Chapter Text
Juliette loved her job, the animals that she cared for, the people who brought them in, she even loved the long hours to an extent, but it was days like today that made it all weigh down on her. The patient load had been fully booked and then in the hour before clinic hours were over a pregnant English bulldog having complications came in, then a pixie-bob cat having an acute allergic reaction, AND a box of kittens were abandoned by the back door. Between the team they managed to birth the bulldog litter but the mother was in critical condition, the cat was already in anaphylactic shock and died before treatment could even be started, and the kittens were almost at death's door from neglect. Today couldn't end sooner.
She turned her phone back on as she settled into her car and saw that Nick had written to say he was on a case and not to wait up on him. It would be close to eleven by the time she'd get home, but she had a feeling that he wouldn't be back before she turned in for the night. Spaghetti Tuesday would just have to wait till next week. She couldn't find any energy or urge to feel any resentment or worry, not at the moment and less and less as the weeks went by.
She knew when they got together that their relationship would not be the smoothest and that she would always have to be in the dark to certain aspects of his work. But Nick had always been open about everything else about his life, and he'd been able to keep work mostly separate from their home life. They'd been happy and strong throughout all the ups and downs.
Then Nick's Aunt Marie died, and everything changed. Nick didn't want to talk about it; and that was fine, he could grieve however he needed to. Juliette gave him his space but he retreated further into it the longer time went by. Then he picked up more hours and cases, working sixteen plus hour days without a word of warning; most notable was their anniversary, which Nick had never explained other than he was on a case. That seemed to be his answer to everything these days. She had tried to bring up a couple of times that maybe he was still grieving, but anything concerning Aunt Marie was emphatically off limits; he closed down and changed the topic after first looking guilty. That was what was getting to her the most, his guilt. She could understand if he felt guilty about work, or missing anniversaries, but he would get this look at the strangest times, like he was caught in the act and then when he realized that she had no idea what just happened that he'd just kicked a puppy. And she really needed to go to bed because that line of thought clearly derailed.
12:00AM was when she finally burrowed into bed, Nick still absent but he could damn well deal with getting only a couple of hours of sleep, something that she was certainly not going to follow along with. Wait up- her ass.
2:00AM was when the bed dipped beside her. She snuffled awake long enough to grumble and drop back to sleep.
4:00AM was when she was ripped awake by agonizing screams. She jerked upright with her heart in her throat and a hand reaching for the nearest weapon, which apparently was the phone, which she was in mid swing to throw it at- Nick who was running into the bathroom.
"What is it?" she called after him and jumped up to follow. The door slammed shut and she heard it lock. "Nick? What the hell, are you ok?" The water started running but she could still hear Nick hyperventilating. "Damn it, Nick, are you ok?!" She started to run through possible injuries and what she would possibly need. She didn't get a good look at him but she didn't see any obvious blood. It sounded like the shower was running. "Nick, I'm coming in, ok?" There was no reply so she turned back to the room in search of something to push through the doorknob, she could push the latch but there wasn't anything near that would fit. A bobby pin folded open barely fit but it got the door open. Nick was standing in the shower in his sweatpants furiously scrubbing at his hair and face with his hands.
"Nick, what is wrong," she said slowly and carefully approached him.
"It's everywhere!" He yelled, not stopping in his attempts to remove whatever was on him. There didn't appear to be anything actually on him and she was starting to believe that he was either drugged or possibly in the midst of a nightmare.
"Nick, there isn't anything on you. You're ok." Nick stopped his frantic motions and turned towards her, a look of hopeful astonishment on his face.
"Juliette, oh god you're ok." He stepped out of the tub, leaving the water running and dripping water everywhere. He hugged her tight, soaking her through. She hugged him back while murmuring comfort.
"Come on hon, let's dry you off and sit you down and we can figure out what's going on." He nodded against her shoulder. She sat him on the closed toilet and turned off the shower. He stayed hunched and silent as she got him dried off, into dry clothes and sat down on the bed. As she had thought, there weren't any foreign substances or visible wounds on him, though his pulse and respiratory rate were still running fast. That coupled with his pupils still being fairly dilated in the light of the bedroom could mean he was under the effect of some drug or he was still terrified. Either seemed plausible at the moment. Thankfully his pupils were responsive and as the minutes went by he seemed to be able to focus better.
Nick rubbed at his face, “I’m fine, just give me a minute,” he said through his fingers. He sucked in a breath and dropped his hands. Meeting her eyes he smiled, thinly, "I'm fine now."
"What was that?" She asked, calmly but firmly.
"Just a really, really bad dream and I got a little confused."
"Just a little? Hon, you were screaming and ran to the shower."
"I'm fine," he insisted.
"But, Nick, that wasn't just-"
"I'm. Fine."
"Ok, fine." They stayed like that for a few moments, him sitting on the edge of the bed with his hands hanging limply between his knees, and her crouched in front of him. She squeezed his knee and smiled. "Well I don't know about you but I won't be able to go back to sleep any time soon. Want some tea?" He huffed and nodded.
"Yeah. Yeah, that sounds great. Thanks Jules,"
Juliette knew that this wasn't just nothing, knew that he was not over whatever he had just experienced, but Nick did not talk about these things. Nick liked his space and she knew that if she pushed the issue then he would only withdraw and close down more. If he wanted to talk about it then he would in his own time.