every sign pointed straight to you

by helsinkibaby

Summary:

Three times Tom and Chris talked about marriage, and one time they did more than talk.

The first time that Tom and Chris talk about marriage, it's when the town, and much of the surrounding area, has pretty much married them off already, are getting ready to take bets on when the announcement will be made. They talk briefly about it, but only briefly - both of them know that they're not there yet. They make a decision, that they'll decide to decide when they're ready, not before, and they leave it at that.

Then he goes to Africa and breaks her heart.

*

The second time they talk about marriage is six months after he leaves, the night that he comes back. Or rather the morning after he comes back, when he wakes up with her in his arms, her back pressed to his chest, after a night of very little sleep and he stares down at her and he feels content for the first time in months. Her breathing is deep and even and he knows he should let her sleep and he tries, he really does. But he can't help giving in to the urge to run his fingers through her hair and there's a spot just above her shoulder blade that's just begging to be kissed so that's exactly what he does. If the way her lips curve in a smile, if the way her back arches against him is anything to go by, she's not exactly unhappy to be woken up like that and she turns in his arms, brings her lips to his and he loses himself in her for a little while.

Only for a little while and then her alarm goes off and she's giving him a reluctant smile. "I could call in sick," she says but they both know that's only a pipe dream.

"I'll be here when you get home." It's the kind of thing he might have said six months ago but considering what's gone on between them, there's a deeper meaning there, one that makes her cheeks flush as she looks down.

"What do you want me to say?" she asks, still not looking up. "About you, I mean. Because between Kate and Jerry Hogan, everyone probably knows you're back..."

He leans in and presses his lips to hers. "Tell them I couldn't live without you," he quips and she laughs, even if he wasn't entirely joking. He cups her cheek, runs his thumb up and down. "Tell them I missed my home and I couldn't stay away." Her cheeks darken and she has to swallow hard and he kisses her again and again, rolling her onto her back and covering her body with his.

Things are only starting to get interesting when she's pulling away. "I have to get ready." She sounds as reluctant to move as he is to let her go and she's halfway across the room when he hears his own voice speak, not sure of what he's saying, speaking from the heart.

"When I left," he says, "the whole town had us married off." She stops, freezes, and while he's not averse to the view, he can see the thin line of tension that appears in her shoulders. "I know we said we'd decide in our own time, but-"

She turns and for once it's not the sight of her body that makes him stop. Rather it's the look in her eyes, the way she's biting her lip. "If you'd asked me that six months ago," she tells him, "I would have said yes in a heartbeat."

He swallows against the ache in his heart, the reminder of how much he'd hurt her. "Too much water under the bridge?"

Her smile is small, sad. "I do love you, Tom." She comes back to the bed and he reaches up so she can take his hand. "I always have. But I think we need time to get back to where we were."

"Time." He nods. "That's fair."

She squeezes his hand. "Promise to ask me again some day?"

He brings her knuckles to his lips. "I promise."

*

The third time they talk about marriage is at the Bachelors and Spinsters Ball. Which, on the face of it is somewhat ironic, but when you consider that it's during the last dance, which Vic and Nancy Buckley have been telling people for years they have to look out for, maybe isn't so unusual.

The band are playing something slow, a waltz Tom thinks, and he doesn't think twice before pulling Chris into his arms. She goes willingly, smiles up at him and there's a look in her eyes that's not unlike the one he'd seen earlier tonight when she'd opened her front door to him and seen him in his tux for the first time. "I feel like I've hardly seen you all night," she says and he can't disagree with that. Even if his dance card hadn't been pretty much full all evening, he'd still had politics to play so he'd only caught snatches of her across the room, mostly with Zoe, her foster daughter who looks, in Tom's humble and not at all fatherly opinion, way too grown up for fifteen, in tow.

"And every time I see you, it looks like you've got yourself a shadow." He's teasing her and she knows it too, pursing her lips as she looks across the room. "Young Glen Reid's taken quite a shine to you."

"Don't tell me you're jealous." Chris's lips twitch as she teases him right back.

