Chapter Text
“Oh, and Trixie?” Maggie, Trixie’s sister stopped her as Trixie was trying to end the phone call, “Mom told me about your girlfriend. She’s more than welcome to come. Seriously, I know you, and I know you’re worried about it, but I’d really like if she came. All the other bridesmaids will bring their partners, and no one will blink an eye at her.”
“Oh! Uh, I mean, she’s probably, um, busy?” Trixie stuttered, heart in her throat. Maggie knew about the girlfriend too? How many people had her mother told? This was getting out of hand.
“Trix, please,” Maggie whined, “I want you to feel comfortable around me and Ryan. Part of that is bringing your girlfriend to the wedding. It would mean a lot to me, and everyone else, to see you happy. You deserve to be happy.”
“I’ll ask her,” Trixie sighed, “But seriously, I’m in the parking lot. I gotta go.”
“Okay, I’m taking that as a yes and adding her to the seating chart!” Maggie made kissy noises into the phone before hanging up.
“Fuck.” Trixie let her head fall to the steering wheel.
~
“I’m screwed, I’m screwed, I’m screwed,” Trixie chanted while washing her hands in the sink next to Kim, her best work friend.
“What’s wrong?”
“My sister wants me to bring my girlfriend to her wedding,” Trixie groaned. She slipped the black apron around her waist, rummaging through the pockets to make sure her tools were there.
“What girlfriend? What? Have you been hiding something from me?” Kim stepped towards her, her big ballooning skirt pushing into Trixie’s space.
“I haven’t been hiding anything from you,” Trixie began, taking a deep breath, “But I may have lied to my mother about having a girlfriend and apparently now my whole family thinks I’m in a serious relationship.” Kim’s jaw dropped, but her lips twisted into a smile.
“What kind of romcom juice have you been sipping?” Kim laughed, “When has it ever worked out well for the LA lesbian to lie to her conservative mother in the midwest about a fake woman?”
“Okay, I definitely haven’t seen that movie.” Trixie shoved her aside and walked towards the main floor of the shop.
“So what are you going to do? Craiglist a date? Tell them she died?” Kim was still trailing after her, despite having passed her station.
“I don’t know, Kim!” Trixie barely restrained herself from snapping, “Can we just work for a second while I think about this?” Kim’s narrow eyes went even more narrow.
“You are not getting off the hook with this. I’ll see you at lunch.” She turned and marched back to her station. Trixie sighed and snapped the lights on at her station before checking the ipad on the stand for her first appointment. She didn’t have anyone for another half hour, so she snuck her phone from the pocket of her apron and pulled up her messages
Trixie: Mother, I’m pushing my friends away againnn.
Katya: I’m still here, Barbara.
What’s going on?
Trixie: I snapped at Kim because she kept asking me questions.
Also, this might be the worst day of my life.
So, if I finally bite the bullet, make sure Kim does my makeup for the funeral.
You’re not allowed to pick out my dress but please help yourself to my wardrobe after I’m gone. Lord knows you need it.
Katya: What’s wrong mama? I’m booked all day, but we can go to ice cream tonight if you want.
Trixie: It’s literally the world’s longest story.
Ice cream does sound good though.
Eight?
Katya: See you then. And remember, Jesus doesn’t exist and his love for you wouldn’t brighten your day anyway.
But I do and I love you.
Trixie: xoxo
Trixie smiled surreptitiously at her phone before pocketing it. Katya never failed to make her laugh. Which was probably one of the reasons she found herself in this predicament. She groaned and threw her body into the chair, waiting for her client.
~
Lunch snuck up on Trixie, and before she realized, Kim was hovering beside her station with expectant eyes.
“Chipotle?” Trixie suggested, with the grim resignation that she wasn’t going to get out of this conversation. Kim nodded and extended her elbow. Together, they breezed through the doors of their shop, across the shopping center lot, and ordered their food, swapping stories about their clients from the morning.
“Okay, enough distraction, Mattel,” Kim said, mouth full of food.
