A Complicated Heart- A Game Changers: Role Model Sequel Fanfic

by TchrLdy0902

Summary:

Harris and Troy are madly in love, and Troy's been on the road for over a week. When he returns, he discovers Harris hasn't been feeling well. Harris says he's fine, but is he really? Troy isn't so sure, and all he knows is he needs Harris.
Read on to see how these lovers navigate a difficult situation!

                  Troy Barrett was the happiest man on the entire fucking planet, or at least he believed he must be, because how else was he supposed to feel when this was his life? He was an out and proud gay hockey player in the NHL! He had the most beautiful apple-farmer boyfriend who he was absolutely crazy about and they lived together in a gorgeous two-story home on the river with their two dogs, Chiron, their lab mix and the Ottawa Centaurs’ team dog, and a one year old Boxer named Styx. His team was the best group of guys he could ever imagine playing hockey with and his coach was a wonderful and respectful BISEXUAL man! How much more perfect could Troy’s life get?

This is what he was contemplating as he got off the plane and onto the bus that would take the team back to the arena, and more importantly, take Troy back to Harris, who would be working in the office when they returned. The Centaurs were just getting back from a very successful, but LONG, road trip through the Midwest in which they played 8 games in 12 days and won 7 of them, and Troy was about to go absolutely crazy if he didn’t get his hands on Harris soon. A lot of the guys were getting pretty punchy because this had been such a long trip. All except Shane and Ilya who were adorably cuddled together, their rings glinting off their left hands. Troy looked across the aisle of the bus and Ilya caught his gaze, winking back at Troy. They’d talked a lot about how incredibly happy Ilya felt having Shane on the team, and Troy was grateful to be Ilya and Shane’s friend. Sometimes he was a little jealous that they got to bring their husband on the road, but every once in a while so did he. Not his husband, but… hopefully, one day, Harris would hold that title. Maybe one day soon even.

He and Harris had Facetimed a lot and texted and called, but almost two weeks without Harris’s touch or kiss and Troy was a parched man in a desert who could see an oasis.

The drive only took about half an hour, and when he got inside, he dropped his dufflebag outside the locker room and made a beeline for Harris’s office, loosening his tie on the way.

- - -   

                  Harris smiled tiredly as he played the highlight reel he had put together from the best moments of this road trip the team was returning from today. The boys had done very well, especially his incredible boyfriend who had not only scored many of the goals in these games, but had smiled his real, honest-to-goodness smile into cameras several times, winking after those goals, which Harris had come to know was something Troy did just for him. Over the last week, seeing those videos was especially helpful as Harris had felt like absolute garbage for much of the past several days. At the very moment that Harris posted the completed video and closed his laptop, the door to his office swung open, and Troy was leaning against the doorframe in a navy suit with a light gray shirt and silver tie, his suit jacket open and his tie loose around his neck. Harris could feel literal tension leave his tired body as he stared into Troy’s insanely blue eyes, even with every bit of heat and promise of something Harris was very on board with for later simmering in his gaze. Harris got up as Troy stepped into the office, and they met in a tight, desperate embrace. Harris wrapped his arms around Troy’s neck and Troy’s locked around Harris’s back as Harris buried his face into Troy’s chest.

                  Troy chuckled lightly and turned his head to bring his lips to Harris’s ear, “Miss me?”

                  Harris inhaled Troy’s spicy clean scent as he nodded against his shoulder. “Yes,” he whined a little, turning so his face was almost touching Troy’s. “Kiss me.”

                  “Gladly,” Troy whispered, closing the minimal space between them and kissing Harris. It was warm and gentle and sent shivers down to Harris’s toes before Troy pulled away just enough to ask, “Can you leave?”

                  “Yep, I made sure. Just let me grab my bag.” Harris stepped away, putting his laptop into his messenger bag. As he put on his coat and swung the bag over his head, he coughed a little and seemed to brace on the chair for support.

                  “You good?” Troy asked, stepping closer, putting a hand on Harris’s back.

                  Harris nodded, “Yeah, I had a little bit of a cold last week, but it’s pretty much gone.”

                  “Okay,” he nodded, but Harris could hear the worry in his voice.

                  In truth, once most of the congestion had cleared a few days ago, Harris had still been feeling pretty out of sorts, sometimes a little lightheaded and weak, but he had always had a little more difficulty kicking your run-of-the-mill cold than others due to his heart issues, so this wasn’t entirely unexpected. He had taken a couple days off last week to rest and recover, and felt almost back to normal, but the cough itself wouldn’t seem to go away. If it lasted too much longer, Harris would call his doctor, but for now he was sure he’d be fine. He just really wanted to get home and do all sorts of dirty things with Troy.

- - -

                  Troy was a little concerned by Harris’s cough as they walked hand-in-hand out of the arena. Over the year or so they’d been together, Harris had been completely healthy and had even stopped being self-conscious about his scar around Troy, at least at home. He would lounge around sometimes in just sweats or shorts and Troy loved just casually being able to see him in his own domain being relaxed, playing with the dogs, feeling confident and comfortable. Troy actually loved being able to see the evidence on Harris’s skin of how strong, brave, and resilient Harris was and it made Troy swell with love for him all the more for it.

                  On the day the team had left, Troy had ridden with Harris to the arena, so he didn’t have his own car to drive home today. Troy plucked the keys of Harris’s truck out of his hand before tossing his duffle bag in the back.

                  “And just what do you think you’re doing there, bud?” Harris asked with a laugh.

                  “Driving my amazing boyfriend home,” Troy said simply with a smile.

                  Harris shook his head as Troy hit the unlock button and opened the passenger side door for him. Troy stole a kiss as he passed him to get into the truck.

                  When they got home and inside, Troy dropped his duffle by the door and he and Harris hung up their coats in the entryway as the dogs came to greet them both. They had a very cool set up with a doggy door out to a large enclosure in the back yard and an automatic feeder on a timer. Harris and Troy toed off their shoes and moved out of the entryway so Troy could give the boys pets and love as Harris watched, leaning against the wall. When he stood up, Harris’s gaze was filled with so much love and tenderness, he couldn’t help but to go to him and lean in to press his lips to Harris’s in a searing kiss as he gripped his hips tightly. Harris gasped and sank into Troy as he always did, moaning a little into Troy’s mouth.

                  Troy pulled back, with some difficulty and took Harris’s hand. “Come on, let’s go upstairs,” he said huskily.

                  Harris smiled and flushed deeply as he pulled on Troy’s hand, leading them up the stairs to their bedroom. At the top of the stairs, Harris coughed a little, like the stairs had winded him, and Troy pulled on his hand gently, getting him to turn around and crowded him up against the wall in the hallway. “Hey, are you sure you’re okay?” Troy searched Harris’s face, moving his hand up to cup his cheek and brushing his thumb along Harris’s cheek bone under the slightly dark circles under his eyes, trying to find any other visible signs that Harris wasn’t feeling well, but found only those, which could always be attributed to Harris working too hard, as usual.

                  “I am, if it sticks around for much longer, I’m definitely going to call the doctor,” Harris assured him optimistically. “But I feel better than I did last week.” Harris cast his eyes down and to the side, biting his lip.

                  Troy turned Harris’s face back toward his own gently. “How bad did you feel last week, Harris?” Concern took over almost every lust-filled part of Troy’s brain. “Why didn’t you say anything?” He thought back to when he’d talked to Harris on the phone a couple of days ago. Had he sounded congested? His service had been shit in the airport and Harris had been difficult to hear and unwilling to videochat on wifi.

                  Harris’s eyes narrowed and his chin jutted out a little, but he didn’t try to step away. “I didn’t want you distracted on the road. It was just a cold. People get colds, Troy.” He sounded annoyed, like he thought Troy was overreacting.

                  Troy’s lips pressed into a thin line. “Harris, I know you know how to take care of yourself, and I know you’re careful, but I also hate you keeping things from me. Let me manage how distracted I am, okay? Just be honest with me,” he pleaded, pressing their foreheads together. “We can deal with whatever together, as long as we’re together about whatever it is, yeah?” Troy pled with his eyes for Harris to understand. He didn’t ever want to keep Harris from his autonomy or independence, but Harris was his partner and the person he wanted to spend his life with and so Troy took the privilege of being his partner and having concern for him very seriously.

                  Harris sighed heavily and kissed Troy gently. “Okay. I’m sorry. I just didn’t want you to worry… I stayed home a couple of days and binge watched The Great British Baking Show and rested. I genuinely felt most of the way better before I went back to work, I promise.”

                  Troy smiled as he imagined Harris, red nosed, cuddled in a blanket, lying on the couch watching TV, a pile of tissues on the coffee table. It was an adorable image. “Is that why you couldn’t video chat the other day?” Troy asked with a smirk.

                  “Yes,” Harris admitted, seeming a little embarrassed.

                  Troy shook his head and kissed Harris again. “I would have loved to see your face, no matter how you felt. It’s my favorite face in the world. We could have comfort watched together,” he smiled and nuzzled his nose against Harris’s before taking his hand and walking with him into the bedroom. “You were probably so cute all cuddled up on the couch.” Troy chuckled.

                  “I was absolutely NOT cute. I was snotty and felt disgusting.” Harris shook his head as he sat on the bed. “So, dear, what were you thinkin’?” he asked as he propped himself up with his arms behind him on the bed, his bulge very apparent in his jeans as he lifted his eyebrows a couple of times at Troy with a sultry smile.

                  Troy licked his lips, the heat returning to his belly and his face as he raked his eyes over Harris’s body head to toe. “Clothes off,” he commanded, beginning to shuck his own suit quickly. Harris smiled widely and pulled his shirt off. In just a few moments they were both undressed, and Troy went to Harris, leaning down to capture his mouth in a kiss and pressing Harris down onto the bed. As their bodies pressed together, their erections pressed against one another’s stomachs. Harris lifted his hips slightly and gasped as Troy groaned into their kiss as their dicks rubbed against each other. “God, I missed you so much,” Troy growled as he trailed kisses down Harris’s jaw and neck.

                  “Me too, Troy, so fucking much,” Harris breathed, winding his fingers into Troy’s hair.

                  Troy kissed his way down Harris’s chest, pausing to bite at his nipples, which he knew Harris loved. Harris gasped and moaned, wriggling under Troy. Troy licked and kissed his way down Harris’s scar reverently, nuzzling his nose in Harris’s chest hair around the scar as Harris’s hand pressed down urging Troy toward his dick. Troy looked up and his lips quirked up in a smile at the impatience in Harris’s eyes. “I’m goin’, I’m goin,” he grumbled playfully as he meandered further south, continuing to nuzzle and lick and kiss his way downward.

 - - -

                  Troy was really trying to drive Harris out of his mind. They’d been apart for almost two weeks and he sure was taking his fucking time with him. Usually, Harris might not have had a problem with this, but with all of the emotional talk and Troy’s concern for Harris, he really just wanted to get back to the fun sexy part and away from his busted heart. As Troy continued his way down Harris’s stomach and finally, FINALLY wrapped his warm lips around Harris’s cock, Harris’s head fell back, and he moaned loudly.

                  “Yes, Troy, thank fuck,” he babbled, his fingers still lost in Troy’s long dark locks, not tightly, just holding on as Troy began to suck him in earnest. “Oh my god, yes.” Troy’s tongue teased the tip and Harris gasped; afraid he’d come far too soon. He pulled a little on Troy’s hair so he’d pull off and guided him back to his mouth. “Don’t wanna come yet.” He kissed Troy sloppily as he slid a hand down wrapping it around him. As Troy’s velvety skin slid under his palm and Troy moaned into his mouth, Troy moved a hand to touch Harris as well. As they stroked and touched and kissed, working each other up, Troy moved his hand down and began to finger Harris’s entrance.

                  “Can I?” Troy asked, pulling away to look at Harris. His fingers gently circling, not pressing.

                  Harris bit his lip and nodded. “Absolutely.”

                  Troy grinned and leaned over to the nightstand to grab the lube and a condom while Harris rearranged himself fully onto the bed in the middle against the pillows (sans the stuffed animals, though there was one rainbow shaped pillow in the middle) instead of across it. He got comfy and Troy set the condom and lube next to him, his fingers already shimmering with lube as he returned to Harris, covering him with his body and pushing one leg up which allowed him to press two slick fingers into Harris and begin to prepare him as he moved in for a deep kiss, his tongue stroking against Harris’s in time with his fingers. Harris’s hands roamed over Troy’s back and shoulders which drove him absolutely wild, so he added another finger. In short order, Harris was gasping and moaning and ready for more.

“Please, Troy” he whined. “I need you. Don’t be gentle.”

                  Troy nipped at Harris’s ear and neck and whispered, “I know what you need. I’ve got you.”

                  Troy readied himself with the condom and more lube. “Turn over,” he instructed, and Harris did, hugging a pillow and shoving his ass up in the air, so ready for Troy to take him over the edge.

Troy grabbed his hip in one hand and guided himself to Harris’s entrance with the other. Harris clutched the pillow tightly and groaned as Troy pushed in fluidly until his hips pressed against Harris’s ass cheeks. Harris sighed in relief to finally be fully of Troy again. Troy leaned down, breathing raggedly, but pressing light kisses up Harris’s spine. “You ready?”

“Yes, Troy, please move” he begged, and Troy did. Troy slid away and slammed back in over and over and over, nailing Harris’s prostate with every stroke. “Oh, holy fuck, Troy, my god, holy shit.”

Troy held onto his hip with one hand and Harris’s shoulder with the other to give him maximum control and leverage, and it did not take long at all for Harris’s orgasm to build and his moans to get higher and higher pitched. Harris reached for himself and stroked in time with Troy’s thrusts.  

“Come on, so good Harris, I’m so close, too. Come with me,” Troy growled, and in just another couple of strokes, Harris cried out and as Troy thrust into him through the waves, he also stilled and groaned loudly as Harris clutched him around his orgasm.

Troy caught himself on the bed with his elbows on either side of Harris, his lips leaving a trail of kisses across his shoulders and down his spine as he gently pulled out. Harris loved this part. Not that any part wasn’t amazing, but the way Troy took care of him after using his body so thoroughly, just like Harris begged him to, was possibly even more sexy than Troy giving him exactly what he wanted. As Troy got up and threw away the condom, Harris rolled over out of the mess he’d made beneath him and got up as well. He took a deep breath and decided he felt okay before he walked to Troy and slid his arms around him from behind, pressing a kiss to his well-defined back. “I love you”, he murmured against his skin.

Troy turned in his arms and took Harris’s face in his hands. “I love you, too, so much.” He kissed Harris, deep and slow, locking his fingers together behind him. “Shower?” he asked when he pulled away.

Harris nodded and they walked together to the ensuite bathroom that had a large glass-enclosed, double-headed shower with far too many buttons and features, but was absolute heaven, especially when they were in here together. A bench ran across the back wall and there was a large rainfall shower head in the middle of the ceiling. Troy started fiddling with the controls and getting it warm, but not too warm, and Harris sat on the bench, coughing away the tickle in his throat and feeling the sweet soreness of their previous activities. Once the shower was going, Troy came to Harris and pulled him up. “Let’s get you cleaned up, sir” Troy said with a smirk.

- - -

                  Troy loved the feel of a soft, wet Harris in his arms. He loved this feeling after sex when they cleaned up together, and he got to take good care of Harris’s body as well as his emotions. He ran his fingers through the fuzzy hair on Harris’s chest and kissed him gently. Harris looked a little sleepy and definitely lustful, but Troy knew they both needed rest. Troy used the apple scented shampoo from the shelf built into the wall and lathered it into Harris’s hair as Harris peppered his chest with kisses and made encouraging sounds about his head massage. They washed each other, both becoming aroused again in the process and then Harris pulled Troy over and sat down on the bench in front of him. “You sure? You don’t have to…” Troy began to protest, knowing how tired Harris looked.

                  “I want to,” Harris insisted looking up with determination and desire. “I’ve wanted to ever since you left. I miss you so fucking much when you’re gone.” Harris’s desperation cracked Troy’s heart open. He fucking hated leaving him.

                  Troy bent down to kiss Harris, gently sliding their tongues together as he threaded his fingers into Harris’s hair. “I missed you too, I never sleep well on the road when you’re not there…”

                  “Me either, so…?”

                  Troy sighed happily, his dick getting with the program of what Harris was suggesting. “If you insist.”

