly, you know that you'd be out of control."

She was right about that. Wrong night to say it though. He was in a mood tonight. “The better question is, do you want me to f**k you, Kate?” She instantly choked on her whisky and set the cup down. “I think you do.”

She exhaled. “Thomas----

“Why’d you f**king come after me?” He asked as he stood up. “Why’d you come after me?”

She stared at him before stammering. “The horse.”

“No one gives a f**k about horses at this time of night.” He said as he leaned over her. “You told Polly to tell me to back the f**k off from you. Then you come running after me in the night! Not even f**king dressed!!” She hauled off and smacked him hard as she got to her feet. Big mistake, because that put them nose to nose. They were so close that he could feel her breath on his face. He stood there, staring her down for a moment as that old feeling, that tension between them, grew and finally exploded. He wrapped an arm around her waist, causing her eyes to widen. “That’s how we’re going to play it, eh sweetheart?”

“Thomas---

He grabbed her neck with his other hand and kissed her. Kate let out a garbled sound against his lips. He stepped backwards, finding his chair before sitting down in it. Kate let out a cry as he hefted her up into his lap, spread her legs and settled her in his lap. f**k being a gentleman to hell; he had to touch her tonight before he lost his goddamn mind!

Chapter 15: For one night

He knew he was going to be moving too damn fast for her, but he needed her. He needed to feel her skin under his hands. Needed to feel her body writhe and tremble and hear her scream echo in the Garrison as she came for the first time. He wanted to f**k her senseless but knew that she’d never forgive him and he’d never forgive himself if he took her in the Garrison. She was also the kind of girl that needed to be taken in holy matrimony, not that he objected to marriage. He was fairly certain that he was going to marry her if she’d just stop fighting him!

Right on cue, Kate hit him in the chest with one fist. He would have broken the kiss had this exasperating woman not grabbed hold of his face with both hands. He tugged her deep into his lap, causing her to tremble as she caressed his face softly. She was scared, curious and full of want and desire as well. He kept his kisses as patient as he could, trying to teach her how to kiss. Not that she needed much teaching because her kisses were f**king perfect. He grabbed hold of her back, running his hand up and down, getting annoyed at the soaking wet coat under his fingers, depriving him of the heat of her body.

He grabbed hold of her coat and yanked it off her. She yelped and broke the kiss as he let the coat fall to the sawdust floor. “It’s alright,” he assured her as he pulled her closer to him. “I want to touch you. Not your f**king coat.”

He kissed her before she could say another f**king word. She moaned as he grabbed hold of her wet hair. Her hair…it was so long. Most women her age had cut it. He didn’t know if it was long because her parents had forbidden it or because she liked it long. He hoped it was because she liked it long. He wanted to see her naked in his bed one night, her auburn locks flowing behind her, looking spectacular. He ran his hand down her back to her hips, causing her to tense for a moment. She wasn’t stopping him, so he was going to go for it.

His hand darted under her nightdress, and Kate’s head shot up as he ripped her shorts off her! She grabbed his hand and shook her head. “No! Don’t!”

“Don’t what, Kate?”

“I can’t.” He cupped her entrance with her hand, and she screamed. “God, stop it!!”

He did for the moment. “What is it, Kate?”

She shook her head as she said. “We can’t do this!!”

“Why not?” He asked, growing hard as his hand registered her heat and wetness. “You’re wet, Kate, and I know you can feel that I’m----

“Thomas, you can’t have sex with me because they’ll check!!” She shouted at him.

He frowned. “Check what?”

She exhaled as she said. “Four times a year…a doctor performs an exam to see I’ve been---

“F**ked?” She nodded as her face went red. That was confusing. “Where are your parents from? The 1600s?”

“Some rules are archaic, but as I’ve told you,” she said. “I cannot---

“I don’t need to be in you, Kate.” He said, causing her to frown. Yeah, she knew nothing, making this whole thing utterly enjoyable for him. He leaned forward and rested his forehead against hers. “I’m going to touch you, kiss you and pleasure you. They won’t know.”

