Chapter Text
It started with a cool breeze through the treetops. The wind blew orange leaves from the branches and into piles all over the road, which made the path ahead look like a tapestry. The clouds were grey overhead, but the air felt good on the skin…
Ellie took a deep, comfortable breath as a few droplets of water fell into her hair. “It’s raining…”
She looked back over her shoulder and up past the trees to catch a glimpse. As her weight shifted, she clutched a hand forward and held tight to Joel’s coat, holding steady on their horse.
He kept one hand on the reins and held the other out to the side. “Yeah, I feel it, too. Better than snow, at least; weather’s been gettin’ colder,” he hummed thoughtfully. “Sky’s been dark the past few days. Bet you twenty bucks that’s a storm comin’ in tonight.”
Frowning, Ellie nestled back into her position behind him, holding still with her hands on his sides. “How much further do you think we have?”
“Eh… hard to say. Day or two, maybe. You never know with these suburbs; they’re like a damn maze sometimes.”
Things had been quiet since they’d left Jackson. Sure, there were infected here and there, but no hunters or anyone else on the road. The quiet made Ellie a little uneasy, but she couldn’t deny a little peace was nice. And Joel seemed to be in a good mood lately.
It wasn’t much later in the day that a flash of light shot through the clouds, followed a moment after by a distant rumble of thunder.
“You hear that?” Joel perked up, nudging an elbow back at her.
“Yeah.”
“What did I say? Storm’s comin’.”
Ellie scrunched her face. “You think? Rain’s not very bad.”
“Not yet. But I don’t want to be caught out in the open when it starts.” He pursed his lips, looking around at the surrounding homes. “These houses are in pretty good shape. Let’s hole up and take some shelter before it starts comin’ down.”
“Are you sure? It’s so early. There’s still light.”
“So what? What’s your hurry all of a sudden? Fireflies ain’t goin’ anywhere.”
“Well, we don’t know that.” She frowned at the thought and shook her head. “But, no, I’m not in a hurry. I’m just saying, you always wanna push on. ‘Don’t waste daylight’, and all that.”
“Well, I’m also old, and tired. And my shoulders hurt, ‘cause you keep tuggin’ on my coat.”
“I’m not tugging! I’m just…”
“You’re tugging. And you’ve got little sharp claws, too. Don’t you ever cut your nails?”
“Pft. Whatever.”
Joel chuckled to himself as he tugged on the horse’s reins, diverting them off the road and up a driveway toward a towering brick house. As they approached, Joel scooted off the front of the horse and down to his feet, and Ellie took over, sliding up and clutching the reins for herself. He knelt in front of the garage door, testing it, then gave a grunt and tugged it open. He struggled with it, hoisting it up to waist length, then grabbing the handle from the other side and pulling it open the rest of the way. Ellie just watched, puffing air through her lips and blowing around a little strand of hair that dangled in her vision.
With the garage door open, he waved her in, and she tugged the reins to follow, ducking her head as she stepped into the garage.
“Here,” Joel huffed, just a little out of breath. “You tie up Callus in here. I’ll give the place a once over, make sure it’s safe.”
“You got it.”
They nodded to each other, and then Joel clicked on his flashlight and stepped into the house. Ellie slid down onto her feet, kicking her tennis shoes at the dusty stone floor.
Rain was already starting to beat down with some intensity on the driveway outside. Joel was right; she snickered to herself at that.
The wet leaves and grass outside smelled nice outside. She closed her eyes and enjoyed it for a second before remembering what she was supposed to be doing.
Hurrying along with the reins in one hand, she tied off Callus on a metal shelf in the corner of the garage.
“Bet you want to get out of the rain, too, huh, boy?” She pet his mane, and nestled up to her cutely, pushing his neck into her hand. She grinned and gave him a scratch: “There you go, Callus. That’s a good boy. Good boy…!”
The door into the garage opened suddenly, and Ellie jumped with surprise, just the tiniest bit embarrassed.
Joel didn’t seem to notice, though, tucking a thumb into his belt and glancing out the garage at the rain. “Coast looks clear. Nice place, too. You want to claim a bedroom?”
“Ooh! Say no more.”
She hurried inside past him. As she did, he hovered in the garage, taking a moment of his own to pet the horse. Ellie grinned.
It was hardly a tough decision. The bedroom at the end of the hall upstairs had a huge window opposite a queen bed. She tossed her backpack on it and scurried back downstairs.
When she returned, she found Joel standing in the living room right in front of the couch, scratching at his chin. In front of him was a TV – a huge, flat-screen TV, so big its legs was perched across two small tables. Poking out from behind him, Ellie could see both their reflections in it.
“Whatcha doing?” she hummed.
He glanced down at her. “Reminiscing.”
“Reminiscing about TV?”
And his eyes went back up to the screen. “Yeah…”
With a groan, he lowered himself down onto the couch. As soon as he touched the cushions, every muscle in his body seemed to relax, and he melted into it, hands folding on his lap and eyes closed.
