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Inspired by the truly awful/incredible Hallmark movies I absolutely love to watch every year, I wrote this a while back so there are some characters not in the show anymore, Paddy and Chas are still together, and Rhona's just getting it awn with Pete (that massive huge great hunk of a man).
Vanessa Woodfield comes to Emmerdale to open a pop-up Christmas village in the hopes of winning the most Christmassy Village In The Known Hemisphere Competition (or something like it). The local pub landlady is intrigued - as well as being a grump of the highest proportions. Can Charity find her Christmas cheer before the season's out? Can Vanessa help Emmerdale win the competition? IF ONLY WE KNEW HOW THESE THINGS TURN OUT!?!
No apologies for cases of diabetes developed after reading this story.
Happy Christmas!
Bookmarked by superfluouslyme
23 Jan 2026
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Vanessa is totally straight. Totally. So what if she's never had an orgasm with a man? That happens, right?
Right.
Based on that tumblr post. Rhona hooks Vanessa up with a very willing Charity Dingle.
Bookmarked by superfluouslyme
20 Jan 2026
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A series of soft mornings featuring Charity, Vanessa, and their boys.
Bookmarked by superfluouslyme
19 Jan 2026
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Based on the spoilers for next week, a short, five part story building towards The Swarla Reunion.
Bookmarked by superfluouslyme
19 Jan 2026
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It’s his father.
He recognizes him quickly - the high forehead, the thin nose. He has the same features - he’s studied them in the washroom mirror for hours, wondering where they’d come from.
“Your father, I reckon,” Ma had said, shrugging her shoulders. She’s pressed her thumb to his pointed chin. “No matter. You’re all ‘Ness on the inside, aren’t you?”
He’s all Kirin Kotchea on the outside, though.
Bookmarked by superfluouslyme
13 Jan 2026

