The Visit

by anonymouschupacabra (accordingtomyresearch)

Summary:

Thirteen months of messaging and texting and skype calls and facetiming and finally they were actually going to meet in person.

Or: Lance and Keith became friends online and then finally meet. Things get gayer than originally planned

Notes:

so basically this a super self indulgent fic and it was supposed to be short but like i have a bunch of chapters written now and who knows

Chapter 1: Meet, Greet, and Eat

 

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“So, how exactly did you meet this dude?” Pidge asked gesturing at Lance with the half of a twizzler that wasn’t in her mouth.

“Online,” Lance said twirling the straw in his mostly empty slurpee around.

“Wow that’s not vague at all,” she frowned. “Where online? Like on Twitter? On Instagram? On Tumblr? Okcupid?”

“On Tumblr,” Lance said shaking his head at her. “We started messaging, then after a while we exchanged phone numbers and started texting.”

“And how long ago was this exactly?” Hunk asked from next to Pidge on the floor of her room.

Lance smiled at how parental his two best friends were sounding. “About a little over a year ago, dad ,” he added sarcastically. “You guys do know that I went through this entire line of questioning with my actual mom already right?”

“I know, I know,” Hunk said putting his hands up in defense. “But still, you can’t be too careful. So have you at least skyped with him? Do you have pictures of what he looks like? Do you know his full name?”

“Yes, yes, and Keith Kim,” Lance said counting off the answers on his fingers. Pidge and Hunk still did not look completely convinced. “ Guys , I didn’t invite some rando to come stay in my actual house with my actual family. I’ve been friends with this dude for over a year. We’re finally gonna meet in person. This is cool.”

“No, yeah totally it’s cool BUT have you considered the possibility that he might be—oh I don’t know— a catfishing middle aged murderous psychopath?” Pidge asked motioning around with a new twizzler.

“You sound like my mother.”

“Because it’s a thought that most people have when someone tells them that they’re meeting someone they’ve been talking to online.”

“Look,” Lance said readjusting himself on Pidge’s bed. “I had him Skype with me and meet my mom and they talked, and she sure made he was real and legit, and if he’d ever been here to New York, and if he needed anything for his stay here, so like it’s all kosher ok guys?”

“Ok well if your mom approves it then it must be ok,” Hunk said with satisfied nod.

Pidge paused. “Yeah you’re right,” she nodded as well. “If your mom is cool with this dude coming over he must be A) real, and B) nice.”

“He is both of those things.”

“Dope,” Pidge said clapping her hands together. “So, when do we get to meet him?”

“I was thinking we could all hang out on Tuesday? Is that cool for everyone?” Lance asked looking between them.

“That’s good for me,” Hunk agreed.

“Yeah, sounds good,” Pidge nodded. “So…” she looked at him knowingly. “How big of a crush do you have on this guy?”

“What!? I don't— we're just friends! I'm not— he doesn't— I never, look I don’t ok ,” Lance stuttered unconvincingly, evolving into an awkward half yell.

“Sure you don't,” Pidge smirked.

“I don't,” Lance said trying to sound more convincing. “Can't two good looking dudes be friends without it having to be gay?”

“So you think he's good looking?” Pidge grinned.

“ Objectively ,” Lance stressed. “I'm not blind, he is objectively good looking. I mean,” he pulled out his phone and pulled up their conversation and went into the details until he found a selfie that Keith had sent him a while back. “Look.” He showed his friends the picture and they both leaned in to look at the screen.

It was a slightly blurry picture, and not the most recent one that Keith had sent him, but it was Lance’s favorite. In the picture Keith was standing at the edge of a pond with the water behind him glowing iridescent shades of pinks and purples from the rising sun just tipping over the tops of the trees. His hair was pulled up in a loose ponytail and his headphones were hanging loosely on his jogging hoodie. Lance remembered waking up to that text sometime in the afternoon with a gloating text from Keith that said something about how he gets up and does healthy things while Lance sleeps his life away. Lance had sent back a picture of him comfortably tucked in bed at 1 in the afternoon.

“When's this picture from?” Hunk asked

“Like 3 months ago,” Lance said.

“How do you know he still looks like this?” Pidge said.

“Because I just told you I Skyped with him a few days ago,” Lance frowned. He pulled his phone back and dropped it on the bed next to him. “So do you guys believe me now?”

“No I don't believe you, I still think you have a crush on this guy,” Pidge said with a smirk.

“Oh my god,” Lace groaned.

“He's not ugly, you could do worse,” Hunk said sympathetically.

“ Guys .”

“Look, we're not judging you, he's cute,” Pidge said. Lance frowned at her. “Objectively.” His frown deepened. “Oh Lance just join me on the LGBT side of the world, it’s so much better here than—”

She was cut off by the sound of Lance getting several texts in a row. Quickly he picked up his phone from the bed and looked at the list of notifications on his lockscreen.

Keith: the plane just took off

Keith: no crying babies just yet

Keith: nope, I spoke too soon. Cue the crying baby [baby head emoji] [skull emoji]

Keith: it just occured to me that my phone is on airplane mode and you’re not getting any of these right now

Keith: sorry about the spam of texts you’re going to get when I land. [middle finger emoji]

Keith: I’ve landed. Terminal B. I gotta get my bag from baggage claim though.

“Oh shit he’s landed already, I gotta go,” Lance said hopping off Pidge’s bed and heading for the door. “I’ll see you guys later!” He could hear them call out goodbye as he raced down the short flight of stairs down to the first floor of Pidge’s house and out the front door.

Luckily, Pidge’s house was only a 5 minute drive to the airport and he was there in no time at all. It took him longer to navigate through the labyrinthine internal roads of the airport than actually drive to it. He pulled up in the arrivals gate in terminal B just as he felt his phone buzz with another text.

Keith: ok I /finally/ got my stuff. I’m heading over to the exit now. Seen you soon.

Those last three words made the knot in Lance’s stomach tighten even further. He was nervous, and he couldn’t even calm himself down. It was all so exciting and nerve racking at the same time.

Thirteen months of messaging and texting and skype calls and facetiming and finally they were actually going to meet face to face in person. Even thinking that was so surreal. He’d been friends with Keith online for so long, he’d basically become just a text message bubble in his mind. Yes he had a few pictures of him that Keith had sent him during their conversations, as he of course sent Keith some of himself in return. And yeah they’d Skyped a bunch of times and made dozens of facetime calls. So he knew what he looked like, and he could recognize him. But meeting in person? That’s so much different than a face on a screen.

Lance had that exact thought as the sliding doors to the airport opened and out walked a not extremely tall, slender, korean boy with messy longish hair, and a red pullover hoodie on. He was dragging a suitcase behind him in one hand, and in the other he was taking out his phone from his laptop carry on bag. Lance didn’t even need to think twice before he unbuckled, threw the door open, and hopped out of the car.

He definitely still looks like his picture

“Hey!” he called out waving his arms in the air, trying to get the boy’s attention. “Keith!”

He looked up from his phone, and glanced around nervously before his eyes found Lance. Instantly his face flooded with a mixture of relief and nerves as he stuffed his phone back into his pocket and headed over towards Lance.

Now watching his friend he’d only known through his phone actually walk towards him in real life, Lance felt a jolt of nervousness course through him as Keith got closer. “Hey!” Lance said excitedly as Keith walked over to him. “You’re here!”

“I’m here,” Keith repeated much quieter but with the same enthusiasm. He stopped just in front of Lance, his grip on his suitcase tight and his skin was flushed from nerves.

“You’re real!” Lance said putting his hands on Keith’s shoulders and giving him a small shake.

“I’m real,” Keith repeated again with a small laugh.

“Wow I’m so glad you’re finally here!” Lance said pulling Keith into a hug. One that he was clearly not expecting as he hit Lance’s chest with a thud and stayed stiff up until the last moment when Lance pulled back. “Come on, let’s get your stuff in the car.”

“Ok,” Keith nodded, pushing down the handle on his suitcase.

Lance walked him over to the trunk of his small, light blue, Ford Fiesta. Hearing honks from the other drivers behind him in the pickup lane, he quickly popped the trunk and lifted Keith’s suitcase and laptop bag inside. “I got this, you can go sit,” he said as he brought the lid down on the trunk. Keith nodded and walked around the compact car and slid into the passenger’s seat and waited for Lance to come back. Doing a light jog around the car as the honks grew louder and more impatient, Lance got into the driver's seat and turned the car back on and pulled out of the lane.

It was a few minutes of quiet driving and careful maneuvering out of the increasingly busy airport before he spoke up again. “I still can’t believe you’re actually here,” Lance said glancing at Keith in his passenger’s seat. He was sitting on his hands tucked underneath his thighs like he was afraid to touch anything. His whole body language read: nervous. “I’m really glad you are though.”

“I can’t believe I’m here either,” Keith said with a small smile. “I feel like we’ve been talking for so long but we’d never actually meet.”

“You know,” Lance continued, looking at his mirrors as he made a turn. “Even though you skyped with me a few days ago and you spoke with my mom and stuff, she’s still kind of half convinced that you’re an old dude who’s come to murder me.”

“My dads still kind of think that about you,” Keith said with a sheepish smile.

“Really?” Lance laughed.

“Yeah,” Keith nodded. “Actually,” he pulled out his right hand from underneath himself and took out his phone from his pocket, “I’m supposed to facetime them once I got here. I think they wanna make sure I’m actually alive and you’re actually you.”

“Fair enough,” Lance shrugged.

“Ok, I’m gonna call them right now,” Keith said unearthing his other hand from under himself and setting up the facetime call. Lance felt himself grow nervous as he heard the ringing noise of the call, and he forced himself to keep his eyes on the road. “Hi dad,” Keith said next to him after a few moments. “Yeah the flight was fine, only a little bit of turbulence but it didn’t bother me…only one screaming baby this time… uh it was like a weird vanilla wafer cookie thingy? I didn’t eat it. I had a coke that I had bought and a protein bar… yeah I’ll make sure to eat some real food…” Lance couldn’t help but laugh a bit at hearing his friend get parented. “Yeah he’s driving… sure— oh um Lance, my dads want to say hi,” Keith said pulling out one of his earbuds out of his ear to speak to him.

“Yeah sure,” Lance said. In his periphery he could see Keith unplug his headphones and stuff them into his hoodie pocket. Lance waited until he pulled up to a stop light to turn to Keith.

He had the phone screen facing him and on the facetime call, Lance could see two men; the one holding the phone at arm's length was a broad shouldered dark brown haired pale man with a scruffy beard, and the man next to him was a dark skinned thinner man with a shaved head and two faint facial scars going down his face. The both had an expression of excitement and nerves.

“Hello Keith's dads!” Lance said waving at the screen.

“Hello Lance,” the both said in unison.

“Thank you for inviting Keith to come stay with you,” said the dad holding the phone. “I know he was very excited and nervous to go to New York.”

“ Dad, ” Keith said exasperated closing his eyes in annoyance.

“It's ok, it's understandable,” Lance laughed. “I'm glad he came here though, I'm very excited to have him here. And I—” he was cut off by a horn honking behind him. “Oh damn,” he turned back to the road, just noticing that the light had turned green.

“Ok you saw him,” Keith said turning the phone back to him and plugging in the headphones back into the phone. Lance started driving, heading into the highway. “He's real and I'm fine… yes of course… no I know that I won't… everyday, yes I remember…” there was a longer pause and Lance glanced at Keith to see if he was still on the phone. Keith was still looking at the screen but his face was skewed up in a slight pout. Lance wasn't sure how he felt about that. Keith glanced quickly at Lance, and Lance quickly looked back at the road. The brief eye contact had made his palms grow sweaty and his heart beat faster. “Yeah he is… no… ok yeah, I'm hanging up now. Bye…” there was another brief pause and then a mumbled “yeahokIloveyoutoobye.”

He heard Keith sigh heavily and unplug his headphones from his phone and stuff them both in his hoodie pockets. Lance glanced between him and the road a few times before speaking.

“Your parents seem nice,” Lance said with a smile.

“They mean well,” Keith sighed. “Sorry about that. They can be… overprotective.”

“It's ok I know all about that,” Lance laughed. “No one over protects like a Cuban Mom. They have the market cornered.”

“She seemed nice though,” Keith said. “You know, over Skype.”

“She is, I love my mom. But like, she is the queen of overprotection.” Keith chuckled softly. “So,” he glanced at Keith, “are you hungry?”

“A little yeah,” Keith nodded.

“Great, because I’m gonna make sure you get that good good classic New York pizza like, right now,” Lance said, throwing on his turning signal and moving into the exit lane. “It’s a must have experience.”

“You do know we have pizza in Texas,” Keith said with a slight smirk, getting a bit more comfortable in the seat. “It’s not all just big steaks and mexican food.”

“Yeah but, like no,” Lance shook his head. “I’m sorry but no. I’ve had pizza outside of New York and it’s literally always a mistake.”

“I’ve had Chicago style pizza in Chicago,” Keith said. “That was good.”

“Miss me with that fake ass lasagna pizza,” Lance tisked. “No, no, you’re gonna get that true, big ass, thin crust, foldable, ooey gooey slice of true NYC pizza.”

“I’m sorry, did you say foldable?” Keith asked with a small laugh.

“Yeah,” Lance said incredulously. “You have to be able to fold the slice. That’s how you eat it. This is like, a New York law.”  

“New York already seems like a wild place,” Keith said looking out the window as Lance pulled down a fairly busy block.

“A little bit yeah.”

---

 

Lance watch with baited breath as Keith lifted the slice up to his mouth and took a bite from the end. He was holding the large slice precariously on his fingertips of his left hand with his right gingerly holding the crust. Keith bit off a piece and then put down the slice on his paper plate so he could fan his mouth.

“It’s really hot,” Keith said trying to cool down his open mouth by waving his hand in front of it.

“Well yeah, they just took it out of the oven,” Lance laughed. “But like, isn’t it amazing?”

“It tastes good, I just can’t feel my mouth anymore,” Keith said finally able to chew.

“But like, do you love it?”

“Mhm,” Keith hummed taking another bit of the slice, with a little bit more care this time.

“I’ll just take that as a “yes this is the best pizza I’ve ever had and you’re an amazing friend for opening my eyes to the truth and I will never again doubt you, my guiding light,” Lance said.

“You sure got a whole lot from just “mhm”,” Keith said, talking around his food out of the side of his mouth.

“I can read between the lines,” Lance smirked, taking a bite of his own slice.

“My question is, why is it so big?” Keith asked holding the slice up to his head. “It’s bigger than my head.”

“Aren’t you used to things being big?” Lance asked, covering his mouth with his hand while he chewed. “Isn’t everything bigger in Texas?”

“Well yeah, like hats, hair, steaks, cars, religious buildings,” Keith nodded. “But pizza? Comparatively small.”

“That’s really—” Lance was cut off by the sound of his phone vibrating on the table. He looked at the caller id and saw his mother’s face with a flower emoji bracketed “Mami” written at the top. “Oh fuck I forgot to call her,” Lance whispered, wiping his hands before picking up the phone and quickly swiping to answer. “Hello?”

“What happened to I'll call you as soon as I get him from the airport mami? ” his mom said from the other end, repeating back his words from a few hours ago.

“I'm sorry,” Lance winced, knowing that that wasn't going to be the end.

“Coño pero how was I supposed to know you weren't actually picking up a murderer if you don't even keep in contact with me?”

“You're right, I'm sorry,” Lance said watching Keith take a slow bite of his pizza.

There was a long pause and a heavy sigh from his mom. “Where are you right now?”

“At Gino’s, I brought him here to get pizza,” Lance said folding and unfolding a napkin in his hand.

“Ok well come home when you're done,” she said. “Also bring me a bag of garlic knots. I love you.”

“I love you t— she hung up,” Lance said putting his phone in his pocket.

“Ooooooh you're in trouubblllleeeeee,” Keith teased, his mouth half full of pizza.

“Shut up,” Lance laughed, kicking him lightly under the table. “I'm not in trouble. Mostly.”

“Does she still think I'm a murderer planning to kill you and collect your eyes as a trophy?” Keith asked with a smirk.

“Ok, well no more Hannibal for you,” Lance said scrunching his face in disgust. “And yeah, kinda a little bit. No offense.”

“None taken,” Keith shrugged, taking a rather large bite of his pizza. “My dads were convinced you were actually part of a cult luring people into the big city to brainwash me for evil.”

“Oh damn, well there goes Thursday’s plans,” Lance said faking disappointment. “The jig is up I suppose.”

“Actually, plot twist, I'm here to brainwash you to join my cult,” Keith joked.

“Oh how the turn tables,” Lance laughed. Keith barked out an inelegant laugh, and had to quickly cover his mouth before he spit pizza out all over Lance. He slapped his left hand over his mouth and held in his laugh, while the other reached around blindly for a napkin. “Here you go, you dork,” Lance said handing him a napkin.

“Thanks,” Keith said a bit strained, his laughter having now morphed into coughing.

Lance's eyes swept across Keith's face, taking in his flushed cheeks, his laugh/cough tearing eyes, his hair that fell just slightly too long in his face. He was wiping his mouth and hand with a napkin, reaching for more to clean up the piece that fell out of his mouth when he first laughed. It wasn't like he was doing anything spectacular. This was just Lance’s friend, the person he'd spent the past year talking almost everyday to, who knew him and his humor almost too well, who just flew a couple hundred miles to visit him.

Oh shit he's cute

Lance dismissed the thought as soon as he had it. It was ridiculous. It wasn't like this was the first time he'd thought that. He wasn't blind. He knew Keith was good looking. Objectively. If you liked that sort of thing. If your sort of thing was a boy who giggled and didn't use emojis properly and sent you jogging selfies. Which, that wasn't Lance’s thing. No, not at all.

“You good?” Lance asked trying to think about anything else.

“Yeah, I think so,” Keith nodded, still sounding like he was on the verge of coughing.

“Ok finish up, I’m gonna go order some garlic knots to bring to my mom,” Lance said getting up from the table.

He was sort of relieved to have a reason to step away from Keith for a moment. Lance had been seesawing between nervous and excited for the past few weeks that now that Keith was actually there in front of him, he was having both emotions at the same time. Also it didn’t help that he could hear Pidge and Hunk’s words rattling around in his head, banging against an image of Keith’s face all flushed and smiling and—

“Hello? Your order is ready,” the big italian guy behind the counter said, waving a hand in front of Lance’s face to try to get his attention. He shook the bag of garlic knots in Lance’s face as his eyes came back into focus.

“Oh, thank you,” Lance said shaking his head and taking the bag. He walked back over to the table where Keith, who had finished eating, was playing on his phone. “Ready?”

“Mhm,” Keith said getting up, and collecting their trash onto one tray and walking it over to the garbage.

“Ok let’s go.” Lance motioned for Keith to follow him out, holding the bag tightly in his hand. He didn’t want to get in his own head so he forced himself to interact. “So it was good right?”

“Yeah it actually was,” Keith agreed, as they walked towards Lance’s car.

“This is one of my favorite places,” Lance said. “Me and my friends would come here alot when we were in high school. Like a lot a lot .”

“Like, a lot?” Keith repeated jokingly.