Ellie perched on the arm at the opposite end. “What’d you like to watch?”
He didn’t have to think about it for even a second. “Football,” he said wistfully.
“Football, huh…?”
“Oh, yeah…”
Curious, Ellie watched him, and her gaze drifted back to the TV herself. What would she like to watch? She barely had any idea of what TV actually was; it seemed weird to stare at a box all day.
“Did…” She hesitated to ask, but her curiosity spurred her on anyway. “Did you and Sarah watch football together?”
Joel gave the instinctual flinch she knew he would, and his eyes opened – but with a moment’s thought, he softened it to a roll of his eyes, looking in the other direction. “Ellie…”
“Sorry, sorry. I just…”
“No… it’s fine.” He cleared his throat. “Uh, but, no. Had to twist her arm to get her to watch sports, honestly.”
“Didn’t she play soccer?”
Ellie cursed herself as soon as she said it, and Joel caught it, too, shooting her a suspicious look.
“Yeah… she did. Did I tell you that?”
“No.” Ellie brushed it off, kicking her feet under her. “Uh. Tommy did, back at the power plant. He told me a couple things.”
“Mm.” Joel thought about that for a moment, scratching at his beard. But he dropped it. “Well, yeah, she did play soccer. She was damn good at it, too. But, nah, watching football – that was more somethin’ I did with Tommy.”
Ellie grinned with genuine excitement, enjoying the idea of it. “Yeah? You and Tommy would hang out and watch the game?”
“When we could. Back in Texas, there was this family, the Hendersons. Had this sweet little girl… Julie. When Sarah was little, she and Julie would do playdates, usually every other weekend. Go to each other’s houses. So every other Sunday, Tommy’d come over, we’d crack open a couple of beers, watch the game, maybe put the grill on. Sarah’d be back for dinner, and the three of us would eat outside, if the weather was nice.”
“Sounds fun.”
“Yeah. I’ll tell you what, after you have kids, just having a chance to sit back and relax once in a while, it’s…” He sank lower in the couch.
He really could use the rest, couldn’t he? Ellie pinched her fingers together, wondering if her nails really were too sharp.
“Once we’re done here,” she chirped, “maybe they watch football back in Jackson. Tommy said they have projectors for movies and stuff.”
Joel gave a chuckle. “Maybe. It’s not really the same when it’s not live, though.”
“Well. Maybe they play football, too.”
He seemed about to write it off, but hesitated, cracking a handsome little smile. “That would be nice, wouldn’t it? I could take you to a game.”
“I’d like that.” She shrugged. “I don’t know the first thing about it, though. You’d have to teach me how it works.”
“Oh, I could teach you. Any time you like. Trust me, I could talk about football all day long.”
“Ha. Okay, deal…”
They fell back into their comfortable silence. Ellie hugged her knee, letting her foot dangle off the side of the couch. And she watched him, appreciative. Maybe she should…
She craned her neck to look at him. “…Hey, Joel…?”
“Mm?”
His eyes darted over to look at her. He seemed at peace like this. Nerves prickled down the back of Ellie’s neck.
Her eyes fluttered. “…Nothing. Never mind.”
“You sure?” He frowned for just a moment, but didn’t read into it. “Alright, then…”
She looked out the window. Rain was starting to beat down on the glass, fogging it up around the sides.
“I’m gonna go out and pee,” she said softly.
“Alright. Be careful.”
“I know.”
Ellie dropped back to the floor and scurried upstairs, grabbing her backpack off the bed. She slung it over her shoulder on the way outside, catching a glimpse from Joel as she stepped out into the rain.
With a little wince, she held a hand over her head to block the weather, hurrying into the grass around the side of the house. She found a little porch around back, with a ceiling that extended just far enough to keep you dry when you took the garbage out. Ellie took a seat on the porch there, sitting on the damp ground with her legs crossed. She gritted her teeth, sliding her backpack off and settling it on her lap.
She dug one hand into it, feeling around for a little piece of paper. Then she pulled it out and studied it, clutching it in both hands. That photo of Joel and Sarah. She felt guilty carrying it around. But…
With a sigh, her eyes flitted up to the back porch. Another light shot through the clouds above, and another roar of thunder rumbled down below. The rain beat down into the tall grass, splashing off the ends and wetting the tips of her tennis shoes.
She closed her eyes. At least it broke up the quiet. And she loved the smell.
Her eyes fluttered open in the dark. Her face pressed to the cold stone floor, and as she peeled herself from the ground, she felt debris sticking to the sweat on her cheek. She rubbed it off with the back of her hand, scowling.
“…Ow.”
Head throbbing, she propped her elbows up on the ground. Blood trickled down over the corner of her eyes. Still alive… definitely still alive.
