Chapter Text
MONTY
In retrospect, I probably shouldn’t have shagged my roommate. It wasn’t the stupidest thing I did that night, but it’s definitely been the most annoying to deal with. Begging Dante to let me keep my job? A challenge. Broken rib from being hit by a car? Bothersome. Having to live with someone I seduced and then rejected the morning after? Unacceptable.
Eventually, though, things worked themselves out. As things usually tend to do. And by that I mean… Sinjon found the situation so incredibly uncomfortable that he decided to move out.
In a stroke of luck that almost, almost , makes me believe in a higher power— Percy was able to swap rooms with him. Percy. In my room. Every night.
I mean… that was probably going to happen anyway, but Percy living with me? I feel like a pig in shit.
I don’t intend to arrive when Sinjon is finishing packing up his stuff, but I do, and so I help as much as I can. We don’t really speak, aside from the occasional instruction, and it’s fairly excruciating— but fuck it. It’s for a good cause.
I finish taping up a box, quite impressed with my vaguely masculine handiwork, then I step back, looking over at him. God, he really is lovely. Handsome and sweet and shy. Perhaps if he’d been single from the start, and actually slept here this entire time, we could have been a thing.
But who am I kidding? I wasn’t looking for “a thing”. I’d have slept with him, of course, but it would have been just as reckless. And we’d have been this bloody awkward around each other for even longer.
I clear my throat. “Listen. Sinjon. I’m sorry about…” I vaguely wave with my hand, then frown as I notice I’ve motioned at his bed. “Uh. Yeah. That.”
He looks at the bed, then back at me. He turns a little pink. “Oh. Yes. That’s… fine. Honestly.”
“It’s not fine. Really, it’s not. You were upset, and I was being an idiot. I took advantage and I really am sorry.”
He winces slightly. “You didn’t… take advantage . In fact… my memory of it is a little bit cloudy, but I’m pretty certain it was my idea.”
I take a breath. It’s probably not helpful to point out that it’s a sign of successful flirting— making the other person think it was their idea the entire time.
“Still. I think we can both agree it was… a mistake. Right?”
He gives me a sad smile. “Yes. We can agree.” Then he pauses. “It was fun, though.”
“Well, that goes without saying.” Then I grimace. “Don’t tell my boyfriend I said that.”
He laughs, and starts stripping the sheets on his bed. “He’s adorable. You’re very lucky.”
“I know.” I smile to myself, not even trying to look modest. “He’s perfect. And neither of us have plans for Christmas, so we’re just going to hang out here. Just the two of us.”
“Sounds lovely. I’m so pleased for you.”
He doesn’t sound like he means it.
“Do you… have any nice Christmas plans?”
He laughs, giving me a look. “Oh, just the usual. Going home and listening to my homophobic parents bicker. Perhaps sneak away to my room and watch Muppets Christmas Carol.”
“Right.”
I watch him as he packs his sheets away, and he looks around to see if there’s anything he’s missed. I could invite him. Would it be weird? It would definitely be at least a little weird to have him there, when we had sex the night before Percy and I made it official. But Percy knows. He knows it meant nothing. And he won’t be the only ex-hookup— Jeanne will be there too! (… Shit, I’ve done at least mouth stuff with half of the party. What’s wrong with me?) Plus Sinjon just looks so… sad.
Fuck it.
“You know, my friends are having a little Christmas Eve get together before they go back to their families. You’re very welcome to join us.”
He turns to me, frowning. “Oh. Really?”
“Really! They’re a lovely bunch. Well. Apart from Sim. She’s a monster. But she grows on you.”
“Sounds… appealing.”
“Honestly, please come. It’ll be a nice send-off. And I’ll feel… 4% less guilty about this whole thing if you come.”
“I told you, there’s nothing to feel guilty about!”
I bat my eyelashes at him anyway. “There will be gin… and I’m not having any of it. So plenty to go around.” I gasp, suddenly remembering something. “Oh! And! The extremely handsome, rather lovely boy whose heart Percy stomped on will be there….”
That gets his attention. He raises his eyebrows. “Oh? That’s… I do like gin. Sounds nice. Yes. I’ll come. Thank you.”
I clap my hands and grin. “Excellent! Now let’s get you out of here so I can have Percy on tap 24/7.”
