Chapter 1: To become the villain's father
Chapter Text
One second he was leisurely watching Naruto on his laptop, and the next he was sandwiched between two warm bodies sans laptop. This was not something Kai had been expecting when he blinks. However, it didn't take his system long to process that there are strangers in his safe haven, in his bed, which resulted in him bolting, his misanthropic tendencies rearing its ugly head as he flees the room.
With his heart pounding in his ears and his lungs stuck in his throat, Kai leans his clammy forehead heavily against the wooden door, his trembling fingers working their hardest to lock it. He lost track of how long he just stood there panicking, his breathing harsh and his body drenched in a layer of cold sweat, but when he snaps out of it, he notices that he wasn't wearing his usual coffee-stained baggy tracksuit. They had been replaced by a... yukata? What?
A sense of unease fills him as he moves his sight towards his (wrong, wrong, wrong) hands, both scarred and heavily calloused; as if they were used to hard work. His mouth went dry when veins bulged easily the second he clenches these foreign appendages, experimentally turning them this and that way. Despite the excessive overlapping of scars, they were oddly beautiful, with slender digits and trimmed nails, resulting in them looking like fine pieces of jade. If not for the blemishes, he would have thought that these hands belonged to a hand model. When accessorized, eyes would undoubtedly be attracted to them.
Kai knew that he was disassociating pretty badly because of how absurd his 'escape from reality mechanism' was acting. But how could he not, when all he could think about was how fantasy-like his current situation seems to be? It somehow made him feel like he was a character in those stupidly addictive transmigration web novels. After all, how could an affluent shut-in such as himself develop such manly scars and callouses overnight?
Ripping his sight away from those hands, he quickly scans his surroundings. Maybe he could find a mirror to check if he was still himself or he had really... transmigrated into a body not his own.
The room he had rushed into, it seems, was a bathroom. It had the wooden style of those really old, traditional Japanese bathrooms, with a wide wooden bath dominating half the room, a wooden cabinet, and something that looked like a wooden bedpan - chamber pot? - near his feet. Kai couldn't help but blanch. There was no way a pampered young master like him could survive without indoor plumbing.
Despite being a hikikomori, Kai has a habit of staying sparkly clean. His house wasn't filled with trash since good hygiene meant a better quality of life, and a better quality of life meant a lesser chance of falling ill, which results in No! Doctor! Visits!
With his head cradled in his arms, Kai silently wept. If he had truly transmigrated, why couldn't he have gone to another modern alternate universe, or the future, or sometime after indoor plumbing was invented?!
... Wait a darny darn second.
Suddenly, dread filled his entire being as his thoughts broadened.
If there was no indoor plumbing... Could there possibly be no internet as well?
Kai suddenly feels faint and had to sit down.
Change his habits from urinating and defecating into a toilet bowl to a chamber pot? It might take a while, but he would get used to it sooner or later. However... To ask him to adapt to the lack of the internet? To the lack of computer technology? To the lack of anime? To the lack of online delivery?! Simply impossible!
Kai hasn't taken a step out of this house since he graduated middle school. Seeing that he is now a middle-aged man living off of his inheritance, it doesn't take a genius to put together that he has spent half of his life indoors. Food, clothes, toys, everything was bought online and delivered to his doorstep. Even then, there would always be one special instruction to the courier to leave his deliveries at the door and gtfo from his driveway so that he wouldn't have to interact face-to-face.
As if his body could not endure even the slightest thoughts of going outdoors, Kai's brain completely shut down and couldn't reboot.
... But that was the least of his problems.
As soon as his soul started to drift out from his lips, he felt a sharp and sudden pain radiate from his head.
His lips parted, but he couldn't even scream, his jaws locked achingly. All he could do was tug at his hair fiercely - anything to alleviate the pain. Memories not his own soon started to flood in, bulldozing into his mind with the recklessness and ferocity of a rabid dog. Slowly, he starts to understand that this body originally belongs to a man name Uchiha Tajima.
(He sees and experiences being born. Being named. Being wiped and showered. Learning how to talk. How to crawl. How to walk. How to run. How to hold a kunai. How to kill. How to follow all of his father's orders. To be married young. To father children when he was still a child himself. To be a shinobi. To understand what it meant to be an heir of the Uchiha clan. To watch impassively as the bonds between siblings shatter due to infighting. To die in the hands of an unknown poisoner at the age of twenty.)
When he came to, Kai was already on the ground, dazed, shivering, and feeling out of sorts; as if he had just had an out of body experience mixed with lucid dreaming. And much to his horror, he started to feel irregular bursts of pain and pleasure that Tajima had experienced throughout his life, from the top of his head to the tips of his toes.
In the end, he shakily reaches for the chamber pot and regurgitates dinner. Tajima's dinner.
To experience the life and death of Uchiha Tajima as if he was in a VR simulation, in first POV , could be summed in one word; wretched.
Chapter Text
It didn't take long for one 'Uchiha Tajima' to start to hyperventilate inside his bedroom's adjoined bathroom, curled in a tight ball with his face pressed against his knees and his two arms thrown haphazardly over his head; definitely not a position the original goods would ever be caught dead in.
But Kai couldn't help it; his future looks bleak from all angles. There were just too many factors in play that could cause this body an early death, and Kai just didn't want to deal with any of them all. His usual solution to any sort of problem was to ignore it until it went away (what the eye doesn't see, the heart doesn't grieve over), but with his current predicament, it would take a miracle for that sort of thing to work.
To list the number one concern of all bloody concerns; Tajima was an important figure in the clan, one of the leading candidates for the future position of clan head. That meant that everyone's eyes were on him, more enemies than friendlies. In addition to that, because of the political standing the original goods has with the clan, Kai would be forced to interact with people. Daily.
Insert shudder.
Kai, a person who suffers from anxiety disorders, would be like a trembling bunny whenever a wayward delivery man discards his special instruction to gtfo after placing the deliveries on his front door and knocks on his door. With his condition in mind, how was he supposed to interact with anybody?! He has no choice but to swallow this bitter pill ah!
All he could do right now was to pretend to be Tajima, lest everyone becomes suspicious of him and kill him under the guise of him being a spy, just to cut down the competition to the crown.
The only benefit(?) that came out of this entire mess was this body's residual memories. Those terrible, terrible memories. They showed him how to become Tajima, or at least, how to create a mask that could professionally impersonate Tajima.
Fortunately, in spite of those memories that were on repeat inside his head, it seems that he still retained his own personality, Kai's personality. He had thought that Tajima's memory would invoke some sort of change within him, but reality proved disappointing. It didn't do anything apart from frightening him to death!
(How could he possibly notice the gradual and subtle changes beginning to occur within himself? Without his knowledge, 'Tajima' had already taught him how to compartmentalize for now.)
Tsk, he hasn't done anything but panic, yet he already wants to return to Earth.
Sighing deeply, he performs deep breathing exercises.
Unexpectedly, it didn't take him that long to recover from his state of panic. Well, whatever. For now, he would go with the flow and try his hardest to adapt. He doesn't know if he would ever be able to go back to Earth, but he would stubbornly survive this stupid isekai, transmigration bullshit.
He uncurled from his foetal position and stood with shaky legs next to the bath, contemplating for a moment, before disrobing.
With the help of Tajima's brain and muscle memory, Kai performed a set of handseals and spat out enough chakra-made water to fill the bath, followed shortly by a small fireball, hot enough to instantly warm the water. Without further ado, he sinks into the tub and stares unseeingly at the ceiling.
Ok, first, let's calm down and prioritize.
At present, he could be at ease with the knowledge that he could manipulate chakra and perform jutsus just fine. That experiment pretty much proves that he was capable of doing anything that the original goods has learned prior to his body snatching.
Taijutsu, on the other hand, he was unsure about. Despite this being the original goods' body and having incredible muscle memory, Kai was currently the one seated behind the wheel. He doesn't know if he would be able to drive this body without complications during a fight or if he would be able to coldly run someone under his tyres-
Scrunching his eyebrows, he halts those train of thoughts and forces himself to adjust his mentality, easily ignoring the way the hot steam clung relaxingly to his flushed skin. Seeing that he would now be living in a war-ridden era, it was rather obvious what his answer should be.
"*When in Rome, do as the Romans do,*" he monotonously quoted in a soft whisper. Lifting a hand to eye level, he dispassionately watches as drops of water slowly roll down the pale and foreign forearm, "*Will I be able to do it? Heh. A pointless question. It doesn't matter... If I don't, I'll die.*"
He has read enough transmigration web novels to know that he needed to discard such 'modern Earth' way of thinking. Such naive thoughts would lead to nothing but his death.
In order to survive, he would need to learn how to compartmentalize; to compose himself as a person from this world, from this era. In addition to that stressful shinobi life, home life was equally as horrible. If he were to pull his punches, everyone in the clan would doubt Tajima's capabilities. For the sake of his future (for Madara's and Izuna's future), he couldn't allow that to happen.
To become the clan head in the Uchiha clan, there were conditions required to be met;
1) Only those who are born from the main branch can become candidates;
2) All five Elders will have to select an individual, out of all the candidates, to educate;
3) Upon the death of the clan head, the remaining candidates (up to five) will fight in a battle royale to determine the strongest.
With such a bloody and barbarian-esque tradition still ongoing to this day, Kai could only presume that because Madara was the strongest of his generation, he became the clan head as per canon and discontinued such practices after Konoha was built. However, before Madara, it had been Tajima (despite how faulty the original goods' personality had been).
That meant that Kai couldn't afford to show any weakness. From the original goods' memory, all of Tajima's brothers, uncles, cousins, and aunts were scheming bastards, and it was probably one of them who had poisoned the original goods, leading to Kai's soul to be trapped in this slag guy's body. If Tajima had been a decent bloke, Kai would've pitied him for such a tragic demise. Too bad Tajima was the scummiest scum he has ever had the displeasure of 'meeting'.
In the Warring States Era, it was kill or be killed. Kai, unlike the original goods, refuses to be the latter. If he needed to commit familicide to be crowned head of the Uchiha clan and ensure the survival of one of the most beloved antagonists in the Naruto series, then so be it.
Somehow, Kai finds it hard to swallow this sudden change of genre.
He was supposed to be transmigrated into a shounen anime, full of action and adventure, yet from the memories he received, all of Tajima's ridiculous family politics reminded him far too much of his guilty pleasure; clichéd historical themed Chinese dramas. Mostly about imperial families trying to one-up each other to become the Emperor, or those imperial consorts in the harem trying to gain the Emperor's favor by sabotaging their fellow concubines... or even killing the Emperor himself to become the Empress Dowager! Simply too terrifying!
He could only shake his head powerlessly at this strange comparison and bitterly prepare himself for a lot of schemes and mindfuckery from his fellow concu- candidates in the future. What a truly horrid future.
Even then, Kai woefully hopes from the bottom of his heart that he would never ever encounter such scenarios in real life. If he was forced to use such shameful 'concubines one-upping-the-other tactics' gained through watching those dramas, he wouldn't be able to reminiscence about the Naruto anime without historical Chinese drama tropes butchering and infecting everything. Way to ruin his childhood! Simply too hateful!
Rumble
Kai: "..." Brother stomach, can't you read the atmosphere? Why are you being disruptive at a time like this? Ai, truly embarrassing!
He facepalmed.
Forget it.
Since he was already up, he should get something to eat. No use brooding since it won't change his situation, anyway. When Kai deemed himself ready to leave the bath, skin all pruney and wrinkly due to the long soak, dawn has only just arrived, having spent the entire night in the bathroom.
After wiping his newly acquired body dry, he retrieves a fundoshi and awkwardly wears the old fashion undergarment with reddish cheeks, unsure of where to put his hands without being invasive. Although he was pretty much ashamed of touching another person's body without permission (not that Tajima could give it, mind), he couldn't help but scrutinize the chiseled yet slender body with envious eyes; truly a hateful slag man. No wonder all the green tea bitches flock to Tajima despite the man's married status.
Hesitatingly tugging at the fundoshi to assure that it won't suddenly come undone, he slips into a long-sleeved mesh armor next, going under a navy blue high collared mantle with the Uchiwa fan sewed at the back, the garment's sleeves long enough to hide the tips of his fingers. The last piece of Tajima's usual outfit was a pair of black pants, with bandages wrapped from the ankles up to the knees, making sure that the ends of the fabric would not flap and create unnecessary sounds when he walks.
After trying to futilely comb his hair down for a couple of minutes, fussing over how the top kept springing up much like a duck's butt, he angrily gives up on styling his hair and starts to pat himself down to confirm that everything was in place. With trepidation, he places a trembling hand on the door's handle, lips pursed as he encourages himself to officially meet Tajima's family, starting with his wife first.
What he encountered as soon as he stepped foot into his bedroom, however, left him cursing at his crow's beak. He has truly jinxed himself.
Character Status
Name: Liu Kai / Uchiha Tajima
Age: 35 / 20
Race: Chinese / Japanese
Circumstances: Transmigrated person currently in Narutoverse Warring States Era, received the original goods' memories
Goals: Flawlessly integrate into Tajima's life, become the clan head
State of mind: Miserable, unable to accept the change of genre
Standing within the clan: Prestigious
Standing within the household: Precarious
Standing within the clan's main branch: Pugnacious
Latest outstanding accomplishment: Had a panic attack the size of Mt Fuji, jinxed himself
Inner complains: "Why is there no indoor plumbing?!", "Why do I have dog shit luck?!"
Chapter 3
Summary:
Ying ying ying (༎ຶ⌑༎ຶ) the tears won't stop.
Chapter Text
If there existed a higher being in this world, then they must be sadistic fucks that have allowed their conscience to be eaten by stray dogs. Not only did Kai's first encounter with a resident in this world fall short, but it also proved that someone above finds his misery to be highly entertaining. He was going to raise a beautiful middle finger at them before going to bed tonight to show how unamused he was.
A pained groan interrupted his internal screeching and he twitched violently at the sound, his 'escape from reality' mechanism cut short in the face of overwhelming anxiety. He flails, reaching for a pocket and a cellphone that wasn't there, and it only made him panic more when he remembers his current whereabouts - where ambulance services were literally non-existent.
Fortunately, just as Kai was about to have one of the worst epic meltdowns in history, Tajima's cold hard instincts took over.
There were two women in Tajima's futon; pale, sweaty and frothing at the mouth. A split second was all it took for an inner switch to flip. Looks like it hadn't been just the original goods that got poisoned.
There was no time for his misanthropic tendencies to make an appearance once instincts took control of his actions. It felt as if all control had left him, as if he was hovering over Tajima's body and looking down at it as it made a mad dash towards the groaning women, meticulously counting their pulse whilst scrutinizing them for more symptoms that could help with identifying which poison was currently in their system.
Kai was confused at first when his new body suddenly stood up and ran, abandoning the women to their twitching and groaning. With the help of Tajima's shinobi education, however, it didn't take him long to connect the dots. He prays to Jashin he was wrong in his assumption. Uncaring about the roughness of his actions, he slams the shoji doors open on his way out, undoubtedly breaking them whilst at it.
As soon as he was inside his- Tajima's children's bedroom, he blanched. Two children were lying unconscious on the lone futon inside the room, and after taking a split second to confirm their identities using Tajima's memories, Kai once again flails. The two buns were having a violent seizure, frothing at their mouths like the two women, and having similar yet more severe symptoms.
Kai didn't hesitate to rush out of the house and dash towards the clan's infirmary, which was, fortunately, not far from their home. The healers startle at his loud and unexpected entrance, but he didn't care about his disheveled appearance right now; windblown hair, crazy eyes, and bare feet were unimportant in the face of saving Madara's and Izuna's lives. The Naruto series won't be fucking Naruto without its antagonists!
He can't remember what kind of jumbled alien speak he barked out, but his words were understood and it made two healers pack all of their equipment in a rush. Without further ado, they sprinted to Tajima's house post-haste, and when he anxiously calculates that they were moving too slow, he didn't care about men-women boundaries in this era and wrapped his arms around both the healer's waist, throwing them over his shoulders and speeding up.
They were compliant, only struggling for a few seconds before relaxing at his manhandling. He mentally notes to ask for their forgiveness after all this was over, knowing that his action was more inclined towards sexual harassment, no matter how pure his thoughts were.
