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The rain hammered down outside, a steady, muffled rhythm against the roof. Emily watched the droplets bead against the glass window of the front door. They slowly dripped down only to collide and clump into each other. Awfully dreary weather. Fitting for an awfully dreary mood.
"I don't want to go," Emily whined. She sat on the last step of the staircase with her school bag resting beside her, both looking equally worn out. Alongside the staircase was Grace, who was sifting through the coat closet for Emily's raincoat.
Grace poked her head back from the door briefly to acknowledge Emily. "Aw, why not?"
Grace missed the sharp shrug of Emily's shoulders. She struggled to articulate the ravel of anxious thoughts in her head. At first Emily was excited to start school—it was all she had talked about for weeks—but now that her first day of fourth grade had arrived, the uncertainty drowned out the excitement.
"Everyone will think I'm weird," she finally answered, just as Grace shut the closet door and returned with a coat draped over her arm.
"Oh, Emily. That's not true," Grace said. She crouched down to be level with Emily and swept her hair out of her face, dove eyes meeting Grace's reluctantly. She would need to trim Emily's bangs again soon, but that was neither here nor there currently. "Why do you think that?"
Emily stared at her as if that was a dumb question. Perhaps it was. Grace only wanted to understand her daughter's fears, so she remained crouched and gave Emily a few moments longer to think. Emily's eyes drifted off to the side, her own expression warping into something like frustration.
"I don't know. I've– The only friend I ever had was Marie," she said softly after a gap of rain-filled silence. She fidgeted with the strap of her bag, fingers running along the stitched seams.
Grace's carefully manicured expression faltered for the briefest of seconds. She cleared her throat and set the raincoat on a step just behind Emily. "I see… Well, what did you and Marie have in common?"
"Not a lot. She played with her dolls. I liked reading mostly."
Grace smiled and took Emily's hands into hers, thumbs rubbing over Emily's knuckles. "See?" She asked, "You two were pretty different, but you were still friends, right?"
Emily visibly couldn't tell where Grace was headed with the question, but she nodded regardless and squeezed Grace's hands. "Yes."
"You can be different or weird and still have people like you. And people who just want to be mean are…?"
"Bullies."
Grace nodded, her smile widening into a grin. "Exactly, and we don't listen to what bullies think, right?"
"Right," Emily answered, though she let out a defeated sigh afterwards.
Grace left Emily to her thoughts, trusting her to say what was on her mind when she figured it out. In the meantime, Grace grabbed the raincoat again, nudging Emily's arms to have her slip them into the sleeves. Grace closed the inner zipper, then carefully fastened each outer button with a satisfying snap.
The bright yellow coat was admittedly a bit too large for Emily, but Grace was certain that she'd grow into it… Maybe in a year or two. Regardless, it would keep her dry with the recent streak of downpours. Grace chewed the inside of her cheek as she sat back on her heels. The juxtaposition of the yellow raincoat and Emily's sad expression tugged at Grace's heart.
She took Emily's hands in hers again, bringing one up to press a kiss to her knuckles. "Hey, it's going to be alright, Emily. You're going to make so many friends at school, and if anyone is mean to you, then you tell me, okay?"
Emily nodded hesitantly, then with more conviction. She retracted her hands in order to wrap Grace in a hug, which Grace reciprocated easily. She cradled Emily's head with one hand, stroking her hair gently, and rubbed circles over her back with the other.
"Hey, I have an idea," Grace whispered. A smile bloomed across her face, the kind that happened subconsciously when she was about to say something that would make Emily light up.
Emily pulled back to study Grace's expression as if it would reveal everything to her, eyes flicking left to right and right to left in a square. When she concluded her inspection and gained no insight, she tilted her head and asked, "What?"
"If you make it through your first day, we'll go to the bookstore, and you can pick out a new book. And if you make it through your first week, you and I can go out for ice cream. How does that sound?"
Emily blinked once, then twice as she weighed the value of those exchanges. She hesitated for a moment, and then took a chance to ask, "Can I get two books?"
That earned a soft chuckle from Grace. She could have asked for an entire library, and Grace would have worked tirelessly to make it happen. For now though, two books was certainly doable. "You've got yourself a deal."
Emily cracked a smile at last. She pulled back from the hug to grab her bag, adjusting the weight on her shoulders before standing up from the stairs. They still had time to kill, but Grace didn't want to leave room for more second guessing, so she fetched two umbrellas from the stand beside the front door. She ushered Emily outside, paused beneath the porch long enough to lock up, and then opened the larger umbrella to guide Emily to the car.
"Maybe I'm making the wrong choice. She was learning fine at home, but… She seemed so lonely," Grace vented into the phone. She was supposed to be finishing up a report—had several papers left at the printer on the other side of the office—but she couldn't stop dwelling on Emily. "I haven't received a call from any of her teachers, but maybe—"
"Grace," came Leon's gruff voice into the phone, "Go easy on yourself. You made the right call; she's a tough kid. You remind me of Claire worrying to death over Sherry."
Grace peered over her shoulder and tapped one key on her keyboard only to backspace the same number of times. She had to make herself look busy. "I know she is, but I've never done this before. My mom and I moved around so much that I don't even remember what elementary school was like."
"Then give yourself grace."
"You're ri—" Grace started before cutting herself off with a groan. "Is that supposed to be a pun?"
"Maybe," Leon said. There was a gap of dead air, then a rustling of papers, and finally Leon cleared his throat. "Well, break time is over for me. Try not to worry, alright? She'll call you if she needs you."