PERCY
The plans for tonight had started out as ‘Monty and I spending some quiet time together’ yet, somehow, evolved into ‘invite all our friends over to have a takeaway, crammed in the kitchen of the biggest dorm we have available’. Though admittedly, while Monty started it, I'm just as much to blame. First, he took pity on his sister and invited her over; then I asked Sim to come to even things out; then his friend Jeanne invited herself; then I ran into August on my way back from the store and as he helped me carry some groceries, he told me his friends who were planning on catching a movie with him canceled last minute, so I awkwardly told him he could hang out with us; then, this morning, Sim stated she wasn't going anywhere without Johanna; and eventually, Monty invited his roommate, somewhat out of guilt. All of this leading to eight twenty-somethings squeezing into the kitchen of Johanna’s somehow considerably bigger, more decent-looking and roommate-less dorm.
It’s extremely lively, though, and I find myself grinning from ear to ear.
Jeanne is sitting on the counter and gesturing animatedly as she and Sinjon share stories about their hook-ups with Monty, which somehow mortifies me more than it mortifies the man in question. Felicity remained extremely awkward at first—she even brought a book—but by now she, Sim and Johanna seem to be hitting it off. Due to a lacking number of chairs, Monty has sprawled himself over my lap, much to the disgust of our guests, though I only half-heartedly pretended to be annoyed, and now he’s tossing the occasional offhand comment into Felicity’s conversation while August and I discuss our favorite film soundtracks.
When I invited him over, I’d been pretty worried things would be seriously awkward between us, but the opposite proved to be true—even with our crushes out of the way, August and I get along very well. Now that I can talk to him without starting on panic-fueled anecdotes about crabs, I find that we share even more interests than I originally thought, and he’s pretty funny, too. So I suppose in the end everything turned out the way it should have been between us.
Altogether, I can’t remember the last time I’ve felt this sincerely content, with tin-foil and half-empty food containers scattered across the tiny kitchen, surrounded by our friends, with the love of my life pressed against my chest, watching his cheeky grin as he delivers some witty quip.
This is all mine. At least for tonight, no one is going to take this away from me.
“Laugh all you want,” Felicity says, lifting her chin. “But next week, I’ll be visiting universities.”
“Yearning, are you, Fel?”
“ Planning .” She smiles smugly. “Our parents have reluctantly agreed to let me study medicine.”
“Wait, shit, really?”
Felicity crosses her arms. “I may or may not have suggested that if they do not, I’m taking your example and getting out the minute I turn eighteen.”
Sim nods approvingly. “Emotional blackmail. I like it.”
“Good for you.” Johanna leans over to pat Felicity on the shoulder. “I used to plan to get a degree in biology, a few years back. It’s pretty much my back-up option now if acting doesn’t work out.”
“Job scarcity? In this entertainment industry?” Monty scoffs humorously. “Don’t be ridiculous, darling. We’re all going to be stars.”
“You’re one to talk,” Jeanne cuts in. “Not all of us just get roles thrown at us.”
Monty grins sheepishly.
After missing out the show that was essentially most of his grade due to being in the hospital, long negotiations followed, and eventually, Monty was given a minor role in an actual local production. He hasn’t shut up about it since he got it, and I’m happy watching him be so excited.
The fact that Helena begrudgingly let slip they wouldn’t have arranged it if he didn’t have the talent for it, didn’t help either.
“How was the play, anyway?” he asks, and Jeanne groans before he’s even finished his sentence.
“ Horrible . Richard messed up half his lines. I lost years of my life trying to keep that play together.”
“You did so really well, though,” August remarks. “I could hardly tell.”
Jeanne huffs, but she’s clearly flattered. She tosses her long blond hair over her shoulder. “Anyway. I gave him a piece of my mind after the show. About the lines and his breath. And him trying to use tongue in a goddamn stage kiss .”
The room gags in unison.
“Sorry you had to miss my expert skills,” Monty says.
Jeanne raises an eyebrow. “Acting or kissing?”
“Yes.”
A few people scoff. Jeanne places a wistful hand against her chest. “Full disclosure, I do miss your mouth sometimes, Mont.”
Sim frowns. “Oh, come on. He can’t be that good.”
Jeanne, Sinjon and I make disagreeing sounds in unison. Monty grins triumphantly. I go red.
“The feeling is requited though, my darling,” he tells Jeanne. When he catches my reproachful stare, he quickly adds, “But of course I am legally obliged to say that my beloved here is superior in every way.” He drapes his arms around my neck. I still don’t look convinced, so he says, “It’s the truth, darling. You know it is.” He presses a kiss to my lips, and everyone makes exaggerated noises of disgust.
“Hmmm.”
“Baby! I ran under a car for you!”
“ Please don’t put it like that ever again .”
Monty smiles contritely. He sits up again, arms still around me, and loudly proclaims, “This is my official announcement! I’m terribly sorry to all the hearts I’ve broken, but impossibly perfect Percy Newton is my one and only. Don’t worry, in just a few weeks, you’ll start to get over it.”
