Chapter Text
It was surreal going back to Red Hood’s – Jason’s – safe house. Later he remembered it in flashes – swinging after Jason on a grapple line, racing over the old train station, stumbling down a fire ladder to get to street level. Jason fumbling to unlock the door while Tim clung to his arm, as if he might vanish if Tim let go.
“Fucking finally,” Jason muttered when he finally got the door unlocked. And then the door was swinging shut behind them and they collided, flint meeting steel, and Tim was already burning.
Jason’s mouth was hot on his and now he knew that it was because it was Jason – whatever magic or science experiment had brought him back made his skin hot to the touch as he licked into Tim’s mouth, groaning when Tim pressed him against the wall. If he had a fever, it must be contagious, because Tim could feel the flush spreading, suddenly too warm in the empty room.
Jason’s clever fingers found the edges of his domino and he held it so gently in his big hands, like it was made of glass and smiled when Tim blinked up at him. “There you are, birdie.” And Tim was going to lose his mind.
He flung his arms around Jason’s neck, standing on tiptoe, desperate to be closer. Jason set the domino on the counter and hummed into his mouth as his other hand slipped under Tim’s shirt, leaving goose bumps in its wake. Tim sighed, begrudgingly breaking the kiss just long enough for Jason to pull the shirt over Tim’s head. He reached for Jason’s chest plate to return the favor, and Jason went suddenly still.
“It’s not – it’s not pretty, birdie,” he murmured, his shoulders curling in, an instinctive move to hide. A flash of righteous indignation swept through Tim – who dared to make him feel like he came back wrong, like he needed to wear a mask, to cover up.
He cupped Jason’s cheeks with both hands, forcing Jason to look him in the eye. Jason’s eyes glowed that lurid, unnatural green as he blinked down at Tim in surprise. “Jason, look at you,” Tim said, his voice sharp and fierce. “You’re a goddamn miracle.”
Jason stared, jaw slack and Tim softened, running his thumbs along Jason’s cheekbones. “If you don’t want to, we don’t have to,” he said. “But you don’t have to hide from me. I want to see you.”
Jason swallowed, took a deep breath, and then he took Tim’s hands, moved them to the closures of the chest plate. “The top button’s wired,” he said. “It’s the clasp on the right.” Tim’s fingers blindly felt for the clasp, gentle, like he was defusing a bomb – and then he found the catch and the chest plate was falling to the floor with a clatter, revealing a gray t-shirt underneath.
Jason’s chest was rising and falling, too fast and Tim took one of his hands – so big, fuck – and held it to his own chest, putting his other hand on Jason’s chest, just below the collarbone. “It’s ok,” he said softly, making sure to breathe slow and even. “Jason, it’s ok.”
Jason took a deep breath, and then another, and soon they were breathing in sync, slow and steady. Tim smiled up at him. “You’re doing so good.”
Jason let out a whine, and Tim cooed at him, standing on tiptoe again to kiss him, smiling into Jason’s mouth when he felt Jason’s heart speed up.
They kissed so long that Tim had almost forgotten what they were doing, until Jason pulled away, smirking a little when Tim tried to follow him. Tim barely held back a whimper – but then he saw Jason’s hands drop to the hem of his shirt. “Ok, birdie?” he asked, pulling the shirt over his head, revealing warm skin, the soft, shiny scars the bats collected – and then a huge, deep scar, the Y from the autopsy stretching from Jason’s navel to his collarbone.
Tim kept his face blank as he traced the scar with his fingers. The urge to drag the Joker out of whatever morgue fridge he’d been left in and somehow bring him back just to send him to hell all over again was burning in his throat. But the Joker was gone, his ticket to hell already punched, and right now Jason was looking down at him, his face raw and open. Tim looked up at him through his eyelashes as he pressed a kiss to the intersection of the Y and he felt Jason’s breath stutter in his chest.
“Birdie…” he whispered, and Tim hummed, tracing the scar with his mouth, his hands.
