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“Do you want me to get anything?”
The text message made Louis laugh as he searched for the keys under the rug outside Lestat’s apartment. The other doors in the hallway were already decorated for Halloween, but Lestat’s door had none, which made Louis assume he had gone on a last-minute run to the supermarket. Louis remembered that Lestat had always loved household supplies. They didn’t eat, and yet Lestat had everything a functional human kitchen needed.
“I don’t have a costume for tomorrow. Get me a classic vampire?” Louis texted back, and when Lestat didn’t answer immediately, he figured he was probably too distracted by a china set.
Louis finally turned the key, his suitcase dragging behind him. He hadn’t packed much. He didn’t want to stay long. He shouldn’t stay long... and yet.
He was overwhelmed by the full view of Lestat’s place. He knew every room from walking through the place with Lestat during their online chats, but seeing it in person was completely different. It was warm, filled with oranges, reds, and dark browns. The walls were covered with paintings and photographs. Nothing necessarily matched, but it was all beautiful and full of life and lestatisms. Louis walked around, his fingers sliding across the piano lid. Music sheets were scattered all over it. Montreal or Rue Royale some things never changed.
He breathed in the faint scent of Lestat’s perfume that still lingered in the air. The balcony door was open, and he could hear people talking outside. It was a busy neighborhood. Louis stepped onto the balcony and leaned against the railing, watching the movement below.
This is a lovely home.
He missed this place despite never having set foot in it before. He longed for all the memories he could have made there with Lestat.
The buzz of his phone brought him back to reality.
“Only kids' costumes here. We’ll pick something from my closet.”
The idea of picking something from Lestat’s closet—for Halloween or any other occasion—was terrifying for Louis to say the least.
Louis decided to wait for Lestat before exploring the other rooms. A few minutes later, Lestat walked in wearing sunglasses, ripped jeans, and a black sweater. His hair was tied back in a loose ponytail, and he carried several plastic bags. He looked cozy, but even at his most casual, he was still striking. Louis had the urge to check himself. He was a bit overdressed, wearing a dark blue suit with a beige shirt underneath.
Lestat was placing the groceries on the kitchen counter, complaining about his neighbors’ noisy Halloween makeover, when he finally took off his glasses and looked at Louis.
“Sorry for my rambling. Did you have a good flight?”
“It was okay. I mean... it was a private jet,” Louis answered cheekily.
Lestat nodded.
His eyes drifted to Louis’s small suitcase beside the couch.
“You can stay for as long as you need,” Lestat assured him.
Louis could hear the concern in his voice. He wasn’t leaving. He had asked to come. It was his idea to stay in his place. Looking at Lestat now, there wasn’t anywhere else in the world he wanted to be.
Instead, he said,
“Um... I pack very light. Besides, you mentioned getting something from your closet...” he said, trying to lighten the mood.
It worked. A smile spread across Lestat’s face.
“Well, you can take anything you like. You know I tend to be a little more extravagant...”
Louis nodded at the understatement.
“But I have a little bit of everything.”
Lestat started unpacking the plastic bags. There were a few Halloween decorations, but mostly enormous amounts of assorted candy.
“I have no idea what kids are into these days. It all probably tastes the same after eating a dozen.”
Louis faintly remembered the taste of candy. When he was human, there wasn’t the variety there was nowadays, but the sugar rush was impossible to forget. He stepped closer to Lestat and helped him empty the remaining bags. Lestat examined each candy with genuine amusement, fascinated by their different shapes and colors.
“This one is supposed to imitate a witch’s drool,” he said, handing the candy to Louis so he could take a look.
“Did you have candy when you were human?”
The question caught Lestat by surprise. He paused, searching for the memory. Louis worried he might have upset him, but Lestat actually seemed quite tickled.
“Are you calling me an old man, Louis?” Lestat teased raising the brat brow.
Louis threw his hands into the air.
“I’m legit curious.”
Lestat began sorting the candy into two bowls on the counter—one for chocolate and the other for assorted sweets. Louis followed along, helping him.
“Not really. I remember having marmalade on special occasions. The flavor was a bit overwhelming, but I did like the texture.”
“You would have loved ice cream.”
Louis placed the last chocolate into the bowl.
Lestat smiled satisfied with his Halloween mission accomplished. They gazed at each other a little longer than either of them expected.
“Um...I’m going to take your luggage to the guest room. You can unwind while I put these decorations out in the hallway.”
The guest room was missing a painting on the wall indeed, but other than that, the place was pristine. Lestat had ordered a custom-made coffin for Louis with a Hästens mattress. Louis didn’t have the courage to tell him that he didn’t like sleeping in coffins anymore unless he absolutely had to. Since Lestat’s windows had no UV protection, he had no alternative. Besides, Lestat had put so much effort into making him comfortable that it was endearing.
Lestat showed him every detail of the room and seemed eager for Louis to try the coffin. Louis was reluctant to climb inside, but he agreed, if only to put Lestat’s mind at ease.
