Work Text:
Neither Dom nor Kel knew whether Raoul had intentionally assigned Dom’s squad to New Hope during their rebuild, nor why he had neglected to recall Dom’s squad after the new refugee camp was built. To be frank, neither of them had wanted to ask the Knight Commander. Kel added Dom’s squad to the regular rotation of guard duties, squad patrols, and training, and life resumed as close to normal as New Hope ever got.
Except that it didn’t, not for the few who had been to Scanra and made it back.
They put a brave face on it, the lot of them, but Scanra and Blayce and Stenmun and the piles of children were always in the backs of their minds. Kel had found Neal sobbing in the infirmary one day when he thought no one was around, and when she had wrapped tight arms around his shoulders he hadn’t had a single quip or cynicism to share. Tobe wouldn’t let Kel out of his sight for any reason, and more often than not Kel woke up to at least two orphans sleeping draped about her room.
The first night Kel had had a nightmare of her own, she had woken up in bed and only years of training had kept her from screaming out loud. She was biting her lip between her teeth so hard she could taste copper, but she hadn’t woken any of her small companions. It took her only a few moments to slide herself out around Tobe, Jump, and the sparrows and find breeches and a shirt to sling on. She only really came back to herself when she was already on New Hope’s wall gasping in breaths of cold night air, and even then the walk there was hazy in her memory. Kel tried to shake off her dream, bracing her hands on the wall and staring down at the heights. She damn near jumped out of her skin when a warm hand touched her shoulder.
“Whoa there, Lady Knight,” a gentle voice that she knew soothed her frazzled nerves. Kel looked over to find Dom standing next to her, his hand still warm on her shoulder. He wasn’t on guard duty, not wearing only an undershirt untucked from his breeches. There were dark circles under his eyes that Kel hadn’t noticed before. Why hadn’t she noticed them? Usually she spent as much of her free time as possible observing Dom’s face - but she knew why. The same reason he was up here, probably.
“Dom,” she breathed, trying her best to collect herself. The image of the still Yamani lake was not forthcoming this time. Instead, every time she closed her eyes she saw Tobe on that steel table, though he never had been there and thanks to her and the others he never would be there. Her fear must have showed on her face, because without a word Dom collected her into his arms and held her there. Kel froze, unused to being the one being comforted, but when it became clear that he wasn’t going to let go she relaxed in his arms. Dom’s arms held her about the shoulders and her own arms slipped around his waist, and Kel just breathed in the scent of him. Somehow, the feel of him grounded her and helped her shake off the last of her dream.
When she began to pull back, he let her go, and they stood side by side staring out over the ramparts.
“What was yours about?” Kel asked him, her voice just above a whisper. There was no one around to wake up; the nearest guard was at the corner post dozens of yards away, but still she whispered.
He didn’t ask how she knew he’d had a nightmare, just as he didn’t ask why she was on the wall. A flicker of his usual lopsided grin - Kel mentally categorized it as his daytime grin - showed on his lips.
“You tell me yours I’ll tell you mine?” he offered her.
Kel let out a quiet chuckle. “Mine’s easy. The kids, on Blayce’s table. I never reach them in time. Yours?”
“Why’d that bring you out here? Doesn’t it help to wake up and see the kids?” Dom asked.
Kel shrugged. “Yes, but sometimes… I don’t know. It’s just so real. I can see them, I can smell them, and I know I’m not going to get there in time. It’s just…”
“Too real,” he finished. She nodded. They stood in silence for a few more moments before Dom straightened and wrapped an arm around her shoulders.
“Well Lady Knight, you need your sleep. Come on, I’ll tuck you in,” he said. He led her back towards headquarters. They climbed the stairs slowly, Dom’s arm still draped over her shoulders. At some point Kel had put her arm around his waist and she didn’t remember when. When they reached her room, Dom took one look in at the mess of animals and orphans on her bed - Irnai had joined Tobe and the beasts - and steered her away again.
“Come on. No one can sleep in that pile,” he said.
“Tobe can,” Kel pointed out with just a touch of bitterness. Dom led her back down the stairs to the level below hers. Kel was getting sleepy, but when he opened the door to one of the rooms she did recognize it.
“Dom - this is your room.”
“I know.” He led her inside and sat her on the bed. He knelt in front of her and slipped her feet out of her boots - they weren’t laced, and she wasn’t wearing stockings. After her boots were off he picked up her feet and used them to turn her body onto the bed.
“People will talk,” Kel murmured. Her eyelids were heavy already.
“No they won’t. Your people love you, Kel. Fanche and Seafas will break anyone’s skull if they’re heard passing around rumors. Sleep, Commander. You need it.” He pulled a blanket up to her shoulders and tucked the tails in around her. Kel yawned widely and turned onto her side, cocooning herself in warm wool that smelt like Dom.
“You never told me your dream,” she whispered, though her eyes were already closed.
“I know.” Kel could almost hear the smile in his voice, but for the life of her she couldn’t find the energy to reply. Her sleep was blessedly dreamless.
*
Dom was gone when Kel woke up, though she was not alone. Two pairs of wide eyes - one accusing and one far too knowing - and the friendly eyes of her dog greeted her.
“You were gone,” Tobe said, his hurt at her disappearance making Kel wish she could just go right back to sleep. She knew she couldn’t though, so she sat up to face the music.
“I know. I’m sorry, my lad, I just couldn’t sleep. Dom found me and let me borrow his room,” Kel said. Tobe’s gaze softened very slightly when she said she couldn’t sleep, though he looked more suspicious than anything.
“It’s breakfast time,” Irnai reported, her dreamy seer’s eyes watching Kel too closely for comfort. Kel stood up and reached for her boots, too late remembering that she had come here without socks, tunic, or hairbrush. She must look a sight. When her fingers found her boots they encountered something else with them. Kel looked down to find stockings, a comb - presumably Dom’s - and one of her blue tunics stacked neatly on top of her boots. Kel shook her head. How could she possibly repay her friend’s kindness?
