Chapter Text
Fear definition:
1) An unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or is a threat.
2) Be afraid of (someone or something) that is likely to dangerous, a threat, or painful.
Fear is an odd sort of emotion. Unlike the others that one is prier to feel from time to time, Fear is something that can hold you down in your spot and never let you go. It can wrap itself around your body like a cobra and slowly, oh so slowly, drain the life out of you until you're left gasping and wheezing for air- even if it's just a little bit you wanted to fill your lungs with oxygen before you might pass out. But it refused. So the only thing you could do was pray to the gods above that it will let you go and leave you be, but that seemed to be far away from it's mind as it only squeezed you tighter and tighter until-
"Hey! Where are you going?"
Chara didn't heard the Monsters voice as he turned tail and ran as fast as his legs can take him and never once looking back. Heart pounding in his ears that was mixed with blood, he ignored the sharp stab of pain that went through his side and only continued to run. He could almost hear a voice shouting at him from the back of his head," Run, run, lost boy, they say to me. Away from all of reality. "
He didn't stopped running as his feet hit the pavement and the sound of children laughing was lost in the wind; he didn't stopped until he nearing his house that gradually grew in the distance. His heart skipped a beat as a grin of relief went across his face when suddenly everything was tumbling down so fast that he barely had time to react. Bringing his arms up like a shield, he slid across the hard ground and let out a gasp of pain. He heard the mingled sound of voices yelling in the wind that was mixed with laughter and taunts, and he immediately knew who was talking.
No, oh God no! Why him?! Why now of all places? Everything was going so smoothly, everything looked like it was going to be okay, so why did he have to ruin it for him?!
He continued to run, the thought screaming in his skull as he scrambled to his feet and never once looked back in fear that he might see something that he'll regret later on. The house was so close. . .! Picking up speed that he almost fell down again, the brunet almost pulled the door off it's hinges with how hard he opened it and slammed it shut with an equal amount of strength before leaning against it. Sweat trickled down Chara's face as he panted heavily before sluggishly sliding to the floor and closing his eyes and letting out a shaky laugh of relief under his breath, not even noticing that Frisk was standing at the foot of the steps the entire time until she spoke.
"How was your walk?"
* * * * *
Do you know that feeling when. . . . when you know that something bad's about to happen but you don't know what it is and you just go along with it and try to shake off the feeling? Like, you know in your gut that something's about to happen, but you just decide to ignore it because you're just paranoid or just overlooking into things?
Well, that was exactly how Chara felt as he listened to what his homeroom teacher was telling them that morning before break. For the first few minutes she was busy organizing the class and settling them down while he was just doodling idly to pass the time and trying to get over a cold that attacked him a few days ago. Then for the other few minutes she was scolding one of the students in class who put Silicon Glue in a girl's hair and sent him to the office (He couldn't help the smirk that went across his face as he watched the poor girl whining about her hair as she was taken to the bathroom before it dries).
It was only near the end of the period that she finally got the chance to tell them her announcement, and she had barely uttered the word "Trip" before the class was in an uproar once more. And it was making him mad. Chara knows that he have a short temper- It was one of the things that he come to love over time- so hearing thirty-something kids screaming and talking at the top of their lungs wasn't helping him with how crappy he felt over the past few days. So he did the one thing he could think of that could shut them up; at least until he can get outta this stuffy classroom and get from fresh air.
"HEY! EVERYONE JUST SHUT UP!"
". . ."
". . ."
". . ."
The whole class went dead quiet. The teacher, a small pudgy lady with short black hair and green eyes, let out a nervous chuckle and looked left and right, like she wasn't sure what to do at the moment.
"A-ah. . . . Thank you, Chara."
He mumbled a "No problem" under his breath as he rested his head against his arms and closed his eyes to try and sleep the headache away while she cleared her throat and smiled at the students before finishing up her announcement. "Well, as you all know, the Social-Studies Department have been discussing this idea for quite some time, but it is only today that they gave us an answer! So for our class trip, we will be going to Mt. Ebott!"
The noise grew tenfold; some even stood up and clapped like they just won the Emmy Award. But Chara could only sit there with his eyes so wide that it hurt but that little fact completely sailed over him. That sudden wave of dread hit him so hard that he felt cold, like he was standing in the middle of the Arctic. A shiver went down his spine as his breathing hitched. Why. . . .? Why was he suddenly so afraid. . . . ? His hand moved up to where his heart was as he gripped his shirt tightly in his shaking hands. Everything started to spin and swirled into nothing more than colors and voices as he looked around in confusion and fear. There was nothing much to see besides inky black darkness, but he couldn't shake the feeling that there was someone with him. But it felt more. . . . . heavier, almost like it was putting it entire weight on him.
