Chapter Text
“What’s his name again? Jino? Mino?”
“Kino.”
“Oh yeah, yeah, Gino. Did he know that I’d be at Byungchan's party too?” Wooseok asks, swaying flirtatiously in his black see-through shirt. His neck is adorned by a thin silver choker and black lace. A leather jacket—the one Seungyoun bought him for his 22nd birthday—hangs from his arm.
Seungyoun rolls his eyes. Wooseok needs to get it through his pretty head that not everything revolves around him. They broke up roughly three months ago and haven’t seen each other in person since. Admittedly, Seungyoun has gone down several stalk-your-ex rabbit holes but Wooseok doesn’t need to know that. And from social media alone, Wooseok has seemed more or less fine. He still posts selfies every few days, ootds, random shots of trees, his iced coffee orders, wild flowers on the walk home, take-out boxes, their common friends that are now more Wooseok’s friends exclusively. As for Seungyoun, he posted a photo of himself and Kino—a guy he’s been sleeping with—to Instagram story once, amidst all the mirror selfies taken at work on days he needed a self-esteem boost. Seungyoun has been crying at work during breaks but thankfully no one noticed other than Hangyul—the lead choreographer who is also Seungyoun’s hoobae from school. Seungyoun blushes a little at the thought that Wooseok still views his Insta stories. Maybe he should block the guy.
“Boyfriend?” Wooseok asks, sipping his Mojito as he follows Seungyoun to the smoking area. In the distance, Yohan and Seungwoo and Sejun and Jinhyuk are all grinding on birthday boy Byungchan like some kind of orgy. Since when does Wooseok even smoke?
“Uh… yeah.” Seungyoun resigns. He doesn’t need to explain the intricacies of his social relationships to Wooseok. After all, they’re not the kind of exes that would remain in each other’s life. It was bad. At least from Seungyoun’s point of view. If anything, he needed a Kim Wooseok detox.
“Since when?”
“Uh… like, a few weeks ago.” This is partly true. He did meet Kino from Grindr maybe two weeks ago. They find a spot on the couch. Seungyoun fishes out his Marlboro pack and lighter.
Wooseok nods thoughtfully, “I see.”
“Are you not… smoking?” Seungyoun gestures. Wooseok has made himself comfortable on the couch, body turned slightly towards Seungyoun. Besides them, there is only a handful of people in the room. Judging from the ashtrays, many smokers have come and gone and it’s getting late enough in the night that the staff isn’t bothered to empty out the ashtrays anymore.
“I don’t smoke. And I thought you quit already?”
Seungyoun scoffs. Well, he did. But only because Wooseok said he hated cigarette breath. Guess that was one of the rare ways Kim Wooseok was good for his well-being. “Listen, Wooseok, did you have something to say? If not—"
“Do you fuck Kino on the green couch with that coffee stain from the time we had a quickie in between your meetings?”
“What?” Seungyoun thought he was imagining things. Who says shit like that to their ex in a crowded club? Granted, they’re in a more secluded alcove. But still. They’re far enough away from speakers that Seungyoun could hear Wooseok pretty clearly. And he did say that. He did ask Seungyoun point-blank about his sex life.
“Or do you do it on the kitchen counter? Remember that time we tried to bake pineapple cake but started fucking and forgot about the cake?” Wooseok giggles, “Minwoo hyung almost evicted us for setting off the fire alarm for the nth time.”
Seungyoun frowns, “okay, that’s it, I’m done talking to you.”
“Why?” Wooseok lunges forward as Seungyoun makes to stand up. He presses a knee down between Seungyoun’s legs, barely missing his crotch. “Why, Seungyoun? Why can’t I fondly recall the passionate sex we had? Is it because you’re dating Gino?”
“Kino.”
“Whatever.” Wooseok pouts, tilting his face slightly like a celebrity finding his angle for the camera.
Seungyoun gulps nervously. His heart is beating out of his chest. He tries to look away from Wooseok’s glittery eyeshadow only to land on the sight of Wooseok’s plump glossy lips. He hates how pretty Wooseok looks in this light.
“Or are you afraid you might want me back?”
“You’re so full of yourself,” Seungyoun scoffs, looking away because he might do something really stupid if he stares just a second longer.