"Should I be?"

She actually rolls her eyes at that. "About as jealous as I should be of all the women you've been dancing with." It goes without saying that some of those women are quite a bit older than both him and Chris, and while some aren't quite old enough to be his mother, some aren't that far off. It's one of the reasons Tom had never enjoyed this shindig - none of them had wanted to dance with Old Harry Sinclair (the 'old' seemed to be added on to his name, like part of his title) not when the younger doctor was around. This year, though, things had been a little different.

"Not as bad as some years," he tells her. "Having Geoff here really takes the heat off me." The new doctor and his definite single status had been the hot topic of discussion around the punch table but out of the corner of his eye, Tom sees Geoff waltzing Kate around the room and he files that away for future reference.

Chris's lips twitch again. "He'll be thrilled to hear it." Her tone indicates the complete opposite.

"Some of the ladies did mention something." She tilts her head, raises one eyebrow in invitation to continue. "They wondered why I was here at all when I'm not technically a bachelor."

He's not quite sure what reaction to expect; amusement isn't it. "Are you hiding a wife somewhere I don't know about?"

The idea that he could get away with that in Cooper's Crossing should make him want to laugh. Instead, he's very serious when he says, "They're not the first people who have said it either. I heard the old codgers outside the pub the other day agreeing I should have made an honest woman out of you long ago. And Zoe asked me if I thought we'd ever get married... I think she wants to be a bridesmaid."

Chris presses her lips together in a thin line. "I told her not to talk to you about that."

A quip about teenage rebellion crosses his mind but he doesn't give voice to it. Not when they were more important things to discuss. "I suppose it all just got me thinking," he says. "I mean, I know we said we'd decide when the time is right... and we haven't talked about it, not really, but I spend most nights at your place, I'm helping you raise Zoe, for all intents and purposes, we are married..." He's rambling and he knows it and he makes himself stop when he sees a little smile playing around her lips. "What do you think?"

"I think..." Chris considers her words carefully, slides her arm up his back, bringing her hand to rest in between his shoulder blades. "I think that if you wanted to marry me... if you really, truly believed that you were ready and that it was definitely what you wanted, you wouldn't need the dancing biddies, or the old codgers, or Zoe to prompt you to do it. You'd just do it." She lifts one eyebrow, like she's daring him to contradict her. When he doesn't, she smiles. "So, if it's all the same to you, I'd rather wait for then."

A weight he didn't know was there lifts from his shoulders. "It's not because I don't love you-"

"I know that." She sounds equal parts amazed that he'd even think that and amused that he does. "I love you too. And I will marry you, Tom. But when we both want to. Not when we think we should."

Heedless of the people around them, he lifts his hand, runs his knuckles along her cheek. "You are a better woman than I deserve, Chris Randall," he says as he leans in and kisses her. He feels her lips curl into a smile as she kisses him back and then they sway together, doubtless starting a hundred rumours, for the rest of the song.

*

The rumours, as he expects, rise to a crescendo after the Bachelors and Spinsters Ball but when no announcement is forthcoming, the second glances and hushed conversations dry up quickly. Sam and Emma's wedding takes the heat off them quite a bit, and life for Tom and Chris continues on as it always has. They go on clinic runs, they help some patients and lose others. Zoe goes back to the city to live with her father, and somewhere along the way Tom and Chris give up the pretence of having two separate houses and he moves in lock stock and barrel with her. Which gives the Bush Telegraph plenty to discuss, with more than one old biddy tutting, as they both knew they would, about their "living in sin" and the example they're setting for the youth of Cooper's Crossing but neither Tom nor Chris worry about that.

They're happy, just the way things are.

And then Chris gets sick.

At first, Tom's sure they're going to be giving the local galahs something else to chirp about. He quickly realises that's not the case and he just as quickly realises that it's a lot more serious than that. A benign tumour wrapped around the aorta is pretty much the worst case scenario and when it becomes clear that medication isn't going to cut it, that their only option is surgery, the scenario becomes more dire still. He goes to Sydney with her, stays in a hotel while she stays in hospital, undergoing more tests than he can stand and one morning when he's on his way downstairs to head to the hospital, he presses the lift button and when the doors open, he sees a sign.