As soon as he entered Madara's and Izuna's shared bedroom via the destroyed window curtesy of Kai's earlier loss of composure, the healers dropped to their knees by the children's bedside and started unpacking their tools.
Kai loomed and hovered behind them and got kicked out for being too loud in his fretting. Ok fine. He deserved that. It, however, didn't stop him from anxiously biting the nail of his thumb and pacing back and forth outside the bedroom door. It felt like half a day, but only half an hour passed before one of the healers came out and demanded to see the other patients.
Kai was then guiltily reminded of the other two who were still suffering in his room and quickly guided her there. The healer only gave a slight pause at the sight of Tajima's infidelity before she resumed her professionalism and proceeded to extract the poison. Whilst she did that, she began to educate him about the aftercare dos and don'ts of poisoned victims.
Kai's mind was too distracted, however. His primary focus lay solely on the children's health. He'd rather be there with them than remain here, listening to nothing but muffled white noise, to alleviate the anxiety he feels. Just as Tajima's manicured thumb was all but destroyed by his gnawing, he was startled into head jerking when the healer physically had to extract herself from the patient to hold his shoulders.
Breathe.
He needs to breathe.
Butshewastouchinghimletgopleasestoptouchinghim-
She, thankfully, took a step back and returned to treating the patients. He was able to breathe like a normal human again. Before he could flee, she spoke. It wasn't white noise this time.
"Tajima-sama. I'm doing my best at extracting the poison. However, they will remain in critical condition from overexposure. Furthermore, it is unfortunate that I am unable to do anything about their pregnancies. I'm afraid that the poison has circulated inside their bodies for too long, they've already miscarriage."
... Healing lady say what now?
Pregnancies? As in plural pregnancy? Tajima only has one wife, one! Not two! What the fuck. Scum! How shameless were you to not only demand a threesome but also impregnate your mistress in front of your unwilling wife?! Really too disgusting ah! A slag man through and through! Pei pei pei!
Kai wanted to vomit blood.
Sure, he has body dysphoria once in a while (he hates humans but he's human so yuck), but never to the extent of wanting to claw his own skin out. To be in the body of a fuckboy when in mind he was an asexual... Kai was beyond pale and had to bring up a hand to cover his mouth. He feared he would puke if he didn't.
"If I may be so bold... after I am done with treating them, will you allow me to check you for poisoning as well, Tajima-sama?"
Kai almost broke out in hives. He really, really didn't need this right now. "N-no, there's no need-"
The healer wasn't having it, however. She cut him off with a no-nonsense, firm tone, "There might be a chance that slow-acting poison had been used on you. Your skin has turned pallor and your forehead is covered in cold sweat."
"I'm fine-"
"I apologize, but I must insist that you allow me to check your health to avoid future problems!"
"I'd rather not."
"May I ask why?"
"... I don't feel sick."
"That's not an excuse."
Fuck. Whatever! He would agree and then flee. Pigs would fly before he ever complies with a medical checkup. To have someone else touch him? Fuck no. Gross.
"... Right. Fine. Is that all?"
"Yes, Tajima-sama. Thank you for your understanding."
"... Yeah. Sure."
With a grimace, he shuffles into the bathroom and shuts the door. Okay. Not a day into his transmigration and he had already fucked up Madara's BG plot. Great. Uchiha Madara was supposed to lose his younger brothers at war. Not infighting. What was he supposed to do now?
Kai buries his face into his palms and slides into a foetal position.
He fucked up.
He seriously fucked up.
If it had been the original goods, he would have realized sooner that his family had been poisoned along with him. If he had acted sooner, the two women would not have miscarried and Madara would have four younger brothers, not just Izuna. One of the two must have been carrying twins. Or he was forgetting something. But he was too distracted to think too much about it.
Even with Tajima's memories, Kai was inexperienced at dealing with interfamily feuds.
Okay. What's done was done. Time to brainstorm. The question should be; what can he do to set the plot back into place? Impregnate Tajima's wife three more times?
Kai's whole body broke out in hives just at the mental image of having sex with anyone. He was an asexual male with misanthropic issues. Just because he transmigrated into someone else's body did not mean he would have their sex drive. Sexual orientation differs from person to person. Personality differs from person to person.
He breathes.
That was all he could do right now.
Just breathe.
It took someone knocking on the bathroom door to snap him out of his misery. Exhaling, he grabs a copper mirror (which was ancient FYI). Better look the part of Tajima if he wants to live Tajima's life from now on.
The man that was reflected in the mirror made him gag, however. He had to swallow down the urge to laugh hysterically at the reflection's expression, which was almost unhinged. The short undercut bob was a mess and its pair of dark eyes crazed.
Kai uses his mantle's long sleeves to hide his trembling hands from sight.
Uchiha Tajima's features were aristocratic and handsome, looking no older than twenty. Damn if he hates how handsome the original goods was. How can someone with such a disgusting personality have such a beautiful outward appearance? God truly was hateful.
Biting his lower lip, Kai could feel a throb of indignant radiating from his heart.
His hair color, skin color, eye color, features, and ethnicity were all wrong.
Kai was supposed to have brown hair, darker skin, and hazel eyes. The reflection's, Tajima's, has black hair, pale skin, and black eyes. Its cheeks were filled and far too healthy without an ounce of undereye bags or dark circles that insomniacs have.
It was all wrong. Kai hates it. More than usual.
"Tajima-sama?" A feminine voice drifted into the bathroom, muffled by the door, but loud enough to startle him.
He grimaced, but one look at the reflection told Kai that he would need to work hard to suppress all facial expressions from ever appearing on this face. Uchiha Tajima looked barely sane as it was. A grimace made him look ready to kill. So, with a deep breath, he wiped his face clean of emotions.
For now, he should act in a way that did not scream 'imposter'. Shinobi were paranoid creatures on good days. So how would Tajima act in this situation? Tell the person to go away? Open the door? Grunt like Sasuke? He digs deep into his memory, both Kai's and Tajima's.
Kai may be an avid Naruto fan, but he knows next to nothing about Uchiha Tajima apart from him being a paranoid bastard who was also a child killer. And fanfiction portrays him either as a strict father or an abusive one. Kai, obviously, did not know how to act as a parental figure, and he refuses to be an abusive person despite his misanthropic tendencies. Refuses!
So how was Kai, an otaku (oh Jashin, he would be technology-deprived!) from the 21st century and far too dependant on the internet, supposed to survive in this era and act like a veteran shinobi who has probably killed more men than the average terrorist back at home?
Damn it.
Kai was very out of his element right now. But he couldn't just stay here all day long.
With that in mind, he takes a deep breath to calm his social anxiety, slips on a mask he now labels 'Tajimask', and opens the bathroom door.
A middle-aged otaku Kai may be, but he was first and foremost a notorious hacker. He has had his fair share of dealing with hot-headed crime lords and persistent cops (behind a screen, of course) so it was easy to fall back into that state of unsympathetic intolerance.
The person he meets as soon as he opens the door was a woman, no, a young teen who looked no older than fifteen, and gorgeous - with long dark hair that went past her hips, and wide, equally dark eyes that match her fair complexion beautifully. Worn on her body was an elegant, baby blue yukata with blossoming sakura patterns on it. It didn't hide the baby bump from showing.
Tajima's memory told him that this young lady was the original goods' concubine, one of the people living here that had not been poisoned, which was suspicious as hell, but he was not thinking about that right now(!).
Oh, fucking Jashin.
The original goods was truly shameless! How could he marry someone so young?! He already has a (poisoned) main wife and a(n equally poisoned) mistress. Why would he need another bed warmer?! And why couldn't he remember this young lady's name?!
Tajima, you truly are trash! Pei pei pei!
Despite his inner turmoil, Kai's gaze on her was steady and without infliction, watching as her facial expression morph from serene to shock to horrified to worry and back to serene in the blink of an eye.
He was curious about the rapid change of expression, but he put that to the back of his mind, for now, since he was more concerned about the bruises she bore on her person. From what he could gather from Tajima's memory, the original goods just had a night of rough sex with her. Like, really rough sex. As in, strangulation and extreme beatings.
Kai could already feel the tremors of his hands worsening, his anxiety rearing its ugly head. He felt like puking.
"What?" He asks after a minute of pregnant silence, his tone clipped and cold as he was fighting desperately to hold back the tremors he could feel crawling up his arms, shoulders, and neck. The woman flinches, ducking her head down.
The motion made her hair shadow most of her features. But it didn't quite manage to hide the fear he could see in her tearful eyes. Kai was the one who wants to cry the most, okay?! Oh, Jashin. If God wanted to throw his soul into Narutoverse, why did it have to be into Tajima's body? He would rather be transmigrated into a faceless, bystander character.
Kai wasn't sure how to portray himself as Tajima, but if characterization involves domestic violence, he was not going to continue even if it would be completely OOC of Tajima to suddenly change overnight. There was no way in hell he would hit a defenseless woman just to secure himself as Uchiha Tajima.
An immoral criminal Kai may be, but he was not a trashy wife beater. He may be unsociable and bad-tempered at times, but he was born in an era that supports women's rights and equality. He wants to cry right now!
"I a-apologize for disturbing you, Tajima-sama. But b-breakfast is ready. Will you be p-partaking with us this m-morning?" The young lady (he needs to somehow obtain her name politely) stutters, her tone conveying how clearly she fears Tajima.
Seeing how utterly terrified she was, Kai immediately shook his head. "No," he answered. His stomach wasn't in the mood, too.
The young lady discreetly breathed a sigh of relief. If he had agreed, she would have feared for her life. To quickly take her leave, she decides to move the topic to other more concerning matters. "T-there's a healer w-waiting for y-you in your office."
... Fuck. He forgot about that healer. Time to escape.
"Inform her that something came up. I'll be out of the house for the day."
Before the young lady could respond, Kai had already fled through the bedroom's open window.
Kai could only sigh.
Dear Jashin, please return me to Earth. I'd rather deal with incompetent colleagues than clean up Tajima's shit.
Of course, his wish wasn't granted and he could only gloomily explore his new home. He didn't look back even when he hears soft murmuring start after his departure.
What a shitty morning.
Character Status
Name: Liu Kai / Uchiha Tajima
Age: 35 / 20
Race: Chinese / Japanese
Circumstances: Transmigrated person currently in Narutoverse Warring States Era, entire family poisoned apart from one concubine.
Goals: Flawlessly integrate into Tajima's life, become the clan head. Additionally, to find out who poisoned Tajima's family.
State of mind: Miserable. Just miserable.
Standing within the clan: Prestigious
Standing within the household: Precarious
Standing within the clan's main branch: Pugnacious
Latest outstanding accomplishment: Nearly killed himself via overexposure to human contact.
Inner complains: "Why do you look like you want to cry? I'm the one who wants to cry oi!"
Chapter Text
Kai, with his misanthropic tendencies and social anxieties, was not surprised that his feet had landed him outside the clan's domineering walls. He felt suffocated within; the streets too crowded, backstabbers everywhere, and every single person seemed to judge him by his-Tajima's worth.
It was claustrophobic, and since all his happy pills had been left behind with his original body, he decided to risk running from his problems. Kai had subconsciously desired an escape, even if it was for a short moment, and escape his current body did.
The towering trees and mother nature, whilst intimidating to a city boy, was a breath of fresh air, away from humans and their issues. They gave him a safe space to think upon his next course of action. Additionally, it was a relief to leave the clan's protective radius. After all, in the first place, it had been an overly ambitious and opportunistic Uchiha who had almost annihilated Tajima's entire family.
Rather than fear the enemy outside, it was the enemy inside that should be feared. Barbarians, the lot of them. Kai would rather eat melons than get involved with the other concubines in the harem, though he highly doubted they would leave him alone even if he verbally surrendered his status as a candidate to the throne. A threat, even a potential one, would be eliminated by those paranoid barbarians. Palace politics were a pain.
Kai could not wait for Madara to grow older and become the clan head. That way, Kai could leave this clan for good. Maybe he could even aspire to become a novelist who travels in search of inspirations? The modern world had a lot of novels he ought to spread in this barbaric world. War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy, perhaps?
The Warring States Era would benefit greatly from quotes such as "one must believe in the possibility of happiness in order to be happy. Let the dead bury the dead, but whilst I'm alive, I must live and be happy", "all violent reforms deserve censure, because they can never do away with evil as long as men are what they are; and, therefore, it is the part of wisdom not to employ violence", and his personal favourite; "everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing themselves".
Ah, those were great quotes indeed.
Kai's feet only stopped when he came to the edges of his clan's land; the place where every Naruto fan back on Earth knew about. It was the infamous creek where two boys from opposing clans met and became friends, which led to the formation of the mightiest shinobi village to ever be created.
The place was... beautiful, in a solemn, ethereal kind of way, with mossy rocks on its bank and the sparkling waterfall that washed away the fallen blood from blades. It held many promises that would come to be, and many more promises that inevitably broke.
Kai wondered why he was even here. The land across from him was enemy territory. Any patrolling Senju could see him, a lone Uchiha without his weapon, and use this opportunity to kill one of their adversaries. It would be an unprovoked attack that would cause any modern, law-abiding citizen to shake their head at, but to the shinobi of this world, it was one less enemy to think about, one less threat to their loved ones.
Kai loathed their barbarian-esque traits, but he could not fault them for their bloodthirsty nature. From Tajima's memories, Kai knew that children were brought up as tools; their worth only as soldiers and/or birthing machines. It would take many, many generations for change to come. Kai knew the future, knew of the possibilities, the potential, but could he survive long enough to see such prospective amity happen in these lands plagued by war?
He brought his hands up. They were trembling. He clenched them, jaw set in determination.
Rather than cower away, Kai decided to use his fear as a factor in his survival. Fear would push him to exceed his limits. Fear would motivate him to survive against adversaries. Fear was good. Fear meant he would live to see another day.
That was why; "I can't run away, not anymore," he spoke aloud, determined.
Kai dropped his hands and allowed them to settle at his sides as he peered into the depths of the running waters. Tajima looked back, eyes cold and inscrutable. It was a good poker face, unbreakable and trained from infancy. They showed no disturbance, no emotions, even with Kai's inner turmoil and fear.
Just as he turned away from his reflection, Kai heard rustling leaves from his left. He twitched; muscles bunched up in paranoia and anticipation.
From all the fanfictions he had read, his mind automatically thought back to those rather cliché but addictive storylines. Would he see a boy with a bowl cut crawl out from the rustling bushes, or would it be an albino, or someone relevant to the plot? But no. Fiction was fiction, and this was reality despite how hard he wished otherwise.
A black kitten, crusted in mud and other unidentified substances, tumbled from the bush and landed haphazardly near Kai's feet. It appeared to be in a dazed state. Kai was an animal lover, hence his lack of hesitation when he crouched to pet it in search of wounds. The kitten did not react apart from releasing a confused sounding meow. It was adorable.
"Hey there, little one," Kai greeted with lips that wanted to curl into a soft smile but remained flat, facial muscles long paralyzed. "What're you doing all the way out here?"
It hissed, ears flat and fangs bared.
Fucking adorable.
Kai scooped the little thing up and checked its gender. A male. The kitten hissed and snarled louder but Kai was not fazed. He found it endearing, even.
"I'm keeping you," he decided on a whim. Animals were good for emotional support, and Kai truly needed a companion that would not backstab him during his moments of weakness. He did not doubt that he would have many, many mental breakdowns in the future.
The kitten stopped its struggles to stare at him with killer dark eyes. Weirdly enough, it reminded him somewhat of the adult, psychopathic Madara in canon. Especially with the kitten's flooffy porcupine-esque fur style that flopped over the right side of its face and grey fur lines underneath its eyes – which made it have the appearance of eyebags.
"I've decided. From now on, your name is Maou. Uchiha Maou." Even though the kitten was rather cute right now, he could tell that it would grow into a terrifying feline worthy of its name. An intimidating cat needed an intimidating name; hence it shall be called Demon King (and because Kai liked word plays; it also meant cat in mandarin).
Maou proceeded to kitty-punch him on the left cheek to show its discontent at his naming finesse.
Fucking adorable.