“Like, all the cooks knew us all by name at one point,” Lance said with a sheepish, but nostalgic smile. He walked up to the car and unlocked it and they both slid inside. “We spent so much of our money here on pizza and garlic knots. Actually once in senior year, we had to keep a fiscal diary and count how and where we spend our money for a few months. And let me just say, holy shit I spent a lot on pizza.”

“How much?” Keith said, sounding genuinely interested.

“It was in the hundreds I’ll say that,” Lance said turning on the car. “It was far more than any human person should have ever spent on pizza in a span of 3 months. I think even my teacher was concerned.”

“You bought an alarming amount of pizza,” Keith laughed. “How does one even manage that?”

“Well the trick is,” Lance began, making his voice sound proper and haughty, “to just never buy anything but pizza, and buy pizza everyday. And every so often? Buy it twice a day.”

“Twice a day!?” Keith asked incredulously. “Why!?”

“Hey I fully blame Pidge,” Lance said in his own defense. He began to pull out of the parking spot and drive down the street. “She likes pizza for breakfast and for dinner. A lot of times on the same day. She calls it a “snitch meal”.”

“Why?” Keith laughed.

“Because you “open at the close”,” Lance said. “Get it? Pizza at the beginning and pizza at the end. Like in Harry Potter.” He glanced over at Keith who looked thoroughly amused.

“I can’t tell if that’s crazy or genius.”

“I’d say crazy genius.”.

“Your friends sound cool,” Keith said with a brief nod.

“Yeah they are,” Lance smiled. “You'll meet them this week. They're gonna go with us to the Bronx Zoo on Tuesday.”

“Oh is this the zoo you were saying was the—”

“Best zoo in the world, yup,” Lance finished for him as he pulled into his block. “Ok we're almost here.” He maneuvered down the narrow two-way street until he reached his house at the end of the block. “Home sweet home,” he said pulling into the driveway.

“This is your house?” Keith asked looking out the windshield.

“Yeah…” Lance said suddenly insecure by the way Keith asked that. He glanced up at the house. It wasn't anything huge or spectacular, but it was home. It was a stand alone, brick house with sloping roofs and large bright windows. Sure there were bigger, nicer houses, but he liked it. But having Keith question it flipped his world on its ear.

Keith looked over at Lance and saw the insecurity on his face. “No no I didn't mean it like— I'm just surprised. It's so huge and nice, and we're in New York City. I was expecting an apartment. Like a small apartment.”

“Oh,” Lance felt all the tension leave his body. “No, I live in a house. With a backyard that has swingset and a deck and stuff. And my dad mows the law. It's all very suburban.”

“New York just keeps getting weirder and weirder,” Keith mumbled to himself as he unbuckled and got out of the car.

“Did you think it's just apartments as far as the eye can see?” Lance asked with a small amused smile, grabbing the food bag and getting out of the car and walking around to the trunk. Keith just sort of shrugged yes. “We're more than just Manhattan you know. For example, this is Queens.” He gestured around in the air all around him as he popped the trunk open.

“Queens looks like suburbia.”

“Eh,” Lance shrugged pulling out the suitcase and dropping it on the driveway next to him. “Kinda.” He handed Keith his laptop case. “Come on,” he closed the trunk with one hand and grabbed the handle to the suitcase with the other.

They walked over to the front door, lifting the suitcase up the few steps to the landing. Lance swung around his keys on his fingers, trying to find his house key, but just as he was closing in on it, the door swung open. In the doorway stood his mom, a full head shorter than him but with the same face. Lance often thought about how much he looked like a darker, taller version of his mom. His brother used to joke about how their parents just made a copy their mom and put her in the taffy puller to make Lance.

“Oh, thanks mom,” Lance said stepping back to open the storm door. “I almost had my keys ready, though.”

“It's ok, I heard you parking,” his mom said. She tilted her head and looked over Lance’s shoulder at Keith behind him. “You must be Keith, it’s nice to meet you.”

“Yes, t–thank you for letting me come stay,” Keith nodded nervously. Lance glanced back at him; his face flushed a light pink and his stuff posture spelled anxious.

“Oh it's no problem at all,” she continued. “We're just glad to have you here. Leandro has been excited for weeks. And he—”

“Mom,” Lance interrupted before she could say anything embarrassing. “How about we go inside now?”

“Ok, ok,” she said taking a step aside to let them both in. Lance took a step in, walking into the house, and immediately regretted it as his mom descended on Keith. “So how was your flight? Was there any turbulence? You flew into LaGuardia right? That’s the much better airport than JFK, that place is a nightmare. A few years ago my husband and I were going on a vacation for our second honeymoon, and we were flying out of JFK and I swore to him I’d never step foot in that airport again, it was such a nightmare.”

“Mom.”

“Keith do you have any food allergies or preferences?” she continued walking Keith further into the house past Lance leading him through the entrance into the living room. “Is there anything you don’t like? I want to tell my husband so that he doesn’t cook that this week.”

“ Mom .”

“Oh and I’ve already set up the air mattress in Leandro’s room for you, but if you need any extra pillows or blankets be sure to let me know.”

“ Mom! ,” Lance said loud enough to get her attention.

“Yes?” she asked looking at him with a face that dared him to yell again.

“He just got here,” Lance said gesturing to Keith who had been patiently listening to his mom talk him, but who still looked clearly awkward. “Give him a moment to breathe.”

“Ok,” she said putting her hands up defensively. “I get it. Go put his bags up in your room and then— well, I guess you both already ate right? Then nevermind, just let me know if you need anything.”

“Thank mom,” Lance said pressing a kiss to her cheek. “I love you. Here are your garlic knots.”

“Yeah yeah,” she said, smiling through her frown taking the bag from his hand.

“Come on,” Lance motioned to Keith to follow him. He grabbed Keith’s suitcase with both hands and walked through the living room to the stairs and took them up two at a time, hearing Keith run up behind him. “Here, it’s that door at the end of the hallway.”

“This one? With the big parental advisory sticker on the outside?” Keith asked walking up to the last door on the left.

“Yeah… I thought I was being edgy and cool in like, 8th grade,” Lance shrugged putting the suitcase down to open the door. “Did you know shopping at Hot Topic, not that edgy.”

“No way,” Keith said dryly, a smirk playing at the sides of his mouth. “I don’t know why I’m pretending to judge you when I spent about 80% of my preteen and early teen years in Hot Topic and Spencers,” he said following Lance into his bedroom.

“What happened to the other 20%?” Lance asked dropping Keith’s suitcase next to his dresser against the wall.

“Well I had to go to school sometimes,” Keith shrugged. He looked around Lance’s bedroom.

It had been supernaturally cleaned over the past week to be, in Lance’s mother’s words, “habitable for humans”. Lance was actually curious to what Keith thought of it. This had been his room since he was about 13, and instead of changing with his interests as he grew older, if sort of just gained layers over the years.

The matte, navy wall paint held random patches of discolored wall where it’d held posters of different sizes for different periods of time judging by the level of discoloration. Currently he’d been in a sort of minimalism kick, so all the posters he’d had, had been paired down to a handful of Marvel posters that lined the one wall he’d limited himself to. His bed was pushed into the corner of the far wall next to the closet and his desk and bookshelves were the only remnants of his collection of fandom things, all the shelves storing books, and boxes, and figurines that he’d been collecting over the years. The air mattress that his mother placed in the room was leaning against the side wall under the window, blocking his keyboard that he kept against the wall.

“So?” Lance said dropping himself on his bed with a slight bounce. “What do you think?”

“It’s very… you,” Keith said.

“In a good way or…?”

“Yeah,” Keith nodded. “Although, I was expecting more mermaid stuff.”
“Oh my god,” Lance groaned, covering his face with his hands and throwing himself back on his bed. “It was a phase. I was little. Please let it go.”

“Where are the Little Mermaid bed sheets though?” Keith smirked putting down his laptop bag and walking over to inspect Lance’s white and blue sheets. “I feel robbed.”

“I hate you so much,” Lance mumbled through his hands covering his face. “I’m never telling you about any of my interests ever again.”
“Yeah, I follow your porn blog, I’ve seen your worst,” Keith grinned, dropping down to sit on the bed next to Lance, bouncing him slightly. “Which means I know for a fact that your mermaid thing goes way beyond Little Mermaid bed sheets.”

“That’s it, you’re blocked. I’m blocking you.”

“You can’t block the truth.”

“I hate you so much,” Lance mumbled, spreading apart his fingers and glaring at Keith through them.

“Says the guy who invited me to stay with him for a week,” Keith smirked. He looked down at Lance with knowing expression that was both goading him and victorious. Combined with the fact that he was leaning back on his hands and his hair was falling in his face in a way that Lance had to describe as “pretty” even though he was frantically searching his brain for another word, he had a thought that he knew everything was going to go downhill from there.

Maybe not so objectively

Chapter 2: If It Doesn't Bring The Boy To The Yard, Is It Really A Milkshake?

Notes:

ahhhhh i'm so shocked by the response to this fic, i literally thought no one was gonna like this. i actually have it titled "my stupid dumb projecting AU" in my google docs lmao. but thank you!!!!!!!!

i'm gonna try to keep a semi regular update schedule which will be every saturday and wednesday, but who knows lmao

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Lance wasn’t sure why he hadn’t been more nervous about introducing Keith to his family. He chalked it up to hubris.

It had been a painful stream of “ haha we thought at first that you were gonna be a murderer” and “ you came all the way here to see him?” and Lance’s personal favorite “ we kind of thought Leandro made you up! ” It was just a fun time all around. Definitely no regrets there.

He definitely didn't regret introducing Keith to his dad and then subjecting Keith to a million questions on Texan airports. It wasn’t like Lance totally didn't want his brother Luis discussing every detail of Lance’s failed years in Little League with Keith. And he most definitely had not planned for his mom and sister Lola to talk at Keith about all of the dozens of places he just had to see in the city.

Which is to say, he totally regretted all of that.

It was a very long dinner and dessert that Lance sat through, watching Keith very patiently and attentively listen to everything that his family had to say. Though, to be fair, not talking did give Lance the opportunity to think over a few things he hadn't anticipated before Keith arrived.

The first being, Keith was a lot more shy than he'd originally thought. It never occurred to him that the person behind the blog that Lance had sent message about how the DC universe was objectively better than the Marvel universe, who had then responded with 3 essay length paragraphs describing why he was a fucking idiot, could actually be moderately shy in person. Keith was actually a lip biting, nail picking, leg jiggling type of shy and nervous. And no matter how many times Lance tried to save him from a conversation with his well meaning but ultimately intimidating family, Keith still remained that way.

The second was that Lance was not prepared for how protective of Keith he felt. When the conversation at dinner turned to Keith and his life and his family, Lance was on the edge of his seat ready to stop any of his family members that said or asked Keith anything that was going to upset him. Lance was well aware of all the turmoil Keith had gone through in his life, from being orphaned, to going from foster home to foster home, before finally being adopted by his now dads. He also knew that, if he wasn’t in the right mood, it could be painful to talk about for Keith. Luckily enough, though Lance was ready to end the conversation as soon as he noticed Keith become uncomfortable, he listened as Keith calmly explained being adopted and living on the ranch with his two dads, and how Thace and Ulaz were worried that he was going to the city and that also were worried that Lance might be a murderer.

The last thing Lance hadn’t anticipated was how Keith was going to act around him. Over the past year they’d developed a sort of friendly mutual–bullying–based friendship that revolved around making jokes and teasing each other. But now, though they still made light teasing remarks at each other’s expensive, Keith was really quiet and nice. There was something so soft about his in–person personality that Lance just wasn’t prepared for. Of course Keith was still sharp barbs and cutting snarky remarks, but he was also timid questions about where he should sit and quiet listening as Lance talked.

And now that it got late enough that Lance’s parents went to bed and his sister left to go out with her friends and his brother went back to his apartment, he found himself alone with Keith. Something he didn’t realize he was nervous about until he heard the sound of his parents bedroom door closing and he looked at Keith sitting across from him on the couch and thought: well shit.

“Your parents are nice,” Keith said folding his legs underneath him. “And your siblings too.”

“Thanks,” Lance smiled. “I’m sorry they talk so much too. And so loudly. But to be perfectly honest, it’s a Cuban thing.”

“It’s ok, it’s nice,” Keith said. “Your family is all very similar. You all look like your mom. And you have a family voice.”

Lance’s smile faded a bit, knowing exactly why that would be something Keith would focus on. “Yeah,” his eyes swept over Keith’s face wishing that there wasn’t such a tinge of sadness to his comments. “Hey,” he sat up on the couch, “I know it’s a little late, but do you wanna go on a walk? There’s this ice cream place a few blocks from here, and it’s one of those old style ones, you know with like the candy counter and the old fashion booths.”

“Yeah sure,” Keith agreed.

“Ok let me get my wallet,” Lance said getting up from the couch. Making sure not to make too much noise, he went into his room and grabbed his wallet and quickly changed his shirt into a long sleeve blue baseball shirt and then went back down stairs. When he came down stairs Keith was already getting his sneakers on. “Alright, ready to go?”

“Yeah,” Keith said getting up from the couch.

“Cool cool, let’s go.” he walked towards the door, grabbed his jacket and held the door out for Keith, pulling it closed behind them.

The chill from the early summer night air made Lance glad he slipped on his jacket before they left. Feeling Keith’s arm brush his as they walked, he stuffed his hands into his pocket, fingering his phone and his keys. He glanced over at Keith who was looking around at the houses and buildings as they walked.

“Are you cold?” Lance asked noticing that Keith was still only in his hoodie.

“No I’m ok, I run hot,” Keith said shaking his head. He chuckled softly, “my dad says that my fiery temper comes from a literal fire inside me, like a pilot light.”

“Maybe you’re part dragon,” Lance joked.

“That’d be pretty cool actually,” Keith said. “If I could breathe fire there’s a couple of old teachers I’d like go and visit.”

“I like that your immediate response to having a magical power is to enact vengeance,” Lance laughed. “ I have the ability to breath fire now— Oh Mrs. Gilston, I’ve been meaning to talk to you. ”

“Well wouldn’t you?” Keith smirked. “I mean, if you had that sort of magical whatever, you wouldn’t use it to go back to some dickhole you knew and give them a piece of your mind?”

“Oh dude, please you know I would,” Lance waved dismissively at him. “I just like that that’s your go–to as well. Friendship level: vengeance.”

“Everyone has people that they have an unending life–long vengeance quest for,” Keith said. “For me it’s Mr. Jackson my 3rd grade teacher, and Mrs. Kennelly my high school guidance counselor.”

“Well my Inigo Montoya–eque vengeance quest is against Mrs. Popatopolis my 3rd grade teacher,” Lance said. “She made would send me to the principal almost everyday for literally no reason other than she just hated me, the racist bitch. And once I got a papercut on my hand and she refused to let me go to the nurse or give me a bandaid. When I told my mom that she went in and yelled at her for an hour. It was awesome.”

“Well now I’m adding her to my list of people I’ll go visit when I discover my fire breathing powers,” Keith said.

“Thanks,” Lance laughed. “What’d your guidance counselor do?”

“She was homophobic. I have two gay dads. I cursed her out, and I got suspended for it,” Keith said with a shrug. “Totally worth it.”

“I’ll add her to my list of people I’m going to Inigo Montoya,” Lance said seriously. “What did your dads say?”

“Well one of my dad’s told me that I shouldn’t do that because people like that aren’t going to change and it isn’t worth getting in trouble over something so dumb and to not let my temper get the better of me and to make sure to think about all the consequences before I take an action. My other dad bought me an Xbox.”

Lance burst out laughing. “Let me guess, Thace bought you the Xbox?” Keith nodded. “I knew it. Honestly? Mood.”

“Yeah, so I still say it was worth it.”

“I’d say so,” Lance agreed as they turned to corner onto the main street, right in front of the ice cream store on the corner. “Ok we’re here.”

“Oh that was fast,” Keith said following behind Lance a he opened the door for them.

“Yeah, it’s pretty close,” Lance said holding the door open for him. “Pidge, Hunk, and I come here all the time in the summer. Their ice cream is so good and the milkshakes are to die for.”

They both walked in and were immediately standing at the end of the line. The store was exactly as Lance had described it, an old style ice cream shop complete with a metal counter and old timey signs and toys on display. Even all the employees wore little paper hats and white and red striped shirts. But it was almost impossible to take it all in because they couldn’t see past the line of people waiting to order.

“Wow there is a lot more people here than I thought there would be for,” Keith looked down at his phone screen, “11pm on a Sunday.”

“Yeah this place does a lot of business during the summer,” Lance said craning his neck around the line to see how many people were in front of him. “But it moves fast.”

The wait on the line wasn’t so bad, and it did move fairly quickly. But by the time it was their turn to order, every seat and booth and table were full.

“Hi, can I have a milkshake with vanilla ice cream and coffee syrup, and a mint chip milkshake with chocolate syrup, and both of them are to go,” Lance said pulling out his wallet and handing the cashier his card. He heard Keith make a sound to offer to pay for his own milkshake, but Lance pushed his hand away and took back his card. “Come on, let’s wait over here,” he said walking them over to the end of the other side of the counter.

“I can pay for my own food you know,” Keith frowned, coming to stand next to him.

“It’s ok, I got it,” Lance said with a shrug. “You paid to come here, the least I can do is buy you some food.” Keith frowned deepened, but he didn’t say anything.

Lance leaned against the wall by the counter, sticking his hands in his pockets. Keith was standing close next to him, trying not to be in anyone else’s way, with his arms crossed over his chest as he looked around. Lance glanced around the room, seeing if there were any seats that opened up for them. But instead of seeing empty seats, he noticed that almost everyone in the store was there on a date.

It was like Lance had missed a sign outside that read “Bring Your Date and Get Your Second Milkshake Free!” Each table and booth held every variation of couple possible, all giggling and laughing and holding hands across the table and playing footsie under the tables. It was like Valentine’s day in the middle of June.

Lance looked over at Keith to see if he noticed. But he still had the same blank expression, still folding his arms across his chest, stepping aside every so often when someone needed to move by him. The internal crisis that Lance was having about bringing his friend accidently into dateville was lessened slightly by Keith clearly not realizing they were the only non-romantic duo in the whole store.

Actually come to think of it, Lance wasn’t sure if Keith had ever actually been on a date before, and if he had, he couldn’t remember Keith mentioning it. Lance had told him about all his dating failures, about his girlfriend he had for all of 3 days in the 10th grade, his ex girlfriend from his freshman year of college that ended in chaos with his phone being submerged in a fountain in central park, and the one date he’d had in the past year that he’d immediately came back and texted Keith about how ice skating and hot dogs don’t mix. But he couldn’t remember Keith ever talking about any of his dating past.

Of course it was possible he just didn’t have a dating past, nothing wrong with that. But in that moment Lance couldn’t even remember if Keith had ever told him about old crushes or even celebrities he found hot. Lance stared at Keith in this ice cream shop, after over a year of friendship and at least a $250 plane ticket, and he realized there was a huge chunk about Keith he did not know.

“Vanilla and mint chip milkshake,” the guy behind the counter said reading off the receipt stapled to the back of the bag.

“That’s mine,” Lance said reaching over and taking the bag from his hands. “Thank you.” He turned around and tilted his head motioning for Keith to follow him out of the store. “Here you go, this is yours,” Lance said once they were outside, opening the bag and handing him the greenish drink container.

