Chapter Text
JAMES POV
Once again I had a nightmare about Alyssa being in danger and not making out what was going on I wondered if I was making noises whilst I was asleep cause I eventually woke up and saw Declan hovering over me looking concern “Whats wrong you been restless in your sleep?” I didn’t know whether to even bother telling him after what happened yesterday. I really needed to start asking him questions about him like what he was suffering from? What happened to his mother? Why he seemed determined to make me his subject for his writing?.
“Nothing…..”
“Ok then I’m just concern that’s all you were all over the place” his phone pinged and he reached over to the side table and looked at it. I watched his expression and then he typed something and sent it away. “You seemed pretty attached to your phone….I take it nothing from the police still” Declan stretched his limbs and leaned over and given me a kiss on the head. “You feel like going out today?” he then got out of bed after spending most of yesterday avoiding him the night together there wasn’t any interactions I was still mad at him I wanted to keep my distance. I didn’t say much at all I went about making dinner, cleaning and we showered separately.
“Where are we going?” I asked as he was already in the process of getting dressed I bit my lip I watched he could tell I was staring at him. He had a body I would love to have I shifted in the bed and looked away from him. I did find him very attractive could I see myself being with him for good I don’t know anymore. I spent about three days with him and already see so many sides to him that it was hard for to understand how he functions at all.
“Declan I think we need to talk...I want to know about you I think that’s fair don’t you” I waited for the response though he wasn’t quick to give me one. I got out of bed and started to grab my clothes eventually Declan replied “Ok...James. What you want to know?” he sounded irritated now as he put his shirt on and sat down on the bed to put his shoes on. “Whats the medication treating?” he finished off tie up his shoes laces and looked at me “I have Bi polar….if you wonder why I’m snap at you or sound depressed cause that’s what I go through every day. The medication suppose to control it to a point where I’m not out of control” that answered my question, it answered a lot of things though I hated to ask him more questions.
“Have you suffer from it for a while?”
“Yes….” he replied flatly as he stood up and walked over to me and stared at me as I already in my clothes “Ok….” Declan pulled me into his arms and held me for a while I allowed it his hands stayed on the outside of my clothes and soon he let me go and walked away out of the room. I still thinking about Alyssa being in danger was this dream like a premonition I didn’t really believe that sort of thing. It was some time before I decided to come downstairs Declan seemed to had eaten a bowl of cereal I noticed the box was left out on the bench and the empty bowl in the sink. I cleaned it and put it away and stood there in the kitchen I heard no noises at all.
“Declan?” I called and came out of the kitchen no reply, I went into the lounge it was empty I started to feeling something was wrong. Then I decided to look out the front window to see that his car was gone, I realised I was alone in the house. I started looking around and notice his laptop I never really looked at it then I remembered the gun he pulled out of the desk drawer. I opened the drawers and looked to notice the weapon is gone. This wasn’t a good sign at all I had to find out about his condition and whatever he is been writing about me for.
I opened the laptop and noticed it was idle sitting though as soon as I moved the mouse the screen saver went and showed a document of text. This must have been the book he was trying to write I noticed a lot of the stuff I said and he seemed to try and break down it psychologically I then clicked onto another window and saw a message he must have typed out for me. I read it and I felt utter wave of panic hit me, he says his no longer wanted to continue our courtship and that it was over.
“oh….fuck.. no” I shifted away from the desk and realised I had no idea where he went. He taken the car and left me alone with no way of reaching him. I broke down I honestly should just grab my stuff and leave I didn’t think Declan was going to come to the conclusion that he didn’t want to live anymore. I clearly wasn’t enough of a reason for him and it hurt me deeply.
--------------------------------------------------------------
ALYSSA POV
I swear every time I closed my eyes I saw James face this time I saw Bonnie’s that scared me. I didn’t know what today was going to be like but knowing Bonnie is in Jame’s car and her wanted to talk to me. Something about it was off and now I’m wonder if I was right to not believe her. What if she does know about James whereabouts or something else that could be much bigger. After I got myself ready my mother was once again needed my help with the twins I honestly just wanted to take the car and drive off.
“Alyssa where are you going?” she asked I honestly didn’t want to talk to her my mind was now focus on Bonnie and finding her. “Out” I just said and slammed the front door behind me, all I could is walk and hope so how I run into her. I highly doubt she knew where I live so I had no idea where to go. Mother hadn’t come after me she stuck with the twins, finally some sort of freedom I use to have though I shared that with James. After walking for awhile I paused and then heard a car coming I turned and saw it was Bonnie. She saw me and pulled the car over to the curb and stopped.