"-ra! Chara! Chara!"
He jumped and looked around to see where the voice had came from before he noticed that his teacher stood in front of him with an odd sort of expression on her face. In her hand was a single slip of paper that he assumed was the permission slip, which he took reluctantly and pocketed it away before standing up and attempting to leave when he felt a hand on his shoulder stopping him. The entire classroom was empty except for them, and right now the only thing he wanted was to go home and sleep his life away. Or at least see if the snack bar haven't sold out all the chocolate-bars yet.
"Chara, I want to speak to you for a few moments, if you don't mind."
Oh boy. This is never a good sign. Sighing softly to himself, he nodded his head once and leaned against the wall while she played with her fingers and avoided his inquisitive gaze- A habit he come to realize when she is extremely nervous about something. "So, what do ya wanna tell me, Miss?" She continued to play with her hands and looked even more rattled than she did before. A small frown went across his face.
"W-w-well, Chara, I-I've noticed t-that the other students w-were, um, picking on you a-and I just w-want to know. . . . A-are you alright?"
For the second time that morning, his whole body went completely frozen as he could only stare at her in complete disbelief. How long did she know about this? How was she able to find out? Despite the mini panic that was currently going on in his head he managed to give his teacher a nonchalance grin and shrugged. "Yeah Miss. No need to worry about me- everything's fine and dandy!"
A shadow went across her features as she folded her arms across her chest. "Chara, you know that I do not tolerate any nonsense in my class, right?" He nodded his head. "Well, I also don't tolerate liars either." It was his turn to look away as she knelt in front of him and took his hand in hers, a comforting smile on her face. He didn't like the way she was looking at him one bit- He didn't need anyone's pity from anyone for his own problems. Yet here he was on the verge of breaking down as she waited patiently for him to answer. Several moments passed as the sounds of other students talking and laughing among each other echoed across the empty corridors before he answered in a soft voice that sounded like it didn't belong to him at all.
"N. . . . No. I'm not alright Miss. God, I'm not alright one bit."
* * * * *
"I want everybody to form two lines for me please! I will be taking attendance right- Billy, get down from there this instant!"
Chara chuckled softly as he watched the madness unfold from the safety of the large oak tree he was leaning against and besides him, he saw Frisk giggling from the corner of his eye. Since it was nearing the end of the month, everything have gradually been getting colder so he took his blue jacket with him and lend Frisk his red scarf that wrapped secure around her neck. They were allowed to bring one family member or an outsider with them for the trip, so naturally Chara chose to bring his little sister along with him for the ride.
It took the teacher a good twenty minutes to organize the class and to get them on the bus that was patiently waiting to go, and soon the vehicle was practically screaming with the sounds of excited children voices. For the start of the trip, everything was going well for the twins as they watched this all in silence or just talking about random topics to pass the time. Then the singing started.
A girl in the back row, who had on her earphones at the time, started to hum to this song that Chara didn't know the name of; then like a virus the girl that was sitting next to her joined in and then it spread through the entire bus until everybody was singing together, some doing it at the top of their lungs just to spite the others who was unfortunate enough to be sitting besides them. The sound was horrible. "Augh, someone kill me now. . . !" Chara groaned into his jacket as he buried himself into the chair that somehow managed to stab him in the back from a loose spring that he failed to noticed.
Frisk only gave him a smile and patted him on the shoulder as he groaned again in annoyance. This was going to be a loooooong trip.
* * * * *
"Oh, thanks the heaven we finally stopped!" Chara all but cried out in joy as he bounced off the bus step and spread his arms wide like he was receiving a gift from God. This made some of his classmates stared at him and whispered things about him, but he could care less because he was finally off of that damn bus and away from all that noise. Frisk carefully climbed down and stood next to him with an amused smile on her face and gently paped his cheek to calm him down; which he did almost instantly as he stood still like a statue and watched the teacher organized the class once more. For someone who speaks very little words, she sure have a way of calming him down with a single touch.