I catch a few eyerolls, and Jeanne scoffs. “Please. I got over you in days .”
Monty frowns as he takes that in, then whips around. “Uh. What?”
She suddenly looks a little shy, holding her glass at shoulder height. “Well. I did fancy you for quite a few months, you know.”
It goes quiet.
“You…” Monty blinks. “But… we were sleeping together.” (Felicity says, “Oh, God.”) “Friends with benefits! And you… had feelings for me?”
“ That’s familiar,” I mutter.
“You really didn’t know?” Jeanne asks.
“Looks like I’m not the only oblivious one in this relationship,” I say with a smile, then press a kiss to Monty’s cheek.
He still looks thrown off. “Shit, Jeanne. I’m so sorry. I didn’t…”
“It’s fine!” She waves his apology away. “I’ve already got someone new, anyway.”
“A new… bed partner to crush on?”
“A new actual partner.” She sips from her drink, feigning indifference. “Their name is Theo, and we’ve been together for three weeks now.”
The room erupts in cheerful congratulations. Monty sends a spitfire of questions her way, that she responds to with played annoyance. August is about to stand up to fetch a drink for himself, but Sinjon, currently without anything in his hands, beats him to it. He hands August the new bottle and gets a grateful smile in return.
“August, right?” Sinjon prompts. “I hear you’re these two’s other most recent victim.”
“I resent that,” I say, but Monty only laughs.
“Other?” August asks, looking between us.
Sinjon looks over to Monty, but the latter just shrugs. Sinjon extends his hand. “Sinjon, Monty’s most recent hook-up. Before he got a boyfriend.”
August shakes it, not-so-subtly checking him out. “Nice to meet you. How did that go?”
“I don’t think his heart was really in it,” Sinjon replies with a smirk. “I put in all my best moves for nothing…”
August’s eyebrows shoot up. “Oh?”
Sinjon grins and August takes a breath, finally letting go of his hand. I elbow Monty, a silent ‘ are you seeing what I’m seeing?’ He elbows me back in response.
“Well,” August continues, slightly flustered. “At least you actually got to the hooking up part with Monty…”
“I hate to rub salt in the wound, too,” Monty cuts in, “but you really have no idea what you’re missing.”
“Monty,” I scold him gently.
“What? Can’t I brag about my boyfriend’s talents to our friends?”
“Perhaps not about those talents if we want to keep our friends. Or if you want to keep your boyfriend.” I press a kiss behind his ear.
Monty huffs. “Can’t even boast without risking my relationship. Some boyfriend you are.”
“We really don’t need to know just how much you’ve been at it since you got together,” Jeanne cuts in, amused.
Monty and I go quiet.
“Uh,” I say.
“Oh, come on,” Jeanne says. “Don’t blame us for making fun of your horniness. Or has it genuinely been that much?”
I do feel like I need to defend us here somehow. “Emphatically not.”
“ Please .”
“We’re all friends here,” Sinjon adds with a crooked smirk.
Monty and I exchange an uncomfortable glance. “We haven’t,” he then says.
All conversation dies away.
“Haven’t… what?” August asks.
I sigh deeply. “Haven’t anything. Slept together. At all.”
We find the six other people present incredulously staring at us.
“Right,” Felicity cuts the silence. “As if.”
“We haven’t ,” Monty stresses.
“You two are in a proper relationship and have been for four weeks, have had plenty of occasion, and now you’ve even moved in together. As if you haven’t done anything.”
We don’t respond.
“Wait, are you serious?” Jeanne gasps.
“Monty only just got out of the hospital when we got back together,” I defend.
“And we were busy ,” Monty adds on. “With the play, and… I don’t know, assignments.”
Everyone’s looking at us like we’re mad. I feel my face heating up. “ Fine . We’re waiting for the right moment.”
Monty buries his face in my neck. “Please, darling, that makes me sound like a sap.”
“You are a sap,” I say gently, putting a hand in his hair. “When it comes down to it.”
“Lies and slander,” he mutters.
“That’s…” Sinjon says, “... actually kind of sweet.”
Monty makes a noise in protest. He sits up, looking flustered. “Shut up. It’s just that Percy is really important to me and I don’t want it to be… I hope I haven’t…” He defensively points at the others. “Not that it’s any of your business, but we just want to do it right.”
We’re answered with some endeared gasps that may or may not be sarcastic.
“Oh, that’s so cute!” Johanna cooes. “You’ve still got your first time up ahead!”
“Uh,” I say.
Monty glances at me. “I mean... technically?”
“What do you mean, technically?” August asks, and Sim buries her face in her hand.
