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Barba was in a foul mood by the time they reached the safe house. Honestly, he’d been in a foul mood before the five hour car ride, but it had clearly not improved. Rollins, who had been expecting an Abe Lincoln-style log cabin at the very worst, was pleasantly surprised. Their safe house may be the ass-end of nowhere, but at least it was insulated, with heating, running water, a fully stocked fridge and pantry, a stove and a fireplace. Rollins smiled to herself, looking around the small but neat little house. It was cozy, like a picture in a catalogue advertising alpine vacations.
Rollins was about to feel good about the next few days or however long they had to stay here, when she saw Barba’s expression. Besides looking absolutely shattered with exhaustion, he was surveying his surroundings like they really were in a log cabin with no heating and wind whistling through the slatted floorboards. Rollins sighed. It was going to be a long few days. Or few weeks. There was no saying how long they’d be there, hiding out from the very real death threats targeted at her and Barba, side effects of trying to make rape charges stick against members of organized crime.
“Why couldn’t they have stuck us in a safe house in the city?” Barba grumbled for perhaps the twentieth time. Rollins shrugged. She had gotten much better at taking things in stride and accepting what she couldn’t change. Barba, apparently, not so much.
“You should get some sleep,” she said, because he clearly needed to. When was the last time he slept? Days ago? Greying stubble darkened his jaw and the dark circles under his eyes made him look decades older. His usually immaculate suit was rumpled by the long car ride and it made him look in even worse shape.
Barba grunted and went to find the bedroom, which wasn’t hard. The house was only three rooms. A combined kitchen and living room with only a wall separating the pantry and laundry area. The bedroom and bathroom constituted the rest of the house. What more did anyone really need, Rollins thought optimistically, but she refrained from saying so out loud.
“Oh, perfect,” she heard Barba groan from in the bedroom. It was clear why the instant she poked her head in. One bed.
“You go ahead and take it, I’ll sleep on the couch,” she volunteered at once. Barba looked like he was going to keel over from fatigue.
“I can’t just –“ he began, but Rollins cut him off.
“Don’t be a martyr, just take the bed. We can always share, we’re both adults.”
Barba glared at her, but didn’t object. She shut the door and left him alone, wanting to distance herself from his negative energy, hoping that some rest would improve his mood. They were clearly in it for the long haul.
Barba hadn’t made a peep since she shut the door, so Rollins went about exploring. Which didn’t take long. They had enough food at least, and Rollins discovered a small woodshed fully stocked in case they lost power and needed heat. There was even a cabinet full of booze, she noted with a small smile. Not that she should be drinking, really, but it might be good for Barba’s attitude.
The snow had piled up so thickly this far north, it had taken them forever to even reach their destination. If they needed supplies in the little village it would take a good hour to get there. They were well and truly isolated, with only a satellite phone if they needed help. Rollins felt weirdly good about the whole thing. She had actually gotten used to solitude, rest and relaxation. Being stuck with a grumpy Barba wasn’t even half bad, provided he mellowed out a little.
Rollins lit a fire after some trial and error and realized their entertainment options were pretty limited. There wasn’t even a TV. Just a little shelf with the type of battered paperbacks one would buy in an airport and some old fashioned board games. Well, she thought, maybe Barba would like Monopoly.
Rollins chose one of the trashy romance books from the shelf and curled up on the couch under an ugly afghan. It was rather cozy, with night falling and the fire crackling merrily away.
Her comfort was breached only slightly when she had to use the bathroom, which was only accessible through the bedroom. She wavered for a minute, but eventually she really had no choice. She eased open the door gently, trying not to make a sound. She peaked in and saw Barba sprawled on the bed, clearly in a deep sleep. His face was peaceful and lax and he was snoring gently, his hair a mess. Rollins watched him for a moment, unable to help herself. He looked so… nice. Not grumpy and snipping at her. Younger and softer. As she watched, he shifted feebly, making a small, distressed noise in his throat. He was clearly still asleep, his eyes moving rapidly beneath the lids. Rollins flushed, feeling like she was spying on something she shouldn’t be. She quickly turned into the bathroom and shut the door.