She heaved herself forward, clawing one hand in front of the other, feeling around in front of her. It was pitch black down here, and that constant groaning from the heart of the building was louder than ever now. Close.
Her eyes fluttered as she looked up. But there was nothing to see; she was surrounded by darkness.
So, she listened.
There were infected everywhere. Clamoring through the walls, clustering together, searching the empty space in the same routine they’d followed for however long they’d been in here.
But there was an empty space in front of her. Some kind of gap. She crawled toward it.
Every movement put a jolt of pain through a different part of her body. Nothing was broken, she didn’t think, and only some of her was bleeding. But she was sore. Sore, and aching, and utterly exhausted.
She planted a hand on the ground and tried to lift herself up. Pain shot through her arm, and she noticed blood trickling down from her sleeve and into her palm. Still, she pushed through, and her knees came up to the ground, and finally she knelt on them. One more breath, and she pushed her hands on her knees, and she stood.
One foot, then the other. She trudged through the dark until her hand found a wall, soft and overgrown with fungus. Digging her fingers into the flesh, she leaned against it and peered around the corner, squinting.
Finally, something penetrated the darkness – a ray of light shining under some kind of obstruction. She pushed herself from the wall and trudged over to it, sinking onto one knee to reach for it. A chunk of concrete had buried it. She gripped one hand over it and shoved it aside, and there she found her flashlight, mercifully still in one piece, and still on. With no backpack to affix it to, she simply held it, shining it in a circle around her.
The bottom level of the complex was exactly as she’d expected: a grey, dusty, overgrown pile of rubble. A pit at the bottom of that chasm that swallowed up the lab that used to be here. Shining the light upwards, she saw a ledge above, at the edge of the floor where the story above her had collapsed. Higher than that, there was another ledge, then another. Some kind of tremendous weight had sunk through every single floor of the building somewhere in the center. That was where the fungus had started growing, she figured.
The beam of light caught a glint of something on the level above. Ellie walked toward it curiously, eyes narrowed. She approached until she was right under it, then she realized: it was her backpack, or a shred of it, at least. One of its handles had caught on something and ripped it in half. Now the back cover of it dangled in the air, hanging off a piece of rebar like a fruit dangling from a tree branch. That rebar was caught on a massive pile of concrete and steel beams, all piled on top of each other on the floor above and causing the ceiling to cave in downward. That little bit of rebar poked out as if its sole purpose was for Ellie to have hit it on her way down.
She puffed air through her lips and turned away. Her light shone over the floor – it was a nearly impossible-to-search dusting of debris and fungal growths all over the ground. But there were a few little bits of something that must have fallen from her backpack. She walked to the nearest one and knelt to take it.
Her pistol, the one missing from the holster on her leg. She turned it over in her hand – busted. The slide had notched forward and bent, and now it wouldn’t retract. She threw it away with a scoff, then cast her light across the rest of the room.
She took one step forward, then froze, holding her flashlight as still as the rest of her.
Something had moved out into the open from around that corner. It didn’t make a sound, not until she knew to listen for it.
A burly, lumbering figure. Another bloater, just as massive as the one she and Abby had fought on the top floor. It stood in place, facing some other direction, then dragged its feet and took a step.
Thunk.
It lurched, then croaked in Ellie’s direction.
She held still. It didn’t react.
Thunk.
Another step. It craned its neck. Its arms hung off its body and swung like battering rams.
It croaked again. Its head cocked in her direction, and it took one more step. Then it stood there, silent, assessing what it had just sensed.
“Yeah… okay.” Ellie put a hand behind her neck and held it, cracking it to one side. She rolled one shoulder, then the other. She brushed that hand through her hair, cool and short. And then, finally, she looked forward and set her eyes on it.
One hand held the light up to the new obstacle in front of her. The other crept back into her jeans, fingers curling over her knife. She drew it and held it at her side, letting the blade unsheathe with a polished sheen.
Blood ran down her face. It hurt to walk, and every muscle in her body ached with the weight of a five-thousand-mile journey.
No weapons left but that old switchblade and her bloody fists.
One last thing.
“Okay, motherfucker.”
She hissed it with more confidence than she had.
The bloater hunched slightly, clocking her, shuffling ever-so slightly forward. It paused, facing her dead-on as if to stare her down. It shook its head furiously. Then it charged, stampeding across the room in Ellie’s direction.
She moved as fast as she could:
“Hrrragh!”
It swung mid-charge, and Ellie ducked without a moment to spare, feeling the air blow her hair back. Slipping past it, she carried her right hand to the side and carved a thin line with her knife – barely enough to cut a fleck of fungus from its body.
The momentum carried her a few feet from it, where she skidded to a stop and turned. The bloater slammed into the wall, going too fast to stop itself, and Ellie flashed her light upward as the crash brought trails of dust down from the ceiling.
It was stronger than it could even control. The infected were always like that, of course. The progression of the infection was just the fungus outgrowing their bodies.
