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One Day At A Time

Summary:

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After naming their new baby boy Klaus and Dave happily drove back to the mansion where their family was waiting to meet him. As soon as the couple got out of the car and got their baby out of the carseat they were bombarded by the Hargreeves siblings, Claire, Grace, and Pogo. And all it took Klaus was one look at his family and one look at his husband and son before he looked up with teary eyes and a smile and said,

"Welcome to the family Five Hargreeves-Katz."

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In a house full of Hargreeves everything is bound to be chaotic, messy, and crazy 24/7.

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a look into the lives in the Hargreeves household

Notes:

send requests for oneshots!!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: how he got his name.

Summary:

request.
can you do a oneshot for why Five's name is Five even though he isn't the fifth one this time.

Notes:

requests are open.

also kinda short...I tried so I hope this fits what you wanted:))

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

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When Five was born an arrangement had already been made. Since Fives birth mother was only 16 and wasn't ready, Dave and Klaus, newly married, decided they would adopt and raise him as their own. So they were there for the birth. Two things came out from being there; one, a newborn baby boy, two, new knowledge that birth was horrifying and probably painful.

The boy was perfect. He had porcelain white skin with a touch of tan. His eyes, when open, were almost like the earth. They had a emerald green center that faded into a bright ocean blue. And, God, his long eyelashes rested perfectly on his face. The boy had almost a full head of chocolatey brown waves. The baby had this perfect smile and whenever you'd see it your heart would melt. The boy was perfect. But there was one problem.

He didn't have a name yet.

Since the Dave and Klaus were there for the birth and had adopted him it was up to them to choose the name. Oh goody. Knowing Klaus he'd probably choose something wild, knowing Dave he'd probably choose something fancy. They'd have to find a way to meet at a middle ground.

"How about Lucas?" Dave asked.

"Or Mikey?" Klaus suggested.

"Maybe Nicholas?" Another suggestion.

"What about Cole or Wyatt?" And another.

"It could be William?" Another.

"Umm Mikah?" This was hard.

"Sebastian?"

"Noah?"

"Oliver?"

"Alexander?"

"Maybe Cameron?" Why was picking a name so difficult?

"What about Ethan?" Not right.

"Or Blake?" It just doesn't fit.

"Dante?" For our baby?

And then Klaus had a brilliant idea.

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Back when Klaus was in the academy he had five siblings; Luther, Diego, Allison, Ben, and Vanya. All of them were adopted by a billionaire who just wished to experiment on them and make them a superhero team. He didn't give them actual names until they turned 10. So before that they were just numbers 1, 2, 3, 4, 6, and 7. There was never a 5. Nor were there any numbers higher than 7.

That's just how it always was.

Of course the siblings had their theories about why there was no 5 but most of them thought that they just disappeared. Or maybe they died. Who knows? They had no memory of them.

When Klaus was just 5 years old he knew he was different from his brothers. He like to play dress up with Allison's skirts and makeup. He liked to gossip with his sisters and talk about boys. Klaus didn't like girls the way his brothers did. When Klaus was just 5 years old he knew he was gay.

5 siblings. Klaus Hargreeves had 5 loving siblings. Luther had always been his dancing partner whenever Klaus wanted to feel like the princesses at the ball that he'd seen in Cinderella. Diego always played Klaus' silly games whether it be fairytale castles or cops and robbers. Allison never failed at having fashion shows and doing makeovers with Klaus. Ben, no matter what, always sat with him after he'd have a nightmare and couldn't sleep alone. Vanya always helped him learn new things. Cooking, violin, reading, German, you name it Vanya would help him with it.

Klaus' had always tried to picture what 5 would look like, what they'd be like. In fact 5 became his first two imaginary friends. The first 5 had been a blonde girl with hazel eyes, the second 5 a brunette boy with aqua eyes. He'd been rather attached to them both. After all they did help out with his nights at the mausoleum.

Dave and Klaus had been dating for 4 years. Every single year, month, week, day, hour, minute, and second had been absolutely perfect but nothing could ever top the fifth year. In their fifth year of dating they had finally got engaged and married and now they were adopting a child.

Klaus will never forget the significance of 5 in his life. He may not have had a 5 as a sibling and that may have left a hole in his heart, but 5 sure as hell filled that hole through his years.

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After naming their new baby boy Klaus and Dave happily drove back to the mansion where their family was waiting to meet him. As soon as the couple got out of the car and got their baby out of the carseat they were bombarded by the Hargreeves siblings, Claire, Grace, and Pogo. And all it took Klaus was one look at his family and one look at his husband and son before he looked up with teary eyes and a smile and said,

"Welcome to the family Five Hargreeves-Katz."

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Notes:

requests are open.

Chapter 2: first kiss.

Summary:

request.
-I WANNA SEE HOW THEY REACT WHEN FIVE GETS HIS FIRST KISS FROM A GUY. AND LIKE HE'S 13 AND SHIT AND HE CAN'T STOP THINKING ABOUT LMAO AND HE'S ALL EMBARRASSED AHAHAHAHA-

Notes:

requests are open.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

-time skip 8 years to when Five is 13-

-----the Hargreeves household-----

It was a nice Saturday night and the Hargreeves and Hargreeves-Katz decided they were going out for dinner. So Allison, Diego, Klaus, Ben, and Vanya were deciding where to eat. Five, smartly, decided to ait this argument out.

"Let's go to Chick-Fil-A, their fries are to diiiiiiee for." Klaus drawled out dramatically. He was always one for being overdramatic.

"God no, Klaus. We're going somewhere nice tonight as a treat for being accident free for almost 3 weeks now." Allison said with all the proudness of a mother.

"How about Chili's?" Diego asked.

"I just want some Taco Bell." Vanya said in a bored tone.

"No, Griddys!" Klaus practically shouted.

"That's not even a restaurant!" Diego shouted back."

"Yeah, well neither is Taco Bell." Klaus said, sending Vanya a look.

"I want sushi." Ben stated quietly.

"Ew, gross Benny that's raw fish." Klaus said while sticking his tongue out.

"Shut up you three, we're going somewhere fancy." Allison said in frustration.

While the siblings continued to argue about where to go and who got to decide, they didn't notice little Five quietly texting his friend Grayson with a full out blush on his cheeks.

Five always said Grayson was just a friend but he was a lot more than that. He was Five's first crush and honestly Five had it hard. He loved everything about Grayson, from his curly, golden brown locks to his bright, loving smile. But Grayson was his best friend since the first grade and he wasn't sure that he even liked boys. Even though Five had always wanted to go out with him, he always got too nervous and flustered to.

Grayson had just sent him a picture of himself with his braces newly off, and Five couldn't help but think of how much he liked him and thought he was cute. The longer he looked, the more he blushed.

And that's when Dave walked downstairs.

"What is everyone arguing about this time, Pumpkin?" He asked his son.

"They're trying to decide where we should go to eat." He replied, still distracted by the picture on his phone.

"Well do you have an idea on where to e- Five are you blushing?" Dave cut himself off as he looked at his son. 'Awwww' he thought, 'that's adorable'.

Five stopped looking at the picture of Mace and turned to his dad and replied, "What? Me? Blushing? Dad, no, of course not! Why would I be blushing? Which I'm not!"

"What on your phone is so amusing? Let me have a look." Dave said as he gently grabbed the phone from Five. He looked and saw a picture of a boy, a boy he knew as one of Five's friends. Dave began to connect the dots, 'my little boy has got his first crush' he thought fondly. He then sent a text to the boy saying he was welcome to come to dinner with him and the family. Grayson texted back a quick 'yea I'll be there :))' and the Dave handed Five his phone back.

Five screamed.

"DAD WHAT HAVE YOU DONE? OH MY GOD! WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS? THIS IS BETRAYAL!" Five screeched accusingly after reading the text his dad sent, his face now beat red with a fierce blush. He definitely inherited Klaus' dramatic ways.

All the arguing came to a screeching halt. Everyone in the room turned to stare at Dave and Five on the couch. It might seem nosey but with what just happened they couldn't help watching.

Klaus, of course, walked over to his son and husband to see what had caused that mini tantrum.

"Five you know it's not nice to tell at your father," he looked down at his son and saw his mad blush and shameful look in his eyes, "what's wrong Peach?"

"Dad invited someone to come to dinner with us." Five said quietly, staring at his shoes as if they were the most interesting thing in the world.

The Hargreeves siblings all looked at each other with a confused look; was that really what made Five freak out? Wanting to know more they just continued watching. Again, they're super nosey.

"Look, Five, if I knew it was going to make you this upset I wouldn't have done it." Dave said.

"I'm not upset," he paused for a moment, debating on whether he wanted to say it out loud or not, "I just don't want to embarrass myself or be embarrassed in front of him, I really like him" Five admitted to his dads, adding the last 4 words quietly.

"Five, you won't embarrass yourself and besides it's already been done, he's coming, you'll have a great time, I'll get to meet your crush, and everything will be perfect!" Klaus said happily, internally screaming. I mean it's his sons first crush and he thinks it's super cute.

"Aww! What's their name?" Allison exclaimed, loving every second of this.

"Who is it?" Vanya asked, slightly amused by the blush growing on her nephews face.

"Fives got a crush!" Diego teased.

"Oooooo!" Ben, of course, decided on teasing too.

"Ugh Daddy make them stop!" Five all but begged Klaus.

"I would buuuut I want to know too." He replied with a huge grin.

Five sighed, "It's Grayson."

There was a chorus of 'awww' as soon as he said it. Five blushed even more.

"Ok, I've decided on a restaurant." Allison declared.

"Oh God." Diego sighed dramatically. When did everyone get so dramatic?

"Finally, this better be good." Klaus said, which ended up getting him a nudge on the shoulder from Dave and a stern look that clearly meant 'be nice'.

"That's great!" Vanya and Ben said in unison.