Sneaking back into the Uchiha compound with an uncooperative kitten unseen was a challenge and a half. Despite the difficulty, Kai succeeded, but with a lot of scratches and bites to his arms and his garment's sleeves. Giving the tiny creature a bath, on the other hand, almost took a year off his lifespan. At the end of the impromptu kitty bathing session, Kai ended up drenched, wheezing on his hands and knees, whilst a satisfied Maou was wrapped into a cat burrito. It was purring pleasantly at the sensation of the fuzzy towel against its whiskered cheeks.
Kai, who felt rather miserable at his drenched state, became a puddle of goo at the adorable sight.
Cats truly heal one's soul.
Whilst his face remained impassive as per usual, Kai felt contented and blessed to have met his furry companion. If he were in an anime, his aura would be emitting fluffy bubbles and flowers right now. Chuckling softly under his breath at the irony of such thoughts, Kai continued to rub the naughty feline dry. Maou turned out to be a Maine Coon underneath all that mud and dirt, which was a pleasant surprise for Kai, who has always preferred bigger cats. Truly a king worthy of its imposing name.
After both human and kitten were dry, Kai struggled to calm the kitty enough to carry it in his arms, and although that took ages, he managed to exhaust the kitten enough to stop it from continuously biting his arms. Leaving his private bathroom, he brought Maou with him as emotional support to visit Tajima's, no, Kai's sons. They were his. Not Tajima's, not anymore.
When Kai entered the modest-sized bedroom, his dull eyes zeroed onto the unconscious children, both sickly pale as they continued to breathe shallowly underneath the covers of their futon. Too preoccupied with his own thoughts, Kai did not notice how Maou had stilled at the sight of the boys, ears flat on its head in shock.
It took effort for Kai to unlock his feet and move to sit next to the boys' shared futon. Despite having already acknowledged these two instant sons to be his, he was still a misanthrope deep within. His hand hovered over Madara's sweaty forehead, his expression twisted between disgust and affection. In the end, Kai's hand retreated as his feelings of disgust won. His arms were covered in goosebumps at the simple idea of touching another human. Kai was disappointed with himself and turned away.
Kai knew he needed to get used to being touched and touching others. But not today. He had enough of today.
"I am not ready to be a father. I do not want to be a father," Kai whispered, feeling lost and helpless. He would have never admitted such things aloud in front of Madara or Izuna, but he was assured that the two children were truly unconscious to confess his true feelings. He gently patted Maou, its soft fur working its magic at calming his erratic heartbeat. "But I'll try. I promise to protect the both of you from… hah, my brothers and sisters, I suppose. I guess I should start preparing meals for us. Rather my poor cooking than poison, right?"
Kai was rueful as he hugged his feline companion closer to his chest, eyes clenched shut and face pressed against Maou's furry body. When his shoulders began to tremble uncontrollably, and if a patch of Maou's fur had turned wet, only Kai would know. Kai allowed this moment of weakness to play out, as come tomorrow, he would be alone in his battles against his fellow candidates.
Character Status
Name: Liu Kai / Uchiha Tajima
Age: 35 / 20
Race: Chinese / Japanese
Circumstances: Transmigrated person currently in Narutoverse Warring States Era, found a kitty companion
Goals: 1) Become the Uchiha clan head. 2) Find out who poisoned Tajima's family. 3) Start exposure therapy. 4) Learn how to cook
State of mind: Still miserable.
Standing within the clan: Prestigious
Standing within the household: Precarious
Standing within the clan's main branch: Pugnacious
Latest outstanding accomplishment: Catnapped a kitten so that he can cry into its fur
Inner complains: "Why are all of Tajima's siblings so murderous?"
Chapter 5
Notes:
[Chapter Warnings: Mentions & descriptions of child abuse]
Avoid [brackets] if you'd like to skip those parts
Chapter Text
Dinner was the worst Kai had in a long while.
Even Maou, who was only an animal and should know no better, seemed to judge him for his poor culinary talent – or lack thereof. The disdainful glares Maou released upon his person was painful as it drilled harshly into the side of his head. He gave the kitten, who was in a cat loaf position, a poke on its pinkish nose. The glaring intensified, which considerably cheered his mood. The more ferocious and contemptuous Maou acted, the more Kai found it too irresistible to not tease and make fun of. The delights of owning a pet, as most owners would say.
Done with his teasing, for now, Kai turned back to his... meal(?). Whilst inwardly crying tears of blood, he shoved a spoonful of burnt congee down his throat. Better burnt food than a night with an empty stomach. The congee was more charcoal than anything, but it was still edible, though the taste was dreadfully indescribable. He barely chewed before he swallowed, unable to bear the taste further lest he gagged.
How Kai had failed at making something as simple as fish congee was a mystery. To all his Chinese brothers and sisters out there, he sincerely apologizes for this disgraceful attempt. He did not even know that congee could get so... blackish and hard. It was like chewing on bricks, even the slices of fish meat in it tasted like ash.
Fortunately, Kai had been smart enough to set aside a bowl of fish meat before his attempt. If not, Maou would have starved on its first night living with Kai. He had a feeling that if Maou was dissatisfied and wanted to leave, there was nothing he could do to stop it. Oddly enough, although Maou was just a kitten, it had a presence that could not be disregarded. Kai would not be surprised if Maou turned out to be a kitty with the potential of a nin-neko. Maou was that badass.
Once they were done with their dinner, Kai began washing the dishes with Maou nimbly balanced on his shoulders, claws deliberate as they dug into his flesh occasionally. He pretended to be oblivious to the way Tajima's concubine (whose name he still did not know) had skirted past the kitchen multiple times this evening. She was probably waiting for him to finish so she could start her own dinner preparations.
Kai did not know if he was lucky Tajima's concubine did not join him or unlucky that she did not even ask to join him. Maybe she could have given him tips on how to not burn congee – but alas, he was probably asking too much from her. Kai did not want to stress her and risk a miscarriage. Who knows, maybe she was carrying triplets? One could only hope.
When he was done with the dishes, Kai wandered the dark house for hours, mind a turmoil of framework, plans, and contingency plans, until Maou pawed at his cheek. "What is it?" He murmured, lips brushing inadvertently against Maou's soft, furry flank when he turned slightly to face the kitten still on his shoulders.
It meowed, before jumping onto the wooden floors and swaggered away as if it owned the place. Kai, bemused, followed the arrogant feline at a sedate pace. Apart from Tajima's routine stretches before bed, it was not as if Kai had anything pre-planned after dinner. Tomorrow was when Kai would begin his counterattack against Tajima's rotten extended family, and nothing but sleep was on his agenda tonight.
Maou stopped in front of the children's bedroom, pawing cutely at the shoji doors. The kitten was looking expectantly at him with Puss in Boots eyes. Kai, pretty much putty in its paws, did as commanded after a few more moments of persistent pawing.
Maou rushed inside, and after shutting the shoji doors behind him, Kai was slightly surprised to see his feline companion curled into a cat bun at the crook of Izuna's neck. Maou did not seem like the type to sleep with a stranger, but there it was, purring as it licked Taji- Kai's youngest son on his cheek.
The sleeping children, at least, looked healthier now after receiving medicine and care from the healers. There were half-eaten bowls of cold congee at the head of the futon, giving him a picture that Tajima's concubine must have delivered them their dinner whilst he was wandering the halls like a ghost.
It made him sheepish – he had kind of forgotten about his instant sons and their nutritional needs. The next time, Kai planned to overlook her cooking process since he could not ban her from the kitchen entirely (she'd die or miscarriage if she ate his food). It would not do for the primary suspect of their previous poisoning case to have access to the children's meals. That was just asking for trouble.
Kai hesitated for a moment before he retrieved a spare futon in the wardrobe and placed it next to the children's, though with a huge gap in between. It was better to remain by their side, for now, just to discourage any future attempts at getting rid of his heirs, and just in case they have already ingested poison a second time.
With a sigh, Kai stood next to the previously broken window and started Tajima's routine stretches. When he was done with that, he sat in a lotus position and meditated. Fortunately, this world's genre did not change much power-wise. If he had to cultivate a golden core in Narutoverse rather than practice chakra control, Kai would have drunk himself into a stupor from sheer exasperation.
After an hour of peaceful meditation filled with nothing but the sound of multiple soft breathing, he tried to sleep. Try, being the keyword. Kai was an insomniac, and it seemed that even transmigration has not fixed that unfortunate condition of his. And here he was, hoping for at least something good would come from changing bodies. But no, the author of his life forbid that he get a solid eight hours of sleep like the rest of humanity.
He sighed.
It was going to be a long night with neither phone nor computer to keep him entertained.
Kai left the children's bedroom when the sky was still dark, futon tucked away, and any evidence of his presence gone. He also discarded the bowls of leftover congee after he came back from relieving himself. Additionally, he left a small gap between the shoji doors for the kitten's future use if needed.
Maou was not a happy camper as it sulked in his arms, clearly angry at him for disturbing its rest. Unfortunately, as much as he enjoyed seeing Maou be enamoured by his instant sons, Kai did not want to clean cat piss off his tatami mats. Also, he did not wish to alarm the kids when they wake up to Tajima's emotionless/scowling mug in the morning. It would have given them a heart attack.
In Tajima's memories, the original goods did not hold even an ounce of paternal affection for his children. If he was not ignoring them, he was beating the shit out of them in the name of education and training. To any educated modern person, what Tajima did was more child abuse than discipline, more violence than punishment, more blackmail than reprimanding.
Tajima held unreal expectations for his children, even from Izuna who was only two years old.
[("Are you daft?" Tajima sneered, sharingan eyes spinning as he glowered at the incompetent child he calls a son.
Izuna was trembling on the floor as he held his swollen right cheek, not daring to raise his gaze. The newly acquired reddish bruise covered half his face, colouring his skin, already an ugly shade of purple and blue from previous lessons, with splotches of crimson. "
Tajima snorted, unimpressed by the child's silence. "Again. This time, you better enunciate properly. Or else..." He warned, his left hand already twitching as he prepared to strike this pathetic excuse for a son. "If only you had half your brother's talent, I wouldn't have to go through such length to educate you."
Izuna's trembling only worsened at the dismissive remark as his shoulders hunched, appearing completely defeated.)]
Everything, from talking to walking, the original goods demanded absolute perfection. If Izuna stuttered, lisped, or talked too slow for his liking, the child would get punished. If Izuna stumbled, accidentally dropped his kunai, or even held his chopsticks wrong, Tajima would give him hell.
Kai was thoroughly disgusted with Tajima's behaviour. In all honesty, which bloody two-year-old could enunciate their words perfectly and walk as if they were grace incarnate? Ridiculous. Toddlers were still learning, they make mistakes, it was nothing unusual. And to compare him to his own brother? No, just no. Child services would have a field day if they were back on Earth.
At the rate Tajima had been going, Kai would not be surprised if Izuna grew up hating his father and brother. Who loved getting compared to their more talented older sibling? Fortunately for them (and unfortunately for him), Kai oversaw their education and training now since Tajima was out of the picture.
Kai grimaced at the reminder. He wasn't sure how he was going to fix their father-son relationship enough to train them without Madara and Izuna fearing for their lives. The children were terrified of Tajima, this body and this face, and he did not want to act OOC by being all chummy with them. Besides, Kai wasn't a friendly person by nature, too hateful of humanity to open up to anyone, much less to children.
Soon enough, Kai's musings were cut short when he entered the backyard, big enough for shinobi training.
Although he has the original goods' recollection of training here every day, the sight still made him pause and inhale a lungful of unpolluted fresh air. Kai used to live in a studio apartment in the city. His balcony was the only place that connected him to the outside world, and metal towers were the norm. This much greenery almost felt surreal.
Kai currently stood on the engawa, and in front of him was a traditional Japanese garden. There was an artful combination of trees, flowers, rocks, and water. The pond was massive in size, with a stone bridge situated in the middle, and Kai could see koi fishes of varying shapes, colours, and sizes idly swimming in the waters. The plants and flowers looked well cared for, and there was even a small rock garden at the edges, well suited for meditation purposes.
Whilst Kai continued to admire the view, Maou seemed to have had enough. It grumpily used his chest as a springboard to jump from his arms. As soon as its paws touched the grassy ground, Maou zoomed behind a tree and out of sight, probably to answer nature's call. Kai amused himself by thinking of Maou's reaction if he followed but shook such mischievous thoughts away. Better not anger the flooffy kitten further (more than he already has, anyway).
Leaving the kitten to entertain itself on its lonesome, Kai walked to the open area and started to routinely perform the original goods' katas. He was not one to exercise or Jashin forbid sweat, but if he wanted to continue Tajima's shinobi career, he must keep this body in tip-top condition. Sacrifices must be made, and in this case, it was his laziness and inactivity.
By the end of his morning training session, the sun has risen, and Kai's was bent forward, hands on his knees, flushed and covered in perspiration. His clothes stuck disgustingly to his skin and his hair was damp with sweat. He grimaced whilst straightening, using the hem of his sleeves to wipe the moisture from his forehead and neck. Running a hand through his hair, Kai decided a shower was urgently required.
"Maou?" Kai called out, curious if the kitten was still here (and if it would answer to the name Kai had given).
When Maou suddenly jumped off a tree branch and landed on his shoulder, Kai could not help flinching at the unexpected weight and warmth. He took a deep breath for four seconds, held it in for seven, and exhaled for eight, extending a hand to pet Maou on the head, an unconscious gesture at self-comfort to bring his elevated heartbeat down. He repeated the 4-7-8 breathing technique a few more times before he was able to relax his tensed muscles.
That almost scared the shit out of him. For a second there, he had believed the genre had changed to horror. Naruto was scary enough, action-wise, without hungry ghosts and vengeful spirits added into the mixture, thank you very much.
"Go keep the children company," Kai suggested after a moment of petting, tone unconsciously flat, much to his inner exasperation.
Tajima's poker face, from what he has learned thus far, extended to his vocal cords at times. Tajima has two default settings: a mean resting bitch face with a curt tone, or an emotionless one with a monotone. If Kai were not actively showing his good mood, it would fall as either one of the two passive states. He withheld a sigh and gently set the kitten on the engawa. With one last pet on its furry head, Kai hurried to his personal bathroom.
Thankfully, he did not encounter any of his other household members during his short trip to the bathroom.
Cleaned and garbed in Tajima's usual get-up, Kai's feet soon brought him to the kitchen as his stomach growled in hunger. He stopped short at the entrance, unable to proceed further when he spotted three familiar people seated at the connected dining area. They had instantly frozen, facial muscles tensed and breaths shallow when they saw him appear, akin to statues than anything living. It was as if they did not want to attract the attention of a predator.
If this were a visual novel, Kai would have returned to his previous save point and stayed far, far away from the kitchen. He would have waited until they finished their breakfast before making his own. However, reality did not work that way. He has two options. Either one, suck it up and enter, and in turn cause both parties to be uncomfortable, or two, pretend to be dissatisfied and leave.
It was a no-brainer.
Kai, who was about to pick option number two, was stopped short when Maou approached him from in between Madara and Izuna's seated form with a small bowl in its maw, the one Kai had previously used to feed it dinner. He heard a terrified squeak from the youngest at the table and saw small hands outstretched as if to grab the nimble kitten and hide it from his eyes.
Kai resisted the urge to pinch the bridge of his nose. Trust Maou to be difficult at the most inconvenient of times. The original goods would have kicked the feline away in disgust, but Kai, although he did not want to appear OOC, was ultimately not an abuser – to both animals and humans (despite his misanthropic tendencies). He scooped the kitten into his arms, bowl and all, and walked to the kitchen counter.
Ignoring the frightened eyes on him and the tension in the air, Kai dropped a whole dried fish that was as big as Maou into the bowl and carried them towards his instant sons. The two trembled under his gaze and their eyes were focused solely on the low table, too frightened to look at Kai's approach.
It was discomforting to see how deeply rooted the fear of their father was, but Kai was determined to prove himself harmless. This was the first step towards a more amicable relationship with his instant sons. It was understandably uncomfortable for both parties involved, one because they feared for their lives, and the other because he was a misanthrope. But it needed to be done.
Kai was careful to show no unexpected movements when he crouched in between the boys and gently placed Maou, along with its bowl, on the floor. He did not miss how both boys flinched, so he slowed his movements, making them more obvious and purposeful with no signs of hostility.
