Chapter Text
The alarm blared yet again, and Hikaru let out a lengthy groan before rolling over and hitting the snooze button for the third time in a row.
“Hikaru, it’s Saturday; why’d you set an alarm…” grumbled Kaoru, who ran his fingers through his hair to brush it out of his face.
The elder twin mumbled something to himself and sat up. “I don’t want to sleep all day. Besides, I want to make sure I have time to do stuff before we head over to Haruhi’s. I can’t remember where I put my bio textbook…”
Kaoru sat up, rubbing out a knot in his neck. “What time are we supposed to go over there?”
“I told her we’d be there around eleven,” Hikaru said as he started to go through his phone. “I’m sure she also needs time to get her shit together…”
“Mm, about that…” Kaoru looked up at the ceiling. “...I think I’m gonna sit this one out.”
“What? Why?” asked Hikaru, turning to look at his brother. “It’s not like you don’t have finals to study for.”
“Yeah, but we have over a week until the actual exams. This was just the only day she said we could study together.” Kaoru sighed. “I actually wanted to try to see what’s going on.”
Hikaru raised an eyebrow. “There’s a lot going on.”
“Which is exactly why I want to try to get it straight in my head. I know Kyoya has been looking into it, and I want to find out what exactly he knows.”
“And I do, too, but we already told Haruhi we’d study for finals with her today. The both of us.”
Kaoru sighed, hesitating. “We can’t keep doing this forever, you know.”
Hikaru furrowed his brow. "Doing what?" he asked cautiously.
Kaoru briefly looked at his twin, but just as quickly broke eye contact and turned away. "We don't have to spend every waking moment together. It's…okay for us to want to do our own thing sometimes. And don't you think this is the perfect time for that, since everything's changing so fast? I mean, Haruhi and Tamaki are about to have a baby, and Honey-senpai and Mori-senpai are graduating…"
"But…" Hikaru frowned. "…we agreed we'd go together."
"And it's okay if we don't. She's not going to kill us." Kaoru got out of bed and went straight to the dresser on the opposite side of the room.
Hikaru sat up but remained in bed, staring at the wall as he thought. He wasn't sure if he should say anything, especially since he didn't want to make everything worse.
Almost as if Kaoru could read his twin's mind, he abruptly stopped dressing and turned around to face Hikaru. "Wait a second. You don't want to visit her alone!"
Hikaru met his brother's gaze, and the two stared at each other.
When Hikaru didn't have an immediate response, Kaoru continued. "Is it possible you have feelings for her that you've been pushing aside this entire time, and you're worried that being alone with her will bring all those feelings to the surface?"
They continued to stare, Hikaru's face slowly growing red as he realized that, as per usual, his brother knew exactly what was up.
"I realized you liked her when we went to Karuizawa," Kaoru smiled playfully and pulled a shirt out of one of the drawers. "Why else would you have gotten pissed when her old friend showed up?"
Hikaru grumbled. "I guess I'm just…mad at myself," he admitted. "Like, I know I've always subconsciously realized it, but I wish I had actually realized it before all of this happened, and had actually done something about it? And there were so many opportunities, too… Like that date in Karuizawa, and I kind of hoped it would go somewhere but I was being an ass so it didn’t, and then at the end of the summer we went back to Okinawa and she got pregnant, and not by me—”
“Hold up,” said Kaoru, cutting him off. “Do you actually wish it was yours?”
“Oh fuck no!” exclaimed Hikaru, horrified. “I don’t even want to think about having kids for like, ten more years minimum.” He breathed a frustrated sigh. “I’m bringing it up because it’s Tamaki. Looking back, ever since the beginning, it’s always been him. I don’t even know why I thought I ever had a chance, and at this point…” He sighed. “…there’s no chance."
The two were silent, each absorbing Hikaru's words. He was right, and they both knew it. The door had been shut before either of them could even reach for the handle.
"And why is this coming up now?" Kaoru asked. "I mean, we've known her for almost a year at this point. Why now?"
"I don't…know," admitted Hikaru, "and I think that's why it's bothering me so much. Maybe I've finally processed that they're actually having a baby soon? Like, sure, they told us last fall, but now she's actually, visibly pregnant, and…it's weird. Like, they…did things."
Kaoru immediately made a retching noise and chucked a pair of boxers straight at Hikaru. "Ew, don't put that image in my head! I don't want to think about our friends doing that!"
"Hey, don't throw your underwear at me!" Hikaru wadded up the boxers and tossed them back. "Our friends…"
"Yeah, our friends. They're our friends." Kaoru shut a drawer and turned back around, now fully dressed. "Haruhi has never shown any indication she thinks otherwise. You know how the saying goes: if you love something, let it go."
Hikaru groaned and finally got out of bed. "It's so definite, though."
"Her and Tamaki having a baby is also pretty definite."
"I know you're right," grumbled Hikaru. "Let's just put it to rest. I'll study with Haruhi, and you go over to Kyoya's to try to figure out what's up."
Kaoru nodded and smiled. "Sounds like a plan."