"Where are we going?" Five asked curiously. He was confused after all the arguing.

"We're going to that world cuisine restrant that's in town. I think it's called Risqué." Allison replied, seeming pleased with herself. "Now everyone go get dressed. Nicely."

And with that Ben, Diego, Vanya, and Allison went off to their rooms to get ready, leaving the Hargreeves-Katz still in the living room.

"Ok, Peach, go hop in the shower and I'll lay you out an outfit. And you too babe." Dave said. God knows there is no way Klaus could chose a nice outfit on his own. And Five is known for wearing hoodies and joggers accompanied with tennis shoes so he needed the help too. Just not as much as Klaus.

-----the restaurant-----

Once they arrived they all tumbled out of the van, Klaus doing so quite literally. Always a dramatic entrance with this guy. They waited outside for a few minutes until a car pulled up and dropped Grayson off. And Fives jaw hit the floor and, damn it, the blush was back.

"Hey Five!" Grayson exclaimed as he walked over.

"H-hi Grayson, it's, um, it's good to see you." Five said looking every bit as flustered as he felt and Klaus inwardly 'awwwws'. Damn you feelings!

"Well why don't we head on inside? Is that alright boys?" Dave asked patiently.

"Yeah, of course. But firstcoukd I talk to you two in private for a second? If it's not a bother." Grayson asked Dave and Klaus, God this kid was polite.

"Sure! You guys head on in and get us a booth." Dave replied.

Five simply nodded and let himself be lead inside by Ben as the rest of the Hargreeves followed. On the way in Ben might've teased Five about his crush and Five might've gave him a wet willy. Might've.

"Ok, so I just wanted you to know that I really like Five, like I like like him. A lot. And I just wanted your permission to ask him out?" Grayson rushed out, a slight blush on his face.

"Well as Five's most amazing father I do declare that you, Grayson, have my royal permission to ask him out." Klaus declared with a kingly bow.

"What that means is yes, you have our permission." Dave translated.

Grayson smiled, "Thank you!" and then happily bounded into the restaurant to join the Hargreeves. Dave and Klaus following behind him hand in hand grinning.

Once inside they quickly got seated. Vanya, Ben, Diego, and Allison with Five, Grayson, Dave, and Klaus on the other. Now things were bound to get crazy soon enough with this arrangement. Actually it didn't even matter where they sat, chaos was bound to happen.

And it did.

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Somehow they ended up arguing about avengers.

"Captain America is way better than Thor!" Ben stated.

"That's the dumbest thing you've ever said." Diego retorted, rolling his eyes.

"Shut up dingus." Ben said with mock hurt.

"What the heck are you guys even arguing for? Bucky is the best!" Klaus budged in.

"He's not even an avenger!" "He's a sidekick." Ben and Diego said at the same time.

"Well Iron Man is obviously the strongest!" Vanya said joining the argument again.

"Excuse me but Natasha is the best avenger." Allison argued. Now that earned a few eye rolls.

"No offense, but Spiderman is the best." And there was Dave's polite argument.

"You're all wrong," Five began, "Captain Marvel is obviously the strongest and the best. She can do basically everything!" He concluded, a smug smile on his face as his aunts, uncles, and dads all looked inclined to agree.

"You're family is so fun." Grayson whispered to Five with a smile.

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In the middle of some other random argument Grayson grabbed Fives hand under the table and maneuvered it until they were holding hands.

Five hand a full blown blush for the rest of dinner. Thankfully nobody questioned why.

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It was nearing the end of the night and they had just begun to leave. When they reached the parking lot the all stopped and waited for Graysons parents to pick him up, so they had some time to kill.

Grayson walked over to Five and grabbed his hand again. "Five I was wondering if maybe you'd like to go see a movie sometime? Just you and me. Like a date." he asked.

"Wha- y-yeah of course." Five stuttered out. Inside he was internally screaming and his heart was full of love.

Grayson smiled. And as soon as he did his parent pulled up.

"Welp I have to go now, tonight was lovely. Bye guys, bye Five." as soon as he said the he pulled Five in for a kiss.

On.
The.
Lips.

Five of course kissed him back and he was happy he did. The kiss was soft and it was as if time stopped. After it was over Grayson hopped in his car and they drove off.

That left Five standing there red faced, jaw dropped, and over all just flustered. And the Hargreeves found the whole situation overall adorable and amazing.

"Awwww Five! You just has your first kiss! That was so fucking cute!" Klaus cooed excitedly.

"Language." There goes Dave.

"Oooooo Five's got a boyfriend!" Allison teased.

"Five and Grayson sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" Diego and Ben sang together.

"That was young love at its finest." Vanya stated with a smile.

And that's pretty much what happened the whole ride home but Five was too busy sitting there with a goofy smile on his face and thinking of Grayson to even notice.

Tonight was definitely a success.

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Notes:

requests are open.

Chapter 3: tea parties and delores.

Summary:

request.

Lovely sz Klaus and Dave being Five's parents is just perfection!

 

Can I see Claire and Five having a tea party with uncle Luther? Or Claire giving Dolores to Five, please?

Notes:

hope this suffices:))

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

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It was your typical Wednesday night at the Hargreeves household. Grace and Dave were cleaning, Diego was asleep on the couch, Ben and Vanya were having a discussion over a knew book, and Allison was playing cards with Claire and Luther in the kitchen. Totally typical. Well until Five bursted into the kitchen balling his eyes out and stomping followed by a flustered looking Klaus. Ok, maybe not so typical.

"Woah, what's going on here?" Allison asked, picking Five up as he ran to her.

"Somebody seems upset." Luther mumbled. Claire nodded in agreement.

"Auntie All'son d-daddy is being so super mean!" Five wailed while dramatically throwing his arms around her and burying his face in the crook of her neck. (Five did have a small stutter)

Allison glanced over at Klaus, who looked helpless at the moment, and then back at Five, "What did he do?"

"He w-won't have a tea party with me!" Five continued to sob his heart out.

"Allison I have to head down to the office and I can't take him with me and staying here really isn't an option right now. I wish I could stay but I can't." Klaus rushed out in a blur of words. Its not like he didn’t want to have a tea party with his baby, it’s that he just couldn’t tonight.

"I have to head out too. I'm meeting my manager at a restaurant soon." Allison said and that only made Five cry harder.

"Why are you leavin' me too?" He cried.

Luther looked over to Claire and they shared a look and then nodded.

"Jeez I'm so bored of these cards, I wish there was a party." Luther drew out each of his words as he threw his cards on the table.

"You're right Luther, these cards are boring but I'm also super thirsty. I'm in the mood for some good tea." Claire added, knowing Five would catch their train of thought.

"If only there was going to be a tea party sometime soon." Luther said wistfully.

"We could have a t-tea party uncle Lut'er! A-and Claire can come too!" Five exclaimed with all the childish glee in the world. His tears stopped flowing and his face now held a huge smile and bright eyes.

"That sounds perfect Five!" Claire encouraged.

"Alright pumpkin, me and Allison have to go now, be a good boy for Luther and Claire." Klaus gave Five a quick kiss on the cheek after he responded with 'I'll be super duper good' and then he and Allison left.

"FOLLOW ME!" Five yelled as he ran to his play room, he had a tea party to throw.

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They stopped in Five's room to get a few things.

"Ok Five, do you want the prince costume or the princess costume." Luther asked, holding up two outfits.

"Princess but not that one. It has to be the red one." Five said, practically bouncing on his feet and pointing to the red dress at the top of his closet.

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While Five was growing up Klaus and Dave let him play, dress, and be called anything even if people would usually consider some of the things to be in the girls category or the boys category. They believed that if Five wanted it he should be able to have it, regardless of gender.

A genius way to raise a kid really.

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Now that the trio was now dressed for the tea party, tiaras included, they headed to the playroom for said tea party. Well Five jumped ahead.

When Luther and Claire walked into the room they saw five chairs sat around a small table. In three of the chairs sat Five, Kitty, and Delores. It was an adorable sight and soon Luther and Claire joined the tea table.

Almost as soon as they sat down Five had given them tea cups and poured them some 'tea'.

Thus beginning the tea party.

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"Prince Lut'her I think you're the coolest space man ever! I can't believe you lived on the moon!" Five exclaimed, practically bouncing in his seat.

"It was one of my greatest adventures Monkey." He replied, he hated the moon but the kid didn't need to know.

"Were t-there any...aliens?" Five was a curious kid and honestly who didnt want to know if there were aliens out there.

"I haven't met any. Yet." Luther drawled out.

Five's face then shown curiosity and fear.

"Don't worry Five, I'd protect you from any aliens." Claire said while giving Five a bright smile.

He smiled right back at her, "You're the best knight e-ever Claire!"

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The trio spent the night sipping on imaginary tea and cookies while pretending to be royals from a far off land. The night was perfect and went by with a smoothness that was rare in the Hargreeves household. Who knew Luther could stand to wear a tiara for a whole night? And even though the weren't really princes, princesses, and knights, the tea party was still magical. It was the first tea party they had but it sure as hell wouldn't be there last.

 

Yes, Dave did sneak a few pictures throughout the night but that was only between him and Klaus.

 

-----delores-----

[Claire in this is 9, Five is 3]

Since Allison and Patrick now had joint custody over Claire, it was decided that she'd spend two weeks at her dads and then two weeks at her moms on loop. Right now it was her last night at her moms house and she was watching a movie with Five trying to drown out the heated arguing of the Hargreeves siblings and Dave.

For the second time this week, that makes it the seventh time in this month alone.

Claire, being raised by Patrick and Allison, was used to this so she remained unbothered. But Five was only three and it made him afraid. The yelling, the stomping, the looks, even the occasional knife being thrown in the wall. Over time Five developed the habit of covering his ears everytime someone's voice got to a certain loudness regardless of who it was or what situation he was in. So everytime they argued Claire would take Five up to her room and they'd watch a movie on her laptop.