We exchange some looks. Then Monty carefully says, “ Technically we still haven’t gotten to our proper first time. But technically , before we got together, there was also, the… ah.” He makes a whimsical gesture. “The sex course.”
“The what— ”
MONTY
After dinner, we head back to my room— our room, much to the sustained amusement of our friends. But where did they expect Percy to sleep? He’s my roommate now. My gorgeous, sexy, wonderful roommate that I am absolutely going out of my head wanting to fu—
“It’s so quiet,” he says, blessedly interrupting my thoughts.
I look around. We’re walking across campus, hand in hand, wrapped up in our coats and scarves, and it really is peaceful. It seems our little group were some of the last remaining students hanging around before heading home to see their families. I rub his knuckle with my thumb and hum slightly.
“Do you like it?”
“I do. Although if I were that fond of peace and quiet, I probably wouldn’t have fallen for you .”
I gasp. “How dare you. I am terribly quiet and unassuming.”
“You’re the most assuming person I’ve ever known.”
I swing round in front of him, letting go of his hand and placing my gloved hands on his hips instead. He grins, resting his arms on my shoulders. I look up at him.
“Did you find me annoying when we first met?”
His brow furrows. “No. Should I have?”
“Feli thinks I make a bad first impression.”
“Well.” He leans down, and I go on my tip toes to meet his kiss. “She’s wrong. I thought you were fascinating.”
“ ‘Fascinating’ is not necessarily a positive thing.”
“Stop it,” he orders, quite sternly. “I mean it. I may not have loved you from the moment I saw you, not consciously at least… but I couldn’t wait to be around you again as soon as you walked away.”
I smirk. “That’s just because I offered to teach you about blowjobs.”
He rolls his eyes, stepping away from me. “I give up. I’m not going to shove my compliments down your throat.”
I jog after him. “Speaking of—”
“ No . Stop talking immediately.”
I laugh, catching up with him and latching onto his hand again. “You know, it’s terrible the way you speak to me.”
“I’m a terrible boyfriend. Whyever do you put up with me?”
Boyfriend. I never tire of hearing that. Boyfriend, boyfriend, Percy is my boyfriend. It seems wrong in a way— aren’t people meant to go through several dreadful partners before they find one this perfect? I’ve skipped ahead.
“I’m with you purely for your looks.”
“I suspected as much.” I look up at him. “So… August and Sinjon …”
He laughs. “If you’re about to ask me if I’m jealous…”
“I’m not! I just want your… thoughts.”
“If anything, I should be asking you. You’re the one that actually fu—“
“Once! I barely know him!” I pause. “That doesn’t sound good, does it?”
“Nope.”
“Well, I think they’d be adorable together. What a wonderful, unexpected Christmas gift.”
Percy squeezes my hand. “You’re a very strange person, Monty.”
“I just want everyone to be happy , Perce.”
“Well… you’ve not done a terrible job of that.” He leans over and kisses the top of my head. I lean into it, closing my eyes. “You’ve made me very happy indeed.”
I swallow, then force out a small casual laugh. “You soft twat.”
PERCY
We get back to the room, and Monty unceremoniously dumps his coat and scarf on the floor as soon as the door closes. I look down at the mess on the floor, then look back at him.
“You’re a horrible roommate, aren’t you?”
He frowns. “I’m not actually sure. Never really got the opportunity to find out.”
I nod. “The first time you properly met your roommate, you shagged him.”
“Is that not what… good roommates do?”
I narrow my eyes. “You’re a demon.”
He steps up to me, pulling off my scarf and sliding my coat down my arms. He dumps those on the floor, too.
“And you love me.”
“God help me, I do.”
He grins at me, then steps away again, taking his phone from his pocket and starting to look for something. He puts it down on the desk as a song starts to play.
‘Guess I never had a love like this / Hit me harder than I ever expected.’
I recognise it instantly. The song he played in the empty theatre when he tried to teach me to dance. I listened to it every day after that— oblivious as to why I was so enamoured with it. God, I really was a fucking idiot.
He walks back over to me, slinging his arms around my neck. “Remember this?”
I smile. “I dipped you. And kissed you.”
“Yep!”
“I really did torture you, didn’t I?”
“Yep!”
I smile apologetically, resting my hands on his hips, watching as he starts to move them in time to the music. He’s hypnotic, he really is. I could watch him forever.
“You have to move too, you know. Otherwise it's less… us dancing. And more me giving you a show.”
“I’m absolutely fine with that.”
He laughs, pulling me closer and we start to move together. It should feel awkward— two grown men slow-dancing like they’re at a school prom. But it doesn’t. Monty close to me like this, no one else around— it feels perfect.