Ellie took a sharp breath, steadying herself again. The bloater stumbled from the wall and bellowed, then stepped toward her erratically.
Another swing. She ducked under it again, clutching her switchblade in both hands, awkwardly trying to hold onto her flashlight at the same time. With as much force as she could muster, she dropped and drove the knife into the bloater’s armored knee, barely penetrating it. As it swung its arms around and searched for her, she planted a sneaker on its leg and pried her knife out, stumbling onto her backside as she shuffled away.
It found her again, groaning with some kind of alien displeasure. Both its arms raised over its head, and it lowered itself to slam its fists into the ground, clawing around with meaty hands for her body. Getting her distance, Ellie grunted and hurried to her feet again, backing up against the far wall.
It was a little dance. All she had to do was circle around it. She just had to watch where it was going…
And so, again, it charged, hammering into the opposite wall, bellowing in frustration. It tore a chunk of its own body off and hurled it across the room, flooding Ellie’s ray of light with burning, acidic spores. Ellie staggered out of the way, the burning rippling over her arms and face. In the brief moment of confusion, the bloater closed the distance again, and Ellie, dazed, slid back.
It’s swinging arm clipped her this time. Only barely, but still enough to floor her. The strike to her side left her numb, but she overpowered it with adrenaline, clawing herself to her feet again. The bloater again crashed into the wall, and again, specks of dust and debris rattled loose from the ceiling.
Ellie eyed the level above. She hunched, knife twirling in her hand, teeth gritted tight enough to hurt. It turned toward her, and she pounced, diving beneath it and driving her knife down into the exact same spot on its leg, striking again with pinpoint accuracy. She got a little deeper, carving a little closer to its body through the thick layer of fungus. Then she pried it loose, keeping herself close to the wall, careful not to lose it in her sight.
It roared this time, frustrated with the back and forth. It turned and barreled toward her along the wall, a little slower, favoring one leg over the other. Ellie dove past, guiding it out into the open, leaping to the floor and rolling onto her back. It skidded to a stop, turned on its heel, then charged in a straight line at her one last time.
“Come on… come on, you piece of shit, come on…”
Thunkthunkthunkthunkthunk–
It barreled into the wall a third time, so hard it dented the concrete. Big chunks of stone and drywall clattered to the ground from the ceiling, and the noise confused the bloater, its face darting around in a few directions.
Ellie whistled, and it focused up again. She stood twenty feet from the wall, right under the ledge, watching it strain under the weight of the rubble piled up above.
The bloater groaned, swinging an arm mindlessly. It stomped a foot and charged one last time.
That was her moment. Ellie dropped, plunging the knife into that same wounded spot on its leg. Finally, she got it deep, hitting something soft, and it gave a single shriek.
Its posture wavered, and it fell to a knee. Ellie ripped the knife out and tossed it behind her, letting it fly across the room and wait for her on the floor. Then she sucked in her breath and went for it:
A hand clutched to its shoulder, and another to its head. From behind, she scaled it like a monkey, planting her feet on its shoulders and hoisting herself those extra feet from the ground. She shone her light right above her, judging the distance, taking her best guess –
At the last second, she tossed the flashlight, too, freeing both her hands. She leapt with as much strength as she could muster, hands raised above her, and at the peak of her jump, she caught something cold and rusty. Hanging from the ledge, she found that loose piece of rebar that her backpack hung from, keeping one hand on it while the other stabilized her on the ledge. Her feet dangled dangerously around the bloater’s face, scraping it with the toes of her sneakers. She gripped the rebar and tugged, shoving at the ledge with her other hand. Her feet rocked back and forth, and it loosened inch, by inch, by inch…
…Ellie shut her eyes, praying…
And then tore the rebar out from under its pile, kicking herself back down off the ledge in the process. Still gripping the metal in her hand, she hit the ground on her back with a hard, painful thud. Without the energy to do more, she laid on her back and clawed at the ground for her flashlight, then pointed it across the room between her legs.
The bloater turned to face her, roared, and then was summarily crushed under five tons of debris. The dipping ceiling finally broke under the weight, and funneling to its lowest point, poured out stone and steel from the tear in the floor, hammering the infected with an earsplitting crash that echoed through the building’s every open floor.
Blown back by a cloud of dust, Ellie rolled over her back three times before curling up, doing her best to cover her eyes with her arm.
She held herself still, eyes closed, quivering in the darkness…
The echo of the crash faded, and everything quieted. The dark was still…
Slowly, she opened her eyes, turned over, and sat up. She held the flashlight up and cast it over the still pile of rubble where the bloater used to be. Not a trace of it could still be seen underneath the mess.
Her eyes closed again, and she fell back to the floor, chest heaving. Her exhaustion caught up with her, and for a while, she just lay there, heart pounding.