“I told you,” he said. “You’re a miracle.”
Jason huffed. “Not sure the Lazarus Pit counts as a miracle,” he said and that – raised some questions Tim was definitely going to ask about later. But for now, he just shook his head.
“I don’t care if it was the fucking Wizard,” he said, and Jason let out a surprised laugh. “It means you’re back. You’re here.”
“Fuck, birdie, you can’t just say shit like that. I’ll start to get ideas,” Jason said with a grin that wasn’t quite convincing.
“Have all the ideas you want,” Tim said. “I have a few too.”
Jason raised an eyebrow. “Oh yeah?” he asked, his voice a low rumble that had arousal pooling in Tim’s belly.
“Yeah,” he said, pulling Jason down into a dirty kiss. Jason hummed into Tim’s mouth, pulling him closer, until they were chest to chest. Tim was desperate, almost frantic already, and he tangled his fingers in Jason’s curls. Jason scooped him up and Tim’s stomach swooped, like tripping on the stairs in the dark.
He wrapped his legs around Jason’s hips and Jason caught his knee, pulling Tim impossibly closer and grinding Tim’s cock against Jason’s stomach. Tim let out a wounded keen and Jason swore. “Fuck, birdie, can I – what do you want, tell me what you want…”
Tim’s head was swimming and he had to rest his forehead against Jason’s, panting hard, trying to get oxygen to his muddled brain. “Bathroom,” he muttered against Jason’s cheek and Jason set off, somehow managing to navigate the apartment while Tim sucked on his tongue.
He clicked the light on and Tim tapped his shoulder. Jason set him down, his hand on Tim’s waist, like he couldn’t bear not to touch, and Tim pulled him closer, turning to rest his hands on the counter. He looked back over his shoulder at Jason, eyebrow raised.
Jason bit his bottom lip. “Still thinking about the warehouse, huh?” he asked, and he stepped closer, dragging Tim’s hips flush to his, making Tim moan.
“Yeah, l-I went home and jerked off about it,” he said, his voice way too breathy already, and Jason growled, reaching around and pressing his hand to Tim’s cock. Tim gasped, his head falling back against Jason’s chest, and Jason stroked him over the suit.
“No cup today,” he said, pleased, and Tim flushed.
“I was in a hurry,” he said, trying to avoid looking at his tomato-red face in the mirror.
“Uh huh,” Jason said, like he was only half-listening as he unsnapped Tim’s utility belt – no wonder he’d known how to undo the clasp, that first time – letting it fall to the floor as his hand slipped inside Tim’s boxers.
“Jason,” Tim breathed, and Jason moved his hand slowly, not nearly fast enough to give Tim what he wanted, and this was going to be the end of him for sure.
“Like hearing you say my name,” Jason murmured and Tim’s breath caught in his throat. “Felt like shit, that I knew your name but you didn’t know mine.”
“Say my name,” Tim said – begged, really – which should have been embarrassing, but he was too far gone to care.
“Tim,” Jason whispered into his ear, leaving a bruising kiss on the sensitive spot by the hinge of his jaw, and Tim let out a little hiccuping breath. He could feel Jason’s smile against his skin. “Tim, you’re so pretty, baby. Look at you.”
Tim blinked, trying to make his eyes focus on the mirror – and then he saw, Jason looking back at him, his gaze scorching, and then his own face – eyes half-lidded, cheeks flushed, hair mussed. He looked fucked out already. Jason’s shoulders were so broad behind him, his hands so big against Tim’s hip, his belly that it made him blush even harder.
“Jason,” he whined – he couldn’t even pretend it wasn’t a whine – and Jason tilted his chin up, kissing him deeply.
“You want it, baby?” Jason asked, his grin widening when Tim nodded helplessly. “Here,” Jason said, guiding Tim down so he was leaning on his elbows on the counter. “I’ll be right back,” he murmured, disappearing into the hallway, and Tim did his best to steady his breathing and avoid eye contact with his reflection in the mirror.