Tonight's movie was Frozen.

Five was intrigued by Elsa because "she has cool powers too!" but he still held his hands over his ears to drown out the shouting match from downstairs. Claire hated when this happened, hated seeing her baby cousin upset, so she decided to do something more about it. She walked over and pulled open a drawer from her desk and pulled out one of her favorite toys. A barbie doll to be exact.

The doll had porcelain skin and green eyes. She was bald and wore a spotted long sleeve dress.

Her name was Delores.

To most people she probably wasn't worth much but to Claire she meant a lot. She was a comfort object to Claire, what she hugged when she was afraid, what she held onto when she was nervous, what she played with whenever she was happy. So yeah, she meant a lot. But now that Claire was nine she didn't really have a use for her anymore. Which is why she decided that Delores was needed elsewhere.

Claire walked back over to Five and handed him the doll. She explained that Delores knew how to help and that she would always he there for him when Claire couldn't. After her whole explanation Five looked up at her and whispered two gentle words.

"thank you."

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Notes:

requests are open :))

Chapter 4: poof.

Summary:

request.

First if all: THIS IS SUPER CUTE AND I LOVE IT!!!

Second: I have a request!!! How do they react to little baby Five teleporting for the first time???

Notes:

sorry this took so long to get up!

hope this is close to what you wanted :))

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

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Dave woke up in bed to a sleeping Klaus curled up to his side, as he did every morning. He gently shook his husband awake and they began getting ready for the day together. Showering, brushing teeth, getting dressed, hair doing, and even making the bed went by in a blissful quietness.

Today was turning out to be perfect.

The sky was an ombre of a regal orange, rose pink, and baby blue and the sun was positively glowing, on the edge of being blinding, through the window. Elderly couples were out on early morning walks looking cute and joggers were getting a headstart on their workouts. This morning was a perfect blend of silence, scenery, and snuggles for Klaus and Dave.

"HOLY SHIT!"

Welp, silence be damned.

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Diego, Ben, and Five were downstairs making breakfast and waiting for the others to wake up when it happened. While the adults were hoping for a calm morning Five had other plans.

"Can I crack the eggs?" He was tugging on Diego's shirt hem, hoping to get his attention. He was succeeding.

"Not today, Five."

tug

"Can I stir it?"

tug

Diego gently removed Five's hand from his shirt, picked him up, and sat him at the table with a bowl of fruit, "No. Eat."

"Can I have some marshmallows?"

"Those aren't for breakfast, Munchkin." Ben decided to jump in before Diego went on his 'that's not healthy my body is my temple' rant.

"Pleeeeeeeaase?"

Five wasn't one to give up until he got what he wanted.

"No."

"Just a teeny weeny bit?"

"No."

"Then can I help mix? Daddy says I'm super good at it."

"Not right now Five."

Diego wasn't one to let anybody win an argument against him even if he was wrong.

"Why not?"

"Because you'll make a mess."

Five crossed his arms and put on a pout, "But I wanna help."

"I already told you no, Five. Just sit in your chair and eat your fruit like a good kid."

"Bennnny, I wanna help."

"Diego said no, sorry shortstack."

That just upset Five, Ben was supposed to be on his side. He started kicking his legs against the chair and hitting his banging his tiny fists on the table.

Diego did not appreciate it.

"Cut it out Five."

Five only kicked harder.

"Here we go again." Ben sighed, Diego and Five were a great duo but they were both capable of being extremely stubborn. The stubbornness, more often than not, would lead to arguments or tantrums or literally anything in between. But it was worse when they agreed cause theres no possible way you could argue against the duo.

"Stop it." Diego said using his 'if you don't do what I say there will be a consequence' voice.

He didn't stop. He banged his fists louder.

"Stop kicking the damn chair and eat your food."

Five gasped, "You said a bad word Dee! That's naughty! Now you have to put money in the money pot!"

Diego just rolled his eyes.

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Ah, yes, the money pot. It was, in a discreet way, a punishment. If you get caught saying a bad word around anyone under the age of 18 (Five and Claire) you would have to put a coin in the money pot, a giant Mason jar filled nearly half way with various coin types. I mean, come on, these are the Hargreeves we're talking about, it was bound to be filled quickly. And these were the Hargreeves so there was bound to arguments about the pot, mostly by those who fell victim to it often.

[Luther: it's rare but it slips out occasionally

Diego: knows and uses every cuss word he knows in English and Spanish

Allison: only when she's irritated

Klaus: has no filter

Five: legally can't cuss

Ben: too innocent

Vanya: it happens every so often

Dave: refuses to cuss

Claire: a few have slipped out

After numerous arguments about it, it was decided that they'd keep using it.]

And yes, it definitely was Dave's idea.

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Diego was getting irritated, he just wanted a peaceful morning. There was an obvious change of plans,"Stop kicking the table. Its obnoxious!"

This had been going on for 12 minutes now.

"Five you know banging on the table is bad." Ben tried reasoning with him, he really had been trying but you can't reason with a toddler.

"Five cut it out right fucking now!" Diego was just about to loose his temper.

"Diego cut it out right fucking now!" Five mocked him, jumping up to stand and jump on his chair.

"Five! That's a bad word!" Ben had to cut in again to discipline the child.

Five didn't seem to care at all. He just continued to jump on his chair and be disobedient. As Diego went to go grab him and sit him back down he disappeared into a flash of blue.

Diego just stopped and stared at the chair shell shocked and Ben started moving everything around in a panicked search for the boy.

"Where the heck did he go?" Ben all but screeched, it wasn't everyday your nephew disappeared in thin air.

"We lost the kid!" Diego was losing it. Yeah he and Five were just arguing but that was his nephew.

Ben started pacing around the table frantically, "Dave is gonna be so upset!"

"Klaus is gonna kill us!" Diego knew Klaus would be upset to hear his son was gone.

Then out of nowhere a scream came from the living room followed by,"HOLY SHIT!"
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Diego, Ben, Dave, and Klaus all ran into the living room to see what had caused the commotion, Klaus and Diego running into each other on the way. What they saw was enough to make anybody panic, but also enough to give any parent a heart attack.

Luther, Vanya, and Allison were all frantically collecting all the pillows, covers, and throw blankets from around the house and piling them by the fireplace that was about ten feet under the taxidermy deer head. The same taxidermy head that none other than Five Hargreeves-Katz was sitting on.

Klaus screamed as soon as he spotted his son. "OH MY GOD! FIVE, HONEY, JUST HOLD ON WE'RE GONNA GET YOU DOWN."

"Hi daddy!" Five giggled, waving his small hand at Klaus. He didn't understand why everyone was freaking out, he thought it was fun up here. Although he was confused on how he got there he still found it amazing.

"How did this happen?" Dave asked looking to his husband's siblings. He was freaking out. His tiny little five year old boy was perched on a deer head!

"Well he was throwing a tantrum in the kitchen and jumping on the table and then out of nowhere he disappeared into like a blue portal!" Diego said at the same time Luther said, "We were just conversing and all of a sudden there was a flash of blue and he was just up there laughing!" Then they glared at each other.

"He has a power?!" Dave was beyond confused, his son was teleporting, he just woke up, and this family was just full of surprises.

Vanya was pacing around the couch, "This is insane."

"He has a power!" Ben was excited, he didn't know that powers would run in the family.

"Get him down!" Klaus yelled, God being a parent was so worrying.

Five was laughing his head off when all of a sudden he disappeared into a blue flash. Again.

Klaus and Dave screamed.

Ben let out a quiet 'woah'.

Allison jaw dropped as he vanished, "Holy shit!"

"Money pot!" Five said from on top of the fridge. Right. By. Diego. Causing him to let out a very *manly shriek.

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This mornings events were now being discussed during a family meeting in the living room.

"Ok, ok. So Five has a power," Dave spoke his words slowly, as if he didn't believe what he was saying, "That's both great and terrifying."

Ben was sat on the floor with Five in his lap, "It's so cool! He can-"

"It's dangerous." Luther objected.

"Not if we teach him how to control it. I mean come on! How cool would it be to be a teleporter!" Ben responded, he was excited to say the least. He was a nerd who lived superhero comics.

"Yeah, we'll all help with him." Vanya added in with a smile.

Klaus smiled back at her, "Thanks Van."

"Do you here that monkey? You have a superpower!" Ben said, grinning as he looked down at Five. He beamed his dazzling smile back at him.

Five was practically bouncing with joy at that, "I'm just like daddy now!"

Klaus was so proud to hear that. His son wanted to be like him! That's every parents dream.

"Oh my God my baby is perfect."

"God you're such a dad now." Diego teased.

"Shut up." Klaus shot back.

"Look Delores, I have superpowers just like daddy and his siblings!" Five was absolutely ecstatic as he talked to the doll.

"Awww!" Vanya smiled at the boy.

"Kids are so precious!" Allison cooed, remembering the time Claire was around Five's age.

"Why is he so cute?" Luther loved his nephew.

"You are so perfect." Ben said as Five hugged him.

"That's adorable." Dave said, grinning proudly at his son.

Klaus looked around the room in admiration, "We're raising him well."

----------

background check:
so fives mom was one of the 43 unique births and was also a surrogate, they used klaus' dna, so five did end up with a power.....or two.....or more.

dun

dun

dun

:•)

----------

Notes:

requests are always open

 

 

 

kudos and comments are appreciated:)))

Chapter 5: upgrade.

Summary:

Klaus gently pried his son's wrists away from his ears, using a hand to tilt his chin up so he could look him in the eye right after. Tears were escaping his ocean eyes, rolling down his face like rivers and pooling on his knees when they fell.

