Chapter Text
Just before you get started a quick note to get you into the swing of things!
The text below is taken directly from my Poison Arrow story, where I was seriously debating the naughtiness of writing such a story where sweet, innocent Barry is thoroughly molested by that criminal Snart -gasp, shock! 😋😁😂
Captain Cold/Flash
Snart literally could not have taken Barry less seriously at first!
-And yes, double standard, because I wrote Barry/Oliver and the first time they met Oliver said to Barry:
“Do your parents know that you are here?”
And to Felicity:
“FYI, they will card him at the Bar”.
The real problem is Cold is so, well Cold, I worry if an all-out smut-fest between him and sweet innocent adorable Barry might be soooooo bad it actually doesn’t feel so bad it’s good! It just might be bad...
I’m still thinking about it!
Let’s just say I made my decision and I am better for it! 😂😂😂
curiobi
@~.~@
****************
‘Snart? I thought you went back to Earth-X?’
‘What are you doing here? Help me would you? I was tracking some arms dealers suspected of stealing Cisco’s anti-meta tech from the CCPD. Good news is I found them and they haven’t sold the tech yet. Bad news, obviously, is they used the tech against me. So, little help getting out of these cuffs?’
‘Right name, different man-
-I’ll give you a clue. I’m a Snart from a different earth that died the same way and then got brought back because of something or other the legends did’.
‘… Oh, Okay. Well, good to meet you. Which earth are you from? -And seriously, just a little bit of help here!’
‘Sure. And I’m from a Little earth I like to call Earth 1’.
‘Okay -Wait what?’
‘You know what your problem is Barry? You’re too gullible’.
‘Wait Snart? My Snart!’
‘Ohh possessive. Not sure I like it. I belong to no one. Second thought. Since it’s you, -carry on’.
‘But you’re… Ray told me you died. He said you died a hero saving the Team’.
‘I did and it sucked . -But that’s the thing about time travel Barry, all kinds of amazing things can and will happen’.
‘…So you’re a time remnant?’
‘Who knows. Look at it this way. I am the Snart you knew and didn’t love from this earth. The part about being back because of something stupid the legends did is true though. -And before you say anything, there’s no way I’m going back to that team. Been there, done that, died and didn’t even get a lousy T-shirt. So I’ve been keeping my return on the down low as it were. Only a select few know. My sister, possibly some arms dealers, and Mick of course, -but when I finally convinced him I wasn’t that Earth X imposter, Mick convinced himself I was a hallucination instead. The whole thing seemed to be making him even more of an alcoholic. So, I figured I’d give him some time to get used to the idea and while I’m here on my earth, in my time and my city no less, what better thing to do than rob some people blind for old times sake’.
‘You… You’re… I can’t believe you! -Just help me get free Snart!’
‘That’s all you’ve got to say to me? No welcome back from the grave, sorry there wasn’t enough of you left to bury? -And no, I don’t think I will help you get free’.
‘What are you even doing here? Did you have something to do with me being captured? Is that why you won’t help me?’
‘What can I say? When you’re in the crime business it pays to know arms dealers. Difficult to make deals with zippy little crime fighters racing about the place interrupting things. -As for the why I won’t let you go, -come on Scarlet, you can figure that out’.
‘So… you’ve gone back to being evil and you’re going to kill me-
-‘Kill you? Barry-Barry, so dramatic. Why are you like this? Is it because of your childhood?’
‘What?!’
‘I’m not going to kill you Barry. Relax’.
‘Then what are you going to do with me?’
‘So innocent. Anyone else would have figured it out by now, but not you’.
‘I don’t understand. What are you talking about?’
‘You know what’s really sad Barry. I believe you. Well let me make it clearer for you.
‘Wha- what the- What are you-
-‘Doing? That much should be obvious even to a repressed boy scout like you Barry. As for the why, it’s because you’re asking for it’.
‘I wha- what are you even talking about? You know what Snart don’t answer that, just stop this right now and I won’t throw your ass in jail again’.
‘For what exactly?’
‘False imprisonment for a start!’
‘Except, I’m not the one who cuffed you Barry. I just found you this way’.
‘But you said-
-‘Oh don’t get me wrong, I’m not letting you go, well not just yet. You see since my return I’ve decided to have more fun in my life’.
‘What the hell does that have to do with me?’