Jason reappeared with a bottle of lube in one hand. He’d lost the tac pants and the jockstrap, and Tim couldn’t take his eyes off the reflection of Jason’s cock in the mirror, the perfect curve and glint of pre at the tip. Jason caught him staring and grinned. “Like what you see?”
Tim rolled his eyes and Jason laughed, bending over Tim to cage him in, reaching around to undo the suit and help Tim struggle out of it. Jason wrapped his hand around Tim’s cock and gave a few lazy strokes, and Tim closed his eyes. The anticipation was going to kill him.
“Jason, please,” he pleaded, and Jason cooed at him, and then finally – finally! – uncapped the lube and let it drip over his fingers. The first touch was so good he could cry – and then Jason’s finger was inside him, lighting up every one of his nerve endings. “Oh-h fuck. Jay,” he keened and Jason tilted his chin up and licked into his mouth as the next finger pressed inside and Tim flinched, his teeth knocking against Jason’s lip.
He tasted iron on his tongue and licked Jason’s lip as an apology. “Sorry, sorry,” he said, and Jason laughed.
“Nothing to be sorry for, baby bird,” and Tim groaned, deep in his chest. “You like it when I call you that?”
“Yeah,” Tim whined, embarrassingly honest, and Jason hummed, adding another finger and curling them just so. “Ah –” Tim gasped and Jason whispered That’s it baby, moving his fingers in tiny circles that had Tim panting so hard it started to fog up the mirror.
“Jaaaaay,” he whimpered. “Fuck me, please. Wanna come on your cock.”
Jason’s eyes were so dark, the blue-green a tiny ring around the black now. “Jesus Christ, birdie,” he whispered, reverent. “Can’t believe you’re real.” He opened one of the drawers, rummaging for something, and Tim could not give less of a fuck about whatever he was looking for. Jason chuckled, leaning in to kiss his pouting mouth.
“Gotta find the condoms, baby, they should be here somewhere…”
“But --” Tim started, and then he flushed. Jason’s fingers froze inside him, and Tim was going to lose his mind.
“But what, baby?” Jason asked softly and Tim decided to bite the metaphorical bullet.
“Iwantyoutocomeinsideme,” he said in a rush, like if he said it fast he could beat the mortification, more vulnerable than closing his eyes while Jason sucked his cock.
Jason’s inhale hissed through his teeth. “Birdie…”
“I’m clean,” Tim said, stubborn. “I know you’re clean, Leslie wouldn’t let you leave the clinic without doing blood work.” And Jason laughed.
“I forgot you’re a stalker,” he said, amused and Tim almost went boneless in relief. “You need it that bad, huh?”
“I’ve been – thinking about it,” Tim admitted, really incriminating himself now. “After the warehouse, I had to listen to Damian try to boss Dick around with your come on my thighs. It made me fucking crazy…
“Jesus fuck,” Jason murmured. “I wanted to fuck you so bad, but I couldn’t, not like that. Not when you didn’t know it was me.” He pressed a kiss to Tim’s burning cheek, his fingers curling again and dragging a moan from Tim’s throat.
“Wanted you to,” Tim said helplessly. “Want you to, Jay, come on…”
“Ok, ok,” Jason mumbled, and then he was slicking up his cock and notching the head to Tim’s entrance. He clutched Tim’s hips and pushed inside, maddeningly slow, forcing every single thought out of Tim’s head. Someone was moaning so loud it echoed off the bathroom tile – Tim would have been mortified if he had been able to think about anything but Jason’s cock, lighting him up from the inside out, carving a space for himself inside Tim’s body.
“Fuck, Tim,” Jason groaned and Tim keened helplessly, scrabbling uselessly for purchase on the counter.
“Jay,” he breathed, and Jason’s hand snuck under his chest, guiding him up until his back was to Jason’s chest.