Actually, he sees a mass of white material taking up much of the area of the lift and when he raises his gaze, he sees a harried looking bride with two even more harried looking bridesmaids pressed into both far corners of the lift. He recognises when he's beaten quickly, steps back and holds up both hands. "I'll get the next one," he says and there are worlds of gratitude in the expressions of each of the women.

When he makes it down to the lobby, he comes across the bridal party again. The bridesmaids are fixing the bride's train, while a woman who looks to be the mother of the bride is berating a man who is sweating bullets. Apparently, he's lost his top hat somewhere between the hotel room and the lobby, but it's when the mother says something about how she hopes he's remembered his speech that the man's face loses all colour and he looks like he's about to collapse on the spot.

Tom's a doctor, but he has places to be and he high tails it before his Hippocratic Oath means he's called into action.

He intends to tell Chris the whole story but when he gets to the hospital, there's another round of bloods being taken and the doctor is coming to talk to her. Later that morning, her father arrives and they have to fill him in on what's been said and decided. At lunch, he leaves the hospital and Chris and Tom try to have a bite to eat before Chris is taken downstairs for yet more tests. There's nothing for Tom to do but wait and he decides to take a walk outside - he can't stay in the room without Chris for long, it feels as if the walls are closing in on him. Which is strange, considering his job and the amount of time he spends in hospitals, but he's learning it's different when you're on the other side of the stethoscope. So, just like usual, he walks to the park nearby, wanders around the paths until he comes near to the bandstand and when he's almost there, he stops in amazement.

Because instead of it being empty like it usually is, it's filled with people, people he knows. Or more particularly recognises as the wedding party from this morning. This time, however, there are no frowns or upset faces. The bride is beaming at her new husband, her mother is wiping tears from her eyes and her father looks fit to burst with pride.

Tom's a man of science, not one given to believing in signs from above.

But suddenly, he thinks he might be changing his mind, in more ways than one.

He turns sharply on his heel, makes his way back to the hospital, but he doesn't go up to Chris's room straight away. He has a stop to make first and, that done, he goes to see Chris, finds her waiting for him.

He bends down and kisses her, sits on the side of the bed with one of her hands in his. Before he can say a word, he narrows her eyes. "Are you ok?"

He smiles, first because she knows him so well. Second because only she could be in a hospital bed and be worried about him. "I'm fine." He tucks a strand of hair back behind her ear and she leans into his touch. "I was just thinking," he says. "How would you feel about getting married?"

She freezes, goes stiff all over. Then she blinks and her eyes rake over his face. "You don't have to say that just because of this operation-" she begins and he shakes his head.

"That's not what this is about."

Chris lifts an eyebrow and she seems almost angry. "Isn't it?"

"No." He squeezes her hand, wraps his other one around their two joined hands. "It's because I finally realised the town, the old codgers, they're all right - I should have married you years ago." He remembers suddenly the Bachelors and Spinsters Ball, when he'd told her about that overheard snippet of conversation, remember how she'd said he'd propose and he has to swallow hard at the proof, once again, of how well she's always known him. "I know, we've talked about it before and we've never been on the same page." She tilts her head and he acknowledges her silent point. "Ok, I've never been ready. Not because I don't love you, not because I don't want to be with you, but there was just always something holding me back. I'd tell myself it wasn't important, that we were married in all the ways that matter, that a piece of paper wasn't going to change anything between us... and then I looked around me today and I realised... I want to be married to you, Chris. We can go back to the Crossing, we can set up practice somewhere else, we can do anything you like... but right now, all I want in this world is to be your husband." He's rambling, he knows, as he tends to do in situations like this, and there's a thin film of tears in her eyes which he hopes means something good. "I spoke to the hospital chaplain before I came up here. He can sort out all the paperwork for us, it'll only take a couple of days, he can perform the ceremony..." He forces himself to stop, squeezes her hands tightly. "So... what do you say, Chris? Will you have me?"

