Work Text:
May 22, 2022
Madam,
I have detected an error on page 736 of your revised edition of “Hogwarts: A History”. P.N. Black was indeed the most recent legitimate Slytherin headmaster of the school, and should be acknowledged as such.
Mr. Sydney Chacal
May 31, 2022
Dear Mr. Chacal,
I debated whether or not your curt missive was even worth a reply, but I'm not willing to let your misconception stand. I assure you that after speaking with Headmaster Black’s portrait – at length – he considers Severus Snape to have been Albus Dumbledore’s rightful successor and acknowledges that the castle itself regarded Headmaster Snape as legitimate during his tenure. Unless you are able to provide a reliable primary source to substantiate your point, I consider the matter closed.
Attitudes like yours are exactly the reason I chose to undertake this project in the first place. Even those of us who were personally involved have found it difficult to parse the events of the war. While my publishers eventually decided to update Hogwarts: A History only up until Albus Dumbledore’s promotion to Head, I have begun collecting the personal accounts of the surviving members of both the Order of the Phoenix and Dumbledore’s Army. I hope that my next book will dispel many remaining prejudices and misconceptions.
Sincerely,
Ms. Hermione Granger
June 6, 2022
Madam,
Obviously no written records exist to corroborate your baseless suppositions. Never the less, it is your duty as an historian to render orally-preserved perspectives while refraining from useless commentary.
Do as you will.
S. Chacal
June 14, 2022
Mr. Chacal,
Was that some sort of joke? I assure you that it was neither humourous nor well-received.
I worked closely with the current Headmaster of Hogwarts, Professor Filius Filtwick, on the revised edition, and as his guest I had free access to both the ghosts and portraits in the castle. Black is not the most recent Slytherin Head of Hogwarts, and that statement is not useless commentary but fact. You have no right to render your opinion if you aren’t willing to offer anything constructive in return.
Sincerely,
H. Granger
July 9, 2022
Madam,
Since by ‘constructive’ I presume you mean that you are unwilling to do your own research, your error on page 394 can be rectified by referring to Derwent’s correspondence with Prewett.
S. Chacal
July 20, 2022
Dear Minerva,
Dear “Sydney”,
I’ve finally stopped laughing long enough to pen a response. Oh, dear sweet Merlin. Is peace and solitude really so boring that you're reduced to pranks?
Sorry to end your game this early, but I just returned Prewett’s folio to Irma and she told me that it’s the only extant copy of his correspondence. Your cover’s been blown. I thought about continuing our little game, but I realized it would be an insult. It’s lovely to hear from you anyhow – we had so little time to catch up at the benefit gala.
Since Irma ruined your little prank, maybe you could start by telling me all the things I got wrong in the book. I should have sent this to you before publication, but I didn’t want to put you out. I thought you’d want to enjoy your retirement without your swotty former students sending their work over for you to edit – was I wrong? Would you like to help on the Voices of War and Peace project? A different perspective on what’s relevant would be just the thing. My editor would like the draft manuscript by the year’s end so that we can release this just before the 25th anniversary.
Before I fill you in on all of my happenings here, I’m desperate to know how you got my owl to deliver a letter under an assumed name. Is there a charm for that? It was clever of you to switch the genders around, and if Irma hadn’t had a useful moment we could have continued this Merlin only knows how long before I realized you were having me on. Sydney must be a reference to my parents and my trips to Australia, but why Chacal? You know, I almost thought you sounded a little bit like Professor Snape at one point. Was that intentional, or do you – and you know I won’t ever let you live this down if it’s the case – unconsciously mimic him when you’re pretending to be a man? Of course, you did spend decades in his company, and he was one of your protégés, so maybe that’s not so much of a puzzle after all.
I’m very well. Rose and Hugo are here with me right now, and we’ve finally worked out a system. They went to Ron in July and are spending August here. They seem to be adjusting to things now that the papers have stopped blathering on about our ‘scandalous divorce’ and digging up old history. Rose barely spoke to Harry at Easter break because of those ridiculous Triwizard rumours re-surfacing. Ridiculous. It wasn’t true when we were fifteen, and it’s even less likely now. Ron’s finally accepted, I think, that I wasn’t being unforgiving about the affair. It just revealed a lot of other things that weren’t quite right, and never have been. I miss my best friend, but I don’t miss the domestic drama one whit. I’m like you in that way – I prefer sensibly addressing issues to emotional displays.
Rose continues to excel in Quidditch, pranks, and blowing off revision. I swear if I hadn’t given birth to the girl I’d be tempted to think she wasn’t mine. It’s almost as if Harry and Ron had a child together, and when she teams up with James they’re an absolute bloody nightmare. I wonder if they won’t manage to send Filius and Neville round the bend completely, or finally give Filch the detention subjects of his fantasies.
Hugo is having his best friend over for a few days before term begins, and you’ll never believe this, but it’s Draco’s son. I suppose I should have anticipated it when he sorted into Slytherin, but I have to admit that it’s still a bit…discomfiting. Scorpius looks so much like Draco – and Hugo so much like Ron did at thirteen – that sometimes I feel as if I’ve gone back in time. I don’t feel forty-two, and it seems like just yesterday that I was sitting in class while you lectured.
How is your golf game coming along? Are you keeping your promise and learning the muggle way, or have you spelled your clubs? I’ve never been to Inverness, but sometime I’d like to visit you there and avail myself of your biscuits again. I had lunch with Poppy a few weeks ago and she said your cottage is lovely and that retirement suits you, and I’m glad.
Hugo says hello. I’m not sure what his motives are, but then, I never am.
Must run for now since I promised the kids a trip to Lyme. I love Bath, even if it’s a fairly small magical community. Most of all, I love being out of the Ministry and working on projects dear to my heart. My time is my own now, and the freedom is intoxicating!
Hermione
August 22, 2022
Hermione,
I’m so glad to hear from you, even if your missive was a bit perplexing. My dear girl, I’m not sure what you meant about my owl not taking your previous letter when it was addressed to me instead of Sydney. Aside from the note about the owl, I haven't received a letter from you since last Christmas, and I replied promptly. Were you referring to Sydney Parker? I’m surprised you know her at all since she was a few years behind you and a Hufflepuff. She didn’t come back after the war, you know, and I think she married a muggle boy and gave up magic completely. Very sad. Have you been in contact with her?
Poppy is here for a visit and she’s brought me a copy of your book. I’m so proud of you, although it’s absolute rubbish that they only allowed you to update it through 1949. If I were to venture a guess, I would say that they’re protecting the Ministry, since if anyone could have pulled it off with ‘perspective and distance’ (did they really say that to you? Poppy says she’s quoting you verbatim) it would be you. Albus always did make the Ministry look like a bunch of incompetent fools. Politics! I can’t tell you how glad I am of my little cottage and my weekly golf game and my little half-muggle life.
Neville wrote and said you’re collecting all of those interviews you did with us and that you intend to publish a memoir of the war years. Please let me know if I can be of assistance. It’s about time they were all forced to confront the truth instead of having everything filtered through the papers and the official channels. I know Madam Scamander has done her best, but she is a very singular sort of woman even now.
If you find yourself in Scotland drop in and see me. I shouldn’t say such things, but of all my students you have always been my favourite. Perhaps it’s because I see so much of myself in you and because you’ve done so well for yourself. Of course, I’m not counting Severus or Neville in that. Neither of them were a particular pleasure to teach when they were students even if I eventually became very fond of both of them. Never fear, I’m in no danger of becoming sentimental in my dotage. Life goes on, and I only dwell on the pleasant memories.
Minerva
My dear,
Inverness is lovely and I should think I’ll stay until Quidditch season starts unless Filius thinks Katie needs my help. When you’ve sent the children back to school, we’d love to have you here. Minerva has rooms enough for both of us.
Love,
Poppy
August 25, 2022
I'm not even sure my owl can find you so I may have just wasted the entire afternoon trying to compose a letter that won't ever be read. This is my fourteenth draft, and I’ve managed to narrow it down to one question and one request.