“Thank you,” Keith said ripping the the paper off the straw and sticking it into the lid. He took a long sip. “Oh wow, that actually is really good.”

“I told you,” Lance said tossing out the bag and sipping his own milkshake. “Come on, let’s walk.”

They walked in a companionable silence for a little while, both enjoying their milkshake and listening to the sounds of neighborhood. But the niggling thought that Lance was ignorant of a big part of Keith’s life was bothering him. He tried to think of something else to talk about, but the words came out before he thought about them.

“So have you ever been on a date before?”

Keith choked in surprise on his milkshake, coughing slightly as he tried not to spit out green ice cream all over himself. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand before answering, “um, no. Why?”
“Oh nothing, I was just wondering,” Lance said stirring his drink with the straw. “There were a ton of people on dates in the ice cream shop and I was thinking about the last date I went on and then I realized you’ve never talked about your dating history before.”

“That’s because I don’t have one,” Keith shrugged.

“Really?”

“Yeah, why? Does that surprise you?” Keith asked.

“Well sorta,” Lance nodded. “You’re a good looking dude, and you’re really cool and stuff, there’s no reason to think you haven’t been on at least one date before.”

Keith looked at him for a moment with an expression that Lance couldn’t read. “I mean, I did go on one date before. Sort of.”

“Oh?” Lance said interested. “Do tell.”

“Well, it was one of those things where my friend want to make her ex boyfriend jealous so she asked me to go on a date with her,” Keith said. “So it was a date, but not really.”

“Did it work?”

“No.”

“Why not?” Lance said in surprise.

Keith paused, taking a long sip from his milkshake. “Let’s just say, she’s not my type. So her ex didn’t get so much as jealous, as he did just threaten to beat me up.”

“Sounds like a shitty guy and not worth your friend getting back with to me,” Lance said seriously.

“That’s what I told her,” Keith shrugged. “They didn’t get back together, but she is now dating an even worse guy she met in college. So there’s that.”

“Your friend sounds great,” Lance said sarcastically.

“We’re not really friends anymore,” Keith said quietly. Lance watched him drink, avoiding eye contact with him by staring at his feet as they walked. He felt bad for bringing up the topic, but he had no idea it was so touchy for him.

“Well, anyone would be lucky to go on a date with you,” Lance said trying to lighten the mood. “You’re a catch.”

“Thanks,” Keith said with a half smile. “I’ll be sure to tell whomever actually eventually dates me that you said that.”

“You definitely should do that,” Lance nodded. “Now what do you say to us going back to my house and playing Mario Kart until we can’t keep our eyes open anymore?”

“Sounds amazing.”

---

 

Playing video games until they couldn’t keep their eyes open anymore led to them both literally falling asleep one lap into a race somewhere around two in the morning.

Lance awoke to the losing music on the screen. His head was tossed back on the couch and the controller was sitting precariously on the edge of the couch. As he rubbed the sleep from his face he quickly shut off the console and the TV. Just as he moved to get up to put his remote away, he looked over at the other end of the couch where Keith was.

Curled up with his head laying on the armrest, Keith was fast asleep. The sort of natural pout his face made when he was awake flattened out into a soft sleeping expression that made himself look so… delicate. Just thinking that made Lance flush with embarrassment. Keith was a 20 year old dude, not a flower.

But there Keith was, completely asleep and looking, for lack of a better word, delicate. His hair had fallen in front of his face, creating a curtain of dark brown that parted in front of his closed eyes. His hands were tucked underneath his head, and his legs were pulled up to his chest.

Lance took a step towards him to go wake him up so they could get up to his bedroom. But as soon as he got a bit closer, Keith shifted in place and let out a small tired sigh.

“Oh for fucks sake,” Lance whispered angrily. Keith made another quiet sigh and Lance just about lost his mind. “This is ridiculous— Keith , Keith wake up. ” He reached over and lightly shook Keith's shoulder. “Keith wake up you fell asleep.”

“Huh?” Keith said sleepily opening his eyes. “Did I fall asleep?”

“Yeah,” Lance said quietly, bending down to Keith's eye level. “Come on let's go upstairs.”

“Ok,” Keith said rubbing his face with the palm of his hand. He unfurled himself from the couch and stood up next to Lance, covering his mouth over a big yawn.

They shut off all the lights and quietly walked up the stairs, going all the way down the hallway and into Lance's bedroom. His mom had placed a stack of blankets and a pillow in top of Lance's bed for Keith. He carefully over turned the air mattress that was still propped up against his wall, and laid it on the floor for Keith and set up the blankets on top.

“Here you go,” Lance said. “I'm gonna use  the bathroom and then you can.

“Ok thank you,” Keith nodded.

Lance walked out of the room and tiptoed down the hallway again, to the shared bathroom in the middle. He quietly went through his nightly routine, skipping some of the more longer steps. Once he was done, he went back down the hall into his room.

“The bathroom’s all yours now Keith,” he whispered opening the door. But he looked down at the air mattress and he saw that Keith was fast asleep.

He was sleeping on top of the blankets, seeming to have fallen asleep while waiting for Lance to come back. He had managed to change out of his clothes, now just in a loose tshirt and briefs. His hands were tucked under his head in the pillow, with his legs pulled up to his chest again the same way he was on the couch.

I guess that's just how he sleeps. He sleeps in the fetal position. It's kind of adorable.

With a slightly frustrated sigh, Lance took off his clothes and pulled on a pair of sleep pants and went to bed.

Chapter 3: Like I'm Not Saying, I'm Gay... But Like, Hypothetically Speaking,

Notes:

this fic has a wild amount of kudos for so few chapters and I love each and every one of you all

Keith eyed the green iron entrance that led down below the street. “The subway?” he said with trepidation.

“Yeah,” Lance nodded, twirling his metro card in his hand. Keith made a face. “What? You didn't think we'd be going on the subway? It's New York, how do you think we get around?”

“Well you picked me up in a car yesterday,” Keith frowned.

“Ok, yeah, in Queens . But you couldn't pay me to drive into Manhattan,” Lance said. He started down the steps. “Come on, we're gonna miss the train.”

Reluctantly Keith followed him down, staying as close as possible to him once inside the station. Despite being about 10 in the morning on a Monday, the station was still bustling with people going either into Manhattan or further out into Queens. Lance pulled Keith by the hem of his shirt over to the turnstiles.

“Ok I’m gonna swipe you in,” Lance said standing aside. He ran his card through the slot and motioned for Keith to go through. Awkwardly, Keith pushed through the turnstile almost tripping over to the other side. Lance then expertly swiped and walked through with no problem.

“Show off,” Keith said over his shoulder.

“I know,” Lance grinned. “Come on this way.” He gestured for Keith follow him down the right set of stairs to the platform below. As they reached the stairs they heard the train pull into the station and Lance began rushing down to get to the train. “Come on!” Lance called out behind him, jumping through the open doors. He stopped in the doorway and held his arm in front of the door as Keith ran in to join him in the crowded train.

“Is it always this dramatic?” Keith asked as the doors closed behind him. His back was against the door and his front was pressed up against Lance's chest. The crowd in the train was pushing Lance more into Keith as the train lurched forward.

“Um,” he swallowed nervously, trying to find something to hold onto that wasn't the door behind Keith's head. “Yeah sometimes. It's summer so there's a lot of people touristing about.” He settled for grabbing onto an overhead pole, and looked down at Keith below him. His face was far closer than he was ready for it to be. “So the trains tend to be… crowded.”

The train came to a halt in the next station with an inelegant sudden brake, making Keith stumble a bit. He lifted a hand to hold himself steady and placed it on Lance's shoulder. The touch immediately felt hot through Lance’s white and gray striped tshirt.

This was the second time this morning that Lance had come face to face (no pun intended) with the fact that he was quickly reevaluating his previous stance on his emotions towards Keith. Had someone asked him only about a week ago what he thought of Keith, he would have told them that they were really good friends and he was very excited to met him in person. Now however, things were starting to feel… confusing.

First of all, earlier this morning when he'd awoken facing Keith, he got an eye full of “Early Morning Keith”. Which apparently was a combination of waking up to him changing into a pair of black yoga pants with his hair tied up in a ponytail, listening to him talk quietly to Lance with his raspy freshly–awake voice, and then sitting on his bed while Keith moved the air mattress, rolled out a yoga mat, a proceeded to do yoga for 20 minutes. By the time he'd reached downward dog pose, Lance was redder than a tomato and very, very conflicted.

On one hand, he wasn't gay. But on the other, he had no idea if that was even true. Keith was his friend who he talked to everyday and opened up to about his life and shared his dreams and goals with, and he felt really close with him. And Lance was someone that Keith trusted, and he knew how important that was for Keith. He was someone who hadn't had many people he could trust in his life.

And this… this thing that Lance was feeling, it felt like he was breaking Keith's trust somehow. That if—hypothetically— he did have some sort of non–platonic type feelings for Keith, and he told him about them, it was like he made Keith come all the way to New York to be harassed. And that felt really shitty to think about.

But the more he tried to ignore it, the stronger it felt. Even in now, pressed up against Keith in the subway car, trying to pretend that Keith was just another friend that he was squashed up against on the subway as usual. Yet he was finding it hard to keep his heartbeating at a normal velocity, very much unlike he would be if pressed up in a crowded subway car against Hunk or Pidge. Every touch, every sound, everything from Keith felt amplified a thousand times. Including the guilty, sinking feeling that he was alone in this newly found emotional turmoil.

“How many more stops?” Keith asked as the train began to clear out. Lance took the opportunity to move away from being pressed up against him, to leaning against the door next to him.

“Only two,” Lance said pointing to the illuminated list of stations above them. “They're quick.”

“Ok,” Keith nodded, looking across to the other set of doors which had just closed on a woman. “Do you take the train a lot?”

“ A lot a lot,” Lance said. “I've been taking the train my whole life, and I started taking it by myself to get to school since I was 14.”

“14? Damn,” Keith said surprised.

“I mean, I would take it with my siblings too,” Lance said. “And they're a lot older than me. So I wasn't like, alone until I was 16.”

“Still,” Keith said.

“That's just how life is here in the Big Apple,” Lance shrugged.

“My dads didn't even want to let me learn to drive a car until I turned 16, and even when I got it, they didn’t want me driving around,” Keith said holding onto the pole next to him as the train came to another inelegant stop. “I mean, I built my own motorcycle and got around that limitation, but still.”

“Wait you built it !?” Lance said shocked. “I didn't know you built it!”

“Yeah, didn't I tell you?” Keith said genuinely surprised.

“No! I thought you just like fixed it up, I didn't know you built it,” Lance said. “That's really impressive, and awesome, and cool and—” hot , he thought, cutting himself off. His mouth shut tight to prevent himself from saying it out loud.

“My dad didn't think so at first,” Keith shrugged. “He said I was making a screaming metal death trap. My other dad bought me parts.”

Lance's mind supplied him with the image of Keith building the bike. Only his mind created it using the memory of Keith wearing yoga pants, and bent him over a motorcycle, holding a giant wrench, all sweaty and covered in grease—

“One more stop to go,” Lance said thickly, changing the subject. As non sequiturs go, that was about as random as they could be.

“Where are we even going again?” Keith ask, not noticing Lance’s weirdness.

“We're gonna walk the High Line,” Lance said watching the train pull into their stop. “It's this city park that's a repurposed above ground subway line. Plus there's lot of food and touristy things for you to see there, You can even see the Statue of Liberty at one point.”

“Ok,” Keith nodded. Lance glanced at him, expecting him to object. “What?”

“Nothing I'm just waiting for the inevitable “oh but that's boring” complaint I get from people when I suggest doing this,” Lance said as the train came to a stop.

Keith gave him a brief confused look. “I like walking,” Keith said. “And I like parks. I like the outdoors.”

Lance blinked a few times, somewhat surprised at how agreeable he was to whatever Lance had planned for him. “Ok, good.” The doors opened in front of them. “Come on,” he took a step out and glanced behind him to make sure Keith was following him. When he saw that he was, Lance continued down the platform and towards the steps leading out.

He looked behind him a few times to make sure Keith was keeping up, and each time he saw that Keith was only a few steps behind him. Lance took the steps two at a time, trying to get in front of the crowd of people exiting, and waited for Keith at the street level. A few seconds later he saw Keith and pulled him by the sleeve of his red henley.

“Come on, this ain't Home Alone 2: Lost In New York. I don't want to have to explain to your dads why I lost their son,” Lance said.

“It's not like I'm trying to get separated from you,” Keith frowned. “There's a lot of people here.”

“Welcome to New York,” Lance joked. “Come on, let's go this way. I wanna start from the very beginning.”

They started walking them down the block, moving them through the groups of people touristing about, weaving through disgruntled businessmen, and shuffling around nannies taking their charges out for a stroll. Lance noticed that this time Keith matched his pace and was able to keep up with him, falling into speed with him as they rounded the corner.

“There it is,” Lance said excitedly, pointing to the raised structure. It looked like exactly what Lance had implied: it was a park, complete with trees and grass and flowers and benches and pathways, that all sat on top of a refurbished above ground subway track. He walked them over to the metal stairs leading up to the park. They came up on the landing that opened up to a walkway that was lined with trees, overlooking the roads below. The railing on the end was a translucent glass that let them see down to watch the cars below. Flowers and small plants seemed to be growing out of cracks in the rails and pathways leading all the way down the trail as far as the eye could see.

“Oh woah,” Keith said, looking around. “That's… I'm not sure what I was expecting, but it wasn’t this.”

Lance grinned. “It’s really cool right?” Keith nodded, his eyes moving across the whole scene, taking it all in.

“How long is it?” Keith asked, walking over to the very end to look over the side of the railing.

“It’s a couple dozen blocks long. It ends at the Javits. But it gets even more gorgeous than this,” Lance said leaning on the railing next to Keith. He was leaning over, his hair falling slightly in his face as he watched the cars pass in front of them. The late morning sun filtered through the trees and landed in lace–like shadows across Keith’s face and body. His teeth absentmindedly bit at the hint of a smile forming on his face.

“I wanna walk the whole thing,” Keith said turning his attention to Lance. The weight of his gaze gave Lance a warm churning feeling in the pit of his stomach.

“Yeah we will,” Lance agreed, his voice thick in his throat. In that moment he almost felt like he would have agreed to anything Keith said.

---

Walking with Keith through the entirety of the highline was wonderful, except for the fact that Lance was in agonizing internal conflict the entire time.

The part of him that was enjoying himself, and having a genuinely good time with his friend in one of his favorite places in the city, was constantly being overwhelmed by the other part of him that was screaming “YOU LIKE HIM! YOU LIKE HIM! YOU LIKE HIM!” over and over in the back of his mind.

Sometimes it was easy to tune out, like when they would fall into a deep and long conversation as they walked, feeling similar to the way they spoke when they were only texting each other from miles away. But other times, it was less easy, like when they stopped for gelato from a park vendor and sat on a small bench under the shade of a flowering tree, and Keith was sitting so close to him and Lance kept forcing his eyes away from watching him lick his spoon. That was harder to ignore from the incessant chanting of his inner thoughts.

What made it worse was that not only was Keith oblivious, he most definitely was not having the same internal conflict that Lance was. He thought if maybe he could get a hint from Keith, that this sort of attraction was mutual, it might make him feel better about having these thoughts about his friend. And maybe they could talk about it, or work through it, or even act on it if they so chose…

No, Lance didn’t want to go down that line of thought, it was only going to lead to disappointment. He had to remember that Keith only saw him as a friend, and being a good friend to him was more important than any silly, probably not real, feelings he was having. It was better to ignore them anyway. Even though seeing Keith smile made his heart beat faster. And he wanted to hear everything Keith had to say. And standing close to him made him feel hot and cold at the exact same time.

He could ignore all that if he tried hard enough. Theoretically.

“Are we near the end?” Keith asked him a couple hours later.

They’d been walking a leisurely pace, stopping every so often to buy a drink or snack, or just people watch. At one point they’d sat for an entire half an hour at the street viewing theater; a giant glass window that looked over the street where people could sit on benches arranged in tiers to watch the traffic drive by below. It’d been a calm day, despite the inner turmoil that Lance was experiencing. Spending time with Keith was effortlessly easy. They just clicked.

“Yeah, we’re just reaching the Javits Center now,” Lance said pointing towards the sprawling glass complex in front of them by the water.

“Oh,” Keith said, somewhat sadly. “I kinda wish it was longer.”

“We could sit here though for a bit, if you want?” Lance said motioning to the stepped seating that overlooked the Hudson River.

“Sure,” Keith nodded. They climbed up to the top section of benches and sat, facing the river. “What’s that on the other side?” he asked gesturing across the river.

“That’s Jersey,” Lance said. “It’s kind of… well… we don’t really go to New Jersey. It sort of useless for us? Well, unless we go into Union City to for Cuban food. But honestly, we can make that at home so we don’t go there often.”

“It kind of weird that you’re so close to the border of the nearest state,” Keith said leaning his elbows on his knees and resting his chin in his hands. “My house is at least 6 hours in every direction from any border to anything.”

“Jesus Christ, how big is Texas?” Lance said shaking his head in disbelief.

“Really fucking big,” Keith shrugged.

“Apparently,” Lance said. “I don’t think I could live somewhere so landlocked like that. You know, like inside the middle of the state. I like to be near the water. Even if it is the radioactive East River.” He saw a small smile play at the side of Keith’s mouth.

“I like it here,” Keith said quietly. He glanced over at Lance who was watching him with an expression that he knew was much to soft for just looking at a friend. “I thought I was going to hate all the people and the noise and the traffic and the buildings, but,” he looked back out towards the river, “it’s… surprisingly nice.”

Lance felt something inside him grow warm and his whole body felt fuzzy. “I’m glad you like it here.” He forced his eyes away from Keith’s profile and also looked out onto the water. “I was sort of… well I was sort of worried that you were gonna get here and hate it and hate… me… I guess.”

In Lance’s periphery he could see Keith look up at him with a mixed expression. “Why would you think I would hate you?”

“Uh, too high expectations,” Lance tried to play off as a joke. He briefly caught Keith’s gaze and the genuine confusion was too much for Lance’s insecurity to handle. “I don’t know I just… hate disappointing people. And you—” he reflexively made eye contact with Keith and immediately regretted it, he felt too vulnerable, “I didn’t want to disappoint you.”

He could see Keith was taken aback by Lance’s honesty. “You… you haven’t disappointed me. Not at all. I didn’t even think you would.”

“G–good,” Lance swallowed. “I’m glad. I’m just a worrier.” He tried to smile but it didn’t stick. The anxiety he felt was very real.

“Lance, I wouldn’t have come here if I thought I’d be miserable with you,” Keith said. Something loosened in Lance’s muscles. “I could be miserable at home.”  

Lance laughed softly. “That’s fair.”

“I came here because I… you’re my friend.”

That word felt so finite in that moment. The way Keith said it was like he’d already sorted Lance in that category, and that’s where he was going to stay. It wasn’t disenchantment that Lance felt in that moment, but a part of him deflated a bit. But it did feel like the reality check he needed.

“Yeah, you’re my friend too.” Lance could hear the note of sadness in his voice and he hated himself for letting it taint their conversation.