Kyoya's eyes opened abruptly, and he immediately began searching for his phone in the tangle of bedsheets. He finally found it—under his leg, of all places—and unlocked it to check for any updates. The first thing that popped up was a low battery alert, so his first order of business was to plug his phone in so it didn't die. Kyoya rolled over to grab the charging cord, being careful to not roll on top of the glasses that had fallen off his face during the night.
"Y'know, it's almost eleven."
Kyoya flinched and immediately sat up straight to find Kaoru lounging at the foot of his bed. "I was wondering if you'd ever wake up."
"Oh my god." Kyoya rubbed his eyes before sliding his glasses onto his face. "How long have you been here?"
Kaoru looked up at the ceiling thoughtfully, kicking his legs playfully. "Hmm…at least an hour, I'd say. Maybe an hour and a half? I wasn't really paying attention to the time; I was trying to avoid your brother, so I was kind of preoccupied. I ended up just coming in through the window."
"The window…?" repeated Kyoya, exasperated. "How did you not set off the security system?"
"Yeah, the last time I came here he kept staring at me and absolutely grilling me with questions about you, and I really didn't feel like dealing with that. It was easier to just avoid him entirely this time." Kaoru ignored Kyoya's question and rolled over so that he was now flat on his back. "What's his deal, anyway?"
Kyoya sighed and finally swung his legs over the edge of the mattress. However Kaoru had managed to evade the Ootori family staff and numerous estate safeguards, he'd figure that out later. "Akito took his high school career so seriously he never did any extracurriculars, and I think he believes I'm not taking my studies as seriously since I am part of a club."
"But you're literally the top student in your class. Why does it matter?"
Kyoya headed for his closet, and Kaoru got off the bed to follow him. "Because my older brothers are just that: older. They have so much more experience than me, and both of them have gone on to do great things." He pulled a shirt off one of the racks. "I'm only in high school; what do I know? According to them, nothing."
Kaoru frowned. "But how—"
"In other words…" Kyoya took off his pajama top and looked back at Kaoru with a sly smile. "…when the time comes, they'll have no idea what's going to hit them."
He finished getting dressed, smiling, while Kaoru processed his words, but his eyes quickly narrowed into a scowl and the smile dropped from his face. "Now, what exactly is so important that it made you sneak into my bedroom on a Saturday morning without telling me ahead of time?"
"Sorry! Sorry!" Kaoru exclaimed in a panic. "Hikaru went to Haruhi's to study for finals, and I'm still confused about what we all talked about earlier this week and wanted to get some clarification!"
Deep down Kyoya was itching to know why the Hitachiins weren't in the same place at the same time, but ultimately it was irrelevant to Kaoru's reason for the visit. "I do think it will be helpful to talk it through," he said, walking down the loft stairs with Kaoru trailing behind him. "But first, let's get something to eat. I can't think on an empty stomach."
Hikaru stared at the front door to the Fujioka apartment, trying to work up the courage to knock on the door. His earlier conversation with Kaoru was bothering him more than he wanted to admit, and he wished he had never even brought it up in the first place. It was completely pointless now, and besides, he had other things to worry about, such as Haruhi asking him why he was there alone.
He finally managed to shove his unwanted thoughts to the back of his brain and knocked on the door. He didn't get any type of response for so long he considered knocking again, but as he brought his hand up, the door suddenly opened, and Hikaru was left open-mouthed.
Haruhi stared at him, dark circles underneath her lifeless eyes and hair barely combed. Her clothes were wrinkled in a way that indicated she probably hadn't worn anything else for the past several days, and Hikaru honestly couldn't tell if they were supposed to be pajamas or were just some horribly mismatched t-shirt and sweatpants.
His reaction could only be summed up by a single sentence: "You look terrible."
"I feel terrible," said Haruhi, letting Hikaru inside and closing the door behind him. "I've been poking around on pregnancy forums the past couple of days, and I'm genuinely astonished that people actually feel good throughout this entire thing. I just feel gross."
Hikaru frowned, his upper lip curling in disgust a bit. "I guess it's different for everyone," he offered, taking off his shoes and sliding on a pair of slippers laid out for guests. "I don't remember it being too bad for our—my—mom when she was pregnant with my sister." He and Haruhi entered the living room, and Hikaru stopped. "Why's the kotatsu out?"
Haruhi avoided eye contact with him and sat down. "I've been cold," she told him in a small voice, draping the table's blanket around her knees. "Where's Kaoru?"
Ah. There it was. "He had some…other stuff to attend to," replied Hikaru, following Haruhi's lead and sitting down on the opposite side of the kotatsu. "He said he feels pretty confident about the test, especially since there's still another week until finals."
"Yeah, sorry about that; my dad has to work the late shift starting next week, so today was the only day we could do it," Haruhi said, reaching for her laptop. "I'm supposed to be meeting with Renge tomorrow, so Sunday's out, too…"
"Wait. You and Renge hang out?"