“Well then, let’s go eat,” Kel said. Tobe kept quiet, though he looked like he was thinking hard. Luckily he had duties to perform in the morning, and Kel’s first activity of the day was training with the refugee children, so she managed to distract him from any questions that she was not in a position to answer. At breakfast she kept her eyes open, but she didn’t see a certain blue eyed sergeant there, to her disappointment. She wanted to thank him.
After breakfast Kel kept Tobe and the other children so busy in training that they barely had time to think, let alone for her boy to poke at her whereabouts this morning, and as soon as training was over Kel informed Tobe that she would be spending most of the rest of her morning dealing with the mountain of paperwork constantly threatening to bury her. Since she had taught the boy to read he had enjoyed it, but even he didn’t enjoy reading enough to voluntarily sit through paperwork. It was nearly lunchtime when Kel put aside her reports and headed back down the mess hall.
This time she did find Dom in the lineup for food, and he smiled at her when she joined him there. It wasn’t his usual smile, his daytime smile full of rakish charm, but a smaller, quieter smile. She liked it. He offered her an apple for her tray, and she took it gratefully.
“Thanks,” she said, and hoped he knew it was for more than the apple.
“No need,” he replied, and she thought he meant it.
“Where did you…” Kel trailed off, suddenly aware of all the people around them and how much she didn’t want to have to deal with rumors.
“My desk chair is surprisingly comfortable,” he said, his voice quiet enough that others would have trouble picking it out over the din of the mess hall.
Kel looked slightly mortified. Surely he hadn’t given up his bed then slept in what might be the most uncomfortable chair in the camp? “Dom, I’m sorry, you shouldn’t have-”
He waved away her half-formed objection. “I was happy to, Lady Knight.” He met her gaze and she could see that again he was more serious than she was used to from him. “It was the best sleep I’ve had in a while,” he said, and she just didn’t know what to say to that.
Somehow while they talked they had loaded their plates with food and now they were at the end of the serving line. Dom’s squad was waving at them, but Kel saw Neal and Merric at another table studying reports with the kind of grim intensity that meant it was only a matter of time before they were in front of her. Better to head them off at the pass. Just as she was to head towards her fellow knights, Dom bumped her with his elbow, his hands full of food.
“I’m on the midnight watch tonight,” he said softly. “In case.” She nodded and smiled her own small smile at him, then continued on to her waiting task.
*
Neither of them were surprised when she showed up some time after midnight, this time in loose breeches and shirt and with a blanket wrapped around her shoulders. Dom was in his uniform, though without his heavy chainmail, and armed with a bow. He smiled somewhat ruefully when he spotted Kel coming up the wall stairs, and when she arrived at the top he took her to the northwest corner to where the men had hot tea bubbling in a small brazier. He filled his cup and handed it to her with a nod to the man on the corner post, then led her back to his post.
He didn’t ask what brought her up there, and Kel didn’t offer any information. The dream was a bit different this time; it had been the children on the table and then a view of the courtyard at Rathausak, strewn with the bodies of her friends, including the lifeless, staring blue eyes of the sergeant beside her.
“Did you really sleep in your chair?” Kel asked, more to break the silence than anything.
Dom grinned. “I did. Had a bit of a crick in my neck this morning -” she elbowed him.
“Dom! You shouldn’t have let me take your bed. I wasn’t thinking straight, but you need to sleep just as much as I do. Especially with night watch,” Kel admonished. Dom just smiled.
“You looked peaceful,” he offered.
Kel fought down an open-mouthed stare. She wasn’t sure why Dom was continually surprising her, but she decided then that she didn’t like it. She liked things in their place, nice predictable things that she could see coming. She didn’t say anything for a while, and they stood peacefully together. Kel wasn’t sure when being around Dom had stopped being a case of fluttering heart and barely-contained blushes and had started being peaceful, but she thought she might like the change.
“Did you see Wolset sparring with your Loey today?” Dom asked, naming an older orphan. Loey was about fifteen, and she had taken to the spear as soon as Kel had started teaching her.
“No,” Kel said.
“You’d have been so proud! She dumped him right in the mud,” Dom grinned, and Kel smiled back. She would have loved to have seen the look on the corporal’s face to be taken down by a girl.
“What did he say?” She asked. She had tried to curtail the mens’ swearing around the children, but times like that might warrant a few off-color words.
“He got up and congratulated her! I think he might have been proud,” Dom said. Kel laughed aloud at that.
“Well I’ll be,” she grinned, “I think your corporal might be going soft.” They chuckled. Dom went on to regale Kel with the tale of Wolset’s new embroidery project, then told her about a prank he was planning on Neal. Before Kel knew it, she was yawning profusely and her tea was empty. When Dom took the empty tea cup from her and secured her blanket more tightly across her shoulders, she knew what was coming next.
“Time for bed, Lady Knight,” he said, his hands on her shoulders.
Kel looked up into his bright blue eyes and the less tired part of her brain wondered why he was doing this for her. She knew they were friends, sure, but she didn’t bother Neal when she had nightmares and he was her best friend. She realized with a tired lurch that though she and Dom were friends, he very rarely called her by her name.
“Just Kel,” she said, her speech broken by a yawn.
Dom’s eyes widened very slightly - if she had been slightly more awake she might have thought something of it, but he bowed teasingly at her. “Very well ‘just Kel’, you need to go to bed. You can take mine again, if yours is still full of creatures.”
“Okay,” she was too tired to argue, and frankly the prospect of another dreamless sleep was very appealing. She waved a tired wave at him and made her way down the stairs. She didn’t even check her room before she made her way to Dom’s and curled into his blankets, and no dreams visited her until the door opening and closing roused her from her sleep at dawn. Dom was off watch and yawning. Kel slid out of his bed, though he tried to protest.
