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‘’Don’t disappoint me,’’ says Tony. His tone is lighthearted, he’s smiling and half-joking, but Loki’s face falls.
A disappointment.
Your birthright was to die.
You being here with us was a mistake.
Never a true Aesir.
An imposter.
A monster.
A walking evil.
Good for nothing.
Once a disappointment, always a disappointment.
These all were the words only, but hurt more than any wound, any kick, any beating. Sif and Warriors Three were mocking him mercilessly behind his back for the better part of his long life and Thor was too blind to see it. They would have listened to him. They tolerated Loki only because of his brother and the younger’s prince royal blood.
An outsider.
Even before truth about his heritage came to light.
At least now he knows why his whole life he felt like he didn’t belong.
His father, no, not father, Odin, telling him repeatedly how much of the disappointment he was.
Why can’t be like your brother?
I’m sorry, he wanted to tell every time. I’m not him, I’m not like him. I’m Loki.
His name has become the synonym for disappointment.
He’s unworthy. Unworthy of happiness, of Tony’s love.
‘’Lokes, Bambi, you’re with me?’’
Somebody waves a hand in front of Trickster’s face. He blinks in surprise.
‘’Yes, Tony,’’ he answers weakly.
‘’What’s going on?’’ Inquires concern human. ‘’We were having a good time and you just…’’
It makes God of Mischief feel even more guilty than before. He ruined Tony’s fun. Not good.
‘’I’m sorry,’’ he says quietly. ‘’I’m sorry.’’
The confusion on billionaire’s face is evident.
‘’For what?’’
‘’You’ve told me not to disappoint you. I’m sorry, I keep disappointing everybody.’’
The mortal sighs, making Loki tense.
‘’Sweetheart, now I’m sorry. You know I was just kidding, right?’’
‘’They weren’t,’’ whispers the alien, blinking a few times to stop traitorous tears form welling up in his eyes.
‘’I swear, one day I’ll burn Asgard to the ground,’’ mutter Tony furiously, guessing correctly about whom Loki is speaking. ‘’How could they have hurt such a beautiful being like you? The fault is theirs. Loki, you’re not the disappointment. You’re perfect and they are bunch of barbarians.’’
Trickster doesn’t seem convinced.
‘’I did evil things,’’ he says solemnly.
‘’Lokes, we’ve discussed it a countless number of times. I did evil things too. Merchant of Death, hello?’’
A faint smile appears on god’s face.
‘’Screw people talking,’’ comforts him Tony. ‘’You’re not the disappointment. You’re the most wonderful being in the universe and I don’t deserve you.’’
‘’You’re the hero,’’ notices Loki, biting his lower lip.
‘’And you’re wonderful the way you are, magic and books. I love you, Mischief,’’ says the human affectionately. There’s so much love in his eyes that Loki replies automatically, but no less truly.
‘’Love you too, mortal. My mortal.’’