                  Harris grinned and pulled Troy in by the backs of his thighs, his cock sinking into the wet heat of Harris’s mouth. Troy braced himself on the shower wall groaning as Harris did, objectively, some of his very best work while also stroking himself. It did not take long as Harris kept it shallow and flicked his tongue against Troy’s slit before Troy was warning Harris and spilling into his mouth and coming again on his own stomach. He swallowed him down and then wiped his mouth and kissed his lower abs before standing up. Harris wobbled a little and Troy grabbed him around the waist tightly so that he stabilized. His face had gone flush, and his eyes were unfocused.

                  “Definitely time to get out,” Troy said firmly, fear gripping his chest. He had him rinse off under the now-tepid water, then guided Harris out of the shower and had him sit on the bench they kept outside of the shower while he grabbed them towels. Harris closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the wall.  Troy wrapped his own towel around his waist and put one across Harris’s shoulders, rubbing his arms to speed the drying process. He slid a hand up and rested it against his neck, covertly feeling his pulse flutter. It seemed fast. “You okay?” he asked. Troy tried to keep the fear out of his voice, but Harris was really starting to worry him.

                  Harris blinked, lifting his head up and looked at him with a sleepy smile. “Yeah, just too long in the shower, I think.”

                  “Okay, let’s get you dry and in bed.” Troy and Harris worked together getting them both dry and then headed back into the bedroom. Harris seemed better, more stable, but Troy was still worried.

They got into briefs and Troy switched out the comforter, throwing the other in the laundry before they climbed into bed, Troy holding Harris who was koala-wrapped around him with his head on Troy’s shoulder. Troy held him tightly, rubbed his back, and kissed the top of Harris’s head. Harris turned his head and kissed Troy’s chest murmuring, “Love you.”

“Love you,” Troy said into Harris’s hair.

Once Harris had fallen asleep against him, Troy reached for his phone without disturbing him and googled the symptoms of a failing heart valve. He began to panic a little as he saw symptoms such as “fatigue, shortness of breath, and dizziness” among others.

Troy knew those could be symptoms of any number of things, but given Harris’s situation, he was much quicker to worry even though he knew Harris hated it. He wasn’t always thinking about Harris’s heart condition, but now it was at the front of his mind. Troy opened a text to Harris’s sister Anna and typed.

Troy: When should I start worrying if I think Harris’s heart might have a problem?

Anna: What’s going on? she wrote back immediately.

Troy: He was sick last week, but said he felt better. Now, he’s dizzy, tired, still coughing… I don’t know how not to overreact except that I’m not calling an ambulance right now…

Anna: Okay, can you feel his pulse?

Troy rested a light hand against Harris’s neck and felt the ‘thump, thump, thump’ of his pulse. He counted beats and even asleep, his heartrate was at almost 100 bpm.

Troy: It’s too fast. 100bpm and he’s sleeping.

Anna: Shit. Here’s the info for his cardiologist. He gave the family his personal number, so you can text him. He’ll have better advice, but please let us know what he says.

Troy: You got it.

                  Anna sent a contact file and Troy immediately added it to his phone and started a text message.

                  Troy: Hi Dr. Ahmadi, this is Troy Barrett, I’m Harris Drover’s boyfriend. I might be overreacting, but I’d rather hear that from you than be right and say nothing.

            Troy explained the situation as he had to Anna and included his high heartrate, then waited with bated breath for a reply, feeling Harris’s chest rise and fall in his sleep against Troy’s side, taking comfort from the solid proof that, for now, he was okay.

                  About 10 minutes later, Troy got a reply that sent his own heart into his throat.

                  Dr. Ahmadi: Hi Troy, thank you for reaching out, it does sound like there could be something more serious going on. I’d like to see Harris as soon as possible. I can meet you at my office at the hospital at 7am tomorrow.

            Troy: Absolutely, he’ll be there. Thank you.

            Dr. Ahmadi: Of course. If his heartrate increases dramatically or he has more trouble breathing, such that his lips go blue, call 911 and let me know you’re going to the ER.

            Troy: Got it.

            Troy knew Harris was going to be pissed, but at least he’d be healthy and pissed, and even more, he’d be alive to be pissed. He texted Anna that he was taking Harris to the doctor first thing in the morning and she responded with thumbs up and heart emojis. Troy was also extremely grateful for the next couple of off days after such a long road trip, it was Sunday, and their next practice wasn’t until Wednesday. Troy put his phone back on the nightstand and secured his grip tightly around Harris, pulling up the blanket to cover them both.

- - -  

                  When Harris woke up later that evening, it was dark out and Troy was holding him tightly. He blinked and wiggled getting Troy to loosen his hold and that woke him up as well.

“Hey, you good?” Troy asked sleepily.

“Yes, just being boa-constricted to death by my boyfriend,” Harris joked on a cough.

“Sorry,” Troy said sheepishly as he loosened his grip, his hands rubbing Harris’s back and arm. “Hey, I have to tell you something…”

Harris looked up into Troy’s eyes and saw so much worry there. “What’s up?”

Troy closed his eyes and took a deep breath and said, “I got your doctor’s information from Anna and I texted him. He said he can see you at 7am tomorrow. He’s also concerned…” Troy’s eyes opened, and he seemed to be bracing for Harris’s reaction.

Harris’s eyebrows shot up and then knitted together in frustration and confusion, “You made me a doctor’s appointment?”

“You could barely get up the stairs and you almost fainted in the shower, Harris. You’re scaring the shit out of me…” Troy explained desperately, but Harris could hear the plea in his voice, and it took most of the steam out of his anger.

Harris moved to sit up, not leaving, but getting a bit of space and sitting cross-legged next to Troy, so Troy sat up also, resting against the pillows, giving Harris a moment. Harris closed his eyes and did a bit of a self-evaluation. If Troy was this concerned, even if it pissed him off, the least he could do was acknowledge that there was a reason for it. Troy was not one to freak out unnecessarily and he’d never been overly protective of Harris. Harris took a deep breath, which inspired a cough. Not hacking, but persistent, same as he’d dealt with for a couple of days now. Troy’s hand went to Harris’s knee, but he didn’t say anything. Harris rolled his head around and almost immediately felt dizzy, so he stopped mid-rotation. He did feel really tired, like he thought he’d just still been run down, but it was a pretty bone deep tired that he wasn’t shaking off. Overall, he felt mostly like shit, and that was frustrating, but it wasn’t Troy’s fault, and he didn’t fault him for being concerned like he didn’t fault Anna or the rest of the family for being concerned. Honestly, he probably should have called his doctor a few days ago.

                  “Are you angry with me?” Troy asked quietly.

                  “I’m… frustrated… and feel betrayed by my own body, again…” Harris sighed and opened his eyes, turning so he was facing Troy. He took hold of Troy’s hand and twined their fingers together. “But not at you.” He lifted Troy’s hand to his lips and kissed it. Troy followed, moving closer, taking Harris’s face in his hand and resting his forehead against Harris’s. “I can’t stand that my having a cold inspires so much concern from everyone in my life. Like, I get it, but also I can’t even just get a cold and get over it without a whole to-do about my overall health. That’s so fucking frustrating,” Harris vented, feeling helpless.

                  “I know, love, I know it is. But hear me out, I’d rather take you to the doctor in the morning than have to call an ambulance in a couple of days because we didn’t do anything…” Troy offered, brushing his thumb against Harris’s cheek comfortingly.

                  Harris’s eyes filled with tears as he remembered the times, and there had been several, that he’d had to be taken from the farm by ambulance or rushed into the ER in his parents’ SUV, his mom in the back making sure he was staying awake and alert, which he sometimes was not...

                  “I hate this, I hate being afraid of my own body, that it’s just going to give out on me one day…” Harris began to sob, tears spilling down his face.

                  Troy tugged on his arms and pulled Harris to him so that he was straddling Troy’s legs and he held him tightly. “I know you do,” Troy said, and Harris could hear the tears in Troy’s voice, too. Harris buried his face into Troy’s neck and held onto him for dear life.  “I hate it for you, Harris,” Troy continued. “When you first told me about your heart defect, I was stunned that a person who loved so big and so loud and so fiercely could have anything wrong with their heart. It seemed completely impossible. You thought I was looking at your scars because they were ugly, but they were beautiful to me because they showed me that I am in love with a man who is strong, resilient, and powerful if he can get through everything that caused those scars.”

                  So much emotion filled their embrace, and, while Harris was absolutely wracked with fear and frustration, he also marveled at how much this moment was helping, at how much it meant to him having Troy to vent to and lean on. Usually, he’d vent to Anna or maybe Mom, but they couldn’t exactly offer the full body calming that Troy did. He really did find himself a man that could do both: absolutely rail him into a mattress as well as offer him sensitivity and comfort and emotional intelligence. Troy was like a mythical creature, but he was completely real and completely loved Harris and Harris completely loved him.

 - - -

                  Troy held Harris as, after a while, his crying quieted and his breathing returned to normal, thank God, and he finally sat up and pressed a kiss to Troy’s mouth, tears on both their faces mingling together.

“Thank you for caring enough to get the information. You’re right, I probably would have tried to wait it out and made it worse…” Harris admitted, looking down in shame.

                  “Hey,” Troy tilted his chin up so Harris would meet his eyes. “You are everything to me, Harris. I don’t just want to take care of you in bed, though that’s wonderful.” They laughed wetly together. “I want to take care of you in every way. One day, in the not especially distant future, though this is not a proposal, I’m planning to marry you. Stubbornness, busted heart, and all.” Harris looked at him with so much love it about made Troy start crying all over again.

                  “You really want to marry me?” Harris asked on a whisper. He couldn’t fucking believe his luck.

                  Troy smiled shyly, “Well, if I can help it, I’m never letting you go, so, yes. I’d love nothing more than to be your husband, in sickness and in health. You’re it for me, Harris.”

                  Harris kissed him soundly and then kissed his cheek and his neck and shoulder as he wrapped his arms tightly around Troy’s neck. “I love you, Troy. Whenever you ask, it’s going to be a yes. I can’t imagine a better life than the one we’re building.”

                  Troy kissed his neck and shoulder and said, “Me either.” He sighed happily, still concerned, but glad they had a plan, and that Harris had been able to vent some of his frustrations. He rubbed Harris’s back and asked, “Are you hungry?”

                  Harris huffed a laugh against Troy’s neck and pulled back. “Kind of, I haven’t had much of an appetite with how I’ve been feeling, but I should eat.”

                  Troy considered that as he ran his hands up Harris’s arms and began gently massaging his shoulders. They were very tense. “Does anything sound good at all?”

                  Harris twisted his mouth as he thought and finally said, “Maybe an omelet? I know it’s not breakfast time, but…”

                  Troy shushed him with a finger on his mouth and shook his head. “If that’s what sounds good, that’s what you’re getting. Come on, let me make you breakfast for dinner.”

He patted Harris’s leg and Harris climbed off of him and stood, still a little unstable, but Troy hadn’t actually lost contact with him, so he steadied him without saying anything. Troy grabbed himself a pair of pajama pants and offered Harris his own which they both put on. Troy put on a Centaurs t-shirt, but Harris reached into his larger drawer and pulled out his newest bright red Ottawa hoodie and pulled it on.

“Are you cold?” Troy asked, sliding his arms around his waist and into the front hoodie pocket, meeting his eyes in the vanity mirror, looking specifically at his lips. Were they kiss bruised? Were they blue? Had his dark circles darkened? Troy couldn’t tell and it scared the shit out of him.

“Just a little, also this is new and fuzzy and cozy,” Harris explained, resting his arms on Troy’s and smiling gently at him in the mirror.

“It is cozy,” Troy agreed and kissed Harris behind the ear. “Come on.”

- - -

They headed downstairs and Harris sat at their countertop bar while Troy cooked. Chiron and Styx had taken up residence in their beds just outside the kitchen and were watching with mild interest for whether they might get some of the food Troy was making.  He loved just watching how Troy moved around. He was beautiful and confident and effortlessly graceful. His dark hair hung over his forehead and into his blue eyes which darted to look at Harris every few minutes. He was trying and failing to be discreet, and Harris shook his head. Troy was very good about not treating him like a medical miracle all of the time, which he appreciated because he couldn’t necessarily say that  about his parents, so in this instance, Harris decided, begrudgingly, that Troy could have some grace.

When the food was ready, Troy asked, “Want to eat in here or in the living room with a movie?”

“Movie sounds good,” Harris answered. Then he could get under a blanket, since he was still a little chilled. He took a deep breath and moved off the bar-height chair, using it as leverage to make sure he was steady before he headed into the living room.

Troy carried their plates into the living room and Harris grabbed the soft sherpa blanket off the back of the couch, draping it over his legs and lifting one side so that Troy could join him under it. Once they were settled in, Harris scrolled and chose a comedy he knew they both enjoyed. He wasn’t in the mood for something new and he was pretty sure he was going to fall back asleep after he ate. Harris was able to eat about 2/3 of the omelet before he had to put it back on the coffee table.

“Sorry, I’m just not hungry…” he apologized as he cuddled into Troy who had finished all of his food a bit ago.

Troy pulled him in close and kissed his forehead. “Nothing to be sorry about, love.” He pulled a throw pillow from the other side of the couch and put it in his lap. “Here, lay down.” Harris adjusted so that he was essentially in the fetal position with his head in Troy’s lap. Under the blanket, with the hoodie, and with Troy’s large muscular arm lying along his side, intertwining their fingers together as Troy’s other hand gently massaged Harris’s scalp, he finally began to feel warm again. He still felt like he was working a little too hard to get a deep breath and he could hear his rapid heartbeat in his ears. He really hoped against hope that this was something he could deal with by taking a round of strong antibiotics and wouldn’t involve a hospital stay and especially not another fucking surgery.

He must have drifted off because he was awoken by Troy pressing kisses behind his ear and rubbing his arm. “Hey, let’s go upstairs.”

 - - -

                  Throughout the night, Troy slept maybe an hour or so at a time, waking up and gently checking Harris’s pulse and listening to how he was breathing. He didn’t seem to get any worse, but Troy was terrified he’d wake up and find Harris not breathing. At about 5:30, when Troy was trying to check on him again, Harris rolled over and his eyes fluttered open.

                  “Hey,” he said sleepily. “Whatchya doin’?”

                  Troy guiltily said, “Checking on you…”

                  Harris’s brows knit together as he woke up more fully. He saw the bags under Troy’s eyes and how exhausted he looked. “Troy, did you get any sleep?”

                  “I got a few hours…” Troy said truthfully. “Kept having nightmares… you don’t need to know about those…” He pressed a kiss to Harris’s forehead, sighing in relief that he didn’t seem to be feeling any worse this morning.  

                  Harris kissed Troy’s chest before sitting up, pulling his knees up to his chest.

                  “I’m sorry I’m scaring you,” Harris whispered, resting his head on one knee.

                  Troy sat up wrapping his arms around Harris from behind as he brought his lips to his ear. “I am scared because I love you and I can’t imagine my life without you, Harris. You don’t need to apologize for something you can’t help. This is not your fault.”

                  “I know,” Harris said thickly, “but I hate that I’m burdening you with this. My heart is always going to be in the back of our minds, hovering over any plans or choices we make. My family didn’t have a choice but to be saddled with my heart problems. You do, and I don’t know why you’d choose to build a life with someone who can’t even get a common cold without it being a life-or-death situation…”

                  Troy moved in front of Harris and took his face in his hands, holding it firmly, but not roughly. “Harris Drover, you are my favorite human being in the world, do you hear me? You are not and will never be a burden to me. I consider it the greatest privilege of my life to love you, take care of you, and worry about you.” Troy’s voice caught, his eyes filled with tears, and his lip began to wobble, while Harris had tears streaming down his cheeks that Troy attempted to clear with gentle brushes of his thumbs.  “Everything you’ve been through has made you the man that I love and I would not change anything about you, Harris. Not your scars, not your heart, nothing.” Troy pulled Harris close and pressed kisses to his forehead and cheek as Harris held tightly to Troy. They were a tangle of limbs and blankets as they held onto one another and Harris cried out his frustration and emotion.

                  “Troy,” Harris cried into Troy’s neck, “I’m scared…”

                  “I know, Harris, and I’m right here, and your family will be here and the team. We’ve all got you no matter what comes of this. You are not alone, love. Not ever.” Tears streamed down Troy’s own face as he held Harris and felt him calm some. Troy had seen Harris be emotional before, but he couldn’t imagine an entire child and young adulthood of being poked and prodded from the day he was born and having had multiple surgeries all just to get another 10 – 12 years which is the average lifespan of an artificial heart valve. He knew it was heavy and difficult for Harris, and all he wanted to do was help him carry it and lighten the burden he felt about it.