Louis lay down in the coffin, and it felt like lying on clouds.
“Is it good?” Lestat asked, standing beside him with his hands on his hips, waiting for his answer.
Louis remembered a time when neither of them could sleep unless they were curled up together in the same coffin. He fought the urge to ask Lestat to join him.
“It’s wonderful, Lestat...” he said, already sitting up. Lestat offered him a hand to help him out of the coffin. “Really. Thank you.”
Lestat looked genuinely pleased.
“I’ll leave you to unpack. The wardrobe has been serving as temporary storage for my merch, so there are a few products and shirts waiting to be approved. But there’s definitely room for your things. Well... I have decorations to put up. I’m winning the best Halloween door this year. I won’t accept losing to my tedious neighbor again.”
“I know you won’t,” Louis replied with a nod, as if reassuring him that he could leave without worrying.
Louis unpacked his things onto the bed beside the coffin and went to the bathroom to take a shower. He could hear muffled music coming from the living room. The water was hot, and he couldn’t even remember the last time he had felt this relaxed in a shower.
He knew the following night was going to be difficult.
He should cancel it.
They still had hours to decide.
They had to.
Louis glanced at the hair products and soaps Lestat had left for him. As he lathered the soap over his body, his mind began filling the empty space in the shower with phantom limbs. He imagined Lestat behind him, kissing the back of his neck, his hands firmly around Louis’s waist and then moving lower. The water and his lips trailing down the curve of his body, devouring him.
Louis began stroking his cock, almost able to feel Lestat’s tongue inside him. He was right there. Only a few walls separated them. Louis knew he could walk out of the bathroom naked and dripping wet, ask Lestat to fuck him, and Lestat would.
But he couldn’t.
Time.
They needed time.
Louis squeezed out a little more soap on his hand and stroked himself faster. Lestat’s fangs against his neck while his hand wrapped completely around Louis’s throat. Louis started fingering himself with his other hand, he was aching for Lestat’s cock inside of him.
He imagined the two of them lying naked together inside that coffin, candy wrappers scattered around them. Lestat laughing as they rode a sugar high. Lestat kissing him. He missed Lestat’s kisses the most.
He had always kissed him as though it were both the beginning and the end of the world.
As if Louis was the only thing that mattered.
Always.
Louis came hard, blood running down his thighs and staining the bathroom tiles. He remembered the last time Lemuel had fucked him. He had still been recovering afterward, his legs feeling like liquid.
Last week. A good fuck. Fifteen minutes. Lemuel went back to his laptop and had a smoke right after.
Lestat’s memory always won. From the San Francisco boys to the cruising hook ups.
Just imagining Lestat touching him again made Louis wonder why he had ever needed anyone else’s touch.
Louis stepped out of the bathroom, wondering whether he had taken too long. He could no longer hear music coming from the living room. Lestat was probably still outside.
He opened the wardrobe, and it really was overflowing with different types of merch. Louis picked up a mug featuring a very slutty picture of Lestat. Then he found a black T-shirt with a simple purple "VV" logo. It was cute. He wasn’t sure why Lestat had rejected this design.
“Well... this is technically mine,” he murmured as he unfolded the shirt, an idea already forming.
Louis looked at his silk pajamas folded on the bed and decided he wasn’t going to wear them. Lestat’s T-shirt looked much more comfortable, and he wanted to indulge him by accepting this small gift after being such a gracious host (and for giving him the best orgasm he’d had in years, though Lestat didn’t know that... yet).
Louis shushed the little devil on his shoulder, pulled on Lestat’s shirt along with a pair of gray sweatpants, and listened as Lestat skipped through songs in the living room. He had probably finished putting up the Halloween decorations.
Louis left the guest room and found Lestat standing by the record player, placing a vinyl on the turntable.
“That’s a nice little corner you have there,” Louis greeted him.
Lestat turned around to face him and immediately froze, his eyes lingering on Louis’s shirt.
“This one’s cool. Why didn’t you approve it?” Louis asked, pulling lightly at the fabric to look at the purple "VV" logo again.
He could have sworn Lestat was almost blushing.
His hair was fluffy, probably from putting up the decorations outside. The evening was still warm, even though it was autumn.
“I think this one got lost in the middle of the bad designs... It looks good on you,” Lestat replied with a nod, clearing his throat.
The opening piano notes of Ella Fitzgerald’s You Go to My Head drifted through the apartment. Sometimes Louis thought Lestat really could read his mind and had simply lied about it all these years.
“There’s fresh blood in the fridge if you’re hungry. I’m going to take a shower, and I was thinking we could watch a movie afterward?”
Lestat sounded unusually shy—a side of him Louis hadn’t seen in years. He kept glancing at Louis’s chest, as though he still couldn’t quite believe Louis was actually wearing a Vampire Lestat T-shirt.
“Sounds good,” Louis replied simply. “I’ll see what else you have in here.”
He broke the growing tension by browsing through Lestat’s record collection.