The fairly large group stood at the base of the mountain since the bus couldn't go any more due to the steepness of the hill along with the rocks that showed itself to be a bit of a hassle. Trees that could match the height of giants loomed above them and covered everything in a dark shadow, completely blocking off the clear blue sky and the sun that finally managed to won the game and gave the air a cool sort of feeling around it. All around them they can hear the sound of the forest creatures coming to life as some decided to show themselves and watched the Humans walked through their home with curious-filled eyes as they started their long trek upwards.
Talking started out as loud and noisy with the occasional vulgar words or sentences (Which Chara couldn't help but cover Frisk's ears to protect her innocent little mind), bit it soon started to dwindle until there was nothing more than silence aside from the sound of leaves and twigs crunching under their feet. For a good half hour, no body talked to each other as they looked around their new surroundings in awe and taking in everything. Some even took out their phones and started to take pictures of the deer or any other forest creature that they don't see everyday. Chara decided to take out his old fashion phone (You know, the one that flip up like in those animes) and took a picture of Frisk playing with a bright blue butterfly that was one size bigger than the regular ones.
After two short rest, the students, teachers and parents/outsider was soon standing at the entrance of Mt. Ebott that was almost covered because of the thick amount of trees and bushes that grew around it. The whole group went silent when they stepped inside. Thick vines grew from the earth and clung to the walls like their lives depended on it, some laying in heaps among the floor that was littered with the brightest golden flowers they have ever seen that sparked in what little sunlight that was able to pour in through the opening. And situated right in the middle of the cave was a large hole that took up nearly half of the space.
While the teacher started to tell the group about the history of the cave, Chara decided to walk over to it and knelt down a few feet away from the ledge as to not fall down; although he couldn't help the sense of dread that washed over him along with the faint feeling of nostalgia. But the more he stared into the eternal abyss, the more the thought became more tempting. Maybe it would just be more better if he just- No! What is he thinking?! Of course he wouldn't do that! Frisk and his dad would be devastated if he'd ever did that to himself. He couldn't do that kind of thing to them!
And yet..... The thought was still tempting as ever. If he'd jump, then he wouldn't have to worry about being cornered at school anymore. No more hiding in the dark with his family or to the few friends he have. It would all be total bliss. Unconsciously moving his foot a bit more closer to the edge, he let out a soft wistful sigh. It would be quick. Just a simple jump over the ledge, and then everything would get better for him. No more pain. No more suffering. Just total bliss. For a moment, he was about to do it when something caught his attention from the corner of his eye.
While he was deep in his thoughts, Frisk had somehow managed to gain the attention of his bully and was now jumping up and down to try to retrieve her scarf that was held in front of her like a toy only to be yanked out of her reach as they only laugh at her misfortune. Anger quickly coursed through his veins as his crimson eyes flared. No one mess with his Frisk. No one. Mind clouded with rage, Chara practically flew over to their direction and without a second thought gave the older male a hard shove and yanked the scarf away from his hands; his eyes narrowed dangerously as he glared at him with murder in his eyes.
"Leave my little sister alone," he spoke through gritted teeth, which caught the attention of the bully's parent as she scolded," Damien! Leave those poor kids alone this instant!" He paid no mind to her as he grabbed Chara by the front of his shirt and lifted him up so that they were looking into each other eyes and smiled. But there was something off about the way he smiled at him. Whenever Damien smiled at him, it was usually out of spite or satisfaction from a job well done. This one was slow, like he was savoring the anger that emitted through Chara's body and drinking it in like fine wine. This smile was filled with...... lust. He felt his body go cold as his heart froze in his chest with the realization, and he immediately wanted to go as far away from him as possible.
Then Damien kissed him.
It was the first kiss that Chara have ever experienced, and unlike those romance movies he frequently watched (He have a soft spot for those, don't judge him) this one wasn't like how they show it. He didn't felt any fireworks; he didn't felt like he was floating in the universe; he didn't felt the need or passion to tore away his clothes and fuck him senseless; he didn't felt anything but disgust. Disgust of the fact that the person he hated with a passion was kissing him like there was no tomorrow- The same one that made him want to end his life just moments ago. How he held him tight against his chest like how a lover would. Pushing him with as much strength as he could muster, Chara stumbled to the ground as he held his throat with his hands like he was going to choke himself and gagged.