We stay that way for a while. Swaying. Holding each other. The song ends, and we continue moving, until eventually Monty looks up at me.
My breath catches when I see the look in his eyes, the one he saves just for me: open, trusting, serious.
“Hello,” he says quietly.
“Hi.”
And then he cups my face with his hands, pulling me down into a kiss.
We’ve kissed since we got together. Plenty, in fact. But per our agreement to start afresh, like the course never happened, it’s never gone much further than a gentle smooch. This… is not a gentle smooch.
It deepens almost immediately, and I slide my hands around his waist, pulling him as close as I physically can. He hums against my mouth, his hands moving from my face to my hair, and god— I want him. So badly. I’m not sure this arrangement is going to last much longer. Not when I can’t shake the memories of how he feels, how he tastes, the way he gasps when I nip at his neck. It’s taking every piece of control I have not to rip his clothes off every time we’re alone.
When we finally break apart, we’re both breathless. Monty doesn’t move far, his lips are still brushing against mine and he lets go something that’s a mix of a laugh and a breathy sigh.
“ Fuck .”
“Yeah,” I agree, feeling dizzy.
“Perce… I uhm…” he trails off, his fingernails gently scratching against my scalp. “You know this whole… taking it slow… thing?”
I nod, trying to look casual. “Yeah?”
“Can we just…” He takes a long, deep breath. “Can we just not do that anymore?”
My shoulders drop in relief. “Oh, thank god.”
I kiss him again, even more intensely, gripping him around the waist so tightly that he lifts a couple of inches off of the ground. He squeaks, then laughs and pulls back.
“Steady on, darling.”
I huff petulantly. “Don’t want to. Done steadying on. I’ve had enough steadying on for a lifetime.”
He laughs again. “God. I’ve been going mad.”
“Me too. Why do you have to be so bloody…” I back him towards my bed until the back of his calves hit the mattress with a gentle thunk. “… gorgeous? You’re impossible.”
I lean down and start to kiss his neck, to cement my point. He moans quietly, tilting his head up to give me better access.
“I’m sorry—” he chokes out, trying to sound mischievous, but it comes out wobbly. “I should have— mmm— tried to be uglier. But gorgeous is all I know.”
“It must be such a burden.”
“It’s the cross I must bear.” He tugs at my hair until I’m looking at him again. “Anyway. You can talk.”
I scoff. “I hardly compare.”
He frowns at me, looking genuinely affronted. “You don’t honestly believe that, do you?”
“I don’t know….” I shrug, suddenly feeling self conscious. “It’s not like I’ve ever had people throwing themselves at me like always you seem to.”
“You were probably too dense to notice! It’s somewhat of a pattern!”
I mustn’t look convinced, so he rolls his eyes, cupping my face again and leaning in to gently kiss my forehead.
“ You… are the most beautiful man on earth.” He moves to kiss my nose. “I am lucky to even get to look at you.” He ghosts a kiss across my cheekbone. “Let alone kiss you.”
I can feel how red I must look. I’m practically burning.
He kisses me in a couple more places— my brow bone, my chin— before finally landing on my lips again. I sigh into it, then finally push him backwards until we both land on the bed with a clumsy thud. We’re a messy pile of limbs and laughter, but eventually manage to detangle ourselves enough so that I’m pinning his hands to the mattress, kissing his neck again.
I nip at his pulse point, he gasps, and I store this new memory with the old ones. The “fake” ones. That always seemed so very, very real.
“Mmm… Perce. What do you…”
I keep mouthing at his neck and he shifts underneath me.
“What are we…” he continues. “Is this…?”
I look up at him, raising an eyebrow.
“Is this…?”
“Do you want to, you know…” He’s blushing . “Lesson Seven?”
I stare at him for a couple of seconds. “Lesson Seven.”
“Yes…?”
I blink, amused. “What happened to pretending the course never happened?”
He smirks. “Impossible.”
“This isn’t ‘ Lesson Seven’ , Monts.”
He looks disappointed. “Oh. That’s…”
“No! I mean. It is. It’s just— I mean it’s—” I groan, burying my face in his neck again and speaking against his skin, muffled. “Can we just have sex please?”
He starts giggling. “Say that again.”
I look up at him, narrowing my eyes. “Please?”
“No! The whole thing.”
“You’re a menace.”
“ Peeeerrceee.”
I take a deep breath, then sigh “Sex. You. Me. Now.”
He grins. “If you insist .”
And then he pulls his hands free from mine, reaching down to pull off his shirt.
MONTY
I want him on top of me forever. Is there a way I can just have him on top of me forever?