It didn’t take long for the cold floor to wear out its novelty. With a grunt, she sat up again, legs crossed. Her light shone across the floor. Somewhere in the protruding veins of fungus bulging out of the concrete, she found the glint of her knife, which she tucked away again.
“Gotta stop losing shit,” she muttered.
Next to it was the shard of old rebar she’d pried out from the rubble. That last scrap of her ruined backpack still hung to it from one strap. Curious, she tore it free and held it in one hand.
Everything she’d been carrying was now somewhere in the dark, broken or lost. Her weapons, and her journal. But brushing the dust off the fabric in her hand, miraculously, she found the rocket ship pin, still glinting off the light of her flashlight.
With a shrug, she pinned it to her chest.
Finally, she got to her feet again. She shone the light across the room, now even dustier and harder to make sense of than before. With a little searching, she rounded that first corner she’d stumbled into, then peered down the corridor where the bloater had approached.
At one point, there were doors and offices all over the place, it seemed. Now, every exit seemed to be caved in or overgrown at every possible entrance. The relentless clicking and bellowing through the walls seemed to be the desperation of infected that would spend the rest of their lives in a tomb. Ellie frowned, wondering exactly how long that would be.
Exploring the hall, Ellie’s light caught one set of green steel doors, still intact. She pried one open and shone her light down the hall, taking one step after another as slowly and carefully as she could. And there, finally, at the bottom of one last dark staircase, did she find another light, barely escaping another room just out of view.
Her heart nearly stopped with relief. As the adrenaline finally flushed from her, she leaned her head against the wall, letting out an audible groan. She hadn’t really doubted she’d find him… did she?
She stepped from the wall, approaching the stairs. That’s when she noticed the old, faded sign posted to one side of them:
Mortuary
The second light led her to a little room nestled into the lab’s very lowest level. What used to be a glass door was now a collapsed mound of stone, with only a little opening remaining where the rubble had caught on the bent steel door frame.
Ellie got down on her knees and crawled through, following the second light. On the other end of a tunnel, she found the ceiling opened just a little higher. But this room was a dead end. A little cave hidden away at the end of this death trap.
There wasn’t much remaining of the morgue. Half of the room was totally caved in, and the angled ceiling left so little room to walk that Ellie had to duck her head. And it was fully lit: half a dozen mortuary cabinets, all open and empty, a desk that reached a foot below the ceiling, still cluttered with papers.
And Lev, sitting at the base of the desk with his mask off, flashlight rolling between his hands. He saw Ellie’s light as soon as she crept in, and his head rolled to the side, eyes fluttering thoughtlessly at her. He was as haggard as she was. Maybe more. His shaggy hair hung in his eyes.
“Lev,” she breathed. “Your mask…”
“It’s okay,” he replied quietly. He gestured across the floor to a spot near her feet, where an intact gas mask sat atop Lev’s backpack. Her eyes darted back to his, and he waved a hand. “The spores didn’t make it in here. See?” He took a breath for emphasis.
Ellie took a breath of her own. It was true; that musty smell in the back of her sinuses hadn’t quite penetrated this deep. The cave-in caused a little blockade this deep in the structure, apparently. It was a little bit of serendipity, an eye in the storm, untouched by the infection that had claimed everything else.
Frowning, she walked over toward the desk, slightly hunched. Lev didn’t look at her, shining his flashlight around the room and blankly looking into the mortuary cabinets.
She stopped at the desk. All the papers had been rifled through. One tape player sat on top of them, clearly turned over and already listened-to.
Hesitantly, Ellie grabbed it and hit rewind, then play, still watching Lev’s face. He twitched with displeasure at the sound of Dr. Wise’s voice crackling to life one last time:
“This is Rachel.”
The doctor let out a long, grieving, miserable sigh, her breathing cutting out slightly in the recording.
“I killed my husband today.
He was… he was helping collect samples. It was a live one, a stage three. Not that we needed any more samples of stage three, but…
It was him, and – and two lab associates, and a teenager. A seventeen-year-old. The fucking… restraints broke… and it bit them all before they put it down.
Our procedure is to… handle accidents like that pragmatically. It’s a tragedy… but it’s a useful opportunity for research.
We always need more happy accidents like that.
Well… fuck the procedure. He didn’t want to turn. He begged me to kill him. So, I did. The others… the others, they’re studying. Now, Nathan wants the research board to review my conduct. Like, they’re going to censure me. For honoring my husband’s wishes.
I don’t…
I don’t know if I…
It’s not human. It’s not human, what we’re doing here.
We’re always close to something, aren’t we? We’re always so close, and yet so far.
And we’re not done scaling up. We just need a few more fucking accidents. Then we’ll have a cure.
Well… if you’re listening to this, you know I’m gone. I have my limits. I’m so fucking exhausted.
…I’m so fucking exhausted.
In the old days, I had another lab. That all fell apart, too. But there were a couple researchers there that… well, I never learned for sure what happened to them.
It’s not much. But I don’t know what else we can do but to start from scratch.
