Chapter Text
The second Izuku opened his eyes, he immediately wanted to go back to sleep. The lights were too bright, and his head was killing him. Izuku groaned and tried to pull up his blanket over his eyes, but he found that he couldn’t. He couldn’t move.
Izuku gasped and shot his eyes open, alarmed, when he realized that his arms were in casts — No, almost his entire body was. His body hurt, barely numbed out by the morphine dripping into his veins. The heart monitor beeped wildly at his panic.
Where was he? In the hospital. What happened? Villain attack. Where was Kacchan? Where was his Kacchan?
A nurse came rushing in. “Midoriya-san!” She was saying. “Calm down, calm down. You’re okay, Midoriya-san. You’re in the hospital.”
“I— I know that!” Izuku tried to sit up, but the nurse pushed him back down. “No! I need to find Kacchan! Where is he?”
“Kacchan?”
“Yes, Kacchan! Kac— B-Bakugou Katsuki. Katsuki, please, where is he, he was with me and— and I don’t remember—”
“Bakugou Katsuki is fine. He was released three days ago, okay? Now, Midoriya-san, please, you’re going to rip your stitches.”
“Three—” Izuku gaped at her. “Three days ago?”
The nurse paused, a pained expression on her face. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I’m going to page Dr. Shuzenji now, okay? She needs to take a look at you.”
“Where’s Kacchan?” He whimpered, but she didn’t answer him. “Where’s Kacchan? Where is he?”
The door opened, and Recovery Girl came rushing inside. The old doctor released a sigh of relief when she saw him, and she ushered the nurse to leave. When the door closed behind her, Recovery Girl took off her glasses and sighed, rubbing her head.
“Where’s Kacchan?”
“You never learn, do you, boy?”
“ Please , where’s Kacchan?” Izuku sobbed.
“He’s not here.” Recovery Girl looked at him, tired. “As he shouldn’t be.”
“Where’s my mom?”
“Damn you, boy, haven’t you had enough ?” Recovery Girl yelled suddenly, banging her cane against the floor until it almost splintered. Izuku flinched. Recovery Girl pointed the end of her cane at him and continued in a low, angry voice, “I will heal you. I will call Yagi to come pick you up. And I do not want to see you here again for a long, long time, do you hear me?”
“Recovery Girl…” Izuku whispered, barely a breath. “How long?”
She shook her head and put her glasses back on. She straightened her coat and said, “Five days.”
Five days. Five days. Five days, five days, five days, over and over again. Izuku repeated those two words not until they lost meaning, because he couldn’t find any meaning at all in the first place. Five days.
He’d been in a coma for five days.
The days didn't come back to him. Not the haze of a dream. Not the faint whisper of someone calling his name. Not an angry curse from someone next to him. What did come back to him, however, were the last few seconds before he blacked out. He was thrown in the air. Too fast. Too far. He was touching the clouds. And then he was falling, falling, sailing straight through the glass wall of a skyscraper. And then, nothing.
Izuku blinked, looked at the blanket on his chest, his bandaged arms, and said, "Is Kacchan outside?"
Recovery Girl was checking his heartbeat and vitals.
"Is Kacchan outside?"
"I told you he's not."
"But he was here."
"No."
"What do you mean 'no'?" Izuku asked, a little too loudly, a little more than anxious. "We came together, didn't we? He knows I'm here, doesn't he?"
Recovery Girl's lips touched his cheek, but he pushed her away before her Quirk could do its job. " Please ," he begged, looking at her like he was lost at sea and she was the helicopter shining a flashlight at him. Saving, but at the same time accusatory. "Please, Recovery Girl."
A pause. "He knows you're here," she started slowly. "He was here, too, for awhile. Recovering. Lost a lot of blood, that stupid boy. He was alright after two days." Another pause, then a sigh. She looked at him, but through the accusatory flashlights she was shining at him, there was a sliver of pity. "He didn't come back after he got discharged."
Izuku blinked. Then, he scoffed. "That's not true. Of course he would've come back. He'd have visited me."
Recovery Girl shook her head and took his jaw in her small hands. "Midoriya, please."