He’s exploring me with his mouth, like it’s the last time he’ll ever get the opportunity (it most certainly isn’t). My neck, my chest, my stomach. When he reaches my ribs, brushing his lips over the bruising that has still yet to fully fade, I feel myself practically melt into the mattress.
He kisses back up over my chest, until he’s dragging his lips over my jaw, back towards my lips. I sigh into his mouth, burying my hands in his hair.
I wrap my legs around his waist, pulling him closer to me so that our bodies are flush and I can feel that he’s as ready for this as I am. A quiet groan slips out of his mouth as I buck my hips up into him.
“How do you…?” he chokes out.
“This. Like this.”
“Yes?”
I huff out a laugh. “ Yes ! Just… kiss me. Don’t stop kissing me.”
PERCY
I don’t stop kissing him. I kiss him as trousers and underwear get discarded, then through a toe-curling reciprocal revisiting of Lesson Four. I kiss slowly at his neck as a bottle is procured from Monty’s bedside table and Lesson Six gets underway,
Monty has one leg wrapped around me now, and his head is tilted back onto the pillows. His breathing is getting more weighted and his fingers are massaging at my neck.
“That’s good,” he mumbles. “Like that.”
I keep going. I feel slightly clumsy. And out of my depth. But then I do something that makes him cry out, and his thighs shake… and perhaps I’m not so useless after all.
“ Fuck . Darling…”
I kiss back up to his mouth, speaking against his lips. “Good?”
“Good. Very good. God . You’re unbelievable. Do you know that?”
“I had a good teacher…”
He groans, then pulls me down into another deep, desperate kiss. I could happily do this forever. Make him gasp and shake— watch his face as he comes apart. I’m barely even thinking about my own pleasure until he says, words punching their way through a gasp; “Now. I’m ready now.”
I barely have time to respond before a condom is unceremoniously tossed at me from somewhere. I pull back, then pick it up, raising an eyebrow at him.
“Keen, Monts?”
He looks up at me, wide-eyed. “Are you not ?”
I grin at him, leaning in to give him a quick kiss before sitting back on my heels, opening the wrapper and trying to remember the flimsy sex education I had at school. It takes some fumbling (Monty watching me with his eyes half-closed, chewing on his lip, doesn’t help matters), but eventually it’s on. And then…
Well…
I must hesitate for slightly too long, as Monty leans up, grabbing me by the back of my neck and pulling me back down, wrapping both of his legs around my hips this time and arching up into me.
“Are you ready, darling?”
I swallow, then nod. “You?”
“More ready than I’ve ever been in my entire life.”
I look at him, taking him in. His hair, messy and spread over the pillow. His eyes, blown out and almond-shaped and beautiful. The flush on his neck, the way his chest is rising and falling rapidly. Then he grins, wiggling his eyebrows, and all my nerves seem to melt away.
I lean down and kiss him, then he reaches his hand between us, guiding me, and then— I sigh into his mouth. And he whispers a gentle “ Perce…” in response.
This is it. We’re here. Through all the bullshit, we made it here.
“You can move,” he says, his fingers playing with the curls at the back of my neck. “I’m good.”
And so I do. Slowly, watching his face. It feels even more incredible than I thought it would. The heat and closeness of it is making my brain short circuit.
He looks at me, resting a hand on my hip. I pause.
“How does it feel?”
My brow furrows. “Have you never…?”
“Not that.” He curls his toes against my calves, rubbing them up and down until I shiver. “I mean how does it feel… no longer being a virgin?”
I roll my eyes slightly. “Really?”
“Has your world changed? Have I turned it upside down? Have I—”
I shut him up with a kiss, and then I start to move against him again, faster— I pin one of his hands to the pillow, threading his fingers through my own. He whines slightly, sounding somewhat pained, and I pause, which makes him give a frustrated huff.
“Are you…” I’m getting breathless now. Words are a struggle. “Are you okay?”
“Yes! I’m just…slightly...” He sighs, grimacing, like he’s struggling to find the words. “This is… kind of a first for me, too.”
“Oh.” I frown, my fingers gently trailing up his arm. “This… position?”
He gives me a look. “Oh yes, Perce. This very rare and unusual position. Missionary.”
I laugh, and it comes out shaky. “Well, I don’t know! You’re the expert here…”
He pinches my arm. “I mean … because I’ve never done it with anyone I actually— anyone I cared about.”
I pause, using my free hand to push some stray hair out of his face.
“Is it… better?”
He laughs. “Are you really asking me that?”
I smirk. “Some reassurance is always welcome…”
“Yes, darling. It’s better. It’s wonderful. Just…”
He nips at my cheek, then rolls his hips, making me gasp.