“No, you need sleep now,” she said. She put her boots on and made to leave. She glanced back in time to see the sleepy sergeant lay down on his bed, boots still on, tunic pulling awkwardly at his neck. Kel sighed. This wouldn’t do, not after all he’d done for her. So Kel found herself in the strangely mirrored position of taking off Dom’s boots and tunic, then pulling a blanket up over him. As she tucked the blanket around his shoulders, Dom caught one of her hands and sleepily pressed his lips to the back of it. Kel’s breath caught in her throat.
“G’night Kel,” he said, his eyes closed.
“Good night, Dom.” She closed his door.
*
If anyone in New Hope wondered at the fact that their Lady Knight and the Sergeant of the King’s Own spent an inordinate amount of time together, no one said anything to either of them. Even Neal, who was normally too outspoken for his own good, said nothing. In fact, though neither Kel nor Dom noticed, Neal was one of their staunchest defenders. He and Fanche shut down rumors before they started, and it soon became common knowledge that if anyone were to speculate about the Lady Knight’s private life, they would not like the results. Kel and Dom remained oblivious, to Neal, Merric, and the rest of their friends’ delight.
The rest of the season at New Hope was calm, the Scanrans too beaten to attempt more than pitiful raids that the army quickly repelled, and slowly but surely New Hope built itself up into a regular fort town. Fanche remained village headwoman, and slowly Kel transferred most of the duties of running the day to day life of the camp to her. She knew the end was coming. The border raids were back to a level that could be maintained by knight patrols and the few fortresses scattered along the line, and soon she and the majority of forces stationed in the north would be recalled. She began making arrangements for her orphans, including helping facilitate Fanche’s adoption of Irnai and Loey’s introduction to Buri and the Queen’s Riders. If anyone else noticed that she was tying up loose ends, they didn’t say so.
Orders came a month before the passes would close for the winter. Kel wandered into Dom’s room without knocking to tell him the news, as had become her custom. She kept thinking eventually she would be sorry for walking in uninvited, but he had yet to provide her a reason not to. In fact, he seemed to welcome her every time, and there was rarely a day now that didn’t end with the two of them having tea in his room. Most nights Kel went back to her own space, to comfort Tobe and forestall any talk, but when the nightmares returned so did she. A week before they were to leave, and the eve before Raoul and the rest of Third Company, plus the knights and regular army troops that were dismissed from Steadfast, Giantkiller, and Mastiff arrived at New Hope, Kel found herself back in Dom’s room.
It had been a bad nightmare, this time with her coming in just as Blayce was slaughtering the children. She had woken in a cold sweat and was halfway to Dom’s room before she could process what she was doing. Kel paused in the hallway, her brain very suddenly - and uninvitedly - reminded her that she had no right to keep going to Dom in the middle of the night. They weren’t courting, she had had no implication from him that he wanted to court - in fact, his regular flirting had significantly died off since they had returned from Scanra - and even if they were courting, they were not married and she should not be spending her nights with him. She had no idea what he wanted or what she wanted and blast it all, she should just return to her bed. She had even turned around to go back when the image of the children being killed surfaced again. She shuddered and made up her mind. Even if she wasn’t entirely sure of where she stood with Dom, she knew the nightmares went away when she was with him and she was fairly certain that he wanted her around. That would just need to be good enough.
He woke when she slipped into his room. They had had a long day of packing wagons and going over defense plans with the sergeants who would be staying to defend their home, and Kel knew how much planning and paperwork exhausted Dom. He was always happiest in the middle of a ride, with mud in his teeth and a clear purpose ahead of him. Usually when she came in he would give up his bed for her and sleep on the floor or in his chair, but Kel knew the rest of their week looked a lot like this day had and that he would need his rest. So this time when he lifted the blankets to get out, Kel slid in beside him.
That had his eyes open wide. Kel froze, sure she had overstepped. She and Dom stared at each other for long enough that Kel was beginning to mentally list excuses for her brash behaviour, but then Dom surprised her yet again. He lowered the blankets over her and tucked his arm around her back, tugging her closer to him. Kel lay on her side, her head pillowed on his shoulder, where she could hear his heart. Her hand snaked up and over his chest to tuck in around his other side, and she sighed contentedly.
“Good night Kel,” Dom murmured, turning his face into her hair.
“Night Dom.”
*
The ride south was long, muddy, and arduous. Kel, Merric and Neal stuck together, though they were joined often enough by other friends. They rode primarily with Third Company, though Kel was never sure if that was by her choosing or by her friends’ subtle encouragement. Every night, she and Dom pitched their tents beside each other, and if Kel hadn’t been so wrapped up in whatever it was between them, she would have noticed her former knight master watching her and the sergeant with increasingly furrowed brows. The day that Raoul herded Dom’s horse off to one side of their column Kel was riding up front with Alanna the Lioness, comparing war stories. Dom smiled ruefully. He should have seen this coming. Everyone knew the burly Knight Commander saw Kel as a daughter.
Dom was not at all surprised by the words Raoul said first. “Are you and Kel courting?” He asked, always one to go straight for the point.
Dom shrugged. “No.”
“The lads say she spends nights in your room,” Raoul said. Dom's eyes narrowed. If he found out who’d been talking… He guarded his expression and chose his words carefully.
“Nothing has happened between us,” he said, though that wasn't entirely true, but he didn't know how he could possibly explain the oddities of his and Kel’s relationship to his commander. He didn't expect the man, who knew him and his slightly… womanizing ways, to believe that he and Kel simply slept better together than alone.
Raoul was staring at him, and Dom met his eyes squarely. The knight must have believed him, for he settled back on his horse with a harrumph.
“You're in love with her,” Raoul stated. It wasn't really a question, and if it had been it would have been an easy answer.
“Good. Kel deserves the best, Masbolle, so if you are going to court her you're going to do it right.”
Dom’s mouth dropped open at that. Raoul bit back a grin and rode on ahead, leaving his sergeant flabbergasted by the side of the road.
