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Levi tossed and turned in his sleeping pack, cursing to himself whenever his face poked out from underneath it and he saw his breath forming clouds in the air. It was chilly — fucking cold as a snowman’s dick, actually — and they were on an expedition that had been planned for the first of spring. It was the first of spring, Levi knew, but apparently winter had decided it had one last surprise for them after two weeks of increasingly warm days.
It was unfortunate as all hell, particularly because they were having to spend the night outside the walls and the chosen place was an old, dilapidated farmhouse. It couldn’t offer real shelter for anyone and Levi, who was actually tired and needed at least some rest, was freezing his ass off and couldn’t fall asleep. He hadn’t been prepared for this, he thought — no one was, because they hadn’t packed for a highly unexpected burst of cold weather. They hadn’t brought their heavy coats and they certainly hadn’t brought any extra blankets, and once everyone had settled down for the night, everything had gotten quiet and the fires they’d started had gradually burned out.
Still, he seemed to be the only one having a problem. His squad was completely unconscious around him, and he could hear Mike snoring loudly while Hange mumbled in their sleep 3 or 4 yards away. He hadn’t heard anyone stir in what must have been an entire hour either, but then again, perhaps no else hated the cold like he did. Perhaps no one else had terrible memories associated with it nor had spent their childhood growing up in a place like the Underground, as it certainly had not been the warmest place to live. He’d always disliked the cold, damp air down there and how easily it had been for it to enter his body and chill him to the bone, but it was stupid, because shouldn’t he be used to dealing with it either way?
Shouldn’t he be used to how shivering sometimes reminded him of a long ago feeling of extreme helplessness, and of a memory seen through the eyes of a fucking kid, curled up against the wall while dirty and freezing and starving, as well as completely and utterly alone except for the corpse of his mother? He recalled his teeth chattering so violently that he’d become afraid and held his jaw up to stop it, and clenched his own now in reaction — trying to push the thought of what it was like to try to seek warmth from a dead person out of his mind too — before he then sighed loudly as he shook it off but rolled over in discomfort anyway. Curling up into a ball, he crossed his arms and rubbed at them even though he knew it was futile, because he’d already spent hours trying everything and he just couldn’t seem to get warm no matter what it was that he did.
That was when he suddenly saw the glow of a fire in the distance, though, one that he immediately recognized as coming from the direction of the farmhouse’s small stable. It was the only place with a roof and was therefore where Erwin had set up command, but the light had not been there a few minutes ago. No, it had been dark and so Levi had assumed Erwin had been asleep, but maybe, like him, he hadn’t been able to and had gotten back up to work after starting his fire again. It wasn’t unlikely much to Levi’s chagrin, although this time he was more focused on the fire, on the promise of warmth, then Erwin’s frustratingly terrible sleeping habits.
Biting his lip, he stared in that direction, at the red, beckoning glow from the fire lighting up the darkness around it. It turned the deep black of the sky and the white of the cursed frost on the ground into something softer and more tolerable in his mind, especially once he imagined Erwin sitting beside it, probably reviewing his maps or plans or reading some book. To Levi, he was a source of emotional warmth as well as physical, and needless to say, given his mood, he only debated it for a single second more before he was standing up, sliding out of his sleeping pack to quietly head in his direction.
He tiptoed over as silently as he could, but still moved fast, keeping his cloak wrapped tight around him like an old woman with a shawl. His eyes watered a bit and his muscles threatened to tremble as the wind started up and a sudden gust of icy air washed over him, but soon he was walking into the stable, stopping in the entryway when he did indeed spot Erwin sitting nearby the fire.
“Levi.” He murmured, without even having to look up. He knew the sound of his footsteps, clearly, but by keeping his eyes on the map he indeed did have, he allowed Levi to stare at the free space next to him with plain, unguarded interest. He gazed at it longingly, in fact, because there was plenty of fucking room and Erwin looked warm and cozy with his own cloak draped over his shoulders, and if they hadn’t been on an expedition with others nearby, he knew he wouldn’t have even hesitated another second before taking his place at his side. “You’re awake. Is something wrong?”
“Yeah. I’m fucking cold.” Levi responded bluntly, watching as Erwin’s head lifted up at that.
His face wore a look of concern, but still, he glanced back down after a moment and didn’t right away motion him forward.
“Yes, it is oddly chilly tonight.”
Levi frowned at that, tightening his cloak around his shoulders. Unable to stop himself from shivering now, he ground his teeth and stared daggers at Erwin. “Yeah, so...are you going to do your job, or what?”
“My job?” Erwin replied, in a tone that was highly amused, as he obviously knew what Levi meant. Was he smiling, though? It was hard to tell in the dim light, but either way, Levi wasn’t really in the mood to play games. “I am doing my job. I’m looking at this map.”
“That isn’t the job I mean, you fucker.”