"Not…really, but we've been texting back and forth some for the past few months. At this point, I'm willing to take any form of human interaction I can get." Haruhi booted up her laptop with a sigh. "But I'm still surprised Kaoru didn't want to come. Is everything okay?"
Hikaru sighed, recalling the conversation he'd had with his brother earlier that morning. For a brief moment he debated being completely honest, letting her know what exactly had transpired earlier, but…
Instead, he smiled, albeit a bit sadly. "Yeah, everything's fine. I talked with Kaoru earlier, and we both realized that while we are twins, it's okay if we want to do our own things sometimes. And since everything's changing, isn't it the perfect time for the two of us to change, too?"
Haruhi briefly pondered his words. He was right, and she knew it—though they'd certainly gotten better about it since she'd first met them, the amount they relied on each other was definitely unhealthy—but she still felt a little sad that she was part of the reason they decided to reevaluate their degree of interdependence.
"Anyway," said Hikaru abruptly, ready to change the subject. "Do you need me to grab your textbook? Or, I brought mine, if it's easier for you to just use that."
"No, I'll just use my notes." Haruhi frowned while she pulled open her assignments tab. "Either way, I'm not too worried about the final. I've been doing fine on everything." She flipped her laptop around for Hikaru to see.
He squinted at the assignments' scores, and once he processed the numbers his eyes widened. "Holy shit, you got a 98 on the quiz from a few weeks ago? I didn't think anyone in the class scored any higher than like a 92! I sure as hell didn't…"
"Really? I didn't think it was that bad," Haruhi said, turning her laptop back around.
Hikaru rolled his eyes. "Okay, scholarship student," he retorted dryly, a playful grin on his face.
Haruhi smiled wryly, but the smile left her lips as quickly as it appeared. "Either way, even if I don't do well it won't matter that much, since there's a chance I won't be coming back to Ouran."
Hikaru froze, staring at her in shock. "What?!"
"Yeah, the lawyer we've been talking with stopped by the other day. She told me that Tamaki's dad has started the takeover of the Suoh Group, but Tamaki's grandmother still has some paperwork left to sign to officially turn the company over to him. I don't know if anything else has happened because I haven't heard anything from the lawyer since then, but she told me that until the Suoh Group is one hundred percent in his hands, there's still a chance Tamaki's grandmother could do…anything. And she doesn't want me to come back to Ouran next school year."
Scowling, Hikaru stared at the floor. "That old hag…"
"I don't think Tamaki would appreciate you calling his grandmother an old hag." Haruhi pulled up the final exam study guide on her laptop before looking up at Hikaru with an unimpressed glare.
He looked at her. "Tamaki's not here, and I'm just reiterating what she is: an old hag." He started to unpack the bag he'd brought along, and placed his own laptop on the table. "Do you have any idea what you're going to do?"
Haruhi broke eye contact with him and stared at her laptop screen, eyes unfocused. "Yeah, I've been…weighing my options. Since the baby will be born after the next school year has already started, I'm not too sure what the logistics of transferring would be." She stopped and looked back up at Hikaru. "Sorry, I'm thinking out loud here…"
"It's okay; I get it."
"But think about it: the plan was for me to start in-person classes at Ouran again in May or whenever's most convenient, and the curriculum would still be the same as the online one, so it'd be easy for me to transition back into in-person classes. But if I went to a completely different school, how would that work? Or, if I'm not doing online classes for the first month or so of next year, would another school even let me start in the middle of the term, or would I have to wait until next April? Would I have to take another entrance exam?"
While Hikaru struggled to think of a response, Haruhi continued. "If it's my only option…should I transfer to Lobelia?"
Any appropriate response he'd previously thought up went completely out the window. "What the fuck?! Why the hell would you even consider doing that?!"
Haruhi frowned and sulked at his remark. "I already have an 'in,' so I know they'd probably take me as a student," she replied quietly. "I don't know, I feel like I'm running out of options here. If whatever's up with Tamaki and his family doesn't get fixed, do I have any other options? I can't not graduate high school…"
"But it will get fixed," said Hikaru. "It's going to. It has to."
"And I want to agree with you, but after speaking with the lawyer…I don't know anymore." She sighed deeply and continued to sulk as she adjusted the blanket around her waist.
Hikaru wanted to tell her she was being stupid and overthinking everything, but he did have to admit she had some valid points. Either way, he actually wanted to get to doing what he'd come over there to do in the first place, but Haruhi still had more to say.
"'Cause if it doesn't get fixed, then there's a pretty high chance I won't be able to finish high school, and then literally everything I've worked for will have gone down the drain, and I don't know what other ways—"
"Stop," said Hikaru, cutting her off, "you're starting to sound like Tamaki." But as soon as those words left his mouth, Haruhi's eyes started welling with tears and he realized he'd fucked up.
Fuck fuck fuck. "Okay, let's not think about that now," he told her as gently as he could. "We'll get there if we get there." He turned around to reach for his textbook, but stopped when he realized there was something he should probably take care of before they got too engrossed in studying. "Let me use the bathroom before we actually get started."
