Chapter Text
To say the least, Peter Parker was terrified. If he were to elaborate, he would also simply say that he was terrified, because he was so terrified that he was unable to elaborate.
It has been a while since Tony Stark had come into his life, so long that he had trouble remembering life before he got home that one day to find Tony there, ready to whisk him off to Berlin. However, it had only been a couple months, three and a half to be exact, since he had formally met the Avengers. It hadn’t been until after the snap-surviving Avengers managed to defeat Thanos and bring back the missing half of the universe that Tony finally introduced him to the team. To this day, it was the fourth best day of his life (behind only the day, a week after the events of his homecoming, where Tony agreed to mentor him fully, resulting in frequent visits to his lab; that day in Berlin where he beat Captain America in a fight, and the day that Ned, MJ and him went to go see Sam Smith in concert at Madison Square Garden—in that order).
After the snap was reversed, all of the Avengers and team were gathered in Wakanda, celebrating. Tony and Steve decided that they had all been through too much to continue holding a grudge. Everyone was just happy to be alive, alongside their loved ones. That was all that mattered, so everyone was in good spirits and happy to see each other. Peter, who felt wildly out of place amongst all these big, strong heroes, was hanging close to the walls of the grand Wakandan gathering space, alongside the tree-like creature. Groot, was it? He wasn’t sure. He watched Tony talking with the rest of the Avengers. He didn’t feel comfortable walking over to him, nor did he think that Tony would want him to. He was having a good time with his friends, for the first time really, since the events of the Civil War, as the media called it. Why would he want a stupid kid to interrupt that? So he stayed where he was. Since the tree could only formulate the phrase “I am Groot”, Peter didn’t have to worry about appearing as socially lacking anyways. So it was all fine. It was. But then, Tony started to walk over to Peter, and consequently, Peter started to freak out. Naturally.
“Kid, what are you doing all the way over here? I’ve been looking for you. Got some people who I need to introduce you to, seeing as you’re an Avenger now,” Tony exclaimed in a matter-of-fact manner, placing his hand on Peter’s shoulder.
“B-but Mr. Stark… I-”
He was cut off. “Nonsense. Come along now, Barton is an impatient one.” With that, he was lead over to the group of scary Avengers. Tony introduced him, and to Peter’s surprise, they all looked excited to meet him. Him and Bruce hit it off immediately, with conversations upon conversations about scientific theories. Natasha snuck him a drink from the bar, with nothing more than a knowing glance. Her intuition was off the charts. And of course there were a few familiar faces, like Pepper and Dr. Strange, who it was nice to chat with in a non-life threatening situation. He was actually a pretty cool guy.
After that initial meeting, his relationship with the Avengers just progressed, and now could not be called anything less than familial. After the Infinity War, all of the Avengers decided that they wanted to make up for lost time, and the best way to go about that was to live together and train together. Everyone was on board. T’Challa needed to stay in Wakanda, and Clint and Scott needed to stay with their families, but they still visited and stayed over frequently, enough to have their own rooms, and rooms for their families. It was also the consensus to move back into the former Avengers Tower. They still kept the compound - it had its uses - but everyone wanted to stay centred in the city, for their various individual reasons.
In the months following, Peter, who still wanted to live with his Aunt May, developed a routine. He would say at the Tower every weekend, from Friday after school to Monday, where Happy (or sometimes even one of the Avengers!!) would drive him to school. As well, most weeknights he would head over for a few hours to do homework, help in the lab, train, or just hang out.
And Peter had never been happier. For the first time, he had a huge family who cared about him. And May. And his friends. He had all these good people in his life. Which is exactly why he was so fucking terrified to come out to the Avengers. He didn’t want to lose what he had come to have. His friends and aunt had known he was bisexual for years, Ned and May knowing before he even became Spiderman.
Coming out to the Avengers was never in the plan. He thought that he would be able to live a completely great life without them knowing. Despite his sexuality, he would never think to talk about his love life with them, so it really wasn’t a big deal.
Or so he thought.
As the weeks went by, he found it harder and harder to keep the secret. During movie nights, when comments were made about hot actors, he felt himself wanting to add his input, but he had to bit his tongue, because, wait, Peter, you aren’t out yet. When Ned and MJ were over at the Tower and they were discussing LGBT rights with passion, and an Steve walked in, he was compelled to abruptly change the topic. Or when he was looking at gay-ass youtube videos, or Tumblr posts on the couch, and Tony came over, he quickly muted the video or x-ed out of the app before he was asked about what he was doing. It was the little things like that which gradually made keeping the secret from them harder and more unbearable as time went on. So, Peter came to the conclusion that he had to come out. He knew that he had to, otherwise it would eat him up, but he also couldn’t bare the Avengers - even just one of them - or Tony especially - not wanting anything to do with him anymore. That too, would eat him up. That being said, he was all-around doing quite terribly.
What made it worse, though, was that ever since he decided to come out, the Avengers had presented him with ample opportunity. It was like they knew, and were setting the conversation up perfectly. It was pure and utter torture for Peter.
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It was a regular Saturday morning at the Tower. Peter went down to the common floor, to get some breakfast. It was about nine o’clock, so most of the Avengers were in the kitchen, save for Wanda and Sam who were undoubtedly still sleeping. Steve was over by the coffeemaker, pouring himself a cup. Nat was working away at a bowl of Cheerios at the table; and Tony sat next to her, ignoring the toast in front of him, instead opting for a cup or ten of coffee while Pepper lectured him on healthy eating habits. Bucky was lying on the couch nearby, watching cartoons, and Rhodey sat on the floor, since Bucky was hogging the whole thing. Bruce wasn’t present, probably because he was already down in the lab.