He didn’t even understand what he was feeling for Keith, how could he even let himself be upset that Keith wasn’t confessing a mutual attraction to him? Lance knew he was being ridiculous; it had barely been 24 hours and he was already feeling disappointed that his maybe “object of his affections” wasn’t absolutely conflicted in deep love for him. What a stupid thought.

“Hey um,” he began, forcing composure into his voice. “We should start heading towards the train. We don’t want to be on the train during rush hour.” He got up, and dusted off the back of his jeans with his hands, walking down the tiered benches without waiting for Keith to follow.

“Yeah, ok,” Keith said catching up with him quickly.

As they walked towards the train station, Lance tried to maintain a friendly distance between them. They were friends, they should act like it. Or more specifically he should act like it. He had let himself get lost in his own head and that was a dangerous place to be.

Chapter 4: If You're Gay and You Know It Clap Your Hands

Notes:

things were gay, and now they are gayer

---

Keith said point blank they were friends. That should have squashed anything feelings or hints of feelings or thoughts of possible feelings from Lance. It should have. But it didn’t.

If anything it only made it worse. It was like stating how exactly platonic Keith thought of their relationship, and highlighted how non–platonic Lance’s feelings were for Keith. And by that night it was basically completely confirmed.

Lance had been able to pass his feelings for Keith as a strong friendship when they’d been in different states. He’d been able to brush off his slight attraction to him as normal feelings of being in the presence of someone really good looking. He had even been able to ignore the constant churning and twisting in his gut he would get when Keith was laugh and smile and joke with him.

But now? Sitting on his bed at 1 in the morning, his eyes glued to Keith’s wet, toned back as he dressed after his shower, Lance couldn’t pretend anymore. He was, unequivocally, and undeniably, attracted to Keith.

He had an actual crush on Keith.

It was just about the worst realization anyone could have at 1 in the morning. He could actually feel himself getting angry with Keith for no reason other than he was forcing him to reevaluate his entire outlook and stance on his own sexuality. Also the fact that he had to spend another 5 and a half days with Keith, just marinating in his frustration. He was going to snap.

“Hey have you seen my sleeping shirt?” Keith asked running a hand through his damp hair as he looked around the floor of Lance’s room. He hand his towel draped around his shoulders and his hand on his hip just above the waistband of his red boxer briefs. Lance was pointedly staring at his phone in his hand.

“I think I saw it sticking out from under the air mattress,” Lance said, aggressively scrolling through instagram and not looking up at all.

“Oh yeah there it is, thanks,” Keith said picking it up from the floor. Lance could see in his peripheral vision, Keith hanging the towel on the closet door hook and pulling on his shirt. “Want me to turn off the light?” he asked pointing to the light switch on the wall next to him.

“Please do,” Lance said, ready to be in the dark so at least he would have to look at Keith. “Do you need another blanket or something?”

“No I’m ok, thanks,” Keith said. He could hear him climbing onto the airbed, the plastic sound of the mattress sticking and unsticking from the hardwood floor. Lance took that opportunity to get under his blankets as well, putting his phone to charge on the cord next to him, and willing his mind to stop thinking long enough for him to fall asleep. He gotten to just start not thinking when Keith spoke again. “Thanks for taking me to the High Line,” Keith said quietly. “And for everything that you’re doing and whatever you have planned for us this week. I don’t think I thanked you before so… thank you.”

“You did,” Lance said, his voice just as quiet. “But you’re welcome anyway. It’s really no problem. I wanted you to come here to do all those things. I’m just glad you’re not totally bored out of your mind.”

“I’m not bored,” Keith said. Lance could hear the small smile in his voice. It set his heart racing. There was another brief pause. “You know,” he began, sounding like the smile hadn’t left his face yet, “when you randomly messaged me over a year ago, I never thought we’d end up friends. And definitely not “fly cross country to stay with you and your family for a week” kind of friends.”

“Yeah me neither,” Lance chuckled softly. Words gathered in his mouth and he debated saying them until he waited too long and they just came tumbling out. “I’m really glad we are friends. You’re really important to me. And I hope… I hope I’m not being too forward when I say this, but I see us being friends for a very long time.”

Keith was silent for a while. The lack of response made Lance nervous, and he regretted opening his mouth. His mind went through scenarios where Keith told him that Lance was freaking him out, that they weren’t that close. Or scenes where Keith would agree, but in a way only to placate Lance. Or worst of all that Keith would say nothing and Lance would be left feeling like an asshole.

“I see that too,” Keith said, and Lance could still hear the small smile in his voice. It was like the ice in his veins got flushed away. “I’ve never… I’ve never really had a friend like you, Lance. You’re really honest with how you feel, even if it’s something serious… I like that about you.”

Lance felt his whole face flush. “Th–thank you,” he stuttered.

He wasn’t sure what to say. On one hand he wanted to say something like that about Keith, like how he liked that Keith was upfront and honest, or how Keith was considerate, or that Keith could step out of his comfort zone even if he was nervous or scared. He liked that and so much more about Keith. The way he was grateful of everything anyone did for him, even if it was small. Or how he always showed people he was listening. And that no matter what he said, teasing or joking or not, he was kind at the end of it all.

But on the other hand if he said something he was sure it was going to give himself away. There was nothing he could say to Keith that would be divorced of enough emotion to sound platonic in that moment. He felt horrible, like he was taking advantage of Keith’s kindness and using it to fuel his feelings for him, but he couldn’t help it. Keith’s direct way of speaking was what endeared him to Keith in the first place, how was he supposed to react when he was hearing it out loud with such sincerity?

Lance opened and closed his mouth half a dozen times before he thought of something to say. Afraid it’d been too long he whispered Keith’s name to see if he’d fallen asleep. When he had gotten no response, he whispered it a bit louder a few more times until he was certain Keith had fallen asleep.

A bit disappointed in himself, Lance pulled the covers tighter around himself, turned his back to face Keith, and went to sleep.

---

“So Pidge is super cool and she’s like really smart and stuff and like just a super dope person,” Lance said as they got in the car. “And Hunk has been my friend since literally pre-school, and he’s just one of the most awesomest people ever.”

“Ok,” Keith nodded, sliding into the passenger’s seat.

“Yeah, and they are just really great and they are my best friends ever,” Lance said buckling his seatbelt. He paused, eyeing Keith buckle himself in. “You’re ok spending the day with my friends right?”

“... yes?” Keith said, looking at him confused.

“Well I mean, I don’t want to just force you to hang out with my friends that you’ve never met and maybe you’re uncomfortable or you don’t want to or—”

“Lance,” Keith cut him off, placing his hand on Lance’s shoulder to get his attention. “Shut up. You worry too much.”

Lance tried to ignore the way his stomach lurched when Keith put his hand on his arm. “Ok then,” he turned on the car and backed out of the driveway and started driving down the block.

Lance didn’t feel like he worried too much. He felt like he was worrying the exact right amount for someone in his situation. He was about to bring his friend (and crush, he had come to terms with that the night before, and had it re–enforced this morning while he watched a sleep–soft Keith talk quietly with his mom over a cup of coffee at the kitchen table) and introduce him to his best friends, who knew him better than anyone. Lance knew that they were going to see through him in a minute.

All his denying and swearing that he was 100% straight and not interested in Keith At All was out the window now. He had a sinking feeling that he had known for a while now but he had been trying to play that off as a friend crush, something platonic and definitely not gay. But he couldn’t claim that now, not with the way that Keith’s smile made his stomach flip and his touch was burning and he could listen to him talk for hours.

Yeah, he was definitely not straight.

He began the short drive to Hunk’s house that he’d done a thousand times. But now it sort of felt surreal with Keith in the car with him. It was like a dream, but not in the magical romantic sense but more in non-linear type dream where he’s a pregnant in Rhode Island and the road is water and he’s sitting with Keith in a car on the moon. It just didn’t compute.

The sense of his worlding colliding only grew worse as he pulled up in front of Hunk’s house where Pidge and Hunk were already waiting out front, and they climbed in the car, greeting Keith as they slid into the back seat. Keith sat nervously in his seat giving them small waves hello, glancing at Lance for a cue on what to say— which just made Lance’s heart ache.

As his friends buckled in, Lance saw Hunk and Pidge trying to get his attention in the rearview mirror. He looked up just in time to see Pidge pointing discreetly at Keith and then giving him a thumbs up. Lance looked away mortified.

“Keith this is Pidge and Hunk, my best friends,” Lance said twisting around in his seat to introduce them, ready to fill the silence. “And guys this is Keith.”

“It’s really great to finally meet you, we’ve heard so much about you,” Hunk said earnestly. Lance shot him a dry glare that he responded to with a confused shrug.

“Yeah Lance has been really excited for you to come here and for us to meet you,” Pidge said. “He’s talked about you so much in the past few weeks, I was beginning to wonder if he made you up.” Lance glared at her too. She responded by give him an exaggerated thumbs up.

Keith let out a small nervous laugh. “No I’m… I’m real. I’ve heard a lot about you guys too, it’s nice to finally meet you in person. You know, put a face to the name.”

“Ok that’s enough introductions,” Lance said feeling a bit overwhelmed by his two different friend worlds mixing like that. “We’ve got a 40 minute drive into the Bronx and I have a bomb ass playlist for this exact occasion.” He plugged the auxiliary cord into his phone and set up his Lit AF playlist. Instantly, the not so soothing sounds of Toxic blasted through the speakers.

“Jesus Lance it’s like not even 9 in the morning,” Pidge groaned from behind him.

“It’s never too early for Britney,” Lance said sliding on his sunglasses and looking at her in his rearview mirror.

“Debatable,” Pidge grumbled as Lance pulled away from in front of Hunk’s house and began to drive towards the highway.

Lance enjoyed driving, it was relaxing for him. Blasting music and singing along, rolling the windows down and letting the wind blow through the car, flipping off idiot drivers on the road; Lance enjoyed all of it. He loved driving. Even if that drive was through 30 extra minutes of traffic across a bridge, listening to Pidge and Hunk make up ludacris lyrics to the songs he so painstakingly chose for his perfect driving playlist.  

But what he found he really liked, was driving with Keith. He was surprisingly the perfect copilot, reading off the directions from his phone exactly when he needed them. Keith didn’t fidget or block his mirror and he even would keep an eye out for Lance’s blind spot. He was the calming presence that Lance really felt was missing from his little group.

There was Lance, he was the loud and outspoken one of the group, always ready to make a joke or a comment or both. Then there was Hunk, the biggest friend with the smallest emotional threshold. And Pidge, the snarkiest, most sarcasm filled person Lance had ever known.

But Keith added something new to the dynamic that Lance didn't even realize he was missing until now. Keith was quiet and calm. And every so often Lance would see a burst of the fire that lay underneath the surface, (like when a driver cut them off on the Cross Bronx and Keith had rolled down his window to yell a string of impressively creative insults at him) and it made him more human in Lance's eyes. He liked it.

By the time they pulled into the expansive parking lot, they had just about exhausted Lance's playlist. The hour long ride had left them restless and they practically all spilled out of the car as soon as Lance parked. It was full for a Tuesday morning but not annoyingly packed.

“Should we leave the food or bring it with us?” Lance asked holding the backpack of packed sandwiches his dad had made for them that morning. When Lance and Keith came down this morning and told him they were going to the zoo later, he insisted on making everyone food to bring. He claimed it was because it would be simpler. Lance said it was because he was cheap. They were both sort of right.

“Yeah bring it, so that way we don't have to come back for it later,” Hunk said, taking the backpack and putting his arms through the straps. “I'll carry it.”

“Oh cool, thanks. Alright let's go get on line,” Lance said locking his car and moving towards the end of the parking lot to the entrance ticket booths at the other end.

“How much is the admission?” Keith asked falling into step with Lance.

“Dude don't worry about it, I got you covered,” Lance said waving his hand dismissively.

“Lance, I can't let you pay for everything for me,” Keith frowned.

“Yes you can,” Lance smiled smugly. Keith's frown only deepened. “Aw come on,” he nudged Keith with his shoulder. “Relax, let me treat you. You paid to get here, I'm just trying to even it out.”

Keith looked at him with a mix of amusement and resignation. “Fine,” Keith sighed.

They got to the end of the line and waited only a few minutes in the hot June sun until they were called to a window. Lance pointed slid over his card to pay after ordering both his and Keith's ticket.  Once they had their tickets they took a step to the side to wait for Hunk and Pidge. Lance could tell Keith was feeling slightly awkward but he was hiding it well. It was the same reserved, measured kind of quiet that he'd been when he'd first met Lance's parents and siblings.

He looked at him out of the corner of his eye behind his sunglasses. Keith had his arms crossed loosely across his chest and was watching all the people go by into the zoo, looking the image of unaffected. But Lance saw the vague, overwhelmed tinge to his expression.

“Hey,” Lance said softly, putting his hand on the small of Keith's back to get his attention. “You ok?”

“Yeah,” Keith nodded, seeming to snap out of his thoughts.

“Ok,” Lance said with a small smile, his hand lingering on Keith's back for a few moments until Hunk and Pidge walked over. “Ready?”

“Hell yeah, let’s go see some fucking animals,” Pidge said punching at the air and psyching herself up. “Love those things,” she added as she went towards the entrance.

“How does she move so fast, she’s so small,” Hunk said shaking his head. “Hey wait up!” Hunk called out and rushed to follow her. “I wanna go in the aviary first.”

Lance and Keith exchanged looks and followed at a normal pace.

---

Lance had lasted 60 glorious minutes. An hour of watching Hunk freak out at the tiger exhibit, and listening to Keith talk at surprising length about lizards in the Reptile Room, and having to literally hold back Pidge from yelling at a kid that said that gazelles were “punk ass bitches”, and buying stupid novelty cups at the gift shop, Lance couldn’t outrun the inevitable forever. Even though he really, really tried.

He made it to lunch, which was longer than he had expected to get to. Lance was sure that Pidge was going to say something when he pulled Keith by the hand through the gorilla exhibit— which in his defense was very dark and crowded, not that Pidge would buy that anyway. He was convinced that Hunk was going to make a comment when he had noticed that Lance was inadvertently sitting back leaning on his arms and one of his arms happened to be slightly behind Keith in a way that could have been mistaken for him putting his arm around him. And Lance was out right surprised that neither of them made mention of the way he totally full out blushed when Keith came to stand behind him in the wolf exhibit, placing his arms on either side of the railing, caging him in and making Lance feel all sorts of emotions he just knows his friends caught.

In retrospect, Lance was lucky he’d gotten an hour with how obvious he was being.

“So,” Pidge said unwrapping the tinfoil around her heaping sandwich, “you like Keith.” They’d settled down to eat their lunch by the flamingos and Lance knew that Pidge had calculated that she’d ask that exactly at the moment when Keith and Hunk walked over into the cafe to get napkins so that they’d have about a minute to have their conversation.

Lance took a long drink from his mostly melted ice–water orange Fanta through the elephant trunk straw he’d just bought. He debated on answering Pidge directly and admitting that he may have been wrong about his feelings in the past. But he decided giving in wasn’t his style. “What makes you say that?” he asked pushing around the ice in his cup.

She scoffed. “Lance, bubbala, don’t insult me by playing dumb.” Lance twisted up his face in annoyance. “Look, you and I both know you’re not… you know… Mr. Hetero.”

“Um I didn’t know that ,” Lance said glancing at the doors of the cafe to make sure Keith and Hunk weren’t back yet. “As of last week I was straight.”

“Past tense?”

Lance frowned, “... fine, yes past tense.”  He planted his elbows on the table and angrily rested his chin in his hands.

He heard the sound of the cafe door opening and he looked over to see Hunk and Keith walking out, each holding a stack of napkins and several soda bottles in their arms. Hunk was talking to him and Keith was smiling. Not only smiling, but laughing. Lance didn’t even have to know how to react but somehow that was a reaction.

Pidge leaned over and patted him gently on the shoulder. “Mazel tov, welcome the LGBT side of the world.”

“Fuck you,” Lance mumbled to Pidge as Keith sat down on the bench next to him.

“The vending machine broke when I put in my dollar and emptied out everything,” Hunk said excitedly setting 3 bottles of Coke on the table.

“I got you an orange soda,” Keith said handing him a bottle.

“Thanks,” Lance said trying to keep his voice sounding normal and not like he’d just come out to his best friend. Clearly it hadn’t worked.

“Are you ok?” Keith asked looking at him curiously.

“Yeah I’m totally fine,” Lance nodded trying to sound believable as he opened the bottle and poured the soda into his cup. He could feel Keith’s gaze on him and it only made him feel more obvious about not being ok at all.

The weight of what he’d just admitted out loud to Pidge was just starting to hit him. It was one thing to say it in his head, but saying it out loud? That made it real, it made it true. And it was rapidly becoming too much to deal with.

Lance spent the entirety of their lunch answering his friends in as few words as possible. He could tell that it had put Keith on edge but he just didn’t know how to make himself stop. Even when they finished eating and started walking around the zoo again he could tell he just wasn’t acting the same. He was quieter, more distant.

He just kept going over the brief conversation he’d had with Pidge over and over in his mind. He hadn’t exactly said “ yes, I’m gay and I have a crush on Keith ,” but it had been heavily implied. It was incredibly frustrating because he didn’t feel gay, but he also knew that having a crush on your dude friend wasn’t exactly the most heterosexual thing. It was all very confusing.

For the rest of the time he tried to pretend to be enjoying himself but instead he was just forcing himself to look happy while feeling wholly overwhelmed. Lance could feel the anxiety and confusion ebbing off Keith as he tried to have a good time going through all the exhibits. He felt bad that he wasn’t being more fun for his friend, but he was grateful that Pidge and Hunk had stepped up and took over as tour guides and fun ambassadors to Keith.

Watching his friend have fun with his two best friends was an odd experience. Partly because of his massive crush on Keith, he knew he was seeing everything with rose-colored glasses but he didn’t really care; he was frustrated and confused enough as it was, why add another layer?

And the other part being that it was kind of amazing how well Keith fell into place in their little group. He’d first noticed it in the car, Keith was able to fit a small niche of quiet and snarky that was missing between Pidge’s loud curt sarcasm and Hunk’s soft honesty. There was a piece of Lance that felt proud that his friend melded so well the rest of them. And another piece that, despite feeling very off balance at the moment, wanted to hoard his friend all to himself.

By the time they they tiredly shuffled back to the car a couple hours later, Lance only felt worse. Instead of mulling it over and moving on, he started to second guess himself and all his actions towards Keith the entire time he’d been in New York, worried that he’d been a lot more obvious than he’d originally thought. Piled with the guilt of being sort of vacant for the second half of their trip to the zoo, Lance didn’t even put on his playlist when he got in the car. He just turned on the car, pulled out of the parking lot and drove out of the zoo.

Chapter 5: Listen Here Buddy, I Might Not Know A Lot But,

Notes:

this chapter is a little short so there's gonna be a double update today!!!!!

also i think you guys are gonna like this chapter ;)

---

The drive back to Queens was short and quiet. Pidge and Hunk had fallen asleep in the back only minutes after driving out. Keith however, stayed awake, providing clarification on directions from his phone and light small talk. Lance could tell that he was also very tired but was making sure to stay awake so that Lance wouldn’t be alone. Of course, that act of kindness only made Lance feel worse.