How did you know about Derwent?
Please destroy my previous letter, as it was meant for someone else.
H. Granger
August 28, 2022
Madam,
Prewett’s papers are the only known copy. Do you suppose yourself to be the only amateur historian on these isles?
Your secrets are safe.
S. Chacal
September 2, 2022
Madam Pince, the resident librarian at Hogwarts, was quite insistent. The folio is spelled so that it cannot be duplicated, and Derwent herself cast the spell.
Neither Madam Pince nor Headmistress McGonagall recall you, and since Prewett’s papers are restricted you would surely have come to their attention had you tried to access them even as a student.
I am down to believing that Sydney Chacal is an alias, although I was obviously wrong about your actual identity. Will you confirm it for me if I guess correctly?
Draco?
H. Granger
September 5, 2022
Madam,
No and no.
Please desist with these baseless accusations.
S. Chacal
September 6, 2022
Sir,
They are not baseless accusations. Your suggestions were actually very helpful, even if you went about offering them in a rude manner. The mystery of your identity is a puzzle, however. Do you have any published works?
H. Granger
September 6, 2022
Madam,
I merely offered two critiques of your revision. I do not require nor desire an ongoing correspondence.
S. Chacal
September 6, 2022
Sir or Madam or whoever you are,
I was certain that you were either Draco Malfoy (I imagined some plot to get me to divulge information) or George Weasley (having me on), but now I think you cannot know me at all if you presume that you can set a mystery before me and not engage my curiosity.
I am very, very curious. If you do not divulge your identity, I’ll conclude that you wish me to puzzle it out.
H. Granger
September 8, 2022
Madam,
I wish no such thing and ought to have never intruded at all. Your time is better spent on your account of the war.
My best wishes for your future endeavors.
S. Chacal
September 14, 2022
Sir,
It’s a fine time for you to decide to be gracious and pleasant; that’s not enough to put me off, but it was revealing no less. I had a thought so insane I was almost ready to check myself into St. Mungo’s for evaluation. Care to guess what it was?
I’ve enclosed a little gift for you, a book. It’s one of my favourites – a muggle classic. The plot’s a bit ridiculous, but the protagonist shares your name. He reminds me a bit of someone I once knew…someone I remember fondly.
Miss Granger
October 4, 2022
Sir,
Right. Of course you didn’t respond. What could you possibly say? I thank you for the return of my book, but I admit I was disappointed to find no comments in the margins.
To be honest, I’m flattered. I’ve been in Scotland since I sent last wrote – I went to visit Minerva and Poppy. I wasn’t sure if my wards would hold should you decide to Obliviate me. That was before I went back over your previous letters and realized that you were drawing me into this all along.
Obviously, I have a million questions. Most of them are exactly what you’d expect, given the circumstances, and I won’t waste the ink since you already know what they are.
I was very circumspect, but I asked Minerva a few subtle questions about the portrait enchantments and how reliable they were when used as historical sources. I’m a bit disappointed in her actually, because she knows more than she realizes but she’s never stopped to really think all of it through. It was an enlightening conversation. There is still so much that isn’t known about the charm, why it does or doesn’t enchant someone. For example, we’ve known since the end of the war that Professor Snape’s portrait was not recognized by the castle, but also that – in every other way – the castle responded to him as Headmaster. And we’ve also known that it was because Minerva hadn’t ever formally resigned her place in the succession, and that the castle will – probably – enchant both portraits when she passes on.
Fascinating, isn’t that?
I don’t think I ever quite realized – until now – that it’s all wishful thinking on Minerva’s part.
But enough about old history.
Did you enjoy A Tale of Two Cities? I really am fond of that book, you know, and I’m fond of The Jackal as well. When I was a child, I thought it was such a romantic story – he loved Lucie enough to sacrifice himself for her. But then I read the ending again, and I realized that it wasn’t for Lucie at all – he died for the things she loved, because despite his mistakes they were the things he loved too. He went to the guillotine to try to salvage what he could of the good in the world. I never imagined that I’d play the role of The Seamstress.
I won’t ask why you did what you did in the first place.
But why me? Why now?
Why did you want to be found?
Hermione Granger
October 11, 2022
Sir,
You haven’t obliviated me yet, but I wonder at you returning my previous letter obviously opened and resealed. What is it that you want from me?
I have no intention of invading your privacy, but it’s obvious from the simplicity of your riddle that you wanted me to know who you are. I assure you that I have no intention of revealing your whereabouts, and I'm willing to swear that by wand oath if you wish.
I also have every intention of fulfilling your request if I possibly can. Lucie’s children owed Sydney their lives. I’m sure that none of them ever forgot his sacrifice.
Ms. Granger
October 19, 2022
Madam,
I received the book you sent. It is an interesting account of events in the 18th century but entirely melodramatic. As an historian, you must be cautious of over-romanticizing the past. I suspect that people do things in order to feel important – in order to feel that they have something to offer the world – more than they act out of obsession and passion. Having been through a war and become something of a public figure yourself, you know as well as anyone how often motives are misconstrued. I suggest you read the ending of the book again, more carefully this time. The second-to-last paragraph is particularly important.
My only motive in writing you is to correct the errors in your work.
S. Chacal
October 27, 2022
Dear Sir,
I am sorry for the delay in writing back to you. As you might anticipate, I needed time to process your revelation. You are correct that Dickens is melodramatic, and I suspect that you must hate the smarmy sentimentalism of the language a great deal. But to answer your unasked question, yes – I think Lucie’s son did remember him the way he hoped to be remembered, and understood his motives as well as anyone born of Charles Darnay ever could have. I think that Lucie’s son would have told her grandchildren – including that “child who bore his name” – that Sydney Carlton was a credit to his house, and the best friend his mother could have had.
But perhaps I’m projecting too much upon the characters. We don’t really know, do we? And anyway, it’s not history, it’s a work of fiction. But I did have a fairly similar experience a couple of years ago when my son went off to school. He was the first Weasley to ever be sorted into Slytherin, and his Uncle Harry told him something about a boy who'd never stopped being his mum’s best friend, about how he was the bravest person any of us ever knew.
I understand something about best friends, and what it means to be willing to storm into the mouth of hell for their sake as much as your own. Harry and I have that still.
That’s why I started writing history, you know, despite my minimal qualifications as an historian and the woefully pathetic education I received in the subject. All of the news articles that were rehashed in the wake of my divorce finally sent me round the bend. No one was either so good or so bad as they were written, and we were really all just people trying to do the best we could to keep going, keep some faith in the idea of a better world alive. Harry is neither a messiah nor a potential Dark Lord; Ron is neither a washed-up has-been undergoing a mid-life crisis nor a misunderstood hero with a vindictive ex-wife; Professor Snape was neither a scoundrel nor a saint.
Shall I send the manuscript I’m working on? I would be more than open to any suggestions you might have for further revision.
I've re-read your first letter, and I’m curious – do you honestly believe that Black was the last legitimate Slytherin headmaster, and are you willing to explain your reasoning?
Sincerely,
Ms. Granger
November 3, 2022
Madam Granger,
Thank you for sharing your further thoughts on the book. It seems that we share a common opinion on the 18th century, and you are a better historian than I realized.
I have no wish to contribute in any significant way to your work, but I would consent to offer feedback on your drafts.
As for my initial assertion, there is no empirical evidence contrary to it, and the oral history of one portrait is not a reliable primary source. In addition, you risk legitimizing conduct undertaken on the direct orders of the Dark Lord. Whether that conduct was “for the greater good” or not, the acts themselves should not be condoned. I urge you to consider the long-term consequences of your interpretations, and render your narrative accordingly.
S. Chacal
November 7, 2022
Dear Sir,
I am overwhelmed by your latest letter. You have given me so much to think about. I believe that you’re trying to tell me that I have been too concerned with trying to sway public opinion about the actions of one man when I shouldn’t be attempting to justify them at all.