That evening the men set up camp and built a fire. After supper saw the squad and Raoul seated around their fire telling tales of the battles they'd fought and drinking toasts to their fallen comrades. At some point Kel slipped in to sit with them and was welcomed with a chorus of raucous cheers. Wolset moved over on the log he shared with Dom so that Kel could sit between them, and when she did and slid closer to Dom the men just grinned. Dom took that as tacit acceptance, since his squad was remarkably overprotective of the lady knight and had they not wanted him to court her he'd have found out in a hurry. When Kel leaned into him he glanced down at her, and by the glint in her eyes he knew she'd figured the same thing. So he put his arm across her shoulders and laughed at something Lerant said and tried to remember if he’d ever been happier.
Later, when the men began drifting off to their tents and the fire died down, Dom considered his options. He could wait until they were the last ones up, but he had seen Lerant and Wolset when they were deep in their cups and he knew they had staying power. He could bid everyone, including Kel, goodnight and go to bed alone, or he could make what would be essentially a declaration and ask to walk her back to her tent. He wasn't quite sure how he felt about that last one. It was one thing to quietly acknowledge that there was something between them, but it was a whole other thing to stand up and invite it into the open.
He also wasn't sure what he'd do when he got Kel back to her tent. They'd been on the road more than two weeks now and she hasn't come to his tent even once, and he was beginning to think maybe their arrangement in New Hope didn't carry over to other circumstances. Maybe it had all been a dream, or maybe she didn't need him anymore. That seemed less likely, since here they were at the fireside and she was still there, a solid warmth pressed against his side. Either way, no one had ever accused Domitan of Masbolle of being a coward. He waited until Kel yawned, then quietly asked her, “Is it time for sleep, Lady Knight?”
She smiled up at him. “I think so.”
Dom stood up and offered her a hand to get up. She took it, and once she was standing he didn't let go. He decided leaving without fanfare was the most reasonable option, and luckily Lerant and Wolset were tipsy enough that they didn't question it. The walk back to their side by side tents was quiet, though Dom had found with Kel the quiet never bothered him. She didn't feel the need to fill silence like some of the court ladies he had flirted with, and he appreciated that about her. When their tents came into view though his nerves began to act up. He hadn't thought this far ahead, but perhaps it was better that way.
Dom walked Kel to her tent, their hands still linked. Once there, he cleared his throat and nodded at his tent beside hers.
“I don't have any tea, but...” He gestured hopelessly.
She cut him off. “I do. I could get it, if you want?”
Dom made a decision. “No,” he said, thinking of the time wasted building fires and the fact that it was already late. Kel’s face fell before he realized what that must have sounded like, and it occurred to him that she might have been waiting for him just the same as he had been for her. So he went with his gut yet again. It had been working so far.
He lifted their intertwined hands - and wasn't that proof enough? - and kissed the back of her hand. Kel’s eyes widened. “I thought you'd forgotten about that,” she breathed.
“No,” he said simply. He tugged her gently towards his tent. Kel let him lead her inside. He lit a couple candles so they could see, and started to peel off his heavy outer layers. When he turned around, Kel was still standing in the middle of the tent. She was staring at his bed. Dom glanced between it and her, trying to parse out the look on her face. His cot was small, he knew, but he had hoped that wouldn't matter… Maybe he had been wrong? But to his surprise Kel leaned over the little folding table he set up beside his cot and touched one of the candles there. It had burned down to a lump of wax the previous night and he hadn't been able to pry it off the table.
Kel looked up at him and he knew he’d been found out.
“You could have told me,” she murmured quietly. Dom just looked at her. How on earth had she thought he could do that?
Kel seemed to read his mind. She straightened and stepped closer to him, her cold fingers coming up to briefly touch his chin. “Next time, please tell me,” she said. He couldn't do anything but nod.
Kel shucked her coat, looking a bit more determined than he liked, and then followed it with her boots, tunic, and belt. She was reaching for the laces of her breeches when Dom made a noise like a strangled cat and she stopped. Meeting his gaze, she pushed her breeches over her hips and down, and his eyes had to follow that cloth’s path - there was more cloth beneath the first layer. She was wearing long, tight woollen hose. She shrugged at him with what could only be called a sly grin.
“I dislike being cold,” she said, and giggled at his harrumphing noise.
“Are you trying to kill me?” He asked, though he was pulling off his own clothes at the same time. Kel wriggled into his bedroll and turned onto her side to watch him. Dom was struck dumb for a moment, seeing her in his bed like that, looking up at him with her dreamer’s eyes. She was smiling still from his joke. He shook himself out of his momentary stupor, his heart beating and his mind racing at the sheer audacity of imagining going to bed this way every night, and put out the candles.
Shuffling into bed in the dark was difficult, and made more so by adding a second person into his tiny bed. He wouldn't have traded it for the world. Kel huffed when he elbowed her and giggled when he gasped at her cold feet tucked under his leg and set her head on his chest with a sigh that just about broke his heart.
“Goodnight Dom,” she whispered, then her head came up and she kissed his cheek, so lightly she almost wasn't there. She set her head back down and he could feel her heart racing against him. He smiled. Maybe she was just as affected by whatever this was as he was. Maybe she was just as bad at talking about it. So he turned his face into her hair and kissed the top of her head.
“Goodnight Kel.”
*
It was strange to be back in Corus, Kel realized. The city was a buzz with chatter of the returning Knights and her name was chief among them. She'd stopped the killing machines and was credited in large part with stopping the war. She wouldn't speak to how accurate that assertion was, but it was out there. When the King’s Own rode through the palace gates, they were welcomed by an army of servants and staff. Kel relinquished Peachblossom to Stefan the hostler with a grateful sigh, her body already looking forward to the bathhouse. She had business to attend to first though, she thought, looking down at her little blonde shadow. Tobe had stuck to her like a burr since they had come into view of the city, and she needed to sort out where exactly they would be sleeping. For that she would need a servant and money and - her mind raced away with tasks to be completed before she relaxed.