Lance pulled up in front of Pidge’s house, then Hunk’s, dropping them off with a wave and promise to text them later. They both said to goodbye enthusiastically to Keith, saying that they hope they’d get to hang out at least one last time before he left, to which Keith happily agreed. The sentiment was nice and it made Lance feel better, for a moment, until he would make eye contact with one of them and the knowing sympathetic look on their face reminded him that they knew .

Then suddenly it was just Keith and Lance in the car. Just them sitting in the car in the driveway, shaded from the hot late afternoon sun by the large tree on Lance’s front lawn. Neither of them making a move to get out. And the tension in the air was thick and palpable. Lance had a feeling a conversation he didn’t want to have was coming.

And of course Keith was looking at him the way he had been all day: nervous with a mask of unaffected reservation. It was painful because Lance knew he was the reason that Keith looked nervous. He knew that he should have just held it together better, instead of falling to pieces and leaving Keith in the lurch. Lance wanted to make him feel better. He wanted to make it up to him.

“Hey… is everything alright?” Keith asked carefully after a moment. Lance had been right; he didn't want to have this conversation.

“Yeah I’m fine,” Lance lied. He fiddled with the keys in his hand, keeping himself from looking up at Keith.

“Are you sure? Because it sort of felt like you were kind of… avoiding me,” Keith said sounding both hurt and accusatory. Lance felt horrible. “After lunch you kind of just, stopped talking to me and I'm not sure why?”

“Oh, sorry,” Lance said lamely, knowing he couldn't very well tell Keith why. “I didn’t mean to avoid you.”

“Did I do something wrong?”

His words pierced Lance’s heart in a way that he wished hadn’t hurt so much. The vulnerability in Keith’s voice stung him. He looked up at Keith from his fingers twiddling his keys in his idle hands. He looked concerned in the guarded sort of way that only Keith could manage to make still look so genuine. “No, Keith you didn’t do anything wrong.”

“I thought maybe I had said something that upset you,” Keith said with a shrug. “I didn’t did I?”

“No Keith you’re perfect,” Lance sighed feeling like he might just say anything to make Keith feel better. “I was just talking to Pidge and I realized somethings and my mind was preoccupied. I didn’t mean to make you feel ignored.”

“It’s ok,” Keith said understandingly.

“No, it’s not. That was a dick thing to do. I’m sorry.”

“Really Lance, it’s ok.”

“No seriously, I feel really bad.”

“Lance, it’s fine.”

“But I want to make it up to you if I can?”

“You don’t have to.”

“I want to.”

“Lance—”  

“Keith I feel really like should say something, I—”

Lance wasn’t sure exactly what happened. All he knew was that he had been talking and then a second later, Keith’s face was by his in the space of the driver’s seat and their lips were connected.

His eyes were wide open and he could see Keith's face up close to his. Keith had his eyes closed tight. His lips were slightly chapped but nice, pushing against his mouth with a desperate pressure.

This was entirely unexpected.

Lance was just frozen. He couldn't believe what was happening so he did nothing because he didn't know what to do. A voice in the back of his mind told him to kiss back, lose himself in the kiss, but by the time he thought to do that, Keith was pulling away. And he looked mortified.

“Oh god,” Keith breathed turning away and covering his face with his hands. “I can't believe I just—”

“Keith,” Lance began, his voice thick in his throat. He wanted to move his arms towards Keith but his limbs felt like they were filled with concrete. “Keith, I didn't mean to not—”

“Please don't say anything,” Keith asked, his voice still muffled by his hands. “Can I just pretend that never happened?”

“Uh…” Lance blinked confusedly, not expecting any of the last few seconds. “I mean… ok, but I kinda want to say that I—”

“ Lance please ,” Keith begged, removing his hands from his face and forcing himself to look at Lance, his eyes pleading him. “Please just let's forget that happened.”

“I… I don't want to,” Lance said in a rush. Keith stared at him with leery trepidation. “Keith,” he took a deep breath, “I like you.”

Keith sighed, rubbing his palm across his eyes. He shook his head a few times before answering, “no, you don't.”

That had not been the response that Lance thought he was going to get, not after what had just happened. He was confused to say the least. “But… I do. Keith, I really like you.”

“Look,” Keith sighed again. “It's nice that you're reacting, you know—” he gestured vaguely at Lance, “—like this. But this isn't my first mistake.”

Lance looked at his quizzically. “Mistake?”

“Kissing a straight guy,” Keith clarified.

“I'm not straight,” Lance said. Hearing the words out loud in his own voice was like hearing confirmation of a universal fact. It felt weirdly good to say it out loud.

Keith looked at him with something that Lance could only describe as pity. “Yeah you are.”

“No I… I really do like you,” Lance insisted. “You didn't misread anything, I was just shocked. I really do think I'm gay.”

“You're not gay,” Keith rolled his eyes. He looked tired, like he'd been through this conversation before.

“Fine, I'm bisexual. I don't care,” Lance said starting to feel like he was going to have to fight to get Keith to believe him. “All I know is I like you a lot, and I think I've liked you since before you came here but now I'm sure.”

Keith looked at him for a long time, his eyes scanning Lance's face. “Are you being serious?” Lance frantically nodded. “I don't understand.”

“Keith,” Lance began, turning more in his seat to better face him. “I've been freaking out for the past few days because I've been coming to terms with the fact that I 100% developed a crush on you without even realizing it, and then I realized it all at once as soon as you stepped off the plane. I'm not making this up. I'm not messing with you. I am genuinely, in actual emotional turmoil because I really like you and I don't know what to do about it.”

Keith sat there the his whole speech without moving at all. He looked shocked by the end of it. After a few silent moments, Lance debated on speaking again but he heard Keith's throaty voice. “Is that why you've been acting so weird around me?”

Lance let out a breathy laugh. “Yeah.”

“Because I mean, one minute we're laughing and having fun and you're right next to me, and the next minute you're keeping at least 5 feet of distance between us and barely talking,” Keith said. “I just thought I was being obvious and I was making you uncomfortable.”

“Obvious about what?” Lance asked.

Keith looked at him incredulously. “Lance. I just kissed you. What do you think?”

It took Lance a moment. “Wait you like me?” Keith nodded. “Wait what!?”

“I thought you knew?” Keith said confused.

“Well if knew I might have freaked out a bit less!” Lance cried. He took a heavy breath and let it out. Lance stared into space trying to find clues that he'd missed and he couldn't think of any. “Why didn't you tell me?” he asked, turning to Keith.

Keith gave him an annoyed frown. “Oh so I was supposed to tell one of my only friends that I was coming to visit and stay in their house, that I was gay and liked them?” Keith asked sarcastically. “Are you insane?”

“Ok, fair enough,” Lance exhaled. He stared at his keys in his hand again. The late afternoon sun was flittering through the tree leaves above them casting shadow patterns on them. He took a moment to watch the light dance across the dashboard before he spoke again.

“So…” Keith began, looking at him apprehensively, “what now?” He looked just about as confused as Lance felt.

“I guess we… talk?” Lance suggested with a shrug.

Keith seemed to contemplate that for a while. “Yeah ok let's go inside.”

Silently, they both got out of the car, taking their bags with them. There was a weird tension between them that Lance couldn’t figure out exactly what it meant. All he knew was that 10 minutes ago he was confused and very on edge, and now there was a lightness and excitement in his chest that he couldn’t describe.

Lance hadn’t paid attention to see if his parents car was parked in front of the house and he stepped into the house to discover it was empty. “Oh they must not be back from work yet,” Lance said idly, setting his bag down in the living room.

“Oh,” Keith responded with a slight nod.

They both toed off their shoes and walked up the stairs and down the hallway to Lance’s bedroom. Neither of them speaking or communicating, but they both knew that they’d want to talk in a comfortable place. Lance opened the door and let Keith inside before following him in and closing the door behind him with a neat click.

“Um so I think we should probably talk about what this means,” Lance said leaning back against the door, gesturing between them. Keith stood in the middle of the room with his arms crossed. He looked like he was trying to make himself look smaller in the room, standing in the empty space on the floor with the air mattress pushed up against the wall. “You know, like first, before we do anything else. Just so we know. So there’s no confusion.”

“Yeah probably,” Keith nodded. There was a long pause. “Or…”

“Or?”

“Or we can just make out and think about this later,” Keith suggested.

“That’s a much better idea,” Lance said crossing the room over to him in two long strides.

They came together like a crash, both of them reaching out for the other in unison. Keith’s lips found his almost instantly, pressing them together with ardent desperation that knocked the wind out of Lance. A flurry of hands grabbed onto Lance’s shirt, pulling him so close to Keith he could feel his heart beating fast against his chest. Lance barely had time to process where to place his hands because he was too busy concentrating on the way that Keith’s tongue was licking against his lips.

It took Lance a moment, but eventually he got control of himself. He placed a hand on Keith’s waist, holding him close against him, and brought the other up to Keith’s jaw, cupping it gently. Lance brought some direction to their kiss, opening his mouth slightly to let Keith lick his way inside. The feeling of their tongues meeting sent a spike down Lance’s back and he couldn’t stop the low moan that came out of him.

Kissing Keith was like constant confirmation of his feelings. It was like all the hesitation and fears he had had about Keith and his own emotions were melting away leaving only the warm comforting feeling of being wanted as much as he wanted Keith. He felt the pressure in his back and neck ease with each kiss, relaxing under Keith's touch. It was wonderful.

Slowly, Lance began to walk them towards the bed behind Keith. Which each step, Lance kissed Keith harder until the back of Keith’s knees hit the bed and they both toppled on top, not disconnecting their lips for more than a second. Keith moved slightly backwards, giving Lance room to kneel between his legs.

Lance took the opportunity to move both his hands to either side of Keith head, keeping himself hovering over him. Keith's hands were still fisted in his shirt, keeping them pressed together, moving in slow, shallow thrusts against each other. The feeling of their bodies pressed against each other was overwhelming for Lance and he pulled his mouth off Keith's to let out a shuddering breath.

“Woah,” Lance breathed, tilting his head away from Keith's face that was still very close underneath him. He could feel Keith's hands unfurl from his shirt and gently hold onto his waist. He turned his head to look at his face; he was flushed and his lips were slick and kiss reddened and Lance wanted to kiss him again. “That was definitely better than talking.”

Keith laughed softly; it was light and raspy like he was still out of breath. Lance wanted to kiss him again. “Yeah I thought so too.”

“To think we could have been doing this the whole time,” Lance said, his eyes gazing over Keith's face. The way that he was laying back made his hair fall out from around his face, and Lance could appreciate just how pretty he was from up close.

“What a wasted opportunity,” Keith snarked with small grin. Lance wanted to kiss him. He found that everything made him want to kiss Keith.

“We have time to make up for it,” Lance shrugged, smirking down at him. “But actually,” he sighed, “we probably should talk though.”

“Yeah probably,” Keith exhaled. “Or…”

“Or?”

“We continue making out and we leave the whole talking thing to future Lance and Keith,” he suggested.

“You know what,” Lance began, “that's a great idea.” They both grinned.

“So what are you waiting for?” Keith smirked, pulling at Lance's hips. Lance didn't waste any time pressing his lips against Keith's.

Chapter 6: At Least I Know I'm Bi

Notes:

!!!!!!!!! it's finally!!!!! happening!!! things!!!!

---

“So what have you boys been up to?”

The question was innocent enough; his mother most likely really just wanted to know how their trip to the zoo went and if they’d done anything else fun. She’d just walked through the door when Lance and Keith had come down the stairs, quickly taking their hands off each other before she could see. They had spent the better part of half an hour kissing in Lance’s bedroom, and had left to go get a snack when Lance’s mother went through the door.

“Oh um,” Lance began, trying to nonchalantly wipe his mouth to remove any obvious evidence from their activities. “We went to the zoo with Pidge and Hunk.”

“How was it?” his mom said, setting her purse on the armchair.

“Good, it was really good,” Lance said making sure to keep a non-suspicious amount of distance between him and Keith. “A lot of fun.” He and Keith shared a look while his mom looked down to pull off her heels.

“I’m glad,” she smiled at them, clearly not noticing anything weird. “Did you guys want a snack or something? I’m starving. I think we still have some croquetas that your father made in the fridge somewhere.” She walked barefooted through the living room and through the archway and into the kitchen.

Lance waited until she was completed out of sight before sighing. “Holy shit that was close,” he whispered, leaning into Keith’s side. “I completely forgot that she was on her way home.”

“Yeah it was close,” Keith said lightly rubbing Lance’s back.

“We gotta be more careful,” Lance sighed, resting his head on Keith’s shoulder.

“Yeah,” Keith nodded. Lance tilted his head to look at Keith. His lips were still full and pink and Lance couldn’t help himself. He leaned up and pressed a brief kiss against his mouth. They broke apart quickly but the feeling lingered on his lips. Lance kept his face close to Keith’s just enjoying the warm of their mixed breath on his face.

“Hey guys there are some croquetas here if you want some,” Lance’s mom called out from the kitchen. The sound of her voice was enough to snap them apart.

“Yeah coming mami,” Lance said. He turned back to Keith and gave him an apologetic look that Keith returned with an accepting shrug.

Nothing quite prepared Lance for having dinner with his family, sitting next to the boy he had just made out with, and pretending like nothing was different. It was definitely a unique experience, passing plates to his sister while hooking his ankle with Keith's under the table. And it was wholly bizarre to talk normally with his dad while Keith's hand rested low on his back.

The whole thing was weird. It was weirdly awesome. But it was still weird.

They had made a silent agreement not to say anything about their change in relationship. Even though they had yet to talk about it, Lance knew that they were definitely something different now. Lance still wasn't sure what they were or what they will decide they are, but he was quite content for the moment to continue as they were as long as Keith continued to sneak him knowing smiles when no one was looking.

But still the whole situation was still weird to Lance. First of all he felt giddy— a word he'd never used to describe himself before. Yet it oddly fit how he felt. He was just happy, for no explainable reason (at least not one that he could give his parents. He wasn't so much worried that they'd disapprove of him being with a boy but more concerned that they'd move Keith's sleeping arrangement to somewhere less available.)

Secondly, he couldn't recall being this happy with any of his ex girlfriends. Not on any first date or special occasion or anything, he'd never been so happy as he was playing dominos with Keith and his dad. It felt stupid to be this content but at the same time he didn't care. Keith had his foot running up and down his leg and they keep exchanging grins and Lance was just so happy.

---

 

Keith lightly ran his fingers through Lance's hair, brushing aside the small tufts of hair that hung down over his ears. Lance had his eyes closed as he laid back on his bed feeling more comfortable than he'd been in a long time. He lazily rubbed the tips of his fingers up and down Keith's back against his tshirt.

They were curled up on Lance's bed, the windows open letting the cool summer night breeze. It was sometime in the middle of the night, Lance wasn't sure what time but it didn't matter. Time didn't feel like it existed in that moment. Just him and the boy laying on the bed next to him.

“Your hair is soft,” Keith said quietly, playing with the ends of his hair.

“Thanks, I use a lot of conditioner,” Lance smiled softly. He twisted around and buried his face in the crook of Keith's neck. “You smell really good,” he mumbled against his skin.

“Thank you,” he heard Keith chuckled lightly. “I use a lot of Old Spice.”

Lance laughed, humming against Keith's skin. “Well your skin is soft,” he said twisting his body more towards Keith's.

“So is yours,” Keith responded trailing his fingers down from Lance's hair to his neck. “Are we just gonna point things out about each other all night?”

“I'm just trying to notice everything about you that I can,” Lance said quietly. “Things that you have to be in person to notice.”

He could feel Keith stiffen slightly in his arms. “Me too,” he whispered after a moment. There was a long pause. Keith continued running his fingers gently through Lance's hair.

“Should we talk about it now?,” Lance asked moving his head and looking up at Keith. His hand stilled in Lance's hair. Even in the dark of his bedroom only illuminated by the distant tungsten streetlights, Lance could see the hesitation on Keith's face. “Or not,” he swallowed.

“Lance,” Keith sighed. He looked like he was struggling to come up with the right words. “We have a good thing right now. Let's just leave it at that.”

Something in Lance's chest tightened. He couldn't tell if it was anxiety or nerves but he didn't want to push the point. He wanted to get back to being blissfully happy cuddling next to Keith. And if that meant pretending like they didn't absolutely need to talk about what this between them meant, he was ok with that. At least he thought so.

---

 

That morning Lance awoke feeling comfortably warm and secure. It took him a few moments to realize that he wasn't alone in his bed, in fact he was curled up in Keith's arms with their legs intertwined under the covers. Keith's left arm was draped loosely over his stomach, keeping him pressed up against Keith's chest. He thought sleeping cuddled up to someone would be unbearable, but he was surprised to find that he was very content to stay right where he was.

Lance laid there for a while, just enjoying the rise and fall of Keith's chest breathing against him. The way that he'd unconsciously clench and unclench his hand on Lance's abdomen. How he’d shift in place but never let go of him.

He gave it a full ten minutes before he had to extract himself from Keith’s grasp so he could use the bathroom. It was a slow process of trying to get up without waking Keith until he finally managed to get out of his bed with Keith still sleeping. Lance turned to watched Keith curl in on himself, clearly missing the weight and warmth of Lance next to him. Seeing that was enough to make Lance hurry up to use the bathroom quickly so he could return back to laying in bed with him.

A few minute later, Lance stepped out of the bathroom and went back down the hallway to his bedroom. He wa just about to crawl back into bed when he saw his phone light up with a message notification. Lance reached over and grabbed his phone reading over the text illuminated on the screen.

Hunk: I think I left my sunglasses in your car, do you mind if I stop by and get them? I’m on my way to work

Lance quickly typed out a response.

Lance: yeah man no worries, I’ll meet you outside in a few minutes

Trying to keep as quiet as possible, Lance grabbed his pair of discarded jeans from where he had draped it over his desk chair and pulled them on. He stuffed his phone into his back pocket and walked out of his room, silently closing the door behind him. Once outside his room, he headed for the stairs, going down to the first floor and slipping his shoes on.

Lance grabbed his car keys from the hook by the door and stepped outside onto the front steps of the house. He sat at the top step, scrolling idly through his instagram before he heard Hunk call out to him.

“Hey,” Hunk said walking up the pathway to the front steps. “I didn't wake you right?”

“Nah, I was already up,” Lance said waving him off as he stood up. “You think the glasses are in the car?” he asked walking them over to his light blue car in the driveway. He unlocked the doors and gestured for Hunk to look inside.

“Yeah, I think I dropped them yesterday when I was getting out of the car,” Hunk said kneeling on the seat so he could lean inside and look around. “You didn’t see them right?”

Lance’s mind instantly provided him the imagery of the last thing he had done in the car. “No sorry I didn’t,” Lance said blinking away the memory.

“So are you feeling better?” Hunk asked from inside the car. “You seemed kinda weird during lunch and for the rest of the day afterward. I didn’t want to ask at the time, plus Pidge said you were dealing with some stuff.”

“Yeah…” Lance said rubbing the back of his neck. “About that…”

“About what?”

“I was dealing with some stuff,” Lance said looking away from Hunk’s back. His hand tapped on the car door nervously. “I still am dealing with it really… I’m uh… I like Keith.” There was a long pause, and Lance could hear that Hunk had stopped moving in the car completely. “Like, like like him.”