"No!" Izuku exclaimed. "He had three days. To see me. Not to mention the two that he probably spent being an ass and demanding to be let in here. That's how Kacchan is. He's stubborn and loud and always wants what he wants a-and he c-cares, he cares about me. He wouldn't… He would've…"
Recovery Girl opened her mouth, but no words left her, and she merely looked away from his pleading eyes. When she did eventually find her words, she merely said, "I'm sorry."
Izuku was… was baffled. He wasn't angry or sad or disappointed. His head wasn't capable yet of wrapping around such a big, unthinkable idea. He couldn't imagine how his Kacchan wasn't at the door at this very second. He had half a mind to call out his name, but Recovery Girl spoke before he could.
"He didn't visit you. Some of your friends did, though, and your mother and Yagi did, too, if that's any consolation. Poor Inko didn't sleep for over 48 hours. They're at home now, after I shooed them off so they could get some damn sleep. Turns out I chose a pretty bad time to do that. I'll have to call and wake them up." Recovery Girl jumped down from her stool and made her way to the door. "Do not break anything while I do that, boy. And I don't mean the hospital equipment."
The door shut. The heart monitor beeped. He breathed in, and realized he was alone.
Izuku slowly relaxed against the bed. When his eyes opened, he saw fluorescent lights. When they closed, he saw Kacchan slumped on the road with blood all over him.
“Kacchan…” He whispered, and tried to get up again. Pain flared in his arms and torso, but he persisted until, with great effort, he sat up and swung his legs over the edge of the bed. He was panting and sweating, and frankly a little nauseous, but he needed to find Kacchan.
He leaned forward and promptly collapsed to the floor.
The door was immediately thrown open, and the next thing Izuku knew, Recovery Girl was screaming and beating him with her cane, all the while All Might and his mom were yelling incomprehensibly through Recovery Girl's phone speaker.
The next time Izuku opened his eyes, he was in the car with his parents.
It was still dark. He'd woken up at around 1 A.M., and now it was 3 A.M. Two hours felt like a second. To him, at least, in his state of insensibility. To everyone around him, it must've felt like an endless eternity. An eternity of him gone.
Izuku timidly looked up and saw All Might driving and his mom looking out the window. All was silent until he chanced to speak. "Thank you," he started. "For… picking me up so late."
The two said nothing for an agonizingly long time. "Don't thank us," his mom finally spoke, but her voice was strained. It was like she was recovering from a very bad sore throat. "We're your parents, Izuku."
Izuku stared at the back of her head, then at All Might. The old hero said nothing still.
"I'm sorry."
All Might suddenly hit the brakes.
Izuku and Inko gasped, but their seatbelts held them steady. All Might unbuckled his, climbed out of the car, and slammed the door shut behind him.
Izuku was frozen in place, unsure of what to think. He’d never seen his mentor like this before. Outside, All Might was pacing, back and forth, quick, desperate. He had his hands in his pockets, then over his eyes, then on his hips. At one point, he stopped pacing, but he didn't move to come inside the car. He just stood there, motionless, facing the darkness.
A second passed, and then his mother was climbing out of the car, too. “Mom?” Izuku called, but she closed the door on him without a word. She was approaching her fiancé with cautious steps and gentle hands, murmuring words that Izuku couldn’t hear, until All Might folded himself over her and trembled.
Izuku had his hand on the door handle, waiting — waiting for what, he didn’t know, he couldn’t move, didn’t know if he should — but then they were both coming back, and Izuku let go and slumped back against his seat, somehow feeling more exhausted. They continued driving in louder silence.
When they got home, Izuku kissed his mother goodnight, hesitated with All Might before hugging him tightly, and went up to his room. They were going to talk in the morning. Right now, they needed time.
Izuku closed his door and leaned back against it, heaving a sigh and feeling like he was inflating the walls. He was exhausted, ironically, after being asleep for days, and he collapsed into his bed and closed his eyes, intending to sleep and wake up in Kacchan's arms on a Monday morning.
Their date was Sunday. Today was Friday. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday. Plus half the day from Sunday. Plus… Izuku glanced at the clock on the wall. It was 4 A.M. Ah. It wasn’t Friday anymore. It was Saturday. So, plus Friday, and plus a few hours from Saturday. He’d been gone for one hour… two hours… six… forty… one hundred… one hundred and… and… Ah. Ah. Ah...