Rollins woke up the next day to the sound of the shower running and a nasty crick in her neck. She groaned, rolling her neck and feeling it pop and tense. Sleeping on the couch hadn’t been a great idea, but the thought of sliding into bed next to a peacefully sleeping Barba was too awkward to consider. She stood up, stretching her sore back. She heard the shower turn off in the next room.
By the time Barba emerged, Rollins had started on breakfast, which was cornflakes and instant coffee. She didn’t want to think about Barba’s reaction to the caffeine situation. There was only instant coffee and a box of Lipton tea bags.
So she was dwelling on that and was completely unprepared for Barba in sweatpants. Of course she had seen him in casual wear a few memorable times, but she had never actually considered what Barba wore around the house when he wasn’t working. Sweatpants, apparently. And a white t-shirt. With his hair still damp and his jaw freshly shaven he actually… looked really good. Rollins blinked at him, hoping she wasn’t blushing too obviously.
Barba didn’t appear to notice. He walked over to examine the contents of the cabinets and made a face at the canister of instant coffee.
“How was the couch?” he asked mildly. Rollins shrugged.
“Not great, as couches go,” she said.
“You can have the bed tonight, it’s only fair.”
“We can both have it,” she said firmly. She really didn’t want to sleep on the couch again, but she didn’t want to subject Barba to that either. “It’s big enough for both of us.”
Barba only grunted, looking irritated. Rollins tried not the roll her eyes as she finished her cornflakes.
“I’m taking a shower,” she announced, dumping her bowl in the sink.
The bathroom was still full of steam and the smell of Barba’s aftershave. It was weirdly intoxicating, spicy and sharp. This was going to be more awkward than she anticipated.
After her shower, Rollins tried to go for a walk, but the snow was so deep it was a wasted effort. So it was back to her trashy romance novel and the fireplace. Barba was occupied with… work.
“Are you serious?” she said, when he pulled out his briefcase and started unloading case files. He shot her a look with a raised eyebrow.
“What else am I going to do? I can’t even get reception here.”
Rollins suppressed the urge to ask what he normally did on his days off. She had a feeling the answer would depress her.
For most of the day, they politely ignored each other. Barba, at least, seemed in a better mood than the previous day. But his distress over the lack of real coffee and internet access was palpable. He kept sighing deeply and shuffling his papers around like they had personally offended him. Rollins was beginning to get annoyed.
“I going to make lunch,” she announced. “Do you want lunch?”
“What?” Barba said, distracted.
“You know, the meal traditionally eaten in the middle of the day? I could make grilled cheese. Do you like grilled cheese?”
Barba stared at her a moment, nonplussed.
“Sure, whatever,” he finally said.
Rollins wasn’t much of a cook, but she could grill a cheese. They only had white bread and Kraft singles, which was slightly depressing but oddly reminiscent of childhood.
“Just like momma used to make,” she said lightly as she served Barba his sandwich.
“Thanks,” he said softly. And then after a pause, “Really, thanks. You didn’t have to do that.”
Rollins shrugged, brushing it off at once.
“I don’t mind. And if I didn’t feed you, you’d probably forget to eat.”
Barba nodded and munched away without further comment.
Rollins had finished her trashy romance by the time evening fell again and she was annoyed. Mostly with the book and how clichéd and unfulfilling it was, but also by being cooped up. At first, she had enjoyed the cozy solitude but now she itched to get up and do something.
“Let me make dinner,” Barba said, finally packing up his work.
“What were you going to make?” Rollins asked, trying not to sound too skeptical.
He looked morose as he examined the cabinets and fridge.
“No rice. How isn’t there any rice? No beans. No meat besides hamburger. Depressing. There’s pasta. And jarred sauce. I can make pasta.”
While Barba proved that he was a competent enough cook not to burn water, Rollins broke in the liquor cabinet. She was just antsy enough to throw caution to the wind.
“Pick your poison,” she said holding up a few bottles.
Barba raised an eyebrow.
“Are you sure that’s wise?” he said.