If you’re exhausted, too… then, when this whole thing blows up in your face, maybe you can come find me.
Take the highway west, and don’t stop until –”
Ellie stopped the tape. Her finger twitched over the button without even really thinking. She set it back down on the table.
Lev hadn’t so much as looked at her for the whole thing. She studied his face. He had a couple little, fainter scars she’d never noticed before. Overshadowed by the ones he’d made on purpose, maybe.
He leaned back against the table, sucked in his breath, then let it out in a whimper. “It’s, uh… Calgary. That’s what she says on the tape. So… yeah. Due west.”
Ellie didn’t say anything. She thought about it for a long time, then sighed, lowering herself down to the floor until she could sit at the foot of the table, right at his side. Her legs stretched out in front of her, long and thin, bruised, pale skin poking out through holes in her jeans.
She set her flashlight down beside her, and it rolled over and rested against the leg of the table, keeping the whole room bright.
“…Are you okay, Lev?” she finally asked. Her voice cracked a little as she spoke.
She tilted her head to the side. He looked back at her with wide eyes and a broad frown. He offered the faintest little nod, lips pursed thin.
“Are you…?” he started, hesitating. “Are you mad at me for running away?”
“No. I’m not mad.”
He squinted like he didn’t really believe her. Then he looked away again, picking at his fingernails.
“I’m sorry. I know it wasn’t smart. But I just… panicked.”
“I get it.”
“Yeah. I know.” He clicked his tongue. “Abby will be mad.”
“Yeah.”
“Things have been so hard for her. I don’t want to make her worry.”
“Of course not.”
Lev sighed guiltily, hugging his arms closer to him.
“Do you… do you remember the story I told about my island? When I was younger.” He looked to her for confirmation, and she frowned, trying to recall. He explained: “We had a secret place. A waterfall.”
That did stick in her memory. She nodded faintly. “Like somewhere humans had never touched before.”
“Right,” he replied with a nod. “Our… prophet. She’s supposed to guide our path. Through hardship, she teaches us. That’s… what Seraphites believe.”
He seemed like even he wasn’t sure where he was going with this. He fidgeted with his flashlight, shining it back over the walls of the mortuary. Ellie wasn’t sure how to respond, but she listened patiently, her expression soft.
Eventually, Lev worked around to it. “She taught us… that the old world died because of their sin. By following her, we were… making something better. The new world will be better. That’s what she taught us.” He affirmed it to himself with a nod, though he didn’t seem reassured by the thought. Then, a bit more darkly, he let his mind go somewhere else. “Why… do you think Priya left?”
Ellie sighed, surprised by the shift in his tone. Still, she had an answer. “She left because she didn’t feel like she could trust us.” She shook her head. “Me… she felt like she couldn’t trust me.”
Without missing a beat, Lev scoffed, uncharacteristically harsh. “Well, that’s stupid.”
Ellie’s eyes went wide. “We kept a lot from her. Maybe she was right.”
“She wasn’t. It’s stupid. It’s not like you and Ben were lying about being immune. She could see that.”
“You’re right. But…” As though Ellie hadn’t already thought through all this herself: “…Lev, I know it’s hard to think about, but the truth is, Priya was right. If we’d been honest with the group about what happened with me and Abby, we never would have taken the risks we did. Ben died because of the choices I made.”
Trying to soften it, she reached out and touched Lev on the arm. She watched his face…
…He just blinked, finding her expression with an eerie coldness:
“So what?”
Her hand pulled back. “Lev…”
“What?” He whipped his hands out in front of him for emphasis. “I don’t understand. People die. People die all the time. You kill people, I kill people. Priya killed people. I don’t understand why Ben dying changes anything. If she was willing to leave because of that… I don’t think she ever really cared about this in the first place. If she really cared, she would be here right now.”
“I… I don’t think that’s true.”
“Whatever.” Clearly not getting through to her, he slumped back against the table leg again. “What I’m trying to say is, people keep making excuses. Everyone says they care, but they don’t act like it. Even Abby… if it wasn’t for me, she would have quit, too. Nobody sees it the way I do, except for you.”
What could Ellie say to that? She offered a small nod, hanging on his every word.
Their eyes met, and then he nodded again, the thought he’d been searching for finally coming to him. “True strength.”
“What?”
“True strength,” he repeated with some annoyance. “This is how She guides us. When you’re at your lowest, you’re at your strongest. When you’re suffering, you’re learning better how to adapt. When people around you die, you learn better how to live. It’s easy to give up. Because nobody wants to endure the suffering. But when you’ve been through it… when you’ve been through it as much as we have, if you give up, then… no matter how much you wish you could…”
He waved his hand, like he couldn’t quite find the words.
And Ellie felt something cold. Something that crept up her back and stayed there, like a hand on her shoulder. Her skin ached.
“…It can’t be for nothing,” she added, breathless.