"Yeah." It didn't sound convincing, but not worrying wasn't exactly one of Grace's specialties. Still, she appreciated Leon's advice. "Yeah, yeah. Thanks, Leon. Give Sherry and Claire my best."
"Will do, kid. Talk to you soon."
The line went dead after that, Grace still had her report to finish, and her anxiety was only half-quelled. She sighed and glossed over her notes about a localized incident in the Pacific Northwest, something with possible ties to The Connections. The incident didn't follow the usual blueprint for their operations, but after what happened at the ARK laboratory, Grace wouldn't be surprised if they changed course.
The day dragged on as Grace compiled relevant data and organized it into a timeline that made sense. Sort of. She would iron out the wrinkles as new information was presented to her. Units were still on the ground, after all. When she had enough in her report to call it an afternoon, she saved her file five times to be certain and closed out of it, pushing back her rolling chair with a huff.
Then she checked the clock. Only half past noon. Emily's pick-up wasn't for two more hours, and Grace slumped in her chair, knowing she wouldn't be able to think clearly until she saw her daughter again. She considered phoning the teacher herself just to check in, but that would be disruptive, so Grace restrained herself. Instead, she crammed her documents into their respective folders in the cabinet beneath her desk and walked across the office to knock on her boss's door.
"Mr. Dempsy?" She called, softly but loud enough to hear.
"Ms. Ashcroft, come in."
Grace opened the door to slip inside, shutting it behind her with a barely audible click. She smoothed her dress shirt and adjusted her blazer as she approached the desk. "I've made as much progress on the report as I can, at least for today. Unless the DSO units have reported back with anything else?"
She phrased the last part as a question, hoping for more work to distract her until 1:45 rolled around. Unfortunately, Mr. Dempsy only shook his head and offered Grace a thumbs up. "Nothing on my end. Good work, Grace."
"I see. Thank you, sir," Grace said, turning on her heel to exit the office.
She took her time as she gathered her things to clock out, even sifting through her bag and organizing it for nine, almost ten minutes. It still wasn't even 1 o'clock. The school was only twenty minutes away from her work, so if she left now, she'd arrive… At about 1:15, according to her wristwatch. That would leave her one hour and fifteen minutes to wait in the school's parking lot, which they likely wouldn't appreciate.
But if she drove slow and took the streets where she'd hit all the red lights…
Grace finally pulled into the school's parking lot at 2 o'clock sharp, which was the best she could manage with driving slow, stopping for coffee, and stopping for every yellow light. To say her stomach was in knots would be an understatement. What if Emily tried so hard to be brave, only to come out crying? What if Grace pushed her too far, too soon and made Emily hate school? What if the other kids ignored Emily, or otherwise made her feel like she didn't fit?
Grace drummed her fingers against the steering wheel and let the thoughts eat at her. At least the rain had stopped earlier in the day. She rolled her car windows down and listened to the birdsong come and go, a breeze rolling through the trees bordering the school. Each time she checked the car's digital clock, only five minutes had passed. Grace forced herself to close her eyes and think about anything else for the next ten minutes.
Only that made the time fly. Her eyes shot open when a bell began ringing, and in the following minutes, students began lining up outside accompanied by teachers. Grace exited her car and walked toward the front entrance, showing a slip of paper to one of the teachers before finding a pole to lean against. When Emily wasn't among the first out, Grace's anxiety returned. What if she was crying in the bathroom?
A few stressful minutes passed, but then Grace finally saw Emily trailing out of the building, two girls walking alongside her like they didn't want to part yet. Grace heaved a sigh of relief and smiled, pushing off her pole and waiting for Emily to notice her. The girls all waved goodbye, and then Emily scanned around for Grace. Her face lit up when she found Grace waiting with open arms.
Emily ran to jump into her arms, and Grace gave a pleased laugh as she squeezed Emily tight and headed back to the car. She set Emily down to open the door, then helped her inside and fastened her into her seat. Grace was surprised Emily contained her excitement for that long; the moment Grace sat in the driver's seat and buckled in herself, Emily sucked in a deep breath and began giving Grace a rundown of her day, hour by hour.
"—and she said she has a pet lizard. I didn't know you could have one of those as a pet."
Grace focused dutifully on the road, but she occasionally glanced in the rearview mirror at red lights to see the unabashed joy on her daughter's face. "A lizard, really? That's so cool!"
"I know! And the science teacher has a… I forgot what he called it, but it's furry and makes these sounds—" Emily imitated what sounded like squealing, which stumped Grace for a few minutes.
"Oh, a guinea pig?" She asked finally.
"Yeah, that's it!"
Grace's smile was pinned to her ears by now, all the past anxiety having melted away. "It sounds like you had a lot of fun at school today. I hope you saved some excitement for the bookstore."
"I forgot about that," Emily said, sounding surprised that she couldforget. She went silent for a second, and Grace flicked her eyes over to find her looking contemplative. "Can I get a book for my friends?"
"Asking for three books now, are we?" Grace mused.
"No, just two. I have some books at home I haven't started yet."
A geyser of emotion rushed up inside Grace. Emily was a source of endless kindness, selfless without anyone's input needed. Grace sniffled quietly and swallowed back the tension in her throat. "That very kind of you, Emily. Of course we can."
Grace would still let her pick out three books, because she knew Emily was only being polite about it all. She had plenty of unread books at home, but that never stopped her from adding more to her collection, each book more ambitious than the last. When Grace parked the car in the bookstore's lot and killed the engine, Emily was already brimming with excitement.
She unbuckled Emily and set her gently on the ground, extending her hand for Emily to take. "Come on," she said, guiding Emily to the store's front door, "Let's see what you pick out this time."