“Ahhh....” Izuku sobbed, sniffled, and deflated against his pillow. “Ahh… Aaaahhh…” Izuku cried, first a soft whine, and then it gradually built up and up and up until he was trembling on the bed and wailing as loud as he could with a bandaged neck.
He'd been in a coma for five fucking days.
The base of his throat burned, like he'd just been given acid, and he hacked and retched over the side of his bed, but the invisible poison remained in his mouth. It was painful , he was in pain , but the worst part was the knowledge that his Kacchan had to swallow this very same poison for days and days and hundreds of hours while he waited for his reckless ass to come back to life again.
His Kacchan— If Izuku was feeling this much anguish, this much hopelessness, then his Kacchan must've been dying.
He had to get him.
Izuku kicked his blanket off and rolled off the bed in a mess of weak limbs and a frazzled heart. He crawled and stumbled forward until his hand slapped the door and flung it open. As he passed the doorway, he got his feet under him, and he launched himself to the stairs — too quickly, for he was falling and rolling over the steps. Inko and All Might, awake in the living room and calling someone on the phone, jumped at his brutal descent and rushed towards him, but Izuku ducked under their embrace and made for the door.
"IZUKU!" Inko screeched. "IZUKU, WHAT'S GOTTEN INTO YOU !?"
"Kacchan's dying ." Was all Izuku said before he was out the door.
Kacchan— He had to get to his Kacchan, he had to save him.
All Might was suddenly grabbing him and pulling him back. " Izuku !" He yelled, grunting as Izuku wailed and struggled in his hold. "Calm down, calm down, my boy! You're alright, you're safe ."
" Kacchan , I have to see Kacchan !" Izuku cried. "He's waiting, All Might, he's waiting for me, and I have to save him! He's dying , please, please , I need to get to him, All Might!"
"Bakugou knows, son, he knows, alright? Inko called Mitsuki, she knows, and her boy knows. He knows you're safe."
"He needs to see me," Izuku said, shaking his head and sobbing. "I have to hold him, All Might, please, please, please ."
"Young Midoriya…" All Might loosened his hold, and his expression turned regretful. "I don't think… that this is a good time to see him."
"I don't care if it's the middle of the night, All Might, he needs—"
"That's not what I meant. Bakugou is… not well. No, no, his injuries have healed perfectly well, that's not it. I mean he is…not in the right mindset to see you right now."
"What does that even mean !?" Izuku demanded, the bafflement from the hospital creeping in and metamorphosing into something ugly, something frantic. "He didn't visit, he didn't see me , and now you're telling me he still doesn't want to even when I'm here?"
“Yes!” All Might answered. Then, he lowered his voice. “Yes, young Midoriya. So, please, let’s go home. Spare young Bakugou, at least for tonight, alright? Let’s go, my boy.”
“But…” Izuku furrowed his brows. “I don’t… understand…”
“I’m sorry. All will be explained, but for now—”
“No! No, that doesn’t make any sense!” Izuku wrenched himself away from All Might, breathing like the world had lost half its oxygen while he’d been asleep. “I-I’m going to see Kacchan.” He gulped, moving backwards one step at a time. “I’m going .” Izuku stumbled, but when he caught his footing, he made a dash for the Bakugou residence, leaving All Might behind.
When he saw the familiar house, he didn’t have to knock; Mitsuki was there, a phone in her hand, and a small smile on her face. “Izuku, you’re awake!” She said, and her relief was genuine. “Your mom called me earlier. It’s so nice to—”
“Where’s Kacchan?” Izuku interjected, too wound up with anxiety and desperation to give a shit about civility. “I need to see him.”
Mitsuki’s smile fell, replaced with a look that resembled his mom and All Might. She looked like she hadn’t slept in days. She sighed and dropped her face in her hands, sniffling for a second, until she emerged again with a film of glass in her eyes. “I’m sorry, Izuku,” she said. “I tried to talk to him, I really did. But, he’s just— He just can’t tonight, okay, baby? Could—” All of a sudden, there was the sound of something crashing inside the house. Mitsuki flinched, but she didn’t look back. She merely shut her eyes and counted to five. “Could you… come back later, honey? Now’s really not a good time for Katsuki.”