At first, that struck me as wrong – shouldn’t we try to overcome prejudice by finding common ground? I have believed that my whole life, and I have built my career around that principle. I believed it was in my son's best interest to vindicate those members of his House worthy of vindication. In other words, I was thinking more about Slytherin than I was about the Death Eater movement, which was rather more ecumenical than is generally acknowledged, Pettigrew being the most obvious example. But without that framing, there is a danger – no one came out with clean hands, but perceptions change gradually.
I've enclosed another book for you. I’m unsure how much you know about muggle culture, so I won’t presume that you’ve ever heard of it before. I’m going to share my thoughts on it, so you may want to discontinue reading this until you've finished it.
I was a third year when the film version of this book was released. My grandmother – my mum’s mum – was a Holocaust survivor. My great-grandparents were Dutch, a Jewish doctor and his Protestant wife, and they sent her to live with relatives in England. That was 1940, right at the start of the war, and her parents and brothers were all killed. This wasn’t talked about very much in our house, but…(you’ll find this hard to believe)…I tended to pester everyone with questions.
I have some suspicion that you’re laughing at me right now.
Anyway, Schindler’s List. My Oma hated it. Not Schindler himself – she believed that he was a righteous gentile and that (her words) he was written in the ‘book of life’. But there was this general perception that not all Nazis were bad, and she felt it minimized what had been done to her family. Not everyone who at some point joined the Nazi party was bad, but the ideology was rotten to the core. And Schindler himself was far too complex to fit some tidy definition of ‘good’ or ‘bad’. He had weaknesses, and those weaknesses made him vulnerable to Nazi propaganda. The converse is that it was only because of those weaknesses that he was able to save the few he did. The ones he saved hold his memory very dear for good reason, but that doesn’t mean he should be held up as some sort of role model. His mistakes shouldn’t be ignored just because he was also cunning and courageous. The only correct historiography is one that strives to take the most balanced possible view of his motives.
It is a very good lesson for me to remember before I go about compiling this memoir. Thank you for your input. I was still framing everything (subconsciously) in terms of Sydney Carlton. And to some extent it’s a good analogy, but I think Oskar Schindler is equally applicable. I risk over-empathizing with certain people because I have more information, and a more complex perspective, than the general public cares to consider. I shall strive to render events as accurately as possible, and I expect that your feedback will be no less incisive and direct than it has always been. My work will no doubt be better for it.
But did you notice that the people who were on Schindler’s List believed that ‘he who saves one life saves the world entire’? They were grateful even for his mistakes because his mistakes were responsible for their salvation. I am sorry to be so direct, but I also want you to understand why it is sometimes difficult for me to remain unbiased.
This is meant to be an account by the surviving members of the Order of the Phoenix and Dumbledore’s Army in their own words. I am primarily serving as the editor and organizer of the project, and as such I have limited input in how they choose to interpret events.
What do you suggest?
Perhaps it’s best if we just wait for you to look over the drafts. I’m working as fast as I can to get them into some semblance of order because I don’t want to waste your time. Are you amenable to taking them in pieces? I have Minerva’s and mine ready to go, and I should have Neville’s finished by the end of the week.
Best,
Hermione Granger
November 14, 2022
Ms. Granger,
I have read both the book you sent and the minor novella which accompanied it. I admit to being somewhat familiar with that particular history as it coincides with Grindlewald’s War. You have chosen a relevant and applicable analogy, in so far as Schindler was a man of many grievous faults.
Do you intend for your next work to include an oral interview of Albus Dumbledore’s portrait? Albus Dumbledore and Phineas Nigellus Black may have valuable perspectives to share, particularly if both Professors McGonagall and Flitwick encourage them to be frank with you. I have studied portrait enchantments at some length, and I suspect they will not reveal any information contrary to the wishes of the current and emeritus heads. I think you will find both portraits already more free with information than they have previously been.
If you are able to approach the living heads of Hogwarts with both discretion and forethought, you may do so. The portraits know all, but they will only say as much as they are able.
I am willing to accept your drafts for revision in any format you deem acceptable.
I am also relying on your ability to act with common sense and maturity. Certain information must not be revealed. I trust you to act with disinterest in this matter.
S. Chacal
November 15, 2022
Dear Sir,
I am honoured to have your trust, and I assure you that I have been very careful not to reveal our correspondence with anyone. In truth, there is little opportunity for me to do so. I am wholly engaged in my writing now that the children are in school, and I’m a bit remote here in Bath. I’m not complaining since the peace and quiet has given me the chance to work on projects I’d put off for a long time, but I’ve sacrificed my social life in order to do it.
I no longer have any desire to sway anyone’s perceptions one way or the other, and I’m content to present events as objectively as possible.
I’ve included both my account and Minerva’s. I wrote mine long before we began our correspondence, and those are my known and public sentiments. If I deviate too much from my previous opinions it will invite comment, so mark your revisions with that in mind.
Minerva’s is full of twaddle regarding a great many things, and I advise you to take as much of it as you can with a grain of salt. She’s as bad as Professor Slughorn in her way, and she portrayed all of the younger Order members (everyone she taught) as her proteges. Please don’t be too angry with her – she means well enough, and she’s suffered a lot of guilt over some of her actions. You’ll find she doesn’t spare her own dignity in her recollections even if they’re a bit hazy and sentimental.
Neville’s will be along shortly. I look forward to reading your comments. I've sent off a request to Filius regarding the portraits and I hope to interview them during the Yule break.
I hope you’re well.
Best,
Hermione
November 18, 2022
Miss Granger,
See the attached manuscript for comments. There are fewer errors in your account than I anticipated, and I made quick work of it.
McGonagall’s will take some time. It is worse than I feared.
I am content. My boredom has been abated by having something useful to contribute to the dialog.
S. Chacal
November 18, 2022
Sir,
Neville’s is attached and I have begun working on Poppy’s.
I redacted Neville’s account of the boggart and his subsequent guilt over the incident. I think you’ll find that the rest of it is rather less gruesome than you might expect.
Fewer errors? My Hogwarts years are covered in red ink; please send your bird back in a couple of days after I've gone over your revisions.
Hermione
November 20, 2022
Sir,
I have accepted most of your revisions, but I am unwilling to concede on Sirius and Remus. I know that you have valid reasons for seeing them as you do, and I don’t entirely disagree with you. I just believe that emphasizing their flaws to that degree is unnecessary. Sirius in particular is a tragic figure who spent twelve undeserved years in Azkaban for murder. I think even you will agree that it was an excessive punishment for carelessness no matter what the consequences of his irresponsibility were.
Both of them were negligent but affectionate friends. This is in direct contrast to Professor Snape, who was loyal and steadfast but not terribly kind. I’m sure that the ideal is somewhere between those two extremes. Wouldn’t you agree?
That is what I intended to convey, and I hope that I have effectively done so.
Hermione
November 25, 2022
Miss Granger,
I have attached Professor Longbottom’s manuscript, which came as a refreshing surprise. I found that I needed a break from McGonagall’s ridiculous assertions. Are you certain she’s well enough to contribute? Dementia is often a problem with advanced age, Albus Dumbledore being the most obvious example.
I do not agree, but you have achieved your aim. In fact, I believe ‘not terribly kind’ to be a gross understatement. I suspect that Professor Snape spent most of the war attempting to keep determined but naïve delinquents from harming themselves and others, and that he was not in the most solicitous mood as a result.
I observed that you glossed over the origins of the mysterious Quidditch fire and the source of your Polyjuice ingredients, and omitted the question of illegal time-turners and the hospitality of the Centaurs entirely. You come off as a model student in your own account. If that is indeed what you intended to convey, you have done so effectively.
Sir
November 26, 2022
Sir,
Would you be put out or pleased to know that I spit tea down the front of my robes when I read your latest missive?
I left a bit out of the Umbridge fiasco for the sake of brevity. The moment that I realized she could be duped will be lost to history, but do you realize that Professor Snape stood in the doorway of her office and mocked her? I swear the vindictive cow had no idea what he was doing. She was immune to irony, and he exposed her vulnerabilities in front of an audience of very interested parties. It was a short leap from that to the tender mercies of the forest creatures.