A single tear snakes its way down Chris's cheek and she reaches out with her free hand to cup his cheek. Pulling his face towards hers, she kisses him briefly, softly and when she rests her forehead against his and whispers, "Yes," he's as happy as he's ever felt in his life.

He notifies the chaplain to get the paperwork started and they ring Chris's father, not telling him the details, just asking him to come to the hospital. Tom regrets the choice of words slightly when he sees how worried Bill looks when he arrives, but his face clears when he sees Tom and Chris sitting there hand in hand and when they explain that they want to get married, a huge smile crosses his face. He hugs Chris and kisses her cheek and he shakes Tom's hand, listens to them as they explain how it will happen and then he surprises them with a question of his own.

"What are you doing about rings?"

Tom blinks, not having thought too much about it. Or at all, really. "I'll get them tomorrow," he says. He wonders for an instant if Chris would like to pick her own ring but when he looks at her, she's looking up at him, equally blank faced with surprise. "You can tell me what you'd like-"

"Oh, anything's fine-" Chris begins but she stops when Bill interrupts her.

"Because I rather thought I might be able to help with that." He reaches into the breast pocket of his jacket, pulls out a small, velvet pouch. He pulls the drawstring to open it up and empties the contents out into his hand, shows them to Tom and Chris. It's two rings, one a plain gold wedding band, small enough for a woman's hand, the second obviously an engagement ring, its diamond twinkling under the flourescent hospital lights.

Tom blinks, confused, while Chris inhales sharply. "Those are Mum's rings," she says, and her voice is thick with tears. "Why do you have Mum's rings?"

Bill chuckles, plucks the engagement ring from his palm and holds it up. "Well, I know my daughter. And I did get to know Tom quite well during my stay in Cooper's Crossing. So I figured I'd take a punt that you might get some use out of these." Tom can hardly believe the gesture and Chris isn't bothering to check her tears as Bill continues, "The years I spent with your mother were the happiest of my life... and I feel quite safe in saying that she'd want these rings to bring you the same kind of happiness." He extends the ring towards Tom who sees his hand reaching for it, almost like it belongs to someone else.

Chris's hand trembles as he holds it in his, but the ring slides onto her finger as if it was made for it and when he kisses her, she's crying and smiling at the same time.

The chaplain comes through with the paperwork in a timely manner and, once the hospital staff get wind of what they're planning, the whole community comes together to make it a wedding to remember. The doctors sign off on allowing Chris down to the chapel, so she won't have to have the ceremony in her actual hospital bed. Bill's wedding ring is a little big for Tom so he manages to find one in a local jewellers and, on the same shopping trip, outdoes himself by going into a large department store, finding a saleswoman who, by the time he's turned on the charm he usually reserves for nurses and described what he's looking for and the reasons why, is almost in tears on the shop floor, to say nothing of putty in his hands. She agrees to pick out various white dresses for Chris, brings them to the hospital where Chris can pick one so that she can have an actual wedding dress and Tom won't have seen it beforehand. The lady in the hospital gift shop donates flowers for a bouquet and when the kids that Chris has befriended in the children's ward hear her news, they all insist on attending. Several of the little girls beg their rather bemused parents to bring them in their finest party dresses for the occasion and Tom enlists little Jamie, who's become very close to Chris, to be his best man. The kid looks ten feet tall as he stands beside Tom, rings clutched in his hand, trying to ignore his mother's sniffles from the back of the chapel.

When the day of the ceremony finally dawns, Tom has no nerves, no second thoughts and when Chris walks down the aisle towards him, he doesn't notice how pale her cheeks are, how her knuckles are white on her father's arm. All he can see is the smile on her face and the look in her eyes, how beautiful she is and how lucky he is and he knows that even though they've taken the long way around, they're finally here, and that's the most important thing.

Series this work belongs to:

• Part 10 of Right Beside Me Around Every Turn