“Was that him?” Izuku tried to peer over her shoulder, but Mitsuki swung the door half-closed.
“Now is really not a good time, Izuku,” Mitsuki repeated, frigid. “Let me walk you back home, okay? Please, your mother’s worried sick.”
“But…” Izuku deflated, confused, hurt. “But Kacchan’s… waiting for me… isn’t he?”
Mitsuki stared at him, and she kept staring until Izuku momentarily wondered if someone had hit the pause button in this fucked up reality. Eventually, Mitsuki stepped forward and locked the door behind her.
“Let’s get you home now.”
“No, wai…” His wrist was held and pulled forward, away, and his body was too stunned to fight back anymore. Izuku followed Mitsuki down the street, and he craned his neck to look back at the house where Kacchan was. He stumbled on a crack on the pavement and lurched forward, and he missed the way the curtains on the second floor shifted.
Inko hit him.
“Don’t ever do that again, Izuku!” Inko screamed, crying hysterically as she brought him into a bone-shattering embrace. “Don’t ever, ever do that again, please , Izuku, my heart can’t take it! How could you! How could you make your mother worry like this, Izuku !”
“I’m—” Izuku hiccuped, the sting on his arm from her previous battering going forgotten. He wrapped his arms loosely around her. “I’m sorry.”
“No, you are not !” Inko cried. “I am tired, Izuku, I am tired , but you don’t think of your mother when you do these things! How can I listen to you saying sorry when you always always always —”
“Love,” All Might whispered, putting a hand on her trembling shoulder. “That’s enough for tonight. We can’t do this right now.”
“Then, when ?” Inko demanded. “When are we going to talk to this boy, Yagi? When is he supposed to stop doing these things and think for himself!?”
“We’re agitated, we’re angry, and we cannot have this conversation, Inko.” All Might squeezed her shoulders. Then, he looked at Izuku. “Go to your room, Young Midoriya.”
“Yagi!”
“Mom, I—”
“Go to your room now !”
Inko screamed something incoherent in All Might’s face, and Izuku stumbled up the stairs. When he closed the door, he closed his eyes and willed himself to wake up, but Inko screamed again, muffled now but painstaking no less, and Izuku turned the lock. He felt like he’d reverted back to being four years old as he crawled over his bed and hid himself under the blankets, praying to no entity in particular that his parents would stop fighting. When his mom screamed again, Izuku fumbled to get his phone from the nightstand, only to realize that he’d busted it from his previous fight.
“Shit…” He muttered. He wanted to text Kacchan. Wanted to talk to him. Wanted to not feel alone.
It made Izuku wonder how his Kacchan had felt. He couldn’t text him either, during the five or so days he’d been out of commission. Did he feel this lonely, too? Did he curl under his blanket like a four year old, too? Did he miss him, too? Izuku missed him dearly, and he’d only been awake for a few hours.
His mind entertained the idea of sneaking through his window, but the sound of a smashing plate deterred him. He merely pulled the blanket tighter around him and closed his eyes.
Morning finally came, and Izuku did not sleep at all. Neither did his parents, he realized as he timidly entered the living room and found Inko and All Might sitting on the couch, a vast chasm between them, literally and figuratively — he’d never seen them sit so far apart from each other. Inko was the closest to the doorway, and when she saw him, she tried to smile, but it looked physically painful.
“Good morning, honey,” she said. “How did you sleep?”
“Fine,” he lied.
“Come sit down, please.”
“Mom…”
“The boy hasn’t had anything to eat since the hospital, Inko,” All Might whispered, barely audible. He had his eyes and forehead in his hand. “Give him some cereal or something, before.”
And then there was this agonizing, skin-prickling second of silence from Inko, one that Izuku had never felt before from his soft, tender-hearted mother, before she slowly got up.
“Get out.”
Izuku blinked, and looked behind him. When he saw no one, dread settled in him as he thought his mother meant him, but then she said it again, the temperature in that summer morning room dropping to freezing.
“Get out of my house, Yagi.”
“Mom!” Izuku gasped.
All Might flinched and sat straight up like he’d been struck by lightning, and he removed his hand from his eyes. The skin around his eyes was deathly black. “Inko—” he started.