“Fine,” Trixie groaned, “So I let my mother think that I had a girlfriend, because she was really worried about me being lonely and dying surrounded by cats. But I didn’t start the lie! It just sort of snowballed from assumptions she’d made, and by the time I realized what she was assuming, I couldn’t, like, correct her because she was really happy for me. And she’s never been supportive of my relationships or sexuality and I couldn’t help it! So fine, I’ve let it go on for too long and now my whole family must think I’m dating someone and I am expected to bring her to the wedding in a few weeks, and I’m going to die of embarrassment either way.”
Kim’s burrito was frozen halfway to her mouth. Trixie slurped loudly on her drink, waiting on a reaction. Kim merely laid down her burrito, daintily wiped her hands on a napkin, and extended one across the table to grasp at Trixie’s.
“Your mom will not think you are going to die alone if you tell her you dumped this girl. Or that, like, she can’t get off work.”
“That’s the problem, she knows she’d get off work.” Trixie saw Kim do a double-take as she blurted that out.
“What do you mean? Did you make up a job too?” Kim went back for her burrito, laughing slightly.
“No, she’s,” Trixie paused, “Fuck, Kim. She thinks my girlfriend is Katya.” Trixie was so distraught that she couldn’t even muster a laugh as Kim dropped her burrito onto the table.
“What? Trixie, what?” Kim stared at her incredulously.
“I didn't tell her we were dating!” Trixie practically shouted, “I didn't even realize she thought that until a few months ago! She just like, saw pictures of us and heard me talking about her and just assumed!” Kim burst into hysterical giggles. Trixie reached across the table to slap her on the arm.
“Ow, stop.” Kim’s giggles died down. “So, what now?”
“I guess I either ask Katya to go with me, or say we broke up. Even though the only reason my mom thought we were together was social media, so it probably wouldn’t even work.” Trixie picked through her burrito bowl, spearing the black beans on her fork.
“Trixie, why don’t you just tell them she can’t come?” Kim said slowly, as if trying to speak to a child. Trixie shrugged and continued to poke at her food.
“Do you want her to go?” Kim gasped, “Oh my god you want her to go!”
“Shut up!” Trixie’s face was screwed into a scowl, “Not like that. I just… I want my mom to be happy.” Kim leaned forward to hear the last part, because Trixie was muttering.
“So ask her,” Kim shrugged, “She’d probably rob a bank for you - a trip to Wisconsin can’t be that bad.”
“But that’s so weird! Come be my fake girlfriend and hold my hand in front of my homophobic family even though we are very platonically not dating.”
“Mmm, would we say very platonically though?” Kim teased. Trixie huffed and stood to throw her trash away.
“C’mon, I have a two o’clock, so I need to get back.”
~
Trixie waited at their table of the ice cream shop’s patio that they had gleefully discovered was exactly the same distance from both of their apartments. She had considered ordering Katya’s usual, but knew the girl would more than likely be late. Trixie played around on her phone while she waited, uploading an outfit picture she had taken this morning to Instagram and decidedly ignoring her sister’s text of “Is your gf veg too? Making a final count for dinner :)”
“Hello you gorgeous, angelic, polite and well-adjusted woman,” Katya called, still on the corner of the block. Trixie giggled and tucked her phone into the pocket of her shorts. Katya had on a black scuba skirt and a slinky white collared shirt. Trixie guessed that she had come straight from the art gallery.
“Bad day?” Trixie guessed, as Katya immediately slumped into her arms.
“Why can’t people just be nice?” Katya mumbled into Trixie’s shoulder. “You smell different.” She pulled back to look at her. Trixie watched as the blue eyes darted around her face and hair, which she’d pulled into a side ponytail to get it off her neck on the summer evening.
“New clothes smell,” Trixie grinned, spinning to model her shirt. It was just a simple pale pink crew neck, but the fabric was so soft that Trixie had to get it when she saw it.
“C’mon, I need the processed sugar before we mutually rant about how everyone on this planet sucks except for the two of us,” Katya stated, interlacing her fingers with Trixie’s and pulling her inside.
Trixie insisted on paying for Katya’s (one scoop of birthday cake in a waffle cone coated in chocolate and sprinkles because “It’s always someone’s birthday, Trixie”) and her own (a strawberry milkshake that, no, she didn’t just get because it was pink, thankyouverymuch) orders. They took them to the patio where the sun was still hanging on in the horizon, staining the sky bright orange and light pink.