                  Troy pulled back, holding Harris’s face more gently, preciously, and clearing tears from his cheeks. Harris reached up and used the back of a finger to do the same for Troy. “Come on,” Troy said. “Let’s get ready so that we can find out what we’re actually dealing with, okay? And just in case, I know we don’t want to manifest it, but let’s both pack a go bag, and if we don’t need it, fine, but if we do, we’re ready for whatever comes. Yeah?”

                  Harris nodded. “Not a bad idea.”

                  Troy moved in and kissed Harris, slow and deep and long. When he pulled away, he hugged Harris tightly and murmured, “I love you” into his ear.

                  “I love you,” Harris whispered with a sniffle.

                  They got up, Troy ensuring Harris was steady, and made their way to the bathroom to handle all of the business in there and collect their toiletries, then they moved into their closet, a large walk-in situation they shared with a side for each of them. They packed bags of comfy clothes and devices with chargers, and Troy grabbed Mr. Neck-Neck and shoved him into Harris’s bag. “Can’t forget your lucky charm,” he said with a smile as Harris looked at him with so much love.

                  “Think I might have a new one now,” Harris said, stepping into Troy’s space and covering the giraffe’s eyes to kiss Troy.

                  Troy carried their bags downstairs, and he left Harris to put on his shoes, as he filled water bottles for both of them, and grabbed a couple of protein bars. When he returned, Harris was sitting on the foyer bench with his eyes closed and his head resting back on the wall and Troy just stared at him for a moment. He was pale, the hollows of his cheeks and area under his eyes a little dark, and his breathing was sort of shallow. As much as he knew Harris would hate it, he was probably not coming home tonight, but Troy would be there the entire time, no matter what.

                  Troy sat next to Harris and immediately Harris laid his head on Troy’s shoulder. Troy pressed a kiss to the top of his head. “You ready?”

                  “No, but yes…” he acquiesced.

                  Troy wound his fingers through Harris’s and pressed a couple of kisses to the back of it, then stood and lifted him up also.

                  The drive was about half an hour to the other side of Ottawa and Troy kept a hand on Harris the whole time. In his hand, on his leg, on the back of his neck, just some sort of contact. They listened to Fabian Salah’s newest album while he drove, which was soothing and ethereal.

 

They arrived at the hospital with most of the morning shift of hospital workers, and Harris led the way to his doctor’s office, his hand gripping Troy’s tightly the whole way there. He was terrified, but grateful for Troy’s presence. He was being amazing when Harris knew he was scared shitless, too.

When the nurse put them in a room and said the doctor would be right in, Harris lifted Troy’s hand that he hadn’t let go of to his lips and pressed a couple of kisses to it, looking at Troy with love and so much gratefulness. “I’m glad you’re with me, Troy… I hate that I have to be here, but I’m glad I’m not alone…”

Troy’s lips tipped up on one side and he leaned in and kissed Harris lightly. “Nowhere else I’d rather be.”

His doctor came in then, shook both of their hands, and had Harris sit on the exam table. He did all of the general exam things, asked about symptoms and timelines, and looked down Harris’s throat and felt his lymph nodes and listened to his heart and lungs, and then had his nurse draw quite a collection of vials of blood for a list of tests he rattled off.

“I’m gonna put a rush on this bloodwork, Harris, so give us about half an hour. If I had to hazard a guess at this point, I’d say your body and heart are working overtime to get over a virus, but if it’s more serious than that, we’ll figure it out. Hang tight, okay?”

Harris nodded and slumped back in the chair next to Troy laying his head on his shoulder and winding their fingers together, holding on tightly. Troy began gently caressing Harris’s arm as a question came to him. “Do you think it might help to talk about some of the time you’ve spent in hospitals? I try to avoid the topic because I know you hate it, but I would really like to know what it’s been like for you…” Troy offered.

Harris huffed a mirthless laugh and considered for a moment, then said, “It might help…”

Troy squeezed his hand, a little awed by the relief he felt that Harris was finally willing to talk about it. In the year plus they’d been together, he had gently brought up his health and time in the hospital, especially when they were getting ready to go visit kids in the pediatric ward, but Harris always deflected and said it was in the past and he was fine now, then usually distracted Troy with sex. Troy guessed that knowing he might not actually be fine right now had loosened something in him, but even in the midst of the worry and fear, Troy would always be grateful to get to know Harris even better. He loved finding out new quirks and stories, even things that pissed Harris off, so to finally hear about a time in his life that was obviously so significant felt like an especially precious gift to Troy.

“I know the earliest surgeries were when you were a baby, but what’s the earliest time you remember being here?” Troy asked, resting his cheek against the top of Harris’s head. Harris shivered a little and Troy shifted so he had an arm around him and offered his other free hand for Harris to thread his fingers through.

Once he got settled against Troy again, he began speaking. “My very earliest memories are of being in the hospital. I was maybe four and a half or five, right before I started kindergarten, and I was supposed to have an MRI just to get new imaging, and it was the first time they’d tried to use contrast dye and I had a really bad anaphylactic reaction to it, so I was really sick for a couple of days and was strictly eating cherry popsicles.”

“Cherry? Not blue raspberry?” Troy asked with a chuckle.

“Absolutely not, Cherry is obviously the superior flavor,” Harris let out a small giggle and Troy’s heart soared.

“Anyways,” Harris continued sassily, and Troy smiled. “Then I came back at seven for about a week. They replaced the initial valve they had placed when I was three. That was planned pretty far ahead so I was prepared for it, didn’t get quite so freaked out. The same sort of situation happened around 15 so I wasn’t really scared, but I was pretty pissed because I was the manager of the hockey team and it was the middle of the season. Everyone on the team was really supportive, but I was very unhappy that it had to happen then and then I was out for the rest of the season because there were some… complications.” Harris seemed to tense and then sighed.

“What happened?” Troy asked into the quiet of the room, fearing for what Harris was about to say.

“They lost me on the table for about a minute and a half,” Harris said. It hung in the air and Troy’s breath hitched in his chest at how very close he was to never having met Harris. Who would he be? What would this have been like if he didn’t have Harris in Ottawa? He couldn’t fathom it.

Troy turned his face to kiss the top of Harris’s head and was able to get in a breath full of Harris’s clean appley scent and whispered, “That must have been so scary…” Troy held Harris a little more tightly to him.

“Honestly, I was sedated, I have only memories of waking up and being told that the rest of my heart had sustained a little damage and I’d need to stay in the hospital for a while. I completely lost it as much as a kid with a fresh open-heart scar can lose it, which is not much, but once my stitches came out, I actually had a pretty good time. All the nurses knew me and my sisters came to visit almost every day and we had the run of the peds floor, so as much as I hated being out of school, it didn’t completely suck being here. And then the last time, I was only here for about a week, and the guy I was dating was … impatient … broke up with me via text after the surgery,” Harris finished on a humorless laugh.

A growl broke loose from Troy’s chest and he said, “God, how low can a person get? I wish it had been me with you and then you wouldn’t have been abandoned and I wouldn’t have been being an absolute douche nozzle to Ryan or Wyatt or Ilya…” Troy tensed, remembering how much of an asshat he had been, especially to Ryan. God, he regretted that time in his life so much… He remembered Ryan telling Dallas he was gay and while outwardly he’d kept pretty neutral, inwardly, he’d been so jealous of him for just being able to fucking say it so plainly.

“You think so?” Harris asked, lifting his head up to look at Troy. No judgement, just open curiosity on his face.

Troy nodded and said, “I don’t say this enough, but as much as I am so incredibly grateful for and love Wyatt and Ilya and the team, you’re the reason I ever started to believe that I could maybe deserve any bit of sunshine or joy. The way you were so open and welcoming to me was irresistable to my connection-starved soul. I couldn’t stay away, and I still can’t now that I’ve found you.” He took Harris’s face in one hand. “I think maybe if I had found you earlier, I could have been braver and never been the asshole that was a dick to people and friends with Kent. Either way, once I got here and away from all that, it was you that saved me from my own fear and self-loathing, Harris. No two ways about it.”

Harris swallowed and put a hand on Troy’s knee. “You changed my life, too, Troy. I know I had the whole, pride pins, confident and flamboyant thing going, but you saw how I was about my scars, how I drowned myself in work. There were a lot of times I felt, in whatever way, like I was too much… but you’ve never made me feel that way,” he shared tearfully. “Thank you for accepting me as I am, for not trying to quiet or minimize me… even though sometimes I might try to do it to myself, I know I can be me with you and that you won’t be overwhelmed or put off by who I am.”

“I would never, I love who you are. It took a little while for my brain to realize I was really drawn to your entire vibe and not annoyed by it, but I had a lot of Dallas and my dad to purge from my mind, which you helped with immensely,” Troy assured him with a gentle smile as he leaned in and the kissed short and sweet.

“I love you, too, exactly as you are,” Harris said, cradling Troy’s hand against his own face.

At that moment, the doctor came back into the room rolling a machine with several leads and sat on the rolling stool. Both men cleared the tears from their cheeks and straightened up in their chairs.

 

                  As Doctor Ahmadi rolled in the EKG machine, Harris sat up and tensed. His doctor who had been working on his heart for his entire life sat on the stool and looked… mildly concerned, which is better than Harris thought he might look.

                  “So?” Harris asked.

                  “Well, your white count is up, which makes sense since you had a cold and could have a secondary infection, but your BNP is also slightly elevated, which could be not a big deal or could mean a big deal is coming, so we should do an EKG to measure your heart function and see what we see. If your heart is working way too hard, we’ll keep you for a day or two for IV antibiotics and observation.” Harris sighed and Dr. Ahmadi gave him a sympathetic look. “But if not, a prescription and the strong recommendation to rest at home for a little while. So, let’s see what we’re dealing with, shall we?” He stood and patted the exam table as Harris scrubbed a hand over his face and through his hair.

                  Troy squeezed his hand reassuringly and rubbed his back. Harris looked at him with a small tight smile as he loosened their hands and began to pull off his hoodie and t-shirt. He gave them to Troy who held them close to his chest and then laid down on the table. Dr. Ahmadi placed the pads that Harris knew were going to be a bitch to get off later given his general hairiness. Leads were placed on both wrists, ankles and shoulders, as well as either side of his sternum and a few under his left pectoral muscle. He turned on the machine and it began printing. Dr. Ahmadi let the machine run for a bit and observed the waves. Harris tried to stay still, so he looked at Troy who met his gaze with a reassuring smile. Harris tried to smile back, but it probably looked more scared than anything. Troy mouthed, “I love you” at him and Harris took a deep breath and began to feel genuinely calmer.

                  Dr. Ahmadi stopped the machine and pulled the paper off, considering as he looked at the length of it and then began to take the leads and pads off of Harris. “Alright, so the T-waves for both sides are a little more extended than I’d like. I hate to say it, bud, but I want to keep you at least overnight to push some antibiotics and see if we can’t kick whatever the ick is out of your system, ok?” Harris sighed and nodded, wincing a little at each removed electrode. “If by tomorrow you’re feeling better and a new EKG looks a little better, you can go home with a prescription. This is mostly out of an abundance of caution. I’ve worked very hard on your heart, and I’d like my masterpiece to remain pristine.”

                  “I can stay with him, right?” Troy asked, but with a little of his defenseman intimidation in his tone that showed he wasn’t really asking.

                  “Yeah, that shouldn’t be any problem. I’ll count on you to make sure he actually gets some rest, I know how stubborn he can be,” he said fondly patting Harris’s leg after taking off the last of the electrodes.

                  “You got it,” Troy chuckled.

                  “I’ll have the nurse come in once I submit the orders and admission forms and she’ll transfer you over to the in-patient wing on the other end of the hall. It should be just a little bit.”

                  Harris sat up and said, “Okay, thanks, Doc.”

                  When he rolled the EKG machine out and shut the door, Troy stood and moved in front of him, placing his hands on Harris’s shoulders, rubbing gently with his thumbs. “How ya doin’?”

                  Harris sighed heavily and looked up into Troy’s bright blue eyes. “I’m ok, disappointed, but okay.”

                  “Disappointed about an entire uninterrupted day with me?” Troy feigned offense with a smirk.

                  “Oh honey, you’ve never spent time in a hospital, it’s not uninterrupted at all. I will be poked for the IV, checked on every 2 hours no matter what time it is. They’ll ask how I’m doing, if I’ve gone to the bathroom, how I ate, how I’m sleeping even if they woke me up, it’s a whole to-do,” Harris vented and plunked his head against Troy’s chest. “But I’m glad you’re here… that you can stay… that it’s very conveniently a couple of off days for the team. Selfishly, I’ll take that over you having to travel or whatever while I deal with this…”

                  “Same,” Troy said, quietly, kissing the crown of Harris’s head and scratching his scalp a little.

                  “Mmmmm,” Harris groaned. “Don’t do that, too good.”

                  Troy chuckled as he stopped moving his fingers. “Sorry, love. You wanna put your shirt back on before I do something else I shouldn’t?”

                  Harris huffed a laugh and coughed, then said, “Okay, big guy, we are in a hospital, I can’t be that sexy while I feel all gross and it’s all chemically sanitized in here.” He took his shirt from Troy and put his arms into it.

                  “You are vastly underestimating my attraction to you, Harris.” Harris met his eyes that smoldered, and his own dick swelled a little.

                  “Well, now you need to stop being so sexy, sir,” Harris told him matter-of-factly as he finished putting the shirt on and took the hoodie from Troy. Once he had it on, he stood and wrapped his arms around Troy tightly.

Troy returned his embrace, resting his head on top of Harris’s. This was Harris’s favorite place in the world. He loved the sex, loved the family time, loved the farm and their home and their pups, but just being in Troy’s arms made wherever he was feel like home, because Troy was his home now. He used this moment to evaluate himself. Harris still felt sort of weak, a little generally bleh. He hadn’t been coughing quite as much this morning but he also hadn’t done much, though there was still a bit of a dry tickle when he breathed, he was still pretty tired but maybe wasn’t as out of breath as he had been the day before when going up or down the stairs.

                  Harris looked up and asked, “Do I still look pale to you?”

                  Troy considered, looking over his face, running a thumb under one of his eyes, and thoughtfully said, “A little, you have darkish circles under your eyes, you’re not rosy at all like I’m used to…” Troy leaned in and gave him a quick kiss and leaned his forehead against Harris’s. “How are you feeling?”

                  “Just sort of generally gross, weak, tired. Not any worse than yesterday, mostly the same.”

                  “Not worse is good. I’m glad what we did didn’t make you feel any worse, I was so worried after the shower that we shouldn’t have…” Troy’s eyes looked sad for having felt that way.

                  Harris shook his head. “No, it was amazing, even though I wasn’t feeling 100%. I’d never regret time spent making love to you.” They shared a smile and a sweet kiss and then the door opened, and a nurse took them to Harris’s in-patient room.

- - -   

                  When they got to the room and the nurse started setting up the monitors and getting his hospital bracelet ready, Harris turned to Troy and asked, “Hey, you wanna go get our stuff? This part is boring, and I’d really like my hospital hoodie that has extra zippered openings for IVs and whatnot that’s in my bag.”

                  “Of course. Would you like to call your parents, or would you like me to?” Troy posed, knowing it would be an inevitably tough phone call for whoever made it.

                  Harris sighed big at that and coughed. “God, I should, they’ll need to hear that I’m gonna be okay from me and that they shouldn’t come unless you call them to tell them I’ve gotten any worse…” He rubbed a hand over his face.

                  Troy brushed a thumb over his knuckles. “Okay, do you want to wait until I get back to do that so I can be your back up? Help convince them?”

                  Harris chuckled and nodded, “We can certainly try, though I think Mom was already on high alert. She’s been checking in daily since she brought over chicken soup and apple fritters when I was off work last week.”

                  “Okay, do you want anyone on the team to know? Or know yet? I’d like to maybe at least tell Ilya and Shane so they can either go get the boys or bring Anya over. Maybe Wyatt?” This wasn’t a natural instinct to Troy, as he still wasn’t quite used to having best friends who, ya know, gave a shit about anyone at all, but knowing Ilya especially, he’d be pretty pissed if Troy didn’t let him know and do what he could to help.