Rollins didn’t appreciate the slightly patronizing tone.
“Do you have a better idea to pass the time? We don’t even know how long we’re stuck here.”
Barba sighed, as if in defeat, as Rollins poured two generous portions of vodka and topped them off with orange juice.
“Cheers,” she said, handing it him and he dutifully clinked their glasses before taking a sip.
By the time the food was done, Rollins was feeling a little buzzed. Eating pasta and crappy jarred spaghetti sauce with Barba was actually not so bad. He was acting less grumpy, anyway.
“You know, this has the potential to actually be fun,” she said. Barba frowned.
“How so?”
“Come on! It’s like camp. Except we’re allowed to drink and there are no counselors. Well, except you, Counselor.”
Barba actually smiled. She liked his smile, crooked as it was charming.
“It’s not really like camp,” he said. “No lake for skinny dipping, no awkward dances to suffer through. We do have a fireplace, though.”
“And Monopoly. I bet you’re great at Monopoly.”
By the time Monopoly actually got started, Rollins was leaving the orange juice out altogether.
“Maybe you should slow down,” Barba said, but he didn’t object whenever Rollins sloshed more vodka into his own glass.
“What could happen, a DUI? I have nowhere to drive to. And the closest casino must be hours away. There isn’t even a pack of cards, if I wanted to gamble.”
Barba snorted. Rollins wasn’t sure how he managed to own all the railroads, but she was vaguely certain he had cheated.
“And nothing to gamble with either,” he said.
“There’s always strip poker,” she said before she could stop herself.
But Barba only laughed.
“Or strip Monopoly,” he said.
“Well, it’s either that or strip Candy Land,” Rollins said. “Which would be weird. I’m down to play, but only if you stop cheating.”
Barba stared at her, open mouthed.
“I’m not… cheating,” he finally said.
“Yes you are! I should never have let you be the banker.”
Barba blinked at her, slowly.
“How would strip Monopoly even work?” he asked.
“I don’t know,” Rollins said. “You lose an item of clothing when you go to jail. And when you sell property. Deal?”
He glared at her through narrowed eyes for a moment but then nodded.
Strip Monopoly proved to be a terrible idea. For one, Rollins was well and truly trashed and Barba wasn’t far behind. And, since they had both spent the day bumming around in sweatpants, neither of them had much clothing to remove. And Rollins was really bad at Monopoly.
“This is bullshit,” she said, forced to sell a property and remove either her shirt or her pants, after losing her hoodie and both her socks, she was all out of options. Barba was looking unbearably smug.
“This was your idea,” he said gleefully. He had only removed his socks so far.
“You’re cheating, I told you to stop skimming off the top of the money stacks.”
“I am not!” he declared, indignant. Then, after a pause, “You don’t have to take your clothes off, it’s just a stupid game.”
“I’ve had worse losses,” she said, stripping off her pants. At least she was still wearing panties. But one more loss and she’d be bearing one private part or another.
Barba was still looking uncomfortable. Maybe because Rollins wasn’t wearing pants. Rollins decided he needed more vodka.
“Drink up, celebrate your win,” she said, pouring him some. Barba didn’t hesitate to gulp it down.
After a few more rolls, Rollins still had her dignity intact, but Barba hadn’t lost anymore clothing.
“Hey, I said no cheating!” she said as he counted out money for himself.
“I wasn’t!”
“Yes you were, I saw you take two twenties, put one back!”
“I only took one.”
“Fucking! Lies!”
Rollins was far gone enough to leap over the table and tackle him before she really knew what she was doing. Barba reacted with a surprised yelp as Rollins landed on him, trying to grab the twenties from his clenched fist.
“Give it up, Barba,” she said. “Don’t make me cuff you.”
Barba wasn’t going to give in that easily, it seemed. He tried to curl away from her, protecting the fake money clamped in his fist. But Rollins knew how to subdue a suspect and soon she was straddling him, holding him down by the shoulders as he wriggled beneath her. All at once, Barba tensed and then relented, opening his fist and letting the crumpled paper spill out.