“You first,” Katya said, cheersing Trixie’s cup to her cone.
“No, I want to hear about your day. My stuff can come after,” Trixie insisted, leaning forward on her elbow to fully immerse herself in the art of Katya’s storytelling.
“It’s nothing really, I’m trying to leave all that stuff at the door, because it doesn’t matter, y’know? Like the only thing that matters when I’m there is my art, but I worry that my people skills at the desk will affect how people perceive my art, so then I sit there anxious all day, and ruin every interaction I have with people, and it is a cycle. But I’m leaving it at the door.” Katya shook her blonde hair wildly, as if freeing the thoughts from the tangles.
Trixie made a sound of compassion, lips tight around her straw. Katya laughed, throwing her head back.
“Whatever, mama. Seriously, I’m a lot happier now that I’m away from that place.” Katya lightly kicked her foot against Trixie’s shin. “So what’s got you so bad that you’re willing away your closet to me?”
Trixie sighed, setting her cup down. She had decided with Kim that she would ask Katya, but now that it was time, she couldn’t calm her racing heart down to get the words out.
“Well, my mom might think that I have a girlfriend, even though I clearly don’t,” Trixie said slowly, eyes glued to the table.
“Uh huh,” Katya encouraged.
“And with Maggie’s wedding, they want me to bring her,” Trixie continued. Katya nodded sagely. “But, uh, she doesn’t…”
“Exist?” Katya finished.
“Exactly.” Trixie looked up cautiously at Katya. She was chasing drips of ice cream around the cone, lapping like a dog, but she was listening intently.
“And um,” Trixie ripped up a napkin in her lap, “I know it’s dumb, but I want to make my mom think I’m happy out here, so I told-”
“Do you want me to come? I could easily get off work,” Katya interrupted, leaning forward, “It’ll be fun! I could meet your family! We could milk cows and pick corn from the thingie and eat it and wear overalls with no shoes!”
“Oh my god,” Trixie laughed, “I’m not that country, thank you very much.”
“Seriously, if it means that much to you,” Katya was suddenly serious, grabbing Trixie’s hand, “I’d go with you.”
“Uh,” Trixie wasn’t sure how to continue, “You would?”
“Of course! Trix, you’re my best friend. I’d do anything for you.” Katya’s thumb was still stroking Trixie’s hand.
“Uh, okay,” Trixie clapped her hands together, successfully dislodging Katya’s from her own, “Well, I’d really appreciate it. It’s not for like, another month.”
“Do you need me to do anything? Change anything on facebook?” Katya asked.
“No, that’d just confuse our friends, please don’t,” Trixie rushed. “I don’t think you need to do anything, except for like, come on that weekend.”
“Deal. I’m buying overalls.” Trixie groaned.
“Trixie, I’m having a crisis. A clothing crisis,” Katya’s voice rang through the speaker. They’d successfully avoided talk of the wedding until just yesterday when Katya had a meltdown at the idea of meeting Trixie’s family.
“Katya, I don’t know what to tell you.” Trixie juggled her phone between the red bull can and her purse strap, digging for her keys. “All of the pictures you sent me were fine. There’s not really time to go shopping. Just bring clothes and wear them.”
“I want to make a good first impression!”
“You know you’re not really my girlfriend and this does not affect our relationship, right?” Trixie dropped her bag on her kitchen table and listened to the other line - silence.
“But they don’t know that!” Katya finally replied. Trixie shot the rest of her red bull back.
“You want me to come over, don’t you?” Her eyes flitted around the apartment to be sure she'd completed her own to do list before she went to help Katya with hers. Bags packed, plants slightly over watered, dishes done, trash taken out - she was good.
“Please mama,” Katya whimpered. Trixie sighed and grabbed her purse off the table again.
“Order pizza, I’ll pick it up on the way.”
~
At Katya’s, there were clothes strewn everywhere. Her suitcase was lying open on the coffee table, and Lana Del Rey was playing loudly from the bedroom. Trixie pushed aside a brightly colored dress on the kitchen table to put the pizza down.
“You’re aware our flight leaves in like twelve hours, right?” Trixie called.
“Crisis!” Katya responded. Trixie laughed and brought a piece of pizza into Katya’s room.