To her everlasting joy, a face appeared in the crowd and silenced all her worries.
“Lalasa!” Kel called. Her former maid was already crying ten steps later as her arms came up to hug Kel. The knight sighed in relief. It was strange, surely, but it was good to be home.
“And who is this?” Lalasa asked, wiping her eyes and setting her hands on her hips to smile down at Tobe. Tobe tucked himself a bit closer to Kel’s, which brought a smile to her face. She didn't think Lalasa had ever intimidated anyone.
“This is Tobe. He entered my service on the way north, at Queensgrace,” she said, ignoring Lalasa’s knowing look, “Tobe this is Lalasa. She was my maid when I was a page, and now she runs her own dressmaking shop in the city.” Tobe chirped a quiet hello.
“Pleased to meet you, Tobe. Now, both of you look bone tired. Let's get you food, baths and bed.” Lalasa wasted no time in shepherding her exhausted charges off in the direction of the mess the Own ate at when they were present in the palace. Kel was yawning so frequently she almost couldn't get the question out as they walked.
“Why’re we going to the Own?” She asked. Unmarried knights had their own section of rooms above the page and squire wings; theoretically she should be out there.
“I thought you'd want to be near your lord Raoul and the men. Shall I ask for you to be moved to the knights’ wing?”
Kel shook her head. “No, this is good.”
“Though I think we should see about a suite with an adjoining room, if master Tobe is to stay with you,” Lalasa said. Tobe looked fearfully at Kel.
“He’ll sleep in my room for now. She's right though, you know,” Kel said to her boy. “We’ll discuss it tomorrow.”
They had reached the mess hall and Lalasa steered them through the serving line and to a table. She sat with them, though she didn't eat, and filled Kel in on the court goings-on. Apparently her parents were in Corus and anxious to see her, and her sister Adie was expecting. Kel listened to all of it, adding her own comments in yawn form most often. Once her former maid had determined that they had had enough to eat, she bustled them off to the bathhouses. Kel shuffled through her bathing routine and nearly needed to be woken up from dozing in the hottest tub before Lalasa bundled her off to bed. Tobe was already asleep on a pallet on the floor, and Kel dropped into bed knowing she'd be following him quickly. Lalasa put out the lamps in the room and patted Kel’s shoulder as she headed out.
“It's so good to have you home,” she said.
Kel yawned wide. “It's good to be home.” She drifted away thinking of northern mountains and men with blue eyes.
The following morning found Kel at the training yards while Lalasa arranged to have her room traded for one with an adjoining space for Tobe. As much as the lad didn't want to be parted from her, Kel knew he was going to get older and then need his own space, and if she was planning to make the palace her home she'd best get it sorted now. She also wasn't about to let his training lapse, not when he'd shown such an aptitude for the spear.
She and Tobe were practicing three and four move combinations when the Own arrived.
“Kel!” Someone called. Kel grinned but finished her block of Tobe’s strike. Then she turned and strode for the fence. Dom’s squad were ranged along the fence, and the sergeant had been the one to call her. Though they'd all arrived in Corus at the same time the lads had had to settle into their barracks the day before and she hadn't seen them. Kel greeted the men with handshakes and smiles before settling against the fence. If anyone noticed that she chose the spot closest to Dom they didn't say a word.
“Where'd they put you sorry lot?” She asked. The Own had barracks, but there were three long buildings, one for each company.
“First building, closest to the yards,” Wolset replied. “And you?”
“I'm not sure yet. Lalasa is trying to get us moved so Tobe has his own room,” Kel said. The men grinned. They knew how much Tobe did not want his own space; it was an ongoing argument between the knight and her boy.
“In the Own’s wing?” Lerant asked. Something in his face said it was important to him that she were still in the Own's space, and that warmed Kel. She liked that the men wanted her to belong with them.
“If I can help it,” she said. The men nodded.
“We’re about to go for breakfast, care to join us? My lord has words for us after we’ve eaten,” Dom said. Kel and Tobe agreed and the group headed down to the mess together.
The news from Raoul was as expected: a month off, rest and relaxation for the Company. Kel, having no orders from the crown or Raoul, also had time off. She and Dom glanced at each other when Raoul said so, and Kel wondered what would happen to them now. Surely their closeness hadn't been just a product of the war, had it?
Her question was answered only moments after breakfast ended. Dom caught up to her outside the mess hall and tugged her to one side of the corridor.
He looked nervous. “Kel, I…” His face reddened slightly and he trailed off. Kel fought a smile. She had seen Dom flirt before with court ladies and it had never once included blushing or shifting his weight from foot to foot as he was now. That had to be a good sign, hadn't it?
He tried again. “I know this little place in the city, best roast chicken around. We could go, if you aren't busy?”
Kel struggled not to beam at him in an entirely un-Kel-like way. So he did want this. She was nodding before she found the words to reply. “That sounds lovely,” she said. Dom relaxed and looked incredulous all at once.
“Really? Great. Good. Okay, tonight, second bell of the evening?” He asked.
Kel’s smile slipped out and she nodded. Dom grinned the smile that made her heart flip over. Dom began to walk down the hall, away from her, and she had to admit that she watched him go. She reddened slightly when he looked back over his shoulder and caught her watching, and then he called, “wear good shoes, there's dancing!”
His grin turned wicked at the face she pulled.
Regardless of Kel’s personal feelings on dancing she was dressed for it when Dom showed up to her new rooms. Lalasa had managed to talk the palace servants into moving Kel to a two bedroom suite directly across the hall from Raoul’s, and not for the first time Kel wondered if her former knight master had designs on her future. Lalasa had also managed to talk Kel into wearing a dress about as soon as she had heard she was going to the city with a man, leading Kel to speculate on where her timid maid had gone and who this verbose, convincing woman was.