“Please. Play whatever you want,” Lestat said before disappearing down the hallway.
Louis stepped outside to admire Lestat’s Halloween decorations. He had really put effort into them. His door was easily the best in the building.
Back inside, Louis wandered over to the bookshelves and picked a book before settling onto the couch. It was an old edition of Leaves of Grass by Walt Whitman, tucked away among much newer books. He also noticed that Lestat’s coffee table looked like someone on all fours and there was butthole draw on it.
He laughed.
He loved this apartment.
He never wanted to leave it.
Louis opened the book to a random page, and his eyes settled on the first poem he found.
Was it doubted that those who corrupt their own bodies conceal themselves?
And if those who defile the living are as bad as they who defile the dead?
And if the body does not do fully as much as the soul?
And if the body were not the soul, what is the soul?
Acoustic guitar chords gradually drifted into the room. They grew louder as Louis slowly woke.He opened his eyes. The book was still resting on his stomach.
Lestat sat in the lounge chair beside the balcony doors, absentmindedly strumming his guitar. A record sleeve and several sheets of music lay at his feet. He was quietly singing to himself.
He stopped the moment he realized Louis was awake.
“Sorry to wake you. You were so deeply asleep I thought nothing could wake you.”
“What time is it?” Louis asked, rubbing the sleep from his eyes as he sat up.
“Almost 4:30 a.m.”
Lestat laughed at Louis’s sleepy expression. Louis was startled at the realization that dawn was already approaching.
“You should have woken me.”
He folded his arms against the sudden chill drifting through the open balcony door before pulling over a chair to sit beside Lestat.
Lestat continued absentmindedly playing a few chords, humming under his breath. Louis glanced at the record sleeve resting on the lounge chair. Jeff Buckley. It looked old. But it didn’t seem like an official release.
The plain white sleeve simply read, in handwritten blue letters:
All Flowers in Time Bend Towards the Sun – Demo
“You’re holding a record that doesn’t exist,” Lestat said, finally setting the guitar aside.
“I’m the only person who has this recording. Are you familiar with Mr. Buckley?”
“I know all the sad boys who sing and play guitar,” Louis replied.
Lestat chuckled. They sat together in silence, listening to the song.
It was acoustic and sparsely produced. The rawness of the demo only made it more intimate. A burst of laughter lingered in the background, and the woman's voice pierced Louis's soul the moment she began to sing.
It sounded like nothing more than two people making music together in a studio.
My eyes are a baptism
Oh I am fuse
I'm singing into my thoughts
Oh phantom elusive thing
Oh, all flowers in time bend towards the sun
I know you say that there's no one for you
But here is one
All flowers in time bend towards the sun
I know you say that there's no one for you
But here is one, here is one
They continued listening to the song in silence, paying close attention to the lyrics while carefully avoiding each other's gaze, until Lestat finally broke the silence.
“Elizabeth Fraser, from Cocteau Twins, and Jeff Buckley had a brief affair. They were in love when they recorded this demo. They never got the chance to finish it, so it never saw the light of day... at least not officially. I’ve never heard another song that captures the fog of love so perfectly...that feeling of being completely surrounded by love just before heartbreak and you just can’t remember, how you felt before”
Louis kept his eyes on Lestat and he held his gaze. Lestat let out a quiet chuckle before finally looking away.
“At least they have this memory,” he said softly. “Frozen in time.”
The song ended with Jeff and Elizabeth talking over the final chords. Louis couldn't help feeling that their song had never really been finished.
They should cancel the séance.
They should forget about everything and simply have this.
Lestat gathered the sheets of music from the chair, stood, and placed the guitar back on its stand. Lestat came closer to him and traced the VV on Louis chest with his fingers. Louis felt his whole body getting stiff again, his eyes wondered from Lestat’s mouthto his hips. He face was in front of his crotch. He could just pull him by his hips and drop on his knees.
Lestat shook his head and picked another sheet from the lounge chair. Louis couldn't even pretend to hide his disappointment. He almost gasped loudly.
It was too late to watch the movie.
He wanted to say something.
He had to say something.
Sleep with me.
Don't leave me alone.
“I’m a little tired. The day was hectic, and I should get some rest. I’ll probably be up before you, though.”
Louis remained frozen in his chair.
“Yeah... Good night, Lestat.”
Lestat looked down at him once more.
“Are you sure you want to do this?”
Louis took a deep breath. He didn’t know. He never does.
“No. But I’ll probably change my mind again.”
Lestat nodded and glanced at the narrow strip of dawn peeking through the gap in the balcony curtains.
“Good night, Louis.”
He left the room. His scent still lingered in the air. Louis could feel their hearts beating in sync once again. At least that was comforting enough to carry him into another day's sleep.
They said the first months of the Dark Gift drove every vampire mad with longing for the sunlight.
Louis eyes openning to golden strands of Lestat’s hair all over his face when they used to sleep together in the coffin.
Louis had never stopped longing for the sun.