“Keep going.”
MONTY
I’ve pictured this a lot. Wondered how it would feel to have Percy inside of me. How good we’d feel together. And I was right— it’s bloody incredible. He’s tender, but intent. He’s watching my every reaction, learning as he goes (he’s always been good at that) and steadily taking me apart.
It’s so… different. The mechanics of it are familiar, of course. But… everything else is so different . It’s him . I’m with Percy. He’s with me. I’m… overwhelmed— in the best possible way.
I reach down to touch myself, intending to make things a little easier for him, but he huffs and shakes his head. He gently bats my hand away, replacing it with his and— fuck .
I close my eyes, savouring every moment, every sensation. I’m getting close, but I don’t want this to end. It’s a stupid thought. So stupid. This will happen again (extremely regularly if I have any say in it), but this . This first time... I want it to last forever.
“Monty… look at me…” he says quietly, soothingly. Hesitantly, I open my eyes, knowing what I see is probably going to tip me over. It’s definitely a near thing— his eyes are blown, his face slack with pleasure, his lips red and swollen from kissing. He keeps rocking into me. Stroking me. Slowly, deliberately. He watches me, and then he bites his lip, before saying—
“Come for me, darling.”
Bastard . Before I can even be annoyed at him using my own dirty tricks against me, I go over the edge. My back arching, my fingers gripping his harder, a loud moan leaving my lips as the pleasure sings through me.
He’s not far behind, pressing his mouth against my neck with a gasp, then a little laugh (how I love that little laugh), as he rocks into me more deeply.
I gasp, letting go of his hand to clutch at his shoulders, wanting him closer. Even though I know it’s not possible to be any closer than we are now.
“Percy,” I somehow manage to speak. Because I need to say it; “ Percy . I love you. I love— ah . I love you so fucking much.“
He moves to lean his head against mine, breathless, panting— “I love you— too. Love you, too. Jesus , Monty…”
PERCY
We move together— rocking, grasping at any skin we can reach, kissing messily— until we’re both finished… and then for a while longer. Slowly. Drowsily. Monty’s hands slowly stroking my back as we both come down from the impossible high.
And then it’s over.
I collapse against him, burying my head in his neck and sighing. “Wow…”
I feel him shake slightly as he laughs. “Yep.”
“That was… wow.”
“Indeed.”
“Is it always that…?” I trail off, not knowing what to say.
“Is it always that wow?”
I nod, still unable to find the energy to lift my head. He laughs again.
“No. Definitely not.”
“Right. Okay.”
It takes all of my strength, but I look back up at him. He’s looking at me. So… fondly. So in awe. It makes my breath catch.
“Hello,” I manage to say.
“Hi.”
I put my hands on his hips, gently moving us apart, then reaching down and dealing with the condom. He sighs when I’m finished, wrapping his arms around my neck.
“Thank you.”
“Why are you thanking me?”
“I don’t know, just… thank you.”
I smile, feeling lightheaded. “I’ve been thinking about that for a long time. Probably since you put it on that stupid laptop screen in Comic bloody Sans… maybe even before then.”
“Did it meet your expectations, sweetheart?”
“Absolutely.” I lean in, gently brushing my lips against his. “Merry Christmas, Monty.”
He laughs. “Is it Christmas? I’d forgotten.”
I grin. “I love you. So much.”
“I love you, too.”
We kiss for a while. Softly. Sweetly. And I feel like I may burst with how much I love him. Like it’s throbbing in my veins. I take a long, deep breath. I don’t think I’m done with him yet.
“You know… with our usual lessons…”
He looks amused. “I thought this wasn’t a lesson?”
I ignore him. “With our usual lessons…. we have somewhat of a routine.”
He looks confused. “Oh?”
I nod, smirking. “You first. Then I try.”
He pauses, then laughs. “I dreamt you, didn’t I? This is all just a desperately horny, wonderful dream.”
I grin. “Perhaps.”
MONTY
After, we’re lying side by side, catching our breaths, our hands linked between us. I’m very much beyond the capability to articulate any coherent thoughts, in the most delightful way. Percy seems to be too, because he just squeezes my hand, and I appreciatively squeeze back.
Probably about ten minutes pass, where we quietly relish in each other’s presence, before I manage to roll onto my side, resting my chin on his shoulder. “So,” I say, still more breath than sound, “how was that?”
Percy turns his head to the side, his nose brushing mine as he does. “It was… That was… certainly something.”
I smirk. “Lesson rating?”
He groans. “Really?”
“Really.”
A mischievous light shines in his eyes. “Well, I don’t know…”
“You bastard.”