They all greeted Peter as he went to sit down, Steve promptly abandoning his coffee to make him some waffles, like he did every morning. God bless him, really. It was just then when Shuri burst in, T’Challa right on her tail. He forgot that they were visiting.
“Hello, you Americans,” Shuri called out in greeting.
Without thinking, Peter replied with an eyeroll, “I’m not American, I’m a lesbian,” in reference to the vine. Shuri immediately laughed. Vines were their thing. The rest of the group, however, did not get it. All heads turned to him. The waffle Steve had suspended on a spatula fell to the ground. Bucky even paused the TV.
“Peter?” Tony asked cautiously. “Are you okay?”
“I… um, well, um. I…”Peter scrambled for words as the sound of Shuri’s laughter continued to fill the otherwise silent space.
Thankfully, Shuri was able to compose herself enough to answer for him. “It’s a reference to a vine,” she explained. When the only response to her explanation was met with a continuation of blank stares, she tried again. “You know, the one where the sister tells her brother that she’s lesbian and he replies by saying that he thought she was American?” More blank stares. This time, she turned to Peter. “You really need to show your fam more vines. I’m disappointed in you, quite frankly,” she huffed.
“A vine is the short video thing, right?” Rhodey asked. “That video you showed me last week, the one about the guy dropping his taco, was a vine, right?” Shuri nodded, and Rhodey looked pleased to have conquered Gen Z pop culture.
“I’m glad that’s only what it is… I was concerned that I’d have to have a chat with you about that stuff,” Tony frowned.
Oh no. That must mean he isn’t okay with LGBT. Right? If he were an ally he would just laugh it off… Peter hoped he was just overthinking this. As he drifted back to reality, he noticed that the conversation had moved along, and he let out a breath he didn’t even know he was holding in. The bullet was dodged… for now.
And if after breakfast he cried a bit while Shuri rubbed his back comfortingly after confessing his fears to her, no one needed to know.
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It was Friday night the following week, and MJ and Ned were over at the tower after school. They were sprawled on the couch, watching Netflix. They were watching Stranger Things, because of his strong love for Steve. Great character development and a hot bod? Oui, si vous plait!
“That is so gay,” Peter exclaimed in response to the Steve-Billy shower scene. “As toxic a character Billy is, the sexual tension in that scene is undeniable, intended or not”.
Ned and MJ laughed in agreement, veterans to his gay humour. However, to their disappointment, the wifi decided to chose then to be problematic - the screen had paused to do the whole loading thing. Peter sighed loudly, “Oh my god, this is so homophobic!”
“Dudeeee!” Ned laughed, “Two gay-ass jokes in under a minute? You’re setting a record here, man.”
They high five, and MJ rolled her eyes. “Ned, I love you, but if you think that that’s Peter’s record, you’re sadly mistaken. Remember the time when we went to DragCon last year? Gay was the only thing spewing from his lips the entire afternoon.” She paused, before excitement flooded her face. “Oh my god, remember?” She whispered, for dramatic effect. “The hot dog vendor asked Pete what he wanted on his hotdog and he said - quote - Nick Robinson, please!” Peter laughed, remembering that joke fondly. It was his proudest moment.
Steve must’ve entered the room at some point, because not a second later Peter heard him say, “Slow wifi isn’t homophobia, Pete.” The moment interrupted, Peter turned around to see Steve frowning at him. “Homophobia is-”
Before Steve could finish, Ned piped up with a, “’Twas a joke, Mr. Captain America, sir!”
Steve was silent for a moment, but he was still frowning. At last he spoke up. “Well, it wasn’t funny. Also, referring to something as… you know… gay…isn’t appropriate. That word, you shouldn’t…” He trailed off, a frown on his face, and shook his head, as if he had decided that this wasn’t worth his energy. With that, he left the room.
“Don’t worry, Pete, he’s old. Old people just don’t get humour these days. I don’t think it’s anything more than that,” MJ tried to reassure him, but he wasn’t completely sold.
“I think Steve’s homophobic,” he voiced his concerns to May over dinner, the following Monday. “And Tony too…” he added as an afterthought.
“And, uh, what makes you say that?” She asked. “Those are some pretty bold accusations there, bud.”
“I know, but Steve said that-“
“He said he hated gay people? Or made any homophobic comments or jokes?”
“No, but-“
“Well,” May interrupted him again, “then you can’t know for sure. Just cause he’s from the 30s doesn’t mean you can make assumptions like that.”
“But what if he is? You gotta admit, with someone his age, the chances are higher…”
“Ask him. Tony too, and all the others, if you want. Find out. You don’t need to come out to do so.”
Peter stirred the soup in his bowl thoughtfully. May, as always, was right. It was time for a plan.
After finishing up the dishes, Peter all but threw the last dry plate into the cupboard as he reached for his phone.
“Woah, easy there, hun!” May commented from her spot on the couch, hearing the giant echo from plate clashing into the others, but not looking up from her book.
“Sorry May,” he replied hurriedly as he speed-walked into his room, dialling Ned’s number. He shut the door behind him just as he heard Ned’s hello.
The two sat on the phone for just about two hours, discussing the best - most awesome - way for Peter to go about this, without embarrassing himself, obviously. And when he hung up, he felt this new sense of confidence. Peter breathed a sigh of relief. This was gonna work.
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