“Alyssa….get in” Bonnie gestured to the passenger door which I decided to open I looked inside no sign of anything dangerous I quickly opened the glove box which she didn’t seem to mind though she given me an odd look. No sign of a gun or anything but she could be having it on herself or backpack. “You getting in the car?” I did and I closed the door and started to drive again. “What you know about James? How did you end up with his car? Where is he?” the questions I fired at her though I never pry into how she ended out of prison in the first place.
“Those questions all connect to one person, oddly enough the one person who got me out of jail” Bonnie kept her eyes on the road as I waited for a name. “you going to tell me who?” I arched a brow as she sighed “His name is Declan Koch….I couldn’t believe it that Clive Koch was married at one point that he knocked up a woman who ended up having a child of his. To think he left his wife and child to go and well you know…..I was foolish to think he was a decent man” just my luck James is stuck with the child of the mad man he killed to save me. No wonder whenever I looked at that guy I saw Clive’s face staring at me. “Why did Declan get you released for?” Bonnie again remained focused on the road clearly she was taking me somewhere “He knew about my relations with his father, that he wanted to pick my brain about what made me want to become a psychopath. Might explain why he is interested in James cause he wants to write a book about what makes people want to kill” that seemed to make sense but also it was scaring me knowing that James was the a guinea pig in an experiment.
“You don’t feel the need to get revenge on me and James? How do I know this Declan isn’t trying to do that and he got you involved to try and do some of the dirty work” things were starting to become more complicated as I had more questions. “I don’t feel the need to get revenge...I’m more than willing to help you get James back before something bad happens to him” Clearly Bonnie has had a change of heart now I’ll believe her words she seemed calm it was then I realised where she drove to Clive Koch's house. The nightmare was there forever for me and now I noticed someone inside the house at the front window. I couldn’t make them out before I knew the front door opened and James came rushing out and halted in his tracks. “Alyssa!!” he cried I got out of the car and went over to him and hugged him.
“James you ok? Where’s this Declan guy!” I noticed that James was upset and distressed then he saw Bonnie and backed up and saw his car. “My car! Where the hell did you find it?” he went over to it and checked it over. Bonnie looked at me and then at James “I’m glad you have come cause Declan has disappeared…. I’m scared” that wasn’t I thought and then he looked at Bonnie again “Bonnie…… what the hell you doing out of jail….. with my car…...” James obvious didn’t know what was going on here.
“James calm down...”
“I need to find Declan and stop him from ending it” James went over to the drivers side and got in Bonnie and I climbed into the car I took the front seat and she sat in the back. “I want answers to my questions Bonnie!” Bonnie jumped at James outburst as I could tell he was clearly upset. James started up the car and we pulled away from the house into the street and drove along James gripped the steering wheel as he fought back tears he was very upset “Declan visited me, he got me released I was allowed to go on good behaviour. Then his plan was for me to steal your car and keep you from leaving. He was using this as way to get into the mind of a psychopath, He clearly was using you James and me...for his book content” Bonnie said as James realised Declan lied about calling the police, he never called the cops at all about his car.
“Oh my god...he been communicating with you…...all the text messages he was constantly checking his phone and stuff. Alyssa I’m so sorry for leaving you in the first place” James was struggling now I didn’t know if he could keep it together cause he looked like he been through a lot in a short period of time. “James had Declan done anything to you?” I had to know if James was alright I couldn’t tell if this Declan guy was malice or not. “I was a foolish Alyssa to leave you, I couldn’t wait anymore I was bored. After spending time with Declan he was clearly disturbed yet very lonely. We had a fight he tried to get into my head. He made think about the past to try and get psychopath side of me to expose itself. I didn’t know what else he had plan me to do. It was bad….yet I had feelings for him” James started crying now I wanted to comfort him maybe be better if he didn’t drive in this state.
“Bonnie could you please try and find out where Declan could have gone” Bonnie began tending to her phone “Can I take over the driving like I was before, James clearly needs time to settle down” James soon pulled the car over and parked it. Bonnie got out of the car and James reluctantly moved into the back seat I decided to move to the back to be with him. “Cant believe what is happening…...” James stuttered as he leaned against me I never seen him so upset. I think the last time I saw him this upset was when were waiting for Bonnie get out of the chemist. We fought over how I didn’t care that James was stuck in hospital after being shot in the side. I never visited him at all, the fact it had left him crippled and took months and months for him to recover from. He put his life on the line to protect me I didn’t seem to care I was stupid back then.