Inko took three steps across the chasm and grabbed All Might’s arm, yanking up, up, sideways, until the force of it lost its direction and only had pure, unadulterated anger. All Might followed — had no choice but to, unless he wanted to lose an arm along with the rest of him. “I can't bear you anymore, Yagi!" She was yelling, but her voice was scratched raw, barely making past a sob. "Always letting my Izuku do as he pleases, on and on and on about hero work and never about him being a reckless teenager , my boy , he is my boy, Yagi, my boy , and I won't let you let him die !"
"Mom, stop, please !" Izuku begged, holding on to her arm as she violently clutched his father's arm with her other claw, tearing fabric, tearing skin. "Mom!"
"I love him, Inko, you know that!" All Might was yelling, desperate, confused, heartbroken, indignant. "I love him more than anything in this world, Inko, how could you say such things!"
"You love him enough to let him destroy himself, Yagi," Inko cried. "And I can't have that much love for him, not in this life. I love him just enough to want him alive!"
"Mom…" Izuku whispered.
"I will sooner rip this Earth in two before I let my son dive head first into death. Do you hear me, Izuku?" She turned to him, face wet and glaring. "It is done , you are done killing yourself, or so help me kill me if you're so adamant in going out there again, because I can't set foot in that hospital again! I can't see you in that bed anymore, Izuku, why can't you have some mercy for your fucking mother , Izuku, why, why, why, why !"
Inko broke off in a high-pitched, heart wrenching wail, and she fell to the floor with her head in her hands. She cried louder than Izuku had ever heard her, and he was frozen useless in shock, feet planted to the ground, heart somewhere under it. All Might kneeled next to his love, embracing her to him and letting her cry, ignoring the red marks on his arm and in his eyes. He loved her so much, Izuku realized, and his mother loved him — loved Izuku.
And Izuku, who had known that unshakable fact since he was born, was left dumbfounded.
"I'm…" Izuku said, or thought he said. His voice was too small, even to him. "I'm going back to my room."
He stumbled backwards and hit a shelf, rattling the contents inside it, but the clicks and clings of porcelain in his ears couldn't begin to rival his mother's cries. He walked backwards again, but his strength left him when he got to the staircase, so he merely stumbled and sat on the lowest step, drained.
He could hear All Might speaking. And then, his mom. He couldn't make out what they were saying — which was good. It meant they weren't screaming in each other's faces. But, then his mother sobbed again, and Izuku wished he had never woken up.
Why can't you have some mercy for your fucking mother, Izuku.
Izuku was so out of it that the first thing that came to his mind was, "Mom swore."
Swore.
Kacchan.
Izuku craned his neck, eyes locking with the front door.
Kacchan didn't want to see him.
Why not?
Izuku wanted to kiss him so bad. Wanted to hold him. Ask him if they could still have another date before his summer classes.
Despite the heavy haze hanging over his eyes, Izuku still remembered their date in high definition. The morning of it, the bathroom, the ramen shop, the convenience store. The villain. The blood on Kacchan's clothes and Izuku's hands. The glass.
Izuku blinked, like the cinema had halted the movie halfway and left the audience — Izuku, in just one chair looking dead ahead — alone in the dark.
Izuku slumped sideways, leaning on the banister. He glanced at the door again, Kacchan's house on his mind, on the street, just steps away, but thought better of it when he heard his parents shuffling in the living room.
Inko and All Might were at the doorway, looking at him, strange, strained half-smiles on their faces that Izuku faintly remembered as something his mom and biological father had done after signing their divorce papers. All Might had an arm loosely curled around Inko's shoulders.
Inko was the first to break the silence. "Do you want some cereal, sweetie?"
Izuku blinked, and said in a flat voice, "Yeah, sure."
"Mm. Yagi?"
"Sounds wonderful. I'll make the coffee."
"Okay." Inko smiled at him, nowhere near reaching her eyes, but was a start, as he went. Then, she met her son's eyes, and something inside her seemed to pop and deflate, like a balloon half-filled with air. Her smile dropped slowly, but then she breathed in and looked at him again. "Get the milk from the fridge, will you, Izuku?"
"Mom."
"Get the milk first," she said sternly. "Please."
Izuku paused. "Okay." He looked at the door again. "Is Kacchan going to be here later?"
No response. When he turned back, his mom wasn't there anymore.