Hunk moved backwards and turned around on the seat to face Lance. He looked surprised but not shocked, as if he’d known all along but he wasn’t expecting Lance to have owned up to it so soon. “Yeah alright man, thank you for telling me.”

Lance made eye contact with him but then quickly looked away before he lost his confidence to say the next bit. “Um also… we kinda made out last night.” Hunk stared at him blankly. “Me and Keith.” Hunk said nothing. “Actually we made out a bunch of times last night… he’s asleep in my bed right now.”

Hunk just continued to stare at him. Lance started to get nervous under his gaze. He was relieved when he finally spoke. “Well that was fast.” Lance let out a small laugh. “I mean congrats man, but like damn that was fast.”

“Yeah kinda,” Lance laughed.

“Wow,” Hunk said shaking his head lightly. “So are you guys like… together now?”

“Um, well we… we aren’t, but like—it’s not something, um… we haven’t really talked about it yet,” Lance said trying for nonchalance.

“So you guys just hooked up then?” Hunk asked, looking at him curiously. “That didn’t really seem like your style…”

“Yeah but it’s cool,” Lance nodded, stuffing his hands into his pockets. “It’s not like it’s casual or anything. I mean, we both said that we liked each other so…”

“Ok,” Hunk said. “But you guys didn’t talk about your feelings in the context of a relationship or anything?”

“... Not exactly.”

“Ok,” Hunk said tightly, like he was biting his tongue.

“What is it?” Lance asked apprehensively.

“Nothing,” Hunk shook his head. “It’s just that,” he sighed, “I know you, and you tend to fall very hard, very fast. And I’m afraid that you are seeing more into this than is actually there.”

“I’m not,” Lance disagreed. “We both like each other. This isn’t like some random hook up. I told him I have feelings for him, that I was serious about it. He knows that I’m not just messing around.”

“Ok,” Hunk said with a nod. “Lance you know I’m not trying to belittle your feelings, I’m just worried about you. You’re my best friend.”

“Of course,” Lance said agreeingly. “I know that. But you don’t have to worry. Seriously. I’m being 100% honest when I say that I feel really, really good about this. He’s… he’s  special.”

Hunk looked up at him with a pleased smile. “I’m really glad, Lance. He seems really nice, I like him. I hope he deserves you.”

“Thanks,” Lance laughed.

“No problem,” Hunk said. He turned back into the car and searched around some more. “Ah, got them.” He pulled out his sunglasses from underneath the seat. “Thank you.”

“Yeah any time,” Lance nodded, waiting for Hunk to step out of the car before he closed the door and locked the car. “I’ll see you later?” He outstretched his arm to say goodbye.

“Later,” Hunk said before clapping Lance’s hand.

Lance briefly watched Hunk walk away before going back inside his house. Having not seen any of his parents cars out front, Lance felt no need to be stealthy as he went through the house. He kicked off his shoes and took the stairs up two at a time, and crossing the hallway in a few short strides. Lance took a bit of care to open the door slowly and quietly, but when he peeked his head inside he saw that Keith was already awake and scrolling on his phone.

“Oh you’re awake,” Lance said coming into the room. He closed the door behind him and crossed the room, climbing over Keith and onto the bed.

“Yeah I woke up and you weren’t here,” Keith said locking his phone and placing it on the night table. He twisted in place to face Lance who was lying down on top of the covers next to him.

“Sorry about that,” Lance said softly smiling at him as he brushed some hair out of his face. “Hunk left something in my car, I had to go open it for him.”

“Oh ok,” Keith nodded. He moved closer, pushing his face into Lance's neck. His skin was warm and soft from sleep and it felt amazing the way he was nuzzling against Lance. “What have to planned for us today?”

“I don't have a plan for us,” Lance said with a one shoulder shrug. His hands found their way to Keith's back, pulling him closer. “I thought I'd schedule in a relaxing Do Nothing Day.”

“Sounds great,” Keith mumbled into his neck.

“Was there anything you wanted to do?” Lance asked, bringing his arm around Keith's back and holding him close.

“Nothing sounds pretty great actually,” Keith sighed contently.

Lance's mind went to the conversation he had had with Hunk outside. He thought about how they probably should talk about this now that they had some time to think. Lance opened his mouth to speak but then he remembered what Keith had said the night before. “We have a good thing right now. Let's just leave it at that.” That stopped Lance from saying anything.

“Ok,” he said cuddling closer against Keith. “Nothing it is then.”

Chapter 7: Is This What Pain Feels Like?

Notes:

y'all ready for angst? no? too bad

---

Doing nothing really meant lazing about, eating junk food, playing video games, and talking about general bullshit. All of which was spaced out by the occasional make out session. Not that Lance was complaining.

In fact it was probably the most fun he’d had so far. Of course he’d had a good time all the other days, but now he wasn’t filled with the anxiety over the fact that he was crushing on a friend that was probably only going to find his feelings awkward or uncomfortable. That fear kind of just goes away when you have that friend sitting on the kitchen counter and you’re standing between their legs and they have their hands on your cheeks holding you close as you kiss them in your kitchen; it’s kind of hard to feel awkward at that.

Naturally though, Lance couldn’t entirely avoid his insecure and worrisome tendencies forever. While he and Keith watched movies and ate leftovers lazily on the couch with their legs entangled, he couldn’t help but think about what Hunk had said to him earlier that morning about how casual usually isn’t his go–to. And he was right. Lance had never really had a casual fling with anyone. He was wasn’t the random hook up type. Not that he didn’t want to be; he wished he could just hook up with someone and then that would be the end of it, no feelings involved, no one getting hurt, just a good time.

But this didn’t feel like a casual hook up. Not with the way that Keith wrapped his arms around him from behind while he made them food. Not when Keith kissed him so softly with a longing that Lance could taste on his lips. Not as they laid on Lance’s bed, holding each other closely in their arms, whispering quietly in the haze of the summer afternoon. This didn’t feel casual or unimportant or anything but real and special.

Lance could barely tear his eyes away from the small half smile that pulled at Keith’s lips while he spoke. He didn’t bother controlling the urge to kiss him whenever he’d feel it bubbling inside him. And he wasn’t about to pull away from Keith’s grasp, not when his fingers just settled in rubbing the spot behind his ear that felt like heaven.

Lance felt supremely happy, and he wasn’t about to let some silly doubt and a niggle of insecurity ruin that.

---

Except, he might.

Maybe because he couldn’t leave well enough alone. Maybe because he really wasn’t sure what Keith was thinking. Maybe because he just like to sabotage his own happiness. But Lance couldn’t not talk about it.

He lasted so long. Lance made it through that morning without bringing it up to Keith. He managed to get through making pancakes together for breakfast, sitting Keith on the counter and kissing him until their food burnt. He got through watching movies and running out to the corner store for snacks and coming back and curling up around each other and half watching TV while they shared gentle kisses. He even got through listening to Keith FaceTime his dads, watching him casually but excitedly describe what they'd been doing all day (with a few important omissions). Lance held it in for so long.

But now, sometime after midnight, once his family had come and gone to bed leaving them alone, Lance couldn’t pretend it wasn’t on his mind any longer. He had to ask, he had to know what Keith was thinking. Lance needed know if he was the only one who was struggling with this cluster of emotions. He felt like he was wading into the deep end of the pool and he needed to know if Keith was there waiting for him or if he was still only foot deep on the shallow side. Because Lance currently felt waist deep and he was afraid of taking another step before he knew and possibly drowned.

“Hey Keith?” Lance said, getting his attention.

They sat on the swings on the swingset in Lance’s backyard. The garage and large oak tree with its wide branches and flat leaves, blocked them from view from the house. Not that they could be seen anyway. The only lights illuminating them were the clouded moon in the sky above them, and the strobing glow of the fireflies that flew around the yard.

Keith turned his head to Lance, and Lance almost lost his nerve under the weight of his gaze. “Do you think maybe we could talk now?” he asked.

Keith sighed.

They’d spent the day talking about everything but what this meant. This thing between them. The unnamed, ambiguous, vague thing between them. And it was driving Lance insane.

He couldn’t stop thinking about it. He couldn’t stop wondering if his feelings for Keith were stronger than Keith’s feelings for him. Or if Keith even actually had any feelings for him. Or perhaps Keith did just consider this something casual, and he’d go back to Texas and they’d pretend nothing happened or changed. Lance couldn’t stop thinking about how every time he brought it up to Keith, he’d change the subject or blow him off. The stress of not knowing was eating him up.

“Lance,” Keith began with a heavy breath, “look, I know you want to talk about this but…” he sighed again, “can’t we just leave well enough alone? We don’t need to talk about it, we’re having a good time, we’re happy. Let’s not ruin it by dissecting it and slapping a label on it.”

Words had never cut Lance so deep. He actually felt himself shrink away from Keith slightly. “But I need to talk about it,” Lance pressed feeling hurt. “Keith, I can’t do casual, it’s just not in my nature. I need to talk about what this means, for me, for us.”

Keith paused briefly, looking at him then quickly away. “There’s not going to be an us once I leave,” Keith said quietly.

Lance was taken aback. “What do you mean?” he asked thickly.

“Lance,” Keith sighed, “you didn’t even know you liked me until I got here. How do you know that you’ll feel the same way once I’m gone?”

“Because I will,” Lance said pleadingly.

“Yeah, but you don’t know,” Keith said shaking his head. “And I like you too much to try to find out. Because if the answer is that later you realize you don’t actually have these genuine feelings for me or this was some sort of experiment, and we're already in some sort of… relationship, it’s gonna hurt. I’m just trying to protect myself.”

“Keith, I would never try to hurt you,” Lance said, feeling the thick wetness gathering at the back of his throat— the telltale signs that he was on the verge of crying. “You’re my friend. You’re one of my best friends. And I like you, a lot.”

Keith’s eyes searched Lance’s face. “I want to believe you—”

“Then do.”

“I just don’t,” Keith said frustratedly. “Call it trust issues or whatever you want, but I’m not… I can’t, Lance. I just can’t.”

“Is it me?” he asked. Keith stayed silent. “Is it because you’re the first guy I’ve liked? Is that why you think I’ll change my mind?”

“...partly, yeah,” Keith admitted quietly.

“Keith I don’t care that you’re a guy,” Lance shook his head. “When we first started talking, you were a just a person on the other side of the screen. It didn’t matter if you were a guy or a girl or both or nothing or something completely different. And I developed feelings for that person. The person I talked to everyday. And who made jokes with me and laughed. Who opened up to me and told me about their life and I told them mine. I like that person. That person happens to be you, a boy.”

Keith was silent for a long time. He seemed to be processing what Lance said. Lance however, was waiting impatiently for Keith to respond. He just needed Keith to understand that his fears about talking about them, didn’t need to be fears at all. He just needed Keith to see how serious he was about this. He just needed Keith.

Something seemed to change in Keith’s face. He looked up at Lance with a mixed expression of apprehension and hope as his hands gripped the chains of the swing tightly. “I’m always going to a little afraid that you don’t like me as much as I like you.”

Lance smiled softly. “Then I’ll just have to tell you everyday.”

“I’ll always be kinda scared that since I’m so far away you’ll get bored of me.”

“I haven’t gotten bored of you yet,” Lance smiled.  

“I’m not good at expressing my feelings that well,” Keith said. “You’re gonna get frustrated with me.”

“I’m already always frustrated with you,” Lance joked. Keith frowned slightly, but it quickly curled up into a half smile. “Keith, I promise to always be patient with you if you promise to try to be upfront about your feelings with me.”

“Ok,” Keith nodded. “I’ll try.”

Lance smiled softly at him. Reaching forward, he took Keith’s hand and stood up from the swing. “Come on, let’s go to bed.” Still looking up at him apprehensively, Keith got up from his swing and followed Lance through the backyard and into the house, holding onto his hand the entire time.

Being that it was really late at night, Lance led them quietly through the dark, silent house and up to his bedroom. The air mattress that had gone ignored for the past day was still leaning against the wall looking a bit deflated now. Lance made a mental note to put it away in the morning, but if they only had a few days left, there was no way Lance wasn’t going to be at Keith’s side for as long as he could.

Silently, they changed out of their clothes and pulled on loose sleeping shirts. Even in the dim light of the orange streetlights filtering into his bedroom, Lance could see the hesitation that was still painted on Keith’s face as he set his phone to charge on his dresser across the room. Wordlessly, Lance walked over to him and placed his hands on his hips, and rested his chin on Keith’s shoulder.

Keith lifted his hand up and ran his fingers gently through Lance’s hair. Lance could feel his chest rise and fall with each breath. He tilted his face to press against the skin on his neck and he could feel Keith’s pulse beat against his lips. Lance held him there for a moment, breathing in the warmth of Keith against him, trying to commit the feeling to memory.

After a moment Keith pulled away, twisting in place to face Lance. They both looked at each other, neither of them speaking as they closed the gap between them with their lips. Their kiss was soft, delicate even, with undertones of trepidation. Neither of them knew what this meant for them in the future or how they were going to feel in the light of day.

As Lance kissed him, he could only think about how they’d agreed to try out a relationship. That the person he was kissing was his boyfriend. Even thinking that word sent goosebumps down his arms.

“Let’s lay down,” Keith whispered against his lips, pulling Lance from his thoughts.

“Ok,” Lance nodded, following Keith in a daze across the room. He crawled under the covers with him, curling up close to Keith's side and tucking himself in against him. He felt Keith wrap his arms around him and hold him securely. “Hey Keith?” he whispered after a few moments.

“Yeah?” Keith said quietly.

“Just so we’re on the same page here, before when you said you’d try,” Lance began, tilting his head up against Keith’s chest to look up at his face. “You meant you’d try as in you’d try to be in a relationship with me right? Like— like in a “we’re boyfriends” kind of way, right?”

Keith’s mouth turned up slightly at the corner. “Yeah Lance, that’s what I meant.”

“Oh ok good,” Lance nodded, settling back comfortably. “That’s what I thought too but I wasn’t sure.” He let out a contented sigh and wrapped his arms around Keith’s waist.

“I’ve never had a boyfriend before,” Keith admitted nervously after a few quiet minutes. “I’m not exactly sure what to do.”

Lance looked up at him again. He could see that Keith was genuinely nervous. “Me neither,” Lance shrugged.

“But you’ve dated people before,” Keith frowned. “I haven’t. I’m not sure how things… work.”

“Well,” Lance said scooting up on the bed to be at more eye level with Keith. “For starters we should be honest with each other, you know like tell one another what and how we’re feeling about things. Like for example, I’m really nervous about this,” he gestured between them and watched Keith’s face drop marginally, “but I know I’m also really happy when I’m with you or even just talking to you over the phone, and you make me feel better about myself. And I think that’s important.” He saw the happiness form back on Keith’s face. “Now you try.”

“Uh,” Keith swallowed. He looked away into space, trying to find the words to say somewhere on the far wall of Lance’s room. “I like who I am when I’m with you,” Keith finally settled on. His eyes met Lance’s. Lance could feel his heart start beating quickly and he had an urge to kiss him, and keep kissing him. “I don’t think I’m… um… easy to get along with. I don’t have very many friends. But I’m different with you. I’m better.”

His words had pulled at his heart and in that moment Lance knew he wasn’t alone in the deep end of the pool.

Chapter 8: *pool related joke*

Notes:

it's almost over!

update: theres now artwork!!!!

---

“So have you guys banged yet?”

Lance spit out his cereal, spraying milk on the screen of his phone. The FaceTime screen of Pidge’s smug face was now covered in little spots of milk. Lance was lucky that Keith was still in the shower, otherwise he'd probably would have been even more embarrassed.

“Um, no,” Lance said wiping the screen of with a napkin.

“Really?” Pidge asked. “You guys are sleeping in the same bed every night and you haven't tried to—”

“The concept is self control, Pidge,” Lance said tightly. “I happen to have some. Maybe you should get some for how you speak.”

“Damn sorrrrrry,” Pidge sighed. “I just thought you'd want to get some in before he had to go.” He could only see her face but he could tell by the way her hair moved she shrugged at him. She only really did that when she thought she was right.

“Well,” Lance spun his spoon idly around his cereal bowl. “It's not like I don't want to. It's just, I don't know, maybe this isn't the right time.” He looked up at Pidge expecting an incredulous face but he only saw he watching him expectantly. “I don't want… you know… I don't want us to just do it because he's leaving. It… it should be more special than that.”

“Aw Lance,” Pidge said. “That's really unexpectedly sweet.”

“Shut up,” Lance flushed, feeling slightly embarrassed.

“No seriously that's really nice,” Pidge said. “Look at you, all soft and emotional and gay.”

“Shut up,” Lance said again, blushing even harder. “I'm not gay, I'm probably bisexual.”

“Whatever you are, I'm glad to have you here on the LGBT side of things and free of the big bad cishet world out there,” she said happily.

“Thanks,” Lance said flatly. “I'm happy to be here.”

“Where are you happy to be?” Keith asked walking into the kitchen. His hair was still wet from his shower and it was sort of slicked back by the water, and his red t-shirt clung to him like a sticker. Lance felt even gayer.

“Here in the LGBT community,” Pidge said to Keith as he sat down next to Lance at the small kitchen table. “Good morning fellow member.”

“Morning Pidge,” Keith said, smirking slightly. He pulled his seat close to Lance and slung his arm around the back of his chair around Lance’s shoulders. Lance held the phone far out in front of him so they could both be in the screen, but pushed in close to Keith anyway.

“Aw don’t you two look cute,” Pidge said in a way that could have been genuine and sarcastic at the same time. Lance blushed regardless. “So are we gonna hang out again today? I convinced my dad to clean the pool last week so there’s a sparkling pool in my backyard just begging to be swam in.”

“Oh hell yes, I’m in,” Lance said excitedly. He glanced over at Keith who looked a bit apprehensive. “Unless you don’t want to? That’s ok.”

“No no I wanna go, I just don’t have a swimsuit or anything,” Keith said.

“That’s fine, I have a ton. You can borrow one of mine,” Lane said. “Ok we’ll be there around noon,” he said turning back to Pidge.

“Ok see you, bye,” Pidge said just as she ended the conversation.

Lance locked his phone and set it down on the table, pulling his cereal bowl closer to him to continue eating. It was a few moments before he realized that Keith hadn’t moved from where he was sitting and was looking at him with suspiciously soft expression. “What?” Lance asked around a spoonful of cereal.

“Nothing,” Keith said shaking his head. He continued to look at Lance softly.

Lance took a slow bite of his cereal while keeping eye contact with him. “Is there something you need from me?” he asked, covering his mouth with his hand as hie spoke.

“You told Pidge,” Keith smiled knowingly.

Lance blushed, “well yeah,” he shrugged, trying to play it off as nonchalance instead of the impatient literal bursting he felt needing to tell someone that he and Keith were Officially Together. “She was the one who figured it out that I liked you anyway, so…”

“And she approves?”

“Oh trust me,” Lance said, “you’d know if she didn’t.”

“Good to know,” Keith said getting up from the kitchen table.

“Yeah you have nothing to worry about,” Lance said watching Keith walk over and grab a bowl. “You’re nothing like my last girlfriend, who was… well… mean.”