Haruhi nodded rapidly, also eager for a subject change, and Hikaru took that as his cue to scuttle to the bathroom. As soon as he went inside, he locked the door behind him and pulled out his phone, heading straight for his text message thread with Kaoru.
This is really bad.
Kyoya and Kaoru had relocated to the sitting area and were seated on the couch, munching on some pastries a butler had delivered earlier. Kyoya had pulled out his laptop and set it on the coffee table, close enough for Kaoru to get a quick peek if needed.
"I've been poking around in the Ootori Medical files," said Kyoya, typing away as he pulled up the appropriate database. "I've been able to find some things that are relevant, but there are still pieces missing."
Kaoru scooted closer to Kyoya on the couch to get a better look at the screen. "Wait, how much are you able to view, exactly?"
"Everything." He typed something and angled the laptop towards Kaoru.
Kaoru squinted as he looked at the screen. "Wait, is this Haruhi's medical file?!"
Kyoya nodded nonchalantly and took another bite of cornetto. "How else did you think I've been keeping tabs on things?"
"Huh, that makes sense," said Kaoru, nodding slowly. "But how exactly is going through people's personal information helping you figure things out?"
"I'm not just going through people's personal information. Look at this," said Kyoya, opening another subsection of the database system. "Here's where all the records of every single clinical trial associated with Ootori Medical are kept. I can see every single document, test result, contract for each trial—" He clicked on a random folder, which led to even more folders separated into sections he described, then clicked on a few more to prove his point. "—except for this one."
Kaoru watched as Kyoya clicked on another folder. Instead of immediately opening like the others did, a "Password" window popped up.
"See? This one—and only this one—is password protected."
"Have you tried guessing what the password is?" asked Kaoru. Kyoya raised an eyebrow and shot him an unamused look. "Never mind, that's a stupid question."
"I've tried everything I can think of," Kyoya continued. "The password I'd normally use to access things in the database, my family members' birthdays… I even tried the password I accidentally came across when I was in middle school and still haven't forgotten for some reason, probably because my father wasn't too happy with me…" He paused. "I also tried my own name, my brothers' names, my sister's name, my father's name, my mother's name…"
Kaoru stared at the laptop screen in thought, then slowly turned his head to look at Kyoya. "What about…Tamaki's mother's name?"
Kyoya made eye contact with him but otherwise didn't react, and for a moment Kaoru was afraid he'd unintentionally misstepped. But instead, Kyoya went straight back to the laptop and began typing away.
However, as soon as he hit "enter," more text popped up: Password incorrect. "Maybe it's a capitalization issue…" He tried again, first in sentence case, then in all caps, then all lowercase. Each attempt was met with the same result of an incorrect password.
"Her first name is hyphenated, right? Maybe you could try it without the hyphen," Kaoru suggested.
Kyoya tried the hyphen-less name, pulling out all the same stops as before, but each time Password incorrect resulted. His eyes narrowed and he leaned forward, resting his hand on his chin. "And her surname has a space in it, too…" He continued to stare at the screen, completely silent. "Why must French people have names that make setting them as a password so difficult?"
The two silently went over options in their head—they were so close yet so far, and the task of guessing a password seemed impossible. But while Kyoya was still contemplating, a thought popped into Kaoru's head.
"What if it wasn't her name," he suggested. "Like, the letters that make up her name aren't the password. What if each letter corresponded to a number?"
Kyoya considered his words. "Mm, continue."
"Like… 'A' equals '1,' 'B' equals '2,' 'C' equals '3,' and so on."
Kyoya immediately opened a blank note, and he and Kaoru went to putting together a long list of corresponding letters and numbers. After several minutes and several rechecks of their work, they were met with a very long string of numbers.
"Okay, I'm going to need you to read these back to me," Kyoya told Kaoru, opening the database back up.
Kaoru nodded. "I'm ready when you are."
Kyoya listened intently and meticulously typed them into the textbox while Kaoru read the numbers out loud. Once he was done, the two stared at the textbox, now filled with dots obfuscating the real text. Kyoya purposefully hit the enter key, and the two held their breath as they awaited the result.
Nothing happened for several seconds, and for a moment they thought their attempt had failed. But instead, numerous subfolders and links to PDFs popped up.
"Yes!" Kaoru cheered, and Kyoya breathed a sigh of relief as he started to browse through the files.
"Here, look at this," he told Kaoru, adjusting the angle of the laptop. "Phase 2 study to evaluate the efficacy of new drug in study participants with moderately to severely active systemic lupus erythematosus. This is it! This is what my father and Tamaki's father have been discussing!"
Kaoru hummed thoughtfully, reading the words on the screen. "What exactly does 'phase 2' mean?"
"Phase 2 is where they determine effective dosages. It means whatever they're doing is working; they just need to fine-tune it." He began to scroll through the newly accessed files. "This is a lot; I think I'm going to have to spend most of the weekend going over this."
Right then, Kaoru's phone buzzed with a text message. He leaned over and grabbed it off the coffee table, immediately furrowing his brow when he read the message.