“But you find that cute, don’t you?” Wooseok smirks, leaning closer, a hand skirting Seungyoun’s thigh.
“Stop that,” Seungyoun grimaces, “are you seriously doing this?”
“Doing what?” Wooseok blinks innocently.
“This! This! Throwing yourself at me.” Seungyoun tries to sound firm and intimidating. But judging from Wooseok’s reaction, he isn’t doing a very good job.
“Look me in the eye and tell me I’m not turning you on.”
“What?”
Wooseok places a hand on the back of the couch, effectively trapping Seungyoun, “admit it. You think about me when you kiss Kino, don’t you?”
Shivers shoot through Seungyoun. His face warms unbearably at Wooseok’s statement. He knows that Wooseok is just shooting in the dark, knows that Wooseok is simply putting on a brave face and that he can’t possibly know for a fact that Seungyoun is still hung up over him. After all, it was Seungyoun who put an end to their relationship.
“Do you think he can taste me on your mouth?” Wooseok muses.
Seungyoun’s eyes widen in horror. And lust. He is frozen in his seat, trapped physically by Wooseok now straddling him.
“You know, I still think about you when I masturbate.”
Oh my god. Oh my fucking god. Can Wooseok tell how hard Seungyoun just got from where he is sitting?
Seungyoun looks up in fear and notices the lust in Wooseok’s eyes. He realizes Wooseok is hard too. They’re in a club full of people and they’re both hard. Seungyoun glances out the clear glass doors, hoping someone would save him from Wooseok’s hostage. Wooseok is basically sitting on his throbbing dick, telling him with both words and action that he wants to fuck.
“I’m going to kiss you,” Wooseok declares—both a warning and a plea.
Seungyoun knows he should turn away. Or better yet, he should push Wooseok aside and leave right now. Granted he doesn’t actually have a boyfriend to go home to. Kino and he have agreed to keep it casual and continue seeing other people. There’s no one for him to stay faithful to. The real reason Seungyoun shouldn’t give in to this is because Wooseok is like a forest fire. He burns everything he touches. Wooseok came into his life a year ago and ruined every aspect of his life in just nine months. (Or maybe, the walking hot mess that is Kim Wooseok merely revealed to Seungyoun his own mess that he had so carefully compartmentalized).
“Don’t say I didn’t warn you,” is all he hears before Wooseok’s lips are on his. Seungyoun could wax poetics about how soft Wooseok’s lips are, how good he smells, how skillful and practiced the hands that are woven in Seungyoun’s hair are. But what really gets to him is the desperation. Wooseok all but melts against him. His mouth is so hot and wet, and he takes large gasps of air in between nibbling and biting Seungyoun’s lips. It is clear how much Wooseok missed him. When Wooseok drags his hands from Seungyoun’s hair to cup his face, he could feel Wooseok’s fingers trembling. So, he kisses back. Because he isn’t capable of rejecting Wooseok. He just wants to soothe and comfort the other boy. He kisses back as if saying I’m here, I’m here, you can take your time.
But then something shifts. The vulnerable and desperate boy in his arms suddenly turns aggressive in a way he can’t comprehend. He starts kissing Seungyoun like he resents Seungyoun. A hand sneaks in between Seungyoun’s legs to palm his hard cock but not in a pleasure-giving way. It feels malicious. Wooseok pushes his tongue in further, pressing Seungyoun’s mouth wide open. He sucks on Seungyoun’s tongue, then his bottom lip. Then he turns slightly to one side, kissing and sucking Seungyoun’s face all the way to his ear.
“Oh no, you just cheated on your boyfriend,” Wooseok whispers. Seungyoun springs from the chair like he was burned.
“What the fuck??”
Wooseok sits back and makes a show of wiping his mouth. He shrugs like he didn’t just go on a mission to make Seungyoun a cheater. And for what?
“Did you just—what are you trying to do?” Seungyoun flails around in disbelief.
Wooseok doesn’t reply. He grabs his jacket from the couch and fishes out his phone to order an Uber. Seungyoun is seething. He knew Wooseok took their breakup hard, but he didn’t think Wooseok would go this far. All the shit he suffered during their relationship came rushing to the forefront of his mind.