Would it surprise the world to know that he had a sense of humour? It is one of those humanizing details that I think you’ve warned me against, so I shall leave it out of the published account.
I've spent the last twenty-five years being repeatedly assured by Minerva and Filius that I was not just a model student but the very best student they ever had, and who is left to argue with that assertion? I’m afraid it’s quite gone to my head.
Kingsley’s article is attached. It’s less than I hoped for, but the Minister of Magic must be careful what he reveals about his actions against that very organization, no matter how justified they were. Politics – always bloody politics. Harry told me that the Auror division is careful about revealing their investigative methods, so I suppose that’s part of it. If Tonks were still around, she’d damn the torpedoes and give me the truth at least. Next up – a spate of Weasleys. I still don’t have Harry and Ron’s completed accounts, although Ginny assures me that Harry’s delay is only on account of trying to weigh how much to disclose about the last days of the war. Ron is just tardy.
Neville has a better grasp of the past than you might suppose, and he is nothing if not fair and forgiving. Minerva revealed that both the Room of Requirement and all of the passages are accessible and known to the Heads, but of course she didn’t know that until she took the office. Since it is only a bit of castle lore, and a security provision, we all agreed to hold that information in confidence. Of course, I’m not revealing anything to you that you didn’t already know by writing it now, but understanding of just how far Neville’s rebellion was not only tolerated but encouraged has been the making of him. He didn’t write – but has said – that Professor Snape chose him as a leader, and equipped him with the tools he needed to become one. When he’s Headmaster, his favourite teacher will have got him there. And he’s not referring to Minerva.
Speaking of Minerva, are you completely reworking her article, or have you burned it? I have the original here; shall I just publish and be damned?
Hermione
November 28, 2022
Miss Granger,
I assure you that I have no idea what you were blathering on about in your latest correspondence, but very little of it was relevant to the project at hand.
I fear that brevity is still beyond your abilities.
Regarding 'best alumna', I realized (via the tripe I'm currently revising) McGonagall had run mad, but I wasn’t aware that Headmaster Flitwick was similarly afflicted. Has someone checked them for memory curses?
No truth is ever revealed in its entirety, and politics is always one of the many justifications given for omission. An historian’s job is to convey it regardless. We shall see how you fare in that quarter when it comes time to arrange the order of these accounts. Madam Lupin is missing from the dialog, so it is up to the living to say what she would have said. Balance how you present this, and her voice will speak in the silences. Or bray in them, as it were.
Potter ought to recount the events as accurately as he can without engaging in speculation. While the general public will undoubtedly devour whatever useless suppositions he posits, I hope that you understand why that would be an undesirable outcome. As for Mr. Weasley, I expect that completing any sort of written project on his own is beyond his capabilities. You may as well begin writing it for him.
Madam Pomfrey’s article is enclosed.
S.
December 4, 2022
S –
I shan’t drink tea anymore whilst reading your letters, I’ve decided. I hardly know to respond, except to say thank you. Working with you on this has been quite a bit more entertaining than I would have expected.
I’ve spoken to Harry and he has decided to forgo putting his thoughts in order. I told him just to write what came to him and that I would do the editing for him. And you, of course, although I didn’t reveal that I have a co-conspirator.
I can’t very well leave Ron out of the book, but I’m at wit's end where he’s concerned. What is so difficult about jotting down a few personal reflections? If I don’t have something from him by the time school breaks, I’ll task Hugo with interviewing his father. The children are spending the first week with Ron and Portia and Hugo is very persuasive when he wants to be. He owes me for agreeing to play house-elf for the Lords of the Flies over the holiday.
I’d like to try to get as much of this done as possible before the break – I’ll have a houseful the second week. Rose will probably spend some time at Harry and Ginny’s, but in return I get Hugo, Al, Scorpious, and Francois (Bill’s youngest). Two Slytherins, a Gryffindor of the sensitive variety, and a Ravenclaw. It promises to be an interesting week.
What are your plans for the holiday?
There’s enough in this packet to keep you busy for a good long time, I should think: Arthur, Molly, Bill and Fleur (they insisted on a combined effort) and George, who only agreed to submit if he could do so as 'Forge'.
Percy is furious that I didn’t ask him to contribute, but really. He was never a member of the Order or the D.A., and he spent most of the war hiding out in the Ministry. He barely spoke to me at Teddy and Victoire’s wedding - hope it blows over by Boxing Day.
Hermione
December 6, 2022
Granger,
I have finally given up on making sense of McGonagall’s delusions. I did attempt to make revisions – several times – but I finally settled on correcting only the most blatantly misleading fantasies. Letting the rest stand seems the best course; she reveals herself to be an interfering, self-important, sentimental, and dotty old tabby with far too much time on her hands – paws. The truth will out.
I am amused to read that Mr. Weasley is now relying on his children to complete his homework rather than his friends. It shows remarkable foresight on his part to have bred himself a permanent clerk.
Isn’t Christmas all about keeping up family traditions? To that end, I intend to get blindingly drunk on mulled cider and start fights with any carolers unwise enough to inopportune me. If I can manage to topple the tree in my stupor, or perhaps start a small fire, it will be much like the halcyon Christmases of my childhood, although vastly more quiet.
Is that the sort of admission you were seeking?
My revisions to Shacklebolt are included. Is his wife submitting independently?
S.
December 7, 2022
S –
For heaven’s sake, I wasn’t trying to wind you up. I have no idea what your life is like, and I wasn’t asking you to share it with me. I suppose it was just my way of trying to get in a Christmas cheer.
I think it’s rather cruel of you to suggest that I just give my writers enough rope with which to hang themselves, but Minerva may be a special case. It isn’t poorly written or particularly disordered, so there is only so much ‘editorial privilege’ I can wield without irritating her.
Andromeda declined to write anything. She said her recollections are too personal – too caught up in her own family drama. I can’t really blame her; I don’t know what you could possibly say when your sister spent years trying to kill your daughter and eventually succeeded.
How are you coming with the Weasleys?
Hermione
December 10, 2022
Granger,
Pax.
The Weasley accounts are included. While they were still a bit disorganized, they are affecting. I proposed no material changes.
I will take Miss Lovegood’s article next.
S.
December 11, 2022
S –
Luna is still off somewhere gallivanting with her husband, and I don’t expect her article until the middle of the month. I didn’t complain about her because I know she’s good for it, and she writes very well. Her perceptions are what make her stories a bit unique. I wish I could have seen what her essays in school were like – they had to be interesting at the very least.
I read over your suggestions on the various Weasley recollections. You’re a very good editor. I wish I’d realized that earlier, because I might have learned more from you when I had the chance. I do tend to ramble on, but you cut right to the heart of the matter. Have you ever written? I mean something aside from editorial comments and reports and potions and spells. I’ve just re-read that last sentence. I suppose what I mean to ask is if you still write. Actually, I’m curious what you write about. I don’t think people like you and I can ever just stop writing, full stop. All of the ideas have to work themselves out somehow.
Sorry – that’s so personal. I can’t help myself sometimes. Please don’t be put off by my silly Gryffindor foolishness, because I’m so grateful for your help and I wouldn’t want to try to do this without you. I know I’m still a bit insufferable, even if I’m tottering on the brink of middle age. I didn’t realize how obnoxious I was until I had children of my own and had to deal with miniature earnest swots. You had Harry – you know what I’m talking about. You’re always the most horrified when they do something that reminds you of you, blundering into making the same mistakes you made, doing the same stupid things over again.
Rose has been suspended. That is what I am trying to say. She and James hexed one of the fourth-year Hufflepuffs and sent him to the infirmary with what they both claim was a joke-gone-wrong. Hugo is also in the middle of it, because he and Albus were with Scorpious when Davis – the Hufflepuff – accused him of being a Death Eater’s son. Then Al stood up to him, and Davis said that he wasn’t much better, being named after Severus Snape and all. Which Al told Rose and James about in the common room that night. And I understand why they all wanted to hex the little shit six ways to Sunday, because I’d like to wring his neck too. Of all the ignorant, vindictive, unkind things to say to a sweet-natured, sensitive boy like Albus. And who knows how it’s affected poor Scorpious, whose grandmother is responsible for saving my best friend and defeating Voldemort and is probably the unsung savior of our world, Dark Mark or not.
