Chapter Text
"I don't hate you."
She may be a turtle but there's no doubt she's his.
She's a teenager, seemingly around their age, but she's vastly different. Her feautures are sharp. She has the Hamato chin but his mother's eyes.
It's also a reminder of how he failed her.
At the time, he only managed to save four little turtles. Once he got his freedom back and with the lab on fire, minutes away from going sky high, Lou Jitsu ran and never once looked back.
The Hidden City was full of both wonders and horrible memories for him. What was that place like for a child under her care?
"Despite everything she said about you. What you did. I don't harbor hatred for you." She is firm when she speaks but there's something hidden underneath. "Not like she intended."
She's well mannered. Formal. Too formal. Almost as if she's older than what she truly is. A child.
If Big Mama had taken him to turn him into a form of entertainment for all the Yokai down there, what could have she possibly done to a child? His child?
He could take all scars Big Mama decided to inflict on him but this child was deserving of none.
The ones that didn't heal when his body shifted to a rat are hidden under grey fur. She only has her clothes to conceal them. The bandages that revealed a story of pain contrast greatly with the livelier tone of her skin. Many claw marks could be tracked to the same monsters Lou Jitsu had fough a decade ago.
They look bigger on her because no child should have to go through what they did.
He doesn't like the ones that fit perfectly with the spider's hands. Nor the tiny, thin linear ones that nearly approach her wrists.
And the ones deep in the heart are a whole different matter. One that they haven't even scratched the surface of yet.
"I don't blame you for running away when you had the chance" He can read her expression; I would have too eventually, in whatever form possible.
He doesn't want to linger on the implications of that more than what he needs. "But it still hurt."
Something in her lips harden. For a moment, he can see light sparkle on near watery eyes. "Correct."
He almost lost one child and isn't seeking to repeat the expierence.
He had imposed the role of leader on a child too young for it who was more than willing to lose his life trying to be that. Big Mama had imposed the role of Lou Jitsu on her and he could only imagine what she went through; the ideas he could come up with are all horrifying.
Big Mama isn't here but the terror she made them both go through can't be easily wiped away. His first nights in the Battle Nexus and after his escape were among the hardest of his life, next to the day he lost his mother.
He didn't choose any of what happened to him. The only good thing that came out of the Hidden City were his boys. She had no one. He certainly doesn't recall there being any women employed in the hotel and the staff didn't strike him as good role models or even colleagues for a little girl.
Maybe that's why she does her makeup just like Big Mama? An attempt at bonding? To form a connection between parent and child?
Just like all the times his sons had tried with him at one point and he ignored it or just didn't vslue it as he should have?
He wasn't the best father figure to his sons. But nearly losing them made him reflect on his role as one.
He couldn't impose anything on her but that didn't mean he couldn't give her the warmth the spider denied her while growing up in battles, resentment and pain.
Well, better late than never, Splinter suposes.
He opens his arms as an invitation. He means her no harm. He could never.
It takes her by surprise. She stills herself, waiting. She doesn't move to leave the room but her eyes analyze any possible danger.
It takes a little time for her to brave herself enough to take a step foward.
She has to bend down to reach his level. Once she does, his arms wrap around her. Mindful of her shell and his claws.
They stay quiet for a while.
"I cannot undo the past. But hopefully, I can make a better future for you. That is, if you want to."
She has a family but he won't force her into anything she doesn't want.
She doesn't reply with words. She just leans into his shoulder.
His heart breaks when his clothes start getting damp with tears. Her body is shaking but no sound comes out of her.
Oh child. He thinks as he pulls her closer.
Maybe he couldn't protect her back then but she's here now and he's going to make sure nothing hurts her as long as he's around.
Her and her brothers. His daughter and his sons. His children.
"Anata wa hitojorinai."
"... Watasi wa hitojorinai."