“Oh? I wasn’t aware that I had been given a second one.”
Levi huffed loudly and dramatically. Any other time, he would have been happy to stand there and banter with Erwin like this until it turned into flirting and then ended in sex, but the cold in combination with his general lack of sleep had sapped what little patience he tended to possess already. He felt like he was going to turn into a block of ice, and his joints, ears, and fingers and toes were starting to ache — and not to mention his nose, which he was pretty sure was going to become numb soon. “Erwin…”
“Alright, I’m sorry. Come here.” Erwin told him then, chuckling a bit at Levi’s desperate tone.
Immediately, Levi strode forward and around the fire to sit down beside him, scooting over until Erwin could wrap his cloak around them both and he was pressed up against the larger man’s side. Almost sighing in relief, he reached out toward the fire to warm his hands, and then leaned in even more when Erwin’s arm rounded his shoulder to make sure he stayed close.
“Better?” Erwin murmured to him, causing Levi to nod right away.
Yes, he thought, already he felt much, much better, although it wasn’t just because the heat from the fire was overtaking him and happily seeping into his body. No, it was also because Erwin was there, and despite the fact that he hadn’t necessarily wanted to admit it, the bad memories he’d been plagued with had made him tense in addition to feeling like he was going to freeze to death all night. Erwin’s presence did a lot to unwind him without him even having to say anything, and he couldn’t help but curl even closer, almost unconsciously, when Erwin started gently rubbing his arm.
“Am I doing my job correctly?” He asked then, in a wry voice that made Levi hum in affirmation.
Erwin’s ‘job,’ which was a joke between them that he’d been referring to, was to warm Levi up.
It wasn’t the first time he’d done so, after all, as it happened all the time in the winter and even on cool summer nights. Once they’d slept together and Levi had discovered that his commander was like a fucking furnace, he’d been unable to help from repeatedly using his body and presence for warmth and comfort. Of course, there were other things that were related to that too...although nothing that they could, or at least should, be doing outside the walls. For that reason, he stayed still and just enjoyed the company and the fact that he was no longer shivering, at least until he realized that Erwin was not reading his map and was instead just idly staring into the fire.
“Hey.” Levi uttered, elbowing him gently to get his attention. “Why are you up anyway? Couldn’t sleep?”
“No…” Erwin replied, sighing as leaned back against the stable wall. Levi did the same, and then even turned a bit so that he was now able to rest his head on Erwin’s chest.
“Were you cold?” He asked, honestly not feeling any surprise at all when Erwin shook his head.
“Not really. I just couldn’t stop thinking about how this weather could hinder things tomorrow. We aren’t prepared for it, and I’m concerned if we get attacked before it warms up our blades will stick, or the horses will be sluggish, or—
“Erwin.” Levi interrupted, knowing for a fact that it was absolutely better to do that than to just let Erwin continue. If he did, then Erwin’s mind would keep providing him with more and more worst case scenario situations until he became even more wound up than he probably already was, and needless to say, that wouldn’t do, not when Levi thought it was important that he get some rest too. “Don’t worry about it. There’s nothing you can do right now. We’ll figure it out in the morning, before the sun comes up. Right now, you should be fucking sleeping.”
“I could say the same thing about you.”
“I’ll be fine. I was just fucking cold.”
“Are you still?”
Levi glanced up at Erwin when he uttered that question, as he had detected a slight change in the tone of his voice — one that almost sounded like mild mischievousness rather than concern.
“A little.” He replied, because it was true.
He was much warmer, but he could still feel a bit of the cold threatening to seep into him from behind, from where he’d leaned back against the wooden wall of the stable which hadn’t been heated by the fire. He wasn’t much bothered by it, however, although Erwin, who paused for a few seconds, suddenly decided to use this as an opportunity to...to kiss him. He did it so quickly that Levi was caught off guard and had to grab onto Erwin’s shoulders for support, which unfortunately then allowed the cloak to slip a bit off his arm and let more chilly air in — not that he really noticed all that much because of Erwin’s insistent lips.
“How about now?” He asked Levi, after a few more moments of continuing the embrace, of parting Levi’s mouth with his tongue and gently, carefully coaxing him into a state where his heart was fucking pounding.
He felt out of breath too, ridiculously enough, but he didn’t have to think too much before he knew how he would respond. “About the same.”
“The same?” Erwin laughed under his breath like he didn’t believe it, but it was a moot point. Levi no longer really cared if he could still feel any cold night air or not, and it was clear that Erwin was now playing some kind of game anyway. “I suppose I’ll have to try something else, then.”
In a flash, Erwin had shifted their positions and laid Levi down, pressing him into the straw-covered floor by climbing on top of him and settling in between his legs. Levi opened them automatically without even thinking about it, and did the same once more with his mouth when Erwin started to kiss him again. This time they didn’t stop, not for a while, and not until Erwin pulled his shirt out of his pants and pushed it up until he could slip his hand inside. His palm ran over his waist, his thumb over his hip bone and part of his belly, and although Levi did feel a brief chill, everywhere Erwin touched him was making his skin feel like it was on fire anyway.