He wanted to throw up. He wanted to do anything to get the taste that lingered horribly in his mouth away. Staggering backwards, he didn't realized that he was going to the ledge until he felt his foot slip and he started to fall. Screams came out of several persons mouth when he felt his body drop, but he was shocked to find out that the one who screamed the loudest was Frisk. She was the first one to move, nearly falling off the edge herself had she not stopped herself at the right moment and stretched out her hand for him to take. She looked downright terrified with tears streaming down her face as she let out another scream.
"CHARA!"
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
You let out a groan as you slowly opened your eyes and weakly turned your face to the left. Tall columns loomed above you that looked like it was recently made, and you were faintly aware of the scent of flowers around you as you made an attempt to move. That plan ultimately backfired on you however when an electric shock of pain went through you like a bullet through the head, and you squeezed your eyes shut to try to rid the pain when something caught your attention. It was soft, but you were able to hear the soft sound of footsteps that was slowly getting louder.
"It sounded like it came from here....." A soft, gentle voice said as you opened your eyes once more and saw the blurry image of a face in front of you. The person blinked once in surprise before adding," Oh, you've fallen down, haven't you? Here, get up....." You took the hand that he offered as he steadily got you up to your feet, albeit you stood a bit shakily and you had to lean against him so that you won't fall down as you held your head to bare the headache that you got from moving. Giving him a faint smile, you thanked him and told him your name. You saw that he smiled back at you.
"Chara, huh? That's a nice name. My name's Asriel."
Throughout the entire time he'd helped you, you never once looked at him until now, and you realized that Asriel wasn't exactly human to begin with. He was your height with teal-blue eyes and two long white ears (You had to resist touching it; it looked so soft...!) that brushed against his shoulders. He still had that smile on his face, and you were able to see small fangs that made him look all the more adorable; including the fact that he wore a yellow and green shirt with the sleeves nearly covering his hands-or um, paws.
Heavy footsteps broke you from your thoughts as a Monster that looked like the older version of Asriel came into view, an expression of confusion and worry written plainly on his features. He was much more taller than the you, with broad shoulders, a golden mane and beard, and two large curved horns. The confusion became more evident when he saw you, and for an awkward moment you could only give him a weak smile and a wave. You almost fell down however when Asriel decided to stop being your support and ran up to the Monster to give him a hug, letting you fall to the floor after only a second of standing up.
"Asriel!" The older monster scolded as he easily picked you up and held you bridal style, and you couldn't help but feel even more tiny against him. Then the feeling faded when you realized just how warm he actually is, and you felt your eyes closing slowly against your will as you nuzzled your body more closer to him for warmth. Sleep was silently calling you and you accepted it as everything slowly faded away into simple darkness.
You don't know why, but you feel like everything is going to get better here.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
"He's been out for quite some time now. Do you think he's ever going to wake up?"
"Well, by the height of which he'd fell, I say that it would take quite some for him to recover. Even with the strongest Monsters who are skilled in the art of healing, we and Humans react very differently to magic. You must be patient, my King."
"Oh, but he's so small..... And his body is so full of scars..... how could something so awful happen to him?"
"Shh.... It's going to be all right, Tori. Like Gaster said, we must be patient."
You decided at this point that you should open your eyes and see what's going on. The voices stopped talking and you heard the tell-tale click of a door closing or opening. Blinking away the blurs, you saw that you were in a fairly large room that was painted white, almost like a hospital would; a large bookcase standing in the far right-hand corner and a desk situated next to it that held a lamp, a cup, and some stationary. A window was besides your bed and you saw a vase of golden flowers sitting on the window pane that added color to the otherwise dull room.
Slowly moving yourself into a sitting position, the sheet that was covering your body slid off and you saw that the jacket you were wearing along with the scarf that you somehow managed to forget was hung up on a nearby chair, leaving you with only your white shirt on as you gazed down at your arms. Thin scars that was barely noticeable decorated along your arm and body, some being as old as you while others were quite recent. They reminded you of the life that was designed for you; the fear of waking up each morning as your inner demons whispered the thing that you wanted to do for so long; the shame of hiding your true self away in a fake and empty smile that held no joy in it, only pain.
Wow, way to make yourself feel depress the minute you wake up.
Shaking away the thoughts out of your head, you got up from the bed and walked over to the door, grabbing your jacket and tying it around your waist and wrapping the scarf around your neck. Exiting out of the room, you saw the same Monster from before talking to someone you couldn't see that well, and for a moment you just stood there not knowing what to do. He must have noticed you because he turned around and smiled at you in surprise and relief. "Ah, you're awake! We were getting really worried for you!"