So there she was, palms sweaty and itching to be wiped on her pretty green dress. Lalasa had made it, so it fit like a glove, and thanks to several petticoats and a corseted top she even had an hourglass-esque shape. The green dress supposedly brought out her eyes, and it was decorated with paler green embroidery and jet beads, with long tight sleeves lined with jet buttons. Kel actually quite liked the dress, and Lalasa had put her hands over her mouth when she saw Kel in it, which she figured was a good sign.
Kel located a handkerchief and wiped her hands on it. She contemplated sticking the handkerchief down her corset, but she didn't think it would fit. The scoop neck bared more cleavage then she was used to, and she wasn't sure how exactly to deal with that.
“Stop fussing,” Lalasa said, plucking the kerchief from Kel’s hands.
“I can't. I have no pockets, no pouch, no knife…”
Ever practical -and though she knew that that wasn't what Kel was fussing over - Lalasa retrieved a black sash and tied it about kel’s hips. She looped Kel’s Raven Armory knife over the belt and tucked the handkerchief into the side.
“There. Now you have no reason to fuss,” she said, and waited.
Kel knew what she was waiting for. “What if he doesn't like me in dresses?” She blurted.
Lalasa smiled. “Lady Kel, that is the silliest thing I've ever heard. If he liked you in the middle of Scanra with blood in your hair and mud in your teeth, he’ll like you in a dress.” Kel never had been able to keep anything from her maid.
“She’s right, you know,” came the last voice she wanted to have hear her insecurities. Kel whirled - her door was open, and Dom was standing in the doorway. He was staring at her like he'd just looked at the sun. Kel blushed hard enough that it travelled down her neck and wished hard that she had a fan behind which to hide her face. She felt herself slip behind her Yamani mask. Dom saw it too, and crossed the room in quick strides. He lifted her chin with his fingers.
“Kel,” he murmured, “please don't.”
She looked up at him, eyes searching his. She sighed and let her mask go. This was Dom, Dom who had seen her afraid, hurt, exhausted, sleep-addled, and angry. Dom saw her relax and leaned in to kiss her cheek.
“Thank you,” he whispered in her ear. “Now let's go.”
Kel put on the new coat Lalasa had made for her in her favorite russet color and they headed out with a wave at her former maid. Kel finally took the opportunity to take in Dom all dressed up. He wore dark blue trousers and well loved black boots, with a white shirt and navy tunic that had silver braid along its edges. The navy brought out his eyes and Kel thought the look suited him.
“Like what you see?” Dom asked, eyes sparkling, and Kel realized he was flirting with her. During their stay in New Hope they'd been close, very close, but they hadn't flirted. Kel reacted now the same way she always had to him - she swatted his arm. This time though he caught her hand and tucked it around his elbow, then used it to pull her closer to his side. She went willingly.
“Yes,” she said simply. Dom reddened slightly. They chatted lightly on the way to the inn, and as they approached it Kel could see why Dom would like it. It was easy to hear the inn; a mess of people laughing and loud, fast music poured out of the building.
“It's not exactly an intimate evening,” Dom said a bit ruefully, but Kel was smiling. The music was infectious.
“No, it sounds fun,” she said.
Dom stopped in his track. “Fun? Did Lady Knight Yamani Lump just say something seems fun?”
Kel scowled and swatted him again. “I like fun,” she protested.
“I don't believe that, but I stand willing to be proven wrong,” he jibed. Kel put her nose up and stomped into the inn. She saw quite a few soldiers there probably celebrating their return from the war. She handed her coat off to a girl behind the bar and plunged into the crowd, ignoring startled whispers behind her as people recognized her. She didn't have to wait long.
A fellow in army maroon approached and bowed deeply to her. “Milady, I'm Corporal Dennis with the 8th Company. We were fightin’ three killin’ machines when you took out Blayce, knocked ‘em right out. Would you do me the honor of a dance?”
Kel set her hand in is. “I would be honoured, Corporal. Be warned, I can't dance half as well as I can fight.”
He grinned at that. “No worry, milady, it's easy to pick up.”
And so it was. The musicians beat a fast tempo and though she misstepped several times the dance was straightforward enough. Dennis swung her by their linked elbows and then they promenaded up the line of other dancers to start over, their feet skipping lightly. When the dance finished both she and Dennis were laughing. They bowed at each other and Kel left the floor in search of Dom. She didn't get far before another soldier, this one from the 5th Infantry Brigade, approached her for a dance, and then the ice was broken. She was swarmed by men - mostly soldiers - who had heard of her. Kel laughed and chatted with them, but was more than a bit relieved when Dom elbowed his way into the crowd and scooped her away.
“You did look like you were having fun,” he said, continuing their earlier conversation like it hadn't been interrupted. “But that's the last time I let anyone steal you away from me tonight.” His eyes were darker than usual when they met hers and Kel’s breath caught.
“Took you long enough,” she teased. She liked the way his eyes widened at that. She let him lead her back out onto the floor as the band picked up again.
It was well past the midnight hour when they made the long trudge back up the hill to the palace, but Kel and Dom were still full of energy. They had danced until their feet were sore and Kel couldn't breathe around her corset, then sat to eat the aforementioned chicken. Kel had even tried some of the inn’s specialty potato-based alcohol, and found it quite good. She and Dom were leaning on each other, their arms strung together. Dom walked her to her room and paused in front of her door.
“We’ve done this a bit backwards, haven't we?” Kel asked suddenly, thinking she'd like to invite him in and then realizing that that wasn't exactly new.
Dom ducked his head but grinned shyly. That was a look she never thought she'd see on him. “You never do things in the usual order, Lady Knight.”
“I probably never will,” she said, “does that bother you?”
Dom straightened up and met her gaze. “Not at all.”
Kel sighed as something in her clicked into place. “Good. Then come in, if you please, I'm tired and I'd like to have a decent night’s sleep.” Dom took her meaning and his fingers squeezed hers. He lifted her hand up and kissed their joined fingers.
Dom followed her into her room, which was mercifully bereft of Tobe or the animals. Kel stuck her head into Tobe’s adjoining room and saw that he was asleep and the beasts had piled onto and around him. She closed his door and looked around to find Dom in the middle of her bedroom, looking like he wasn't sure what to do next.