"What is it?" asked Kyoya.
"It's from Hikaru," he told him. "'This is really bad…'"
Kyoya continued to stare at him, indicating for him to explain further.
"Hikaru went to study for finals with Haruhi, and—" Another message came through, and Kaoru's eyes widened when he read it. "Apparently Tamaki's dad has taken over the Suoh Group, but…" He paused, processing the rest of the message. "His grandmother doesn't want Haruhi to come back to Ouran."
Kyoya scooted closer to Kaoru on the couch to try to read the message for himself. "Tamaki's father is now the CEO of the Suoh Group, and his grandmother wants Haruhi to leave?!"
"Apparently—wait, he's typing again." They watched the typing bubble for several seconds until a message appeared. "'This sucks and I'm mad.' I guess that's one way to put it…"
Kaoru continued to stare at his phone, then sighed. "You know, Hikaru and I were talking this morning."
"About this whole situation, or…?"
"Sort of." Kaoru hesitated before continuing. "Basically, he admitted he's had a crush on Haruhi this whole time, but it wasn't until recently he actually acknowledged it, and he doesn't see a point in doing anything about it now… It's just weird and unfortunate."
"'Weird and unfortunate' is a great way to describe it," said Kyoya, adjusting his glasses. "I'm saying this as someone who's completely impartial because I don't like her that way and never have: is there any point in him doing anything about it, though?"
Kaoru sighed. "No, and I'm saying that as someone who is partial because I do like her that way, too."
Kyoya considered his words. "Does Hikaru know?"
"No," Kaoru told him, shaking his head. "I thought about saying something when he brought it up, but…it wouldn't do any good. It'd just make him feel worse, especially since he already feels bad enough that, if we're viewing it as a competition, Tamaki 'won.'" He paused. "But one thing I still can't understand is…why hasn't Tamaki realized it yet? At this point it's painfully obvious."
Kyoya closed the laptop and leaned back on the couch. "I've actually been thinking about that a lot lately," he said. "Right now, my main theory is that it's a sort of trauma response."
"Trauma response…?"
"Think about everything he's grown up around and how…unconventional it is. It doesn't matter how much his parents love each other; their relationship is still frowned upon by his grandmother, so they've had to go about maintaining it in an extremely unconventional way. And because of that, he gravitates towards a more traditional and rigid family structure. He has such a perfect picture of what the 'ideal family' should look like, and everything he's experienced is…not that."
Kaoru stared at him. "Is that why he'd constantly shove us and the rest of the Host Club into weird family roles?"
"Exactly," said Kyoya. "Though, he's really backed off of that since Haruhi got pregnant, which leads me to my next point… His and Haruhi's relationship is also unconventional, just in different ways. The pregnancy makes everything so much more complicated, but even if that weren't a factor, I think that Tamaki subconsciously thinks that if he actually acknowledged the romantic feelings he has for Haruhi, everything would fall apart, or they'd end up in a situation like his parents." He paused before taking a deep breath. "Of course, that's just a theory. He could just actually be extremely stupid, which would be really sad."
They sat there in silence, considering Kyoya's hypothesis. Kaoru had to admit, it was a very solid supposition, but there was still one thing he was hung up on.
"Kyoya," he said, "for them, everything has fallen apart."
Kyoya turned to look at Kaoru, a sly smile on his lips. "And I think it can be put back together…with our help."
Back at the Fujioka apartment, Haruhi and Hikaru were immersed in studying for their final exam in biology. Haruhi had to steer the conversation back to the appropriate subject several times whenever Hikaru decided to make a joke, but despite this they breezed through the first half of the exam study guide. Both felt more prepared than ever—until one particular section.
"These questions are starting to make my head hurt," whined Hikaru, trying yet again to maneuver the discussion towards something a little more fun. "How about we take a break and do something else for a little bit?"
"How about we not do that and finish what we've already started?" sighed Haruhi. "Look, we have two more questions until we're done with this section, then we can take a break. Okay?"
Hikaru groaned, but understood he probably shouldn't argue with his hormonal and already somewhat irritated friend. "Fine."
She turned back to the study guide. "Okay, 'A pea plant is heterozygous for both seed shape and seed color. Another pea plant is heterozygous for seed shape and homozygous for yellow seed color. Capital S is the allele for—'"
"Nope!" Hikaru immediately threw down his pencil. "Not dealing with that! I can do two sets of alleles, and that's it. Not even going to touch four."
Haruhi frowned. "It's on the study guide, so that means it's going to be on the test. Are you just going to leave the question blank when it comes up?"
"I don't know; depends on how much I'm able to do before my head explodes."
"It's not that difficult if you break it down," said Haruhi, reaching across the table to grab Hikaru's pencil and sheet of paper. "See, all you have to do is write out the alleles for the first parent plant, which, in this case, would be capital S, lowercase S—"
"Sorry for interrupting again, but genuinely, how the fuck do you do it?"
Haruhi stopped writing. "Do what?"
