Work Text:
After leaving the hospital, she doesn’t have much time to go home clean up and change before having to get back to the station to manage today’s chaos. She tries to take a few deep breaths on the elevator ride up to her apartment, ground herself, something. But it’s not working. Bruno almost got killed today saving her life. Nothing similar has happened since she lost Dodds Jr. So, Olivia is more than a little rattled. She didn’t even notice Elliot waiting by her door.
“Liv.”
She jumps.
“Elliot, what are you doing here?”
“I sent you everything I had on those guys, including a CI you can talk to,” he tells her. “But the sound of your voice on the message...it worried me.”
“I’m uh, let’s just get inside.”
Once they step over her threshold, she hangs up her coat and tries to rush off, but Elliot reaches for her and turns Olivia back to face him.
“What can I do?”
Her eyes immediately fill with tears, and he wastes no time folding her into his arms.
“Just this,” she rasps against his neck.
Elliot tightens his hold as she lets go of how terrified she was, her frustrations with the case, and how much she’s missed him, in a deluge of tears. Minutes later, he pulls back and places a chaste kiss on her forehead.
“How’d you know I’d be home?” She asks.
“Rollins,” Elliot answers. “Apparently, I’m not the only one worried about you.”
“I’m fine,” she tells him. “But thank you for checking on me,” she adds. “I don’t have much time to shower and change before I have to be back.”
“Yeah, ya do.”
“Excuse me?”
“Liv, you have another captain and two sergeants to delegate to,” Elliot reasons. “And I’ve already talked to one of them,” he admits. “You can take a few hours for yourself.”
Several emotions play across her face quickly. Initially, she’s pissed that he would overstep in such a way. Then, she realizes she is, in fact, emotionally drained and could use a few hours, so relief and gratitude follow shortly after. Elliot waits her out.
“Okay.”
“Okay?”
“Yeah,” she says, “But don’t push it.”
“Copy that, Cap,” Elliot says.
“Now, why don’t you get cleaned up and changed while I wait on the food.”
“What did you order?”
“Nothing heavy since you gotta get through another few hours of work,” he answers. “I got one of those strawberry salads with mandarin oranges, feta cheese and walnuts.”
“Did you ask for –
“--Balsamic vinaigrette on the side,” he answers before she can ask. “Now stop asking questions like a detective and go.”
She smiles and continues to her bedroom. Inside, she momentarily rests against the door, taking the time to exhale, seemingly for the first time since Bruno’s brush with death. Olivia strips, throws her clothes in the hamper, and turns the shower dials to nearly boiling. She needs the day to be over already, and since it’s not, a hot shower will have to tide her over.
After she washes the soot from her skin and shampoos it from her hair, Olivia grabs a plush towel, dries off, and just stops. She sits at the end of her bed, box-breathing, finding things she can feel, hear, smell, and see. Returning to work as she is wouldn’t be ideal or particularly safe. So, she dons a pair of worn jeans and a button-down, then goes to get her phone. Olivia finds Elliot in the kitchen, sleeves rolled to the elbows, plating her salad, and pouring a glass of wine.
“You know I can’t have a drink in the middle of a workday.”
“You don’t exactly look like you’re going back.” She looks herself over as if she’s forgotten what she just put on. “I was gonna call Curry and Rollins to get an update to--”
“--Check your messages.” Olivia eyes him strangely, but reaches for her phone.
Curry: Thanks to your partner’s intel, we got a suspect in custody. Take the day, Olivia.
“Hhmph,” she says. “And you had nothing to do with this?”
“Nope.”
“You didn’t conspire with my squad to give me the rest of the day off?”
“Feel free to check.”
“Why do I get the feeling you’ve sown some type of loyalty with them, and they wouldn’t admit it if you did?”
Elliot smirks but doesn’t deny it.
“Only where your well-being is concerned, Liv,” he tells her. “Plus, Rollins says Bruno is awake and in stable condition.”
“Good,” she says, smiling. “That’s good to know.”
“So, the wine?”
“Yes, please,” Olivia answers. “But just one. I need to pick up Noah in a few hours.”
“Noted.”