“Are you sure?” She asked, whimpering as he pressed his palm against her exposed heat. “I’ll get…into so much trouble----

“Kate,” she jumped as he ran a finger through her dampness, causing her to gasp. “I know what I’m doing. You can trust me for this.”

She shook her head before saying. “We shouldn’t do this.”

“We should.”

“No,” she gasped out. “I don’t want to hurt you---

“Then stop trying to kill me.” He rasped hoarsely against her lips. “I swear to God, we’re both going to f**king explode if you don’t let me touch you! Will you?

Kate nodded, and he instantly kissed her. She let out a sound as she held onto his neck with one hand, and the other caressed his cheekbones. He responded by running his finger along her entrance. Her entire body trembled and shivered, unconsciously causing her to grind atop his hardening cock. She wasn’t even thinking about what she was doing for a change. This was pure instinct, and he probably had the dead horse to thank for this because her guard would never be let down like this. He inhaled and then began to carefully inch his finger into her tight entrance. Kate squirmed and whimpered against his mouth.

“T-Tommy?”

“You’re alright,” he encouraged her as he ran his hand through her hair. He gave her a brief kiss. “You’re alright, sweetheart.”

She inhaled sharply as she whispered. “This is wrong. I shouldn’t do this with you.”

“Then why”, he asked lowly, “does it feel so f**king good, Kate?” She clenched his finger, causing her to gasp. “That’s it, good girl.” She let out a sharp cry, causing him to laugh lightly as he asked. “You like that, don’t you?” She didn’t say anything, but her fever-tinted cheeks answered for him. He grabbed her tightly around the waist and stood up, causing her to gasp. He pushed her onto the table to the left of theirs.

She stared up at him with expressive green eyes. “Tommy?”

“On your back, sweetheart.” She did as he said, her eyes getting bigger as he spread her legs open so he could get between her legs. She wore this nightdress that was innocent-looking enough, but she looked seductive as hell in it. She swallowed uneasily and then cried out as he arched against her entrance. Her reaction was to bring her legs up and grip his thighs tightly. “Good girl.” He said as he surveyed her perfect body under his. “Good girl.” He inhaled as he said. “Undo my trousers.”

Kate looked like she was going to faint. “What?”

“I’m going to make you come, Kate,” he explained as he began thrusting his fingers in and out of her. She arched underneath him. “Give me a little help.”

“I’ve n-never,” she moaned. “God! Tommy!”

She never called him Tommy before until this moment. Right now, when she was out of her mind, he was Tommy. Not Thomas or that f**king Mr Shelby. He was Tommy. He kissed her and guided her hand to the front of his trousers. He kept kissing her and pleasuring her. He used his free hand to caress her perfect breasts, which were peeking through the thin white fabric. When he pinched her nipple, she bolted upright, breathing heavily.

“Easy, easy, my girl.” He rasped. “Enjoy, my love.”

He felt the chill run through her body as she whispered. “Love?”

He buried a kiss in her neck, and she gasped as she palmed him through his trousers. He began moving his body with his finger, giving her the opportunity to realise what it could feel like with a man. When she was wet enough, he added a second finger. Kate had cried out, grabbing hold of his cock as he kissed her nose.

She gasped and looked up at him. “W-what do I----

“Take me out.” He rasped as the room began to turn red. She nodded, flushing red as he guided her to take him in her hand. She flushed red as she wound her hand around him. He exhaled roughly. “There you go.”

She stared at him as she stammered. “G-God. T-Tommy!!”

He smiled as he said it lowly. “I’ll be in you one night, my girl, but not tonight.”

“W-what?” She shook her head. “Why do you say such---

“Because we both know it’s f**king true!” He stated as he stared her down. “You’re the one for me, Kate. And one way or another, you know that there’ll be no other f**king man for you after me!” He kissed her deeply, and she moaned. After a few kisses, he breathed hotly into her ear. “Stroke. Up and down.”

She nodded and did as he said. The first time she touched his balls, he nearly came right then and there. He added a second finger, and she began crying out for relief, her grip on his cock getting slightly tighter, but he didn’t care. She felt good. She felt so damn good even though she had no f**king idea what she was doing. Finally, she came, and he followed. He, however, pressed just the tip of him into her folds. It’d be amusing if she got pregnant, because it’d confuse the f**k out of whoever was examining Kate when she had a virgin birth.