“James everything is going to be ok...will find him” I said as I comforted him first time in a while since we been this close. I had no idea where Bonnie was taking us but some how I had a feeling she knew since Declan had been messaging her as to whether Declan was going to do self harm himself I don’t know. The ride felt long but soon enough we were venturing into familiar territory the ocean was not far from where were driving along the country road heading towards where Alyssa father lived.
Though Bonnie pulled off the main road onto a dirt track and drove down it “Look where we are Alyssa….” James said I noticed the landscape soon enough we came to end of the track and there was Declan’s car parked.
--------------------------------------------------------------
JAMES POV
Being with Alyssa again some what felt like being home. I couldn't help reflect on the last two or three days that Declan had sparked something inside me. Something I desired so much though if only he wasn’t suffering from a mental illness. He wasn’t a bad person though he wasn’t the right person I should have been with. I connected with him he made me feel what I wanted to feel loved, desired and needed. The things that Alyssa had neglected for too long I felt torn. Why must Declan be like this? I prayed he hadn’t decided to end his life.
I checked the car out it was empty I then went into the glove and notice the knife was sitting there untouched but no sign of the gun. I grabbed the knife and started to run over the hill I saw the ocean stretched out before me. All I could hope was not to see Declan’s body lying on the sand. The tide had came in there was no muddiness stretching into the horizon which meant Declan was restricted to the shore line that’s if he didn’t walk into the waves and killed himself.
I looked around and soon enough I saw a body couple metres away lying on the sand motionless. I couldn’t stop myself from fearing the worst I headed over to it behind me Alyssa and Bonnie had reached the sands I wasn’t aware of what was going on between them. I soon reached and hovered Declan’s body it was then I broke down “No…..no…..” I cried though wasn’t aware of what was going to happen next. “JAMES!!!” Alyssa cried I whirled around and saw Bonnie armed with a gun and Alyssa was in her grip something wasn’t right at all Alyssa was being held at gun point and then I felt something pressed into the back of me “Surprise…...” I heard Declan’s guttural voice as I stood still I had the knife but I concealed carefully away in my pocket lucky it folded in on itself.
“Declan..I thought you killed yourself…..”
“Oh no James I decided it was time to try and speed up the separation process here. Bonnie been very co operative with me” Declan gestured with his head at Bonnie who pressed the gun into her head. It was a trap and we fell into it now both me and Alyssa were stuck at gun point fearing for the end. “Declan you can’t do this, its a crime your committing here you will end up in prison….” I said confidently though he moved the gun to the side of my head. I felt his arm wrapped around me holding me against him. He moved his face to the other side planting a kiss on me cheek “I might...then I’m feeling such adrenaline right now..” Declan’s breath assaulted my ear it was almost erotic yet I couldn’t resist it.
“Your were very gullible to fall for this” Bonnie said as Alyssa looked terrified she saw how Declan was toying over me.
“I thought you changed Bonnie, after all that time behind bars. Clearly you still seemed to want to get rid of me cause of what happened to your lover” Alyssa spat at her she twisted her wrist though Bonnie sent a kick to the back of her leg and Alyssa was shoved onto her knees. “Declan call Bonnie off Alyssa, if you want to kill someone you can kill me” Declan nuzzled his head against mine he looked at Bonnie who was waiting for a signal.
I couldn’t risk pulling out the knife cause he would had a load gun now “James are you regretting not killing Alyssa when you had the chance…..” Declan was now toying with me I tried to not listen to his voice “I don’t have any regrets even if I did I would been murderer stuck behind bars now feeling remorse” I said between gritted teeth though Declan then yelled “Bonnie shoot her” he said as Bonnie pulled Alyssa off the ground and started to dragging her away “JAMES!!” she cried them a gun fired I winced and heard the deafening sound in my ear but it wasn’t Bonnie pulling the trigger. It was Declan and the bullet shot Bonnie down in the back of the head Alyssa was in shock she escaped Bonnie who fallen face into the sands dead.