"Hey, it's ok, it's ok"

Notes:

*I'm not homophobic, some words used were just to enhance the plot. I, in no way, mean any of them. Also don't be homophobic kids.*

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

----------

Five's mother was number thirty-two of the forty-three unique births. Her name was Natalia Smith and she possessed the ability to move things with her mind. Telekinesis to be specific. Five's father was number four of the forty-three unique births. He possessed the ability to see, conjure, and speak to the dead along with the ability of levitation. So Five was destin to have a power that combined the twos abilities. But when he was just five years old he gained the ability to teleport. It was weird in the fact that it was nothing like his parents powers in any way. Well at least his first power wasn't.

Five was just thirteen when his second power made an appearance.

----------

School was the definition of hell. And to make it worse Five went to a private school. A private school with uniforms. Gross. Being a Northeast Blackbear was ridiculous, almost all of the other middle schools had no uniform, private or public. Every weekday from first period to seventh period he was stuck in class learning about things he didn't actually care about.

First period math; extremely boring. Second period gym; completely useless. Third period language arts; snooze fest. Fourth period German; not the worst. Lunch; probably the only good part of the day. Fifth period science; worst class ever. Sixth period social studies; wake me up when it's over. Seventh period cooking; absolute disaster.

So to say Five didn't like school would be an understatement.

The only good thing was he got to hang out with friends, mostly during lunches and passing periods but they found ways to talk during class.

One of the worst things was Jake. The schools only bully, and he only had one victim. And that was Five. The thing was Five didn't put things in gender categories. He didn't see nail polish or eyeliner as a girl thing nor did he see football or flannels as a boy thing. So when Five were nail polish to school that got the attention of Jake. The boy would taunt him, call him a girl, use homophobic slurs, sometimes even goes as far as to hit the boy. This of course got worse when he found out the Five had two dads.

Five never told anyone about the bullying. Not a teacher, not an adult, not his family, nobody. But a few of his friends had seen it happen. They tried helping but Five always said it was nothing and that it didn't bother him.

That was a damn lie.

----------

It was a fairly normal Tuesday morning for Five. Diego, Allison, and Vanya had headed off to work, Luther was compiling his moon research into a file with Pogo's help. Ben had headed off to his morning college classes. Five got dressed in his white button up accompanied with a black tie, black plaid shorts, white socks with black dress shoes, the uniform complete with his schools blazer. Then Dave, Klaus, and Five were driving to Five's school.

The only difference was that Five felt a heaviness in his chest, like his emotions were pushing down on his chest and not stopping. He didn't know if it was from being taunted everyday at school or from the arguing that he overheard his aunts and uncles doing last night. But it didn't matter because he couldn't change the way he felt. Physically, he was fine, a little tired, but fine none the less. Emotionally, on the other hand, he felt drained and he just didn't want to deal with anything today.

But that wasn't an option.

"Have a good day, peach!" Klaus waved as Five got out of the car at the school's entrance.

Five didn't say anything back. Not even his usual 'you too Dad'. Nope. He just kept walking until he was inside, leaving Klaus and Dave sharing worries glances.

"What was that all about?"

Klaus just shrugged.

----------

First period was when Olive and Oliver approached him. He had been sitting quietly, head in his hand, staring blankly at the board as the teacher wrote equations for them to work out.

"Are you alright?" They said it in unison, damn twins, concern laced in their tones. He just so happened to sit right in between them, not that he minded, they were his close friends.

"yeah." His voice was no louder than a whisper, his eyes still staring blankly ahead.

"You look sad." Olive noted, always observant.

"Very sad." Oliver agreed. Did twins always have the same thoughts? Five was beginning to think so.

Five have them a small smile. Or at least tried to, it ended up as a sad smile, "I'm okay."

"We're your uncles and aunts arguing again?"

"No." They were but that wasn't what was bothering him.

"Did Jake do something to you again?" Olive and Oliver were two of the few people who knew what Jake did.

Five was scared of what Jake would do today, scared of what he'd do everyday. It was getting to the point where Five just didn't want to go to school anymore. It was just too much for him, "No."

His voice cracked on the 'o'.

"No talking." The teacher chastised, wanting them to focus on the equations up front.

Olive and Oliver shared a 'something's up' look.

----------
Second period was when Mace tried to talk to him. They were running laps around the track today and Five just wanted the class to go by with no one questioning his feelings. He had no such luck.

"Hey, Five? What's going on?" Mace meant well, he was Five's best friend and just wanted to know what was bothering him.

Five just kept running, not wanting to answer.

"You know you can tell me anything."

Five wasn't going to slow down. He kept pace and Mace decided to let it go for now and ask later, running to catch up to Five.

Ten minutes went by before be tried again, "What's wrong?"

"nothing. " They'd moved on to the weights room by now and Five was doing situps while Mace did planks.

"You sure?"

In that same quiet whisper Five responded, " yeah 'course."

You could tell Five wasn't his usual self. His bright ocean eyes were reduced to a cloudy grey, his signature smirk now replaced with a deep frown, his usual confident posture was now a shy slump. He hadn't heard one of Five's witty remarks or smart comebacks once today.

To say Mace wasn't worried would be a lie.

----------

Third period was when Mrs. Brown tried to see what was wrong. Five had his head in his hands again and his eyes held sadness. He was looking down at his worksheet with a stress filled gaze, when did this class get so hard. He began tapping his pencil on the desk repeatedly, begging his brain to help him out. It wasn't working and he was getting anxious. What if everyone else was already done? What if this was easy for them? What if he wasn't smart enough for this class? That's when a hand on his shoulder startled him out if his thoughts.

Mrs. Brown knelt down so she was eye to eye with Five, "Hey there, kiddo. You okay?"

"I'm fine." Five lied, he just felt so emotional today, God knows why.

Mrs. Brown saw straight through the lie.

"You seem a upset and your friends seem worried about you."

"I'm okay."

"Is something wrong?" She gently tried to get him to open up.

"I'm just tired." It wasn't a complete lie, he just wasn't physically tired but emotionally tired.

"Are you sure? I could call your dads if you need me too."

"No, it's okay."

"Okay kid..." She didn't believe him but decided to let it go for the time being.

----------

Fourth period was when Maliki made an attempt.

"Hey, Five, are you-" He began only to be cut of by a small voice

"I'm fine Maliki. Don't worry." Five cut in, not wanting to have this conversation again.

Maliki knew better than that. He might not be the smartest but he was great at detecting emotions, "But-"

"But nothing. I'm okay."

Welp, at least he tried.

----------

Lunch was when he sat with his friends, not saying a word, not even eating. He just sat at the table with his arms folded on the surface, his head resting on them.

"Five you should eat something." Olive

Oliver nodded in agreement.

He didn't respond.

"Seriously are you okay?" Maliki was overly concerned at the moment, Five wasn't one to be quiet.

No answer.

"Should I call your dad?" Leah meant well but she didn't know that the last thing Five wanted was to worry his parents.

He buried his head further in his arms. "no."

Mace tried to get him to open up, "Come on Five, talk to us. We're here for you."

Not a peep.

"Did something happen at home?" Ethan asked, worried for him.

The comment was left unanswered.

"You can tell us." He continued.

He just wanted to be left alone.

Chase was getting anxious, he wanted to know what was up, "Did someone hurt you?"

He picked at his nails that were painted with a soft lilac color.

"I'll beat whoever's ass hurt you!" Devan promised, always ready to defend her friends.

Five sighed.

"We just want to help you."

He nodded, "I know." Then walked out of the cafeteria.

----------

Five was dreading fifth hour. Science was the only class he had with Jake and he wasn't looking forward to it. Not one bit.

Today they were to be put in groups of two and research a type of natural disaster. The teacher began pairing them up and Fives anxiety was starting to grow as she kept making groups leaving Jake as a possible partner for Five. He was silently begging for her to not pair them together, to put him in a different group.

Six kids were left.

"Sam you'll be Bucky's partner. Topic is tsunamis."

Four more to go.

"Morgan you're with Tony. You'll be doing tornadoes."

That left only two people to be paired up.

"Jake you'll work with Five. Your topic is blizzards."

Fuck.

Jake turned his head at record speed and gave Five a shit-eating grin.

Double fuck.

----------

"God your so fucked up! What kind of boy paints his damn nails? Oh yeah, a fag." Jake poked Five in his chest with enough force that made Five stumbled.

Five wasn't in the state of mind that could deal with this type of treatment, "Cut it out."

"Oh I'm sorry princess. I forgot how sensitive woman are."

"I'm not a girl and you know it." He was getting tired of this. Tired of the words, tired of the touching, tired of the way he was being treated. Papers rattled inside their binders.

Jake grabbed Five's wrist, hard enough to bruise it, "Really? Look at your nails. Look at your face. It screams woman!"

Pencils rolled off of their table, "Shut up."

A menacing look took over Jake's face, a warning that things would only get worse from here, "Or what? You'll get one of your fag daddies? Jeez, your whole family is fucked up. I bet you got this from them. You're like a gay disease Five. Nobody wants someone like you. Nobody's going to ever love a gay fairy like you. You'll never be anything more than-"

"Stop it." Five's hands began glowing a faint white. A slight breeze swept through the classroom as it happened.

Jake wasn't going to let up so easily, "You're worthless. You'll never be anything more than a gay f-"

"I SAID STOP!" Five's eyes were no longer turquoise but now a blinding white, glowing unnaturally. His whole body incased in a white glow. He wasn't registering anything that was going on around him. His hands flew to cover his ears, not wanting to hear any more harrassment. Five didn't even seem to notice that he was the eye of the tornado.

Papers, pencils, chairs, beakers, everything that wasn't bolted to the floor began to fly around the room like a tornado. Cabinets and drawers flying open and closed. Windows shattering, beakers breaking as the hit different surfaces, pencils stabbing into walls and tables, chairs making dents in any possible place, the ceiling crumbling slightly.

Kids were hiding underneath tables, the teacher underneath her desk, the only things that weren't incased in the tornado that surrounded Five. Screams rattled through the air, afraid, begging for it all to stop. Five wasn't listening to any of it.