“There you go, baby,” Jason whispered into his hair and Tim’s breath hitched in his chest. “God, look at you.”
Tim couldn’t do anything but look – at his red, blotchy cheeks, his kiss-bitten mouth, his chest heaving with every ragged breath, the smear of pre on his belly, the way Jason took all his weight. All his defenses had been wiped away, and the need was naked on his face, raw and open and honest. He took another shuddering breath and it ached, like his chest had split open for everyone to see. It would have been too much if Jason didn’t look as wrecked as he did. His eyes met Tim’s in the mirror with the same desperation, and Tim keened as Jason’s arm tightened around his chest, pulling Tim’s hips impossibly closer.
“Can’t believe I get to have you like this,” Jason panted in his ear. “Can’t believe I get to touch you – Tim, baby, sweetheart –”
A sob tore through Tim’s throat, and he could feel a tear run down his cheek, the pleasure spilling over, so big his body couldn’t contain it. “Jay, I’m close –” he whimpered, and Jason swore under his breath, reaching down to wrap his hand around Tim’s cock.
“You’re like a dream,” Jason murmured. “You’re so good, baby, so fucking good to me –” and Tim cried out Jason, his vision whiting out as the dam burst, flooding his senses until there was nothing but him and Jason, tangled together. He distantly heard Jason say “Oh god, Tim,” and then he felt Jason’s cock throb inside him, pressing even deeper and sending another thrill of pleasure through his veins.
He drifted, nuzzling into Jason’s chest while Jason cleaned him up with a soft, wet cloth. “How’re you feelin’, baby?” Jason murmured and Tim hummed.
“I feel great,” he said, blinking in the bathroom light. He didn’t remember closing his eyes. “I don’t think my legs work though.”
Jason huffed out a laugh. “I can help with that,” he said, scooping Tim up and carrying him to bed.
Tim melted into the pillows and Jason ran his fingers through Tim’s hair, then kissed Tim’s tear-stained cheek. “I wasn’t too rough, was I?”
“No,” Tim said, propping himself up on his elbows and tugging Jason in for a kiss. “Jay, you were perfect.”
Jason smiled, warm like the sunrise, and let Tim pull him down to sprawl out on the bed next to him. Jason curled around him, his arm draped over Tim’s hip, and Tim sighed out dreamily. They both dozed for a bit, until Tim’s communicator started buzzing so hard it was vibrating against the bathroom tile.
“Ugh, Bruce,” Tim groaned, throwing his arm over his face.
“This has been a weird fucking day,” Jason said and Tim burst out laughing, cause – yeah. Talk about an understatement. “I still can’t believe you quoted Wicked to Bruce,” Jason said, and Tim huffed.
“Well, it was our code phrase,” he said, humming when Jason’s fingers started combing through his hair.
“Why’d you have a code phrase with Bruce?” Jason asked. Tim took a deep breath.
“After you were gone, Bruce didn’t… take it well,” he said. “He was less careful, more erratic. He started sending more people to the hospital. Once he had a meltdown on patrol and nearly wrecked the Batmobile.”
Jason frowned. “But how did you know that? Were you even Robin yet?”
Tim bit his lip. “So… remember that annoying kid, who kept following you and Bruce? Taking pictures?”
Jason went very still beside him. “That was you?”
“Yeah,” Tim said, a nervous squirming in his belly – and then Jason laughed, so hard that tears ran down his cheeks.
“Shoulda known,” he finally gasped. “The way you followed me around the Bowery all the damn time. You were a child prodigy.”
“Ok, it’s not that funny,” Tim said, but he laughed despite himself when Jason started giggling again.
“It really, really is, baby bird,” he said, and Tim rolled his eyes, fighting back a smile.
“Well, since I was such a good stalker, I saw Bruce unraveling. It got… bad,” Tim said. “So one day I followed him back to the cave and volunteered to be Robin.”