Alyssa stayed where she was she didn’t dare move cause Declan was still armed and the fact he shot Bonnie down it could be the case he could shoot her. “You killed… Bonnie….” I stuttered in fear as he moved the gun away from my head “I wonder if this how you felt when you killed someone….this going to be good addition to my book” I wanted to punch Declan in the face though the fact that Alyssa was unharmed made me wondered if he accepted my relations with her. It dawned me now this was the nightmare I had it was a lucid dream that actually happened before my eyes though Declan was still armed but he had backed off from me and turned to face him.
“You are cold, heartless, you manipulated Bonnie into your scheme only just to kill her” I spat at him with anger coursing through my veins I didn’t feel fearful now.
“So...your problems solved” he said smugly
“What was the point of dragging Bonnie out of jail to only kill her...she didn’t deserved that none of us deserve this!!” I couldn't bring myself to make a move the gun was still in his possession. I didn’t know what Alyssa was doing I hope common sense has her calling the police on her phone. Declan didn’t seem to understand the ramifications that had happened “You will go to jail you will realise the nightmare you going to be stuck in now. You are so foolish Declan….” Declan faced did twisted he looked like he was pain the words I said had got to him “Remember how I said it be nice if we died together… lets make that happen shall we” Declan raised the gun up, I had to do something but I didn’t want to harm Declan in the process or myself.
“Declan stop this and think what about your family? And me. You ignited something inside me I thought I was never going to feel. It makes me feel so sad that its just all a huge miss understanding” I said as he was pressing the gun into the side of his head. This was killing me inside I might had liked Declan, and deep down he liked me he even thought I loved him I never dare utter that to him. “SHUT UP!” Declan cried though his hand was shaking I wanted to try and calm him down make him reconsider pulling the trigger. “Declan please put the gun down you don’t need to do this” I begged I couldn’t tell what Alyssa was doing though I hope Declan attention was on me. I pray and hope the police were coming as fast as they could.
Declan was shaking I could tell he looked completely shattered, he looked past me at Alyssa and then down at Bonnie’s body. “When you said you couldn’t love me...it hurt me hard I thought we had something. You said it made you feel things that you hadn’t felt. I could have given you what you wanted” Declan was slowly giving up he was coming to his senses. I watched him he soon given up on the gun and let it fall to the ground I really wanted to hug him at least now the gun was out of his possession behind me Alyssa heard the sound of sirens the police had come, I backed away from him though look of devastation on his face.
The police soon descended onto the beach and they came over to where me and Declan stood. They also were tending to Bonnie’s body everything had came to end the police picked up the gun from the ground and placed it into a bag and Declan surrendered but they also pulled me away. I saw the female detectives the ones from the first stint we had they were surprised to see it was us again. The police man brought me over and yet kept a hold on me “James is innocent here….Declan the one who shot Bonnie” Alyssa pleas as the policeman let me go I looked at Alyssa and she looked at me.
“Right we will still need to take you two in to file a report” the detective said as we both knew what was going to happen. Bonnie body was taken away in a body bag and I watched as Declan was hand cuffed he looked at me though he wasn’t putting up much of a fight against the police directing him into the back of the police car. “What about the car?” the detective looked over at the vehicle and ordered one of her men to take that away.
“We will take care of everything, for now just need you to co operate and we will require give your testimonies” Alyssa held my hand, the hand that was scar from the time I shoved it into a deep fryer. “He wont be going to jail...he suffers from a mental health condition. His mother is in hospital he hadn’t seen her...his grandmother is worried about him” I couldn’t stop myself talking though whatever I say to the detective I don’t know if it will be taken into account.
“Ok I understand but for now we have a dead body, a scene which Alyssa described as being kidnapped and held at gun point. As to whether Declan had acted in self defence or intent to commit manslaughter we have to decided that” the woman said in understanding firm tone she was doing her job. It was still hard for me to accept that this was how it was going to end. If Declan was a different person I might have had a relationship with him and forgotten about Alyssa, in the end Alyssa was forever going to be the person I’ll want to be with.
“We weren’t aware of being kidnapped...we knew Bonnie from prior incident we didn’t expect what to happen occur” Alyssa spoke as we were led back over the hill towards the where all the cars were parked. It was clear whatever Declan had in mind wasn’t meant to have played out so wrongly. Unless he really did have malice intents to hurt us so he could experience the whole idea of what it was like to be a killer. I guess he will never finish writing that book he set out to do in the first place. Soon enough me and Alyssa were allowed to go we still had to go to the police station that was schedule for the next day.