A familiar voice cut through the sound of screams and destruction, "FIVE!"

Every airborne object fell to the ground with a sickening thud. The glowing stopped and Five's eyes returned to their original color. Five looked around the room seeing mass destruction and fearful faces. Had he done this? He turned his head to the voice, afraid of himself,

"Dad..."

----------

After rushing Five out of the school building, Klaus helped him into the car, getting in right after.

"Peach?"

Five was shaking in his seat, his knees brought up to his chest on the seat, his head resting on them. He, once again, clamped his hands over his ears, a habit he's hand since a young age. His eyes were tightly shut, trying to block out the image of the classroom.

Klaus gently pried his son's wrists away from his ears, using a hand to tilt his chin up so he could look him in the eye right after. Tears were escaping his ocean eyes, rolling down his face like rivers and pooling on his knees when they fell.

"Hey, it's ok, it's ok"

"I didn't mean to! I just wanted him to stop!" Five couldn't stop the sob that escaped him. He felt like he just ruined everything, he didn't mean to cause any harm.

That concerned Klaus. Was someone hurting Five? "Wanted who to stop?"

"Jake. He just...he always is tormenting me and bullying me since like fourth grade and I just couldn't take it anymore. But I never meant to do that! I'm sorry!" He just kept sobbing, trying to wipe the tears away only for them to be replaced by a new stream.

"Oh Five, honey look at me. None of this is your fault, you didn't do anything wrong. I promise." Klaus was beyond concerned. Concerned that his son has been bullied for years. Concerned that Five had just unleashed a tornado in a classroom. Concerned that his baby was crying and blaming himself for the while situation.

Five looked at him, porcelain skin decorated with tear tracks, and let out a small whisper, "I'm so sorry."

Klaus pulled his son into a tight hug, whispering sweet nothings in his ear hoping to provide the comfort he so desperately needed right now. Five leaned into the embrace, balling his dads shirt in his fist, holding onto him as he cried his heart out. He just wanted to stay in the safety of his arms and never leave. Klaus wante to take Five, weak him in bubble wrap and blankets, and hold him in his arms until everything was alright. He also had to find out how to help Five control his newfound ability and tell his family about it. Which of course meant a family meeting.

Hopefully it went well.

Oh, who was he kidding? It was a family meeting! Those only ended in some form of disaster.

But for now he was content here with his son bundled in his arms.

----------

Notes:

requests are always welcome :))

Chapter 6: sneeze.

Summary:

request.

 

Oh imagine if lil baby five gets sick and ends up teleporting everytime he sneezes

----------

Notes:

shiiiiiiiiiiiit im not great at sickfics but I hope this is good :))

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

----------

Winter was the Hargreeves favorite season. The cold, crisp air that carried snowflakes was a relief from hot summer days. The snow was absolutely beautiful, coating every surface like a white blanket. It was the perfect time to have hot chocolate and huddle up by the fireplace. And with the new addition ti the family they spent most of their time outside, by the fire, and on the couch, watching Disney movies. And Christmas was definitely a factor in their live for winter.

But there were still some cons to the season.

Of course it was freezing cold most of the time and you'd be lucky to not slip on an ice covered sidewalk. That and it was flu season.

Damn it.

In a big household it would be a miracle if nobody got sick during the winter.

That miracle never came.

----------

Grace was preparing breakfast when the Hargreeves first started piling in, grabbing a quick coffee and greeting her before continuing on to the dining room. So far only Luther, Allison, Vanya, and Ben had come through.

"Good morning mom. Do you need any help?" Diego waved his hand to the stove area. Of course he wanted to help, he was a mommas boy.

Grace gave him a beautiful smile, "Oh, good morning Diego! Could you pass me some plates?"

"Sure." And with that the duo got started on finishing and plating breakfast. It was only ten minutes before Klaus came downstairs.

"Morning knife boy," that earned him a glare from numer two, "Good morning mother." Klaus gave Grace a quick kiss on the cheek before joining one, three, six, and seven in the dining room.

"Oh hey Klaus."

"Hey Benny," He didn't a quick scan of the room, two people were missing. That was weird. Klaus was always the last person downstairs in the morning. "Where's Dave and Five?"

It made sense that those two were missing together as it was Dave's job to help Five get ready in the morning. What didn't make sense was the fact that they weren't here, they usually were here before anyone else.

"Upstairs." Allison replied, not looking up from her phone. Paparazzi had gotten photos of her and the rest of the academy and rumors were spreading like wildfire. How fitting.

That was a bit of a shock, "Still?"

She looked up this time, "Yup." Allison popped the 'p'.

"Why?"

"Five was being uncooperative." Vanya muttered at the same time Luther said, "Tantrum."

Fuck.

----------

"Five stop acting like that." Five was currently on the floor, shirtless, fussing and whining about getting dressed. Five wasn't feeling well, Dave was struggling with this morning's tantrum, it was hard on them both. It had already taken Dave ten minutes to get him out of bed due to crying and getting dressed didn't seem to be going any quicker.

Five just crossed his arms and gave Dave the best glare he could through tearful red rimmed eyes, "I don't want that shirt. Just wanna stay in my pjs!"

"Well that's too bad, pumpkin. You have to get dressed."

"I-I don't want to!" Five kept fussing about it. He was tired and cold and just didn't feel good, he wasn't about to do something he didn't want to.

Dave knew how to deal with his son's tantrums, having sealed with them for years, "Arms up."

"No!" Five was tearing up again, he was upset. His throat hurt, his nose was clogged, and his head was pounding against his skull.

Flu be damned.

"Five Hargreeves-Katz put your sweater on right now or you'll get a timeout."

Five let out a weak cry as he let Dave put his pastel pink sweater on followed by his light wash jean overalls. (and yes he has pink fuzzy socks to match, Dave really did coordinate his five year olds outfits) He didn't care if he was warmer now, he wanted to wear pajamas all day.

"Look at you! Cute as a button!" Dave cooed softly. "Now come on, let's go get some breakfast."

Five decided he didn't want to walk all the way downstairs and opted for putting his arms up, signaling he wanted to be picked up.

Dave complied and the duo made their way downstairs, Dave taking note of the heat coming from Five.

----------

"There's my boys!" Klaus grinned as he spotted Five and Dave in the doorway. Five turned his head away from Dave's shoulder to look at Klaus, giving him a small wave. That only made Klaus smile bigger, returning the wave enthusiastically.

The rest of the Hargreeves said their good mornings to Five before returning back to their breakfast, Diego muttering something about Five being quiet for someone who just had a tantrum, Allison smacking his arm for it.

"Anyone want coffee?" Dave asked, noticing that nobody made a pot yet. That was shocking. Coffee is what fueled every adult in the house enough to function like a normal human in society.

A chorus of 'yes's came from around the table.

Dave nodded, "Alrighty then." He handed Five over to Allison and continued towards the kitchen to start a pot of coffee.

"Hey Fivey!" Allison had Five on her lap facing her.

It turned out to be a big mistake.

Five looked up at her, nose twitching, eyes watering, like a little bunny. It was cute and Allison made sure to tell him that. Or at least it was cute until Five sneezed. On Allison.

Her face wrinkled up, "Oh, gross Five."

He didn't answer her. Instead he sneezed again.

When Allison looked down to say 'bless you' Five was no longer in her lap.

"What the f-" She was cut off by a short yelp that came from downstairs.

----------

Pogo was downstairs cleaning up one of their practice rooms turned movie theater when it happened.

He was sweeping the floor when none other than Five Hargreeves-Katz popped up in one of the chairs rubbing his nose.

And yeah, Pogos yelp was a little less manly than he could've wished.

He took a calming breath, "Well hello little one."

Five waved his small hand in his direction and whispered a small, "Hi Pogo"

"What brings you down here? I do believe it's time for breakfast."

"I dunno. Came here by accident." Five was confused to say the least. He was already trained. The last time he had accidental jumps was months ago.

"How about we go back up-" Pogo was cut off by a small sneeze coming from Five but when he looked up he was gone.

He muttered a quick, "Huh." before getting back to work.

----------

Sneeze.

A scared scream from Vanya in her room.

Sneeze.

A knife thrown into the living room ceiling by Diego.

Sneeze.

A small gasp and 'Hey shortstack' from Ben in the hallway.

Sneeze.

A warm smile from Grace at her charging station.

Sneeze.

A 'manly' shriek from Luther in the weight room.

Sneeze.

A confused Pogo still in the movie room.

Sneeze.

His own room with Delores staring at him with a soft gaze.

Sneeze.

----------

"TODDLER ON THE LOOSE!" Klaus was in a panic as he ran to the kitchen to inform Dave of what just happened.

"Excuse me?" Dave wasn't sure if he heard Klaus right, Five was in the dining room with Allison.

He had no time for confused husbands, "Five's disappeared!"

"What do you mean Five's disappeared?" Worry was beginning to take over his voice, nobody wants to hear that their child has disappeared.

"We were just eating and then he just sneezed and disappeared!"

"Damn it, he is sick. He felt a little warmer than usual this morning but I wasn't sure." Dave began to worry, his doctor and father instincts kicking in and battling. Find your son! Cure that sick child! In the end they both won. "Where is he now?"

"I don't know Davey! That's the prob-"

A bright flash of blue interrupted him and he was way to relieved to even be startled.

"Daddy..." Five's soft voice came from the counter, where he was currently sitting, reaching for Klaus.

Klaus immediately rushed to pick up the sick kid, "Oh thank God! Hey peach, where have you been?"

"Everywhere." Five balled his hands in Klaus' shirt and coughed softly.

Klaus began to rub his back softly, "Poor Fivey, a little under the weather, huh?" He cooed.

He only shook his head and mumbled, "Don't feel good. "

"Well let's get some medicine in you shortstack." Dave gave him a smile before going to retrieve the medicine.