His eyes opened wide with relief. Finally, finally, someone understood. “Exactly.”
That look he gave her…
The cold feeling lingered on her, her eyes wide and uncertain. It was always the same hopeless look.
When she spoke again, it was cautious and slow. “Back at the Firefly base. Do you remember? You asked me about the girl in the theater. The one that was pregnant.” He nodded, of course, and she tilted her head in answer. “Well, when we made that stop in Jackson, I saw her. Dina – that’s her name. And her son is named JJ. He can walk and talk now. He’s… he’s happy.”
Expressionless, Lev nodded. “…You love them, don’t you?”
“Yes. I do.” She hummed, cupping her hand over her wrist on the right side. “This bracelet I wear? She gave it to me, actually. It’s for good luck.”
“Oh. I don’t think it works.”
Ellie gave a little laugh, though Lev didn’t seem to think it was funny.
“Are they your family?” he asked.
“Yes.”
“Mm.” His eyes half-lidded, thinking back. “That night… in the theater. When I shot her. That… was the night my sister died. I had run off by myself… back to my island. I went to see my mother. My mother… I thought I could talk her into…”
Something stopped him from going on. Ellie frowned at the sight – she could only imagine. She touched a hand to his shoulder, and he stiffened, shaking his head.
“The wolves burned my whole village to the ground that night,” he said quietly. “I’m glad that your family is safe. But, it just… sometimes, it feels like everything ends in fire.”
He wasn’t looking at her anymore, but there was something behind his eyes. He seemed hollow, somehow.
Without thinking, Ellie lowered herself, getting closer to eye level with him. “When I was a kid, growing up in Boston, I wasn’t so different from you, y’know? All I knew was FEDRA. You know, the old guard. All I really knew about the Fireflies is that they were always bombing stuff, and FEDRA was always killing them. I went to a military school. They wanted me to be a soldier.” She clutched at her hand uncomfortably. “Joel is the one that took me away from the city after I got bitten. I saw all the worst stuff in the world. But at the end of it… he took me to Jackson. That’s where I met Dina. Jackson is… I mean, I didn’t even know who I really was until I started a life there. I didn’t know what living was. It was… peace. You know? Real peace.”
“It’s nice.”
“No.” Ellie spoke firmly, making sure he took her meaning. “It’s more than that. What did your prophet say, Lev? It’s the new world.” She stopped, realizing exactly what it was she was saying. “Maybe we’ve just been looking in the wrong place. I used to learn about the old world, and it was like magic. Like all those buildings and books and stuff had just been there forever. But once you start to live without looking over your shoulder… that’s when you get it. How things used to be. How people used to live the way they did. How they put a man on the moon. Do you know what I mean?”
To Ellie’s surprise, Lev seemed a little offended. He scrunched his nose, and suddenly he spoke with a twinge of insecurity: “Stop doing that.”
Genuinely perplexed, she cocked her head back. “Stop doing what?”
“I’m sixteen,” he said with a harsh roll of his eyes. “I know I don’t know a lot about the old world. But I’m not a baby. And you don’t have to tell me magic stories to make me feel better.”
“Lev, what are you talking about?” She blinked – then it clicked. “That they put men on the moon? I didn’t make that up!”
“On the moon? In the sky?” He made a face at her, incredulous.
Again, they stared past each other. “…Wow. Yeah. I…” Ellie stopped, collecting herself, understanding well the sincerity from the accusing look he gave her. “…Sorry. Yes. That really happened.” She paused. She’d never had to explain something like this before – something she so often took for granted… “They used to… um. There were these vehicles called rockets that they would power with superheated rocket fuel. They were these cone-shaped metal cylinders that would come apart in pieces, and in the top piece – the command module – they would send live crew to conduct space missions. In 1969, three men named Buzz Aldrin, Neil Armstrong, and Michael Collins flew to the moon on a spaceflight called Apollo 11. It took nine days, and they orbited the moon and collected samples, and, yeah, they landed on the moon. On a basalt plain called Mare Tranquillitatis, in Lunar Lander Eagle. That’s why the place they landed is called Tranquility Base. They planted a flag. They left footprints there.”
“Footprints…?” Lev repeated with some confusion.
“Yeah.” She shook her head, processing. “Yeah. Right now, as we speak, there are human footprints on the moon.”
“That’s…” He was almost speechless. “That’s amazing…”
“It’s the most amazing fucking thing in the entire world.”
Of course it was.
The look on Lev’s face made her heart flutter. He had a sense of awe she could scarcely remember. There was so much out there he still had never seen.
Ellie had distracted herself with the thought. Of course…!
She’d already reached a hand to her shirt, threading out the pin she’d taken from her backpack. She held it out to him, thumbing over the shape, letting him admire it. “See? It’s a rocket ship.”
Eyes wide, he slid forward on his knees, taking her hand in both of his. He eyed the pin, which he’d surely seen before, but he had never understood: “Cool…!”