A moment of hesitation, Kai spoke, terse, "This is Maou. He is our new family member."
Whereas five-year-old Madara seemed to waver between elation and fear as he peered hesitatingly at Kai through long lashes, two-year-old Izuna was bolder as he blinked innocently at Kai, big eyes filled with hope as they met his narrowed, impassive ones.
Without waiting for a response from his instant sons, he seated himself at the head of the table – to Madara's right and the left of Tajima's concubine – and turned to the latter. He loathed how expectant he must act in front of them; he would rather cook and fetch his own breakfast, but in this era, it was expected for women to do such chores for men. So, Kai waited, uncomfortable with the proximity of human contact and this world's gender inequality.
It did not take long for a bowl of rice, miso soup, and dried fish to appear on the table in front of him. Kai mentally gave her his gratitude whilst grabbing his chopstick. Damn original goods with his lack of manners. It was only after Kai had tentatively taken the first bite of his meal (cautious of any further poisoning attempt) did the rest of the household at the table continue theirs. He kept his eyes solely on his meal, and that seemed to relax them some, at least enough to not choke on their food.
... Kai could not remember the last time he ate together with another human. His social anxiety made his throat tighten uncomfortably with every swallow. The urge to puke intensifies.
Unsurprisingly, breakfast was a tensed and silent affair, and Kai loathed every second of it. Never will he voluntarily go through this torture again. Never.
Character Status
Name: Liu Kai / Uchiha Tajima
Age: 35 / 20
Race: Chinese / Japanese
Circumstances: Transmigrated person currently in Narutoverse Warring States Era.
Goals: 1) Become the Uchiha clan head. 2) Find out who poisoned Tajima's family. 3) Start exposure therapy. 4) Learn how to cook. 5) Form a bond with Madara & Izuna
State of mind: Tense and anxious
Standing within the clan: Prestigious
Standing within the household: Precarious
Standing within the clan's main branch: Pugnacious
Latest outstanding accomplishment: Managed to not barf whilst eating breakfast with three people who hate & fear him
Inner complains: "Can I please move out? I want to live alone. Living on my own is the best."
Chapter 6: The abyss gazes back
Summary:
Kai has a feeling he'll be intimately acquainted with stressed induced IBS at this rate.
Chapter Text
In the comfort of Tajima's office and secured behind closed doors, Kai had his eyes clenched shut, lips pursed against intertwined fingers and elbows balanced atop the only mahogany floor desk present. His complexion was ghastly, with pinched eyebrows and beads of cold sweat clinging unpleasantly on his forehead and neck.
Indigestion caused by anxiety and stress was a miserable thing to experience, Kai bemoaned. Breakfast sat horribly inside his stomach, heavy and disagreeable, and Kai could not even pop a couple of digestive pills to aid him with digestion. Why did he have to transmigrate into a body that was born in this time period, where remedies came in the form of herbs, roots, and barks rather than genetically and chemically engineered drugs?
Less than 48 hours and Kai was already missing modern Earth. He had not realized how privileged he had been until he was yeeted into Narutoverse during the Warring States Era. Although he loathed Boruto and what it represented (Naruto, a neglectful dad? No, just no), he would rather be transmigrated into a body born in that era despite knowing nothing of the plot. They have electronics and technology such as computers and gaming consoles, at least!
After a brief period of lamenting, Kai's stomachache lessened considerably enough for him to concentrate on other more important matters such as Tajima's current situation and duties.
Kai cracked an eye open. Stacks of scrolls and a mountain of paperwork greeted him. His stomach rolled in despair and he had to squeeze his eye shut again to fight off the twinge in his abdominal region. Yeah, no. It would not be Tajima's relatives that killed him one day, it would be his extensive workload and stressed induced irritable bowel syndrome.
Kai took a deep breath for four seconds, held it in for seven, and exhaled for eight. He repeated this breathing exercise until his anxiety lessened somewhat and he could finally function like any other decent human being. He reached for the first scroll of the day and began to fulfil the administrative part of Tajima's responsibility. No point delaying the inevitable.
As the most promising candidate out of the five eligible heirs, Tajima oversaw mission allocations. And whilst allocating, he was constantly vigilant of sabotage attempts from his fellow concu- heirs and other relatives pining for his prestigious position.
As the person who took over Tajima's body, Kai knew to keep an eye out for foul play, which dropped his efficiency tenfold and brought forth counter productiveness.
He abhorred how dumb the other heirs were behaving; they were putting the cart before the horse, and their supporters oblivious to their harmful ploys. If he were to accidentally allocate a mission to the wrong person or team due to false or forged information, it would hurt the clan's reputation more than his.
Furthermore, it has the potential to reduce their manpower if casualty arises, which could prove fatal to the Uchiha clan's continual survival, especially when it concerns their current state of stalemate with their archnemesis. Any indication of weakness and the Senjus would readily pounce on them before they could even finish wiping their own asses caked full of shitty mistakes.
Such heirs were unfit to be leaders if they could not even discern that their greed was endangering the masses they were obligated to protect. They overestimate themselves and underestimate how desperate their enemies were; their short-sightedness appalling, akin to the mantis that stalked the cicada, unaware of the oriole behind.
The current members of the Uchiha council, the five elders especially, have remained in the position of power for far too long, their greediness extending to their successors, and they were stagnant, their views conservative. They needed to be replaced; it was common sense back on modern Earth for every man or woman who was in a position of power to not stay in the office for too long as absolute power corrupts absolutely. There were systems and protocols to prevent corruption, though some stubborn politicians tried to find loopholes around them. After all, nothing was foolproof.
Sighing, Kai shook his head and got to work. The shinobis would be trickling into his office soon enough and he would rather get a head start. There was no point lamenting about how backwater and barbaric this clan's governing system was. It was not as if he planned to change them, anyway, since he was far too busy trying not to get himself and his instant sons killed by overly ambitious relatives.
The first shinobi came not long after Tajima's concubine left a tray full of assorted wagashi and a pot of hot tea on the tatami mat to his left. Kai eyed the sweets and steaming cup of tea warily, unsure if they were safe for consumption or if they could be considered his last meal. What an experience, to mayhap live with someone who wanted him dead at all costs. He should start an investigation on Tajima's concubine soon; he needed to know if she had been bribed and who the mastermind was.
"Kazue reporting for duty, Tajima-sama."
Kai disregarded the refreshments and quickly dug into Tajima's memories. Five seconds passed and Uchiha Kazue, 21 years old, above average in melee combat, specializes in stealth, not trained for bodyguard duties, has rested sufficiently for a hazardous and gruelling mission was retrieved from Tajima's memory chamber. Nodding, Kai picked a specific scroll, double-checked its contents for any sabotage, and handed it to Kazue, making sure that their fingers would not brush against the other even by accident. It was a copy, as the originals were needed to be kept safe as records.
Kai wet his lips, slightly nervous. This was the first person he would converse with outside of 'family'. Even if it was for a short moment, his heartbeat still skyrocketed. He hid his trembling hands inside his billowing sleeves and stared stoically at the man half kneeling in front of his desk.
"Our client, a concubine in the daimyo's harem, hired a hit. Make sure your affiliation with the clan remains unidentifiable, your identity must not be compromised at all costs; we cannot afford to deal with their court politics. She desires it to be clean and swift, an in-and-out job, but do not use poison. Once you finish, remain in the capital for three days, do whatever you want, think of it as a vacation, even. On the third day, meet her maidservant at the location written inside the scroll for collection of payment. Burn it after you have left the compound and memorized its contents. Questions?"
(It hit a little close to home, this one. Was the universe trying to tell him something?)
During Kai's monotonous briefing, Kazue unrolled the scroll and skimmed its contents, confirming the client, the target, and her requests. Once the latter was done, he nodded and pocketed the mission scroll.
"None. I have received your orders and shall take my leave now, Tajima-sama."
"Yes, return safely, Kazue-san."
"I will return in a fortnight."
The shinobi bowed one last time in respect and strode out the door at Kai's dismissal. Kai did not even get a minute breather from social interactions as the next in line entered a second later. This time, it was a group of returning shinobi with their mission report scrolls in hand. Kai withheld a shudder at the crowd and their proximity, his social anxiety spiking tenfold. It was most fortunate that Tajima's poker face and discipline surpassed Kai's need to flee.
"Team 4 returning from a successful escort mission, Tajima-sama."
"Welcome back, team 4." Kai received their scrolls and a pouch full of coins whilst asking, "Any complications during the mission?"
"None," the leader of the group answered on their behalf. "The clients have not been harmed, our members have shallow injuries at most, and the full payment has been received."
He skimmed their reports and pulled out the original mission scroll to double-check. Everything seemed to be in order. "Good work. Here are your earnings. Your team will be off the mission roster for a week, be sure to rest."
"Thank you for your consideration, Tajima-sama. We will be taking our leave now."
The morning went by in that fashion but the pile of scrolls on his desk seemed to never diminish. He blamed it on Tajima's aid (Uchiha Kaen, thirty-two, crippled at twenty, loyal to Tajima who provided him with this job) who continued to replace every one scroll with two more.
When afternoon arrived, Kai could not be more grateful, his nerves shot to the high heavens. Tajima's mission allocation office closed at one o'clock on the dot daily, and only urgent missions would see his doors open after hours. Stretching to a stand, he welcomed the relief it brought to his rear end. If he had to do this every day, he would not be surprised to see pressure sores on his sacral region one day. And maybe haemorrhoids too. The floor cushion hadn't helped in the slightest.
The next on his agenda was lunch, followed by Madara and Izuna's training. Kai grimaced; he was not looking forward to both. He gave the untouched refreshments one last, parting glance before making his way to the kitchen. He was parched from all the talking, but he would not risk drinking the tea even if he were dehydrated. He would ask his aid to prepare the refreshments starting from tomorrow.
This time, he made sure that the kitchen-dining room was empty prior to entering.
Maou was the only one present, lounging lazily next to the stove. There were some inconsistencies with the furniture in this world, a mixture of modern and historical; but Kai has long come to accept Kishimoto-sama's Narutoverse oddities and left them alone.
The stove was akin to a ceramic cooktop but rather than run on electricity, it was run by heating seals. Kai was unsure of the exact details pertaining to this appliance, but convenient things should be left unquestioned anyway. That was Kai's modern Earth mentality, and it would have undoubted driven scientists and researchers (couchTobiramacough) mad if heard.
Idly patting Maou on the head as he passed by, which earned him an irate growl, Kai began looking through the fridge (a rectangular cabinet made of bricks that had cooling seals inside) for available ingredients. He ignored the meal already prepared by Tajima's concubine and started cooking the most basic of dishes a Chinese man could make; fried rice with egg.
Maou, once again, judged him for his lack of culinary talents and turned its nose up at his finishing product. Kai's onyx eyes were blank as he gazed into the abyss (burnt fried rice) as the abyss gazes back.
... It was fine. It might look inedible, and the taste might be indescribable, but Kai would improve, eventually, and with practice.
He somehow soldiered through lunch after having deposited a handful of minced meat into Maou's feeding bowl. Both human and cat ate in silence, and once they were done, he briskly walked towards the backyard with Maou at his heels, mind already formulating a new training regimen for his instant sons. Hopefully, their relationship would improve enough to one day prevent patricide from occurring.
There would be no violence and harsh punishments, nor would there be verbal belittling and emotional abusiveness. Kai, although he absolutely hated the idea of being a father and was forced to accept his new paternal role, planned to become a good role model(?). Which meant he could not neglect them even if he would rather not see them. He was already mentally and emotionally drained from working at the mission allocation office.
When he coincidentally saw Tajima's concubine inside his bedroom taking care of Tajima's wife, Kai paused. Might as well solve the issue of food right now. He did not want to continue second-guessing his meals. He entered the room and cleared his throat; causing the pregnant teen to startle and drop the wet cloth she has been using to nurse the unconscious older woman.
"T-Tajima-sama!" She squeaked. It was followed swiftly by a subservient bow that nauseated him more than he would like to admit. "Is there something you need me for? Please, order me as you wish."
His hands that were hidden inside his flowy long sleeves balled, fingernails biting into the skin of his palms and leaving crescent imprints. She acted more like a slave than a concubine, which made his disgust for the original goods heighten to new extremes.
"From now onward, you will only prepare meals for yourself and..." Fuck, what was Tajima's wife called again? His silence continued whilst he desperately searched for her name within Tajima's memory bank. Finally, after his internal clock hit one minute, Kai lamely waved at Tajima's wife's sleeping figure. "You will not provide any sort of consumables for my sons and I, and you will only use the servant's kitchen, understood?" He finished stoically as if he had not paused in the middle of his sentence to awkwardly try and remember the sick woman's name.
He knew his orders were harsh, but he held no pity for someone who would poison even children and pregnant women. Guilty until proven innocent, as they say. Better safe than sorry.
Her eyes widened and her complexion blanched. She started to tremble and prostrate herself, forehead knocking on the tatami floors as she began begging for his forgiveness. If those were not a sign of guilt, he would eat his own socks. She didn't even try to deny it.
"Who?" Kai asked, onyx eyes frosty. He wanted to know who the mastermind behind the poisoning attempt was. She did not seem the ambitious and manipulative type. "Was it Hyouta-nii, Ikuma-nii, Suzuki-nii, or Inari-nii?" All who were Tajima's older brothers and fellow concubines in the harem. What was his life?
"I-It was me. Please, mercy, Tajima-sama, grant mercy, please! This foolish one did not know what came over me – to dare try and poison the father of my child, I must be sick in the head. Forgive me, please, mercy, Tajima-sama!" She continued to kowtow, banging her forehead to the tatami mats as if her life depended on it, which it did if the original goods had control over this body. Her action only made Kai want to leave. "Punish me as you deem fit, this foolish one deserves it! But spare me until I gave birth to our child, please, Tajima-sama!"
Alright, here goes nothing. He took a deep breath and prepared his mind to start exposure therapy.
"Do you take me for a fool?!" Kai sneered.
He pinched her chin with an index finger and thumb and forced eye contact upon her, his sharingan spinning intimidatingly. He withheld a shudder of disgust at having to touch her bare skin, almost wrenching his limb away. Fortunately, he managed to overcome such desires and continued to try and intimidate her into revealing the people behind the poisoning. He hoped that the sharingan's compelling properties would be enough to beguile her. He would rather not send her to the clan's T&I department even if she were guilty of aiding and abetting. After all, she was pregnant.
"Who gave you the poison, wench? I won't ask a second time."
When she continued to plead, ignoring Kai's mercy, the line between acting and reality seemed to fade, blurring in front of his eyes and creating a layer of frost in his soul.
He wanted this wench to hurt, to scream in pain, to beg for her life. For daring to lie to him. For daring to hurt the tools he made for his succession. For daring to tarnish his reputation. She needed to die.
He lost his patience and succumbed to mindless brutality.
His body reacted by unwittingly raising a hand high into the air. When he brought it down, just centimetres from violently landing on her cheek, Maou jumped onto his shoulders and hissed into his ears, loud enough to wake the dead. The shock factor made his entire body still, and the desire to hurt flushed from his system as he regained his bearings, feeling dizzy and disorientated.
Kai blinked. In front of him was a pregnant teenage girl, cowering and sobbing, huddled into herself as she babbled for mercy and forgiveness, to not hurt her please Tajima-sama, and Kai could only stare at his hovering hand. His expression was carefully blank.
Slowly, Kai rose to his feet. His muscles ached from how tensed he was, and although he could feel Maou's soft fur against his cheek, the feline rubbing its head against his as if to calm and comfort him, he was numb.
(What was that? What the fuck was that?!)
He left the bedroom without looking back. Leaving the house, he entered the detached building where his office resided. Inside was his aid, who was hobbling about using a crutch as he deposited a few scrolls onto one of the cabinets behind Kai's floor desk. At Kai's arrival, Kaen turned with a smile, before it dropped, a look of concern etched across his features.
"Tajima-sama? Are you alright?"
Kai's face remained eerily blank as he responded, voice devoid of emotion, "Launch an investigation on the concubine. I want to know all her movements from last year up until today. Move her to the servant's quarters and always have a guard on her. With effect from now, she is forbidden from leaving her room and seeing my children."