“I’m a little mean,” Keith said with a smirk, grabbing the milk from the fridge.

“Yeah but you’re like nice mean,” Lance said. “Like the kind of mean that roasts you with a smile. She was like, “I broke all your  XBox games because you didn’t call me last night” kind of mean.”

“Oh yeah you told me about her,” Keith nodded sitting down next to Lance again. He reached over and grabbed the box of Frosted Flakes in front of Lance. “Yeah don’t worry I’m not gonna do that.”

“Well it’d be kinda stretch to do all the way from Texas,” Lance joked. Keith sent him an unamused frown. “Look I gotta make jokes about it, because if I don’t I’ll just be sad all the time.”

He shrugged and continued to make himself a bowl of cereal. “So what did Pidge say? You know, about us? Besides the fact that she approves apparently.”

Lance could hear Pidge’s voice saying So have you guys banged yet? in his head. “Nothing really.” Keith nodded and continued eating. He eyed the line of Keith’s profile and the sharpness of handsome his features. Even damp from the shower and in morning casual clothes of a t-shirt and joggers eating cereal in the most innocuous way, Lance still thought that Keith looked unfairly attractive for 10 in the morning.

“So you said you have a swimsuit for me?” Keith asked, taking another bite of cereal.

“Yeah I have a bunch,” Lance said scooping up that last few flakes into his spoon. “I used to be a lifeguard, and I was on my high school swim team, and I also just love being at the beach. So yeah, I have a ton.” He lifted the bowl to his mouth and started to drink the milk at the bottom

“You were a lifeguard?” Keith asked out of the side of his mouth as he chewed. “That’s kinda hot actually.”

Lance choked—for the second time that morning—spitting milk out, some even coming out of his nose. He frantically tried to wipe his face but it was too late, Keith had his head thrown back in laughter at the sight of his face covered in milk.

“Why’d you spit?” Keith laughed.

“Well because you surprised me,” Lance mumbled, wiping his face and some of the table.

“Why because I said you being a lifeguard was hot? It is,” Keith said nonchalantly, taking another spoonful of cereal.

“I know but like,” Lance searched for the right words, “you… said… I was hot… out loud…”

Keith narrowed his eyes at Lance in confusion. “Didn’t we agree last night to be boyfriends and whatnot? Why is me saying you’re hot so surprising?”

“Because…” Lance couldn’t think of anything else to say, but his heart was still racing from what Keith said. “Shut up,” he said giving Keith a light shove.

“Did you forget that I like you too?” Keith said smirking knowingly.

“No…” Lance said defensively. “I mean… ok I knew that you liked me obviously but it sort of… didn’t cross my mind that you found me attractive. Like physically.”

“You’re an idiot,” Keith said with no bite.

“But I’m your idiot,” Lance teased poking Keith’s cheek.

---

“So…” Lance began, looking between his two best friends. The three of them were sitting on the patio table in Pidge’s backyard, all of them still damp from being in the pool. They had gotten out of the pool earlier to eat and now they were all just talking before they went back to swimming. But when Keith excused himself to go to the bathroom, Lance saw it as an opportunity to finally talk to both of his friends alone.

“So…” Hunk repeated, exchanging a look with Pidge.

“Look I know you both have like, a million things to say. Let’s just get it out now,” Lance said waving them forward.

There was a brief pause before they both spoke in unison.

“I knew it! I called it! I know I said this before but I just fucking knew it . There was no way that you didn’t have a massive crush on him. He’s so your type. And you were so in denial and now look, 4 days and 1 boyfriend later, who was right? Me —”

“Why’d you tell Pidge before me! You walked in here holding hands and I wasn’t supposed to react!? Plus I have so many questions! Like do your parents know? Do his parents know? What happens when he leaves? Are you guys officially together together—”

“OK stop,” Lance said stopping both their rants at once. “I meant one at a time.” They both shrugged. “And to answer you: No our parents don’t know yet but I’m gonna tell them later. I’m not sure what’s gonna happen when he leaves but we’re definitely officially together together and that’s not gonna change. And Pidge what the hell do you mean by ‘ he’s so my type’ ?”

“I mean that he’s like so your type,” Pidge said, not really clarifying anything. Lance looked at her to continue. “Ok, like he has the whole dark, moody, broody thing going for him.”

“What— he’s not dark, moody, broody?” Lance said incredulously. “Sure he’s snarky, but he’s like all giggles and softness. ”

“If hearing you say that didn’t want to make me vomit it’d be adorable,” Pidge said with a fake adoration.

“What Pidge is trying to say,” Hunk gave her a quelling look, “is that we’re very happy for you and Keith is very nice and we’re glad you’re happy.”

“Thanks Hunk,” Lance smiled. “I am happy.”

“Well until he goes back to The Lone Star state,” Pidge added.

“Why do you open your mouth and just ruin things?” Lance asked. “I already said that we’re staying together. It’s just gonna, you know, suck for a little bit.”

“What’s gonna suck for a little bit?” Keith asked walking through the sliding doors that lead out into Pidge's backyard. Much dryer than the rest of them though also still in just swim trunks (which were a red and white pair that Lance lent him), Keith walked over and sat next to Lance at the table.

He flashed Keith a quick smile as he sat closer. “Nothing,” Lance shook his head, not wanting to bring up the whole “Keith was leaving soon” thing to him again. He placed his arm around Keith's back. He skin was cooler from walking through the air conditioned house and it was nice against Lance's sun warmed arm.

“I was just mentioning that this next year is our junior year, which means we're gonna spend the second half of the year coming up with a thesis,” Pidge covered up remarkably believably.

“I thought you do a thesis in senior year?” Keith asked, successfully convinced.

“Well our program wants us to have the full year to work on it so you start in your Junior year,” Hunk added. “You'd be surprised how complex an open ended computer science thesis prompt could be.” Keith smiled and shrugged.

“What are you studying?” Pidge asked.

Lance watched an emotion flicker on Keith's face—but it was gone before he could identify it. “I'm not in college,” he said nonchalantly.

“Oh, ok cool,” Pidge said. “Sorry, I didn't mean to—”

“No it's ok,”Keith said quickly. “I mean I did go, at first. But it just wasn't for me. I dropped out and now I work full time on my dads’ ranch.” Lance rubbed his back comfortingly, and Keith glanced at him and sent him a thankful look. “I look after our animals and I fix all the equipment, and I get to have time to build motorcycles. I'm like a mechanic that also rides horses and feeds chickens.”

“Man sometimes I wish I could drop out and work on a ranch,” Hunk sighed.

“Honestly it was the best decision I made,” Keith said. “Going from my small town high school where I was the valedictorian, to a huge university in Austin to study aerospace engineering— it made me realize I just really didn't fit into the collegiate world of real academia.”

Hunk and Pidge gaped at him.

“Um hold on a second here, backtrack,” Hunk said blinking at him in shock. “Did you say you were the valedictorian? And you were studying aero engineering?”

“....yeah?” Keith said glancing at Lance.

“That's really impressive,” Pidge said equally taken aback. Lance shook his head; leave it to his friends to be more impressed with academic credentials. “Do you, I don’t know, miss it?”

“Um, I guess,” Keith shrugged. “Sometimes. Sometimes I miss the feeling of completing a pile of homework or being the first one done with a test or being in class early before the professor.”

“Mmm I’m digging this soft college ASMR,” Pidge smirked.

“But honestly, I’m happier now than I was at school,” Keith said. “Maybe I’ll go back one day. Maybe not. Who knows.”

“You don't have to,” Lance said tucking a strand of hair behind Keith's ear. “College isn't everyone's path. Sometimes people's lives just aren't meant to go that way.”

“Says the guy who's already planning his grad school applications,” Pidge said out of the side of her mouth to Hunk.

“Well that's just what I'm doing, but Keith doesn't have to do that,” Lance said settling his arm around Keith a bit more securely. “But Keith doesn't have to do that.” He looked coolly between his friends but they didn't say anything.

There was a significant pause. “That being said, I can't wait to be done with school,” Pidge said. “And I for one,” she stood up, pushing her chair back behind her, “i'm gonna enjoy not being in school right now, and go do a cannonball into the pool.” With that, she quickly walked around the table, and at a slight run, jumped into the pool creating a fairly large splash for her size.

Hunk glanced at the ripples at the surface of the pool, and then back at Lance and Keith who has twisted around to watch Pidge. “I guess…last one in has to clean up?” Lance and Keith scrambled out of their seats and into the pool before Hunk could even get around the table.

---

Three pitchers of ice tea, two more rounds of burgers and fries, and one very long game of friendship testing Marco–Polo later, and the sun was setting behind the back fence of the yard. Pidge had gotten cold sometime ago and had retired to one of the lounge chairs with a book that looked bigger than her head. Hunk, who had lost the race back to the pool, was cleaning up the patio table. Keith and Lance however, were still lazily swimming in the pool.

Lance had a the edge of a floating lounge tucked under her arms and was resting his chin on his folded forearms, while Keith laid on top, floating wherever Lance pushed him. Despite having his eyes closed and an arm thrown over his face covering his eyes, he was awake and listening to Lance talk softly at him from the water below.

“Comfy?” Lance asked, drawing shapes with his wet fingertip on Keith's now dry thigh.

“Very yeah,” Keith smirked, not moving his arm from his face. “I don't even wanna get down from here to get out of the pool.”

“Don't worry, I'll swim you over to the edge so you don't have to get your pretty legs all wet again,” Lance smiled.

“Pretty?” Keith said lifting his arm slightly and peering out at Lance from under his forearm.

“Well you called me hot earlier right?” Lance said. “I'm only returning the compliment.” Keith accepted it with a shrug. “Besides, you better get used to me complimenting you all the time. Because this is gonna happen. All the time.” He grinned up at Keith, and Keith looked down at him from behind his arm. “All. The. Time.”

“What kind of compliments are we talking here?” Keith asked.

“Oh every kind,” Lance said, adjusting himself to leaned up higher on the floaty. He pressed a small kiss to the top of Keith's thigh. “I mean obviously the basic compliments on how amazing you are, and how beautiful you are, and how incredible you are. You know, the basics.”

“Mhm, of course,” Keith said lightly.

Lance reached over and traced Keith's fingers on the hand that was resting on his stomach. “But also more special ones on how you are one of the smartest people I know, and how you're really kind and the fact that you have a freaking six pack like oh my god kill me,” he added with an exaggerated moan. He could see Keith blush from underneath his forearm.

“You're ridiculous,” Keith grinned, lifting his arm up and looking down at Lance. “You're lucky you're cute,” he said putting his arm back over his eyes.

Lance could feel a flood of emotions fill his gut. Hearing Keith said stuff like that to him so easily made him feel like he could die right there. He didn't think there'd be a time where he's ever be used to it. “Lucky I'm cute huh?”

“Mhm,” Keith hummed.

“Does that mean I'm cute enough to get away with things?” Lance asked as conspicuously as possible. It wasn't enough to evade suspicion.

“Lance what are you—” but before Keith could finish his question, Lance had overturned the floating chair and toppled Keith into the pool with a loud kerplunk.

Keith broke up from the surface, blinking water out of his eyes and pushing his hair back. He inelegantly pushed the chair out of the way and he clumsily waded towards Lance, who was swiftly moving backwards laughing. “Lance— you fucking— get over here so I can dunk you under the water!”

“You're too slow—” Lance teased, easily moving through the water as Keith struggled to catch up with him.

“Stand still so I can splash you at least,” Keith said, skimming his arm across the surface of the water and sending a small rush of water towards Lance.

“Oh you think I'm afraid to get splashed?” Lance laughed as the water hit him. “I was born for the water, baby. I'm fucking Aquaman.” He moved closer and splashed Keith with a bigger wave of water.

“You're about as much Aquaman as you are Aquamarine,” Keith laughed back as Lance's splash hit him. He moved his arm across the surface and pushed a wave of water towards Lance, coming close enough that he could feel Lance's legs brushing his under the water.

“Hey it would be a fucking honor to be Aquamarine,” Lance said, foregoing splashing Keith again for grabbing his arm and pulling him in close. Taking advantage of Keith's lack of finesse in the water, he put his hands on Keith's waist and held him up a bit so they were almost chest to chest. He could feel the smooth lining of the pool as he leaned his back against it. “If I'm Aquamarine, would that make you my Raymond?” Lance said softly, his eyes dipping down to Keith's lips that were just so close to his own.

Keith's thought process seemed to be very similar because his eyes also fell to Lance's lips. “I never actually saw the movie,” he breathed. They both inched closer.

“He's the love interest guy,” Lance whispered, half tuning out his own voice in favor of staring mesmerized at Keith's pouty lips that looked like they were begging to be kissed.

“Then I guess so,” Keith exhaled as he closed the distance between them.

He kissed Lance with slow, pulling motions that were in no hurry to go any further. Lance let himself be taken over by the waves of Keith's mouth, crashing and ebbing over him with full control. Lance let Keith take control, making himself pliable in his hands. He felt Keith's fingers walk up his back, digging into his slick skin, looking for purchase on his shoulder blades.

Kissing Keith was so new, so exciting. He discovered new things every time him kissed him. Like how Keith nibbled at his bottom lip before soothing it over with his tongue. That Keith was particularly weak to having his lip pulled between Lance's. And how he'd let out small imperceptible moans each time Lance pulled them closer. It was like watching his favorite movie and always seeing something he hadn't caught before.

Lance could do this forever.

“Hey watch it! No fornicating in the pool!” Pidge called out behind them. “My parents are almost home and I don't want to have to explain why Lance is sucking some guy's dick in our pool.”

They broke apart with a small chuckle. Keith rested his forehead in the crook of Lance's neck, his mouth catching a few water droplets that had lingered on his skin. “Sorry Pidge!” Lance apologized, feeling too happy and light headed to actually be sorry. He could feel Keith giggle against him and in that moment he didn't care who saw them together.

Chapter 9: Goodbyes Suck

Notes:

and it's over!!!! thank you for everyone who read this!!!!

---

The following 24 hours went by far too quickly.

The next day Lance and Keith packed a cooler of water, grabbed a picnic blanket, and piled back into Lance’s Ford Fiesta and took off towards Long Island. Lance had told Keith that he hadn’t even shown Keith the beach, and that being from somewhere so landlocked he had to see this island’s beach at least once.

They did the 2 hour drive to Montauk in about 3 and a half hours, stopping along the way to eat and sight see a bit. Though most of the drive was taken up by Lance discovering that Keith knew a good portion of the words to Les Mis due to a high school production he’d been a stagehand for, and then performing the majority of the songs as they drove down the Long Island Expressway. Lance was pleasantly surprised by how well Keith could sing and Lance couldn’t help but show off how amazing he was.

By the time they’d reached the sand and brick beach town on the very end of Long Island, it was already in the early afternoon. Lance brought Keith up to the lighthouse first, taking him up to the gallery to look over out onto the atlantic ocean. There was something so peaceful and fulfilling by looking at the way the sea breeze rustled through Keith’s hair, and how the sun glinting off the water illuminated him in a warm, active sunlight. Lance found himself staring more at Keith than at the view. He convinced himself that it was because he could drive out to Montauk and view this anytime, but Keith was leaving.

He tried not to think about it. Lance pushed it out of his mind as they pulled off their shoes and carried their blanket and cooler onto the beach. He ignored it as he and Keith laid out the blanket and lounged out on top, eating food they’d bought in town and fending off seagulls for their lunch. And he most definitely refused to even remember it as the afternoon wore on and they left their picnic area to shed their clothes and run into the water in their swim trunks. Lance just didn’t want to think about it.

And as they walked hand in hand back to Lance’s car as it began to become early evening, Lance tried to forget that this was the last night he was going to have with Keith—until god’s knows when. That the next day they were going to get back into his car but he was going to have to drive Keith to the airport and watch him leave, unsure when he was going to see him next. Lance didn’t want to sour their great day with the melancholy mood he’d been in, but it was hard not to picture saying goodbye to Keith when he knew he’d run out of days to plan for them.

Once they had gotten back to Lance’s house, only about 2 hours later, they joined Lance’ family for Keith’s farewell meal. Lance’s father had cooked Lance’s favorites—congri y bistec con maduros—in an effort to expose Keith to as many of his comfort foods as possible before he left. Though Lance hadn’t asked his father to make that, he felt touched that his dad knew to make something that would make Lance feel like he was sharing a piece of himself with Keith. Even if he wasn’t aware of their new relationship status, it was a meaningful gesture; one that made Lance very happy to see.

Lance was happy that he could see his family and Keith getting along so well. Over the course of the week he’d seen Keith grow more comfortable around his family even to the point where he was able to hold his own in several games of dominos against Lance’s dad and brother. And yet, while he was very touched to see his boyfriend interact so seamlessly with his family, there was a part of him that wanted to take Keith back up to his room and horde him here until he had to leave.

He was beyond upset that Keith had to get on a plane and fly hundreds of miles away from him, even though he’d been forcing himself not to think about it all day. And once it was time for everyone to go back to their rooms and go to bed, Lance realized that hoarding Keith away in his room didn’t make him feel any better.

As he curled up to him, using Keith’s chest as a pillow and wrapping his long arms around his torso, Lance made himself think about anything other than this would be the last night like this for the near future. That in 24 hours time Keith would be in Texas, and he’s have to go to bed alone. He was surprised at how quickly he’d gotten accustomed to sleeping next to someone every night, and he wondered if Keith would miss it too— but he was too afraid to ask.

He was afraid that if he mentioned how much he was going to miss him, Keith would change his mind and say the emotional pain just isn’t worth it. Or if he commented that this was their last night together, Keith would find it… disappointing. Or even that if Lance said anything about the depth of his feelings that Keith would become uncomfortable and regretful of him. And Lance didn’t want to jeopardize anything.

So instead, Lance laid down with Keith, occasionally pressing kisses to his chest, feeling the weight of Keith’s hands on his back. He intertwined their legs together, folding them together until he could see where he ended and Keith began. He wanted to remember them like this, so close and together.

---

When Lance woke up on Saturday morning, he had almost completely forgotten for a moment that it was the day that Keith was leaving. He felt sedated and warm curled against Keith, the heaviness of sleep still weighing down his limbs. The mid morning light filtered into his room through the blinds on his window, painting long light streaks across the foot of the bed.

But then the thought occurred to Lance that this was the last night in a long time that he was going to wake up next to Keith. And he wanted something to remember this moment.

Lance stirred in place, trying to shift but not wake up Keith who was laying down still asleep next to him. Gingerly he moved up to leaned on his elbow and reached over Keith to grab his phone on the edge of his desk. He carefully grabbed it in his hands and gently laid back down, taking care not to wake Keith.

Making sure his phone was on silent, Lance opened up the camera application and positioned the camera to take a picture of Keith asleep next to him. He took several in quick succession, getting images of Keith asleep in his bed, doing his best to take them without waking him. But by the last image, he saw Keith’s eyes start to flutter open and Lance quickly locked the phone and put it on the bed next to him.

“Were—were you taking a picture of me?” Keith asked sleepily, rubbing his eyes.

“Well, I mean… yeah I was,” Lance admitted sheepishly. Keith looked at him tiredly but not angrily. “You just looked so cute and I wanted to remember you here, like this, so I thought… you know… but if it bothers you I’ll delete them I swear.”