“Is this working?” Erwin breathed into his ear, from where he had nudged Levi’s head aside to kiss at his jaw before going down to his neck.
“It’s...ah, yeah. Fuck...” Levi managed to respond, biting down hard on his lip to contain a low moan when Erwin shifted, pressing his thigh up against the erection he now fucking had. “But...shouldn’t we not be, uh—
It was a poor attempt to protest, and he knew that. He also knew, however, that they were still taking a risk by fooling around not only with others nearby, but outside the goddamn walls. Yeah, sure, it seemed that titans ‘slept’ at night too, but there was always the risk that some abnormal who wasn’t affected by the lack of light would find them and attack. Also, what if they got caught in the act? Their relationship was a secret to everyone but a few, and despite how fraternization was technically against the rules even though it happened all the time and no one was ever punished, it probably wouldn’t set a great example if a cadet walked over and saw their commander with his hand down the captain’s pants while he writhed in the straw.
That was what was happening now, as Erwin had completely ignored his words and instead lowered his hand to hastily undo his gear belts and pants, making quick work of them with the expertise of someone who had spent years undressing himself in the Survey Corps. Before Levi knew it he was palming at his cock through his underwear and making his hips squirm too, all while he pressed his warm, wet mouth over and over again to the sensitive skin of his neck.
“Erwin…” Levi said again, however, shivering for a different reason entirely now even as he uttered another note of concern.
“No one will find us.” Erwin whispered in response this time, pausing for a few seconds but only so that he could open the top half of Levi’s shirt. “Just keep quiet.”
Levi closed his eyes and bit his lip. He wanted to groan at that requirement alone — and also at how the cold had felt suddenly washing over his nipples — but...if Erwin was okay with something, then that was generally enough for him. He’d just wanted to make sure, although part of him suspected that Erwin had started it all in the first place because he’d wanted a distraction, because he’d wished for something else to occupy his mind other than the expedition so that he wouldn’t stay up all night worrying about what ifs anyway . If that was the case then it was no wonder he was so intent on this, but it wasn’t like that changed anything when Levi was happy to provide him with what he needed, especially since it was clear that they could do this without him freezing to death.
Yes, he could still sense that the air was chilly on the outside but on the inside he just felt fucking hot, so much so that if he had time for stupid thoughts he might have imagined that steam was coming off him like a damned titan or something. It was like Erwin’s lips and fingers and everything else of his that touched him were bright points of warmth on his cooler skin, infusing him more and more with the relief that he had needed so much earlier. To be honest, all of it was kind of adding to the excitement he felt for some reason, but regardless of that, getting Erwin’s permission meant that he could let himself go, and so he moved to wind his fingers into Erwin’s hair, bending his knees in an effort to dig his boot heels into the ground so that he could better push himself up into Erwin’s busy hand. Immediately, though, before he could really get going, Erwin grabbed his side and shoved his hips back onto the ground, prompting a whine from Levi as he stopped all movement and glanced up at him.
“Unless you really do want me to stop.” Erwin murmured then, clearly wanting to make sure of something too — just in fucking case.
Thankfully for them both, Levi’s encouragement came just as fast as Erwin’s had earlier. “You’d better not, Blondie. You feel how fucking hard I am? You got me like that, and don’t think for one second that it isn’t your responsibility to do something about it.”
The mischievous smile and low chuckle Erwin let out in response to that sent another shiver up Levi’s spine — right before he gasped as his pants and underwear were suddenly yanked down over his ass. The influx of freezing air did cause an array of tiny goosebumps to rise on his skin so fast that he shuddered a bit, although they all faded seconds later when Erwin returned to press his weight down on top of him again. He was naked like he was now, at least from the waist down to their thighs, and Levi moaned under his breath at the feeling, at the sensation of Erwin’s bare hips pressed against his and at his big, stiff cock resting like a lick of fire over his stomach.
“Shit.” He breathed, grabbing onto Erwin’s back so that he could dig his fingers in and clutch at his shirt. “Fuck.”
“Shh.” Erwin warned gently, even as he shifted to grasp both of their cocks in one hand and started to move.
He kissed him as he did so, though, hard and heatedly, and Levi couldn’t help but make noises into his mouth as Erwin worked to stroke them both. He lifted his hips in time with it too, grinding up against Erwin as best as he could while pressed into the ground, and felt all of his muscles start to clench at the pleasure that proceeded to race up his spine. Fuck, it was good, so good, amazing and euphoric and joyous — something kind of incredible given the shitty weather and the fact that they were camped out in the middle of hell. Honestly, though, after several minutes had passed Levi had completely forgotten about that because all he could think about was Erwin’s wet, warm mouth sucking on his nipple and the way that his free hand grasped at his thigh, as well as the incredibly rapturous sensations from it all that were building so fast his head had started to spin.