---

She was going to hell. She was going to hell for this! What was wrong with her?! She’d told Polly that she wanted nothing to do with Thomas because it wasn’t safe! It wasn’t safe! She was a princess, the sole heir to the throne, and he…he was an illegal bookie in Birmingham! The mere idea of them touching would have been grounds for him to be hanged! But what they just did – and she knew that he wanted to go further with her. Oh! He would be killed for sure if they went beyond this. But dear God, he was right. This…it felt absolutely amazing. He felt absolutely amazing. He was just as she thought he’d be. Tender, gentle and possessive. Oh, so possessive. He was loving towards her as well, and dear God, she didn’t want him to let her go.

Kate let out a soft sound as Thomas pressed gentle kisses to her neck and face. God, she was in such trouble. He wrapped his arms around her body, holding her close to him as if she were the most precious thing that he could ever possess or love. She inhaled deeply as he kept kissing and touching her. No one had ever touched her like this before, and it felt so strange to feel. She wanted it and craved it deeply, so she was unable to stop herself from clinging to him. She quietly breathed his name. “Tommy.”

“I could get used to hearing you call me that,” he said as he kissed her again. “God, you are amazing, Kate. My beautiful, beautiful girl.”

She inhaled as she whispered. “We can’t do this, Tommy.”

“Yes, we f**king can.” He tucked himself back into his trousers. “Because I am not going to go a single f**king day without feeling you like this.”

She inhaled as she said. “Tommy… I’m trying to protect you. There…is danger---

“Don’t care.”

She rolled her eyes. “I’m serious. Tommy, my family would have you executed on the spot.”

He looked deep into her eyes with those bloody blue eyes of his and said. “Like I said, I don’t care, Kate.”

She inhaled as she said. “Thomas, I’m not joking.”

“I know, but you’re not leaving here.”

“Thomas, I don’t know what kind of girl you think I am---

“My guess is you're a girl from a rich family.” He said simply, causing the blood to drain out of her face. “They kept you locked up and trained you to do everything f**king right. My guess is…you had enough, and you ran away from them.” He traced her cheek with his index finger. “You want to be free, but you’re going back only because you’re feeling guilty.” He shook his head as he said. “But you’re happy, Kate. You’re happy with me…and I don’t think that…I’ve felt happy until I saw you looking up at me from the back of my car.”

She inhaled as she shook her head. “Oh, Tommy.”

“Am I right?” He enquired. “About your family?”

She shook her head as she admitted. “You’re close, Thomas. That’s why… I don’t want you to get close to me. I will leave---

“You’re not.”

“I will leave. One day, you’ll wake up and I’ll be on a train back to London. I do not want you to hurt anymore. Thomas. And I do not want to hurt you. Polly said that I should just let you take whatever you want from me.” His fingers dug into her back. “I told her that it’d hurt you. “She exhaled shakily as she said. “I shouldn’t have done this with you now!”

Thomas chuckled as he said. “Kate…this was going to happen between us anyway. Polly’s advice is rubbish, because…there is no way that you’re ever going to leave me.”

She shook her head as she said. “Thomas---

“Stay.” The soft and gentle way that he spoke to her caused tears to fill her eyes. “Stay with me.”

She shook her head. “Tommy---

“But…right now, I need you, and right now, in this moment, you need me as well.” She couldn’t deny that. She nodded in agreement at his words. He exhaled as he caressed her face. “No more talking, Kate. I’m going to make you come again.”

He laid another kiss on her that caused her head to spin. He pulled her into his arms and sat back in the chair he’d vacated. She felt a tear trickle down her cheek as he held onto her. This man was never going to let her go, and right now… She had no willpower to fight him. She was his, and he’d won the battle. For tonight at least.

---

Chapter 16: The morning light

“So,” he asked as he watched Kate sip at the whisky in her glass like the lady that he knew she was. “What else can you do?”

She nearly dropped the glass of whisky. “Tommy!”