“Gosh, this is exactly why we broke up.”
“Why?” Wooseok whips around.
“What?”
“Why did we break up, Seungyoun?”
“…Are you asking because you really don’t know?”
“Everything was fine.”
“Jesus, Wooseok—”
“Everything was fine and then I went on a work trip and then, boom, you texted me saying it was over.”
Seungyoun glances at him, debating whether it is worth getting to the bottom of this or not.
“So, no, Seungyoun, I still have no fucking clue what happened. I honestly thought it was one of your pranks again.”
Seungyoun squares his jaw. His resolve chips at its edges. He knows Wooseok isn’t trying to gaslight him on purpose but it sure as hell feels like it. Wooseok has always been so good at making things seem like his fault, so good at dusting his hands off of any responsibility. He looks up at Wooseok’s red-rimmed eyes, his quivering lips thinning into a line in an effort to hold it together.
Seungyoun sighs. Maybe he should have done this when they broke up. He knows it’s a shitty thing to break up with someone via text. But he couldn’t face Wooseok. He really did love the other boy. It pained him end it, but he had to. For his own sanity. He had told himself at the time that he’ll explain his reasons to Wooseok eventually. But it was never the right time. I’ll talk to him properly after a week, after we both have some time to think about it. A week came and went. I’ll give it 3 weeks. It’s just too fresh right now. No, a few months, after I can be in the same room with him and not feel the damn butterflies. If he had the resolve to break up with Wooseok to his face, he would have.
“You were distant," says Seungyoun. Wooseok stares at him like he grew a second head.
“Wooseok, we dated for almost a year, but I barely knew what you were thinking or feeling half the time.”
“What? I—” Wooseok gapes at him like a fish.
“You would… get really upset sometimes. At things. Out of nowhere. And then when I asked if you wanted to talk about it, you said no and changed the topic like nothing happened.”
“Because nothing did!”
Seungyoun wants to pull his hair out, “see? This is exactly what I’m talking about. You’re… you… you don’t want to feel your feelings. Or you just don’t want to share them with me. I don’t know. It’s frustrating to be with someone who says everything’s alright when it’s not. And then that made me feel needy and awkward to talk about anything real at all.”
“So, you broke up with me because I didn’t have deep feelings to share with you?? Because I didn’t like to wallow in shit? I just deal with things better on my own! Is that so wrong?”
“I—because you didn’t deal with things, Wooseok! You didn’t process things with me. You didn’t process things by yourself. I had no fucking idea what you were feeling or what was going on in your life half the time. And we fucking lived together for 3 months!”
“So, us having a good time wasn’t enough for you?? Us hanging out and watching TV and eating together and going places. None of that was enough for you?”
“Oh my god that’s—you’re so infuriating. Don’t get a lover then. Just get a dog or something.”
“Seungyoun, this is so ridiculous. We had fun, didn’t we? We enjoyed each other’s company, right?”
“We… we did. We did,” Seungyoun mutters, “but I was lonely.”
Wooseok doesn’t say anything. It must be close to 3am because behind them, the bar staff was beginning to clean up. Other smokers have left the room one by one when they were caught up in each other.
“I’m sorry I broke up with you via text. It was a cowardly move, and you didn’t deserve it. I guess… let’s put an end to everything now. Let’s do a clean break-up, finally.” Seungyoun braves himself, “I didn’t know how to be your boyfriend anymore, Wooseok. You were hard to love.” They stand still, letting it sink in.
“Excuse me, we’re closing up now.”
“Oh, sorry, we’re… we’re heading out now. Thanks for letting us know,” Seungyoun gathers his coat while Wooseok still stands there like a statue.
“Come on, I’ll get y—”
“Got it.”
Seungyoun finally takes a good look at Wooseok. He looks blank and sobered, like he stayed up all night gaming and not drinking, dancing, and grinding on top of his ex.
“I guess… there’s nothing I can do about that.”
“What?”
When Wooseok peers up at Seungyoun, he realizes that underneath the stoic front, Wooseok is trying not to break. His eyes are glossy, and his nose has turned red.
“Sorry you had to force yourself to love me. I hope you’re happier now,” says Wooseok before he rushes out the door.