‘Dear god, There’s naive and then there’s being plain stupid. I just kissed you and you still can’t figure it out?’
‘Yeah I’m not buying it Snart. -I thought the Earth-X version of you was the gay one’.
‘I think your understanding of sexuality, much like your understanding of life in general, could use some educating Barry’.
‘I don’t even know what you mean by that Snart!’
‘Clearly’.
‘What I do know is there are dozens of outstanding Warrants against you Snart! I’m going to see you back in jail for being a criminal in general’.
‘No warrants Scarlet, not anymore. You erased my criminal record -or did you forget about that?’
‘...I had no choice. I was trying to save people’s lives and you-
-‘Took advantage of the situation? What did you expect Barry? And why are you complaining? You wanted to save their lives, their lives were saved, -well except for that one guy I killed, but he owed me money, and that other guy was a jerk and oh yes, -would have gassed us all to death if I hadn’t stopped him. Where’s the gratitude?’
‘Gratitude! You’re the one who sabotaged the power dampeners and let him get his powers back in the first place!’
‘Well, you got me there Barry’.
‘I should never have trusted you or erased your criminal record, it was one of the worst mistakes of my life’.
‘Probably. Now Just for the entertainment value, tell me what other crimes you’re imagining seeing me in jail for?’
‘Er -forcible kissing, -that’s sexual assault or something’.
‘Please, good luck getting that to go over in court when you kissed me back Scarlet’.
‘I didn’t!’
‘You did. -And besides, you were asking for it, I mean just look at you, running around at night all alone dressed head to toe in a red gimp suit that just screams, I’m a delinquent, spank me and put me to bed already’.
‘What!’
‘And here I am with a few hours to kill in between jobs and you, all tied up’.
‘Alright Snart, you’ve had your fun, but you should know, just because my hands are restrained in cuffs I can’t phase out of, doesn’t mean my legs have suddenly stopped working, and I will find a way to use them to kick your ass even while tied up if you don’t stop messing around and help me out of these damn cuffs!’
‘Yeah, I thought you might say that’.
****************
‘What, where am… What’s going on?!’
‘Take it easy there Scarlet. I had to dose you with enough ice to preserve a wooly mammoth. I didn’t have a choice, we were about to be discovered by those very unfriendly, yet very well-resourced arms dealers. I could have left and let them finish you off, instead, I was gracious enough to save your life, and not for the first time I might add’.
‘... Yeah, you’ve saved me more than once. What I can’t figure out is why’.
‘Well why not? It’s amusing watching the hopelessly naïve try to make it through life’.
‘You’re not funny Snart. And what the hell did you shoot me for? And where are we? -It’s freezing in here’.
‘It’s not exactly the Ritz Scarlet, I’ll admit. And the heating does take quite a while to get going if it works at all. Let it go. The cold never bothered me anyway’.
‘I’m sorry did you just… quote a Disney princess?!’
‘She’s strong, independent, doesn’t need a man to fulfil her and blasts anyone asking for it with Ice. Let’s just say I can relate’.
‘I can’t believe this is happening’.
‘Why? My impression was you get knocked out and abducted quite often’.
‘Like I said Snart, not funny. Now wherever or whatever this place is you need to let me go right now, you realise this is kidnapping, don’t you?’
‘What this place is, would be a type of safehouse, located somewhere no one would ever think to look for you. I had to disable the tracking device and god knows what other tech your little friend put in that suit so it stays that way. -And for the record I didn’t kidnap you, I saved your life. Or did you think those arms dealers that captured you were coming back to release you and let you go on your merry way un-murdered?’
‘Fine. You saved me. Thank you-
-‘You’re welcome-
-‘But that doesn’t mean you get to just keep me here against my will. And why are you even doing that? -You know what never mind, whatever you’re up to you won’t get away with it Snart. My friends will-
-‘Let me just stop you before you finish that cliché Barry. And quit being so melodramatic, nothing terrible has happened to you. You’re going to be just fine once the effects of the Ice wears off’.
‘No. Something’s wrong, I don’t feel right. This is different than when you shot me with the cold gun before’.
‘Maybe those big bad arms dealers shot you up with something to slow you down, so they could cuff you and leave you out where just anybody turning up to a secret location for an even more secret anti-meta weapons sale could find you’.