He laughed as he shook his head. “I wasn’t thinking about that, Kate. Yet.”

She started blushing vibrantly as she placed her whisky on the table. “You’re terrible.”

“And you know it,” he stated directly.

She nodded. ”Yes, I do.”

“And it doesn’t bother you?”

She hesitated before shaking her head. “No, it doesn’t, Thomas.”

He nodded with a smile on his lips before leaning forward and kissing her again. She let out a soft moan before caressing his face with her hand. The night was now morning. Kate had loosened up after her third orgasm at his hands. He’d come again, this time with her on her knees with her pretty lips around his cock. She’d been a very fetching shade of pink at first, but she’d caught on quickly enough. That damn minx of his enjoyed it at the end; he could tell by the way she’d been reluctant to pop off his cock. She was now sitting in his lap, her face buried in his neck and a smile on her lips. The passion and want had cooled for the moment, but the need between them was still there. It was always there because they needed each other so much that it was starting to hurt to be apart.

He brushed her hair back from her face, causing her warm skin to flush again. “Any brothers or sisters?”

She shook her head. “No.”

“Lucky.”

She laughed faintly. “No, you’re the lucky one.” The smile on her face faded as she said. “I had…a very empty childhood.”

“What’d you do?” She shot him a look that said she wasn’t going to elaborate. “Come on. Tell me what…one day of your life would be like when you were…thirteen or something.”

She nodded. “Alright.” She thought on it. “I’d get up around 7:00, bathe, get dressed, and take communion.”

He shook his head. “Knew you were a Catholic girl.”

“When I was thirteen. Now…I don’t really know so much. Seems to complicated.” she inhaled. “Go to confession and then go to breakfast. After breakfast, I would be off to take lessons in French, Spanish and Italian.”

He frowned. “Why?”

“So I could learn how to speak all three languages fluently.”

“And do you?”

She nodded. “Yes. I would study each language for an hour. For the next three hours I would discuss the history of the past, present and then history throughout the world. Then, it was time for lunch.” She smiled a little. “I was allotted some outdoor activities afterwards. Horseback riding, shooting and archery for two hours. Then, I had to come in and play the piano for an hour. Practise the piano for another hour. Mathematics for thirty minutes and then reading for 90 minutes. It would be time for dinner then. Then back out to communion and confession. Afterwards, I would go upstairs to bed, and the day would begin again.”

She had no childhood. He thought his life was pretty bad. It was bad, but he had Arthur, John and everyone else to help him get through the day. “Your parents?”

“Communion and meals only.” She exhaled deeply. “Those were the only times during the day that we saw each other.”

“I’m sorry.” He said softly.

“It’s alright,” she trembled as he caressed her face. “It was an arranged marriage. They don’t love each other.”

He pressed a kiss to her lips. She trembled, and this time, he understood why she reacted to every little touch and kiss. She wasn’t scared, not completely. She’d been deprived and starved of human contact. She didn’t know how to handle it. That made him angry. She should have been held and kissed as a child. Even he’d been kissed and held as a child by both his parents. It was so strange. She had ‘everything’ – at least that money could buy – but she’d been deprived of love. That’s why she was so scared of him and so eager to return home, because that coldness was all she knew.

As he pulled away from her, he said. “You’re getting very good at this.”

She blushed red. “I am?”

“Yes. Yes, you f**king are.” He pressed another kiss to her lips. He hadn’t done this in a long time – spent time with a girl like this. He felt like he was a teenager again, waiting under the bridge for Greta to turn up.

“I’m just guessing.” She whispered.

“Feels good though.” She nodded a little bit as he said. “You feel right, Kate. Haven’t had anyone else fit this way in my hands.”

She inhaled sharply and shook her head. “Why…do you want to make this so hard for me, Thomas Shelby?”

He exhaled as he closed his eyes. “You know why.”

She bit her lip and asked tentatively. “You want to f**k me.” He exhaled and looked at her, and she blinked. “What?”

“Really, Kate?”

“Well,” she shifted in his lap. “We’ve been in here for hours.”