"Like, just…" Hikaru hesitated as he struggled to find the best way to put it. "You're still the best student in the class, even with everything that's going on…"
"Yeah." Haruhi started twirling the pencil in between her fingers. "I guess, at the beginning, it was easy enough to block it out and pretend everything was fine, at least long enough for me to focus on school, but…" Her eyes traveled downward, and she slowly lifted her free hand to rest on her stomach. "It's kind of hard to ignore now. At this point, I think studying keeps my mind off of things. It's not like I really have anything else I can do right now, anyway…"
She allowed herself to focus on the tiny movements for several seconds before abruptly snapping herself out of it. "Okay, we're literally almost done with this part. Just let me walk you through it, alright?"
Nearly ten minutes and several suppressed yelling attempts later, the two had finally finished the question. "That wasn't too bad, was it?" suggested Haruhi, looking back at the several Punnett squares she and Hikaru had scribbled down. "This one was kind of weird because there's no green peas in the end since yellow was the dominant trait, but it's probably good there are some weird questions on the study guide."
Hikaru nodded in acknowledgement. "Yeah. Nothing's worse than getting thrown a curveball question during the test…"
He paused, unsure if they should just move on to the next question or if he should ask a question that had been bugging him for the past half hour or so. But he quickly decided he wouldn't be able to completely focus on the next question if he didn't ask. Screw it. "Hey, since we've been on the topic for this entire section of the study guide, I've been wondering… Who do you think the baby will look like?"
Haruhi thought for a moment. "I don't…know," she admitted, staring at the table. "I haven't really thought about it. They'll probably look like a combination of me and Tamaki. That's kind of how that works."
Hikaru frowned. "Yeah, but since he's half, I wonder if that'll, like…affect anything."
"You're making it sound like him being half is a disease or something," said Haruhi. "Even though he looks a lot more like his mom than his dad, he's still half Japanese, though, and I'm fully Japanese, so…I imagine the baby will look pretty Japanese." She held her stomach, a bit sadly. "To be honest, though, part of me hopes they won't look too much like Tamaki…"
Hikaru scoffed. "Yeah, imagine going through all that only for your kid to look nothing like you…"
"No, imagine the father of your child no longer being in your life and having to look at someone who looks just like him every single day." Hikaru's eyes widened and he puckered his lips, trying his hardest to not react. "If things don't work out…even if they do get fixed, but not until after the baby's born… I don't know; it'll just make me sad. We agreed we'd be doing this together, as friends, and…I want to do it together."
Hikaru was nearly speechless. This literally keeps getting worse and worse. He ran his tongue along the edge of his teeth while he tried to form a coherent response.
"I get it." He shrugged his shoulders sympathetically. "Yeah, that…that would be hard." He hesitated—once he said the words, there was no going back—but he knew it needed to be said. "But—and I don't want you to take this the wrong way—if looking at your child, who may or may not even look like their father, would make you sad…don't you think that you might miss their father in a way that means you're more than just friends?"
"Hikaru, that has nothing to do with it. I'm sad because we agreed to do this together, and now I'm not sure we'll be able to," she scowled. "Just…the thought of having to do this by myself is scary."
He honestly wasn't sure if his comment had just gone over Haruhi's head, or if she was just willfully ignorant, but that didn't really matter since she seemed to be legitimately hurting. All of a sudden, his earlier problems seemed trivial as he contemplated her dilemma. He didn't even need to think about it. She didn't need someone to throw something confusing into the mix; she needed a friend.
"Even if the worst case scenario happens, you wouldn't be doing it by yourself," he told her gently. "You'd still have the rest of the Host Club. I don't mean to speak for the others, but we're your friends. We're going to help you, no matter what." He paused, starting to crack a smile. "Maybe I could babysit sometime; take a little off your plate."
A grin stretched across Haruhi's face and she immediately started laughing. "Absolutely not. I'm not sure I trust you with a baby."
"What? I literally have a baby sister."
"That's completely different."
"Not really."
"Well, how many diapers have you changed?" Haruhi's smile transformed into a smug one.
Hikaru blanked. "Someone else usually takes care of that," he answered quietly.
"Well, you're going to have to get some practice before I trust you with my child."
"Fine, fine." Hikaru chuckled and started to get back to the study guide, but stopped. "But really, I mean it. If, God forbid, Tamaki is out of the picture for whatever reason, I'll help however you want me to." He stared at the sheet of paper, eyes unfocused. "Even changing diapers."
Haruhi smiled brightly, and Hikaru noticed the sadness she carried seemed to be starting to melt away. "Thank you," she told him earnestly. "That really means a lot."
They smiled at each other for several seconds before Haruhi clapped her hands together. "Alright, we're almost done with the study guide. Let's do this."
Both Hitachiins were exhausted by the time they returned home. Despite all that was on his mind, Kaoru was nearly bouncing with excitement, and he couldn't wait to tell his brother what he'd learned. For Hikaru, however, visiting Haruhi had put him in an exceptionally bad mood. He hoped Kaoru had a lot to talk about so he could avoid the subject.