                  Harris looked up with a small close-lipped smile, knowing the same about Troy’s teammates. “Yeah, that’d be good to get the boys some company and for at least a few people to know…” The in case anything goes horribly wrong in the next 24 hours was heavily implied. Honestly, the whole team loved Harris, so they’d all probably freak out to some degree once they were told he’d been in the hospital, but for now at least just their inner circle was probably best. “I’ll also put in for the days off on my app and message our media manager and Gen.”

                  “Okay, I’ll be back in like five minutes. Do you need anything that’s not already in the car? I can stop in the giftshop,” Troy offered.

                  The nurse interrupted then, “If you’re leaving the cardiac floor you’ll need this, so no one questions you on your way back up.” She handed Troy a lanyard with a bright red Cardiac Family tag and RFID chip.

                  “Thank you.” She nodded and went back to her prep.

                  Harris considered Troy’s question and said, “Yeah, actually, if I remember these antibiotics at all, they make my mouth taste really gross. Can you grab some Lifesavers or Werther’s? They usually help.”

                  “You got it. Love you,” he said, pulling Harris in by the neck for a few quick kisses on his lips and one on his forehead. “Be right back.”

                  As Troy walked away from Harris’s room (412, he noted as he walked out) he began shaking the tension out of his arms and doing some arms stretches and head rolls to get some of the tension out of his back, shoulders, and neck. His whole body had been tensed all morning through all of the testing and making sure Harris was going to be okay. Troy was exhausted, but he had to keep it together for a bit and then he and Harris could both rest as the meds did their work. Troy headed to the lobby first and stopped in the giftshop for candy, getting both Werther’s Original and a roll of Lifesavers hard candies. He also grabbed himself some Sour Patch Kids and Twizzlers, having found an affinity for the chewy candy while going to the movies with Harris and the team. He also grabbed himself a Winter Edition Red Bull which he drank as he walked. Then he headed back to the parking lot and called Ilya as he walked out of the front doors of the lobby.

                  Ilya answered on the third ring. “Hello?” He sounded a little out of breath and Troy cringed.

                  “Hey man, I’m sorry to bug you on our day off. You’re probably busy with Shane,” he said knowingly.

                  Ilya chuckled a little but said, “We were, but is okay. What’s up, Barrett?”

                  Troy breathed deep and blew out a big sigh. “Harris is in the hospital.”

                  Before Troy could say anything else, Ilya was asking, “He is okay? What happened? I’m putting you on speaker.”

                  Troy’s heart squeezed as he felt Ilya’s concern for him and Harris in his voice. “He is okay, but they want to keep him overnight for observation. He’s got an infection as a side-effect of a cold he had last week. With his heart, they just want to be extra cautious,” Troy explained as he reached his royal blue Lexus SUV.

                  Ilya hummed his agreement and Shane piped up, “Do you guys need anything?”

                  “Actually, yeah, if you don’t mind, would you be able to either take Anya and hang at our place for a while later today with the boys, or could you go pick them up and bring them back to your house? They’re saying he should only need to be here overnight, but we don’t want them left alone that long. If you guys are busy, we understand, but you were our first call.”

                  Shane laughed. “You should see Ilya’s face right now.”

                  “Of course, we will go get the best boys Chiron and Styx!” Ilya exclaimed. “I have missed them!”

“We’ll bring them here, but we can bring them back tomorrow whenever you need us to,” Shane supplied.

“Awesome, thanks guys. You’re the best. They’ve missed you, too, Cap” Troy smiled, marveling a little at how amazing it felt to be able to call friends and that they’d just be there, for whatever he or Harris needed.

“Thank you for calling, Troy. We are happy to help. Send Harris our love and facetime us later if you want to see the boys. We’ll go get them soon,” Ilya said.

“Sounds good, talk to you guys later.”

They hung up the phone and Troy sighed. One down, one to go. He grabbed their bags putting one over his shoulder and holding one by the handles in the same hand that held the bag of candy. He locked his car and began walking back into the hospital making sure his red Cardiac Family tag was showing. He knew it was not a big deal, but being given something that made it clear he was Harris’s family was a very cool feeling, even though they were at the hospital. As he walked, he called Wyatt. After several rings, he picked up groggily.

“Hey Troy, what’s up?” he asked, sleep evident in his voice.

“Hey Hazey, sorry to wake you on our day off man,” he said sympathetically.

“No worries, everything okay?” he asked, sounding more awake.

“Well, no but it should be soon. Harris is in the hospital. He’s okay, but he had a cold last week and still wasn’t feeling well, so they want to push some meds and keep him overnight. We just wanted you to know.”

“Shit, man, that’s rough. Thanks for letting me know.”

“Yeah, man, we’re not telling the whole team right now, but wanted to clue in the inner circle, you know…” Troy said vaguely.

“Mmhmm,” Wyatt seemed to pick up what Troy was putting down. “Well, I’m honored, first of all, to be part of that, and second, if you guys need anything let me know. I can either get you the hook up from Lisa, she’s working today, or I’m not doing anything today so if you need food or whatever since hospital food is shit, I got ya covered.”

As he walked back through the automatic doors at the entrance to the hospital, his throat was tight with emotion. He coughed it away and said, “Thanks Wyatt, we’ll let you know.”

“Okay, talk to you later, man.”

“Later.”

Troy hung up and slid his phone in his pocket where it almost immediately buzzed. He pulled it back out and it was a text from Anna.

Anna: Any updates?

Troy: Yeah, he’ll be okay, but we’ll call you in a few.

She sent back a thumbs up emoji just before Troy got back to Harris’s room.

- - -  

                  When Troy headed out, Harris sat down on the bed and blew out a long sigh ending in a cough.

                  Jamie, the nurse who he had met the last time he’d had surgery sat on the rolling stool next to the bed after setting up the IV tray and patted his leg.

                  “So, I know what I’ve seen in the news, but I’d love to hear it from the source, how the hell did you bag Troy Barrett?” she asked with a smile. She was Hispanic with dark brown hair and dark eyes and she loved her chismè. 

                  Harris rolled his eyes but smiled as he scooted back on the bed sitting crisscross applesauce. “Honestly, I would never say it like that. He was kind of a mess when he got traded here, but I could tell he was looking to be better than his reputation and I just… left room for that to be possible. I think a lot of people might have just expected him to be a dick because that’s what he was known for, but with that Kent situation, I knew there had to be more there. Turns out, he was everything I never knew I needed.” Harris wound his own fingers together in his lap looking down with what he assumed was a ridiculous goofy grin.

“Awww, Harris, that’s so romantic. So much better than that dickhead you were seeing a few years ago. And what he did last year, coming out before the pride game? So brave…” she commented.

“It was, he is…” Harris agreed.

She smiled at him knowingly. “Alright friend, hoodie and t-shirt off. I’ll let you keep your sweatpants on, but you know where IVs go and Doc’s gonna do another EKG tomorrow.”

Harris pulled off his hoodie and t-shirt and held out his arm for Jamie. She started his IV in one try with quick practiced hands and smooth motions then covered the line with Tegaderm to keep it in place and connected it to the IV saline that hung from the rolling pole by his bed. The cool fluid beginning to move through his veins was uncomfortable, but the sensation normalized quickly as it made its circuit through his bloodstream. As Jamie hung the second bag with IV antibiotics in it and connected them to the line for the fluids, she said, “Might sting a little when they get started, you know the drill. Also, here, make sure you fill out your lunch and dinner orders.” She handed him the pamphlet for daily meals from the cafeteria.  

Harris nodded and winced a little as he felt the antibiotics making their way into his IV. He took the pen she offered and completed his meal orders, getting things he knew Troy would also like knowing he wouldn’t be super hungry himself. He sighed. “I really hoped to avoid this for a good long while still…” he told her.

“I know, bud, but I gotta tell you, I see the common cold and the flu take more of our heart patients than anything because they didn’t come see us soon enough. Doc told me that it was Troy who contacted him because he was worried, yeah?” she confirmed.

“Yeah, I’d probably have given it a few more days…” Harris shared honestly.

Jamie patted his hand. “You’re lucky to have him, Harris. I’ve seen situations like this go from bad to worse in no time flat just out of pure stubbornness and us not having enough time to do anything. As it is, we’ve caught this ick pretty early and Doc seems really confident that you can kick it with a little help. A couple more days, or a week could have meant a longer stay, a more severe infection, or even having to replace the valve entirely.”

Harris fought an onslaught of emotion to keep from crying AGAIN… He nodded, twisting his mouth to keep his lips from wobbling. He took a deep ragged breath and blew it out.

“You’re gonna be okay, bud. We’ll make sure of it, and so will he,” she said smiling as she turned, and they both saw Troy come back in the room. “Let me know if you need anything. Just press the button.”

“Thanks Jamie,” he said thickly as she left with a wave.

Troy smiled at him as he set down Harris’s bag in front of him on the bed and the bag of candy on his tray, then his own bag on the bench under the window. He ran a hand through his hair and sat on the other side of Harris’s bag on the bed, pulling out Harris’s hoodie and handing it to him. When he saw what Harris assumed were his puffy red eyes, his brows knitted together in confusion.

“You okay? I was only gone like ten minutes.”

“Yeah,” Harris sniffled. “Jamie just said she’s seen situations get pretty out of hand because people are stubborn and don’t come in when they should. She said I’m lucky to have you. And because I’m me, and my emotions are already a shit show, it made me emotional again,” he chuckled, wiping at his watery eyes.

Troy traded places with Harris’s bag and moved in close, moving a hand up to rest against his neck, brushing his thumb slightly against his pulse point. He closed his eyes briefly, pausing his thumb against Harris’s pulse, and smiled serenely. When he opened his eyes, he softly said, “I’m the lucky one here, love.” He leaned in and kissed Harris gently.

“I’d argue an equal amount of luck on both our parts,” Harris countered, brushing his nose against Troy’s.

They smiled at each other for a moment and then Troy pulled back. “Anna texted. We gotta call your family. Do you wanna do like a group call? Get it all out at the same time?”

“Yeah, that’s probably best. You wanna get the sisters and I’ll get Mom and Dad?” Harris asked as he unzipped his many-zippered hoodie. There was a covered plastic zipper all the way up each arm and it zipped diagonally to allow for any and all tubes, wires, leads, etc.

“Yeah. You want some help with that?” Troy chuckled as he saw Harris trying to do the calculus in his head of how to get the hoodie on.

Harris looked at him a little helplessly. “Yes, please.” He’d unzipped the right arm and the front, but he simply wouldn’t have enough hands, especially with his IV, to be able to zip the arm up.

Troy got him arranged in the aqua hoodie and the zipper zipped carefully up to where his IV was and then said, “Scooch, we’ll put everyone on speaker.” Harris moved over and Troy climbed in next to him, stretching out his long legs, pulling out his phone, and pulling the blanket up over both of their legs. Harris moved back in closer, looping an arm through Troy’s and laying his head on his shoulder as he got his own phone out of his pocket and found his mom’s contact. Troy squeezed Harris’s arm with his own a little and leaned in making sure they were connected a much as they could be. Legs and hips touching, and arms tangled around each other.

As they gathered Harris’s family on speaker phone, explained the situation, assuaged their fears, and assured them that Troy would keep them updated if anything major happened, Harris was struck by how much the family trusted Troy to make sure he was okay. They didn’t have any doubts that he would have Harris’s best interest at heart and keep them in the loop. They weren’t arguing that they felt they needed to be there, though he was sure his parents wanted to be. Harris already knew all that was true, even if it had taken him some time to learn how not to push back on that, how to let Troy take care of him sometimes. He was so used to being independent, handling things on his own, it had taken several months of push and pull and conversation for Troy to understand Harris’s need to do certain things on his own, but also for Harris to allow for the possibility that he could be independent and still lean on Troy for support. Troy, too, had to get used to being able to be open and honest with Harris and knowing that his feelings were welcome and valid and would be acknowledged. They had grown so much over the past year and Harris knew, as much as him being admitted sucked, that it, too, would bring them closer together and make them stronger as a couple.

After they’d gotten his sisters off the phone, Harris’s dad said, “Troy, I just want you to know how grateful we are that Harris has you. We’re so glad you’re part of our family.”

Troy looked at Harris’s phone in awe and Harris nudged him a little with a smile. “Me too,” he said quietly.

“Okay dad, ya struck him speechless. Love you,” Harris said chuckling.

“Love to you both,” his mom said, and Harris could tell she was pretty choked up.

They hung up and Harris stretched a hand forward to rest on Troy’s leg. “How ya doin’?” he asked softly, brushing his thumb across the fabric of Troy’s pants just above his knee.

He huffed a little and dropped his head, so his hair fell in front of his closed eyes. “Part of the family… wow…” When he looked up and turned to Harris, his eyes sparkled with joy and tears, and his smile looked a little wobbly.

Harris couldn’t help but to bring him in with a hand on his face and kiss him softly. “I love you.” He whispered against Troy’s lips.

“I love you,” Troy whispered in return, pressing another soft kiss to Harris’s mouth and then his forehead, before wrapping an arm around Harris and pulling him close, careful of the lines and tubes.

Harris cuddled into Troy, suddenly realizing he was exhausted from all that had happened so far that morning. Troy lifted a hand into Harris’s hair and began to scratch and massage his scalp. Harris groaned and cuddled more fully against him. A new wave of antibiotics must have gone through his IV at that point because his arm burned, and he tensed against Troy for a moment until it subsided.

Troy rubbed Harris’s back and quietly asked, “You good?”

“Yeah, meds burn sometimes.” Harris relaxed back into Troy, so Troy continued his scalp massage.

“Is there anything else I can do to help?” Troy asked.

Harris shook his head no against Troy’s chest. “You’re doing it.”

- - -   

                  For a while, Troy and Harris dozed together until around 1pm, when an orderly came in with lunch. He quietly set it on the tray when Troy pointed to it and gave him a thumbs up. Troy gently ran his fingers over Harris’s back and shoulder as he pressed gentle kisses to his forehead and face until Harris’s eyes fluttered open.

                  “Hey,” Harris said with a sleepy smile.

                  “Hey, lunch is here. You hungry?” Troy asked.

                  Harris fluttered his eyes and rolled onto his back considering. “Kinda? I don’t know, I’m kinda nauseous actually.” He sat up slowly and hit the call button.

                  Troy rubbed his back as Harris took slow deep breaths. Harris took a Werther’s out of the package and popped it into his mouth.

Jamie came in and Harris asked her for some anti-nausea meds which she readily supplied. “Those antibiotics are rough on the stomach. Give that a few minutes to get working and then try to eat something, okay?”

                  “Yep, will do,” Harris agreed, lying back against the elevated head of the bed into Troy’s arms.

                  Eventually, Harris ended up eating about half the chicken and rice dish as well as some Jello and Apple Juice.

                  “That’s all I’ve got, bud. You can have the rest if you want.”

                  Troy finished off Harris’s lunch in no time and then cleared his tray off and pulled out his iPad setting it on the rolling tray. “Wanna watch something?”

                  As he asked, his phone buzzed in his pocket. When he looked at it, he had a message from Ilya with a picture of Chiron, Styx, and Anya all at Shane and Ilya’s house playing in the light dusting of snow in the back yard. He showed Harris.

                  “Aww, look at them, they’re all best friends!” Harris gushed. “That was a good call having them come get the boys. They wouldn’t have known what to do for so long without us there. I’m really glad we have friends like that.”

                  “Me, too,” Troy agreed, adding a heart tapback to the picture and sending a quick thank you text. “So, movie? Show?”

                  They settled on Schitt’s Creek since it was something they’d seen before and enjoyed a lot. Harris was awake for most of the afternoon, but still pretty lethargic, sometimes coughing up some gunk. Whenever Troy asked if he needed anything, he usually said no, but he did eat a few more Werther’s and a couple of Lifesavers. Troy was starting to get a little antsy around 4 in the afternoon given his typical day would have usually included a workout at the very least by this point. As an episode finished, Harris reached out to the iPad and paused before another could begin.

                  Troy looked at him and saw a bemused smile on Harris’s tired face. “Go take a lap or something, Troy, you’re going nuts just sitting here, I can feel it.” His eyes sparkled with amusement as Troy’s mouth dropped open.

                  “I am not! I’m just fidgety,” Troy defended himself half-heartedly. He looked up guiltily as Harris laughed. “Sorry…”

                  “You have nothing to be sorry for,” he squeezed Troy’s knee. “If I didn’t feel like shit, I’d also be crawling out of my skin with nothing to do. I’ll be okay for a little while if you need to go for a run or something.”