“Here, here, take it,” he said, breathlessly. “I give up.”
But Rollins didn’t get off him.
“Do you promise to stop cheating?” she said, triumphant.
“Yeah, yeah, I promise,” he said, nodding stiffly. “Please get off.”
A few things became apparent to Rollins all at once. First of all, she was straddling Barba while only wearing panties and a camisole. Second of all, she was sitting right on his lap. And he was… responding.
Rollins would have liked to blame it on the alcohol for not getting off right away. Instead, she pushed down with her hips. Barba, who was rapidly turning red, gasped sharply and pushed against her reflexively.
“Do you want me to?” she said softly, forgetting all about the game. “Get off?”
Barba didn’t answer. He was breathing heavier, red in the face, not looking her in the eye. Rollins rolled her hips again and Barba shuddered, grabbing her thighs and squeezing. Rollins ground against him, feeling how hard he was through his sweats. When she moved at a certain angle, she felt her clit drag along his length and the fabric of her panties. She did it again and moaned at the sensation. Barba moaned along with her.
“You like that?” she whispered, still pinning him to the couch by the shoulders.
Barba groaned in response, now panting beneath her. She arched her back for a better angle and moved in tight circles as Barba’s hands shifted to grab her ass as he thrust against her. Rollins desperately wanted to pull down his sweats and feel his skin against hers, but she didn’t want to break the rhythm, the steady rocking she had fallen into, grinding her clit against his erection. Barba released a breathy, desperate sound and squeezed his eyes shut. Rollins didn’t want to stop, she was close, she was so close…
Suddenly, Barba tensed beneath her, groaning and shuddering. Rollins watched in dismay as he thrust roughly, coming with a gasp and a spreading wet patch in his sweatpants. He lay there still panting as Rollins glared at him in frustration.
“Really?” she said right at the same time he muttered, “Sorry.”
“It’s um… been awhile,” he continued softly, not opening his eyes. “That doesn’t – usually happen.”
“It’s OK,” Rollins muttered, disappointed but feeling bad for him.
“Let me…” Barba said, trailing off as he slipped his fingers under the waistband of her panties. Rollins allowed him to roll them over, a little awkwardly, until he was lying between her legs, shimmying down so that he was kneeling on the floor, head level with her crotch.
Licking her lips, Rollins watched him pull down her panties, lifting up her hips to help him. Barba made brief eye contact as he lowered his head, kissing her inner thigh. Rollins gasped, lifting her hips a little as he nuzzled the outside of her cunt and then licked deeply. He was good at this, and Rollins had to be impressed at his coordination while drunk as he tongued her clit. She arched her hips as he held her thighs steady, licking and sucking and swirling his tongue until she was shaking beneath him, crying out briefly as she pushed against his face. Rollins fell back, panting, as Barba gave her a long, lazy lick, making her hips jerk.
“That was – yeah, that was good,” she said, out of breath.
“Oh,” Barba said, straightening up. “Good.”
“C’mere,” she slurred, pulling at his arm.
Barba crawled up her body and fell into her arms, finally kissing her, delving into her mouth at once. Rollins tasted herself on his tongue and sucked hard on his lower lip. She didn’t want to think about how every part of this was probably a mistake, because they had already gone this far. It didn’t feel like real life anyway, locked away in an isolated cabin on some mountainside. She kissed him harder, feeling him move against her. He was wearing too many clothes. She wanted to feel his bare skin. She pushed a hand up the back of his t-shirt while pushing down his sweats with the other hand. She felt him surge against her, and distantly heard the clatter of the table being shoved away, their game of Monopoly crashing to the floor. Rollins couldn’t have cared less. Barba helped her, fumbling with shaking hands as he tugged his shirt over his head, kicking off his sweatpants, at the same time pushing up her camisole to palm her breast. His hand was so big, she felt small beneath him. Rollins moaned, shifting so that he could lie on top of her. She could feel his cock on her thigh, sticky but half hard again. She rubbed eagerly against it, smiling when she heard him groan.
“This is – this is,” he stuttered, as she maneuvered to pull her camisole off.