Ron went and got her and I’m to pick her up in the morning and take her back to Hogwarts. No doubt he’s showering with praise right now for sticking up for her friends and family, and I understand that her intentions weren’t bad.
But they sent a boy out to the forbidden forest – to Aragon’s lair – with a badly-done copy of the Map which they claimed would ‘protect’ him. If Hagrid hadn’t intervened, God only knows what would have come of it. As it is, he tripped on some roots and broke his arm, and it’s nothing a bit of Skelegro and a few days rest won’t mend. But why didn’t they think? It’s not just some crazy story about their dads being reckless and brave. No magical car is going to rush out and save everyone. It was stupid and foolish and careless.
I’m sorry to dump this on you, but you and Molly are the only two people who can possibly understand how bloody pissed off I am right now. How? How do I make her understand what could’ve happened?
Speaking of Hagrid, his article is enclosed. It’s short because I had to remove all the parts where he admitted – in writing – to crimes which don’t have statutes of limitation. No sense of self-preservation at all!
Hermione
December 12, 2022
Hermione,
You could have warned me that you were turning the tables and I ought to avoid drinking anything whilst I read your letter. I cannot – ever, mind you – recall laughing that hard at anything.
So Miss Granger is finally getting a taste of her own medicine, is she? That alone is worth the price of admission, even at the enormous cost of enduring your endless bloody questions. I would dearly love to know how the Potters dealt with their own offspring. That sort of detail never makes the papers.
I do write, but I cannot tell you how or what. Suffice it to say that when you are raised as a muggle, you never completely leave that world. I have always kept a toe in, no matter which one formed the predominant part of my life. I am eccentric but not remarkably so, and I have surrounded myself with other eccentrics. People who were born with some innate magic, who have a different way of seeing the world. There are degrees of this, you know. You have ignorant chavs on one end, and the Four Founders on the other, and there is some murkiness there in the middle where muggles listen to Led Zeppelin and burn incense. The world outside is full of Sibyl Trelawneys who were not quite delusional enough to be truly magical. I even occasionally allude to the truth, and my neighbours seem to think that I’m referring to a past history of drug abuse and general thuggery. I have found that by feigning an old interest in something called “Dungeons & Dragons”, I'm able to effectively dupe my neighbors into believing that I'm a garden-variety freak rather than stark raving.
To answer your earlier question, my holiday rituals will include lighting Hanukkah candles at the local interfaith charity, attending a midnight mass, and brewing the mead for a little “Druidic” (they’re ridiculous but well-intentioned and appreciative) Yule celebration. As I said, I'm content. If I ‘d been a squib, I suspect that this is exactly as I should have turned out. I’d have been a brute thug, watched my friends disappear to heroin and prison and knife fights, and then pulled myself together in the end and started over somewhere else.
It’s what none of them understand about muggles. It’s not that very different at all.
You must destroy this letter. I have no wish to relive the past, and I made amends as best I could. It’s not my chosen life anymore, and I want nothing to do with it beyond this subtle influence. Control, you might call it; this project will leave a mark, for good or ill, on how the war is remembered. I am not as disinterested in that as I believed. With that said, I still have the ability to hex or even maim you, and I will not hesitate to cheerfully do so if you breathe a word of this to anyone.
Also, cease patronizing me at once. Don’t think I haven’t seen what you’re doing, beginning with the ones least likely to offend me (Minerva did not offend – it’s rather sad to watch her sharp edges wear off) and progressing inexorably toward Potter. I expect his account, along with Ginevra’s, in your next post, and your swotty son’s in the post after that.
Sydney
December 14, 2022
Sydney,
I allowed Harry to tell Rose about Sirius and the shrieking shack. She shook and cried for fifteen minutes, and then said that if 'Grandpa James' hadn’t panicked at the last moment and saved 'Uncle Sev' (I'm sorry, I know – I protested when it began, but that's what James and Al call him), Voldemort might've won and she might never have been born. It was a terrible realization to see her have, and a little of her innocence is gone. I was sorry to be the one who had to take it away. It’s not easy to watch them grow up. I would never have dreamt up that tactic, but it was the one Harry used, so she would have heard it from James anyway. They are both completing the term chastened.
So Harry’s is attached. And I’ve been debating for a week or two whether or not I should remove the part where he talks about the Marauders. He claims the first war could have been won, and would have been, if certain rifts had been mended. If Snape rather than Pettigrew had been the fourth in that circle. He spends a lot of time on the reverse trajectories of the two – Pettigrew who became vile and evil without cause, and Snape who became just and good without encouragement, and his father and Sirius who befriended the wrong boy from the first.
And the damndest thing is, I think he’s right. So I suspect I’ll never hear from you again, because I know how you must think that’s lazy and revisionist history. And I’m sorry for it.
I’m so glad your life is your own now, and I’m glad that you sound so happy. That’s a gift, you know…to know that forgiveness and growth and change are inevitable and embrace them.
Best,
Hermione
December 20, 2022
Madam Granger,
I have received your latest correspondence and will set to work immediately on revisions. We shall both be too busy these next few weeks to communicate, but I will return these after the holiday.
Who is writing the preface?
Happy Christmas.
S.C.
December 22, 2022
Sydney,
Happy Christmas to you – and Hanukkah, Yule, and whatever else you celebrate. Saturnalia, maybe. Or some obscure Incan harvest festival. Rose and James seem to have learnt their lesson, or so Ginny tells me. We’ll all do Christmas at the Burrow and then they’ll come home with me for Boxing Day. Ron gets Christmas Eve to himself, so I’ve arranged a portkey to take me to Australia. My parents are in a home there and I don’t visit them often enough.
I was planning to ask Filius to write the preface after it’s complete. He’s the most neutral but well-respected party I could come up with, aside from a certain person who would never agree to do it.
I’ve enclosed a book for you – it’s one of my dad’s favorites. But I chose it because we started with the 18th century, when Gibbon wrote it, and because it’s the first book written using ‘modern’ historiography. By which I mean a reliance on primary sources and an effort not to dramatize. I think you’ll find it interesting.
Hermione
December 23, 2022
Hermione,
Since I know that you’re in Australia, and that you’ll receive this there, I decided to chance it.
Narcissa is the most appropriate person to write the preface. If you want to sell books, and if you want to change minds, you’ll ask her.
Sydney
December 24, 2022
Sydney,
I’m posting this before I leave for England. You can reply anytime after the second, when the kids will be gone. I had thought your enforced holiday silence was a bit paranoid until I received your package in Australia. It answered a million questions and created half as many more. I think I have a very clear picture now of how you came to be where you are, but I’m not sure how old 5th November himself manages to pull off looking like a common owl. The speed was the thing, you know, that made it obvious. I hate not knowing the answers, even though they’re personal and they’re yours.
Will you hate me if I say that I was really touched by your gift? My mum knew what it was immediately, and remembers playing a game with a wooden one in her great-uncle’s house when she was just a girl. Gimmel, Hay, Shin, and Nun. That’s what she said the characters were, although she can’t remember what they mean. Even so, the dreidel is so lovely. I haven’t seen her smile like that in ages. And she said she’d never seen one made of silver, or one that was well-balanced enough to spin that long. I didn’t tell her that I thought you’d subtly charmed it.
I wish someone had told me that it gets harder, not easier, to balance on the razor’s edge between that world and this one. When I was young, all I wanted was to grow up and be a real witch, to be accepted. But the older I get the more I feel like I cut off my roots to do it, and I won’t really thrive until I learn that the little girl who grew up in Market Harborough and wanted to be a barrister is still there. Only Harry really understands, and he doesn’t have many happy memories of muggle life. It’s been easier for him to close the door on it than it has for me. In that one small way, I sometimes wish that Harry and I could have been more than brother and sister. And then I remember that he’d be dead right now if we’d tried, because Harry’s always had the ability to really hurt me, and he would have done, even if only accidentally, and then I might’ve murdered the Boy Who Lived.