Kel considered for a moment. Things were increasingly awkward between them, and she didn't understand why. In New Hope everything had seemed so easy, almost natural. But now… Perhaps it was because in New Hope they had known what they needed from each other. Comfort, mostly, and warmth and caring. Now that there had been tacit admissions on both sides, it wasn't quite so clear. Kel almost harrumphed at that. She'd have thought admissions would have made things clearer. Regardless, the question now was how to clarify.
Kel decided to trust her gut, as she had at every stage of this odd journey. She turned around and pointed at the row of buttons down her back.
“Can you unbutton me?” She asked. Dom made that strange noise that reminded her of two seagulls fighting, and Kel fought not to look over her shoulder at him. Act like it was normal, let him acclimatize… Then his fingers touched her shoulders and Kel had to stifle a similar noise herself.
“You're trying to kill me,” Dom accused softly.
At that Kel did look over her shoulder. “Would it be such a bad way to go?” ”
Dom leaned in, his hands ghosting down her shoulders to her upper arms, and kissed her neck. Kel sighed and the sound came out a little louder than she had expected. Dom stepped close enough to her back that she could feel the heat of him through her dress, then started to undo her buttons. He worked through them slowly, one by one, his fingers heavy on her back, until Kel was pretty sure her knees were going to give out. The last button came undone and the dress slid to the ground so Kel could step out of it. Now she was only wearing her thin white linen underdress, her petticoats, and her corset. Dom ran his fingernails up the bones of the corset. Kel shivered. She made her oddly dry throat produce words.
“The corset,” she rasped. She could hear his breathing, and to her great relief it was more than a little raspy as well. He fumbled the ties of her corset twice before he gripped them well enough to untie them and began to unlace her. Kel couldn’t resist a sigh of relief as the constricting garment came off, and Dom chuckled. Kel slid off the layers of petticoats until she was left in only her underdress, and then she steeled her nerve. She turned around so she could see Dom.
He was still fully dressed, which put her at a disadvantage. He was looking at her like she had taught the sun to travel across the sky though, and that did much to alleviate Kel’s fears. She nearly shook her head at her own anxiety; after all hadn’t Dom been here to sooth every one of her fears, whether he knew about them or not? Kel reached for him and undid his belt. Dom’s hands came up like he was about to stop her, but instead he just looked down into her hazel eyes and said, “You’re sure this is what you want?” He asked, his eyes worried. His pupils were blown wide open though and his breathing was as ragged as hers was.
Kel licked her lips and watched the way his eyes followed her action. Instead of speaking she raised up on her toes and pressed her lips to his. Dom lasted a split second before he wrapped his arms around her and his tongue played at her lips. Kel let him in and let him take over, completely unused to letting others or her body be in control. She trusted Dom though, and she trusted her instincts. She knew there would be no interruptions this time, no birds or dogs or maids or knight masters. If she wanted this, it would be hers.
She kept enough presence of mind to maneuver them backwards towards the bed and to let go of Dom when his knees hit and he sat down. She knelt in front of him and reached for his boots, pulling them off one by one. His socks followed, and then his tunic. Wordless, Dom let her undress him until he was down to his shirt and breeches. His hands pulled Kel’s face to his again, and Kel let him guide her legs to settle on either side of his as he pulled her onto the bed with him. He lay back with her over him. She chased him down, their kisses coming faster and harder. Dom’s hands found Kel’s bare thighs and traced their way up to her hips and she gasped against his lips. Dom’s strong arms wrapped around her and he flipped them so she was on her back on the bed and he was between her legs and Kel had never experienced anything that felt so right.
Dom looked at her like he was drowning. “Kel…”
She understood. He needed her to say it, so he knew. She had thought maybe their wordless admissions to each other were enough, but sometimes words were needed. So she tried.
“I want this,” she said, kissing him for punctuation. “I want you.”
To her surprise Dom’s gaze dropped away from hers and he looked… upset. She froze. Had she done something wrong?
“Kel…” He cleared his throat. “You’re, well, you’re the best thing that’s happened to me. I...I can’t, if it’s just… this, and I might lose you. I want to do this properly, I want to court you.”
Kel smiled, and then she started to laugh.Dom looked at her like she had sprouted another head but she laughed, and when he would have gotten up off her she pulled his head down and kissed him again, a quick press of lips.
“You Meathead,” she whispered, “you don't need to court me.”
Dom looked confused and Kel struggled with how to explain it to him. No one else would have done for her what he did, from befriending her as a squire to making sure she felt welcomed in her first command to taking care of her after the worst episode of her life. Dom had been there for years, and if she were honest she had been in love with him for nearly as long. She didn't think he was quite ready to hear that though. She had to say something though, because he was looking more and more despondent the longer she went without answering.
Suddenly Kel was struck by doubts. She was certain Dom didn't do what they'd been doing often; it had a level of intimacy she thought was maybe unusual for either of them. But maybe she'd misinterpreted his meaning all those nights. She had thought perhaps it was a bit like courting, in an odd way.
“I mean… I thought… We sort of… Skipped that?” He looked a bit more lost and a bit hurt as well. Kel backtracked quickly.
“No, that's not- oh Goddess, I'm bungling this aren't I.” She took a deep breath. Dom was watching her with a hint of amusement in his eyes, and she was simultaneously angry at the thought he might be entertained by her struggle and relieved that he didn't look hurt anymore.
“I want to court you too. I want to be courting. But Dom, I'm not exactly a delicate flower of a girl and I don't think I'm about to become one. I don't need ‘proper,’ I need what we have. I want you, just the way we are, no bells and whistles.” Now it was Kel’s turn to look nervously away. When she chanced a glance back up at Dom he was smiling the soft, warm smile she was coming to refer to as his nighttime smile. The one reserved just for her.
“How did I get so lucky?” He asked softly, then leaned down to kiss the top of her nose.