                  Troy looked at Harris. He looked tired still, a little pale, but overall, he hadn’t seemed to get any better or worse.

                  “How are you feeling?” he asked.

                  “About the same, glad the nausea’s gone, but I’ll get more meds this evening so it might come back. Still just pretty generally gross.” He coughed a little. “I’ll probably just doze or scroll while you’re gone. Seriously, it’s gonna be a long night if you’ve got all that pent up energy and don’t let it out.”

                  Troy sighed and rolled onto his side, propping himself up on an elbow. “Are you sure? I feel bad leaving…” he worried at his bottom lip.

                  Harris smiled gently and reached up to brush his hair out of his eyes. “Troy, I’m gonna be fine. You need to take care of you, too… You’ll be back,” he said the last part in a horrible imitation of Arnold Schwarzenegger.

                  Troy laughed and shook his head, dipping down to kiss Harris slowly. “Okay,” he said quietly as he pulled away. “Do you need anything? Want me to get non-hospital food for dinner?” Troy thought he might eat more if it was something he really wanted.

                  “Well, you kissed me like that and now I’ve got all sorts of cravings I can’t have,” Harris pouted playfully.

                  Troy was halfway hard, too, but he just batted his eyelashes innocently. “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” he smirked. “Seriously, though, I’d like you to have something you actually want, if you’d actually eat it, rather than whatever they’re serving.”

                  “Honestly…mom’s fritters sound pretty good, but those take forever, so maybe the soup from that place we like? The French onion?” Harris suggested.

                  “I can do that, and I have a friend in the PT department that will probably let me borrow a treadmill for a bit. Try to run off my ADHD jitters,” Troy chuckled.

                  “Awesome,” Harris agreed on a yawn. “I’ll be here when you get back.”

                  “Okay, need anything before I leave? Another pillow? Blanket?”

                  “Troy, I’m fine, I swear,” he groaned.

                  “Okay, okay. I’ll be back in a little while. Love you,” Troy pressed a kiss to Harris’s forehead.

                  Harris smiled sleepily. “I love you, too.”

                  Troy climbed out of the bed, put his shoes on, and grabbed a change of clothes he could work out in from his bag. On his way out, he paused at the end of the bed and looked at his sick, sleeping, beautiful boyfriend and his heart squeezed in his chest. He knew this wouldn’t be the last time he’d see Harris in a hospital bed, and that was fucking terrifying. However, he also knew that being here, supporting and caring for Harris, even though it wasn’t particularly fun or pleasant, was right where he was meant to be and he’d never choose to be anywhere else.

                  “I can feel you staring, Barrett,” Harris said, his eyes still closed, but a smile on his face.

                  Troy chuckled and sighed and then walked out. As he walked, he pulled out his phone and called Harris’s mom, Marlene.

                  “Troy? Is everything okay? How’s Harris?” she asked when she answered in less than one ring.

                  “Hey Marlene, he’s okay. No better so far, a little nauseous from the antibiotics, actually. That’s why I’m calling. He’s struggling to eat a whole lot of anything. He’s trying, but he said that one of the only things that sounded good was your apple fritters. He thought they’d take too long to make, so I’m gonna get the French onion soup he said he wanted, but I thought maybe you could have them at the house for him tomorrow?”

                  “Oh goodness, yes, actually I was so anxious after you boys called that I started making a big batch. I can bring them up there for him. We can be there in about an hour.”

                  “That’s amazing! He’s going to love that. Thank you, Marlene.”

                  “Of course, dear. See you soon.”

                  They hung up and Troy called Wyatt and asked if he could bring the French Onion soup for both of them from the local diner they loved along with a full entrée meal of a double grilled chicken sandwich with provolone and extra fries. Troy was starving and knew after his run it would be time a very bulky meal.

                  “Of course, man, that actually sounds delicious. I’ll get dinner for Lisa and I while I’m there. See you soon, man. Thanks for calling.” Wyatt sounded truly appreciative to have something to do to help.

He approached the PT floor as he hung up with Wyatt where he had done some sessions of rehab on a shoulder dislocation injury earlier in the season and, luckily, his own physical therapist, Lexie, was there.

                  “Troy! What’s up, you’re not injured again, are you?” Lexie asked.

                  Troy chuckled shyly and said, “No, I’m here with someone, my boyfriend is on the cardiac wing. He’s fine, but we’ll be here overnight.”

                  “Gettin’ a little anxious? Sitting still jitters?” Lexie asked, with a knowing smile.

                  “You got that right. Just gotta let out some tension, nerves, if that’s cool.”

                  “Absolutely, go for it.” She smiled and held out an arm ushering him into the PT room.

                  Troy changed and then hopped on the treadmill for a brutal 30-minute run on a pretty steep incline since it was the only workout he was going to get today. When Troy finished a five-minute cool down walk, he got a text from Wyatt that he was just leaving the diner. He went into the locker room and took a super-fast shower, so he wasn’t sweaty and gross when he got back to Harris, changing back into his track pants and t-shirt from earlier before heading to the lobby with a quick thanks to Lexie on his way out.

In the lobby, he popped into the giftshop and purchased himself an orange soda and a bottle of Harris’s favorite Strawberry Watermelon Sparkling Ice. He asked for an extra bag so he could stash his sweaty gym clothes and then met Wyatt in the lobby.

“Hey Hazey, thank you so much,” Troy said, meeting Wyatt in back slapping bro hug.

“Of course, man, how’s he doing?” he asked, keeping a hand on Troy’s shoulder as he pulled back.

“He’s nauseous, but not getting any worse, I just want to get a real meal into him. He’s so tired and weak… but he’s gonna be fine,” Troy said confidently. He pulled in and then exhaled a large breath.

Wyatt squeezed his shoulder and nodded. “Of course he is. He’s got this. You go, get back to him. Let me know if we can do anything else, okay?”

“Of course, thanks again, man.”

Wyatt handed off the bags of food and they said their goodbyes. Troy hurried back upstairs, and when he got to Harris’s room, his nurse, Jamie, was standing at the door looking inside.

“Jamie? Is he okay?” His anxiety kicked into high gear as soon as she turned and looked at him, concern plain on her face.

She met him with a hand on his arm. “His O2 sats dropped below where he like them, and he was coughing quite a bit. He’s got a cannula now, and his numbers look a lot better.”

“What does that mean? He was fine, why would they drop all of a sudden?” Troy asked in a panic, his own heart doing a ridiculous gymnastics act in his chest.

“It could mean some of the ick that’s been hanging out in his lungs is still trying to make its way out, that stuff doesn’t just dissolve. It could also mean there’s fluid buildup somewhere, Doc is doing an echo right now. It’s an ultrasound of his heart and lungs to see what’s going on,” Jamie explained.

He looked at her and she squeezed his arm. “I was only gone for an hour,” he whispered desperately.

“Hey, you didn’t do anything wrong, and you couldn’t have predicted or prevented this. This is why we kept him. This is why he’s here and not at home, so it’s not a hospital ride and a whole production to get him here, he’s here and we’ve got him. Okay? This is why you made sure he came here,” she reminded him, squeezing his arm reassuringly.

Troy tried to take a few steadying breaths. He knew he hadn’t schooled his face, he couldn’t, but he had to lay eyes on Harris on the other side of that curtain. Troy walked in and put the many bags he had down on the counter before the curtain and ran a hand through his hair nervously before walking around the curtain. As Jamie would have him expect, Harris had a tube in his nose connected to oxygen coming from the wall and his hoodie was unzipped and open as the doctor moved a wand around on his chest. Harris met Troy’s eyes and fear was evident in them as he was sure it was in his own. Troy went to him on the opposite side as the doctor taking his hand and pressing his lips to the back of it then holding it against his own heart.

Harris closed his eyes and squeezed Troy’s hand firmly. “How’s he doin’ doc?” Troy asked, his eyes not leaving Harris’s face which looked a bit rosier, probably from the oxygen.

Doctor Ahmadi smiled encouragingly at Troy and Harris both. “His heart looks good, pulse is still up a little high, and obviously his oxygen saturation was a little low. At its lowest, it hit about 90 which is borderline for low. We like to see above 95, so nothing too dangerous, but not a trend we want to see continue. He’s back up to 98 now. Your body’s working pretty hard, but that means it’s still fighting. We’ll keep you on 2 liters overnight and push your next round of antibiotics after you get some dinner in you, okay Harris?”

Harris sighed heavily. “Okay, sounds good. I think my man here brought the good stuff,” Harris smiled tiredly.

Troy reached out and brushed a thumb under Harris’s eye and down his cheek, nodding, the lump in his throat keeping him from speaking. Harris closed his eyes and leaned into the contact.

“Okay, Jamie will be back with it in about an hour or so, then. You’re doin’ great, bud. Keep it up.” Dr. Ahmadi patted Harris’s shoulder and then left with the echocardiogram machine.

Troy dropped into a squat, his elbows resting on the bed, his forehead against Harris’s hand still clasped in his own. “God, I shouldn’t have left, I’m so sorry, Harris…”

Harris untangled their hands and turned Troy’s face toward him by the chin. “Stop, Troy. You needed to go, and I’m okay. Come here,” he threaded his fingers into Troy’s shaggy hair and tugged lightly, encouraging Troy toward him.

Troy lifted up and sat on the side of the bed, leaning down to kiss Harris gently and rest their foreheads together, holding Harris around the neck where he could feel his pulse. “You’re okay…” Troy breathed.

“I’m okay,” Harris said more firmly. “And I’m actually hungry,” he sang a little. “I can smell my soup and whatever else you got.” Harris pressed another kiss to Troy’s mouth. Troy sighed into the kiss in relief and wrapped him carefully in a firm hug, breathing deeply, inhaling Harris’s sweet apple scent.  

He pulled away and got their food, getting everything set up as Harris’s hospital dinner arrived which looked much less appetizing. It was some sort of Salisbury steak and mashed potatoes with green beans. Very much like an old-school microwave dinner. If Troy was still hungry later, he might eat it, but for now, they set it over on the counter by the sink and filled Harris’s tray with delicious diner food. They sat cross-legged on either side of the table that hovered over the bed. When Harris took the first bite of the French Onion soup, which had an incredible cheese-pull, he moaned in a way that had Troy squirming and giggling.

“Damn, gonna need you to stop making those noises about that soup, love,” he grinned and waggled his eyebrows, squeezing Harris’s leg under the table. Harris laughed and blushed and his laugh was so beautiful to hear after such a scary moment.

Just as Harris was finishing his soup (because he did actually finish it) and stealing some of Troy’s fries which Troy happily parted with, they heard a “Yoohoo!” from outside and Harris’s mom and dad walked in carrying a couple of to-go containers.

- - -  

                  Harris gaped at his parents walking it with what could only be his mom’s fritters, and he looked at Troy confused.

                  Troy shrugged and said, “It’s what you wanted, and she’d already made them…” He blushed and smiled shyly as Harris’s parents wrapped them both in hugs.

                  “Yes, honey, Troy said you wanted fritters, and you know how I get when I get the nerves, so I’d been just baking up a storm all afternoon and was so relieved when Troy called. You know how we get when you’re in the hospital, dear,” she rambled, stacking the two containers on the table.

                  “Mom, I’m fine… you didn’t have to do all this…” Harris said pretty halfheartedly because those fritters smelled fucking delicious.

                  His mom’s eye’s filled with tears as she took him in, she took his hand gently in hers and rubbed her thumb across his knuckles, and he had to admit, it made him feel a little better. Troy was incredible and he’d done everything Harris could have even thought to ask for, but having his parents here, even for a bit, just calmed the little piece of Harris’s soul that was still at home on the farm with his family.

                  “Thank you,” he rasped around a lump in his throat, pulling her in to hug her around the waist as best he could with the tubes and wires. As he said it, though, he was also looking at Troy, and his eyes went all soft and he nodded, imperceptible to anyone else.

                  “It’s my pleasure, sweetie,” Mom whispered, kissing the top of his head.

                  “Okay, I have to eat some, they smell too good.” Harris laughed and wiped his eyes and everyone else wiped their eyes as they chuckled away the sentimental moment.

                  Harris’s dad went over and sat on the bench under the window and said, “Troy, you boys did a great job down south on your road trip. Hollander’s really fitting in nicely, it seems.”

                  Troy smiled. “Shane’s awesome, sometimes when he’s centering me and Ilya, it feels like we’re on a whole other plane, it just works so well, we barely even need to talk. It’s pretty wild to be a part of, so I imagine it must be incredible to watch.”

                  Troy had talked about this to Harris before and Harris did all he could to really play up the magic of those three in his social media posts. This season for the Centaurs had been incredible, largely in part due to their top line putting up epic numbers.  Especially when they played at home, he tried to get a lot of his own footage of the team anyways, but when those three were on a line, they had this thing they did when the three of them lined up, a ritual where Ilya tapped Shane’s skate, Shane tapped Troy’s and then Troy sent it back down to Ilya, and then they bent for the puck drop. He hadn’t quite caught the perfect shot of it yet, but it was his Roman Empire. That moment of connection and alignment before an absolutely mythical play was entirely golden.

                  Harris ate four or five of his mom’s apple fritters as his dad and Troy talked hockey and his mom sat in the chair just taking it all in. She caught his eye, and he smiled softly. She put her hand over her own heart and smiled back. They stayed for maybe half an hour and then, when Jamie came in with her night shift counterpart Alejandra, who was wearing a Centaurs Pride pin on her lanyard, to give him his next round of antibiotics and make sure the incoming nurse had all the necessary details, his parents each gave him a hug and quietly made their exit. While Jamie and Alejandra talked about Harris’s case and Jamie set up the next wave of antibiotics, Troy, noticing Harris was finished with the fritters for now, moved the boxes and the table and sat on the side of the bed, supporting himself on one arm over Harris’s legs, his other hand gently threading their fingers together, brushing his thumb against Harris’s. Harris had settled back against the pillows and had been looking at the nurses as they spoke, but turned to Troy and squeezed his hand gently.

                  “Alright Harris,” Jamie said, so Harris turned his attention back to her, as did Troy. “We got the next round of antibiotics set up and I gave you some Zofran to head off any nausea, but if you need a little more in a few hours, just let Alejandra know and she’s got it ready for you. Doc said he’d be by first thing in the morning to check in on you and do another echo and EKG and then he’ll have a better idea when he might be able to discharge you. Any questions, comments, concerns before I head out?”

                  “Nope, thanks ladies,” Harris said with a smile. He was tired but also full because he’d actually eaten a full meal for the first time in a few days and not because he was just aggressively unhungry. He was also very ready to be back in Troy’s arms.

                  When they left, Troy got up and motioned for Harris to scoot forward and Troy agilely slid his large body behind Harris, resting his legs on either side of him, and gently pulled Harris back against his chest. Troy maneuvered the blanket so it covered most of Harris and then brought his big hands up to Harris’s shoulders and began to massage them gently, as he laid light a light kiss to the crown of Harris’s head. Harris relaxed fully back into Troy, resting his arms on Troy’s legs and letting the massage ease away some of the tension.

                  Troy’s moved his lips to Harris’s ear and he asked, “How are you doing, Harris?”

                  Harris took a deep breath and released a long and happy hum of a sigh. “So much better. Still can’t believe you called them. That was just what I needed. Most I’ve eaten in almost a week.” 

                  “Good.” Troy nuzzled his nose lightly against Harris’s ear and pressed a kiss to the side of his head as he continued to massage Harris’s shoulders for a few moments, and then gently looped his arms under Harris’s around his waist.

Harris settled more comfortably against Troy, rolling a little onto his side, as best he could with the IV and O2 tubes, and wrapped a hand around Troy’s arm as if holding a pillow, turning his face and nuzzling against his bicep, pressing a kiss to his skin. “Thank you, Troy. Love you,” he whispered against Troy’s skin as they both dozed off.

 - - -

                  After a couple of hours, Alejandra came back in and offered Harris more Zofran which he accepted. Troy moved to lie next to him and Harris curled up against him. When Alejandra had left, Troy gently rubbed his hand over the length of Harris’s back and kissed his forehead.

                  “How’re ya feelin’?” he asked sleepily.

                  Harris wriggled his non-IV arm under Troy, getting even closer and sighed against his chest. “Okay. Sleepy. A little annoyed at the beeping, but it sounds slower doesn’t it?” he asked hopefully.

