Work Text:
JJ is now back at work after Will's funeral. She is glad she had the support of her team. Her family. Spence. She is still surprised, but happy, that he came to support her and the boys.
She was in her old office. She needed a place to breathe. Suddenly, she realized, Will is gone. "How could he leave me?! We were in this together!", she thought. That's all she could think about, until...a heaviness in her chest. She felt like she couldn't breathe. She started taking about 40 breathes a minute. A panic attack.
She trying to figure out what she should do. She pulled out her phone and dialed the only number she could think of. The only person that could help her through this.
"Hello?"
She heard the voice on the other end of the phone and tried to talk. Nothing came out of her mouth. Only heavy breathing.
"JJ? JJ, are you ok?"
"I need you. I'm in my old office. I can't breathe". Every sentence came out softer. She wasn't sure if he heard her.
"I'm on my way!". The line hung up. Her eyes started moving left to right so fast. She tried to breathe, but it felt like an elephant was sitting on her chest.
————- 10 minutes later —————
The doors to the bullpen open so fast. A man ran through the bullpen to JJ's old office. Everyone in the bullpen was shocked.
"Was that?", Emily asked.
JJ looked up to the door to her old office opening to reveal the one person she needed.
"Spence!"
Spencer walked over to the couch where JJ was. He knelt down to her level. He looked at her.
"What's wrong?", Spencer asked so softly.
"He's gone. He's really gone. I can't breathe. How do I go about my life without Will?", JJ asked.
Spencer pulled her into his arms. He rubbed circles on her back. "JJ. I'm so sorry. It won't be easy, but you have to take it day by day. It's what I had to do when Maeve died. I took it day by day. It gets easier. No one is asking you to be completely better today. Or even tomorrow. You just lost your other half. You have to keep going. If not for you, do it for Henry and Michael. They need their mom".
"Look at me, ok?", Spence said so softly. JJ is still breathing heavily. JJ looked up and looked at Spencer. Tears were almost falling on her cheeks.
"You need to slow down your breathing. You're alive. You're here. I'm here with you", Spence said so sweetly. Spence grabbed her hand, and put it on his chest where his heart is.
"Take a breath. Feel my heart beating. Breathe in time with my heart beating". Spencer looks at JJ.
JJ starts to slow her breathing. She looks up at Spencer. She smiles.
"Thank you, Spence".
"You're welcome. I told you I'm always here for you. I meant it".
"Spence.....I need to tell you something"
Spencer looks at JJ a little confused.
"What's wrong JJ?"
"Nothing's wrong. I just need to say something."
JJ takes a deep breath and begins.
"Do you remember what Emily said at Rossi and Krystal's wedding back then? About twin flames."
"I do. Why do you ask?"
"Nevermind. I shouldn't have said anything". JJ gets up from the couch and walks toward the door. Spencer stands up and grabs her hand. JJ turns around.
"JJ. Look at me. You can tell me anything. You're my best friend. Why did you ask about the twin flames?", Spence asks sweetly.
"I still love you, Spence. I know it's been a few years since I told you, but I still love you."
Tears start to fall.
Spencer looks at her with such admiration.
"I didn't say anything then, but I heard what you said to me when I was in the hospital bed after being shot. How you wanted me to wake up so you have more time with me. I don't know how you feel, but hearing those words made me love you more".
Spencer looked at JJ with so much love.
"JJ....I've never said these words to any girl, but.......I love you. I've loved you since I met you. You're so beautiful. Not just your physical appearance, but the way you treat kids, not just your own. You are an amazing mother to Henry and Michael. When Will said that he asked you to marry him, I was upset, but I learned to deal with you being taken. I want to be by your side through the ups and downs. I love you, JJ". Spence said with such love, but a little bit of fear. "Did I say too much", Spencer thinks in his head.
JJ stepped a little closer to Spencer. She puts a hand on his cheek. They look at each other with such love.
"Kiss me, Spence."
Spencer takes her face into his hands and puts the softest kiss on her lips. They put their foreheads against each others.
"Wow. That's what I've wanted for almost 20 years. I don't want to mess this up."
"Spence..you won't mess it up. That kiss was amazing".
JJ pulls him to her again. The kiss is a little more heated, but the amount of love is still there. They break apart and both laugh a little.
"Wow! That was amazing!". It was JJ's turn to be surprised by Spence's kissing skills.
"Thank you for being here for me, Spence."
"Of course, JJ. I'm always here for you."