“Yeah.”
She took a deep breath, letting the cold feeling pass.
Then she handed it over.
“One day,” said Ellie.
Lev looked her in the eye as he took it. “One day…”
He settled back into a cross-legged position. She relaxed the same way across from him, hands folding in her lap.
Somewhere upstairs, Abby was still searching for the two of them. The urgency of that only just occurred to her, and even then, it felt distant, somehow.
She thought about the promise she’d made. One last thing.
She felt lighter, somehow.
“I think we’re done, Lev,” she said plainly.
Confused, Lev looked up from the pin, sure he misheard. “What?”
Ellie wasn’t so sure of it, either. She looked at him, more focused. Now that she’d said it once…
“…We’re done, Lev. It’s time to go home.”
He froze. The confusion melted, as though the meaning of their whole conversation took just one more moment to catch up with him. And as it did, his shoulders sank.
“I don’t have a home to go back to,” he replied.
“You have Abby.”
“That’s not…”
“It is.” Ellie leaned closer, looking him in the eye, making herself clear. “It is.”
He wavered. Maybe it was.
Ellie saw him hesitate. But she didn’t have to hold herself back from it this time. “I’m done,” she emphasized. “Okay?”
Lev stared at her yearningly, feeling lost.
That was okay. He’d figure it out.
His eyes went back to the pin in his hands. “…Okay.”
“Here, give me a hand with this.”
At her instruction, Lev hurried up to Ellie’s side to grip the side of an overturned vending machine. Together, they put their weight behind it and pushed it up against the wall, just beneath the ledge that led up to the next floor.
They’d already climbed four floors this way, quietly and carefully, fighting a handful of infected along the way.
Ellie went first, then reached down to help Lev. He didn’t need the help, scurrying up with a disorienting agility and hurrying on to the next ledge up.
She hurried behind him, one hand above her head. Further up, one level above, she could finally see daylight where it broke in through the cracks in the fungus growing along the windows. They were surely close to the exit now.
“Here,” Lev said in a hushed tone, returning to Ellie’s side to point up the side of the wall. The ceiling slumped in one place, creating a small ridge that could make a solid handhold. Lev took a confident posture and tugged at the strap of his gas mask, making sure it was secure. “Boost me up.”
Ellie eyed it up, then nodded to him. “Alright. Find me something to climb up on and push it over the ledge. Be careful.”
“I know.”
She knelt at the bottom of the wall, and, eager, Lev stepped into her hands. She gave him a hoist, and with her help, he scurried up to the next level, shining his light down the corridor above. Ellie could only just barely see him as he hurried off –
Then a screech. A clicker burst from the wall somewhere out of view, and then two more. Lev cried out and hurried back, gun at the ready. He fired on them while he could, but he quickly found himself backed up against the ledge, where he stumbled, only just keeping his footing.
Ellie rushed into action, searching the floor below for a way to climb up. Finding nothing, she hissed a curse, drawing the gun Lev had given her from her waistband and sidling back as far as she could, looking for an angle…
“Lev!”
Gunshots rang out up above before Ellie could line up a shot. She edged back, watching as Lev’s posture relaxed, his shoulders slumping. The clickers dropped one by one – the third charged back down the hall just as Abby’s lumbering frame appeared, grabbing it by the shoulders and hurling it all the way back down into the pit.
From that brief glance downward, she spotted Ellie, eyes frantic. But she didn’t give that even a second of thought.
Hurrying over to the edge, Abby fell to one knee and threw her hands onto Lev’s shoulders, rattling him back and forth as she felt around his neck and collarbone.
“Are you okay?” she hissed, on the verge of hyperventilating. “Oh, fuck, Lev, did it bite you?”
“I’m fine!” Flustered, he threw up his hands, raising them to Abby’s wrists and clutching her gently. “I’m fine… it didn’t bite me. Nothing bit me.”
“Oh, my god…!”
At eye level with him, Abby tensed, looking him in the eye through their masks. Then, suddenly overcome, she cried out and threw her arms around him, yanking him off his feet into a vicious hug. His skinny arms wriggled around from under her biceps to curl around her back, and the two embraced. Under her mask, Abby sobbed with relief, all her fear about him catching up to her at once. Lev was embarrassed, but the sudden show of care made him soften, too, guilt washing over him as he realized exactly what he’d put her through.
Finally, Abby broke the hug, and her hands cupped over his face, checking him to make sure he was really there. She broke into frantic, relieved laughter – and Lev followed suit, giggling and touching a hand to her arm, flustered by her affection. It was like they’d forgotten Ellie was even there – like they’d forgotten there was anything else in the whole world.
A story below, Ellie let her shoulders slack. She watched them from her perch below, admiring the little trickle of sun as it slipped through the space between their faces.
She didn’t even realize it until she’d touched her own face, wiping away the blood and sweat and grime.
Ellie was smiling.