“Cant believe we dodge death again James…..its weird this time I feel so numb” Alyssa got into the car I sat in the drivers seat. Felt like old times again “Yes we did, I don’t plan on leaving you again...though I love you do you still love me?” I had to ask I needed to know cause I had to get over Declan. It pains so much that now he will be taken away from me who knows if ill go see him or not. “I love James, I know I have to make for all the time we were apart. Where you going to live?” that was a question I hoped Alyssa might happy given me an idea.
I started up the car and we started to head back down the track onto the main road and drove away “Alyssa I don’t know….I have to go back to that house get my stuff and well...I really don’t want to live in the car” I was feeling like crying again I was homeless again. Alyssa placed a comforting hand on my shoulder she was showing signs of sympathy towards me “I’ll try and see if mother will let you stay with us. You are my boyfriend” she rambled off as I heard the word boyfriend come out of her mouth for the first time.
“Ok” I replied to her and smiled I kept driving along as darkness was soon settling in we managed to get back to Declan’s house. Though we pulled up and notice that someone was there, it was the old woman that must been Declan’s grandmother she saw us pull in and came out the door “Hey who are you? Wait.. you I remember you two. Your the one who killed my son” she started to raise her voice we remained inside the car. “Wheres my grandson!!” the old woman cried as I could tell she clearly not aware of what has happened.
“Declan been arrested for killing Bonnie….he been taken by the police into holding cell until he is found guilty” The old woman looked stunned she didn’t want to believe what I was saying Alyssa and I watched her lose it I really wish we could calm her down. “I’m sorry but I need to get my things from inside and leave” I said flatly as she shot a look at me one which was hostile more so distressed. “Get your things and leave.. I’ll have to make a trip the police station and also tell his mother she going to be distraught. Bad enough he didn’t even go see her at all. She suffering from cancer hence Declan is living alone with his bi polar and doing this stupid book about killers…..” the old woman continued talking as I got out of the car and headed towards the front door she trailed behind me for a bit.
“Again I’m sorry….I’ll be quick” I headed the stairs and entered the room and looked around then grabbed my stuff out of the drawer and left. This was going to be very last time I was going to be in this house his grandmother was still there waiting for me to leave which I did. She locked the door and stopped me for a moment “Were you living here with him?” I just nodded and then she let me go standing there trying to process everything “I was for a short period of time. He had his moments where he cared for me, I know he clearly regretting what he has done. Lets just hope for the least punishment” the woman tried to accept what I was saying as comforting Alyssa didn’t get out of the car she sat and watched us.
It felt wrong to leave this poor woman here by herself but she soon headed on her way and we left the house behind. “I guess we will head back to your place” Alyssa had already been giving me a look she really wanted to kiss me I kind of got the feeling she did. I did a quick kiss which made her smile I missed that smile. “James…..you really should focus on the road” she said sarcastically.
Felt like old times again I was looking forward to Alyssa finally feeling we could start our relationship we been prolonging for so long. Being in the car and see her smiling and fooling around we soon pulled into the drive way of her house to see her mother was standing out there waiting for her daughter to come home. “Alyssa where the hell you been!!” she rushed over and hugged her then saw same me and her face changed and she held Alyssa close to her before she pried herself away and went over to me “James...” I stood there with my bag of my belongings in my hand looking pitiful “Mum James is homeless, and his my boyfriend I want him to live with us” Alyssa giving her mother the puppy dog eyes pleading for her mother to have a change of heart.
“Alright Alyssa….come inside James you might as well tell me what has happened” honestly I didn’t want to specially after our brush with death. Alyssa was reluctant to talk but she decided to not mention anything about Declan or Bonnie at all. “I went for a walk and I saw James driving around, we talked he told me he ended up leaving that guy and decided be best if we were together. I’m just happy to have him back” the words moved me so much I wanted to cry though Alyssa mother seemed to moved too that she started to sob herself.
“I’m sorry that I hadn’t accepted your relationship….I’m just happy Alyssa is alright and everything” Alyssa sighed as her mother sobbed I tried to keep the tears from flowing it was great that there’s been finally a break through here. “I guess we better find somewhere for you to sleep” Alyssa took my hand and we started upstairs I felt love again between us I think she has changed a lot, I feel like I have in a way too. So this is how it ends. As for Declan’s fate there were grey areas though consider circumstances he could end up facing jail time. We kind of kept this away from her mother knowledge as we had to go back and give our testimonies. I couldn’t help but look at Declan I felt Alyssa squeeze my hand tightly and assured things be fine.