“No it’s ok,” Keith sighed, curling in closer to Lance. “I get you. I took some pictures of you at the lighthouse yesterday, so I get it.”

“Wait really?” Lance asked, tilting his head down to look at Keith better. Keith hummed against him. “That’s really sweet, Keith.” Keith hummed against him again, wrapping his arms more securely around Lance’s chest. “Are you done with talking this morning?” Lance smiled.

“M’tired,” Keith mumbled, pressing his face into Lance’s neck. “It’s early.”

“Actually it’s about 9 in the morning,” Lance corrected with a small smile, loosely running his fingertips up and down Keith’s back, his fingers catching on the fabric of his t-shirt.  

“Shit is it really?” Keith asked, lifting his head to look up at Lance. Lance nodded with a note of resignation. They both knew they only had a few hours left together, though that went unsaid.

“Did you have a good time this week? You know, in general,” Lance asked softly.

Keith gave him a gentle half smile. “Yeah, I did.” He leaned in and closed the gap between them, giving Lance a brief kiss. “I’m really glad I came.”

Lance could feel emotion gathering in his throat. “I’m glad you came here too,” Lance said thickly. His eyes swept over Keith’s face and he debated saying out loud what he was thinking. But, as usual, the words came out before Lance could even think about it. “Did you want to have sex with me?”

Surprise was the best way to describe the look on Keith’s face. That and whiplash, from the hard change on topics. His mouth opened and closed before he was able to stutter out a response. “I–I mean, did—did you want to?”

Despite being the one who brought it up, Lance had no prepared answer to that question. “Well I don’t not want to…” He could that his response didn’t clear up any confusion. “I guess I do… but also…” Keith stared at him in anticipation. “I’m not sure if… you know… we should.”

“Ok,” Keith nodded after a moment.

“Because like,” Lance sighed and turned his head up to look at the ceiling while he spoke his thoughts aloud, “I want to, you know, do it and whatever. Like I really do” He glanced down at Keith in his bed, “ I really do. ” He turned back to look up at the ceiling again. “But also like I feel like if we do, you know, have sex, we’d just be doing it because we’re gonna be seperated for a while. And I don’t know if that’s why we should… like… do it.”

There was a long pause. And in that time Lance was too nervous to look at Keith and he just sat in anxious silence as his words floated in the air between them.

“I agree,” Keith said after a long moment. Lance turned to look at him. He was looking just as bit of nervous as Lance was. “Just because I’m leaving isn’t a good enough reason. It should be—”

“—special,” Lance finished for him, with an agreeing nod.

“Yeah,” Keith exhaled.

“Is that dumb?” Lance asked self consciously. “Wanting it to mean something? Is that dumb? Or outdated? Or ridiculous?”

“No,” Keith shook his head. “Of course not. Sex isn’t the same for everyone. Some people don’t imbue it with any deeper meaning, and others don’t separate emotion from it. No one’s wrong, it’s just their choice.”

“And how do you see it?” Lance asked nervously.

Keith paused for a moment, looking away. “I… I think it could mean something. If it was with someone who meant something to me.” He looked up at Lance, as if telling him that Lance could be that person. “Have… have you ever… you know… before?”

Lance swallowed. “Um… with my ex girlfriend, yeah,” Lance nodded.

“And?” Keith asked expectantly.

“...And I think I don’t want to rush into that again,” Lance said after a moment. He could feel his heartbeating really fast in his chest. “Is that ok with you?”

“Of course,” Keith said earnestly. “Whatever you’re more comfortable with. Lance, I never wanna make you feel like you have to do anything you don’t want to do. If you’re uncomfortable with something, or you’re not ready to do something, that’s ok. We can wait. Or if you never want to do it, then that’s ok too. I don’t want you to feel that I have any expectations— I don’t.”

Feeling overwhelmed, Lance took a few seconds to gather himself. He could feel the thickness in his throat and the burning sensation behind his eyes. “Why are you so amazing?” Lance thought aloud in a whisper.

“I’m not trying to be,” Keith said. “This is just basic stuff, you know? Being considerate, communicating, being honest. I’m trying to be more upfront with my feelings like you asked.”

Lance brought up his hand to cup Keith’s cheek softly. “Thank you,” he whispered. Keith gave him a small smile in return. “You should have some expectations of me though. I don’t want you to feel like you can’t ask things of me. I wanna be as thoughtful and considerate of you as you are of me.”

“You already are though,” Keith said quietly. Lance couldn’t hold back any longer. He closed the gap and kissed him. And he kissed him, and he kept on kissing him until his heart stopped beating uncontrollably in his chest and he could feel himself relax in Keith’s arms.

---

 

“Keith are you all packed up? Did you need anything for your flight?” Lance's mom asked when they came down stairs a little while later. She stood with her back to them talking over her shoulder as she washed dishes in the sink.

“I'm all packed,” Keith nodded. “I don't need anything, but thank you.” He and Lance were sitting at the kitchen table eating the pile of scrambled eggs Lance's dad just made them both.

“You sure? Not even like some snacks? I'll run to Target and get you something if you want,” she offered.

“Thank you, but I think I'll be ok. It's only about a four hour flight,” Keith said.

“Four hours? Nombre no, I'm gonna run to target real quick and get you some protein bars or something. What flavors do you like?” She said turning off the faucet and wiping her hands.

“Mom,” Lance said out of the side of his mouth as he chewed. “It's ok you don't have to—”

“Leandro, please. Let me mom him for his last few hours here,” his mom said. She looked between Lance who was frowning and Keith who was biting back a smirk. “Fine, I won’t go crazy buying thing.”

“Thank you,” Lance sighed.

“But we have a box of luna bars in the cabinet and you’re taking no less than three ok?” she added, pointing a figure at Keith in a very parental way.

“Ok Mrs. Espinosa,” Keith nodded.

“Good cariño,” she smiled patting his cheek softly. “You're a good kid. You're welcome back anytime.”

“Thank you,” Keith said with a soft smile. Lance watched his mother squeeze Keith's cheek affectionately as she walked out of the kitchen. “I like your mom,” Keith said after a moment once she was gone.

“Good, I'm glad,” Lance smiled.

“I think she's the Espinosa I'm gonna miss the most,” Keith said with a half grin.

A grin formed on Lance's face. “Oh really?”

“Mhm,” Keith grinned in full now, as he took another bite of his food.

“There's no one that you might miss a little bit more?” Lance asked leaning in closer to Keith. “Someone maybe here in this room?” Keith pretended to think really hard. Lance leaned in even closer to his nose and lips were brushing against the side of Keith's face by his ear. “Maybe someone you like a lot, and might even call your boyfriend?”

Keith continued to feign deep contemplation. He then pretended to have an epiphany. “Oh wait do you mean you?” Lance nodded, his nose brushing against the shell of Keith's ear. “Hmm I guess I'll miss you a bit.”

“Just a bit huh?” Lance laughed, slipping his arm around Keith's waist. He took the moment to pull Keith closer and press a series of quick pecks to the side of his face.

“Ok ok— maybe a lot,” Keith said, a giggle bubbling up in his throat; the sound was divine. In that moment Lance wanted nothing more than to make Keith giggle again forever.

“Yeah that's what I thought,” Lance said taking a moment to breath Keith in, enjoying their time together while he still could. He leaned his forehead against the side of Keith's head, brushing his nose against the skin below his ear. “I'm gonna miss you too,” Lance whispered after a moment.

Keith didn't say anything but he didn't have to do. He just turned his head towards Lance so they were face to face. They both glanced at the entrance to the kitchen on the other side of the room and saw it was empty. Both of them came together for a brief but weighted kiss. But they after a couple seconds they both pulled away, content to continue eating, now sitting much closer to each other at the table.

---

The hours leading up to Keith's flight went by much faster than Lance wanted them to. It was like one minute he'd look at his phone and it was say 10am and they have one conversation with his dad and when he checked the time again it said 11:30am. It was maddening. The one day he needed time to feel slow and drag on it felt like it was moving faster than ever.

And things that normally took forever, went by quickly. Deflating the air mattress and reorganizing his room, something that he could normally drag out for an hour, took a few minutes. He wished that had taken him longer to do just so he would be distracted and not had to watch Keith pack up his suitcase and get ready to leave. Because watching Keith pack to leave? Unbearable.

“How about you sell your plane ticket and you tell your dads that you lost it?” Lance suggested. He was sat cross legged on his bed, coming up with different ways Keith could stay trying to convince him not to leave, with little luck.

“The ticket is in my email,” Keith said with an amused smile, as he closed the zipper on the top pocket of his suitcase.

“Ok then tell your dads your email was hacked and you can’t get to the ticket,” Lance said alternatively.

“They also have the email of my ticket,” Keith said with a sad, but still amused sigh. “They can just send a screenshot. All I need in the ticket number.”

“Ugh Keith,” Lance threw himself backwards on the bed, letting out a groan. “Work with me here. I’m trying to find a solution.”

“There’s no solution,” Keith said sadly. “I have to go.” Lance let out another groan. “I know this sucks, and it’s gonna suck a lot, but I do have to go home.”

Lance raised himself up back into a sitting position. “I know,” he sighed. It was too late to not say, he'd already admitted. “I just…I’m gonna miss you is all.”

“Lance,” Keith said affectionately with a shake of his head. He walked over to him, taking Lance’s face in the palms of his hands. Lance let his face be squished and he looked up at Keith with what he hoped were very compelling puppy–dog eyes. “I’m not dying you know, I’m just going to Texas.”

“You might as well be going to China,” Lance mumbled through squished together lips.

“Don’t be so dramatic,” Keith laughed.

“I’m Latino, we’re always dramatic. This is nothing. I’m being calm and rational,” Lance continued through his squished cheeks.

Keith let out a small laugh. “Well, if you’re being calm and rational I need you to understand that this isn’t the end of the world. We’re gonna see each other again. And it’s not like we’re not gonna talk to each other every single day.” He eased up the squish on Lance’s cheeks and let his hands slide down to cup his face gently at his jaw. “Everyday,” he repeated.

“You promise?” Lance said, his eyes searching Keith’s face for even a hint of insincerity.

“Absolutely,” Keith nodded, thumbing Lance’s cheeks tenderly.

Lance couldn’t help but smile up at him. “You’re surprisingly good at this, you know? This whole boyfriend thing.”

“What can I say? I’m a catch,” Keith smirked.

A smile pulled at Lance’s mouth at hearing his words spoken back at him. “How long have you been holding onto that one?”

“Oh I’ve been dying to use since Thursday,” Keith smirked.

“Yeah you’re hilarious,” Lance said sarcastically, but the bite was lost in the beaming grin he was giving Keith.  “I was wondering when you were gonna say that to me.”

“I think I waited an appropriate amount of time,” Keith grinned. “Honestly, you’re just so lucky to be dating me.”

“ Ja ja ja que funny ,” Lance said snarkily. “Yeah yeah, make fun of me.”

“No no, not make fun of,” Keith tisked, shaking his head. His thumbs brushed across his skin again. “I like that you thought that before we were actually, like, dating for real.” He seemed to struggle with what he wanted to say next. “It… it makes me feel like… like you did always want me.” Lance went to speak but he continued. “I know you said that you always did, but that’s just something I’m still trying to get used to. This boyfriend thing is still really new to me.”

A small smile pulled at Lance’s lips the way that Keith’s words pull on his heartstrings. “Me too,” Lance said gently. “But like I said, you’re a natural at this. And also you’re—”
Lance was cut off by an alarm going off on Keith’s phone. They both turned their head to look at the screen on the surface of Lance’s desk. Lit up on the screen was a small text box for the alarm that read “LEAVE FOR AIRPORT”. Those words felt so finite. Neither of them spoke for a long moment.

“I guess we should get going,” Keith said quietly. He took a step back and moved his hands from Lance’s face. Even Lance could tell that Keith was upset about leaving, even though he had been putting up a brave front.

“Yeah, ok,” Lance agreed softly, standing up from his bed. “Let’s um, let’s bring your bags down and load them into my car.”

Almost silently they loaded Keith's things into the trunk of Lance's car. The motions felt distant and slow, like moving in a dream. And when they went back inside one final time so Keith could say goodbye to Lance family, it all felt very surreal. Lance watched each of his family members hug Keith and wish him a good flight and it just wasn't sinking in that Keith was really leaving. In his head he knew that Keith was but it felt like he'd just got here. They were just starting to figure out what being together meant. They were just beginning to get into a groove in their kissing. Things were just beginning to click with them. How could Keith be leaving when things were just starting to get good?

“Lance?” Keith said, putting his hand on Lance's on the steering wheel. “You ok?” Lance hadn't even seen realized that he'd gotten in the car and was just sitting in the driveway with the car on.

“Yeah I'm ok,” Lance said putting the car in drive and moving it forward. “I was just thinking is all.”

The drive to the airport was unfairly short. Lance had been expecting some of that notorious New York City traffic, but the roads were clear. Even the highway exit leading up to the airport was unusually empty. Lance couldn't believe that even also the roads within the airport were moving quickly. And by the time he pulled up in the Terminal B departing flights drop off, he had not had enough time to mentally prepare himself on the ride over.

He put the car in park completely on autopilot. He unbuckled and got out of the car by sheer muscle memory. And he popped the trunk and started taking out Keith’s suitcase and bag without even thinking about it. All of his movements weren’t being controlled by his mind, he was just moving because he had to, not because he was thinking about it. Because if he thought about it, he probably would have never gotten out of the car.

“Thanks,” Keith said pulling up the handle on his suitcase and moving it up on the curb.

“No problem,” Lance said as he closed the trunk. He hadn’t even realized how drained he felt until he had to exert real effort to slam the trunk shut. He walked over to Keith on the sidewalk, who was adjusting his laptop bag to fit across his chest. “Hey,” Lance said reaching out with his hands and placing them on either side of Keith’s waist. “Have a good flight.”

“Thanks,” Keith nodded. He lifted his arms to rest on Lance’s shoulders, his wrists overlapping behind his neck.

“I suppose you’re right,” Lance sighed. “This isn’t really goodbye.”

“It’s not,” Keith shook his head.

Lance sighed again, his eyes darting across Keith’s face trying to memorize exactly what it felt like to be this close to him. “Text me as soon as you’re on the plane. And as soon as you land. And when you get home. And—”

“Lance,” Keith cut him off with a soft look of amused exasperation.

“Ok… fine, just…” he trailed off, looking at Keith’s face. Keith was watching him with a soft expression that made Lance feel both simultaneously smitten and ridiculous at the same time. “I’ll miss you,” he added in a quieter voice, glancing down and away from Keith’s gaze.

“I know,” Keith nodded. “I will too.”

The buzz of the bustling airport seemed to be drowned out by the silence of everything they weren’t saying. But in that moment none of that really mattered. Because this wasn't goodbye, not really.

“We shouldn't have a long drawn out dramatic airport scene,” Lance said lightly.

“I thought you were Latino and dramatic,” Keith joked.

“That's true,” Lance nodded. “But also we shouldn't be that cliche airport couple. You know what I'm talking about the running and the crying and the kissing—”

“So no kissing?” Keith asked slyly.

Lance considered him for a moment. “You know what, no. No kissing,” Lance said sticking his chin in the air. “We did a ton of that before. Let's just say… um…”

Keith thought for a moment. “How about “see you later”?” Keith suggested. “That way it's not goodbye, but just like, you know, I'll see you later.”

“Yeah ok,” Lance smiled. He leaned in and rested his forehead against Keith’s, pulling Keith as close to himself as he could in the very public airport drop off. “I’ll see you later,” he whispered, nudging his nose along Keith’s.

“See you later,” Keith breathed back, moving his hands to gently cup Lance’s cheeks.

They stood there for a long moment, neither of them knew how long. Long enough to hear angry honks coming from cars that were coming up behind Lance’s idling car looking for a space to pull up.

Slowly, they dropped their hands, forcing themselves apart. Lance knew that it was pointless at this point to drag out the inevitable and he made himself take a step back and stick his hands in his pockets. He watched Keith take the handle of his suitcase in his hands, and with a small wave to him, turn and walk away into the airport through the sliding doors.

It was like a weight gathered in Lance’s chest as he saw the doors shut behind Keith. The part of him that still felt like he was imagining the whole thing was still in a bit of denial that Keith was really walking away from him, towards the plane that was going to take him far, far away from here. But Lance ignored that part of him, turned around, and got back into his car.

---

 

But Lance only got about 10 feet down away when it dawned on him how ridiculous he was being?

Let’s not kiss, was he insane!? He was going to let his first ever boyfriend and one of his best friends get on a plane to go hundreds of miles away without a dramatic airport kiss scene? How could he even do that to himself? It was all just too cruel.

Lance swerved to the right, narrowly missing an SUV that had come up on his blind side and pulled up along the curb of the drop off sidewalk. Without thinking, he threw his car into park, pulled out the keys from the ignition, and ran out of the car, barely remembering to click the lock button in his haste to get to the sliding doors.

He went through them at a rapid walk, entering into the busy area of flight check in’s and baggage checks. Lance looked back and forth, scanning the crowd for Keith. Not seeing him, he took off at a run down the direction he guessed Keith might had walked down.

“Keith!” Lance yelled, cupping his hands over his mouth to be heard over the din of the airport. He looked right and left as he came to a brisk jog, weaving in and out of the carts of baggage and weary travelers and parents consoling crying children. He was just about to give up when—

“Lance!”

He whipped his head around and saw, standing at the end of a very long TSA line, Keith was looking at him. Not waiting another moment, Lance started his half run—half doge through the airport obstacle course to get to Keith. At the end of the line, Keith had abandoned his suitcase and bag on the floor and had also taken off at a run towards Lance.

They met in the middle with a crash, almost knocking into a sunglasses hut kiosk as they grabbed one another and brought their lips with a brutal force. Lance wrapped his arms around the back of Keith, holding him tight against him as he kissed him within an inch of his life. In turn, he let himself be grabbed and pulled and held tight against Keith, who was kissing back with as much if not more force and passion as Lance was. The both of them were lost in each other for a few blissful, amazingly cliche moments before they broke apart with a gasp,  still holding close to each other.

“New Year's,” Lance gasped, brushing Keith’s hair out of his face with his thumb. “I’m coming for New Year’s. It’s only six months, but I’m coming.”

“You better,” Keith breathed just before he brought their mouths together again.

Lance let himself be kissed, savoring this feeling but enjoying the knowledge that there was a reunion date planned. It suddenly felt a lot better now knowing when he was going to see Keith again. He pulled back with a breathy gasp. “You better get back on line,” he said quietly.

“I will, just… just give me a second,” Keith exhaled slowly. He slowly ran his hands down from Lance’s cheeks to his neck and back up to his jaw. “I can’t believe you were gonna let me leave without kissing me.”

“Well, like I said. I’m latino, I gotta be dramatic,” Lance laughed softly. Keith smiled and pressed a brief to his lips. “Ok, I gotta go before I get a ticket, or towed—I might already be.” Keith laughed lightly. “But I just couldn’t let you leave without… without this.”

“Thank you,” Keith breathed. “See you later?”

Lance couldn’t even hold back a smile if he wanted to. “Yeah, see you later.”

Notes:

Austin in January is pretty cool :)

Series this work belongs to:

• Part 1 of Online Relationship