                  Troy looked up at the machine and saw that Harris’s O2 was staying high and his heartrate, which had been up around 100 was down to 84 and falling as he settled back in to try and go back to sleep. “It is. Definitely coming down.”

                  “Mmm, good.”

Harris turned his face up to Troy as his own moved back to the pillow and leaned in to kiss him. Harris’s hair was all goofy because he’d been sleeping all day and Troy was sure his own was a wonder to behold as well. They both had sleep/morning breath, but it didn’t matter, not to Troy, because Harris was still here and healthy and so fucking kissable it hurt. Troy kept it slow and light but dragged out the contact, needing a little more. When Harris pulled his lips from Troy’s, he held his face and kissed Harris’s nose, his cheeks, his eyelids, his temple. Harris sighed happily as Troy took his time. There were no filthy thoughts in this moment. Troy simply relished in the opportunity to be close to Harris, to touch him and hold him, and feel his heartbeat slowly beginning to match the steady rhythm of his own. Troy leaned his forehead against Harris’s, brushing their noses together, and whispered, “I love you.”

“I love you.”

Harris continued to cough off and on, but it was productive, and Harris was able to get a lot of grossness up and out throughout the night. Alejandra came back a few more times throughout the night checking in. She removed the empty bag of antibiotics and commented on Harris’s improving heartrate and O2. Around five in the morning, she gave Harris a menu to pick his meals for the day but said that Dr. Ahmadi would be in around 6 to do another EKG and Echo and decide whether Harris might be able to be discharged.

Both Troy and Harris were pretty wide awake after a day of sleeping and Harris absolutely looked like he felt better overall, so they sat up, inclining the bed almost all the way and watched some more Schitt’s Creek until they heard a knock on the door and Lisa Hayes popped her head in.

“Hey guys! How’s it going?” she asked brightly.

“Hey Lisa,” Harris said with a smile. “It’s good, it was definitely necessary, but I feel a lot better this morning.”

“Good, I’m glad to hear it and Wyatt will be, too. Hopefully you get discharged this morning.” She squeezed Harris’s shoulder and said her goodbyes so she could get to her own work in the Emergency Department.

Not long after she left, Dr. Ahmadi and Alejandra came in with the Echo and EKG machines. Troy kissed Harris’s forehead and climbed off the bed. Harris unzipped all the different parts of his hoodie and pulled it off handing it to Troy. Troy held onto it within his arms crossed over his chest as Alejandra and Dr. Ahmadi placed the leads on Harris’s body. Troy watched Harris becoming antsy. His fingers drumming against the bed and one of his feet shaking anxiously under the blanket. Troy dropped a hand down, tangling his fingers with Harris’s, brushing a thumb against his, and Harris squeezed his hand back tightly. Harris closed his eyes and took a deep breath, in through the nose and out through the mouth, as Dr. Ahmadi turned on the machine and it began beeping to the beat of Harris’s heart.

                  After a few minutes, Dr. Ahmadi looked at the readout, with a look that, Troy noticed with relief, looked very satisfied. “This looks much better, Harris. We can absolutely give you a ten-day script and get you discharged in the next hour or two. I’ll get Jamie started on it when she gets in at 7. Just make sure you keep it low key for a few more days. Get some rest, don’t overdo it. Okay?” He looked at Harris and then at Troy with raised eyebrows impressing his meaning upon them both.

                  Troy felt his cheeks flush and he nodded, pressing his lips together to keep from laughing. Harris looked nonplussed but nodded as well. It wasn’t necessarily that they had sex every day when they were together, but… okay it was pretty close. That’s not what mattered right now, though. Harris feeling better and staying that way was what mattered, and Troy wasn’t going to jeopardize that in any way.

                  When Dr. Ahmadi got all the leads off of Harris and left, Harris actually pouted and crossed his arms like a kid and Troy couldn’t help but chuckle as he settled back in next to him. “Frustrated about something, love?” he asked, batting his eyelashes comedically.

                  Harris shoved his shoulder, giving him very sassy side eye. “Yes…” he said glumly. “If I feel better, I should be able to go back to… my regular activities…” he said, raising his eyebrows in such a way as to intimate to Troy that getting railed by him was one of those regular activities.

                  “Was yesterday not enough to last you a couple of days?” Troy smiled, biting the inside of his cheek, loving how cranky Harris was at being told he couldn’t get any for a bit, but knowing he would also be going out of his mind being around Harris and unable to get any relief that he knew they’d both desperately want.

                  Harris sighed heavily and thunked his head against Troy’s shoulder. “Yesterday was fucking fantastic… I just wished I had felt better, and you hadn’t been worrying about me.”

                  Troy threaded his fingers into the hair at the back of Harris’s neck and kissed the crown of his head. “I know, Harris, but give it two more days. Thursday, I have morning practice, then its just you and me. Okay?

                  Harris sighed again, “Yes, okay…” He looked up at Troy and puckered his lips hopefully.

                  Troy grinned and kissed him, putting and arm around him and pulling him closer against his chest as a boisterous Russian accent filled the room.

                  “Harris! Barrett!” Ilya said brightly as he walked in the room.

                  “Hey Cap,” Troy said, as he’d taken to calling his friend, at the same time as Harris asked, “Ilya? What are you doing here?”

                  Ilya smiled easily, but Troy could see the tightness in his eyes as he took in Harris, and then watched the tightness ease. “I came to check on Chiron and Styx dads, they were concerned, and I told them I would make sure everything is okay. So, everything is okay, yes?” Ilya gave Harris’s shoulder a quick squeeze and then moved to sit in the chair at the end of the bed.

                  “Yeah, everything is okay. They’re discharging him in an hour or so,” Troy explained.

                  “Yep, meds and a couple more days of rest and I’ll be all good,” Harris confirmed.

                  Ilya smiled again and nodded. “This is wonderful.” Ilya scratched the back of his neck nervously. “I’m very glad you’re okay, Harris. I was… worried,” Ilya admitted.

                  Troy swallowed around that nagging lump in his throat that had returned.

                  “Thanks, Ilya. For coming, for helping with the boys. You’re a great friend.” Harris sounded a little choked up himself.

                  Troy nodded in fervent agreement. “Yeah, man. Thank you,” he said roughly. Troy got up and walked toward him as Ilya stood up to meet him in a strong fraternal embrace.

“Anytime, seriously,” Ilya said quietly in Troy’s ear. Troy patted his back a couple of times and stepped back, coughing away the tightness in his throat.

Ilya left a hand on Troy’s shoulder and squeezed it firmly, nodding, making eye contact as if to say, “He’s okay, so you’re okay.” “We’ll bring the boys back this afternoon, yeah?”

“Yeah, thanks, Ilya.”

“It was our pleasure, of course,” he said, patting Troy’s shoulder. “We’ll see you later today. Make sure you follow the doctor’s orders, yes Harris? Captain’s orders, too.” He pointed at Harris with a wink.

Harris blushed a little and gave Ilya a mock salute. “Yes, captain.”

As Ilya headed out, he passed Jamie, who was coming back in to remove Harris’s IV. Troy moved back to Harris and helped him out of his many-zippered hoodie. As Jamie removed the IV line, Troy got into Harris’s bag and pulled out his new change of clothes, placing them on the bed.

“Alright, friend. I’ll be back as soon as your discharge has processed with discharge instructions. Should be in the next half an hour or so. You can take a shower if you’d like.” Jamie left, closing the door behind her.

Troy brushed aside some hair that had flopped over Harris’s forehead and around his ear, brushing his thumb gently over the shell of it, and asked, “Shower?” Harris looked up at Troy, his pupils large and his breathing deepening. Troy hated having to shake his head slightly. “Not that kind of shower…”

Harris closed his eyes and sighed. “I know, I’ll shower by myself…”

Troy sat next to him and cupped the back of Harris’s neck, moving his face in close. “I know this is going to suck, Harris. It’s going to be a very long couple of days for us both. But at home, if you promise to be good, we can soak in the bathtub together for a while, okay? Use one of those bath bombs you love and relax together.”

Harris smiled serenely, “That sounds perfect.” He grabbed the collar of Troy’s t-shirt, pulling gently and pressing his lips to Troy’s in a couple of short kisses. “Thursday?”

Troy hummed a little and squeezed the back of Harris’s neck. “Thursday, my love.” He placed the pile of Harris’s clothes on his lap and squeezed his knee.

Harris headed into the bathroom to shower and Troy let out a huge sigh when the door closed. This next couple of days was going to be really difficult. They’d need to come up with some way to stay busy. They’d follow Dr. Ahmadi’s recommendations, and then when Harris was at 100%, he could abide by Harris’s wishes that he not be gentle with him again.

 - - -

                  As Harris scrubbed at the adhesive that remained on his skin from the EKG leads, he found himself feeling so grateful for Troy. He knew that if his parents or his sisters had been the ones to call his doctor, it would have felt like he was a child who could not take care of himself. Troy did not make him feel like that. He had been concerned, but listened when Harris told him he was okay, until he could tell Harris was lying even to himself, and then reached out and asked an expert. He was loving and kind and supportive in sharing with Harris how important he felt it was that he get checked out, and most of all, he was right. There was something wrong and had it been any more serious, it could have been life-threatening. Harris knew he was liable to be very stubborn and, though he was very diligent about going to his planned appointments, he was very fearful about emergency situations because they had the most likelihood of going downhill quickly, even in the hospital.

As he continued to scrub and shampoo his hair, Harris began to brainstorm ways to show Troy how grateful he was and how much he loved and trusted Troy. With his promotion to Media Communications Department Head, Harris was now making a very comfortable salary and with Troy’s contract, obviously they were not hurting for money. Troy never knew what to spend his money on, but he made sure Harris had access to his account. Harris only ever used it for stuff for the house or groceries or stuff for the boys, but he loved how completely Troy trusted him.

Harris rinsed and dried off really well and ran a comb through his hair, then brushed his teeth and used his little electric shaver to take down his multiple days of stubble into his more typical amount. Harris put on jeans, a Drover Family Orchard t-shirt, and a red plaid button down which he wore open over the t-shirt. He braced himself against the sink and took a deep breath and for the first time in several days, it didn’t feel like much extra work. There was still a little bit of a tickle at the end that he coughed away, but overall, he felt so much better, especially post-shower. He held two fingers against his wrist, checking his own pulse which seemed steady and regular. Harris gathered his clothes and headed back out of the bathroom.

Troy was sitting on the bed on the side closest to the bathroom, waiting. When he saw Harris, a crooked grin split his blank face, and his bright blue eyes sparkled. Harris smiled shyly and dumped his dirty sweats into his bag next to Troy on the bed as Troy hooked his fingers into the loops of Harris’s jeans, pulling him close in between his legs. Harris looped his arms gently around Troy’s neck and threaded his fingers into the hair at his nape. Troy rested his forehead against Harris’s chest, breathing deeply and wrapping his arms around Harris’s back.

Harris dipped down and pressed his lips to the crown of Troy’s head. “How ya doin’ champ?” he asked gently.

Troy huffed a laugh against Harris’s chest and shook his head as he lifted it to look into Harris’s eyes. His eyes were watery and full of relief. “I’m amazing. I love you.”

Harris smiled and brought his hand around Troy’s neck to cup his cheek, brushing a thumb across the dark skin under his eye. Harris dipped his head, brushing his nose against Troy’s and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. When their lips separated, they stayed close, their foreheads and noses resting against each other. “I love you, too. So fucking much.” Harris’s voice was rough. He moved in closer, burying his face against Troy’s neck, breathing in his clean, spicy scent, drawing a ridiculous amount of comfort and security from Troy’s sure arms wrapped around Harris firmly and his steady breathing matching Harris’s own.

They stayed like that for a bit until they heard Jamie come in saying, “Okay, I have discharge… ope. Sorry, boys.” She laughed as they looked up at her. Harris turned in Troy’s arms but stayed close. Troy kept a hand on Harris’s back.

Jamie smiled and went over the discharge instructions with both of them, which mostly included Harris continuing to rest and take it easy for at least a couple of days, taking the continued antibiotics twice a day, and letting Dr. Ahmadi know if he still felt off at all once he’d finished them.

 - - -

On the way home, they pulled into a drive-thru of a Jersey Mike’s to get some lunch. When they got home, they ate on the couch, continuing to watch Schitt’s Creek, cuddling under a blanket once they’d finished their subs.  Troy was lazily running his fingers over Harris’s forearm under the blanket as Harris dozed against his chest when the doorbell rang.

Harris blinked awake and sat up. “Must be Ilya and Shane with the boys.”

Troy pressed a kiss to Harris’s cheek and said, “I got it. Stay here. You wanna see ‘em?”

“For a little bit, sure.” Harris ran a hand through his own hair which looked adorably disheveled.

Troy smiled as he headed to the door and let in Chiron, Styx, Ilya, and Shane.

“Hey guys,” he said as he bent down to give the boys pets.

“Barrett,” Ilya said, clapping him on the shoulder when he stood up. “How’s Harris?”

“He’s in here and he’d love to see you,” Harris called from the living room.”

All three men in the foyer laughed and followed as the dogs headed toward their other dad. When they all got into the living room, Shane and Ilya settled in on the other end of the sectional, facing Harris and Troy as Troy settled back in behind Harris who now had a blanket and also a blanket of dogs covering him.

“How are you feeling, Harris?” Shane asked.

“Better, still tired, but I think that’s mostly because they only let me sleep a couple hours at a time in the hospital, but I’ll have plenty of time over the next couple days to get good rest. Don’t worry about me,” Harris replied with a smile. Troy could tell it was a little fake, and he thought he saw Ilya’s eyes narrow a little, noticing as well. The man was too damn perceptive for anyone’s good, but also for everyone’s.

They chatted for a bit, but after maybe 20 minutes, Harris yawned loudly and then laughed. “Sorry, guys. I can head upstairs to nap if you guys wanted to hang out.”

Troy kept a hand on Harris’s shoulder, not letting him get up, as Ilya and Shane immediately started to shake their heads. “No, no. We’ll go, but let us know about Friday if you’re still up for dinner, okay?” Shane confirmed as they stood.

“I should be, but we’ll let you know,” Harris assured them.

“Bye Barrett, bye Harris, Bye Chiron, Bye Styx,” Ilya said adorably.

“Bye Cap, Bye Hollander” Troy said at the same time Harris said, “Bye Ilya, bye Shane”

- - -

They left and Harris rolled so that he was lying on Troy, who was propped on a pillow against the arm of the couch. The dogs went to their beds under the TV, settling back in. Harris laid chest to chest on Troy with his face buried in Troy’s neck. Troy threaded his own fingers together resting on Harris’s lower back and kissed his cheek, letting his face rest against Harris’s and breathing in his light apple scent. Troy loved the pressure of Harris’s body resting atop his own and the quiet comfort of cuddling with the man he loved in their home while they watched a show and their dogs snoozed in their own big comfy beds. Troy was again struck by how different his life looked now than it had just two years ago. He had everything he could possibly want: a beautiful man who he loved and who loved him; a beautiful home with said man and two amazing dogs; an incredible hockey career with a team he loved who loved and supported him AND his boyfriend both. He was determined never to take any of it for granted. He knew he was the luckiest man on the planet, and he would do everything in his power to make sure he kept this precious slice of paradise he’d secured himself safe.

                  After a couple of hours napping on the couch, Harris sat up and stretched. Troy watched him greedily, seeing the skin of Harris’s soft stomach where his hoodie rode up. Troy sat up as well, rolling his neck and scooting closer again to Harris. Harris looked at him and smiled. “I believe I was promised a bath.”

                  Troy smiled wide. “You absolutely were.”

He leaned in a kissed Harris, then stood and held out a hand for him. They headed upstairs and Troy got the water running, hot but not scalding, in their large jacuzzi tub that sat beside their glass shower. Once there was enough water, Troy dropped in the apple pie scented bath bomb and turned back to Harris who was already undressed. He smiled and pulled off his own t-shirt and slid down his sweats and boxer briefs, tossing them into the hamper as Harris walked over. Troy held out a hand for Harris to use to steady himself as he climbed in, and then Troy lowered himself in behind him.

“So,” Troy said as Harris settled back against his chest, resting his arms on Troy’s knees. “I promise I’ll stop soon, but how are you feeling?”

Harris’s lips quirked into a small smile and he squeezed Troy’s knee. “Better than yesterday, not 100%, but a lot better than I did.”

Troy kissed his shoulder then behind his ear. “Good.”