Digging his teeth into his bottom lip to hold in his moans, it was probably a miracle that he didn’t taste blood when Erwin suddenly kissed him again and didn’t stop, doing so much more frantically now as their pace increased. He was getting close, Levi could tell, and obviously so was he, but still, while they messily locked lips, the only sounds to be heard in their vicinity were their increasingly heavy panting, the crackling of the fire, and the rustling and jingling of their clothing and gear shifting as they moved. Erwin had grown tense and Levi felt it echoed in the way that his body seemed to be locking up, so much so that he was unable to stop from whimpering into Erwin’s mouth as he dragged his fingers through his hair again and suddenly froze.
It was only for a single split second, of course, before he came in a trembling rush and practically went limp on the ground from the release, somehow still managing to feel Erwin’s forehead pressed against his own and to see a silent cry of ecstasy shaping his open mouth too. He had apparently finished just after he did, Levi thought, but he didn’t stop right away and instead kept going — albeit in a lazy, slow, and uncoordinated manner — as if he was intent on wringing every last ounce of pleasure from both their orgasms. By then, Levi was becoming sensitive though and couldn’t stop from squirming while his toes curled in his boots, even if he couldn’t deny that the way their cocks slid together now, slick and wet with come, was an extremely satisfying sensation.
Finally, Erwin did stop though, moving his arms so that he could rest on his elbows and try to catch his breath. Beneath him, Levi did the same, finding himself staring up into Erwin’s eyes while Erwin gazed back at him. A moment or two passed just like that until Erwin lowered his head to kiss him once more, doing so quickly but lovingly before he practically flopped over onto his back. Levi let out a long, blissful, and contented sigh at that point, and was happy that Erwin moved to find a cloth so that he could clean them both up before he had to do it. He wiped them off, making sure that every last drop was gone Levi’s body — it wasn’t that he was disgusted by it, but who wanted to be sticky on an expedition? — and then grabbed his cloak once he was done, using it to cover them as he laid down and accepted Levi into his arms.
Right away Levi’s head found the crook of Erwin’s neck and stayed there, and although he heard Erwin whispering to him a bit later, saying something that sounded like his name and ‘thank you,’ the only response he was capable of was a quiet hum before he finally drifted off to sleep. He closed his eyes, feeling warm and content in the light of the burning fire as unconsciousness overtook him, but when he opened them again, the logs had been reduced to nothing but glowing embers, and the camp was full of movement, voices, and noise. Still, though, he noted how he was covered with Erwin’s sleeping pack, blanket, and both their cloaks, and had the thought that he felt so pleasantly toasty and snug that he really wished he didn't have to get up.
He knew he had to, of course, because everyone was obviously awake and getting ready, but Erwin was nowhere to be found. Why hadn’t he woken him up too? He could guess why — Erwin wanted him to rest until the very last minute — but Levi knew he had his duties too, and so he rubbed the sleep from his eyes and hastily straightened himself up. He buttoned his shirt and redid the belts of his harness, and slipped out of the pile of makeshift bedding to grab his cloak. After a quick stretch and a yawn, he sneakily crept out from the stable, walking around the back of the ruined house so it would look like he’d just come from where they’d set up the latrines when he emerged.
In his mind he didn’t think anyone suspected a thing, but strangely when he walked over and approached the place where his squad was getting ready, none of them would look him in the eye. Instead, they refused to glance up from the ground when he greeted them, and continued to stare at the horses, at the firepit, at the far away trees — literally anything except Levi as he talked and started to give orders.
“Hey!” He said after about five minutes of that, narrowing his eyes and frowning in confusion. “I’m fucking talking to you guys. Did you all bite your tongues off from shivering last night, or what?”
Even upon hearing him say that, his squad only looked between themselves awkwardly without responding. For some reason, too, they appeared embarrassed and Petra and Oluo’s faces were kind of red, and...what the fuck? Had something happened, or was it because of the cold? Whatever their problem was, they needed to tell him because they were outside the walls and it was important to get their shit straight before they left, because the last thing he’d ever want to do was let Erwin down in any fucking way when he was supposed to have his squad under control and well disciplined and—
Suddenly, before he could finish his thoughts and open his mouth to yell, he heard a loud sniff behind him coming from none other than Mike, who next let out an amused chuckle. As Levi turned around to face him, the last thing he saw was Petra covering her mouth while her eyes practically popped out of her head, which was a sight that Levi then immediately, and unfortunately, understood the reason for: Mike, standing there tall and proud, smirking at him and holding a giant piece of straw that he had just picked out of Levi’s hair.
“Shit!” Levi swore.