Chapter Text
The Great Hall was operating at its usual decibel: clinking cutlery, half-awake chatter, and the distant sound of someone at the Hufflepuff table spilling pumpkin juice for the third time.
Draco Malfoy was mid-rant.
“I am telling you, Mother will lose her mind if she hears about this—”
The doors to the Great Hall burst open.
Every head turned.
Nymphadora Tonks staggered in like she’d fought a dragon and lost. Her hair was a frantic shade of neon pink, singed at the ends, her robes torn at one sleeve, and—most notably—a small toddler was dangling from her hair like it was a climbing frame.
“TONKS HAIR!” she yelped, trying to pry tiny fingers free. “TEDDY, LET GO—”
The toddler squealed with laughter, tightened his grip, and turned his hair bright turquoise in triumph.
McGonagall stood. “Nymphadora—”
“NO TIME!” Tonks yelled, scanning the room wildly. “WHERE IS HE—?”
Her eyes locked onto the Slytherin table.
Onto Draco Malfoy.
“YOU!” she pointed, nearly tripping over her own boots as she rushed forward. “DRACO. I NEED YOU.”
Draco stared at her in horror. “Absolutely not.”
Tonks skidded to a stop in front of him. “I haven’t even asked yet!”
“I can tell by the child attached to your head that the answer is no.”
The toddler finally detached himself, wobbled for half a second—then launched forward.
“UNCA DWA-CO!”
Draco had exactly enough time to think oh Merlin before Teddy Lupin slammed into his chest in a full-bodied glomp, wrapping tiny arms around Draco’s neck like a koala.
The Great Hall went silent.
Teddy’s hair shifted from turquoise to bright, delighted gold.
Draco froze. “Why is he… warm.”
Tonks clasped her hands together. “Look at that! He loves you already.”
“I am still a teenager, Tonks!” Draco hissed. “What do I know about children? I don’t even like people.”
Teddy poked Draco’s cheek. His hair turned silvery-blond.
Draco grimaced. “He’s mocking me.”
Tonks crouched down in front of them. “Draco, I need you to watch Teddy for a few days. Ministry mission. Important. Dangerous. Possibly explody.”
“Absolutely not. Hogwarts won’t allow it. I have classes. Potions. NEWTs. A reputation.”
Tonks beamed. “Dumbledore already said yes.”
Draco blinked. “He—what.”
“You can take Teddy to class with you,” she continued cheerfully. “He’s family.”
Draco spluttered. “He’ll die.”
Tonks waved a hand. “Just don’t kill or torture him and honestly? You’ll already be doing better than most of our bloodline.”
Several Slytherins choked on their toast.
Teddy’s hair turned Slytherin green and he giggled, patting Draco’s shoulder like this was all perfectly reasonable.
Draco stared at the ceiling. “I hate this family.”
Tonks leaned in, lowering her voice. “Please. Just a few days. You’re smart. You’re responsible. And he already adores you.”
Teddy pressed his forehead against Draco’s collarbone and yawned.
Draco sighed, defeated. “Fine. But if he turns my hair pink—”
Tonks didn’t let him finish. She surged forward, hugging both of them at once. “You’re the best, cousin!”
She kissed Teddy’s hair, kissed Draco’s cheek before he could dodge, and bolted for the doors.
“Bye, Teddy! Be good! Love you!”
And she was gone.
The doors slammed shut.
The Great Hall stared.
Draco looked down at the toddler now happily settled in his lap, hair flickering between blond and silver.
“…Well,” Draco muttered, voice flat, resigned, and faintly horrified. “This will be fun.”
Teddy beamed.
His hair turned dangerously pink.