Harris sighed happily at the contact, and said quietly, “I wish we could…”

“I know… it’s just until you’re back to 100%... but I’ll listen whenever you tell me that is. Ok? Just be honest with me… and with yourself,” Troy pleaded quietly, speaking close to Harris’s ear.

Harris turned his head and his forehead rested against Troy’s cheek. “Okay. I will. I’m sorry I wasn’t the other night…”

Troy wrapped his arms around Harris’s chest and held him tightly. “You have nothing to apologize for. I can’t possibly understand what must have been warring in your mind. The what-ifs you must think about every single day when your pulse jumps or whatever. It’s always sitting in the back of your mind, and the center of your chest. I get to forget about it. I get to have all of your joy and fun and laughter. I get to have your intense passion for hockey and your friends and the team. I get to hold your hand on planes and when we watch scary movies and go on walks with the boys. I get time with you and your family where we don’t ever mention it at all…”

Harris shifted to be able to look at Troy and there were tears in his eyes. “Troy…”

“I love that I get to forget about it, though I think that will happen less now… but if it’s weighing on you, I want you to tell me. Let me carry some of that, Harris. All I ever want is to give you what you need and take care of you and help to make your life everything you want it to be…” Troy held Harris’s face, staring into his deep green eyes.

A couple of tears trailed down Harris’s cheeks and Troy kissed them away then kissed his lips. “Okay,” Harris whispered.

They soaked for a while, kissing and touching lightly (in appropriate areas only), both half hard, but neither making a move to do anything about it, following the doctor’s orders. When the water went tepid, they let it drain and then showered quickly together. They headed to the bedroom as they dried off and Troy caught Harris around the waist pulling him close. “Want a massage?”

                  Harris looked up at him with heat flickering in his gaze. “I’ll take what I can get, big guy.”

He smiled and kissed Troy lightly. Both of them put on only boxer briefs and Harris moved the duvet and sheets out of the way before lying down on his belly as Troy grabbed a bottle of massage oil in a sandalwood scent he and Harris loved that had been used at the spa they went to on their “second date”.

Troy straddled Harris’s legs and as he drizzled some of the oil on Harris’s lower back, knowing it bothered him the most due to his long hours sitting in an office chair editing, his half hard erection bumped against Harris’s ass and both of them groaned a little. Troy focused got to work, using his strong hands to ease the tension from Harris’s tight muscles, making his way up Harris’s spine. He spent a while around Harris’s shoulder blades and then moved up to Harris’s neck which gave him trouble from staring at his phone for a long time on social media. As he worked, he did have to work really hard to ignore the erection that had become much more insistent throughout the process, especially because Harris was making a lot of very sexy noises of positive encouragement.

“Oh yeah, right there, fuck that’s tight, holy shit…” he babbled as Troy massaged Harris until he was loose and relaxed.

When he finished, mostly because his hands were tired, he said, “Feel better?”

“I feel fucking incredible, but also a bit frustrated…” he laughed as he turned over under Troy and bumped their erections together.

Troy groaned loudly and looked tortured as he stared into Harris’s eyes. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to Harris’s lips that held every bit of desire and frustration, then pulled away quickly, leaving Harris breathless. “We can’t…” he whispered through gritted teeth as he shook his head and moved off of Harris. “Come on… you need to eat and take meds and we have got to distract ourselves from this…”

He offered a hand to Harris. Harris sighed and took it, and they both slipped on some pajama pants and t-shirts before heading back downstairs. As Troy pulled together some pasta and sauce with garlic bread for a quick and easy dinner, Harris sat at the countertop bar, resting his chin on his arms and watching Troy work.

Once everything was going, Troy turned and leaned his hip against the counter next to the stove and asked, “Do you need anything from your office before next week?”

Harris considered for a moment and shook his head, but his heart went a little gooey at Troy thinking about what he might need professionally as well as medically, personally, and sexually. “No, I have my laptop, so I should be good. I’ll schedule some posts tomorrow to go up over the next couple of days. I’ll come to the game Friday and take some video, but I won’t go in before. I’ll take it easy…” he said the last part on a large, put upon sigh.

Troy smiled at him and pushed off the counter, coming around and turning the spinning chair, which Harris sat up allowing him to do. Troy stepped in and wrapped his arms around Harris, which Harris returned looping his arms around Troy’s neck. “So, I have practice tomorrow morning, but after that, I thought we could go to the Cidery for lunch so you can see your sisters, and then hang out with your parents’ house for the afternoon, so we’re not just hanging out horny at home,” Troy laughed a little at his alliterative moment and Harris joined him.

Harris looked up at Troy and said lovingly, “You’re gonna have to stop being so perfect all the time, because all it does is keep making me want to kiss you forever, and never leave your arms, all of which leads to really wanting to fuck you or you to fuck me or both…” Harris’s bottom lip poked out in a pout.

Troy smiled widely, rubbing his hands over Harris’s back and chuckled, “I will do what I can to stop being quite so fuckable, but I am completely in love with you, so I’m not sure how well that will work.”

                  “Yeah, me being completely in love in return doesn’t help either but hanging out with my family at least keeps the temptation down a bit,” Harris agrees with a chuckle.

                  Troy kissed Harris’s forehead and walked back over to the stove to stir the noodles and sauce. “So, at practice tomorrow, what should I say to the team if they ask about you?”

                  “You can tell them I’m fine, just getting over an infection, and I’ll be back on Monday. You can also tell them to text me. I know they’ll be worried, but the rest of them don’t really know about my history…” Harris explained, a little embarrassed.

                  Troy didn’t say anything, just nodded and lifted his eyebrows at Harris expectantly as he stirred the sauce.

                   “I hate telling people… they always get this look of sympathy or pity in their eyes that I hate…” Harris lamented.

                  “Those guys love you, Harris… almost as much as I do, and definitely like you’re family.” Troy turned off the heat for the pasta and sauce and pulled out plates while Harris considered this.  He pulled the garlic bread out of the oven and set it on the stove then began to plate their dinner.

                   “I know… I just hate it when people find out and then they’re like checking in all the time because it’s like I’m the guy with the heart problem, not their friend who knows their families and not the social media guy who can’t put down his phone, or whatever they already know me as, it’s like Heart Patient takes over any other thing I might be known for…” Harris twisted his mouth

                  “That’s not how it was with me…” Troy said quietly. “Or Wyatt or Ilya or Shane…”

                  “I know… it’s kind of irrational… I’m so proud to be gay, but so embarrassed about a medical issue I’ve had my whole life…” Harris sighed and thunked his head on his arms on the counter.

Troy plated their food, and they ate at the bar in quiet companionship. Once they finished, Troy rinsed their plates and put them in the dishwasher while Harris took his evening dose of antibiotics. Waiting for Troy to finish while leaning against the counter just watching his beautiful boyfriend move around the kitchen. Harris thought back, as he often did, to the man he’d met when Troy came to Ottawa. He’d been so shy and timid, so used to just whipping out an asshole comment to hide his true feelings, so desperately in need of connection and community and reassurance. This Troy had found himself, who he really wants to be. He was confident in his identity, he had so much community and knew he was not only not alone, but had a full support system and an incredible career and was such an incredible partner. Harris’s lips quirked up into a smile at how incredibly lucky he felt every single day to have this man in his life.

Troy finished and started the dishwasher, then came over to Harris bracing his hands on either side of Harris on the counter. “You could tell them, Harris. I really think they’d all be good about it,” Troy said sympathetically.

Harris stared into his beautiful blue eyes considered, then nodded. “Maybe when I get back.”

Troy nodded, “Whenever you’re comfortable with it.” dipping his head to kiss him slowly. Harris wrapped his arms around Troy’s back, linking his hands together, resting them against his lower back, lightly rubbing his thumb under the hem of his t-shirt. Troy’s tongue slipped into Harris’s mouth and caressed his own as Harris moaned a little desperate noise from the back of his throat. Troy nipped at Harris’s bottom lip as he pulled back and presses close but breaks the kiss.

“Sorry…” Troy whispered huskily.

“Never be sorry for that,” Harris assured him. “I’d actually be very cool with going upstairs and doing more of just that until we fall asleep if you’re interested.”

“You sure?”

“Please? I just want to kiss you and be close… I want more, but I don’t need it right now…” Harris assured him. Harris really wanted more, but again, he’d take what he could get and he really needed to make out with his boyfriend tonight.

So, they did. They climbed in bed facing one another, tangling their legs, wrapping their arms around each other and kissed long and slow and steady for a long time before Harris just couldn’t hold his eyes open anymore and he pressed a kiss to Troy’s chest and laid his head against Troy’s shoulder to fall asleep. Troy watched as Harris fell asleep and according to his own eyelids, he wasn’t far behind, so he kissed Harris’s forehead and settled in to fall asleep as well.

                  The following day, they ate breakfast together and then Troy headed to the rink for practice. Harris took his meds and then took his time getting ready for the day before taking his laptop to his “small” (if any room in this house could be called small) home office. He checked some comments on posts, replied a little, got into a bit of a Twitter tiff with the new Social Media director from Winnepeg, and then Troy was coming through the door as he left his office because Gen had seen his comments popping up and texted him to stop working while he was supposed to rest. He rolled his eyes but sent her a tongue-out emoji and heart emoji.

                  He met Troy at the bottom of the stairs and smiled as Troy looked him over. “Hey there,” he said, smiling and holding Harris by the hips. “You look like you feel a lot better. Have more energy.”

                  “I absolutely do,” Harris said, looping his arms around Troy’s neck. “Anyone ask about me?”

                  Troy linked his hands together behind Harris, holding him close. “Gen found me on the ice, made sure you’re actually okay. She doesn’t seem to trust your texts.” Harris huffed a laugh. “Coach asked after you also. Bood and Dykstra noted they hadn’t seen you in a while and asked where you’d been, so I told them you hadn’t been feeling well but were feeling better now. They both agreed that was weird since you’re never sick, but I said you were getting over a pretty nasty cold and Roz and Wyatt backed me up.”

                  “Thanks for not saying any more than that… I want to tell them in person, just to answer any questions they might have…” Harris admitted nervously.

“Hey, you’re my partner. What’s between us stays here unless you’re in physical danger or you say it goes elsewhere. Always, okay?” Troy looked intensely into Harris’s eyes, making sure he understood.

Harris nodded and leaned in, kissing him slowly.

                  Troy gripped Harris’s hips pressing close and sighed into the kiss. He relished in the taste of coffee and Harris’s unique flavor and when Harris seemed to be trying to further deepen the kiss, Troy gently backed off, with lighter kisses and finally pulled away. “Let me change and we can head out to the farm,” Troy said quietly.

                  “You must be a saint,” Harris chuckled and kissed Troy’s cheek, moving off the bottom stair and squeezing his hand as he passed him.

                  “I am definitely not,” Troy assured him, pulling his hand and bringing Harris’s back to his front, pressing his partially erect cock against Harris’s backside. “Please don’t think that this is easy for me, love,” Troy murmured into Harris’s ear, kissing behind his neck.

                  Harris groaned, “I know.” He stepped away and turned around. “I’m sorry, I’m not making it any easier… but, I mean, have you seen you??? ughhhhh…” Harris lamented.

                  Troy looked tortured and sad and blew out a long breath, coming back to Harris and resting their foreheads together. “I don’t know that you’ve seen you, Harris. I truly hope that I’m literally always this turned on by you. It is super frustrating right now, but I am so fucking grateful for the privilege it is that I get to love you and to make love to you, and to be loved by you and I will do whatever it takes to keep being able to do that for as long as humanly possible. So, it’s not easy for me to back off or say no, but I’d feel so fucking guilty if we gave in today and you started to feel worse. I’d always feel like it was my fault and then we couldn’t for even longer. Does that make sense?”

                  Harris nodded against Troy’s forehead. “Yeah, it makes all the sense in the world.” Harris’s voice was thick with tears.

                  Troy pulled away, cupping Harris’s face in both hands. “If you feel even better tomorrow, I’m here for it, but let’s at least give it today, okay?”

                  “Okay, I’m sorry…” Harris looked up at Troy sadly.

                  “You don’t have anything to be sorry for, love.” Troy kissed him sweetly. “Just stop trying to seduce me. I’m already seduced as soon as you’re back to 100%.”

                  They both laughed and Troy kissed Harris on the tip of his nose before heading upstairs to change. Harris sighed heavily as he went to the door to put on his shoes and coat and to get the boys ready to go to the farm.  

                  As they spent the day with Harris’s family and all their dogs, Harris relished in the time. They dropped the boys off at the house and then drove through the orchard to get to the Cidery to eat lunch.

Neither Harris nor Troy drank the alcoholic cider, but they did enjoy some ice-cold normal apple cider and delicious turkey, apple, gouda paninis and French fries. Margot and Anna sat with them for a bit, and chatted as they ate, the worry in their eyes lessening as they saw that Harris was back to himself and feeling mostly well again. Once they finished lunch, including sharing a delicious heaping helping of apple crisp and ice cream, Margot and Anna hugged them both.

                  When Anna hugged Troy, she lifted up and whispered, “Thank you for asking for help.”

                  He squeezed her a little tighter, “Thanks for answering.” He kissed her on the cheek as he pulled back and smiled. She smiled in return and squeezed his hand, and he knew, though he’d already felt so welcome and accepted by the family, that he had forged a true sibling bond with Anna through this situation, and that felt really incredible.

                  They headed back over to the house and, as they walked in amongst the cacophony of dogs, Harris smelled mulled cider and heard the unmistakable crackling of oil frying. “Are you making more fritters, Mom?” he called as they removed their coats, hanging them on the hooks inside the door and heading into the kitchen.

                  She turned from the stove, smiling and reached out to hug them both. “Of course I am, dear. They’re your favorite.” She kissed him on the cheek and wiped away the reside of her Chapstick with her thumb.

                  Harris blushed and smiled. “Thanks mom,” he said shyly.

                  Troy and Harris sat with mugs of mulled cider and chatted while she cooked, Harris’s dad coming in after a bit and joining them. Once they had some fritters, they played a game of Euchre, then moved to the living room and all watched a movie together.

                  After another game of Euchre and some dinner, Harris started yawning pretty consistently, so Troy said they should head home. On the drive, his fingers were laced with Harris’s on the center console and Harris’s head was on his shoulder as he dozed. When Troy pulled in their driveway, he kissed the top of Harris’s head, which was covered in a Centaurs’ toque and gently shook his own shoulder. Harris sat up and looked at him with sleepy eyes.

                  “Come on, sleepyhead, let’s get you tucked in for the night,” Troy chuckled, getting out and rushing around to open Harris’s door for him.

                  “Okay, daddy,” Harris said with a sultry smile, and Troy’s eyes went wide, then he laughed.

                  “Nope, no thanks, that is not my kink,” Troy said shaking his head.

                  Harris laughed and they headed inside. Harris took his medicine as Troy hung up their coats, and then they headed upstairs. They stripped down to their briefs and climbed into bed, tangling their legs and wrapping their arms around each other under the comforter. Troy’s nose rested against Harris’s forehead and Harris’s beard brushed lightly against Troy’s chest. Troy lightly moved his thumb against Harris’s side as Harris moved his hand over Troy’s spine.

Without moving, Troy pressed a light kiss to the bridge of Harris’s nose and whispered, “I love you, Harris.”

Harris sighed gently and turned his face, pressing a kiss to Troy’s shoulder. “I love you, Troy.” Harris yawned and settled closer against Troy, and both men drifted off to sleep.

When Harris woke up, he was alone in bed. Looking at his phone, there was a text from Troy from about an hour before.

Troy: Good morning, love. Wanted to let you rest. Had to get in a workout before practice. Home around 4. Don’t work too hard. I love you 

                  Harris smiled and stretched, taking a deep breath and letting it out. No cough, no difficulty breathing, no congestion. For the first time in almost two weeks, Harris felt like himself, completely. He pulled up the selfie camera on his phone and held it away from him, making sure his hair was adorably messy, and snapped a pic of his own sleepy smile, sending it to Troy.