"So did you learn anything new from Kyoya?" asked Hikaru.
Kaoru took off his jacket. "Oh boy, did I," he said with a raise of his brows and a slight smile. "We may have successfully hacked into a clinical trial database and learned a little more about the drug trial Tamaki's parents are involved in."
"Holy shit," Hikaru laughed. "Yeah, you definitely should have headed over there."
"It was a ton of info, so Kyoya's going to read over as much of it as he can this weekend." Walking over to the wardrobe and opening it, he removed a hanger and hung the jacket up. "How was Haruhi?"
Hikaru opened his mouth as he tried to formulate a sentence that would most accurately describe their friend's current state of being. "Mm, yeah, not great," he said, a hint of irritation in his tone. "Is pre-partum depression a thing? 'Cause I'm pretty sure she has it. No matter how many times I reassured her that we—the Host Club—would make sure everything works out, she still wouldn't stop freaking out. She's…actually panicking."
"Haruhi's panicking?" repeated Kaoru, shutting the wardrobe door a little too aggressively.
"I think it's worse than that," Hikaru continued. "Actual thing she said to me: She hopes the baby won't look too much like Tamaki because she doesn't want to be sad every time she looks at them."
"Oh my god." Kaoru walked over to the bed the two shared and sat down on the edge. "That's bad."
"Yeah, that pretty much confirms it. She likes Tamaki. Like, a lot." Hikaru sighed. "And I even brought it up, because what other reason would make looking at her own child something sad, but… She denied it. Insisted they're just friends."
"That's not really 'just friends' behavior."
Hikaru sat down next to his brother with a sigh. "No, it's not. And I know she's not stupid, but…why doesn't she see it?"
"Kyoya and I wondered the same thing about Tamaki," Kaoru said, causing Hikaru to look up at him. "Though, Tamaki is stupid sometimes. Kyoya's theory is that Tamaki's afraid to acknowledge his feelings for her because he's scared everything will collapse if he does."
Hikaru blinked. "Kaoru, we're long past that. Shit hit the fan weeks ago."
"Tell that to Tamaki, not me." Kaoru threw his hands up in surrender. "But don't you realize? They both like each other, but neither one of them sees it."
"Yeah, 'cause they're stubborn."
"So, we need to help them!" exclaimed Kaoru, jumping up. "We've gotta help them realize their feelings for each other."
"But how?" asked Hikaru with a roll of his eyes. "Haruhi's not at school, and Tamaki's kind of in isolation right now."
"I saw the wheels turning in Kyoya's brain when I was there earlier. He's definitely planning something, and it sounded like he wanted us to help. Honey-senpai and Mori-senpai, too." He looked at Hikaru with wide eyes, then sat back down. "We aren't doing ourselves or them any favors if we don't help. It's not like Haruhi's going to change her mind, anyway."
After several moments of silence, Hikaru finally spoke. "Yeah, I agree. And, like you said earlier, things are changing. All we can do now is welcome those changes, and…I've been thinking about it. And I think that starts with us." He looked his brother in the eyes and offered a bittersweet smile. "How would you feel about us getting separate rooms?"
Ultimately, Kaoru smiled back, reaching for Hikaru's hand and giving it a squeeze. "I think it's a good first step."
After Hikaru left that afternoon, Haruhi felt emotionally drained. She didn't feel like doing anything and had spent the rest of the afternoon playing on her phone or laying in bed. Not any different from how she'd been spending the past couple of weeks, but now there was the added load of what Hikaru had said to her.
"…don't you think that you might miss their father in a way that means you're more than just friends?"
The words kept bouncing around in her head, and the longer she thought about it the more confused she became. When everything started, they'd agreed to do it as friends—nothing more, nothing less. Even after she moved in with Tamaki, even as they grew closer as the pregnancy progressed, she kept reminding herself that co-parenting on friendly terms was the end goal, even if it would be a little awkward. After all, hadn't they agreed to not get married just because of the baby?
If that were the case, though, then why did everything feel so…bad?
"Welp, we're not going to think about that right now," Haruhi said, giving the top of her stomach a gentle pat. "Let's see if there's anything interesting on TV…"
She clicked the remote and the TV blipped on. The current channel was running some sort of high school drama series, and Haruhi decided it was interesting enough as she put down the remote. On the TV, two students stood in a school hallway, a scene not unlike any other school-focused drama she'd seen before. But then the camera cut to a shot of their faces, switching back and forth between the two characters as they spoke.
And it was oddly familiar.
"Tomoaki-kun, before you leave, I need to tell you something… I love you…"
"Haruna, I've been waiting to hear you say that…"
"Nope, nope, nope!" Haruhi frantically reached for the remote and turned the TV off just as quickly as she had turned it on. "Nope. No."
Before she could do anything else, the front door lock clicked and her father opened the door. "Haruhi! I'm home!" he called in his typical sing-song manner.
The remote escaped her grasp, and she struggled to get a good grip on it as Ranka walked into the kitchen. "Hi Dad," she said with a nervous laugh, carefully placing the remote down on the kotatsu.