“Stop talking,” she said, not wanting to hear how this was a bad idea. She just wanted to feel him.
Barba complied and dipped his head to capture a nipple in his mouth. Rollins inhaled sharply, biting her lip and arching up against him.
“Jesus,” she muttered and Barba smirked, pulling up to kiss her again.
She pushed at his shoulders as he kissed her deeply, moving him so that she could straddle his hips, holding herself steady on the back of the couch. Barba sighed heavily, cradling her hips as she rocked against him. He was hard again, pressed between her legs. Barba groaned, his head falling back against the couch. Rollins lifted her hips just enough to fondle him, stroking the length of his cock. Barba exhaled slowly, trying to control his breathing. Rollins sunk down around him, feeling him thrust up to meet her. She felt a high, sharp sound escape her as she moved her hips, taking him deeper. Barba pressed his hot face into her neck, gasping. They fell into a quick, steady pace, both on the far side of desperate and Rollins dug her nails into his shoulder as she clenched around him, still sensitive from her orgasm. Barba thrust up as much as he could, holding her hips firmly. Her second orgasm hit her hard and sudden, and she screamed faintly, nearly a sob as she went limp above him. Barba kept fucking her as she came, holding her so close she could feel the frantic pounding of his heart. She felt him go stiff and moan softly into her neck, rocking his hips in a hard, shuddering rhythm as he came again, drawing it out as long as he could.
Rollins cradled his head as he softened and slipped out of her, his breath puffing against her overheated skin. She ran her fingers through his hair, enjoying the close, intimate contact. Barba wrapped his arms tightly around her hips, pulling her close.
“Let’s go to bed,” Rollins said softly, still petting his hair. “We can share, right?”
Barba only mumbled in response, squeezing her briefly and then letting go. Rollins kissed the side of his mouth as his lips twitched into a half smile.
“Yeah, we can share,” he said.
Rollins would never have pegged Barba for a cuddler. But she found herself proven wrong waking up the next morning with Barba wrapped so tightly around her it was like being tangled in seaweed. Sweaty, man seaweed. Rollins was much more accustomed to being the big spoon so Barba holding her in his sleep like she was going to slip away forever was slightly claustrophobic. Not to mention how her mouth was insanely dry and parched, she had a pounding headache and desperately needed to pee.
But even as Rollins started to wiggle away and Barba tried to pull her back, Rollins found it incredibly endearing. Really, she missed having a proper cuddle. And Barba clearly did too. She wondered how long it had been for him.
Still, she really needed to escape for the time being. Barba made a sleepy, distressed noise as she tried to extract herself. As he truly returned to the land of the living, he seemed to realize what he was doing and pulled away. Rollins turned to look at him as she got up. He lay on his side, eyes still closed, big hands curled up by his face, which was slightly pink.
After gulping down water and relieving herself, Rollins felt marginally better. And getting into a warm bed with an extra cuddly Barba was extremely appealing. Barba however, had gotten up and put on a t-shirt and boxer shorts.
“Morning,” he said, still pink and obviously avoiding her gaze.
“Morning,” Rollins said, disappointed at his sudden modesty.
“Excuse me,” he said softly, making a beeline for the bathroom.
Rollins frowned, getting back into bed. Now that she was comfortable, she wasn’t eager to get dressed and go back to politely ignoring his existence. She figured Barba was probably embarrassed for getting so drunk. And for having sex with her. Rollins, who had had her share of disastrous drunken mistakes, didn’t want to see it that way. She actually liked Barba. And they were stuck in this cabin together for who knows how long.
Once Barba emerged from his own ablutions, Rollins rolled over and watched him fidget slightly by the door.
“Come back to bed,” she said softly.
Barba still didn’t look at her.
“Come on,” she continued. “We’ve got nothing else to do.”
When he finally looked at her, there was a crease between Barba’s eyebrows.
“Don’t you think this is bad idea?” he said slowly. “We work together.”
“We’re not working now,” she said.
Barba blinked at her as though he couldn’t think of a way to argue with that logic.