“Because when we go back, we go back to our separate rooms. Come the morning…you’re going to try and pretend that none of this happened. Right?” She nodded, causing him to exhale. “So, why do you want to make this hard for me, Kate?”

“I told you,” she said quietly. “that nothing could happen between us.”

“It’s going to.”

She let out a bitter laugh. “God, you’re so arrogant.”

“It’s a fact.” He gripped her chin and made her look at him. Her perfect face was flushed a deep shade of pink. “You’re going to marry me, Kate.” The blood drained out of her face, and her entire body went still. “Someday.”

She stared at him before whispering. “God, you don’t listen to anything I say, do you?”

“No.” He looked past her as he said. “I don’t know much about you, Kate, mostly because you don’t let me get too close. That’s alright. I don’t let you get too close either, but we know things about each other. We see things. We say things that only make sense to us.”

She wiped her eyes. “It’s only been two weeks!”

“I knew the moment I saw you.” He said bluntly. “No one would have touched you if you’d slept in my car. I wanted you in my house. I wanted everyone to know.”

“Know what?”

“That you belong to me.”

Kate shook her head as she inhaled sharply. “God! You…you and your words. You don’t say much…but when you do, you say the most outrageous things, and I know that they’re true.” She shook her head as she said. “I like you, Thomas. I like you a lot.” His heart raced in his chest at those words of hers. “But we cannot be together.”

He exhaled. “You’ve said that a lot of times.”

“I know, and I know you don’t care.” She turned towards him, straddling him. “But I do. I care because I have seen capital punishment carried out.”

“Kate---

“No. You’ve had your say, and I need to say mine, Thomas.” She inhaled as she said. “Believe me when I say that if we were to be discovered in this position, you would be killed instantly. It doesn’t matter if it’s consensual between us. My parents would have you killed for even looking at me!”

He wasn’t bothered. “I’m still willing to take that chance, Kate. I don’t believe it’s as bad as you say it is.”

“I know you don’t believe me, Thomas. Because your world and my world are so different that it seems impossible for mine to be a reality. But it is,” she inhaled as she said. “I got hit for smiling at a soldier boy and letting him shake my hand.”

“So, I can imagine,” he said drily. “If I were to get you pregnant, it would not be received.”

“No!!” Kate shouted as she began to panic. “Do NOT get me pregnant! Promise me!!” He frowned at the unreasonable amount of fear that began rolling off her. “Swear to me on your mother that you will not get me pregnant, Thomas Shelby!!”

“It’s alright, Kate. It’s alright.”

“No!” She shakes her head. “No, it’s not alright! If you get me pregnant, I will be forced to marry whoever will take me! That includes I could wind up with an 80-year-old man, and I DO NOT want someone like that crawling over me every f**king night!! Do you understand me!? Or he could be young and hate the fact that he has to pretend to be the father of your child!” She started hyperventilating as she shouted. “I’m not a British citizen! He’d have the right to beat me, and divorce is NOT permitted!”

He grabbed hold of her face as she struggled to get her shouts under control. “Kate, Kate, it’s alright.”

“No.” She shakes her head. “No, it’s not alright, Thomas! I have to have my parents' approval, but they agreed to let me have a choice in my marriage. So, please. Please! Understand for once that this is not something to joke about! This is very, very dangerous for me!”

“Calm down.” He said gently but firmly. “Calm down.”

“Or they’d bring a doctor in to have the baby taken care of.” She inhaled. “God knows what the Bishop would do.”

“Calm down, Kate,” he said softly. “Calm down. Allright, I won’t get you pregnant for now."

She exhaled in relief. "Thank you, Thomas. "

"There may have been a small shot, but its not likely to have taken in you."

she nodded. After a minute she admitted, "I never wanted children before. It would be something that I'd have to do. "

He held her tighter at those words. "So, you want my children. That's what you're saying Kate."

She shakes her head. “I can’t. This world that you’ve created – it is so beautiful, Tommy. But I cannot stay here, and I will not let you try and talk me into staying in your world. I’ll let you have your moments because I clearly cannot say no to you. But I’m not staying here. Sooner or later, I will be discovered and have to return, or I will have the money and go.”