"If I may ask, what happened to have brought this?" Kaen carefully asked, even as he put aside the scrolls and began writing down Kai's order on a notepad.
"My concubine is under suspicion for poisoning my wife and children. Her attempt has caused my wife to miscarriage." Kai placed a hand on the doorknob, ready to leave. "And before I forget, send a maidservant to care for my wife. Let them prepare her meals until she recovers."
Kai left the compound entirely, his feet thoughtlessly bringing him to the place where he had previously found Maou. The kitten was in his arms, for once docile. Kai sat underneath a tree and curled into himself, hugging Maou closer to his chest. With his face hidden by Maou's fur, he was free to express the horror and dismay he was feeling.
Kai had just been about to physically punish a pregnant teenager. His body had moved on its own, the desire to execute violence concerning. If Maou had not stopped him, he would have beaten the concubine until she was black and blue. The revelation that he might be fusing with Tajima's barbaric personality was equal parts horrifying and disturbing. He did not want to be a cruel and abusive man. He didn't.
When the sun began to set, Kai compartmentalized his breakdown whilst forcing his limbs to move. Scratching Maou under its chin in silent apology for crying into its fur again, he carried the kitten back home and gently placed it next to the stove, where it sat quietly to watch him prepare dinner.
Kai did not have the energy to try and cook anything complicated, so he prepared egg fried rice again. The result was the same as his previous attempt, but he did not have it in him to care. After setting the table and depositing fish meat into Maou's feeding bowl, he waited for his instant sons to make their appearance.
An hour he waited with Maou, unmoving, and despite the kitten's pawing and meowing that he ate, he remained seated with no intention of moving. The two chakra signatures of his instant sons remained hidden outside the kitchen, equally unmoving. It took another hour before he finally picked up his chopsticks and began eating.
Kai was not disappointed at their absence.
"I'm not," he quietly insisted to himself. "Their fear is understandable."
Maou continued to watch him with unnervingly intelligent eyes, as if it knew he was lying.
He wasn't.
Character Status
Name: Liu Kai / Uchiha Tajima
Age: 35 / 20
Race: Chinese / Japanese
Circumstances: Transmigrated person currently in Narutoverse Warring States Era.
Goals: 1) Become the Uchiha clan head. 2) Find out the mastermind behind the poisoning attempt. 3) Complete exposure therapy. 4) Learn how to cook*. 5) Form a bond with Madara & Izuna
State of mind: Greatly disturbed
Standing within the clan: Prestigious
Standing within the household: Precarious ++
Standing within the clan's main branch: Pugnacious
Latest outstanding accomplishment: Made a plate of fried rice that could be mistaken for the portal to the abyss
Inner complains: "I'm going to develop haemorrhoids and pressure sores on my butt from prolonged seating one day."
Chapter Text
An entire fortnight passed by in that same, depressing fashion.
He prepared his own meals. He diligently performed all of the original goods's clan duties. He exhausted himself daily to keep this body in tip-top condition. He and his instant family mutually avoided the other. His insomnia and migraine persisted, with what little of sleep he could get be accompanied by night terrors made from Tajima's traumatic memories. And panic attacks became the norm behind the safety of his bedroom doors when the acting and dysphoria became all too much to bear.
Humans were social animals. If gone without social interaction and emotional intimacy for long periods, it was scientifically proven to be detrimental to a person's mental health, and this proved also true for Kai, who was a misanthrope with anxiety issues.
Unfortunately, as Uchiha Tajima, showing emotions and bearing one's soul meant social and political suicide. Thus, he trusted no one with his secrets, no one with his thoughts, and no one with his weaknesses; which only brought forth a deep mental fatigue, severe insomnia, and many breakdowns.
The only social interactions he has had all fortnight were from manning the mission office, and that was more harmful to a person with deep social anxiety than self-isolation could ever do to them. If not for Maou being his (unwilling) therapy animal, he would have long succumbed to those self-harming thoughts.
At the end of the day, if he could rate being transmigrated into Narutoverse during the Warring States Era as Tajima, it would be 1 out of 10 stars. Would not recommend to the faint of heart. The obligations that came with being Uchiha Tajima were not worth having heaven-defying super-powered eyes.
Sighing, Kai pinched the bridge of his nose, praying to Jashin that this budding headache would not turn into a migraine. The day had only just begun and he was already mentally fatigued from the never-ending pile of paperwork on his desk. Moreso when his (now deemed his and not Tajima's) aide-cum-office clerk dropped a thick folder on his desk.
Withholding a groan, Kai, in a detached manner, picked it up and flipped through the investigation reports he had previously tasked the man with. Kaen's presence in his office was left forgotten in the process of deciphering the words within the folder.
The reports were detailed, militaresque, and coded, which was expected considering the original goods's occupation. If he had transmigrated sans those wretched memories, he would have been utterly lost at the terminology used by these shinobis.
Kai felt disconnected from reality as he skimmed through the thick reports. Kaen, rather than simply doing what was told, went the extra mile and dug into the concubine's childhood history, past relationships, and the people her family and friends interacted with even in the passing. How Kaen had gotten so much intimate knowledge and information without the existence of satellites, CCTV, and social media… Kai did not want to know (probably with genjutsu and torture and nope).
As he closed the folder, Kai could not help pressing the heels of his palms into his eyes. Jashin had ignored his prayers yet again; the headache had turned into a full-blown migraine.
From what he understood, in conclusion: it was evident that the original goods had been too arrogant for his own good.
Tajima was a shinobi, yet he did not perform even a courtesy background check on his civilian concubine before marriage, who turned out to be a cousin of his eldest brother's wife. For the idiot to think that it was natural for ladies to flock to him due to his status in the clan was so dumb on so many levels it was not even funny. He even judged civilians to be harmless. If that was not considered digging one's own grave, Kai would eat his own foot.
The Uchiha Tajima from his memories was a paranoid individual who did not trust his siblings as they were raised to be rivals for the throne rather than family members. For such a person to disregard a potential danger… left Kai speechless. The original goods truly was an inconsistent, pig-like teammate Kai has to clean up after just to be able to eat chicken.
Did Tajima miss his 100mg daily dose of crazy-paranoid before he married the concubine? What even was this discrepancy? This gap was not moe at all. Kishimoto-sama, was this one of your plot holes? Character personality holes? For Jashin's sake…
"Tajima-sama?" Kaen's worried call brought him out of his glum.
Aiya! He forgot he was not alone. Outside his bedroom, he must not show weakness. Poker face poker face. Tajimask Tajimask.
Discreetly, Kai took a deep breath to calm himself and dropped his hands, turning indifferent eyes to his assistant. "Hn?" he grunted in a show of aloofness.
Kaen appeared sympathetic as he said, "It's normal to feel upset over a betrayal, Tajima-sama, especially if it was by a family member."
Family member? Betrayal? Upset? Who?
No, no, no. When did he ever feel betrayed? He was only trying to press the migraine down! And even if Kai did, Tajima would never. The original goods would be angered to death, sure. But to feel upset over some girl he married yet could not even remember the name of? That would be too humane of him. Tajima was a coldhearted bastard through and through.
The only person the original goods would ever call a family member was the current patriarch of the Uchiha clan who was also his father, Uchiha Sandayu. What about his siblings, niblings, cousins, or any other sort of relatives, you ask? Heh, no. If given the opportunity and authority to do so, Tajima would have scratched their names off of the family tree with a rusted spoon! The man was an unfeeling psychopath. He did not even think of Madara and Izuna as individuals, only an extension of himself, someone to push him further up the pedestal.
Kai debated with himself for a while before finally responding, "I appreciate the sentiment." He truly did. However, there was no way he could genuinely express that for fear of OOC-ness. If it were Tajima, the man would take offense in Kaen worrying about his emotional state. Hence, he forced his lips to curl into a sneer as he continued stoically, "Though I would appreciate it, even more, should you mind your own business and keep such pathetic thoughts to yourself."
The corner of Kaen's eyes tightened, probably at his rudeness, before his features smoothened into his usual genteel one. "Of course, Tajima-sama. I apologize for overstepping. Would you like me to continue digging for substantial evidence of their collaboration and attempt at murder via poison?"
Kai linked his fingers together and rested his chin upon them in the standard anime thinking pose. He contemplated his options. Did he want to invite more trouble to his doorsteps?
There were three options he could choose from.
Option number one was to become an ostrich with its head in the sand. Option number two was to gather a substantial sum of evidence and release them into the grapevines. Or option number three, which was to use said proof when he needed it.
Option number one, whilst tempting, would just make him an easier target. A problem of this magnitude (where unwitnessed murder was fair game) would not disappear just because he tried running away from it. Rather than absolve him of his title and let him be an ordinary member of the clan, ignorance was not bliss - it merely meant a swifter death. He could turn into a pawn, tool, or scapegoat to one of his fellow imperial harem members at any time if he were to choose this option.
Option number two, whilst it would satisfy his Chinese blood for vengeance, there was a saying back home: before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves. This would incur the highest level of enmity from the original goods's eldest brother, as the latter would be stripped of his title and removed from the imperial harem, thus bringing shame to his family and reputation. The genre would then change from historical imperial-themed to dog-blood revenge-themed within the snap of a finger. And that would be very bad. A person who has lost everything and has nothing more to lose was more worrying than a fellow concubine in a power struggle for the emperor's affection. If he were to choose this option, Kai would have to be prepared to sleep with both eyes open whilst thoroughly ridding the clan of the eldest brother and his faction.
Option number three. Blackmail. Nice and simple. It would bring more pros than cons. Kai was not the stereotypical Japanese isekai protagonist. He was not polite enough to choose the option of 'letting it go' and be 'non-confrontational' like many of those slice-of-life Japanese MCs. Rather, he was living in a cliché historical concubines fighting each other to gain the emperor's favor via political schemes and poison kind of genre, not slice-of-life… or even action-themed, which was supposed to be the original genre of this world.
But he digressed.
"Continue discreetly, and prioritize the investigation," Kai ended up saying after the long moment he spent weighing his options.
It was a shame to grant temporary leave to his office clerk when he truly needed a helping hand with all this paperwork, but he had to prioritize and allocate manpower where it was needed. Since Kai only has Kaen on his side (the entirety of Tajima's faction was made up of greedy two-faced snakes), there was not much he could do. He was not looking forward to tomorrow's workload.
"By your command." Kaen bowed, and when he straightened, there was a bloodthirstiness about him that felt out of place from the usual genteel man. When Kai blinked, it was gone, and he had to wonder if he had imagined all that. Kaen was, after all, a cripple. What harm could a disabled person do in a clan full of able-bodied shinobi? "Please look forward to my results, Tajima-sama. This one will leave no stone unturned."
"As you should," Kai harrumphed, trying for arrogance but it came off dead and flat instead. He was just so exhausted from acting all the time. "What of the- my... concubine?"
"She is under twenty-four-hour guard by those I trust explicitly with my life. By Amaterasu, I promise no harm will come to Tajima-sama's unborn child. We've restrained her enough she could only blink her eyes."
… That was not what he had asked, but the mental image of Tajima's heavily pregnant concubine strapped into a straightjacket and restrained akin to Hannibal Lector in prison almost made him call the Human Rights Commission. Once again, Kai was reminded of how cruel and barbaric this world was.
"When is she due?"
"The midwife estimated sometime this month."
Kai's finger twitched as the migraine behind his eyes pulsed harder at the unfortunate news. No, he did not want yet another instant child to care of that fast. He has not even made a single progress with Madara and Izuna, what of this unborn kid? Why was he, an asexual misanthrope, a father of not one, not two, but three tiny humans? Ah, kill him now. Should he pray to Jashin-sama for a miscarriage? No no no, Tajima was the human scum, not Kai. Besides, it was not as if he would personally have to look after the baby; Tajima's wife could do that. Kai just has to be responsible for… uh, the child's training. Yeah.
(Kai was such a hypocrite, no better than the original goods.)
"Hn. If there is nothing else, leave, I have work to do."
"Of course. Do call me whenever you need anything, for I am at your disposal." With one last final bow, Kaen exited the office, the thud thud thud of his cane against the wooden floorboards growing softer with his departure.
Rather than continue working as he insinuated he would, Kai hopped onto his feet and stretched towards the ceiling, groaning when his back popped satisfyingly. It was high time he took a break. And maybe get some animal therapy.
Maou should be near the pond, sunbathing whilst eyeballing the koi fishes right now. That kitten, from what he had observed over the fortnight, had a schedule that it adhered strictly to, and would be hissy if its routine was interrupted, akin to someone diagnosed with OCD.
It was hilarious (and healing) the way Maou reacted whenever Kai broke its daily routine. Kai was probably a menace and a bully in its eyes, but how could he resist teasing the kitten when it always looked at him as if he was a piece of chewed bubblegum stuck on the pads of its paws? Irresistibly cute.
Only fellow shit-scoopers could understand his sadistic desire to torment his pet kitten in the most innocent yet aggravating way possible. Getting kitty-punched or scratched in retaliation was the norm, as evidenced by the shallow red lines on his forearms and fingers. Maou would truly become its namesake when it grew older, but for now, its scratches were very cute and ticklish.
Oddly enough, Maou was not photosynthesizing near the pond like usual when Kai peeked out the veranda. Due to how tiny the kitten's chakra signature was (and no, it was not because Kai was abysmal with sensing shut up), he had a hard time tracking his wayward pet.
For a second, he assumed the worst; which was Maou having been cat-napped by one of the original goods's dastardly brothers. Fortunately, that was not the case when he peeked into the shed at the back of the mansion, the last place he thought to search.
Kai felt relief at first at the sight of his fur baby, before he realized he would not be able to torment– ahem, get his daily dose of animal therapy today since it was in the arms of his youngest instant son, Uchiha Izuna.
The toddler was playing with Maou using a handmade cat toy which was a blunted kunai that was tied to a stick with a string. Whilst Kai was glad that the weapon was blunt, he worried he would need to have a chat with his instant sons about weapon management… A shinobi needed to be prepared lest they die a pitiful death.
Izuna was trying his hardest to stifle a giggle as he watched the silly kitty clumsily run after his deliberately blunted training kunai with the grace of an uncoordinated baby giraffe. A second later, he could not hold in his peals of laughter any longer when the kitty tripped and fell face-first onto the stone floor.
"Silly Maou-tan is silly!" Izuna giggled whilst poking the silly kitty in the tummy. "And fat! Maou-tan needs to exewcise mowe."
It growled loudly as if aggrieved by the toddler's words, yet it made no move to leave or retaliate even when Izuna began kneading its chubby tummy with his own equally pudgy hands.
"Un, Izu isn't mean. Izu won't call Maou-tan fat anymowe… if Maou-tan plays wif Izu mowe," Izuna tried to appeal to the kitty, who was squinting at him as if it did not trust his words.
Izuna pouted. "Maou-tan don't be mean. Izu no tell lies. Madamada is the one who lies all the time!"
The silly kitty gave him a look. Izuna did not know how to describe such a look, but it was akin to the look Kaen-ojisan sometimes gave father. Was it dry amusement? Indulgent? Pamper? Something along those lines… but Izuna was too young to understand it properly. The uncertainty only made him grumpy.
"No!" Izuna harrumphed, unhappy by the look he was given. "Madamada weally lies a lot! He always gives Izu buwnt fwied wice sayin it's yummy but it nasty! Yuck yuck yuck!"
Maou tilted its head. Izuna nodded confidently as if he was able to communicate with the kitty. "Un. Kaen-ojisan made Iida-san leave. Izu doesn't know why. Madamada no like her so he doesn't cawe. But now we don't have a cook anymowe! Izu doesn't know who is making ouw meals now but Izu doesn't like fwied wice anymowe!"
The kitty's eyes were upturned as if it was laughing at an inside joke that only it knows. Izuna pouted harder, lips jutted and cheeks puffed out to the extreme. Even his hair was bristling. "Maou-tan is mean! Maou-tan always laughs at Izu. Izu won't pwotect Maou-tan fwom Madamada anymowe! Let Madamada pull Maou-tan's tail latew, see if Izu cawes!"
This time, Maou meowed and growled in response, paw batting away at Izuna's hands that were still kneading its belly like dough. Before Izuna could start his crocodile waterworks to freak the kitty, a shadow fell over his seated form, which pulled his attention away from the kitty and he looked over his shoulder in curiosity. Maybe big brother has finished his lessons faster today?