“Come on, it’s not even nine,” she said. “Neither of us have anywhere to go.”
She could see his defenses crumbling. Rollins smiled broadly as he crawled into bed, pulling back the covers and sliding against her still naked body. He sighed so deeply, so contentedly that Rollins cuddled him close. He nuzzled her neck, curling his hands around her ribs. Rollins wrapped her arms around his shoulders, feeling how broad he was. It wasn’t long before she felt him hardening against her leg. She smiled again and pushed against him, feeling his sharp inhale on her skin.
Barba kissed her neck, soft as first and sucking gently, kissing down her collarbone to her breasts. Rollins couldn’t stop grinning as he kissed her nipple, rolling the other one between his fingers. She grabbed at the back of his shirt, pulling it up and over his head, breaking contact for only a moment before he went back, making her squirm and moan beneath him. She wouldn’t have expected Barba to be so affectionate, so eager to please his partner. Maybe she should have.
He teased her long enough to leave her breathless, bucking against his thigh. The crooked grin was back when he raised his head, even though he was extremely flushed.
“Cocky, aren’t you,” Rollins said as he bent down to kiss her mouth again.
She rolled them over, pushing him back against the bed and palming him through his shorts. He moaned and thrust into her hand. He was very hard and leaking a wet spot on the front of his boxers. Rollins grinned and cupped his balls, teasing him with a deep squeeze. She tugged down his shorts and licked the leaking tip of his cock, making him swear and clutch the sheets. He was so sensitive, so responsive, already breathing heavily and squeezing his eyes shut. Rollins grinned and stroked his shaft only briefly, teasing his slit with her tongue again.
“Jesus,” he muttered, licking his lips and visibly trying to still his hips rising off the bed.
Rollins only smiled and swallowed the rest of his cock, as much as she could fit, hearing a choked groan in his throat. She went slowly, drawing it out, seizing her chance to make him squirm. She squeezed his balls a few times, making him tense and curse and she liked how he was obviously trying not to thrust into her mouth, but it was clearly a struggle. She stroked the base as she picked up the pace only slightly hearing his low, guttural groan.
“Fuck – ah – Rollins, wait,” she heard him babble, the way his hips kept jerking sharply indicating how close he was. She didn’t slow down.
“Oh God, I’m gonna – Rollins, Amanda, please,” he muttered quickly.
Rollins finally let his cock slide out of her mouth and looked up, grinning, at his red face.
“Who’s cocky now,” he said through heavy breaths.
Rollins fought the urge to giggle like a schoolgirl, but she was still beaming like a fool as she sat up to kiss him, his big hands cupping her face at once, kissing her deep and desperate, like he couldn’t help himself. It was his turn to push her back and she let him slide up between her legs, his hands shaking only slightly as he pushed inside her. She moaned softly as he rocked against her with deliberately slow strokes, as if trying to control himself.
She gripped his shoulders hard, vaguely remembering digging her nails into his skin the night before. The thought made heat pulse through her and she arched up against him. He settled himself firmly between her legs, holding himself up to that he could reach between their bodies and thumb her clit as he slid inside her. Barba seemed determined to get her off first this time and Rollins couldn’t be more appreciative as his broad thumb circled her clit quickly, thrusting with slow, even strokes. She was close, so close that he soon had her coming hard, shaking and clenching around him, leaving fresh scratches on his shoulder as she cried out.
At last, having accomplished his goal, Barba began thrusting into her in earnest. He panted hard, buried his face in her hair and drove into her roughly, a hurried, desperate pace that within seconds had him coming with a long, drawn out groan and a series of short, breathy sighs as he pulled her close against him. He stayed on top of her for a few breathless seconds, pleasantly solid, but still crushing her slightly, before rolling off her to the side.
Rollins’s contended smile was apparently permanently affixed to her face. Barba’s inner cuddle monster had come back in full force as he snuggled close, pressing his face into her neck again. Rollins sighed, petting his hair, loving its softness and how it glinted grey in the pale wintery sunlight. If this was how they were going to spend their time, then she really couldn’t complain.