“How is it you have the day off?”
“Family emergency.”
The way Elliot is looking at her like she’s his entire world gives her pause. She stops mid-drink but manages to swallow without choking, avoiding his eyes. Just as she did when she began seeing Cassidy, this new/old thing between them is something she’s successfully been keeping to herself. But she hasn’t said those three words back to him yet.
“El.”
She honestly doesn’t know how to respond to that.
“If I had lost you,” he begins, reaching across the counter and interlacing their fingers. “I don’t know what I would’ve done, so yeah, the job took a backseat today.”
“Thank you,” Olivia manages. “For showing up, feeding me and just...being here, Elliot,” she goes on. “I appreciate it.”
“You don’t have to thank me, Liv,” he tells her, starting on his own salad. “You’ve done the same and more,” he adds. “Least I can do.”
They talk amicably as they finish their lunch. Elliot wants to keep an eye on her a bit longer because she, too, was nearly blown the hell up. So, he talks her into watching the show You on Netflix.
“We would have had that guy arrested halfway through the first season,” Olivia comments, trying to stifle a yawn.
“I don’t doubt that," Elliot says, noticing how sleepy she’s gotten. “Why don’t you nap for a few hours.”
“You sayin’ I look worn out?”
“I’m saying take this rare opportunity to rest in the middle of a workday.”
“Smart man.”
Elliot watches as she gets up, stretching before moving towards her bedroom. He leans further back into the cushions, puts his stocking feet on the coffee table, and gets comfortable. What he doesn’t notice is that she’s stopped in the hallway.
“El?”
“Yeah, Liv?”
“Would you uh, can you...come with me?”
“Come with you?”
“Yeah...to nap.”
Olivia has had the kind of day where you want your favorite pajamas, some comfort food, control of the remote, and to be snuggled up next to someone who loves you. It’s too early for pajamas, there’s no mac & cheese in sight, and he chose the show. But she’ll happily trade all of that to be held the way he did once they get inside her apartment for an hour or two. Olivia gets his hesitance because they’ve yet to share a bed.
“Sure, Liv,” he says. “I can do that.”
He follows Olivia into her bedroom, watching in the doorway as she closes the curtains and uses the dimmer switch. She can’t sleep in complete darkness, not even with Elliot there.
“Be right back,” she tells him.
Olivia disappears into her bathroom, returning moments later in her red cotton pajamas with white piping. Nothing sexy. The same thing she slept in last night. Elliot’s down to his t-shirt and boxers. She gets caught staring.
“What?” He asks. “I can put my pants back on if it makes you uncomfortable. I just didn’t think you’d want --”
“--It’s okay,” she interrupts. “I just don’t see your legs that often,” Olivia adds, smirking. “Nice gams, Stabler.”
Elliot shakes his head, smiling as he climbs in the opposite side she’s chosen.
“Not nicer than yours.”
“Agree to disagree,” she says, smiling and getting comfortable.
Minutes later, they’re still lying there, staring at the ceiling.
“Liv?”
“Yeah, El.”
“You’re still not sleeping.”
“I’m aware,” she says, taking an exasperated exhale.
“I’m exhausted, but I just can’t...shut my mind off.”
“Is this what you pictured when you invited me to nap with you?”
It’s quiet between them for a few moments before she answers.
“No,” she admits.
“Come here, Liv.” She scoots closer to him, and Elliot moves so she can lay her head against his chest and throw her arm over his waist.
“Better?” He asks.
“Much.”
“Breathe with me, Liv.”
She takes deep breaths as he begins scratching against her scalp and massaging the tissue with her hair.
“You’re home, you’re safe…you’re loved,” Elliot says.
She tilts her head up to meet his eyes, then places a hand on the back of his neck and pulls him in for a kiss. It’s deep, passionate, and warms her from head to toe. But both know it's not the time.
“Thank you,” she manages, resuming her position against his chest.
Olivia feels him press another warm kiss against the top of her head as she finally closes her eyes. She’s calm, relaxed, and just before sleep claims her, the filter slips.
“Love you, too,” she murmurs.
He smiles, joins her in slumber.