‘No, there wasn’t any knock out gas or needles. They used some kind of anti-speedster tech to trap me, I couldn’t move, then I got hit in the back of the head and the next thing I knew I woke up cuffed and then you turned up’.
‘Maybe they shot you up when you were passed out’.
‘Yeah, that’s possible. Maybe that’s why they just left me there, -because they were testing some anti speedster drug on me’.
‘Maybe. Or maybe I decided to take out a little insurance after I blasted you with the cold gun’.
‘You drugged me?!’
‘I may have used a perfectly harmless substance on you. -But just to keep your superpowered body in check. Something that keeps your mind sharp, but your body less meta and more human. Relax, there’s no long-term damage, and it doesn’t last. You just won’t have your full powers for a little while. Don’t look at me like that Scarlet, I didn’t have a choice. I can’t have you speeding me off to jail for crimes I didn’t commit now, can I’.
‘Oh please, what crimes haven’t you committed Snart! -Just this evening we have, failing to help at the scene of a crime, sexual harassment, assault with a dangerous weapon, drugging, kidnapping, and now you’ve added false imprisonment! You’re in big trouble Snart!’
‘Oh please. Barry. I know you work for the police, but could you try not talking like an old cop out of a movie. -And point of order, I had nothing to do with your original capture, at worse I’m an accessory after the fact, and you’re not being held against your will. Notice you’re not in handcuffs anymore. You can leave at any time. Granted, it will be a lot slower than you’re used to, but hey, that is what the bus is for, right?’
‘You know what Snart, if you let me go, right now, I will do you a favour and not even take your ass straight to jail… as soon as I get my powers back’.
‘Like I said you’re not a prisoner. And by the time you get your powers back I will be long gone. You’re a boy scout Barry, you can’t help yourself from marching me off to jail. That’s why I had to make sure you couldn’t’.
‘Well good job, I can barely move! My teeth are chattering, I’m freezing. I think your damn cold gun damaged the suit, it’s not warming me up and without my powers, I can’t vibrate and warm myself up, and with my fingers frozen stiff I can’t get out of this freezing cold suit… You have to help me’.
‘I’m sorry, are you asking me to undress you? Aren’t you going to start screaming sexual harassment if I lay a hand on you?’
‘Snart. I would not be in this mess if you hadn’t shot me in the first place, so the least you can do is help me out of my suit before I freeze to death!’
‘And what if while I’m helping you out of your suit I want to kiss you again?’
‘… I thought you just did that to mess with me, um… are you saying you actually want to kiss me again?’
‘Yes’.
‘Snart-
-‘You know, I think I’m done being called Snart. That guy died. Call me Cold, or better yet Leo’.
‘Why?’
‘I heard the other me called himself Leo and I kind of like it’.
‘But that’s just going to be confusing Snart’.
‘Hey, he came here and tried to steal all Mick’s memories of me and replace them with his special brand of touchy-feely bull crap, I’m just stealing something from him in return. It’s only fair. He’s back with his Earth-X atomic boyfriend and I’m back and using the name, especially since it’s my name in the first place’.
‘…Okay. Whatever, not important I guess. -Now would you just help me?’
‘What’s in it for me Barry?’
‘Are you serious?!’
‘When it comes to making deals, always’.
‘Damn it Snar- Leo, I can barely talk my teeth are chattering so hard, just help me’.
‘Like I said. What’s in it for me?’
‘Oh my God. -What do you want?’
‘What do you think I want Barry?’
‘I don’t know …but I’m not sure I like the way this is heading’.
‘Oh Barry, I guarantee you will’.
‘Wha- no! I’m not going to let you … do anything to me. If that’s the price, then just let me die’.
‘Barry-Barry always so melodramatic. Look at you clinging to your virtue like a damsel in distress when all you have to do is agree to my price and I’ll come over there and help you’.
‘No. I don’t want to pay your price whatever it is’.
‘You know what it is’.
‘…I’m gu-guessing it involves mo- more than ju-just touching me to help me get my fre-freezing suit off’.
‘Barry. You can barely talk because you’re shaking so hard and FYI you’re starting to turn blue. You really need to start making a smart decision. One thing you learn in crime, it never does to overplay your hand’.
‘Wha- what’s tha-that supposed to mean?... Ne- nevermind. If I sa-say yes, what-
-‘Will I do to you? Let’s be clear. If you say yes to me I’m going to do whatever the hell I want to you’.