“Aren’t you open to constructive criticism?”
With great effort, I roll on top of him, hovering my face inches above his. “Emphatically not.”
“Well, you’re getting it anyway. We have waited way too long to do this. It is somewhat of a crime we haven’t been doing this every single night since we got together. I’m deducting major points for that.”
I laugh, resting my forehead in the crook of his neck. “I’m terribly sorry to disappoint. I’m afraid I offer no refunds, though.”
“You’ll just have to make it up to me in other ways, then.” I hum, and his hand tangles in my hair. “Why did we decide to wait again?”
“Because…” I falter. I shift slightly as I search for the right words. Percy keeps raking his fingers through my hair, quiet reassurance. “Because it wasn’t supposed to be… a lesson. I didn’t want it to feel like a lesson.”
Percy tilts his head to look at me. “Is that the reason?”
“It is. For me. I didn’t…” I swallow. “I didn’t want you to think we’d just… skip to the end. By default. All of that other stuff wasn’t…”
“Real?”
“Oh. I don’t know. It was certainly real.”
Percy’s hand briefly stills, then he tugs at one of my locks. “It was real. And… significant. But I know what you mean.”
“Mmm.” I settle back down. “Also, I did somewhat set you up with impossibly high expectations as to my sexual abilities, and perhaps I wasn’t quite ready to face the inevitable let-down.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. You’re fantastic and you know it.” I give him a cheeky grin and he huffs. Then he turns serious again. “And I know… I know it always would have been good, but I’m glad we saved it up. Glad we waited until now. Because now it was…”
“Perfect?”
“Well. Maybe until you asked for a lesson rating…”
A laugh trips out of me, loud and unabashed. “I love you. You absolute menace.”
“Hmm.” He tips my chin up, and presses a sweet kiss to my lips. “I love you too. But we’re not quite done yet.”
I frown.
“This evening needs one more thing.”
“I never thought I’d say this, Perce, but I’m pretty much shagged out for today. Maybe even for tomorrow.”
“ Not something sex related. Good Lord, Monty.” I grin and he fakes exasperation, then nudges me. “Go fetch my laptop for me.”
“Ugh.” I reluctantly pull myself up until I’m sitting. “Why me?”
“I’m not entirely sure I can walk at the moment.”
I must be smirking a bit too smugly, because he nudges me again to get me to hurry up. I peel myself off of him and stand up to grab the requested item. He sits up against the headboard and I let myself flop down next to him, pulling up the blankets.
I nuzzle into his shoulder as he clicks through some things. A familiar theme starts playing, and I blink my eyes open. The screen displays the opening to a Star Wars movie.
“What’s this?”
He proudly smiles at me. “ Return of the Jedi .”
I gape at him in disbelief for a second, corners of my mouth tugging up. He looks very pleased with himself. “I can’t believe you,” I say.
“Don’t you like it?”
“I love it, you idiot.” I kiss him. “It really is perfect. Thank you.”
He kisses me back. “You’re more than welcome.”
We settle down together to watch the movie. Through the window, I see the first frail snowflakes start to fall, crystalizing the lights outside, yet here, I feel hopelessly warm, and comfortable, and at peace. I can’t remember the last time I felt this happy. And I know I won’t be able to cling onto this moment forever, and that, inevitably, life will go on. I don’t know what the future has in store for me, but I’m ready to face anything, knowing Percy will be by my side.
“So which one of us is Han and which one is Leia?” I ask after a while.
“I’m not sure.”
“I don’t think I’m Leia, though.”
Percy gives me a sideways grin. “You’re short enough for it.”
I nudge him with my elbow.
“Besides,” Percy says, “didn’t we establish that I’m the Luke to your Han?”
“So we did!” I turn back to the screen. “I think they should have ended up together, anyway.”
Percy laughs, loudly and adorably. “Oh, yeah. The sexual tension they’ve got going on is insane.”
“Right?”
“Well.” I settle further against him, and he drapes his arm around my shoulder. “Not everyone can end up as happy as we have.”
He hums and kisses my head. “Do you really have to rehearse most of our break? I’ll miss you.”
“I need to catch up, darling! It’s all for a good cause.”
“Hmm. Well, I’ll be here for any free moment you’d want to spend with me.”
“I’m glad. And after the show is done, I’ll be ready for the role of my life.”
“Which is?”
“Being a good boyfriend to you.”
His face mellows completely. He pauses the movie and puts the laptop aside to wrap his arms around me. “I know you will,” he whispers in my ear. “And I’ll do what I can to make you as happy as possible. Because you deserve it.”
And when he says it, I believe it.