Alas, it was not who he had thought it to be.
Standing there, half obstructed by the door with the sun at his back, was his father. Even though the man's features were semi-shadowed, it did nothing to reduce the intimidating factor. Izuna blanched at the sight. His father, whose face was ice-cold with equally frosty eyes, looked indifferently at him.
Shinigami. That was the image Izuna had of his father. Ruthless and cruel.
Izuna leaped to his feet and quickly performed an elegant bow that had been drilled into his body since he could remember. "C-Chichi-ue!" Oh no! Immediately, he wanted to bite his inner cheek for daring to stutter. Father hated it when he stuttered, and a phantom pain shot across his cheeks at the memory of his previous punishments.
Izuna was prepared for it, his shoulders hunched and muscles pulled tautly. But the punishment never came, even after a long moment, much to his bewilderment. He cautiously peeked at his father, expecting the worst when eye contact was made. But father only continued to stare down at him emotionlessly, his onyx eyes soulless and bottomless, causing a shudder to run down his back.
(On a subconscious level, Uchiha Izuna felt only fear and avoidance whenever he was with Uchiha Tajima. There was no respect, no admiration, and no idolization present, vastly different from other children who grow up in a safe environment, treasured and loved by their parents. And whereas Izuna was too young to feel hate, the potential was there; the seed of hatred has been planted, and it was only due to his young age that Izuna continued to long for parental love and approval, thus preventing the seed from blooming too quickly. However, with how much his father watered that seed in his heart with sewage and biohazard waste, it would no doubt bloom into an ugly, odorous flower akin to a rafflesia. Uchiha Madara once lost his brother to that foul, rotten flower that had rooted itself deeply inside Izuna's heart. But what if a filter was attached to the watering can and filtered out all the impurities? Could the seed then bloom into a beautiful flower, a gerbera, perhaps? Only time would tell, as it was far too early to judge.)
But, at least, father's eyes were not spinning red. Izuna preferred a more physical punishment than having his nightmares turned into reality. Father was good at that; inflicting fear and mental torment. Bruises and cuts heal would within the week, but genjutsu damage lasted longer than two-year-old Izuna could count.
"What are you doing here?" Father spoke, terse.
Izuna translated his father's words to how dare you come here and skip training, just to play with the cat. I'm disappointed.
"Uhm, uh…" Izuna felt his eyes heat up, which was not a good sign. He swallowed and bit his lower lip, unwilling to shed any tears in fear of angering his father more. Father hated it more when he cried.
"What?" Father frowned. "Are you having trouble vocalizing?"
His brain automatically translated it to: don't anger me further. Speak, use words and answer my question!
"I'm so– uhm, my apologies, chichi-ue. Izu ish– uhm, I am on my bweak… bweahku… bvueak… uhm, uuu…" Izuna's heated eyes were darting this and that way as he stumbled on his words. Try as he might, he struggled with enunciation, his tongue simply too immature to properly form the right sounds for certain alphabets.
Don't cry don't cry don't cry, Izuna told himself, his heart beating a mile a minute. His fingers were clenching the sleeves of his garments in a death grip, his cheeks flushed and eyes watery. Don't cry don't cry don't cry. Cold sweat was beading on his forehead, and he could not quite control the terror from showing in his eyes.
Izuna could feel his breathing turn shallow, muscles trembling as he unconsciously hunched onto himself, head ducked low. If he could curl into a small ball, he would. But father hated it when he showed weakness. He needed to stand up straight. Stand up straight, Izu! But his body refused to cooperate.
From the corner of his eyes, he saw father take a step forward, a hand extending towards him. Terrified and intimidated, he clenched his eyes shut, muscles pulled taut as he waited with bated breath for the inevitable blow.
However, rather than the expected blow, something heavy fell on his head. It radiated a calming heat, which boggled Izuna enough for him to raise his head and peek through his curtain of hair.
"Eh?" The words slipped out before he could stop it, and the heat –a hand, his father's hand– retreated, much to his disappointment(?), which alarmed him. He feared his father's touch, so why did he miss the –monstrous, painful– hand that had just been on his head? Izuna just did not understand the way his heartbeat was in a different rhythm that should have been full of apprehension and fear.
Kai resisted the urge to thoroughly sanitize his hands for daring to pat a tiny human on its head. The reason for his mindless action was simple; his instant son had looked like a spooked hamster. When his mind conjured said animal's ears on the toddler at the thought, Kai could not hold out against the urge to calm the tiny animal down.
When he came to, he was already caressing the soft tuft of hair, which almost made his inner misanthrope (merged with Tajima) react violently. Fortunately for the both of them, he withheld such instincts and removed his wayward appendage from the toddler's head in a swift manner.
Maou was seated next to Izuna's feet, staring up at him as if he was an alien incarnate. Kai wanted to hide his face in its fur as he felt how warm his cheeks were slowly growing. Damn it, how embarrassing ah!
Rather than suffocate himself via cat fur, he swiftly turned on his heels to hide his loss of composure whilst speaking tersely, "It is almost time for lunch." The least Kai could do for his youngest instant son after spooking him so badly was to cook a meal for him (and maybe prove that his fried rice has, indeed, gotten better. Yes, he had overheard that rude remark, damn brat!).
Assuming that his instant son would be obediently toddling after him, Kai strode confidently towards the shed's doors. Already halfway out, he only paused when Maou meowed loudly in an attention-grabbing way.
Without bodily turning, he looked over his shoulder. There, on the wooden floorboards with his legs in a W position, was Izuna. The toddler's whole body was trembling uncontrollably. Forget walking, it would be a miracle if he could stand on his own.
Post-adrenaline crash, perhaps? That had happened to Kai numerous times after an exciting round of hacking into hush-hush databases.
He weighed his options.
After a minute or two of staring at the trembling hamst– toddler, Kai sighed. It made his instant son flinch, but he ignored that and moved into a crouch. Unaware that his eyebrows had furrowed harder whilst he held in his dislike at their close proximity, Kai retrieved a pair of leather gloves he had previously found in his bedroom from his pocket and donned them.
Now that there was a barrier between their skins, Kai felt more comfortable with the idea of carrying a tiny human. Thankfully, Izuna had a cute appearance. If not, Kai would not even consider touching him.
Grabbing the toddler by the armpits, he lifted Izuna whilst standing to his full height. As Kai mentally prepared himself to bring Izuna flush against his side, the latter had his mouth wide opened into an O shape, doe-eyed. Not that Kai was aware. No, he was busy hyping himself.
Izuna continued to dangle in the air for another five minutes, unmoving, before Kai mustered the courage to balance his instant son on a hip. When the toddler instinctively latched one pudgy fist on his chest and the other on his shoulder, Kai was not prepared for it and flinched, horribly.
Kai had assumed that Izuna would be dead weight as he was manhandled – like carrying an inanimate bag of potatoes, but oh boy he was wrong. A tiny human was still a human. He could feel his arms breaking out in hives underneath his garment.
The tension, which had previously abated, increased tenfold between the pair of father and son.
"Uhm, chichi-ue, Izu– I can walk," Izuna spoke in a barely-there whisper. His voice, which was full of tremors, contrasted greatly with the way his grip tightened as if he did not truly want to be set down.
Kai understood. He really did under these circumstances. In DV cases, the victims would latch desperately onto any semblance of affection freely given by their abuser, even if they knew deep down that it was temporary and toxic. However, even though he understood, Kai wanted nothing more than to ignore the tells and do as the toddler said; to set him down and let him walk on his own.
Kai almost did exactly that, but the rational part of his brain overrode his emotional side. It said; think about it… did Kai not previously thought of ways to close the gap between him and his instant sons? Furthermore, skinship has always been the fastest way to create a trustful bond.
Kai could do this. He could carry Izuna to the kitchen. It was only five minutes away if he brisk walked.
"No need," Kai responded crisply. Fortunately, the strain in his voice went over Izuna's young head.
The toddler merely nodded and made himself comfortable in Kai's arms. Stiffly, he brisk walked as fast as he could with Maou dogging at his heels, which slowed him down considerably lest he tripped over the furry nuisance. This better be worth it, he snide inwards at his rationale side as he deliberately ignored the way his heart beat loudly in his chest with an emotion he did not want to acknowledge.
(In the future, Kai would look back at this moment with great fondness and exasperation.)
Character Status
Name: Liu Kai / Uchiha Tajima
Age: 35 / 20
Race: Chinese / Japanese
Circumstances: Transmigrated person currently in Narutoverse Warring States Era.
Goals: 1) Become the Uchiha Patriarch. 2) Prepare evidence to blackmail the mastermind behind that incident. 3) Complete exposure therapy. 4) Practice cooking. 5) Form a bond with his instant sons.
State of mind: Discomforted
Standing within the clan: Prestigious
Standing within the household: Precarious ++
Standing within the main branch: Pugnacious
Latest outstanding accomplishment: Overheard Izuna dissing on his friend rice
Inner complains: "And I could've gotten away too if it weren't for those meddling kids and that cat of theirs!"
Notes:
Question of the day:
Should Kai's third instant child be a girl or a boy? Non-binary? Intersex? Trans? A toaster? Idk, what are your thoughts? Perhaps some versatility would give this story a little more flavor.
Chapter 8
Summary:
Sometimes, one has to accept the reality of being talentless in the kitchen and find other solutions to it.
Chapter Text
As soon as Kai stepped foot into the kitchen-cum-dining area, he all but dropped the child in his arms and strode to the kitchen benches to prepare lunch – all whilst turning deaf ear to Maou’s disapproving meows. Stupid, dramatic kitten. It was not as if Izuna had landed on his arse; despite his young age, the boy’s reaction was golden.
Kai ignored both tiny creatures behind him as he swiftly rolled up his sleeves, removed his gloves, unlatched his forearm protectors, and set aside hidden weapons from his sleeves. It was a smidge disturbing for Kai as he did not realize he had hidden quite a number of weapons up his sleeves when he got dressed earlier this morning. A paranoid shinobi’s muscle memory was scary.
Now that he did not have to worry about getting food products on his equipment, Kai grabbed a sharp kitchen knife and began preparing the ingredients. Tajima’s knife-handling skills would make any modern-day butcher envious, especially with how quickly he gutted and prepared the chicken.
If Kai had not experienced Tajima’s whole life in first POV when he first got transmigrated, his delicate city-boy stomach would have been upset with the very idea of preparing a very fresh chicken for lunch. Fortunately, although Kai was disturbed by how many human lives were ended by this body, it made him mentally prepare for his future as a shinobi of this warring era.
Kai already knew he had to set aside his modern-day mentality and morality to survive in this era since the only way a shinobi could retire was to either be severely crippled or dead. Severely, because even if someone had lost one of their senses such as vision or hearing, or a limb or two, they would still be expected to fight for their clan.
Kaen, his aide, was one such example of a severely crippled, forcefully retired shinobi. Not only did the man lose a leg, but he also lost most sensation in his remaining limbs and had severe nerve pain on movement due to a brutal fight against a lightning-element shinobi. Kaen was deemed too much of a risk on the battlefield as his body would have seizures ever so often. A danger to both himself and his comrades. At present, many would not know just by looking at the man, but it had taken him a long while to walk again without showing any weakness.
Hence, as much as Kai wanted to quit being a shinobi, he would rather fight for his survival than purposefully cripple himself to the point he was deemed useless by his clan head (this body's father).
The act of cooking was soothing. It cleared his mind and allowed him to zone out (which probably was not a good thing for one as talentless as him, but meh). When Kai came to, he was plating lunch. Without turning, he spoke curtly, “Izuna, fetch your brother.”
Unbeknownst to Kai, his youngest instant son had been silently playing with Maou as he cooked, once in a while staring at him in wonder. When his name left Kai’s lips, he had snapped to attention, heart beating a mile a minute, and stuttered an affirmative before rushing to do as commanded.
“Mrow,” the kitten called loudly, and when Kai threw a look over his shoulder, he saw Maou pawing at its bowl demandingly.
Kai rolled his eyes at the feline but was quick to fill its bowl with bite-sized raw chicken breast and plain scrambled eggs. Unexpectedly, Maou did not attack its bowl immediately, though it did appear impatient as its tail flickered left and right.
Shrugging, Kai went back to setting the table. When the last bowl of fried rice was placed, he heard soft, reluctant shuffling from the kitchen entrance. Kai made sure his stoic face was as expressionless as ever as he sat at the head of the table and gestured for his instant sons to take their seats on either side of him, where he had pre-placed the bowls.
Madara hesitated for a split second, unsure about their seating arrangements. If possible, he wanted Izuna next to him when in the presence of their father. However, he dared not vocalize his wishes for fear of making the man angry. His father was cruel whilst Madara was stubborn. To discipline Madara, his father would always choose to hurt Izuna. It made Madara fear and hate his father. This seating arrangement was, without a doubt, some cunning way to show Madara he held no power in their family. At times like this, Madara hated his father’s mind games more than any physical violence he could inflict.
If Kai knew what was running inside Madara’s brain, he would have just moved the bowls so that the two brothers could sit next to each other and Madara would stop plotting patricide. Alas, he was not a mind reader and only assumed the boys simply did not wish to be near him – which was fair. Tajima was as unpleasant as scum villains went.
He paid neither of them any attention and simply dug into his fried rice. It was crunchier than expected and a little burnt here and there, but better than his previous attempts. Kai was getting better – it was just taking a while.
From the corner of his eyes, Kai saw both his instant sons push their rice around the bowl whilst Maou ate with gusto. The corners of Kai’s lips dipped downwards, and his head lowered unconsciously. It seems that he would have to either work harder at cooking or find another solution to their meals. He could try hiring a cook, but with how much Tajima’s fellow harem members wanted him dead… it was a risk he was unwilling to take.
As a Naruto fan, it seemed kind of pathetic to become the reason for one of its main antagonists to die of food poisoning as a child. Although… Kai’s homemade meals were akin to poison in itself…
With a sigh that made both children freeze, Kai set his chopsticks aside and left the kitchen without looking back. His eyes were narrowed, more so than usual, as he briskly walked to his office, where he found his aide, Kaen, sorting through some scrolls. The man quickly stood at his entrance.
“Tajima-sama! Shouldn’t you be at lunch with the young masters?” Kaen questioned, unable to hide the surprise in his tone despite his genteel poker face.
Kai grunted; lips pursed before he evened his expression. “Are you competent in the kitchen?” Kai asked rather than answer the man’s question.
With one of his eyebrows raised, Kaen slowly nodded. “Indeed. I believe I am sufficiently competent in the kitchen.”
Kai’s lips pursed harder as he hesitated, weighing the pros and cons. In the end, he squared his shoulders and decided; fuck it, he would rather act a little out of character than allow his instant sons to starve due to his shitty cooking. He needed Madara to become the clan head after him ASAP, which meant nutritious food and a balanced diet. This was for the greater good ah!
“That…” Kai cleared his throat a few times, unintentionally stalling. “I am aware that this does not fall within your scope of work as my aide… However, I am willing to provide a little extra if you would accept… assisting me in the kitchen every morning.”
This was bloody embarrassing ah! But if Kaen could help Kai prepare an extra hearty meal in the mornings, the leftovers could become his family’s lunch and dinner. Stubborn pride would not keep their bellies full, so just suck it up, Tajima! Kai mentally tried to sort of rationalize to the original goods (if he were still there) and himself that this was a brilliant idea.
Kaen, with his genteel smile still in place, discreetly observed his young boss.
Tajima, since the poisoning incident, had begun to act differently. It went unnoticed at first, but for someone who had to work with the man every day in close proximity, it became painfully obvious that something had changed.
Kaen felt that his boss had gotten softer, somehow, although his paranoia had increased tenfold if that were possible.
Kaen has always been grateful to Tajima for giving him a job when he was at his lowest. But that was all. There was no sense of loyalty or respect towards the conceited and condescending Uchiha Tajima. If he were to choose between saving his own life or betraying his boss, he would have chosen the former in a heartbeat. He might sound heartless and ungrateful, but Tajima was a shitty boss to work under (a mistake meant injury).
However, that was before the incident.