Ranka frowned, setting down a bag on the table. "Is everything okay? You seem flustered."
"I'm fine!" Haruhi gave her father a slightly pained smile. "I had a busy day. Lots of studying."
"Well, I have to show you what I bought on the way home," Ranka told her, turning around and going through the bag. "I saw it in the window and just had to have it!"
He turned back around and revealed a small stuffed duck made of terrycloth. "Isn't it adorable? I thought it'd be perfect for the baby!"
Haruhi's face started to fall, and she had to put effort into keeping up her smile. "That's nice."
"Oh, and I was so excited to find these!" Ranka continued, pulling out a set of bottles. "Your mother and I swore by this exact brand when you were a baby. I'm surprised the design hasn't changed in sixteen years! I'm not sure what your feeding plans are, but it wouldn't be a bad idea to have a few on hand just in case. I also saw some other things I thought would be good to get, but I wanted to check with you first."
"Yeah."
Ranka set the bottles on the table. "Haruhi, are you sure you're okay? Did something happen today?"
"No, no!" exclaimed Haruhi, now very obviously flustered. "Just studying!"
Ranka frowned. "If you say so. You just don't seem very excited about what I bought."
"No, thank you for getting them, it's just…" Haruhi hesitated. "We already have some things; they're just at Tamaki's house."
"Haruhi," Ranka sighed, walking into the living area and sitting down next to his daughter. "We need to have supplies on hand here." He gently put his hands on her shoulders. "The baby will be here before you know it. And unfortunately, as much as we want it to, we can't count on everything going back to the way it was. I know you don't want to think about it, but you need to be prepared to do it without him, at least for the first little bit. Just in case."
Haruhi wasn't sure what had come over her as her lower lip began to quiver and she put nearly all her willpower into keeping her eyes from watering. Whatever little bit of strength that had held her together for the past two weeks was crumbling right in front of her, her eyes glazing over as the reality hit her square in the face.
"I can't do this by myself," she said quietly.
Ranka immediately wrapped his arms around her. "And you won't," he reassured. "I'll help you, and I know your friends will help, too."
Haruhi frowned and rested her head on his shoulder as she returned the hug. "I don't mean that, I mean…school. I have to finish high school, and…I can't do that if I have to take care of a baby. Daycare is expensive and inconvenient, and…I'm not going to let you take off work to watch the baby."
"Haruhi," said Ranka, a bit sadly. "You can always get a certificate." He paused, chuckling softly. "Besides, I didn't even go to high school, and I think I turned out pretty okay."
"You didn't have actual plans," she mumbled into his shoulder.
Ouch. It stung but she was right, and Ranka put the comment aside. "There are ways you'll still be able to follow your dreams. They might be a little more difficult, but I wouldn't write it off completely."
"But the whole reason why I even chose Ouran in the first place was because I knew that if I kept my grades up, I'd get a scholarship to the law program at the university." She let go of the hug, but allowed his hands to remain on her shoulders. "Even if I graduate from a high school, that doesn't really matter because Ouran University is out of the picture. College is expensive, and…we'll need the money to take care of the baby. I need the scholarship, Dad, and I can't get it unless I graduate from Ouran."
Ranka sighed and started rubbing his hands up and down his daughter's shoulders. "You'll figure something out regardless, I know you will. You're so smart, Haruhi."
"Am I really, though?" said Haruhi, pulling his hands off. "I got myself pregnant my first year of high school. You heard what Ms. Kosaka said when she was here the other day. Smart people don't do that."
The anger started building inside of Ranka again. That woman was definitely going on his list of people he wanted to avoid, and having to do that to someone he'd known since childhood was upsetting, even though they'd only reconnected recently. "You didn't do that to yourself," he stressed. Haruhi started to get up off the floor, and he quickly tried to find another way to diffuse the situation. "I know! I'll order a pizza for dinner; that'll make you feel better."
"It won't." Haruhi went into her bedroom and started to close the door. "I'm going to lay down."
Ranka frowned. "Well, I'm still going to order a pizza for dinner. I'll let you know when it's here."
While Haruhi had always been somewhat aloof, this was by far the worst she'd ever been, and Ranka was at a loss for words. At the beginning, he'd been a bit surprised when Haruhi decided to keep the baby, especially when doing so seemed to conflict with the goals she'd set for herself. But even after his constant reminders that it might not be as easy as she thought and that she had options, she insisted. It seemed like she knew what she was doing, so he had left it alone. But now that no longer appeared to be the case, and he didn't know what happened. (Well, he had an idea, but he knew that bringing it up would most likely only make things worse.)
He could only do so much, and that hurt him the most.
He approached the altar and knelt down in front of it. "Kotoko, our baby girl's hurting so badly right now. Please, send her all the strength she can get for the next couple of months. She needs it." Ranka looked fondly at the portrait of his wife, smiling softly. "But we're going to get through this, no matter how rough it is." Oh, how he wished Kotoko was here right now.
"It's all we can do."