----------

The Hargreeves-Katz trio spent the rest of the night snuggled up in a blacket for with Disney movies and tons of stuffed animals. They were truly the image of a perfect family.

But if sick days meant tons of hugs, family time, and doting then maybe, just maybe, sick days weren't too bad.

 

 

And yes Allison did sneak in and take pictures but they didn't need to know that.

----------

Notes:

requests are always open :))

Chapter 7: training.

Summary:

request.

----------

"Five conjured a small tornado, or at least everything around him was levitating and spinning. It's like an upgraded telekinesis. And, yeah, it happened at school with people around, nobody was hurt and we have enough to pay for the damage. But it wasn't his fault, ok? As far as we know its triggered by emotions, like Vanyas was at first. We'll help Five train his power just like we helped Vanya."

"Let's get started then." Ben said, silently vowing to help his nephew, he knew the troubles of gaining control of your abilities. He had eldritch monsters come out of his stomach for gods sake!

----------

Notes:

ahhhhh this was fun to write....

 

....then I lost my train of thought and the end turned out like....well just read it ;))

 

also it's really short but eh

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

----------

"So what's this family meeting even for?" Luther asked once everyone had piled into the living room for a meeting that, surprisingly, was called by Klaus.

Klaus glanced over to Five, who was still in his school uniform looking tired and drained, before answering, "Five has another power."

"Holy shit." Diegos eyes widened in surprise. It was a shock that Five was even born with a power but now he had a second? That was pretty rare. Even in this family only Diego and Klaus had a additional power.

"What is it?" Allison and Dave said in unison, giving each other a smile after.

"That's so cool, monkey!" Ben said smiling at Five who was sitting next to him, per usual. Ben was, undeniably, his favorite uncle and they spent a lot of time together.

Five gave a weak smile back, still exhausted, both emotionally and now physically, from the incident that occurred earlier at school. He wasn't even sure if he wanted this newfound ability.

"How do you know?" Vanya was curious, how did they discover the new power? Had Five shown Klaus? Was it an accidental discovery?

"Well his power is like a mix of mine and his mothers-"

Five's head perked up at that, "What?" He had never met his mother, never heard anything about her. He didn't know her name, what she looked like, not even who she was. But what shocked him was that she was special.

"His mom has a power?" Allison asked, disbelieving, this family tree was just filled with all sorts of surprises.

Luther found that insane. What was the chance that out of all of the people in the world Klaus' surrogate was on of the forty-three children born special, "She was one of the forty-three?"

Ben made eye contact with Diego before muttering, "The plot thickens."

Klaus rolled his eyes at his siblings instincts to interrupt and question almost everything, "Yes Five's mom is one of the forty-three. Her name is Natalia and she had the ability of telekinesis," A chorus of 'woah's were heard around the room, "As I was saying earlier, Five's power is somewhat a mix of her telekinesis and my levitation."

"That doesn't answer the question Klaus. What's is it?" Luther pressed, tired of Klaus dancing around the questions.

Diego seemed to be tired of it too, "What can he do?"

"And are we not going to talk about the fact that Five showed off his ability during school? In front of people. I thought we agreed to keep all of our powers a secret!" Luther added on. Sure, they showed off powers as kids but they had masks and nobody would recognize them now anyways so they agreed to keep them hidden.

That seemed to get the attention from his siblings.

Vanya looked to her brother before speaking, "I hate to agree with Luther but Five shouldn't be displaying his powers out for everyone to see."

"I didn't mean to. " Five mumbled, not wanting to draw any more attention than necessary to himself. Also nobody told him that family meetings were this tiring.

Ben seemed to be the only to hear Five and the regret in his voice. He put an arm around the kids shoulder and pulled him into a side hug. Five fell into the hug with ease and relief.

"Who all saw it?"

"The news could've seen!"

"We told you it was best for him to be homeschooled!"

"Did you even think about the consequences?"

"What if he caused damage? He could've hur-"

"SHUT UP!" Klaus was getting fed up with the interruptions, "If you'd all just shut up for a second then I could explain!"

And for once they all went silent.

"Five conjured a small tornado, or at least everything around him was levitating and spinning. It's like an upgraded telekinesis. And, yeah, it happened at school with people around, nobody was hurt and we have enough to pay for the damage. But it wasn't his fault, ok? As far as we know its triggered by emotions, like Vanyas was at first. We'll help Five train his power just like we helped Vanya."

"Let's get started then." Ben said, silently vowing to help his nephew, he knew the troubles of gaining control of your abilities. He had eldritch monsters come out of his stomach for gods sake!

----------

The Hargreeves set up a bunch of soft items in one of the old practice rooms for Five to train in, so there wouldn't be injuries when the tornado started. The room had three solid walls and one glass wall that you could see in from the outside but not the inside. Most definitely from Reginald taking notes on them.

Vanya and Ben were in the room with him, being the strongest of the bunch and knowing how to learn control, helping get training started. The rest of the Hargreeves and Dave stood outside if the room, encouraging and motivational words spilling from their mouths.

Five had been trying for ten minutes by now, nothing happening.

No gust of wind.

No items flying.

No glowing eyes.

Just nothing.

And Five was getting irritated, everyone was saying 'its ok' 'just keep trying' and he was over it.

"UGH! JUST SHUT UP!" Five was over it, completely done with everything and everyone. His eyes were incased in a deadly white glow as every single pillow and blanket and stuffed animal the room were incased in a whirling tornado, Ben and Vanya somehow not included in it.

"So its definitely controlled emotionally." Vanya concluded.

Ben gave her the most unimpressed look he could muster up, "Yeah, no shit Vanya."

----------

The next week they tried it again, Five finally gaining control of his emotions and somewhat control of the objects. Until Diego got hit in the face with a pillow.

"Fucking hell Five!"

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The next week they tried it with water. Luther being the one in the room this time. Water was splashing against the walls and dripping from the ceiling. The floor was now coated in a slippery one inch pool. Five was completely dry. And Luther, well...

"...I'm drenched." Luther was covered from head to toe in water.

----------
And then paper. Diego somehow ended up in the room again and ended up with a shocking amount of paper cuts.

"God damn it kid."

Five gave him a shit eating grin, "Oops."

----------

It happened during game night. Five had won a game of uno and was overly excited. Hence the flying cards.

Allison looked around the room, "What..."

"The..." A wide eyed Ben had the same thought as his sister.

Diego was never not going to be shocked by the tornadoes, "Fuck..."

Five just sat back and laughed, "Money pot!"

----------

"KLAUS I SWEAR TO GOD! COME GET YOUR KID!"

Diego was currently outside in their newly installed pool getting attacked by a tornado of water. To say he was happy would be a lie.

A child's laugh could be heard from inside.

Klaus could only smile and say, "Boys will be boys."
----------

"Happy birthday!" Five grinned, swirling confetti all around the room. The Hargreeves were surprised, this was a new take on confetti bombs. Klaus, of course, loved it.

He ran and picked Five up, spinning him around in a bone crushing hug, "Thanks peach!"

"There is no way in hell I'm cleaning this up." Diego said before anyone else had the chance to react.

----------

Five? Trained.

Everyone else? Relieved.

Diego? Mind fucked.

Klaus? Amused.

Practice room? Destroyed.

Messes? Made.

Hotel? Trivago.

----------

Notes:

requests are always open :))

Chapter 8: uncle diego.

Summary:

Five grabbed a colorful box and began shaking it, "Look at this, Diego!"

"What do you hav-" Diego cut himself of with a laugh, "Five, kiddo, those are tampons."

Notes:

this is by far my favorite chapter

 

 

just ahhhh I love them

 

:)))

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

----------

 

Diego, Five decides, is his favorite uncle. Well his second favorite, but that doesn't need to be discussed. Out of the uncles, strong uncle, tough uncle, and soft uncle, Diego was the tough uncle. He beat up bas guys and could throw knives. Hell, he was like a superhero!

 

Five thought that was one of the coolest things ever.

 

And although Diego was all tough and edgy he still had a strong personality, personality traits included.

 

Diego was stubborn, never one to agree to someone else's idea, especially Luther's, unless it somehow benefited him. He was also very short tempered, which, as we all know, is a very great trait to have. Plus the fact that he had this whole 'I'm a badass motherfucker and I'll stab you, bitch' vibe going on. 

 

Five also had a very,very strong personality, despite being only five years old and just three feet tall and barely forty pounds.

 

The boy was always smart for his age and that led to him always wanting to be right. Yet he was increasingly curious, asking questions about anything and everything he didn't know but took interest in, his favorite right now was numbers. Five was also used to being spoiled, a side effect of living with Klaus and Dave, so when he didn't get his way you could always count on a tantrum from the boy.

 

So you'd think that their personalities would clash, and they most definitely do, but the two still loved to hang out.

----------

 

Kidnapper: I have your son

 

Diego, a vigilante: I don't have a son

 

Kidnapper: Than who just asked us for marshmallows and peanutbutter and gave us the finger while rolling past on light up heelies?

 

Diego: Oh my god they have Five 

 

----------

 

Five was a boy on a mission, running into the kitchen in search of someone to help him out with it. His run halted when he saw Diego leaning against the kitchen counter.

 

He quickly jumped over to the man, "Uncle Dee!"

 

"What's up, kiddo?" Diego got over the shock of the boy teleporting fairly quick and was now curious to what he wanted.

 

"I need your help!" Five exclaimed with all the exaggeration he could muster up, resembling every dramatic play in the world of theater.

 

Diego nods, encouraging Five to continue.

 

His nephew quickly answered, "I need to bake a cake."

 

Diego wasn't expecting that.

 

"Why in the world would you need to do that?" It was like three in the afternoon on a thursday, why the hell would the kid need a cake?