Another Monster came into your sight as her eyes widen before running up to you and giving you the biggest hug you have ever experienced in your entire life. Before she tackled you into a hug, you were able to see what she looked like for a moment. She reached the Asriel-clone shoulders and had two small horns and bright, kind red eyes and a long purple and white dress with a symbol that you weren't able to identify. But despite her small appearance she was a lot stronger than she looks considering that you might have passed out if it wasn't for the fact that the taller Monster managed to convince her to let you go.
You took several large gasps for air as she started to apologized profusely over what she'd done. "Oh my child, I didn't mean to hurt you more than I should have! I was just so worry for you!" You waved her off, telling her that it was no big deal and gave her a small smile to show that you meant it. She looks relieved and introduced herself as Toriel, and the Monster that resembled Asriel was named Asgore (You couldn't help but noticed how they've gotten the name 'Asriel' from and resisted the urge to smile). Speaking of which, you haven't seen him anywhere since you've woken up.
"Where's Asriel?" You asked, and after fussing around with you a bit more to make sure you were actually okay, they took you to where their son was. While you were walking, Asgore explained that after you have passed out, he took you back to the castle where you were healed by Toriel. But when you didn't showed any signs of waking up, they started to get worried and got the Royal Scientist to see if anything was wrong with you. Nodding your head in understanding you watched different Monsters walked pass you while others cleaned the area around them, stopping to stare at you for a few moments before carrying on like nothing even happened. Maybe they're already used to weird stuff happening around them. Or maybe they were intimidated by Asgore because of his large build. Truth be told, you're still intimidated by him even though he seem so nice.
"Chara!" You let out a gasp as you were tackled into yet another hug, nearly sending you and Asriel tumbling to the ground as he started talking at a mile a minute. "Slow down, Asriel!" You laughed, pushing him away as he grinned sheepishly and rubbed the back of his head. Helping you up to your feet and making sure that you're okay, the goat-monster took your hand and led you away to a new area, occasionally waving at some of the other monsters who would passed by. Weaving through different obstacles that was in the way, you asked where he was taking you and he only smiled in a mysterious way. You found yourself grinning back in return, his excitement practically radiating off his body as you continued to follow him.
After what felt like a while, you finally asked," Alright, why are you kidnapping me?" Letting out a short laugh, Asriel still refused to say anything and instead opened a door that led to what you assumed to be his bedroom. Releasing your hand and heading to the closet, he rummaged through it for a few moment before taking out a yellow and green sweater that matched his one and held it up before you, like he was checking to see if it would really fit you. Nodding his head in satisfaction, he gave it to you before grabbing a nearby bag and getting a few things that you couldn't see before looking at you.
"Well?"
"What?"
"Aren't you going to put it on?"
"Why?"
"Because we're going to do some exploring, that's why."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
"Tra la la. Tra la le."
You looked at Asriel in confusion. He insisted on taking you out to explore the cave, and while you were all up for an adventure here and there, you had a feeling this was borderline sneaking out. The two of you were standing in front of a river of water where a boat was floating peacefully along with a person who entire body was covered in a dark purple cloak, his face hidden in a shadow of darkness. Smiling that little smile of his again, he got on the boat and held out a hand for you to take so that you wouldn't fall over in the water. Without saying a word, the boat started to move on it's own as you looked at him for clarification.
"You'll know when we get there!" Was all he said throughout the entirety of the trip, which was rather short since you could already see land coming into view. The boat slowed down to a stop as the two of you stepped off and thanked the river person for the ride; he only responded with another "Tra la la". Shrugging it off, you stepped on the ground and realized that it was pure white and barren, with little to no life at presence. Tall trees was seen in the distance along with small bushes here and there; and when you looked up you saw nothing but rocks on the surface, making you wonder how the snow even got here in the first place.
"Wow..." It was all you managed to say. Asriel smiled at you, "It's pretty, isn't it? I found this a while ago and I had to show it to you." While he was talking, you slowly bend down and picked up a clump of snow, forming it into a snowball and tossed it at him. He let out a squeak before grinning and quickly forming one of his own, and soon it turned into a snowball war. Both was unaware of the river person looking at them from a distance with the hood of their cloak partially down to show a brilliant purple eye that glowed softly.
"Beware of the boy who colors don't show..."