His grandmother was present and verdict was reached and sure it wasn’t looking good for him at all. Regardless what his grandmother said about his health condition and how he wouldn’t have any intent of killing another human. It was hard for me to speak on the stand but I could only tell the truth. I told the judge Declan clearly wasn’t in the right state of mind due to his bi polar which effected him. I said Declan was a decent man I didn’t bring up about his random attacks on me or the love we formed for that short period of time. I didn’t want Alyssa to know that detail I just got back with her now.
Declan wanted to explore the mind of a killer and had gone too far he was clearly regretting it. Whilst we were in court, his grandmother received a call from the hospital and excused herself from the court room. “Sorry I need to take this call” she said as the judge called for a break in the hearing. We sat there in silence though wasn’t long until she came back looking very upset. “Your honour I like to let my grandson know that his mother has died. Is it possible we could go to the hospital at least for him to see her one last time” Declan was shattered emotionally the judge decided to allow it and the court session ended.
Declan and his grandmother were escorted out and over to their car by the police we watched them soon leave.
“I feel awful for him…….he lost his mother…..he lost his freedom everything” I walked along with Alyssa who was attached my arm we went over to where we parked the car. I couldn’t help but think about how lucky I was not to end up in jail after that killing of Clive Koch. I realised I withheld information that could had added onto Declan sentence I know that was wrong to withhold the truth I did to try and soften the blow for him.
--------------------------------------------------------------
ALYSSA POV
James and I were feeling Declan’s loss James seemed to be taking it badly I wondered if there was more between him and Declan. I didn’t know whether to ask him about it though we left the court and decided to go somewhere to eat, we hadn’t eaten together in a long time kind if missed that part of our relationship we had. We found a table and sat down we were dressed nicely cause we had to go to court, the suit that James worn most of the last time I saw him was back on him he looked so dapper. I did have a nice dress on compare to ones I worn previously at least it wasn’t the wedding gown.
I did feel hungry and James seemed to be already digging into his meal though he looked over at me. “What?” I said he still seemed down I could tell even a meal together trying to forget what has happened isn’t going to solve the sadness that James was carrying on his shoulders. “I held back on the truth in court….I didn’t want make Declan feel even worse than he did. I feel guilty like I done something wrong” clearly I felt a little surprised that he was confessing to me but he needed to talk I was here to listen.
“James you can tell me….I’m sure whatever to didn’t say wouldn’t be so bad” I waited as he took in a deep breath and a sip from the water he had order. He clasped his hands on the table before his plate of food “I had feelings for Declan we kissed and stuff but there were times were he would have angry outburst and well hurt me…..once I knew that he had bi polar it made sense as to why he acted the way he did. The thing that bothered me the most he tried to keep me from seeing you again” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing though James looked like he was on the verge of crying though he tried to maintain his composure since we were in a public place.
I leaned over and placed my hands on his and looked at him “It’s ok James….I shouldn’t been so shrew, I should have kept giving you affection regardless the fact that you lost the ability to well….” I trailed off that was going to sting him more, I did wonder what be like if James was a father he would been a great father, even though he was knowledge in something that other people wouldn’t be in I found it fascinating. “I guess we kind of even though you had been with two men compare to my one” he seemed to have chuckled a little as I given him a smile “Did you like him that way?” I had to ask and James nodded “I think if the right guy catches my eye like he did, if they aren’t so messed up in the head” James was clearly admitting he liked men.
It didn’t really bother me much as it should have but I did take a playful swipe at him “Hey what was that for” he said I folded my arms across my chest. “I hope you don’t plan on leaving me again. He didn’t like fuck you?” that made James just shake his head like he was somewhat disappointed in missing that “No...he didn’t we shared a bed but we didn’t explore that aspect at all” this was somewhat good news I hate to know if he had sex with Declan before he even did it with me. At the same time Declan could have given him that where as I don’t if would been the same coming from me. “I’m just happy to have you back I’ll make up for everything, at least my mother had come around she clearly was moved by the whole “romance” thing” James resumed to eating his meal again he seemed to cheered up a little I too got back to eating. We talked more and not about what had happened between us it was more of what does the future hold. James was never going to leave me I don’t want him to ever too, if at some point our relationship fizzles out and we ended up finding someone else it be a mutual friendship that will keep us together forever.
The End