 

"'Cause it's Delores' birthday!" Five replied, acting as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

 

Oh, so Five's barbie needed a cake for her birthday. He wasn't sure if he was missing some information or something but the fact that Five was demanding a cake for a doll was mindboggling to Diego.

 

"She doesn't need a cake." Was what Diego decided to say.

 

Five didn't even consider that as an option. Delores needed a cake. It was a birthday tradition.

 

Duh.

 

He didn't understand why Diego couldn't see that, "She does!"

 

Let the arguing begin.

 

"No she doesn't." Diego rebutted.

 

They were stuck in a battle of wills.

 

"Yes she does!" Five was now tuhhing on the hem of Diego's shirt as if it would help him change his mind.

 

It didn't. And now Diego was using his 'I'm the adult which means I have authority and you listen to me kiddo' voice, "No."

 

At hearing that, Five threw himself onto Diego's leg, very much resembling a koala, and began screaming at the top of his lungs.

 

"Five cut that out. Five! Fiv- jesus why are you so loud?" This wasn't the first time Diego fell victim to Fives screaming and he knew the kid wouldn't be stopping anytime soon, "Fine! We can make a cake."

 

Five was excited now, "Yay!"

 

The duo spent the next couple of hours struggling to make a cake and at the end it was a mess. 

 

Five somehow ended up with flour everywhere on him and frosting on his mouth and nose. Dont even ask about how he managed to get sprinkles in his hair. Diego, thankfully, was a lot cleaner. He, like Five, had managed to get flour nearly everywhere but he didn't have excess ingredients decorating his hair.

 

"Delores is gonna love this, Dee!" Five was jumping up and down with childish glee.

 

It made Diego smile.

 

"Yeah. She definitely will, kiddo." 

 

Maybe the duo could get along better than everyone else thought.

 

"Hey, you know what you look like right now? That little chick from Wreck-it Ralph. Vanelope, I think. But like more of a mess." Diego was now laughing his head off at the realization.

 

Oh well, them getting along would probably trigger an apocalypse.

 

----------

 

Dave: YOU GAVE FIVE COFFEE!?!

 

Diego: Of course not, I just gave him some juice [points to three empty cans of red bull]

 

Five: [runs by in twinkle toes, pineapple shaped glasses, and a hawaiian shirt] YEE HAW! LET ME HEAR YOU SCREAM IF YOUR TINY AND WHINY [inhumanely screeches]

 

----------

 

It was Diegos turn to do the grocery shopping and he just so happened to have his five year old companion with him at the time. So he decided to bring him along on his trip to Target. Ten minutes into shopping, Five is sitting in the cart grabbing almost everything he can reach and throwing it in the cart.

 

Diego, of course, takes most of it back out.

 

They headed down the beauty aisle, due to Klaus' request, to buy some more eyeliner and nail polish.

 

Five grabbed a colorful box and began shaking it, "Look at this, Diego!" 

 

"What do you hav-" Diego cut himself of with a laugh, "Five, kiddo, those are tampons."

 

"Tampons?" Five stretched out the word, it being foreign to him.

 

Diego was laughing his head off at this point, "Yeah."

 

"Can we get them? Please?" Five held the box up to Diego, using puppy dog eyes for effect.

 

"You don't need them." Diego chuckled.

 

Five was tugging on Diego's sleeve now, "Yes I do!"

 

Reasoning with a child was never easy. Hence the reasons adults used bribes, "How about this? If you put those back I'll get you a treat."

 

"Ok!" Five through the bow back on the shelf, a smile now on his lips.

 

The two left the store with mostly unnecessary treats and snacks, some groceries making it in the basket, and a great story to tell.

 

----------

 

Delores:

 

Five: *gasps* Delores!

 

Diego: . . .

 

Delores:

 

Five: oh stop, your so dramatic

 

Diego: what the aCtuAL FUCK?!

 

----------

 

"I still don't understand how you two managed to get skunked." Allison was completely caught off guard when Five and Diego came home smelling like everything bad in the world.

 

Diego pointed a finger to the youngest Hargreeves, "It was his fault."

 

Diego and Five were at the park when Five had walked over to him with something in his hands. Five claimed it was a dog but upon closer inspection Diego found out it was a skunk. He freaked out, causing Five to freak out, causing him to drop the skunk, causing the skunk to freak out and spray them.

 

And that's how they ended up in little kiddie pools filled with tomato juice.

 

"You two are absolutely ridiculous." Allison found this whole situation hilarious, completely ridiculous, but hilarious.

 

Diego, impatient as ever, looked up to Allison, a questing look on his face, "How long is this going to take?"

 

"A while. You two smell like shit." Allison chuckled.

 

Five gasped, "Money pot!"

 

"Ugh."

 

Allison laughed softly, "Maybe next time you go to the park don't pick up a skunk."

 

"It was Five!" Diego insisted, not wanting to take the blame for this. 

 

Five stopped splashing around and licker his finger, grinning, "This tastes good."

 

Allison quickly moved his hand away from his mouth, "Don't eat that, Five."

 

This family is a mess.

 

----------

 

Dave: what scares you the most?

 

Klaus: ghosts

 

Ben: heights

 

Allison: sharks

 

Vanya: the dark

 

Diego: the unstoppable marching of time that he slowing, yet surely, leading us all towards an inevitable death

 

Five: . . . diego

 

----------

 

Five and Diego; not always compatible, insane, a dangerous duo, and completely out of control.

 

Also Five and Diego; loving softies, chaotic messes, and one of the best nephew/uncle duos out there.

 

So, yeah, the two didn't always get along but they sure as hell knew how to have a good time.

 

----------

 

Notes:

request always open :)))

Chapter 9: five.

Summary:

----------

And, yeah, his family had a huge impact on his personality, but Five wasn't them. He had his own personal interests, traits, likes, and dislikes. He was very much his own person and he couldn't be happier.

----------

Notes:

here's a short chapter i whipped up in a few minutes.

 

mostly to keep this alive :)

 

 

 

requests are open :))

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Five Hargreeves-Katz was an expressive child. And no, this isn't one of those things that he developed over the years. Its not like something his parents forced on him. Not at all. No, Five had been expressive ever since his first word.

His first word was wow.

Klaus had laughed the rest of the day after he said it and Diego was beyond impressed. Most babies started out with 'mama' or 'dada'. Not Five. Not even three minutes after saying wow, Five repeated it until he learned another word, which just so happened to be no. And then goose.

That increased his personality, And it sure as hell didn't stop there. Five expressed himself mostly through his actions. And, of course, it showed.

Five was just two years old when he got his first magnifying glass, making everything out to be a mystery. Out of syrup? It was a thief. Delores was lost? A kidnapping. Muddy footprints? The monster from under the bed. Five stopped playing with his magnifying glass after that.

He was four when he learned how to throw darts perfectly. Yes, it was Diego who taught him. And yes, Dave was beyond shocked, a little terrified, and a little proud. Klaus on the other hand thought it was pretty cool.

Six when he pretended to be a stressed fashion designer for nearly three weeks. He completely refused to wear anything purple, orange, and gray along with any socks that weren't stripped or spotted. Five even convinced everyone, minus Dave(who he claimed was his assistant)to put on a fashion for him. But staying true to his troubled designer personality, he declared the whole thing a disaster.

The boy was seven when Claire showed him how to have attitude. She was thirteen at the time and was going through her misfit phase, and found it only necessary to teach Five. He learned everything from the silent treatment to backsassing. That, of course, added to his tantrums, making them worse. Claire was grounded for weeks after that.

Surprisingly only eight when he had his first role in a theater play. Klaus had seen his flare for dramatics and took him to a play, where Five decided he wanted to be in one. He ended up playing a quadruplet named Nicky, who was deemed the innocent one out of the four.

Five was ten when he brought an octopus home in a tank, claiming it was a friend for Ben. Crazy thing was it wasn't the first, nor the last, animal Five had randomly brought home. Nobody knows where he got it or even how he got it, but he had it. Ben found the whole thing hysterical while the others saw it as gross, Five proud of himself. Until it touched him, resulting in screams and an octopus sale. Ben found it even funnier.

He got his first solo in a musical, he was just twelve. Five loved the town's local theater, hence the reason he auditioned for the coming musical. He got the part, of course, and his whole family came out to see the show.

He was fourteen when a huge flu outbreak came around. He was constantly scrubbing down every surface and item before anyone could spread germs or even get close to catching the flu. It continued to happen every time sickness came around.

Despite the fact that Five had many different interests and things he wanted to do he still made time for everything, personality not getting in the way. The kid was a go getter, a hard worker, and a persistent boy. After all, he needed to express himself somehow.

And it was most likely due to the fact that he grew up with the Hargreeves and Katz.

----------

Luther was the cause of his love of mystery and science. He'd taught Five all about his time in the moon and all the research he did. Luther had even helped him solve his mysteries during his little detective phase, not questioning the fact that it was pretend.

Diego was the cause of his skills with weapons and bold speech. Teaching him everything from accuracy to how to tackle someone twice your size.(poor Claire) Five thought it was cool, Dave thought it was too dangerous, Klaus was torn between the two, Diego just saw it as an activity.

Allison we the cause of his love for fashion. It seemed like ever since Five had the ability to talk, he and Allison had talked about clothes. It was pretty cute, all the fashion shows and dress up parties. As Five got older it developed into more mature talks, rating met gala looks and shopping together.

Klaus was the cause of his dramatics, love for the theater. He'd taken Five to multiple plays, some musicals, and they'd loved it. It became a father son activity. They'd even stared in a play together. Yes, Dave totally cried during the show.

Ben was the cause of his love for animals. One time Ben had brought a cat home, before it found a family, and Five thought it was the coolest thing. So naturally he began bringing animals home for Ben. After a while he learned he shouldn't do that and instead he and Ben went to zoos and pet stores.