“But I still don’t understand,” Jason said. “What was the code phrase for?”
“It was Alfred’s idea,” Tim said. “If Bruce started lashing out, or melting down, the code phrase was the sign that he needed to go back to the cave.”
“So he’d what – just leave you there?” Jason asked. “How old were you?”
“...Twelve? Thirteen?” Tim said, and Jason sat up, his jaw tight.
“You were his fucking babysitter when you were TWELVE? What the hell was Alfred thinking?”
Tim fidgeted with the sheet. “No one else was doing anything,” he said. “Somebody had to.”
“But that somebody shouldn’t have been you,” Jason said, his voice low and insistent. “After what happened to me, why didn’t he stop? Why’d he have another Robin?”
Tim blinked. The decision that had seemed so logical, so irrefutable when he was twelve suddenly sounded ridiculous when Jason said it like that. “I don’t know,” he murmured.
“I can’t believe he made you responsible for his meltdowns. All that, to protect the psychopath who killed me?” Jason said his voice rising, and Tim wrapped an arm around him. “What a piece of shit,” Jason said, his voice breaking, scrubbing at his eyes.
“I know,” Tim said, leaning in to kiss his shoulder. What else was there to say?
Jason let out a hiccuping laugh. “What a fucking joke,” he said. “He couldn’t even face me himself. For months. He was still hiding behind you.”
Tim blinked. “Well… he didn’t exactly know. About me meeting you,” he admitted, and Jason looked up at him, startled.
“Wait, he really didn’t know? At all?”
Tim shook his head. “He was determined to figure it out for himself, so I just… did what I wanted while he wasn’t paying attention.” Jason just stared, and Tim was still talking for some reason. “I’ve gotten pretty good at that over the years. I had a lot of practice.”
Jason’s brow was still furrowed, and Tim literally had to bite his lip so he would shut up for once in his life. And then Jason laughed, a deep belly laugh, and it was Tim’s turn to frown in confusion.
“Oooh, I bet you gave him a run for his money,” Jason said, between gasps. “Dick got fed up with Bruce bossing him around, and I was just trying desperately to keep up, but you – you just ignored him and did whatever the fuck you wanted.”
Tim huffed out a laugh, shaking his head, and Jason poked his cheek. “You might’ve been the smartest out of all of us,” he murmured. “You kept secrets from Bruce Wayne.”
“You did too,” Tim said. “It drove him fucking crazy, that he couldn’t figure out who you were. He kept saying it was ‘like you appeared out of thin air.’”
“Well, that’s something,” Jason said, a sly smile stealing across his face. “Managed to pull one over on Batman.” He bumped his shoulder against Tim’s. “You would’ve figured it out though. You would’ve guessed it was me.”
Tim hummed. “I remember that first time we met on the roof – something about you felt familiar. I thought it was just the League training, but it was something else too.” He leaned into Jason, letting him hold his weight. “I don’t know if I would have guessed it was you though. I kind of already cashed in my delusional ‘he’s not really dead’ card when I went looking for Bruce.”
Jason closed his eyes, took a deep breath. “Of course you did,” he said, resigned. But then he smirked. “You figured out I was lactose intolerant though. I still don’t know how the fuck you did that.”
Tim hooked his chin over Jason’s shoulder. “Remember that time your bag of groceries split open and spilled all over down by Edison Street?”
It was quiet for one heartbeat, two, and then – “Are you serious?” Jason laughed. “I didn’t even see you, how the fuck –”
Tim leaned in, kissing the laughter out of Jason’s mouth, and Jason tangled his fingers in Tim’s hair. He was sure Jason had a million questions – he had so many questions, they were swirling around in the back of his mind like a murmuration of birds. But they would have time to talk about that later, he decided, as Jason’s tongue ran along his bottom lip. He deepened the kiss, letting Jason in. Letting Jason claim him, devour him.
Who knows, maybe he would eventually take Jason up on his job offer. Crazier things had happened.