Is that a horrible thing to say about your best friend? Or is it more horrible that I’m admitting that I married Ron because of my two closest friends, he was the one that I loved less – the one who could still be my friend and partner if the rest of it went arse over tit. God, why am I telling you this? You must be ready to vomit reading this twaddle. It’s only the second year, though, that I’ve been alone tonight, and I’m lonely. I can’t tell anyone, because they’ll think I’m unhappy, and I’m not. It isn’t the same as unhappy – I like the choices I’ve made, and I think we’ve all handled this very maturely. Even Ron. But sometimes it all…I suppose I need a holiday somewhere. Somewhere warm, with sandy beaches and a soft breeze…somewhere where I’m not Hermione Granger-turned Weasley-turned-Granger-again. Somewhere where I’m not Kingsley Shacklebolt’s darling protégé, and the former Head of Magical Creatures, and the Boy-Who-Lived’s best friend. Sometimes I think that when the kids are on their own, I’ll move to Australia. I’ll live in some mixed muggle/magical neighborhood and write, and portkey home to see Rose and Hugo and visit libraries. I can write magical books without living in the spotlight and dealing with politics, and if I can make a living at it that’s what I plan to do.
I can just imagine it now. Articles in the Prophet. “Hermione Granger disappears – sources close to her say she’s working on a translation of Beedle the Bard. Ex-husband Ronald Weasley was quoted as saying, ‘Ha, ha! She is going to die in a book stack, alone, just like I said when we were thirteen!’ before succumbing to a latent hex.”
See, I could pick up some work with the Prophet, too, if there wasn’t that thorny conflict-of-interest issue. Not that the Wizarding World really has any notion of professional ethics, so I might be the only person who cares. You’ll probably tell me a Slytherin wouldn’t let personal distaste for a practice stop them. Hugo would.
Do you miss elderflower wine? I think I would if I couldn’t have it anymore. I’ve been drinking a bit too much of the stuff, but I’m being very productive so I’m not sure it’s a bad thing. I was so burnt out at the ministry. I reached the top and realized that it meant making sure that column F in Table 4 of Report 3.7 had been cross-referenced with the appropriate Wizengamot minutes. I didn’t even get to write the bloody reports anymore, or go out in the field. I was ‘too valuable to waste’. I was ‘the decision maker’. It was bloody awful. And there were so many rules and regulations that I couldn’t do what I needed to do for my staff, so I was watching all these bright young minds slowly die. When it got to the point that the most fulfilling part of my career was writing the reference letters that got my valuable people out of that hellhole, I realized that it was time to take a sabbatical. And I’m considering making it permanent.
Mazel Tov. You’ve lived long enough to see one of your students have a mid-life crisis.
What do I want? How can I be the best mother I can be without losing myself? I want Rose and Hugo to see me as I am. I want them to know the muggle part too, and all the pieces I shut down to make Ron happy and get ahead in my career. How do I make sure my kids turn out alright?
I’ll ask Narcissa when I go to fetch Scorpious. That’s brilliant – a brilliant suggestion. Did I ever tell you how brilliant you are? Always were, actually, even when you were writing those hateful things in my margins. Brilliant and dangerous and underneath it all really brave and good. I think you’d be my hero if you weren’t my friend. I hope Guy the Grumpy Owl makes it back with the package. Happy Christmas.
Love,
Hermione
December 27, 2022
Sydney,
Sweet Merlin, this is the first chance I’ve had to catch my breath since Christmas Eve. I know you won’t respond, but I wanted to write to tell you I’m sorry, because I was a little squiffy and sentimental the other day and I think I might have written things I normally wouldn’t. I’d rather you just pretend it never happened, but please don't return my gift a second time. Even Gunpower, Treason and Plot has a limit; Felix is hard to come by and the vial is the one I was holding the night the Half Blood Prince locked me in his office to save my life, and as such it's an expensive gift with priceless sentimental value.
Also, Narcissa and I spoke this morning, and I think she was actually touched! We’ve never really talked before now, but she said that Andromeda told her about the project and she was honored to be asked to contribute. So I got one of the Black sisters after all, and I got the closest thing to a Slytherin member of the Order of the Phoenix I could. Closest aside from Professor Snape, who is on the Other Side and won’t be speaking from beyond the grave.
But his whispers have a way of carrying down the wind.
Luna’s submission is attached. I think it needs no work, but I’ll defer to your more critical eye. Hugo’s interview with Ron is also attached, and I beg you to do the editing on this one. I haven’t even looked at it – I’m too close to it to be an unbiased eye.
Best,
Hermione
January 3, 2022
Granger,
Where are you expected to be next week?
S.C.
January 4, 2022
S-,
Here. Why?
Hermione
January 5, 2022
Granger,
I will be…somewhere. Somewhere where there are books, and an inn, and an interesting story. I would prefer to deliver Potter’s contribution in person.
If you are amenable to the suggestion, I will owl you a portkey.
I am leaving my life in your hands by doing this. I will be armed, and I will not allow you to murder me when I inform you that your son has the rhetorical skills of a fourteen-year old.
S.C.
January 6, 2022
S-,
Are you serious? I promise to behave myself. I promise. No intrusive questions, no Aurors, no one will know. You can langlock me if I start babbling – Merlin, you invented that spell because of people like me, didn’t you? – and I’ll bind myself with whatever sort of oath you wish.
Hugo is thirteen until the end of May, so I’ve chosen to take the latter comment as a compliment on his obvious maturity for his age.
Hermione
January 8, 2022
Granger,
I am quite serious, although only a foolish Gryffindor wouldn’t pause to question my motives. It might be that I wish to discuss things – things in Potter’s article – which are best not written down. Or I may have finally found a way to avenge myself for various crimes committed against my person over the decades. I may even be planning to hold ransom someone whom Potter would pay dearly to have returned.
You consider only how far my trust of you must extend, and do not stop to question how far your trust of me ought to go. It is a miracle you have survived this long without a keeper.
S.C.
January 9, 2022
S-,
That is the biggest load of bollocks I’ve ever read from you. Of course I wouldn’t just portkey off with someone I didn’t know and trust.
I know you of old, and you always end with a jade’s trick. But you’ve never let me down, and there were plenty of opportunities for you to wash your hands of me.
How many days? And how shall I dress?
Hermione
January 10, 2022
Granger,
I am here now. You may activate the portkey with your wand, and it will operate for you and you alone. You’ll find yourself in the vestry of a church, so you may want to act the part of a confused tourist if you are found. I will be across the square at the inn, and I will meet you in the pub down below. Bring reading material. You will be left waiting as I am not going to waste time sitting in a pub all day.
You may stay as long as you wish. It’s not terribly expensive, but bring a bank card or enough Euros for however many days you plan to be here. I would rather not be the only one with muggle identification, but I don’t know that you have any. Dress for a temperate climate in a muggle city. I am working here; this is not a holiday.
S.C.
January 18, 2023
H -
Assure me you arrived home safely.
S.
January 19, 2023
S,
That was amazing. Just amazing. I didn’t know anything about the Albegensians or Beziers. What a horrible, bloody history! I wish I knew what blog you were writing for, but I won’t invade your privacy that much. I’m sure whatever you do with all the information we dug up will be amazing and earth-shattering. So you’re a lay historian. How could I not have known?