“Why do it, Kate?” He asked. “Why go back to people that’ll hurt you?”

“Why did you follow orders in a war, Thomas?”

He exhaled as he said. “The war is over.”

“Mine isn’t.” She said quietly. “This…is a quiet moment before the shells start falling again. You…are like the sun breaking through the clouds for me. It’s temporary, but please,” she begged. “Don’t give me false hopes by dreaming that I actually have a chance of getting away because I know that I don’t.”

He held her gaze as he stated. “So, you do want to stay with me.”

She shook her head as she said. “Of course I do. Why wouldn't I?” He leaned forward to kiss her again, but she stopped him. “But I have obligations that fall to me. I have spent every hour of my life devoted to training for the day that I take them over. If I turn my back on those obligations, it won’t just be my family who suffers. Thousands of people will be affected.”

He didn’t like hearing that. “I don’t understand you, Kate.”

“I know,” she said quietly. “That’s why I didn’t want to get too involved with you.”

“Too f**king late.”

“I know. I’m sorry.” She got off his lap and repeated. “I’m sorry.” He exhaled and leaned forward. Why was this so f**king hard? What had her so damn scared that she would ignore the obvious feelings between them and go back to hell? Did she not trust him enough? Because he sincerely doubted that her past was something that he couldn’t negotiate with her. He would get her to safety; he had no problem staking his life on it. She just needed to open up and tell them. He would fight for her, for their future, all the way until that last day arrived. She pulled on her coat and looked towards him. “Tommy… I know that you don’t like this. I don’t like it either. But you are an honourable man who takes loyalty very seriously. While you may wish that I’d just stay here with you…. I can’t because I’m a loyal person as well. While I know that you’d take a bullet for me, this is me taking a bullet for you because I’d rather be miserable every day of my life and know that you were alive and well.” He stood up. “I do care, but I care enough to not let these feelings destroy us. They must be tempered and controlled, or they will burn out of control.”

He was silent a long time. Then he stood up, walked over to her and took her hand. She looked at his hand as he stroked her ring finger, annoyed that there wasn’t a ring on her hand. After a few moments he said. “Tell me who you are, Kate.” She shook her head. “Tell me your name and let me help you. Let me take you out of here. We’ll go somewhere safe. No one’ll ever hurt you again. I promise.”

“I believe you.” She whispered. “But it’s not possible, Tommy. I’m sorry.”

He exhaled as he said. “Hopefully, you’ll tell me before it’s too late.”

“I promised Polly that I would tell you and everyone else the truth before I go. I mean that. You'll know when it's time.” He nodded. There was nothing more to really say. She exhaled and said. “We need to get back home. It’s late.”

He nodded. “Yeah.”

He pocketed her undergarments in his coat. Took one last swallow of whisky before taking her hand and walking out of the Garrison. She locked up, and he took the key. The walk back was quiet and solemn. She held his hand the entire time. They entered the house together, and she waited for him to lock up before they climbed the stairs together.

They paused at the top, and she looked at him; her green eyes were full of worry as she asked. “Will you be alright tonight?”

He nodded. “Yeah.” She didn’t move. “You don’t have to worry about me, Kate.”

“I try not to,” she said softly. “But I do.”

He was silent before admitting. “I worry about you too.”

“I know.” She inhaled and asked. “May I…come in for a bit?” He glanced at her in surprise. She shifted as she asked hoarsely. “Do you promise---

“I do.” He inhaled as he promised. “When I take you for the first time…it’ll be as husband and wife.”

She shook her head. “Oh, Tommy.” He pulled her into his arms, and he held onto her. Her grip was tight as he backed her up into his room. The light was still burning from when he’d run out. He closed the door, and she removed her shoes. He watched her as she got under the sheets. He went to get in the bed, but she stopped him. “Do you mind…being on top of the sheets, please?”

He nodded. “Alright.”

He sat down…and then bent over and pulled off his shoes for the first time in months. He lay on the sheets and pulled the blankets up around them as she scooted close to him. She slid her hand in his as he closed his eyes. And for the first time in years…he slept peacefully.

Series this work belongs to:

• Part 26 of Kate & Tommy