                                    Harris: Have a good practice! I promise I’ll take it easy, but I feel great! I love you <3

Troy: Good god, warn a guy before sending a thirst trap, will ya? I almost fell off the treadmill! :P

                  As promised, Harris took it easy. He made his favorite apple cinnamon oatmeal for breakfast and then scheduled some posts and replied to some comments for the Centaurs’ social media. He went out with the boys and played fetch for a while and then took them for a short walk around the block. He also texted some of his friends and made plans for the following week, when Troy would be on the road to Toronto. He’d be home on the bus late that night, but Harris hadn’t seen his friends in a while and after he’d ended up in the hospital, he wanted to make it a bigger priority to make sure he stayed connected with his community. He loved Troy more than anything in the world, and he loved his job and his family, but he’d had a pretty bad habit of being too busy for anything or anyone else. He and a few friends decided they’d do dinner and drinks at a pub in downtown Ottawa the night of the game, so he could still watch them play while spending time with his people. Harris wished Troy could be a part of this side of his community, but he knew that he had an incredible community in his team both on and off the ice, and of both queer and non-queer people.

                  Troy got home around four, as he’d promised, and Harris was finishing the pot roast he’d been letting cook in the crock-pot all day. “Hey there,” Harris called out when he heard Troy come in and drop his hockey bag.

                  “That smells delicious,” Troy told him, coming into the kitchen and standing behind Harris, his hands on Harris’s hips. Troy pressed a kiss to Harris’s neck lightly, then buried his face against his shoulder. “You smell delicious,” he murmured.

                  Harris turned around and Troy’s gaze was like the blue inside of a flame, beautiful and scorching. Harris lifted his hands up, threading his fingers through Troy’s hair and Troy came so willingly toward him until their mouths met in a kiss carrying every degree of the heat that had been building between them both for almost two full days. Troy pulled Harris close, holding him tight around the back with one arm, the other sliding down to grip Harris ass. Harris whimpered a bit into the kiss and his already half hard dick found pressure against Troy’s and their tongues found each other as they opened for one another. Troy groaned as they kissed like they were trying to devour each other, and Harris pushed off the counter he’d been pressed against, their mouths not leaving one another, but moving out of the kitchen and toward the living room. They carefully navigated their furniture with a laugh into the kiss and then Troy lowered Harris down to the couch, kneeling in front of him and reaching for the band of Harris’s sweatpants and boxer briefs. He slid them down just enough to free Harris’s (adorable) hard cock.

He pulled his lips from Harris’s, moving one hand to wrap around him and tugged lightly, Harris groaned, and his head rolled back, as a bead of precome escaped the tip and Troy smiled. “May I?”

“Uh huh,” Harris nodded. “Please, Troy,” he said desperately, guiding Troy’s head down gently, keeping his fingers threaded through his silky dark hair.

Troy held the base with one hand and the other slipped under Harris’s shirt, into the fuzzy hair on his chest resting over his heart. Troy slid his luscious lips over Harris’s tip as he began to roll his nipple between his fingers hard enough to twinge, but only just, and then Troy’s tongue swirled over him and Harris moaned loudly. “God, Troy, holy shit” he babbled in a high voice.

Troy pulled off for a moment with a smile and he pulled Harris’s pants and underwear the rest of the way off, tossing them to the other end of the couch. Then Troy hooked his arms under Harris’s thighs and dipped his head to really get to work, taking Harris all the way into his throat and swallowing around his head as his tongue danced along the backside of his shaft, all the while Harris cried out in moans and whimpers. “Fuck, oh my god, Troy, yes, just like… oh fuck, I’m close, so fucking close,” he warned.

Troy redoubled his efforts, pulled back and lapping greedily at tip with swirls and flicks of his tongue and one hand moving to gently tug on Harris’s tightly clenched balls. It was like opening a hydrant. Harris cried out and filled Troy’s mouth, spilling down his throat. Once Troy had swallowed all he had to give, he pulled away, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and looking up into the beautifully flushed face of his raggedly breathing boyfriend. “You good?” he asked, moving a hand to Harris’s face.

Harris sighed loudly and opened his eyes. “So fucking good,” he smiled and pulled Troy in for a kiss.

“Amazing, now we can eat dinner, and then I can take my time with you in bed,” Troy grinned and the corners of his eyes crinkled with his joy as he gazed down at Harris.

Harris smiled and nodded brushing his thumb across Troy’s cheek. “You’ve certainly taken the edge off, sir, that’s for sure.”

Troy licked his lips and leaned in, kissing Harris slowly. When he moved away, he grabbed Harris’s sweatpants and handed them to him to put back on, then stood as Harris did so. Once he was dressed again, Troy put out a hand to Harris and pulled him up and into his arms, hugging him tightly, kissing his temple and breathing him in deeply. Harris, too, was drinking in his fill of Troy’s scent from where his face was pressed against his chest. They were silent for a moment, just breathing one another in, and then pulled away with small, contented smiles before they walked together to the kitchen and plated up dinner together.

While they ate at the actual dining table, Harris told Troy about his plans for the following week. “So, when you’re at the Toronto game, I made plans to have dinner with some of my friends here in town.” Harris was maybe a little nervous. This was the first time he’d done this since they started dating, and he didn’t think Troy would be jealous, but it just wasn’t something they’d navigated before, and he’d been in relationships where a similar situation had gone…poorly.

Troy raised an eyebrow and then furrowed his brows. “Harris, why do you look like you think you’re in trouble?”

Harris sighed and blew out a breath. “Sorry. In the past, when I would tell someone I was dating that I was going out with my friends without them, it was… not great. They got jealous and angry and thought I was going to cheat on them… I don’t think that’s how you’ll feel, but… I’m usually so busy that it just hadn’t come up yet.” He explained quickly, flushing a little with embarrassment.

They were sitting at a corner of the table, so they were still very close to one another. Troy put down his fork and reached out taking Harris’s hand in his. He pressed a kiss to the back of it and brushed his thumb along Harris’s. “I want you to stay in touch with your friends, Harris. There is a kernel of jealousy in me for the people you were with before; I won’t lie, but I would never begrudge you spending time with people you care about. I would like to know if those people are people you’ve slept with or dated, but that’s not going to change how I feel about the fact that you’re an adult and my boyfriend who I love. I trust you and believe you would never do anything to hurt me, mostly because I know you to be a better human being than almost anyone I know, but which is also a wild feeling in the wake of Adrian and his bullshit. Here I am, though, in a relationship built on openness and trust and not secrets and lies. Makes a world of difference.” Troy’s lips quirked into a crooked smile. “So, who are you going with?”

Harris smiled and his eyes felt a bit wet, which he blinked away quickly as he squeezed Troy’s hand on the table. “A couple of my friends from college, they’re actually in a relationship with each other Zach and Dayton, and no, I never had anything going on with either one of them, and my friend Janelle or JJ depending on how they’re feeling that day, who I’ve known since high school. We’re going to Apothecary, downtown for dinner and drinks. I’ll be home before you are, for sure. Thank you for trusting me.”

“Thank you for making it so easy to do.” Troy leaned in sliding a hand around Harris’s neck and pulled him in for a gentle lingering kiss.

They broke apart and continued eating. Troy gave Harris the rundown of practice and Harris updated him on his day as they finished eating. Troy took their plates to the kitchen and Harris followed, packing up the leftovers to put them in the fridge.

Once they had cleaned up the kitchen, as Troy was putting the sponge he had used to wipe down the counters into the holder on the sink, Harris came close behind him and pressed kisses between Troy’s shoulder blades. Troy relaxed back into him, so Harris slid gentle fingers under the hem of his t-shirt, one hand sliding over Troy’s smooth stomach, dipping fingers below the band of his pants and underwear, while the other headed north to tweak his nipple a little as the first hand wrapped around the velvety engorged skin of Troy’s erection.

Troy groaned and in a strangled voice said, “Harris…”

“What do you need, Troy?” Harris murmured against the skin at the back of Troy’s neck as his nose nuzzled in the short soft hairs there.

“I… oh god, I need to fuck you, but, shit Harris,” he tried to get out as Harris applied pressure inside of his pants. “That feels so good.”

Harris smiled and began to jack him with even more purpose and Troy quickly unbuttoned his pants and pulled down his zipper allowing a bit more room for the movement of Harris’s hand. “I want you to fuck me, too, Troy,” he whispered, kissing and licking behind Troy’s ear and loving the little whimper that escaped Troy’s throat as Harris’s thumb brushed over the slightly slippery tip of Troy’s cock. “You’re already leaking,” he chuckled breathily.

As Harris’s breath trailed over the skin of Troy’s neck and shoulder, Troy shivered. Harris rolled his nipple between a thumb and forefinger while swirling his other thumb over the head of his rigid dick again and Troy’s whole body jerked and Harris pulled away, allowing Troy to turn around and descend on him. Crushing his lips to Harris’s, Troy pulled him close with a growl and Harris whimpered as their mouths moved together roughly. Harris plunged his fingers into Troy’s silky hair and Troy gripped his ass, pressing their hard cocks together which made them both groan loudly.

Troy broke the kiss, pressing his forehead to Harris’s, both of them breathing roughly and said huskily, “Upstairs. Now.”

“Absolutely,” Harris agreed, taking a deep breath and stepping back, keeping one of Troy’s hands in his. He blinked, staring at Troy in awe. His hair was wild and messy, his eyes glazed and hooded with lust, lips shiny, red, and swollen, pants unbuttoned and unzipped, his erection straining to escape his underwear. “Shit, Troy,” he said shaking his head, pulling on his hand to bring him back in close, holding his face. “What did I do to deserve you?” he whispered.

Troy’s eyes softened from their intense lust and he smiled shyly. “I ask myself that about you every day, Harris.” He kissed him softly. “Now, can I take you upstairs and remind you why we’re so perfect for each other?”

Harris smiled and tugged on Troy’s hand again, so they both headed up the stairs. When they got into the bedroom and closed the door, Harris turned and crowded Troy up against it, pushing his shirt up and pulling it off, then pressed kisses to his neck, shoulder, between his pecs, and down over his abs as he went to his knees. Harris dragged down Troy’s pants and underwear, freeing his lengthy erection.

Troy’s hand slid into Harris’s hair, tilting his head back to look up at him. “You sure?” he asked.

Harris nodded and leaned forward, sliding his lips around Troy and wrapping his hands around the backs of his thighs. He sighed, relaxing his throat as he sank deep onto Troy, hearing him groan his approval. Troy rolled his hips just a little and Harris hummed around him in approval so he tightened his fingers in Harris’s hair and thrust in and out several times as he ground out, “Harris, oh god, so hot, so beautiful, fuck, oh shit.” He pulled out, wrapping a hand tightly around the base and taking a couple of deep breaths as Harris stood, pulling off his own shirt.

Once Troy had regained some control, he gathered Harris into his arms and kissed him soundly, pressing him backwards, further into their room until they bumped into the bed and Harris sat. Troy bent, sliding his pointer fingers beneath the elastic bands of Harris’s sweats and underwear, pulling them off again and tossing them in the general direction of the laundry. He leaned in pressing kisses to Harris’s neck and up to his ear, palming his erection as he said, “Turn over, I think I’m still a little hungry.”

Harris gasped and did as he was told while Troy sank to his knees beside the bed and Harris positioned himself so that Troy would have easy access to his ass. Troy palmed both cheeks rubbing them and then spread him, pressing his tongue flat against Harris’s hole. Harris thanked the universe that he’d had the foresight to take an “everything” shower today in the best preparation for this evening he possibly could. Troy made circles around his hole and Harris clutched the bedsheets as Troy poked his tongue inside making him cry out, “Troy! Shit, oh my god, oh fuck.”

Troy reached a hand under Harris and palmed his balls which were rapidly tightening. “You ready?”

“God yes, please fuck me, Troy, I need you,” Harris pleaded.

Troy lifted up, pressing kisses to Harris’s spine as he went, and when he got to his neck, he asked softly, “Should I go bare?”

Harris turned his head and Troy moved to the side a little to look at him. His eyes were a little nervous, but mostly full of love and lust. This was not something they’d done yet, but they had both been tested just after they started seeing each other and had been exclusive the entire time, so there was no health risk in it. “Yeah, absolutely, I’ve never been with anyone bare…” Harris admitted.

“Me either, I didn’t with… you know… but I want to, with you, if you do…” Troy said shyly, rubbing a hand along Harris’s side and lower back.

“I trust you, Troy, and I want to be as close as possible. Yes, let’s do it,” Harris confirmed.

“I love you, Harris,” Troy kissed him gently.

“I love you, Troy.”

Troy grabbed lube only from the nightstand and drizzled it on himself and some on a couple of his fingers. Harris was pretty much ready, but just in case, Troy pressed two fingers in and Harris gasped as he found his prostate and massaged a little, at which Harris’s back arched and he moaned.

“Please, Troy,” he whined.

“Okay, I’ve got you.” He pulled out and held onto himself with one hand, holding on to Harris’s hip with the other, and lined himself up, pressing in more quickly than he might have usually, but it was so slick and smooth and felt like a key sliding home in a lock how easily Harris accepted all of him. Troy leaned down, wrapping an arm around Harris’s chest and pulled him up so his back was against Troy’s chest, but Harris was still on his knees on the bed as Troy stood behind him. Troy kissed and licked at Harris’s neck and shoulder as he gave a tentative thrust, just making sure the position would work for them. “You feel so fucking good. You good?” he whispered against Harris’s skin.

“Perfect, feels so smooth, go for it,” Harris rasped.

And so, he did. Troy tightened his grip around Harris and began to thrust in earnest, snapping his hips as Harris matched him in the press and pull, holding onto Troy’s arm across his front as leverage, as he babbled encouragement and moaned loudly. “Oh, fuck, Troy, yes, holy, oh.” Troy locked his lips against the area just below where Harris’s collar would cover and sucked hard, including his teeth a little, as he pounded into him fiercely. Harris lost it. “Shit, Troy, I’m close.” Troy was close, too, so he reached with his other hand and jacked Harris’s cock which made Harris’s muscles tighten, gripping Troy’s own dick even harder, and almost simultaneously, they both came, stilling against one another, breathing raggedly.

Troy kissed his newest love mark softly and Harris pulled his hands away from Troy’s arm and gasped. “Oh, shit, I think you might have some bruises, too,” he sounded horrified.

Troy chuckled as he pulled out slowly and turned Harris around. “I will be fine. How are you?”

Harris moved back to stand with Troy to avoid the mess his own orgasm had made and faced him. Troy caressed his cheek with the back of one hand, the other rested lightly on his shoulder, his thumb brushing over what would be a very prominent hickey for the next several days. “I’m amazing. Completely spent, post double orgasm, but I feel fine otherwise. Pretty glad I put down this towel before I headed downstairs.” Harris quirked an eyebrow at the bed where a bath towel the same color as the comforter had been laid out and the entire wet spot made it onto the towel and not the bed.

Troy smiled and wrapped his arms around Harris. “My man’s a genius.”

“Just well-prepared when I can be,” Harris chuckled rubbing Troy’s back. “Let’s put this in the laundry and shower, yeah?”

“Sounds good,” Troy agreed.

Later, after Harris had run downstairs so he could take his meds and check on the boys, he climbed into bed with Troy who was lying on his back under the covers, staring up at the ceiling pensively.

Troy’s arm automatically wrapped around Harris when he laid his head on Troy’s chest and asked, “Whatchya thinkin’ about, Barrett?” Harris rested one hand on Troy’s chest and was lightly drawing swirls and figure eights on the skin over his heart.

Troy began to do the same over Harris’s back and said softly, “How lucky I am and how I never want to fuck this up.” There was a hitch in Troy’s voice that startled Harris a little and he lifted up on one elbow to see that Troy’s eyes were wet, tears slowly seeping out the sides and down into his hair.

“Oh Troy…” Harris moved a hand up to clear some tears from Troy’s face. “The last few days has been a lot for you, huh?” Harris prompted.

Troy met his eyes and nodded a little. “I was so scared,” he admitted on a whisper.

Harris scooted up a bit to sit propped against the pillows and pulled Troy into his arms. He came gratefully, peppering Harris’s chest with kisses. Harris put a hand against Troy’s cheek and brought his face up to meet his own meeting in a long, comforting kiss. Troy buried his face against Harris’s neck, and they held each other tightly.

“I’m right here, Troy. I’m healthy and whole and right here next to you,” Harris murmured against Troy’s hair.

Troy breathed deep and nodded, saying in a quiet voice, “I know. I can feel your heart beating.” Troy brushed his thumb across Harris’s chest where his hand rested overtop of Harris’s heart and scar. Troy was comforted by the steady beat, and the strong arms, and the gentle rise and fall of Harris’s chest. He prayed he’d never know a day where this beautiful man wasn’t in this world.

Series this work belongs to:

• Part 1 of Troy and Harris: A Legendary Love Story