“It's the eyes, mostly,” Kel teased. She could feel that the moment has passed. Dom must have agreed as he shifted his long body down beside hers and pulled her into his side.
Dom kissed the top of her head, like he had done so many times, but this time she tilted her face up and he redirected to her lips as well. Kel smiled up at him.
“Goodnight Dom,” she whispered.
“Goodnight Kel.”
*
The teasing, when it came, was minimal compared to what Kel and her friends had subjected Neal or Owen or any of the others too. Third Company complained good naturedly that they barely saw the sergeant anymore, and bothered him to no end when they noticed that his small cache of belongings was slowly leaving the barracks. Neal, the first time he came to Kel’s quarters and found his cousin’s shirt draped over a chair, didn't let up in his lecture of her until Dol himself showed up to punch him and call him a Meathead. But the people whose opinions Kel cared most about - Neal included - were all quietly pleased in one way or another.
Though Kel had said she didn't need proper courting, she still let Dom take her out to dances and dinners in the city, where the people danced with as much grace and stiffness as she did. They walked and rode for hours, and they barely left each other's ’ sides. Sometimes they brought Tobe along, and to Kel those occasions actually felt like they could be a family. Though it made her heart ache, Kel couldn't remember being happier.
When word came down, two weeks into their leave, that two villages in the Royal Forest had been cut off from supplies their blissful winter ended. Third Company was assigned to clear the roads, and though Kel volunteered to go with them Raoul turned her down with a rueful grin.
“One of us should get some rest,” he told her.
Kel wasn't sure what he had thought she'd be doing while the Company was away, but resting certainly wasn't it. She now understood how Neal and Roald had felt being assigned to the north so far from their ladies. She paced her room so much that first day that the sparrows had to call in Neal and Yuki and the lure of their baby daughter to get her to stop fussing. Even so it couldn't keep the fear from the back of her mind. She tried to explain it to Yuki while she bounced their chubby baby on her knee.
“I’m used to sending my friends into battle,” she said in Yamani, “and not knowing where they are or what they're fighting. This feels different.”
Yuki hid a smile behind her fan. “This is because you're in love,” she said.
Kel shook her head. “No, it's something else. Something’s wrong, I can feel it.”
Yuki didn't bother to hide her smile at that. “I never thought I'd see the day the Protector of the Small was pining,” she teased.
Kel scowled at her friend. The baby laughed. “I'm not pining. I'm worried. I trust my instincts, Yukimi-chan, and something is wrong.”
Kel was proven right only days later, when Tobe came barrelling into their rooms, straw in his hair. He had taken up with Stefan the hostler, who was also helping him learn his horse magic. This also meant he could keep an eye on who was coming or going, and he had turned into quite the gossip. Now though, Kel knew who it was about before he could get the words out. She was pulling on her jacket as he panted, “Third Company sighted in the Forest, got wounded.”
They ran. Later Kel would reflect that her boy was just as worried as she was and she would wonder when he had grown so attached, but just then there were no thoughts except fear.
They came into the courtyard as the Own rode in, and Kel could see immediately that there had been some hard fighting. Two men were on stretchers slung between two horses and several others were bandaged. Kel didn't see Dom though. She heard someone call her name and registered Raoul dismounting, then a flash of blue caught her eye and she turned to see Dom leading his horse. His arm was bandaged and in a sling. He was muddy and looked like he hadn't slept in days. Whatever Raoul was saying was lost on Kel. She tried not to run, but it was dawn hard. Tobe didn't have the same problem. He ran to Dom and took the reins of his horse, which Kel knew to be how Tobe showed affection. Dom ruffled the boy’s hair, but his eyes were locked on Kel.
She forced herself to walk to him, though she couldn't exactly call it a stately walk. She stopped half a step in front of him and motioned at his arm, heart pounding. “Alright Dom?” She asked.
Dom grinned, though it was a bit lopsided. “Just a scratch. Did you miss me?”
She scowled. “Not at all.”
Dom tossed his head back and laughed, and once he was finished wiping his eyes he slung his good arm around her shoulder and kissed her temple. “That's my girl,” he said.
“Make sure he sees the healer, Kel,” Raoul bellowed at them across the yard, and Kel took that to be dismissal enough that she turned her head so she could kiss Dom’s scruffy cheek.
“Let's go home,” she said. Dom looked down at her, his nighttime smile leaking out.
“Yeah?” He asked, and Kel felt like her answer meant more than just that.
“Of course.” She craned her neck to find Tobe. “Dinner, my lad?”
He tucked his happiness behind his characteristic scowl, but nodded. “Yes mother.”
So Kel and Dom went back to their room in the Own’s wing and Kel let Dom convince her that he didn't need to see the healers quite yet. In fact, she let him convince her of a great many things, like that she may have been missing out all these years. Afterwards as they lay in bed debating how long they had until Tobe returned and they had to get dressed, Kel sighed happily. Dom caught her sigh and kissed her, his own happiness shining in his eyes.
“Happy I'm home?” He teased, though he knew she was happy for more than that.
Kel’s eyes crinkled. “Home. I like that.”
“Good,” Dom said. “I mean to keep it that way.”
Kel’s eyebrows rose and she lifted herself up on an elbow so she didn't have to crane her neck to see his face. “Meaning?”
Dom tried to keep his face serious. “Lady Knight Keladry of Mindelan, Protector of the Small, would you like to be happily unmarried with me? I'll put up with your menagerie of strays if you can handle my penchant for getting hurt in combat.” He grinned when she poked him, but neither could keep the smiles off their faces.
“I can think of nothing I'd like more,” Kel said, and she meant it. Dom kissed her thoroughly and then settled her against his shoulder.
“Good, that's settled. I figure we have an hour? Maybe two before Tobe comes home, do you fancy a nap?”
Kel’s eyes were already closed. Dom kissed the top of her head and whispered, “Goodnight Kel.”
“Goodnight Dom.”