I still think you could have prepared me a bit better for the visual shock. I was not anticipating a tattooed man with a queue in a No Future t-shirt. I wish you would’ve told me that you’ve become someone out of a Nick Hornby novel, grumbling because the pub didn’t have trivia in your Lancashire drawl. But I do agree that Oxfam has sold out a bit over the years. And I don’t like the monarchy either, even if I’m not quite an anarchist. You just put me off guard by talking about it – nobody ever cares to discuss the differences between the muggle and magical worlds with me. The first time my magic showed is when I blew up the telly over Live Aid. I mean, there I was, just come home from my riding lesson, sitting there in a Georgian terrace in Market Harborough, and there were children dying because they didn’t have food. It just made me so angry at the adults who were letting it happen. I think my parents were sort of glad when I went off to Hogwarts, since it meant I stopped making them write Amnesty petitions about Pinochet’s regime. There’s so much prejudice and hate and brokenness in the world, and we can’t any of us fix all of it. Maybe that’s what it means to grow up. You have your little corner, and you do the best you can in it. And you let the rest go.
We’re almost at the end of this project, but I know exactly what I want to work on next. I’m not just going to translate Beedle the Bard – I’m going to try to get at the history behind the legends. The Deathly Hallows were real, but the story is all couched in mythology and legend. There must be primary sources, and they must have something relevant to say.
What do you think? Am I crazy to attempt it?
I suppose what I mean is – will you help? Because I’m not sure I can manage to do it justice without you.
Best,
Hermione
January 21, 2022
Hermione,
It appears that there remain some small tidbits of general knowledge that you are not acquainted with. Wonders will never cease.
I know better than to comment on a lady’s age, and how she may or may not resemble my memory of the girl she once was. You are – and appear to be – a sensible, competent woman.
I blew up a telly once too. It was over a Man City loss to Arsenal, but the principle was the same. It was to stop a riot from breaking out. Someday I’ll tell you the story, but in short; one of the blokes thought my mum was a posh bint and told my father as much, and it almost came to knives. It’s probably the reason I hate sports in general, and football in particular. And just one of the myriad reasons I detest Quidditch. There are too many to list on that score.
When are you giving the completed manuscript to Narcissa? When must she have the preface finished in order to release the book before the 25th Year Memorial?
S.
January 23, 2023
S,
Why won’t your would-be owl accept the letters if I spell out your name as I called you in Spain? It’s like it understands my intent. If I refer to The Name in the abstract, it allows it. But if I address you in any concrete way, then I have to revise it before your bloody bird will accept it. I know you probably burn all of these anyway, so what does it matter? Are you afraid your ‘common owl’ is going to burst into flames and drop the letter somewhere over Diagon Alley if we inscribe the ineffable?
You don’t send him out on burning days, do you?
Merlin, Minerva would die if she knew that you were living in Blackpool with the Bird Who Can Also Not Be Named. I know of no reason why treason should ever be forgot. Albus Dumbledore was an ironic old coot, wasn’t he, with a keen eye for the absurd. Light a bonfire under the Ministry. It took me a long time to see how revolutionary he was, and what a committed anarchist he allied himself with in our Potions master.
Is there any authority you can tolerate?
Next week – I hope to put the manuscript in her hands next week. I must have it returned by Easter Break if it’s to be released at the end of the April. I gave myself a very conservative deadline because I knew that delays would pop up. I just didn’t realize how big they’d be, or how surprising.
Best,
Hermione
January 25, 2023
Hermione,
I have sputtered over my tea again, and it’s a damned shame, because it’s small-batch organically-grown and it is a luxury I cannot afford to waste.
I can tolerate anything but your sense of humour. Most people would say that is because I do not possess one.
I will make you a deal. In a few years, when Minerva has gone completely over to her dotage and no one believes anything she says, you may tell her some fantastical theory about portrait enchantments. I will even allow you to paint a picture for her, provided it is not overly specific, of things which might have happened.
Everyone will think she is bat-shit crazy, of course, and that is nine-tenths my reasoning for allowing it.
I fear that when her all-portraits-together-at-last fantasy finally does materialize, she will spend the first few centuries attempting to strangle her two immediate predecessors. Black described sentience without tactile sensation, so I should think the pain won’t be intolerable. He certainly survived being asphyxiated in the Handbag of Death. You never did tell me what they told you when you interviewed them.
In return, you must promise not to allow Potter to attempt to install portraits where they should not be installed in the immediate aftermath of Minerva’s demise.
This is another of those letters you ought to immediately destroy. I cannot tell why I trust you this far, but I do.
S2
January 28, 2023
S2,
You’re mental, but we have a deal.
Black and Dumbledore, yes. I didn’t think you’d want to hear what either of them had to say. They shared a lot of what happened during the last year of the war. They made me swear not to repeat most of it, and said that it was only to help lend perspective to my work. They certainly didn’t want to be quoted. It was interesting to hear the other side of a conversation I never realized you and I were having. I wish you’d trusted me more back then, because it would have been a comfort to know you were guarding our flank. I think I also understand most of the reasons why you couldn’t take that risk.
It’s part of the reason I went to see Mum and Dad. Now that I’m a parent myself, the full magnitude of what I did lays heavy on my heart. To send them away like that – Rose will be seventeen next year. And she still seems like such a baby. I don’t regret anything I did, but I wouldn’t want my children to be put in the same position. In retrospect, I can’t fathom how far in over our heads we both were, Harry and I. And you as well, I guess, although at least you had some wisdom and experience to be getting on with.
And that’s not even true. I do regret some things. I regret that I wasn’t kinder to people who weren’t on my side, or didn’t seem to be. I don’t regret punching Draco, though. He deserved it.
I’m sorry for all those times I did things that weren’t deserved. It was a lifetime ago, wasn’t it? I was a child, and I can’t imagine being as naïve and innocent as I was back then. Life rubs all the hard edges away if you give it long enough.
I’m older now than you were when I knew you. Have you realized that?
Love,
Hermione
February 3, 2023
Granger,
I have a music festival to attend starting the 7th, and pets are not welcome. At least mine would not be.
I will return on the 13th and hope to see an outline for The Tale of the Three Brothers when I do. You cannot sit round drinking wine and ruminating; it is bad for one’s health. If you intend to freelance, you must dust yourself off and begin your next project.
Otherwise, you will turn into Minerva.
Also, a bit of professional advice. You do not mix well with depressives, particularly alcohol, and narcotics are a destructive escape. I would suggest a modest hallucinogenic if you feel the need to experiment, nothing stronger than a tincture of Kava or a mild dose of peyote. Anything more and you will go the way of a Lovegood and be absolutely useless for practical purposes.
S.C.
February 4, 2023
S2,
Next time, I want to go with you. A music festival – that sounds amazing.
My mum and dad took me to a Pink Floyd concert when I was five. I can still sort of remember it…bits of it, at least. They had to be the oldest people there, but my mum was a big fan of Germaine Greer and my dad was still sort of trapped in his Yardbirds phase. They were very open-minded. I think they became dentists so that they could have their own nitrous dispenser.
Anyway, I once played some Pink Floyd for Harry and we laughed for hours. There’s no dark sarcasm in the classroom, didn’t you know?
I’ve never tried anything stronger than firewhiskey or Dreamless Sleep.
I don’t quite know how to soften this, but are you a drug addict? Your knowledge of this seems extensive.
Hermione
February 6, 2023
Granger,
Piss off. I'll be comfortably numb if I want to. Also, babysit my owl if you don't mind; he gets lonely.
S2
February 12, 2023
S2,
Oh my. I know I shouldn't risk a letter while you're away, but Narcissa’s preface is attached, and it’s just…it’s just amazing. I’m speechless, and no description would do it justice.
She just summed up beautifully why the Order was right – but she did it from the perspective of someone who didn’t believe in their methods. She hated Dumbledore for how he treated her house, but in the end she saw Harry was the only sane choice.
Why haven’t we been listening to her all along?
I hope the music fest is going well. That’s a long time for a festival, isn’t it? I thought they were usually just enough for a mini-break. What kind of music do you like? It can’t all be the Sex Pistols and Kate Bush, can it? I’m so envious of you – you have such an exciting life. But I hope you’re being cautious about illicit substances. Dependence is not something to trifle with.
You will have your outline of The Three Brothers next week. I am done being maudlin.
Hermione
February 14, 2023
Dear Mother,
I am home from Amsterdam, and I did nothing that is illegal in that country. A bit of a holiday does not a substance-abuser make. Power was always my temptation, and I am in no danger of succumbing to it. If I start attending political meetings or being friendly with people, you might have cause for concern.