The current Tajima was… hmm. It was hard to describe, but if Kaen were to put it into words, his current boss was… naïve? Silly? Cranky but clumsily mushy? All in all, someone that Kaen found fun to tease. Also, someone he was becoming increasingly fond and protective of.
As he kept his silence, Kaen fought hard to keep his amusement at bay. His young boss was adorable, especially at these moments when Tajima’s body language betrayed his extremely skilled pokerface. It was painfully obvious that his boss was embarrassed yet still tried to maintain a flawless, emotionless façade.
Kaen did not know why or how his boss had changed so much, but he liked this silly boss much better than the previous short-tempered one. And since he was curious about this sudden change, he decided he might as well accept the silent request for help. Who knows, his boss might be less guarded in his own home and involuntarily give him the answers to his unasked questions.
“I would be most delighted to assist, Tajima-sama,” Kaen responded kindly, cunning eyes hidden underneath thick lashes. “Shall I prepare the ingredients each morning?”
His boss’s face did not soften in the slightest, but his eyes did. Kaen expected his boss to leave right after without another word to keep up the appearance of a stoic boss, but when Tajima continued to stand there with cheeks that continued to darken in color, Kaen took a bit longer to figure out the reason and decided to mercifully help his silly and prideful boss out.
“Actually, Tajima-sama, would it be alright if I start my new task early? I would like to see what I will be working with and if there are ingredients I should purchase for tomorrow.”
Tajima clicked his tongue as if annoyed at his request, but it was easy to see that his boss was eager to get him into the kitchen and fix him a meal.
Kaen knew that after the incident, Tajima allowed no one to cook for him or his sons – and for a young master such as him, he would no doubt have nil experience in the kitchen. Kaen wanted to shake his head at his boss’s paranoia but whatever, he did not mind cooking for his boss since he found cooking relaxing, anyway.
Besides, Tajima has always been generous with his paycheck.
Kai returned to the kitchen with Kaen at his heels.
When they entered, the children were still there, and despite how long Kai had been gone for, their bowls were still ¾ full. Kai’s face blackened in despair at his own cooking skills whilst his aide took one look at the bowls of fried rice and smiled extra hard.
“Pardon me, young masters. Tajima-sama, please, have a sit.”
With no regard for Kai’s feelings, Kaen grabbed all the bowls on the table and… threw them into the trash. His instant sons wore shocked and terrified expressions on their faces at Kaen’s ballsy attitude.
If Kai was not pretending to be the stoic scum that was Uchiha Tajima, he would slump into the darkest corner of the room and grow mushrooms. Alas, he was now Tajima and could only swallow this bitter pill and sit at the head table with his back ramrod straight as if offended (which he actually was, mind).
Wu wu wu… Why was he so shit at cooking…
Character Status
Name: Liu Kai / Uchiha Tajima
Age: 35 / 20
Race: Chinese / Japanese
Circumstances: Transmigrated person currently in Narutoverse Warring States Era.
Goals: 1) Become the Uchiha clan head. 2) Find the evildoer who poisoned Tajima’s family. 3) Complete exposure therapy. 4) Learn how to cook. 4) Form a bond with his instant children.
State of mind: Depressed
Standing within the clan: Prestigious
Standing within the household: Precarious ++
Standing within the clan's main branch: Pugnacious
Latest outstanding accomplishment: Unintentionally provided another reason for Madara to plot patricide faster.
Inner complains: "I may be pretending to be the scummiest bastard alive, but I too have feelings okay?!"
Chapter 9: Melon seed eater Kai!
Summary:
Kai likes people watching.
Notes:
Chapter warning: heavily inspired by chinese webnovels
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Kai lounged on the roof with all the ease of a cat in the sun, basking in the chaotic energy as he continued cracking melon seeds between his teeth and spitting the shells carelessly to the side.
Red eyes narrowed in amusement as he tracked the trio below, their bickering echoing up the narrow alleyway. They thought themselves hidden from the busy street, but from his vantage point, it was too damn clear—loud voices, flailing hands, and secrets spilled out like dirty laundry left for anyone to see.
Cheap theatre, but Kai was never one to complain about free entertainment, especially considering the lack of the internet in this world.
It was as if his guilty pleasure had come to life: dog blood historical drama.
His favourite.
Kai leaned forward eagerly, as though he was in a VIP balcony seat and not the hard roof. One of the three ‘actors’ (a sharp-tongued young woman with long black hair) suddenly slapped her rival across the face.
The brunette barely hesitated before lunging, and soon the pair were tangled in each other’s hair like feral alley cats. The last of the trio, a lone man, made a clumsy attempt to play peacemaker, only to be shoved aside and land squarely on his ass.
The drama carried on without him, much to Kai’s delight.
“You wench! Let go!” the brunette screeched, face blotched red with rage.
“Slut! You’re the one who slept with my husband!” the black-haired woman spat back, words sharp as kunai.
“Only because you’re a dead lay!”
“Excuse you?!?!”
Kai nearly choked on a melon seed; laughter caught in his throat. This was so much better than any dog blood drama on telly. Who knew Uchiha could emote so… explosively?
If the escalating shouts didn’t attract a peanut gallery soon, he’d be genuinely disappointed at the lack of gossipers in this clan. Kai might even have to start a newsmongering business to lighten up these sticks in the mud.
Scratches soon joined the hair-pulling, nails raking down arms and faces as if the women truly meant to shred one another to tiny itsy bitsy pieces.
Kai’s crimson gaze was fixed and unblinking, afraid to miss a single second of this absurdly entertaining brand of chaos. He barely noticed the small ball of floof that plopped onto his shoulder, tiny paws kneading at his high collar as it craned its neck to watch with him.
The brawl below grew uglier by the moment; barbed words and slaps flew like shuriken, and Kai leaned further in, clearly pleased.
The drama was unfolding beautifully.
“S-Stop!” the unfaithful husband stammered, wedging himself back into the fray with all the effectiveness of wet toilet paper. Then, in a display of sheer idiocy, he poured oil onto the flames. “Please, let’s not do this here. It was an accident, dear! I was drunk! I mistook your sister for you—and it was just a one-off thing! You’re the only one I love!”
Kai’s jaw actually went slack around his melon seed. Oh, he did not just say that. He slapped a hand over his mouth, shoulders trembling with suppressed laughter. This was no longer just drama—it was divine comedy.
Truly courting death, that one! Kai nearly applauded, full of mirth.
The two women froze mid-brawl, hands still twisted in each other’s hair, and turned in unison to gape at the man.
Their expressions mirrored the stunned silence of an audience waiting for the next episode to air after a deliberately cruel cliffhanger. Kai eagerly waited with bated breath, melon seed forgotten between his fingers.
“We look nothing alike for this to be an accident.”
“You said I was prettier than my sister the last three times.”
The two women spoke in perfect chorus, then froze.
Silence stretched, thick and expectant.
Kai crunched another melon seed, eyelids drooping lazily as he watched the cheating husband wilt under their combined glare, sweat pouring down his face like he’d been dropped in a sauna.
The tension in the alley was exquisite, every second of it delicious.
Then, the women registered each other’s words.
In an instant, a truce was struck, and they turned on the true culprit.
Fists and feet rained down in uncanny unison, the scum man collapsing into a whimpering ball on the ground. His pleas for mercy came out garbled through split lips, every apology drowned beneath the rhythm of their blows.
Go ladies! Kick him harder! Yeeeeeeeeehhhh! Kai inwardly cheered.
He leaned back against the rooftop, lips quirking in blatant satisfaction as the scum husband was flattened black and blue by both his wife and sister-in-law.
The women unloaded a nonstop barrage of cusses, words dripping with venom as they struck him physically and verbally, sparing no part of his pride.
Serves him right for letting his dick call the shots. What a horny bastard. And to go for his wife’s sister, no less… pei pei pei. An absolute trash of a man.
Unfortunately, Kai’s drama-watching was cut short when a pair of enforcers arrived to pry the trio apart.
The man crawled, utterly devoid of dignity, to hide behind one enforcer’s legs, quivering as the furious women continued to spit threats while being restrained by the other—mostly about detaching his manhood from his body.
Truly… hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.
“Aiyoh… It was just getting good, too,” Kai lamented, reluctantly deactivating his sharingan. “What a spoilsport.”
Still, he made a mental note: this would be perfect for a re-watch on depressing days. Nothing brightened the mood like watching dog blood drama did—especially when Tajima’s own version of a ‘historical drama of concubines killing each other for the emperor’s favour’ threatened to spoil his future.
Knowing that the show was now truly over, Kai tied his melon seed pouch and, with dextrous fingers, slipped it into one of his many hidden pockets. Time to return to the suffocating building he now had to call home.
“Mrow.”
Kai flinched, caught off guard by the loud meow right next to his ear. He hadn’t even realized that there had been another audience member with him all along.
Turning slightly, Kai finally noticed Maou lounging on his shoulder, wearing a distinctly unimpressed expression despite its otherwise floofy face. Onyx eyes seemed to silently judge him for his love of epicaricacy.
Kai huffed, amusement betraying his otherwise wooden expression. His grumpy little kitty… somehow, even its clear distaste of him was unbearably cute.
Giving the kitten a few pats, Kai made sure Maou was secure on his shoulder. With one last glance at the people below, he slipped away unseen, moving across rooftops with practiced ease on his way back to the office.
Morning tea had long ended, but there was no way Kai would let Tajima’s anal obsession with punctuality stop him from witnessing, in person, a once-in-a-blue-moon, real-life dog-blood drama.
Kai knew his priorities. Dog blood drama always came first.
Kai slipped soundlessly through an open window, landing with practiced ease onto the tatami floor of Tajima’s office.
The air was stuffy; heavy with ink, parchment, and the faint musk of old wood—stifling when compared to the freshness outside.
He stretched his shoulders slightly, relishing the solitude and the absence of other humans. Sighing, he straightened, dusted a stray melon seed shell from his sleeve, and let Maou hop onto the desk. The kitten immediately claimed a stack of reports with unmistakable authority.
Kai envied its arrogant confidence. If only he could dispatch Tajima’s endless mountains of paperwork with a single disdainful glare.
Dropping into his seat cushion, Kai, almost unconsciously, sat primly with his back straight, emulating the impeccable mannerisms the original goods had drilled into this body.
His eyes drifted to the neatly arranged documents waiting for his attention, then away just as quickly, hands reaching for a tray to prepare himself a cup of tea. Thank you, Kaen, he inwardly praised, grateful that his aide had set aside everything he needed for a cuppa.
After the real-life dog-blood drama he’d just witnessed, the thought of reviewing expense logs and mission-related paperwork felt like punishment from the Shinigami itself.
Kai blew a small breath of fire to heat the cup of tea in his hands. He was petulant, not that his wooden expression allowed him to freely express it. The original goods had truly mastered the art of poker face.
Haiya… how stressful it was, having to live Uchiha Tajima’s life.
Maou flicked its tail, utterly unimpressed by his pathetic attempts at procrastination.
Oh, leave me be.
Any minute now, Uchiha soldiers would enter the office with mission reports and requests, shattering his brief human-free sanctuary with their presence. Kai could already feel his stomach ulcers multiply from the stressful thought—he hated humans and their unpredictable tendencies.
And Kaen, ever efficient and insufferably thorough, would replace any finished paperwork with two more that demanded his urgent review (every single one of them had ‘urgent’ stamped on them, which was absolute bullshit).
Kai was fairly certain his fellow concubines (in their imperial quest to become the clan heir/head) were behind it, scheming to drown him in unnecessary bureaucracy until he either gave up his candidacy or died.
What a nice thought.
Feel his sarcasm.
Well. At least Kai still had today’s alleyway brawl saved in his sharingan memory bank for entertainment’s sake. Much better than Tajima’s collection—mutilated corpses, bloody killings, and carnal indulgences.
Pei pei pei! Begone, foul memories!
Honestly, why couldn’t the original goods fill his sharingan memory bank with happy things instead of vomit-inducing nightmares?
Mid sip of his bitter, slightly foamy matcha tea, Kai was interrupted by a crisp knock at the office door.
Aiya… my stomach…
Before he could prepare mentally for the intrusion, Tajima’s mission office door slid open.
It was a never-ending revolving door from then onward.
A stream of shinobi filed in, one after another, moving with controlled efficiency, scrolls clutched tightly in their hands. Their footsteps were muted against the tatami mats. Some wore scuffed armor, others were wounded, bloodied attire marking past battles.
If not for Tajima’s impressive wooden face, Kai would’ve grimaced. Blood was a bitch to clean, and secretly, he would always try to tidy what he could to spare his crippled aide the effort.
Reports came in rapid succession; patrols completed, intruders spotted and neutralized, mission objectives achieved...
Faces blurred into a sea of uniformed seriousness—each eager to impress, each blissfully unaware of Kai’s rising tension and exhaustion.
And whenever the office emptied for even a moment, Kaen would magically appear in the doorway, perfectly composed as always. Without a word, he’d file away the completed mission reports and replace them with financial logs or some other mundane nonsense—again, and again—until Kai felt his stomach lining practically erode from overwork.
Not to mention how the air was thick with the mingling stench of sweat, blood, and body odour, each scent twisting together like a foul symphony. Even with the windows thrown wide open, it clung to the room, heavy and oppressive, crawling along Kai’s skin and making his throat tighten in instinctive disgust.
Kai’s shoulders grew heavier with each passing hour, his cup of matcha tea long forgotten and set aside.
He lost track of time, and even though he had closed the office at 1pm sharp for the last hour, he kept his head bent over the desk, reviewing and revamping the never-ending stacks of paperwork.
The world around him faded, leaving only the relentless monotony of his work. His eyes blurred over the ink-stained scrolls, the elegant script warping into meaningless squiggles as fatigue gnawed at him.
Kai was rudely jolted out of his trance-like state when a hand clamped roughly over his chin, yanking his head upward with a sharp jerk that nearly gave him whiplash.
Sharp pressure dug into his jaw, and his teeth clenched instinctively as pain radiated along his strained neck. His pulse spiked, heart hammering in his chest, and his stomach twisted into tight knots.
The sudden contact shattered his fragile calm, leaving him acutely aware of the panic coursing through every nerve.
He could feel every muscle in this body tense in preparation to fight, even as his mind screamed for him to take flight, his head straining to pull away, but the grip was merciless—bruising and unyielding.
Kai forced himself to focus on the present, his blurry eyes flicking between the office's exit and the hand gripping his chin. A kunai had already nestled in his palm, hidden by the billowing sleeve—a silent thanks to Tajima’s compulsive paranoia.
However, before he could act on the impulse to stab, Kai froze.
His eyes adjusted fully, and he blinked at the stoic figure before him. Onyx eyes, unreadable and cold, radiated an intensity Kai dared not discern; he was fairly certain doing so would make him projectile vomit from sheer anxiety alone.
Oh, wonderful. The emperor himself has deigned to personally honor little ol’ me with his presence, Kai thought bitterly (maybe even hysterically), gut twisting as he forced himself to remain upright and motionless.
Uchiha Sandayu.
Tajima’s father.
A psychopath who thrived on—and actively encouraged—extreme sibling rivalry. The man who had moulded the original goods into utter trash, the same one who pulled Tajima’s strings like a marionette…
Great. No pressure. Just a casual, unscheduled meeting between psycho-father and fake-son. What could possibly go wrong?
Character Status
Name: Liu Kai / Uchiha Tajima
Age: 35 / 20
Race: Chinese / Japanese
Circumstances: Transmigrated person currently in Narutoverse Warring States Era.
Goals: 1) Become the Uchiha clan head. 2) Find more blackmail on the evildoer who poisoned Tajima’s family. 3) Complete exposure therapy. 4) Learn how to cook. 4) Form a bond with his instant children. 5) Create a group of newsmongers.
State of mind: Gastric ulcer-induced anxiety
Standing within the clan: Prestigious
Standing within the household: Precarious ++
Standing within the clan's main branch: Pugnacious
Latest outstanding accomplishment: Recorded a nice one-shot episode of a dog blood drama whilst procrastinating.
Inner complains: "I forfeit my candidacy. Please spare me any further administrative sabotaging, oh fellow concubines…"
Notes:
so..... i really wanted to write a short little dog blood drama... it kinda helped me with my writers block ngl.
anywayyyyyy! huzzah the emperor has arrived huzzah huzzah
Chapter 10
Summary:
Kai's sudden and unnecessary introduction to Tajima's no good very bad piece of shit father.