“You don’t have to change anything. Just maybe leave the eyeball necklace behind, and I don’t care what you bring,” Trixie assured.
“You haven’t seen me in nice clothes! What if you hate it? What if your sister doesn’t let me in at the church?” Katya was spiralling, which wasn’t new to Trixie. Trixie held the pizza out to Katya, who began frantically chewing on a bite.
“First of all, it’s not in a church, so we won’t have to worry about you catching fire. Secondly, I’ve seen you in some fucked up outfits, but it’s not that hard to put together a few good ones. I’m here to help, but I need to either focus on your clothes or the crazy, I can't do both.” Katya nodded silently and took a seat on the floor.
Trixie began rooting through the piles Katya had made on her bed.
“Like, realistically, you’re a lesbian artist and yoga instructor, they’re expecting eccentric. It’s fine.” I’m a Barbie girl in a Barbie world echoed in from the kitchen “Christ, would you go get that?”
Katya came back in holding the now silent phone gingerly on her palm. “Your mother called.”
“Why didn’t you answer it?” Katya cut her a panicked look. “Oh my god, you’re meeting her tomorrow.” Trixie snatched the phone and hit redial, going back to her task of folding a dress neatly.
“Hi mom, sorry, Katya was too nervous to answer the phone for me,” Trixie teased, her tongue poking through her teeth slightly. Katya mouthed “what the fuck” at her.
“Hey, I’m going to forward you the email about the hotel, but I wanted to update you,” Trixie’s mom said over the phone, “Maggie is going to pick you up instead. I'll be busy at the house."
“Okay, cool,” Trixie shrugged, “I’ll send her the flight info then.” She held up a strappy red dress to Katya, who immediately shook her head no.
“Why not?” Trixie whispered, over her mother’s story about a dress fitting.
“It’s too slutty!” Katya whispered back.
“I like it when you’re slutty!” Trixie insisted, a bit too loudly.
“Well, Trix, sounds like you’re busy with Katya,” her mother laughed. Katya slapped her hand to her forehead in a way that made Trixie laugh even harder than she was at her mom.
“Yeah, I came over to help her pack,” Trixie explained. Katya snatched the red dress and threw it into the depths of her closet.
“Don’t stay up too late! Robert is planning on barbecuing tomorrow night for a little welcome home party.”
“No worries, I’ll probably head home in half an hour,” Trixie assured, tucking the phone between her shoulder so that she could hold up a skirt and shirt combo to Katya, who nodded.
“Oh, I would have thought you’d be staying there,” Trixie’s mom trailed off. Trixie’s eyebrows raised in alarm. Was her mother insinuating that she'd approve of her sleeping with Katya?
“Nope,” Trixie said awkwardly. Then, pulling the phone away from her mouth, “Where’s that tuxedo looking thing? I like it.”
“Butch realness,” Katya teased, turning towards her closet.
“Alright, well I will see you tomorrow night!” Trixie’s mom chirped, “I’m looking forward to it. I can’t remember the last time we talked this often.”
“Probably when I lived there,” Trixie spat before thinking, “Sorry, I’m looking forward to it too. I gotta go help Katya though. Love you.”
“I love you too, Trixie.” She sighed and tossed the phone on the bed.
“You okay?” Katya asked, offering the shirt she’d asked for.
“Does it make me a bad person if I don’t actually like most of my family?” Trixie gritted her teeth.
“No, that makes you a normal lesbian,” Katya giggled.
"Like, I love my mom, and everyone else I guess. I'm just not used to interacting with them?" Katya made a sympathetic noise and pulled Trixie in for a hug.
“Whatever, it's fine, go find some shoes to go with that navy dress,” Trixie pushed her off, going back to business, ignoring the way her skin tingled where Katya had touched her.
Within 45 minutes, Katya was fully packed, the pizza was gone, and Trixie was yawning.
“Listen, you have to be at my apartment by 9:30 tomorrow,” Trixie reminded her as Katya lightly pushed her to the door.
“I know, mom,” Katya sighed, “I won't be late.”
“And I mean it, don't bring weed in your suitcase. They totally have dogs for that.”
“Okay mom, bye.”
“Bye girlfriend,” Trixie teased, kissing her hand with a smack.