Don’t insult me by alluding to the Sex Pistols. They were middle-class, middle-England quasi-punks and I abhor them. If you want punk, try The Buzzcocks or Daniel Four. I begin to fear that your appreciation of muggle 'music' extends no further than Eric Clapton and Coldplay.
No one listened to Cissy because no one cared to ask her opinion.
S
February 15, 2023
S –
Your sodding not-an-owl won’t take anything with your actual name on it, and I’m tired of pretending you're Sydney. It’s a stupid name, and that book is utter rubbish. Dickens writes sentences so long you could strangle someone with them.
“I see the lives for which I lay down my life, peaceful, useful, prosperous and happy, in that England which I shall see no more.”
See? Rubbish. You know what he should have seen in his happy little mirror of destiny? He should have seen Lucie’s son’s best friend making a complete jackass of himself by proposing to his girlfriend in front of his ex-wife and children at a Valentine’s Ball. I handled it very well, if I say so myself, and refrained from hexing immediately and from drinking until I arrived home.
Old Ogden and I are quite cozy here in the wee hours of the morning, but this shit burns, doesn’t it? I don’t think I have a professional career as a drunk in me at all, and that’s probably for the best.
Merlin, I wish you were really a muggle. I wish I didn’t know you had access to the Prophet, which you obviously do, and I wish I didn’t think that The Incident was going to make the papers, but it will. So you may as well hear it from me first. Bear with me, alright? At least read through to the end, and then you can pop over and obliviate me. Please.
We’ve gone to this thing every year since Minerva began it, so that makes twenty years thereabouts. It’s a fundraiser for Hogwarts, alumni and students working together to shore up the endowment. It really helped in the recovery, the extra funds, and it was a brilliant idea. The Valentine’s theme is understated, and it’s so terribly formal and proper that no one ever has any fun at them, but we all dutifully attend year after year. I don’t know why I’m telling you this, since you’ve probably extrapolated all the details correctly already.
So there we are, Harry and Ginny, Hannah and Neville, George and Angelina, Ron and Portia (newly engaged), Luna and Rolf. Blaise Zabini. Me.
And then somehow they all decided, in unison, that Blaise and I were meant to be, and I shouldn’t be alone for the rest of my life, which is insulting but not unexpected. Except they dosed us with something. George. I’m fairly sure it was George. I don’t know what the potion was, but it felt like mild Veritaserum. Not restricted, probably, but skirting the edge of legality. And also, how stupid can they all be? We’ve known Blaise for decades, and they can’t figure out that I don’t have the necessary anatomical bits to be one of his love interests? I mean, at this rate, I wonder if they know Dumbledore was a pouf, and he wore lavender sodding robes!
You will obliviate me when I’m done, won’t you? Otherwise I’ll have to figure out a way to perform the spell on myself. I hope you know that sometimes when you’re friends with someone you say things you regret and then you’re really, really sorry for ever saying them. And sometimes you feel things maybe you shouldn’t, things that aren’t really rational or workable, just a little tug of what-if speculation. What if things had been a little different than they are? But it doesn’t really mean anything, and it doesn’t have to make anything different, and you’re sorry for thinking it.
Anyway, George was just trying to loosen us up, I think, but I was already a bit miffed that Ron had the gall to make his engagement into a public spectacle and Blaise was standing my back. And then Ron started flapping his mouth about how I was so smart that men were afraid of me and since Blaise wasn’t intimidated maybe he should have a go, and that shagging a member of the Order could only help his career. And normally – and by normally, I mean if there hadn’t been a potion involved – Blaise would have said something cruel and devastating and then waltzed me away.
But instead he told Ron that the only member of the Order he'd ever wanted to shag was his own Head of House, and then…oh Merlin, just a lot of other things that were completely shocking and hilarious and I thought Ron and Harry were going to wet themselves and it was the funniest thing I’ve ever seen. Slytherin was a lot more interesting than we all thought, and that's saying something.
You think Hugo’s alright, don’t you? I mean, the orgies were Death Eater parties, not something that’s endemic to the house, weren’t they? Blaise said his Head was always putting an end to them, and I don’t have quite that much confidence in Sinistra.
Here’s the part I wish I could take back…the part that I don’t want you to read anywhere else first. When Blaise was done eviscerating Ron, and causing a scandal, George turned to me and asked if I was alright. And then I said – so they tell me, because I still can’t believe the words came out of my mouth – that I was fine, and that it was nice to know that Blaise and I have the same taste in Slytherins and a similar fantasy life.
But I didn’t mean I had some horrible dungeon fantasy that I was still holding over from childhood, which is probably how the papers will report it. I swear that not once has the thought ever crossed my mind. I just meant now, I suppose, now that we’re all grown up, if things had been different. I don’t know what I mean, actually. I haven’t actually violated your trust, and no one would ever be the wiser, but I still feel like I’ve let you down. Muddied the waters, somehow, and I didn’t want to do that.
You’re too dear a friend to lose this way, but I think a round of Obliviate the Dunderhead is the best recourse available.
I’ve saved all of your letters, even the ones you asked me to destroy. They’re in a box in the cupboard over the sink, and the spell to find it is “Chacal”. When you take my memories, you may take your words back as well.
Here’s a thank-you gift. Jane Eyre. Have you ever read it? If you should ever call, I will come.
Thank you for letting me be your Seamstress. Thank you for that gift, and the gift of your friendship, however ill I guarded it.
In case you haven’t broken my Fidelius yet, Hermione Granger lives at 14 Royal Crescent, Bath.
Hermione
February 15, 2023
Granger, have you regained your senses?
February 15, 2023
Have just got some sleep and can’t believe I sent that without thinking it through first or waiting for the morning edition. Blaise Zabini, Deputy Head of the Department of Mysteries, admitted he was a homosexual and recounted his wastral years of buggering Theo Nott while Draco and Pansy observed. No one even realizes what I said.
I am completely humiliated, but is it really necessary to Obliviate me? Is there any way we can just put this behind us and move on, like two adults, even if one of them made a fool of herself?
To be frank, I can't bear the thought of losing what we do have, even knowing what it can't ever be.
February 16, 2023
Hermione,
What if I told you that Sydney Carlton watched The Seamstress face the executioner without flinching, and it gave him the courage he needed to mount the steps of the scaffold? What if I told you that he learned to love her a bit in those moments at the end?
The audacity of waltzing into the most secure building on the Isle, dressed as the Dark Lord’s ingénue, still reeling from months in the cold without food or contact or encouragement, only just recovered from being tortured by a psychotic bitch - it was astounding. I thought Dumbledore was mad to leave it in the hands of children, but I never gave those children the credit they were due. I was forced to accept you as my equal toward the end; in fact, I was desperate to believe that I was not alone. Have you not yet realized that you were my partner even then – that a portrait in a bag bound us together during the darkest moments of our lives?
I will not visit your home. I will not risk discovery. I have my reasons, but chief among them is that I’m content with my life as it is, and I am my own master at last. You should know that before we speak of anything else. You have friends and children who can never know about me, responsibilities that you cannot skive off. If you cannot be content to steal into my world without either of us needing to be in each other’s pockets at all times, there is nothing to discuss.
I wanted to kiss you when you said goodbye in Beziers. I would have done, if I’d known I could have got away with it.
Here is another portkey. If you consider the ramifications and still want to discuss this, then use it. It will bring you to my flat. If I’m not there, make yourself at home (within reason). Don’t let the cat out of the bedroom no matter how much it mewls – it doesn’t get along with the bird. Don’t touch anything but the kettle in the kitchen, and for God’s sake don’t read any of the enchanted books. My patron left his ‘cousin’ some very Dark texts, and they shouldn’t be handled lightly. They’re property of the Half-Blood Prince, and you know how dangerous he was. Consider your options carefully.
If you decide that you’d rather let the past lie as it fell, then send me your notes on Beetle the Bard and we’ll continue as we have.
S.