Notes:
Chapter warning: graphic description of domestic violence. gaslighting. emotional manipulation. dissociation. you know; all those fun trauma-inducing stuff i like to write about.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Kai’s very essence shrieked at him to rip the fingers from his skin before the bile could surge up from the knot of revulsion and dread twisting in his gut. Yet the hand belonged to the Head of Uchiha, and this body, conditioned to never defy, locked him rigid in place.
It was a silver lining of sorts, for this body to lock and deny any instinctive jerk from Kai.
Sandayu’s personality was unhinged and relentless, all harsh edges and iron will, and Kai was under no illusions about the price of defiance—the countless memories of Tajima suffering under his father’s hand left no doubt. This body remembered too vividly what it meant if he moved or reacted without permission.
Kai might loathe being touched, despise the crawling sensation of another human pressing against him, but the prospect of empty punishment and hurt ranked just a little higher.
Kai could feel his hands trembling harder beneath the folds of his long sleeves with every passing second. The kunai this body had instinctively grasped slipped from his loosened fingers, hitting the floor with a disgustingly loud clang that tore through the oppressive silence of the room.
Yingyingying… Why was this body’s impeccable discipline failing him now?
To allow a hidden weapon to slip so boldly in front of Sandayu, and thereby revealing he had armed himself in the first place, was hardly the most pragmatic choice. Tajima was truly a pig of a teammate ah!
Thence, he remained frozen with his heart hammering in his ears and bile clawing up his throat, struggling to keep his mind calm despite the urge to burst into tears from sheer stress alone.
Sandayu’s cold, cold gaze slid predatorily to the fallen kunai… then back to him. Too deliberate to be anything else but pure intimidation in its threat.
Tā mā de, Kai inwardly cussed. Not good—
His internal panicking was violently interrupted by the thunderous crash of a heavy object hitting the floor, just as the death grip on his chin yanked him abruptly to his feet from his seat on the floor cushion.
Kai’s heart rate skyrocketed, threatening to betray the calm he fought so desperately to maintain. Miraculously, he withheld flinching, knowing any sign of weakness would be instantly preyed upon and punished.
I'm scared.
His eyes remained controlled, not once having diverted his gaze, but his peripherals caught the aftermath: his desk had been hurled against the wall, causing splintered wood to embed itself into the tatami mats. Scrolls and documents lay scattered in chaotic disarray, edges curling and smudged by the spilled inkstone and cold tea.
His anxiety spiked. There was no longer any barrier between them—
Burning, searing pain bloomed across his left cheek, replacing the vice-like grip on his chin as Sandayu’s backhand sent his head snapping to the side.
I'm scared.
Outwardly, Kai merely tilted his head back to face Sandayu, expression neutral, hair shadowing his eyes, and posture rigid even as he felt the corner of his bottom lip split—a perfect picture of control.
The rules were ingrained in this body: never react, never show weakness, and submit to your betters. (Supress, survive, submit. Teaching that Tajima had passed down to his young sons. A vicious cycle of violence; from victim to perpetrator.)
Inwardly, however, Kai was a right mess. Hot tears had built behind closed lids, unbidden, whilst his stomach churned, and his chest constricted as though the air itself weighed him down.
I'm scared I'm-
Not even my own parents had hit me before, the thought, absurd and raw, became a gateway to dissociation, a fragile buffer to shield him from the horrifying reality of what was to come.
(It was unfair. Kai wasn’t even supposed to be here in Narutoverse. Why must he endure this treatment? He hadn’t asked to be transmigrated!)
His hands trembled further—the only crack in the carefully constructed mask—and he clenched his fists so tightly his nails bit into his palms, willing the tremor to stay contained.
Once Kai was sure that his tears wouldn’t betray him, he blinked open his eyes and kept his gaze lowered, letting this body soften just enough to convey submission and compliance; an exact mirror of how the original goods would behave when subjected to Sandayu’s unpredictable wrath.
What did I do to deserve his anger, anyway? Kai couldn’t help but think bitterly.
I'm scared i'm sca-
“Left arm,” Sandayu commanded, voice flat and devoid of emotion.
Kai complied instantly, not daring to hesitate for even a second.
This body moved on autopilot, raising his left arm and baring it, sleeves bunched to the elbows, even as anxiety and panic surged through his mind.
The limb was a map of past punishments—overlapping scars layered thick from wrist to bicep; rough, discoloured, and uneven, each mark a testament to repeated abuse that was hidden as discipline.
The sight of them made him want to projectile vomit.
I'm scared i'm scar-
Kai had an inkling of suspicion on which ‘disciplinary measures’ he would be receiving soon, just by bearing the instructed limb in question. The knowledge didn’t soothe him; it only sharpened the dissonance between mind and body. Go figure it was the limb that his discarded kunai had fallen from.
Kai didn’t so much as flinch when the absolute bastard who dared call himself a father began looping ninja wire around his forearm, each loose coil biting cold against his scarred flesh.
“I’m disappointed,” Sandayu murmured, baritone dipped in a counterfeit of warmth. "You know it pains me to do this."
To Kai, it rang with nothing but mockery.
To the original owner of this body, though? It had always passed for parental affection.
The man continued, voice soft, almost coaxing, as the wire bit tighter, “If you’d been faster—reacted properly—your unborn children might still be alive. You see that, don’t you? I don’t want to do this, son. But you leave me no choice. This pain is yours, Tajima. You forced my hand. I’m busy, yet here I am, wasting my time because of you.”
I'm scared I'm scare-
Kai, a modern man who had once lived in a humanized, informed world, recognized this song and dance for the hollow, cruel farce it was.
From the outside looking in, the gaslighting was disgustingly obvious.
However, the original goods had been conditioned early, groomed to yield to that voice, to that hand… mistaking every hurtful wound, every deliberate lash, and every ugly scar sustained… all filed away in his mind as a matter of discipline that proved his incompetencies (if only he had done better, just like what father always told him. If only he were less inept, his poor father wouldn’t have had to punish him, wouldn’t have to waste time teaching him how to be capable).
But Kai, for all his fractured edges and fragile state of mind, wouldn’t bend to Sandayu’s poison.
He would never.
None of this was on him, no matter how Sandayu twisted it.
No matter how much the practiced lies were pressed, Kai refused.
He wouldn’t follow Sandayu’s script.
Not my fault.
Not my guilt.
Not mine to bear.
I'm scared I'm scared-
If anyone should carry this blame, it was Sandayu himself for rearing such ferocious offspring. It was this scum villain's fault for the resulting loss of lives.
“Your brothers have come to see the errors of their ways, just as I’m helping you understand yours, Tajima,” Sandayu continued, voice smooth and controlled and so so so insufferable to Kai's ears. “Still, all of you should have known better—I raised you better. To never treat the lives of my grandchildren so carelessly. Madara carries exceptional potential, and I have high hopes for him. Had you been any slower, Tajima, I might have lost someone truly valuable... and I don’t say this lightly.”
What a way to glorify the expendable, Kai mocked this manipulative piece of trash inwardly, the voice cold in his mind, even as a distant part of him wailed non-stop; the wire continued to bite into his flesh with every cruel punctuation, tightening and tightening around his occasional twitching arm.
A way of draping cannon fodder in sanctity just so the children were left untouched, whilst the adults mercilessly tore at each other with claws and teeth; scheming, striking, and scrambling for a throne steeped in contempt and cruelty.
Barbaric, the lot of them.
Blood continued to cascade along his arm and down his fingertips, warm and metallic on his skin, trickling in slow, sticky rivulets that darkened the tatami mats beneath him—
More for him to clean, his mind noted, detached and distant, as if he hadn't more important matters to attend to.
I'm scared I'm scared I-
“It’s truly regrettable that you’ve lost two to your eldest brother’s foolish gambit, but the past cannot be changed. I trust you’ll do your part for the family, Tajima. Five children would honour that duty, though more would only bring pride. Fewer would be… disappointing… and I know you wouldn’t want to let anyone down. Do you understand?”
Impossible.
Kai was asexual. He hated human touch. There was no way he would comply with such absurd—
“I understand, Chichi-ue,” Kai felt himself say instead, voice flat and measured, face unreadable. The words sounded distant, his lips and tongue feeling almost foreign, as if he were watching someone else speak in his place.
Blood continued to seep deeper into the tatami beneath his feet.
His arm had long since gone numb, fingers deepening to a bruised purple, and muscle twitches were non-existent from the lack of circulation.
A metallic tang hung in the air, nauseating as it mingled with the previous scents in the room.
I'm scared I'm scared I'M SCARED
“Good. Very good. As expected from my son,” Sandayu said, voice almost tender, though his eyes glinted with something darker.
“I shall join you for dinner tonight; I would very much like to see my grandsons’ progress firsthand, and I trust your wife will prepare a meal worthy of the occasion… hm?
“Ah… she has recovered, I hope? If the chances are too high that she remains… compromised, it may be best to find someone more… suitable. Perhaps one of the elder’s daughters, or a distant cousin, even someone from a neighbouring household that has caught your eye? Any who can safely secure more pregnancies.
“Well, no matter. We shall continue this at a later time.”
Without further ado, having arrogantly spoken as if the world revolved around him, Uchiha Sandayu released his grip and departed, leaving behind the bloodied tatami, the tight coils of the ninja wire around Kai's torn and bloodied arm, and the oppressive silence of his cruelty.
As if none of it mattered—because to Sandayu, it didn’t.
Not the state of the room.
Not the state of his supposed son.
Kai observed the aftermath of Sandayu’s visit with blank eyes.
The office had to be restored to its pristine state before Kaen returned from dinner preparations. The wire needed to be removed from his arm. The lacerations had to be tended to. The documents needed to be redone. The… The…
I'm scared I'm scared I'M SCAREDI'MSCARED-
He collapsed to his knees, as if a marionette whose strings had been severed abruptly.
His breaths came in jagged, stuttering gasps, each inhale sharp and shallow, and each exhale mostly stuck in his lungs.
Warm beads of tears rolled down his cheeks as he absorbed everything and nothing at once, detached yet ensnared in the crushing weight of what had just occurred.
Gradually, the haze began to lift.
His hands shook, trembling against the rough weave of the tatami beneath them.
He felt the dull ache of his left upper limb, insistent and cool, and the wet coppery slick of blood seeping across his skin.
The state of the office slowly registered. The scattered papers, the toppled inkstones, the shattered desk, the bloodstained tatami.
His shoulders shook as awareness returned in uneven waves.
One thought at a time clawed back into focus. The wire, the lacerations, the documents, the cleanup.
Bile joined the blood on the tatami mats, dark and warm, staining it further.
More to tidy.
Abruptly, sobs broke free, slipping past his bruised and split lips, each one a small surrender to the weight of what he had survived—and what he still had to endure far too soon for dinner tonight.
Emotions began to resurface. The distress, the despair, the desperation, the anxiety, the horror, the dreadful anticipation.
He needed to start moving, lest he be late for dinner. Lest it disappointed Sandayu and he received yet another injury.
Kai’s hands continued to shake violently as he mindlessly reached for the ninja wire still coiled around his arm.
Every muscle felt foreign, uncooperative, as if this body had abandoned him in the wake of add-on trauma.
His fingers quivered uncontrollably, unable to grip the wire enough to loosen it.
Frustration flared hot in his chest, mixing with the residual fear and misery, and his sobs grew louder, more ragged and sharper.
There was no outlet for the bitterness clawing at his throat, no target for the terror clawing at his mind.
He could only stare at the wire, quivering, as the coils bit deeper with every failed attempt. Hot tears flowed heavier, mingling with the blood and bile on the tatami.
He clenched his teeth, jaw aching, forcing his trembling hands to try again, over and over, each attempt a small battle against this body, and every failure twisted the knot of helplessness tighter in his stomach.
Rage, frustration, helplessness—they had nowhere to go but inward, churning the sobs that tore from him with a raw, unrelenting sound.
But just before he teetered on the edge of complete overwhelm, a dart of black entered his vision.
Kai tried to retreat, to put distance between himself and… everything else.
He was in no state to rebuild his walls, to don a mask of indifference. Not this soon. But his legs betrayed him. Weak and unsteady, he could only curl further into himself, shivering uncontrollably and bracing for impact.
“Mrow.”
A familiar kitten’s soft meow cut through the haze of panic.
Maou.
Sheer relief flooded his system as his wet-blurry vision noted the kitten's cautious approach, each step telegraphed carefully. Maou’s tail flickered in an irritated, twitching motion, but he moved closer nonetheless, small paws padding softly across the ruined tatami in a telegraphing manner.
How kind. Animals truly don’t deserve us humans.
Despite the violence he had just endured, Kai found it within himself to twitch his lips upward into a fragile, reassuring semblance of a smile. Perhaps he had failed—Maou’s steps faltered for the briefest moment—but in the next heartbeat, the kitten was at his side, relentless.
The warmth of Maou’s small body pressed against his side was a soft, grounding weight.
Kai’s fingers, still shaking, brushed against fur that was real and alive and harmless. Not a danger to him.
The world outside his panic—the tatami, the blood, the wire, the upcoming dinner—remained, but it no longer consumed him entirely. Maou’s steady presence offered him a chance to slowly reclaim fragments of himself.
Surprisingly, Maou didn’t radiate its usual contemptuous aura at being touched by him. Instead, it remained calm, almost purposeful, as if aware that Kai was a single misstep away from breaking completely.
Even more surprisingly, the kitten leaned in, claws extended, and began picking at the wires coiled deeply into Kai’s flesh.
He was about to shoo the kitten away, knowing how strong ninja wire was and didn’t want Maou to hurt itself.
But surprisingly, he sensed a faint trace of chakra coming from the feline. It seemed to harden its claws, allowing them to slice through the steel wire with eerie precision.
One coil at a time, his forearm was freed.
And with each release, intense pain surged through the previously dull ache, awakening nerves that had long lain numb.
The sting of the cuts, the cold bite of the wire, the slick warmth of blood—all returned in brutal clarity.
A whimper escaped his bruised lips, and this body trembled further, yet he endured it all under Maou’s careful ministrations.
For a moment, his world narrowed to the small rhythm of the kitten’s movements.
The relief mingled with agony, and the fear mixed with trust, created a strange, fragile equilibrium.
Maou worked steadily, and Kai allowed himself to be aided, to feel gratitude, and to begin reclaiming a semblance of control which Sandayu had violently taken from him.
“Th-t-t-ha… tha-… th-t-thank—” was all he could manage with how much he was sobbing, each breath rattling through his trembling frame, each shudder wracking his cold, aching body.
When Maou was done, the kitten pressed its soft, furry face against Kai’s wet cheek, kneading lightly with tiny paws as its elongated body stretched to be able to reach him.
The warmth, the gentle pressure, and the quiet insistence of the tiny creature broke something inside him that had been suppressed tightly with fear, paranoia, and shock.
Even more tears continued to fall, mingling with the blood on his skin and the fur on his cheeks, but for the first time in what felt like hours, Kai felt himself again.
The agony in his arm and the sting of the cuts remained, but Maou’s purring presence gave him a thread of stability, a reminder that he could survive this moment.
Animal therapy, the hysterical voice in his head whispered, and despite the tremors still wracking him, Kai clung to that thought, letting the kitten’s warmth further anchor him back into this repulsive body. Thank Jashin almighty for animal therapy.
I'm so fucking scared-
Notes:
welp. somehow all my recent updates have the mcs break down. idk bruv. its all a coincidence im sure. do i need to give him an emotional support adult at this rate??? or i guess maou is more than enough...?
anyyyyyyhow. i had initially planned to get kai all bruised and battered from a severe beating. but then my plot bunnies be like hold that thought cuz imma make this father character into a more sophisticated version of a scum villain. a physical beating? meh! lets go fullon emotional guilt tripping and manipulative psychopath route! and well what else can i do but pass my laptop to my plot bunnies? theyre absolute freaks thats fo sho.
so whatdya guys think? too much? too little? should i have added more kicks/punches..? but i feel like a backhand is more degrading in this situation... hm... ah well. please tell me your thoughts! heheheheheh.
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