Semira
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Sam finds Jack sitting on the floor behind one of the shelves in the library, head in his hands. “Hey,” he says, quiet.
Jack jumps anyway, barely turns to face Sam before drawing his knees up tighter against himself and wrapping both arms around them, hiding his face. “I’m fine,” he says. “Just...”
“I’m not,” Sam whispers. "It's okay if you're not, either."
Jack’s hands loosen. His head rises. The look in his eyes (raw terror and confusion and self-loathing) is one Sam knows all too well.
In other words... After the events of 14.01, Sam, exhausted and unable to sleep, has an honest talk with Jack about being human. Maybe it helps them both. Maybe there's something to this family thing, after all. Needless to say, spoilers abound. Proceed with caution.
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Dean's heavy footfalls on the porch are a death knell. All Sam feels is relief.
He crashes into the house before Bobby can open the door. Eyes closed, Sam hears a ragged, choked, "Where is he, Bobby? Where's Sammy?"
It shouldn't hurt this much, the way that old name slides off Dean's tongue like it still belongs there. Dean probably thinks Sam's dead. He wouldn't pick up any calls from Bobby after the first. He doesn't know the truth is infinitely worse.
Sam imagines this will be the last time he'll hear that name from his brother's lips. He wants to cherish it, right up until he feels the cold steel of a machete against his neck.
In other words: Sequel to 'Til Human Voices Wake Us. Sam wakes from the agonizing effects of the cure to a darker world. Dean finds out what happened, and the cruel voicemail he didn't actually leave on Sam's phone comes into play.
Series
- Part 2 of And We Drown [ Vampire!Sam AU ]
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Sam doesn't bother explaining, just tips his chin to let Dean see the livid bruising where the witch's doll strangled him.
Dean hisses. "Jesus, Sam." Callused fingertips run down his neck, lingering over the mottled marks and exerting just the tiniest, fluttering bit of pressure before returning to the wheel. When Sam glances over, his brother is staring at the road again, too intent to be casual. "I guess I know why you didn't mention it, but... man, you gotta let me know if you're really hurting. There's a line when it comes to this kind of thing. A little sore throat is on the sure, okay side of the line, and my-throat-is-swelling-closed-'cause-I-got-freakin'-strangled-nearly-to-death is on the tell me right the hell away side."
In other words... Placed after the end of 12.20, when Sam doesn't wake up to Dean frantically calling his name. Sam isn't okay, Dean isn't okay, and there's a laundry list a mile long of reasons why. Sam talks. Dean listens. Actual meaningful conversation happens. Sam might sleep in Dean's bed. There was too much pain and too little casual affection and care this episode, honestly. Needless to say, spoilers abound. Proceed with caution.
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[Endverse!AU] After his phone call with Dean in “The End,” Sam is exhausted. Still recovering from his near-relapse when hunters Reggie Hull and Tim Janklow tried to force him to drink demon blood and unwilling to fall into bed because Lucifer is waiting in his head, Sam sets off running.
He runs straight into the end of the world, where Zachariah tells him that this is where his choices will inevitably lead him unless he plays his part. Sam finds unexpected allies in the survivors at Camp Chitaqua, and maybe―just maybe―there's still reason for hope. Maybe they won't always wind up here. Not if Sam has his say.
In other words: BAMF!Sam does not know when to give up. I've always thought the end!verse needed more Sam. Plus some much-needed sorta-reconciliation between 2009!Sam and Endverse!Dean, because reasons.
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Bars make Sam think of November 2nd, how John always spent the anniversary of Mary's death as far away from Sam as he could get. Sometimes, when he came home, red-eyed and saturated with the odor of cheap beer, he'd look at Sam like he didn't even know him, and he'd start to say something, spit out "You—" before he bit his tongue and buried his face in a pillow.
Sam doesn't have many good memories of bars, but maybe he can make some. Brady orders beer and Sam orders ginger ale, much to Brady's amusement.
"It's too early for me. Later," Sam says, and leaves it at that.
Brady just shrugs and throws back a third of his drink like he was born to do it.
In other words... Right before Thanksgiving break of his sophomore year, Sam follows Brady to a bar. A part of him knows he shouldn't involve himself in other people's business, but he can't help it—he can't ignore the unfairness of it. He never could have expected what would come afterward, though.
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A collection of stories in which the brothers are emotionally repressed and don't really realize how much the other loves them. There are so many heart-wrenching near-misses in the show where they're just inches away from actually talking about the things that are really important and don't. Maybe they can't. There are some things you can only say when no one is listening, others you can't say at all, and some that just don't come out quite like you mean them. Maybe one day the Winchesters will say something precisely how they mean it with no posturing or lies or cruel insinuations to preserve their own frail self-image.
Maybe they will. But that day is not today.
tl;dr: Independent oneshots strung together by the theme of emotionally-constipated Winchesters. Basically, awkward attempts, abject failures, and near-misses at communicating their feelings about their deep, abiding fraternal life-partnership.- Words:
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Meng’s messages to Jinling and Jingyan are short and carefully edited. He writes about the skirmishes that lead to battles and the battles that lead to stalemates. He writes about the snow, how it drifts in the valleys and low places, how it melts beneath the sun and freezes again during the night. He writes about his generals, his lieutenants, and his captains. He writes about his strategist.
He writes, Mei Changsu is a skilled tactician. His insights have led to profitable battles with low casualty rates. He silently mouths to himself, He can no longer ride a horse. I don’t know how he will travel back to Jinling, and then writes, With Mei Changsu’s assistance, we will win this war quickly and with lower costs than anticipated.
He says to himself, “Mei Changsu is the cost,” and then covers his mouth with his hand, the scales of his gauntlet pricking at his skin.
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Meng spends a cold winter caught in a war with two fronts--the Greater Yu army on one front, and a dying strategist on the other. It's basically ten thousand some-odd words of Meng-feels, Meng&Lin Shu bromance, and the slow breaking of a man's heart as he watches his best friend die.
Bookmarked by Semira
29 Jan 2019
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For the Oh Sam Hurt vs. Comfort Meme Prompt Stigmata
By day, The Stigmatic blesses The Faithful. By night, Sam Winchester suffers.
Spoilers Up To 13x19
Series
- Part 1 of Touched By God-So It Goes
Bookmarked by Semira
01 Jun 2018
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He hadn't done this in what felt like eons. The last time he had, he'd been Sam from Before. Sam from Now was not the same person, not really. They shared the same body, same mind, same history, but Before-Sam and Now-Sam were separated by a gaping, yawning chasm that the devil called home. And Now-Sam was alone in a back alley, struggling to keep his hands from shaking, and wondering if he could ever be Before-Sam even for ten minutes.
There are very few things Sam doesn't tell Dean about.
But there are things.Bookmarked by Semira
10 Aug 2016
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'Truth told, it makes Dean a little uneasy. Sometimes when they’re driving he looks across the car, sees Sam crammed awkward and uncomfortable into his seat, and wonders how much longer it is likely to be before his brother outgrows the Impala altogether.'
It's February on the Maine coast. John's away, Sam's sulking and Dean doesn't know how to fix it. Oh, and there might just be a case in town.
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Bookmarked by Semira
05 Oct 2015
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Dean asks Sam what hallucinations the Werther box showed him.