Vanya was the cause of his musical talent. She had tried to teach Five the violin, tried, but it went horribly wrong. But when she'd heard him singing quietly they explored that interest. They even preformed little shows for the family. Dave cried.

Dave was the cause of his need to be clean and orderly. Dave himself couldn't help but want everything clean, he had a kid and needed to make sure he didn't get sick or hurt. Five after a few years learned about germs and sickness and was always making sure everything was up to good health.

Claire was the cause of his attitude. No, he didn't get all of his attitude from Claire, but she sure as hell had a impact on it. She was a total diva and Allison and Klaus were hesitant on letting the two meet. They were right to be. Not even two weeks after they met, Five had learned how to roll his eyes and say 'fuck'.

And, yeah, his family had a huge impact on his personality, but Five wasn't them. He had his own personal interests, traits, likes, and dislikes. He was very much his own person and he couldn't be happier.

----------

Notes:

requests are open :))

Chapter 10: helen.

Summary:

How about he fam meeting vanya a gf? (Maybe Helen?)

Notes:

sorry, i rushed this one a bit

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Vanya had just recently gotten into a relationship. It made her happy, made her feel like even if the moon crumbled she'd be ok as long as she had her. Everytime they were together time seemed to slow down, every background noise faded away, every person out of focus. Vanya loved her with everything she had.

 

And Helen loved her back.

 

Naturally everybody in the household noticed a difference in Vanya's mood recently and would they really be the Hargreeves if they didn't question her?

 

It was after lunch when Klaus decided to bring it up. It was the perfect time, Five was taking a nap, Claire was doing homework, and all the adults were at the table, "So what's new, Vanya?"

 

"Uh..nothing." It was a bad lie, everyone could tell she was making excuses and Vanya knew it.

 

"You can tell us. We won't make fun of you." Ben said, a soft smile on his face.

 

"Cone on, tell us." Diego prodded.

 

"Tell us everything!" Allison, of course, loved gossip.

 

"Tell us tell us tell us tell us tell us te-" Klaus repeated until Vanya cut him off. 

 

"I have a girlfriend!" She blushed as the words left her mouth.

 

"Ooo." Ben drew out the word, a slight hint of amusement in his voice.

 

Luther cut in with the basics, "What's her name?"

 

"Can we meet her?" Klaus asked, wanting nothing more than to meet his sister's lover.

 

"Who is she?" Dave asked, ever so quiet and gentle. Thank God for that.

 

"Do we know her?" Allison questioned.

 

"When can we meet her?" Klaus asked again. Always persistent.

 

Naturally, Diego asks a weird question, "Does she have a criminal record?"

 

"I want to meet her." Klaud finalized.

 

"Her name is Helen Cho. She's the first chair violinist in the orchestra but I don't think any of you know her. And, jesus, no she doesn't have a criminal record. But I, uh, I think it would be cool if you guys met her. Maybe she can come over for dinner?"

 

"Perfect!" Klaus exclaimed at the same time Dave replied, "Sounds good to me."

 

Vanya smiled.

 

"So who's gonna tell the kids?"

 

Vanya's smile turned into a look of pure terror as she remembered the last time they had a guest over. Which was two years ago. 

 

----------

 

Diego walked in with his hand held in a women's, "This is Eudora. Eudora this is everyone."

 

"Hi! I'm Ben." Ben had heard a lot about Eudora and was happy to meet her. But he was generally happy all the time.

 

"I'm Luther." He shook her hand as he studied her, as if he could tell everything about her by just looking.

 

Allison was eager to meet Diego's girlfriend, she had been for a while, "It's nice to meet you! I'm Allison and this is my daughter Claire."

 

"I can set the world on fire." Claire said, looking directly in Eudoras eyes will she conjured a small flame on her pinkie. Eleven year olds are really something else.

 

At a loss of words Patch muttered  "That's… neat?"

 

Claire only smirked and glared in return.

 

"Oh, um, I'm Vanya." Vanya greeted, ever so nervous. 

 

"I'm Klaus, this is Dave, and this is our son Five! Say hi, Five"

 

When Five didn't say anything Klaud let out a small sigh, "He's just a little shy, that's all."

 

"Well, Five, it's very nice to meet you. You're cute as a button." Eudora smiled.

 

Five, being three at the time, let out an inhuman screech before screaming, "SHE'S GONNA SEW ME ONTO HER CLOTHES, DADDY!" He wasted no time in grabbing both Dave and Klaus' hand and running them all away from the room. Most of the room was left snickering or sighing, Eudora was just left dumbfounded.

 

Diego sighed, "Welp. That went well."

 

----------

 

"Ok, Five, what are we not going to do today?" Dave asked as he helped Five put on his cherry red sweater.

 

Putting his arms through the sleeves Five replied, "Scream or run away."

 

Clipping his black overalls over his shoulder, "And what do we do when someone says hi?" 

 

"Say hi back!" Five answered with a certain amount of pride.

 

"And when someone compliments us?" Dave continued, finishing getting his son dressed up by helping him into his red converse.

 

"We say thank you, Daddy!"

 

"Good job, peach!" He quickly picked Five up and gave him all the praise he could. Such a proud dad moment.

 

----------

 

"Claire your thirteen years old so I'm expecting you to behave yourself. No threats, do not, and I repeat, do not start a fire. Don't even use your powers, ok? And do not convince Five that she's a murderer, witch, zombie, or anything. We are not having another Patch incident. Do you understand?" Allison explained, hoping that for once her angsty teen daughter would listen.

 

"Yes, I understand. But you have to admit that it was funny when Five though Patch was a witch." Claire chuckled, remembering the events.

 

"It's not funny, Claire. Diego never brought her over anymore."

 

----------

 

"Guys, meet Helen, Helen meet my family!" Vanya was smiling as she introduced them, happy that it was finally happening. She watched as they all lined up to greet Helen, which was the way she hoped would be best. I mean, come on, how could a line go wrong?

 

"Hi, I'm Luther." Always first to go, Luther made his introduction sweet and short.

 

Helen smiled at him, "It's nice to meet you."

 

Diego walked up to shake her hand, "Diego." Helen shook his hand in return, Diego impressed by her firm handshake. Respect.

 

"I'm Allison!" Allison gave Helen her best friendly smile. "Lovely to meet you, Allison."

 

"Hello Helen, my name is Claire." Claire gave her best shiteating grin, it was a bit creepy but ok. She shook Helen's hand as she said it. 

 

"Woah your have very warm hands. Nice to meet you." Helen didn't even know what yo do with a kid, they're terrifying.

 

"I'm Klaus!" Klaus exclaimed and Dave added to it right after, "And I'm Dave." They both gave Helen warming smiles and she returned them.

 

Ben stepped up next, "It's nice to meet you, Helen. I'm Ben."

 

"It's nice to meet you too."

 

Five practically ran up to the woman, "I'm Five!"

 

Helen didn't know what the hell to say, "Wow, aren't you a big kid."

 

"No, my name is Five!"

 

"That's cool." Helen might not known what you do with a child but she thought this one wasn't too bad.

 

----------

 

The night went well. Helen got along with the whole family, there was no screaming, running, teleporting, fires, or disasters. Diego and Luther even got along for the night. 

 

Vanya couldn't be happier.

Notes:

all requests are welcome

Chapter 11: innocence.

Summary:

Omg I don't know if this is too weird, but I thought it would be funny if the family found out that Five lost his virginity at 15 (maybe with Grayson?) and everyone's reactions are so different (like "he's too young!" to "so, was he any good?" to "I CAN'T BELIEVE MY BABY ISN'T INNOCENT ANYMORE!" to "Did you two at least use protection?")

Notes:

i-

 

honestly it's super short but like i love it and you'll get the gist of it

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Five should’ve known that having Grayson over for boys night would end in disaster, but he ignored the feeling and did it anyways. Really al they were doing was playing cards at the table so really it wouldn't go that bad...right? It went worse than he could have ever expected.

 

And it all started with a smart ass remark from Dave, “Klaus you are such a bottom.”

 

“I am not!.” Klaus argued, feigning offence, as Grayson smirked, “Like father, like son.”

 

The whole room went silent and Dave choked on his water, “I’m sorry, what?”

 

“I-I, what h-he means is that, um, I- Gray, uh, he topped last time b-but we, um-” Five stuttered out, completely unprepared for this conversation to be happening, “ibottomedlastnightsothatswhatgraystalkingaboutiguessbutumitsnitabigdealsoweantotallyforgetthishappen-”

 

Klaus cut him off his sons ramble with an inhuman shriek, “YOU LOST YOUR VIRGINITY?! YOUR ONLY FIFTEEN!”

 

“I-”

 

“Arent you two too young for sex?” Luther questioned, gesturing between the boys.

 

Grayson only shrugged, “I don’t think so.”

 

Five sunk back into his chair, “It’s really not a big d-”

 

 “I didn’t even know you knew what sex was?!” Dave interjected before Five could even begin to form a sentence.

 

“Well it’s kinda obvious that he does, Dave-o,” Diego chuckled at Dave’s baffled face before leaning over to whisper in Five’s ear,  “Soooo, was he any good?”

 

Five smirked his signature smirk as he whispered back, “The g-goddamn best.”

 

That got a deep laugh out of Diego which, in return, scared Klaus even more.

 

“Oh my god, my baby isn't a baby anymore. Oh, christ on a cracker, Five. Where did your innocence go?”

 

“Did you two at least use protection?” Ben said between laughs.

 

Stammering as he spoke, Five rushed to answer before his dad had a heart attack, “Wha- yes! Of course!”

 

“Good, that’s, yeah, that’s good.” Dave sighed.

 

Klaus was freaking out and probably wouldn't stop till next year, “HE’S GROWING UP DAVE! IT’S NOT GOOD!”

 

Oh well, at least they think its only happened once.

Notes:

this was for snowflakewrites and snowflakewrites only.

Notes:

send in requests for oneshots!!

Series this work belongs to: