Chapter Text
There are lessons that we learn in childhood that stick with us. We make observations that we mimic, even before we know what they mean. The first lesson and observation that Izuku can remember happened shortly after the doctors appointment where he learned he’d never have a quirk.
His father, his mother’s soulmate, left. Izuku could still hear the awful things he said when he did, about how soulmates meant nothing, how he never loved either Izuku or his mother. How he’d rather turn his own flames on his soulmate tattoo than ever see it again.
After he left, Izuku watched his mother dry her tears and very carefully wrap the mark on her wrist up, hiding it from the world.
Izuku never saw the mark again.
His first lesson, soulmates weren’t real. His first observation, hide the mark away forever.
So, he did. He hid away the mark on his hip, even from himself. Even when he knew that the once childhood friend turned bully had the same mark.
Bakugou never covered his mark. It was on the center of his chest, and Izuku was subjected to seeing it every time the others shirt was off. Three triangles, overlapping to make a valknut. When researching, some people said it meant, earth, heaven, and hell.
With how Bakugou was determined to make Izuku’s life hell, he believed it.
There were only two people that knew Izuku’s soulmate secret before UA, his mother and All Might. His mother, because of course she’d seen the mark, and of course she’d seen her best friend’s son’s mark. Izuku wondered if Bakugou’s parents knew too, with how they both looked at Izuku with pitiful looks anytime Bakugou’s mark came into view, but he was never certain. All Might, because the man had already shared the biggest secret in his life, Izuku only found it fair to share his own. Plus, the hero had been more of a father to Izuku than his own father had ever been.
All Might, who preferred for Izuku to call him Yagi at school and Toshinori outside of being a teacher, understood as best as he could for someone without a soulmate. He did try to tell Izuku that some soulmates truly loved each other, but Izuku knew if he ever told Bakugou, it would end in disaster.
It wasn’t like the bullying gave Izuku a better impression of soulmates through the years. He knew that if Bakugou found out, it would have only been worse. Just like Izuku’s father, Bakugou probably would have rather turned one of his own explosions on his mark that be with Izuku.
Of course, because fate was cruel, Izuku shared his mothers awful taste in men, and no matter how much he hated soulmates, or how much Bakugou hurt him, that didn’t stop the crush he’d had since he’d first seen him. He joked once, when his mother was cleaning his busted lip, that they both had awful taste in men. With tears in her eyes, she agreed, even mentioning that they should probably stay away from men with fire quirks too.
It was ironic that the first friend Izuku brought home his first year at UA was Todoroki, the half fire and half ice male.
Naturally, his mother had seen their fight and heard about the surgery that had to take place afterwards. When Izuku made a grand gesture to his mother, stating that a male with a fire quirk had come home with him, they both laughed until there were tears in their eyes. Todoroki had been highly confused, but they both brushed it off as an inside joke.
Going to UA, the whole soulmate business was made better and far worse. Better, because of Kirishima, the second boy in Izuku’s life that he thought was attractive beyond all reason. Worse, because Kirishima had the same stupid valknut on his shoulder blade. Better, because Bakugou got a choice then, and could actually be with one of his soulmates. Worse, because it finally made sense why there were three triangles, because there were three people. Better, because Kirishima and Bakugou actually looked really happy together. Worse, because a part of Izuku wanted to be happy with them, and never would be.
It was strange, through their first year, how much Izuku longed to be with his soulmates. A small part of him whispered that it was because he was their fate, but a larger part laughed because he was clearly the only one of them with those feelings.
When Bakugou tried to blow Izuku up on the second day, Kirishima checked on Bakugou, giving Izuku only a small smile. At USJ, neither Bakugou or Kirishima visited him in the hospital. At the training camp, Bakugou told Izuku not to try, as he was being taken by villains. While he was in the hospital, Kirishima came in to talk Izuku into helping him save Bakugou, never once even noticing the casts on Izuku’s arms. Then during the rescue, he knew Bakugou would only come if it was Kirishima who held out a hand.
It was funny. For not being in their relationship, Izuku sure felt his heart breaking a lot. It was nothing he wasn’t used to with Bakugou already. After your soulmate tells you to kill yourself, it’s pretty difficult for much to hurt after that. Kirishima though, those were all new hurts that Izuku had to get used to.
The fight with Bakugou at Ground Beta was the last straw for Izuku. He realized in that moment; he’d been hoping that Bakugou would want him. That Kirishima would want him. He’d told himself his whole life that soulmates were dumb and not real, that they only brought you unhappiness, yet he still followed Bakugou around like a puppy. Still found himself looking at Kirishima’s smile in class, and wondering what it would be like, to be on their level. He still called Bakugou by his childhood nickname, Kacchan, for Pete’s sake!
On the last day of their house arrest after Ground Beta, only minutes before the class would come in, Izuku found himself seeking Bakugou out.
“Can I talk to you, for just a second, I’ll be quick.” Izuku asked, looking at the angry red eyes he’d known his whole life. Bakugou’s scowl hardened.
“What do you want, you shitty nerd.” His voice, though gruff and angry, was far milder than it usually was.
“I wanted to say I’m sorry and that you were right. Not about the pity thing, because I’ve never looked down on you once, I always thought you were beyond amazing, but the following you thing. You’re right. I have been. I’ve always been right behind you, even when you didn’t want me to be, and I’ll stop.” Bakugou’s face was unreadable, but it seemed to have the anger draining out of it. “Sorry, for always being in your way. I’ll leave you alone now. Anyway, that’s all. See you around, Bakugou.” It was the first time Izuku had said Bakugou out loud in so many years, it felt foreign and wrong, and the bewildered look on other’s face only confirmed it’s strangeness, but he didn’t back down.
He didn’t wait for a response before turning away and walking back towards his room. It felt like he was proving what he told Bakugou, he would leave him alone.
He asked Aizawa for a new seat later that night. When prompted for an explanation, Aizawa became the third person who knew his secret. The next day, everyone’s seat were flipped, and Izuku found that he wasn’t always paired off with Bakugou like before.
It was hard, and Izuku still found himself staring at the relationship a part of him desperately wanted to be in, but life moved on.
A few things here and there would still jump out to him, like when Todoroki told Izuku he looked like a ball of lightning raining down from the sky, and Uraraka added that it made sense, since Izuku was clearly an angel from heaven. They did it to tease him, and he responded rightfully in turn by blushing and pushing them both off his bed.
His retaliation didn’t stop the connection of Kirishima harden into rock, like earth, and Bakugou making explosions that could not only bring hell, but turn the ground into hell.
Heaven, Earth, and Hell. That stupid valknut.
Someone finally asked Izuku about it during the beginning of their second year. Izuku was sitting down in the common area with his friends, often referred to as the Dekusquad. Shinsou and Todoroki were sitting on a bench together, the two recently had found out they were soulmates, and were still learning how to act around one another.
“Hey Deku, what’s your soulmate tattoo look like, I’ve never seen it.” Uraraka asked, popping a piece of popcorn into her mouth. Izuku contemplated for a moment about lying and saying he doesn’t have one, but he was with his friends and he knew they wouldn't judge him.
“I don’t show my mark to anyone.” He told her with a shrug. “I don’t really care about all that soulmate stuff. If I fall in love with someone, it’s going to be because of who they are, not a dumb mark on our bodies.” Two sets of red eyes, a joyous laugh, and a determined smirk instantly flashed into Izuku’s mind, but he ignored them. Focusing more on the scandalized looks from those around him.
“I understand that this is your personal business, Midoriya, but this does not only concern you. What if your soulmate is waiting for you and does not share your opinion? Should they not also get a choice in the matter?” Iida asked, hand chopping down with his words. Izuku shook his head.
“They’re already happy, I don’t have to worry about that.” He picked up his textbook, completely moving past his admission of having met said soulmate, or in his case, soulmates. “Let’s get back to the math.”
Fate seemed to enjoy laughing at Izuku because only a week after he made the comment that his soulmates were happy, Kirishima was walking up to his friend group, gaze trained directly on Izuku.
“Midoriya, can I talk to you, privately?” The anger in Kirishima’s voice was so out of character that even before Izuku could answer, Shinsou and Todoroki both stepped in front of him, blocking Kirishima from his view.
As much as Izuku loved all his friends, he couldn’t deny that Todoroki and Shinsou were on another level than everyone else. They felt like his family more than his friends.
“Why don’t you come back when you’ve calmed down, dude.” Shinsou said directing at Kirishima, which only seemed to make him angrier.
“What the hell did I ever do to you!?” Kirishima shouted at Izuku looking around Todoroki to meet his eyes. Izuku quickly stood up, facing his soulmate, and slightly brushing his hands along his friend’s shoulders, to let them know to back down.
“Kirishima, I apologize, but I don’t know what you’re talking about. You haven’t done anything to me.” Izuku told him kindly, trying to calm down the others huffing breath. It was true, Aizawa helped keep Izuku away from both Kirishima and Bakugou nicely, only pairing him with them rarely at most. Izuku stayed away from both at the dorm, and had completely different friends.
“Every time I go to Katsuki’s house and your mother is there with Mitsuki, she won’t talk to us, won’t look as us, she’s literally leaves as soon as we get there. Then after she leaves, Mitsuki is weird as hell around us too! Once when I asked what you were doing for break, your mom told me it wasn’t any of my business! Katsuki just keeps telling me to ignore it, but it’s like he KNOWS what the problem is. So, what the hell is so bad about me that your mom is making my soulmates parents HATE ME!?” Kirishima’s eyes were filling with tears as he screamed, a foot stomping with excess energy, hands bawling up in hardened fists.
Before Izuku could even think about the repercussions of his actions, he was hugging Kirishima tightly. Pulling the taller boy down, one arm around his waist, while the other was around his shoulders. He felt them shaking and soon felt tears soaking into the top of his shoulder.
“You haven’t done anything to me. I’m sorry about my mom. It’s not you. It’s soulmates.” Izuku lied slightly. It was about soulmates, but it was also about Kirishima being Izuku’s soulmate. “I’ll talk to her, tell her to knock it off. I’m sorry she hurt you, she didn’t mean it. Honestly, she’ll probably bring you cookies for the next time you’re at Bakugou’s house.”
He heard Shinsou and Todoroki both behind him, sniffling a giggle. They’d both been fed so many times by his mother, like she was trying to make up for the years she didn’t know them. She told them repeatedly they were all too skinny and pushed more food at them.
The hand around Kirishima’s shoulder slide up slightly, touching the back of his neck. His thumb ghosted along his hair line before he could even stop himself. The hug was innocent, but Izuku couldn’t help the soul deep satisfaction that came along with it. He felt the sudden urge to rub his face on the other like a cat and roll around in his arms for hours, soaking up the intoxicating right feeling. As soon as Kirishima’s hands clench at his waist, pulling him even closer, Izuku let go and pushed back, ending their hug.
There was disappointment written all over sad red eyes, but Izuku couldn’t help them.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have yelled at you.” Kirishima whispered, rubbing his eyes with his shirt sleeve.
“It’s okay. I’m sorry for my mom, and I’m sure Mitsuki doesn’t hate you. We’re all studying, why don’t you sit down with us. Take your mind off stuff.” Izuku gestured to the seat that was open, next to Iida. Kirishima nodded and sat down, hollowly looking at the books in front of him.
“Your mom doesn’t like soulmates either, Deku?” Uraraka asked shyly.
“Either? Midoriya, you don’t like soulmates?” Kirishima looked somewhat betrayed, hands gripping the table, ready to push away.
“Hold on, I feel like there has been some misinterpretation. I don’t dislike people who are with their soulmates, neither does my mom. We both just feel that the concept of finding your perfect half just because of a mark you share, isn’t really applicable to the real world. People are different, people change, people fall in love with others, and fall out of love with soulmates.” Everyone was staring at him with different levels of sadness. He knew his opinion wasn’t very popular, but he didn’t mean to crush an entire room.
“When you met your soulmate, did you feel anything for them?” Uraraka questioned again. Kirishima’s eyes snapped to look over at Izuku.
“Wait, you’ve met your soulmate, and you aren’t together?” Kirishima sounded like his entire world was exploding in his head.
“Yes, I’ve met them. No, we aren’t together.” Izuku felt himself huff a laugh and smile. “Actually, they sort of hate me.” Izuku remembered the growl in Bakugou’s voice, and being pushed away more times than he could remember. He didn’t comment on having two soulmates, afraid that would open up a conversation that he very much didn’t want to have.
“In your soulmates defense, I sort of hated you at first too.” Shinsou joked, jabbing Izuku in the ribs with an elbow.
“I have to concur; I too wasn’t your biggest fan.” Iida smirked.
“I hated everyone, you included.” Todoroki shrugged, reaching over to grab something from the snack bowl.
“I didn’t hate you, Deku!” Uraraka announced happily, making the table laugh.
“Well, at least one person didn’t hate me at first sight.” Izuku lifted a hand, high fiving Uraraka, causing another round of laughter. When the table quieted down, Kirishima let out a long sigh.
“Katsuki and I have been fighting a lot lately. He needs space when I need to be close; he needs me to just get things sometimes, and I don’t. I love him, I know I love him, sometimes, we’re perfect. Other times, it feels like something is missing.” Izuku felt his heart squeeze painfully at Kirishima’s confession.
There was something missing, him.
“Todoroki and I fight sometimes too. I think it’s normal in all relationships.” Shinsou admitted, with Todoroki nodding after him.
“How do you guys work out your fights?” Kirishima questioned, looking hopeful. Todoroki and Shinsou both pointed at Izuku, without hesitation.
“Midoriya makes us sit down to talk, and usually mediates.”
“I can’t have Midoriya do that for us, he hates Katsuki.” Kirishima said deflating down to hang his head. Izuku felt himself straight up in his seat, sending a bewildered look around the table.
“I don’t hate Bakugou. I never have.”
“But last year you guys got in that fight and you started calling him Bakugou instead of that nickname.”
“He hated when I called him Kacchan, so I stopped.”
“But you stopped talking to him.”
“No, I stopped bothering him.”
“But, he said you had ever reason to hate him.”
“I don’t hate him. We just, aren’t friends. That doesn’t mean I hate him.”
“Why does he think you should hate him?” Kirishima’s eyes pressed back into their slightly agitated state, like it was a question he’d tried to get an answer to multiple time, and no one had given it to him.
“Answer him, nerd.” Bakugou’s voice made Izuku jump. He snapped his head to the room entrance and saw Bakugou there, hands shoved deep into his pockets.
Red and green bore into each other for a moment, and the rest of the room dropped away. They had a silent conversation, one that no matter the distance between them, it seemed they could still do.
Tell them.
No.
“We’ve pretty much been pitied against each other since we were four because of our quirks. Rivals, enemies, there are tons of labels people put on us. So after awhile, I’m sure there is a feeling of animosity there. I also think Bakugou hates me.” Izuku never looked away from Bakugou as he lied. Part of it was true, like everything else Izuku says when talking about soulmates.
It was because of their quirks, or lack of quirk. People did put labels on them. Everyone around them did egg it on.
Why didn’t you tell them?
Izuku didnt’t have an answer for that one, so he turned away from the blonde and back to his table. Kirishima and Bakugou made their way out of the room soon after. After a quick chat with his mother, she apologized to Kirishima and Bakugou, making them cookies, just like Izuku knew she would.
After that, it wasn’t unheard of for Kirishima to join their study sessions or work out with Izuku. He’d always pull Izuku into a comforting hug, and Izuku couldn’t bring himself to care when it lingered slightly longer than normal hugs did.
It isn’t until his third year, that one of his friends learned the truth about his soulmate situation. Shinsou and Izuku were interning with Aizawa. Shinsou, because he’s the hero’s protégée and Izuku because he appreciated underground heroes and wanted to improve his stealth.
During a mission, Shinsou and Izuku had the miss fortune of being hit with the villain’s quirk. It was a powder like sustain that could eat through anything it touched, including skin. So Shinsou and Izuku had to shed out of their clothing as fast as they could, before any injuries could occur. Fighting a villain in his boxers with one of his best friends and his teacher was definitely one of those stories he’d tell at parties later on.
After the commotion was over and the villain was detained, Shinsou and Izuku had a good laugh at each other, until purple eyes froze on Izuku hip. It seemed his boxers and pulled down slightly on one side, revealing enough of the soulmate tattoo, that Shinsou knew what it was.
“That’s-” Izuku quickly cut him off.
“It’s called a valknut. I know. What you’re going to say, I know.” He pulled his boxers up, higher than needed, to prevent anyone else from seeing it. Of course, that was the moment Aizawa walked back over to them and noticed Shinsou’s complete mental breakdown.
“What’s his problem?” Aizawa questioned, poking Shinsou in the cheek, seemingly restarting him.
“Oh my God! They’re your soulmates!” Shinsou hissed out in a whisper scream.
“Ah, I see he saw your mark then.” Izuku nodded to Aizawa and Shinsou short circuited once again.
“You know!? He knows!? How- Why- When- WHAT!?”
“You’re only missing who.” Izuku commented blandly.
Of course, after that, Izuku had to pull Shinsou away and explain the story to him, which meant explaining it to the soulmate he couldn’t keep a secret from, even if it killed him.
So, Izuku with his two best friends in his childhood room, stared at the ceiling, as he told them everything from being quirkless at four and his father leaving, to his fight at Ground Beta with Bakugou and the decision to walk away.
“Your soulmate told you to kill yourself.”
“You were given a quirk by All Might.”
“They don’t know you’re their soulmate.”
“That’s why you and your mom don’t like soulmates.”
“Yeah.” Izuku confirmed, continuing to stare at the ceiling. The two bodies that piled on top of his, gave him reassurances of their love and support, and made him feel lighter than he had in years.
That wasn’t to say there weren’t still hard times and times he almost confessed to his soulmates. Especially since Kirishima became one of his regular workout partners.
Bakugou started coming around when they ate and small conversations took place. Of course, there were always other people there, but still a few times Izuku and Bakugou even joked around while they made their food in the dorm kitchen. Movie nights with the Dekusquad turned into a joint Bakusquad and Dekusquad movie night. It was awful because Kirishima fell asleep on Izuku’s shoulder more than once, but Bakugou’s homemade movie snacks were hard to pass up for anything. Thankfully, Shinsou and Todoroki were there to listen to him cry more than once.
Eventually, the year ended, their time at UA came to a close, and the famous class A descended into the world. Izuku himself, had signed to do a year in America, at the same agency All Might worked at. Shinsou was under Aizawa. Todoroki and Bakugou were hired at Endeavor's agency. Kirishima went to Fatgum’s. Uraraka and Iida both went to the Ingenium family agency. Tsu went to an agency back near her family. Then the rest of the class spend out all over Japan.
The year Izuku had in America was amazing. It was hard, and he learned more in that year than the entire time at UA. He made mistakes, he grew, he fought, and for the first time he really started to like himself. He was a good hero. He was happy.
He kept in touch with the Dekusquad, all who were excited for his return, and kept him informed on their lives. Iida found his soulmate; they were already engaged. Uraraka took her parents on a weekend trip up into the country. It wasn’t Hawaii, but it made her happy. Shinsou and Todoroki were engaged, and waiting for Izuku to come back so they’d have their best man. The jury was still out on WHOSE best man he was. They also had a room waiting for him when he returned, telling him that finding a place would be troublesome. Especially since NightEye’s agency, that Mirio had taken over, was waiting for Izuku to return.
What surprised Izuku was that Kirishima and Bakugou kept in contact with him too. Bakugou didn’t say much, usually sending him pictures of him mom, saying she missed him. Pictures of Katsudon that were usually followed up with a middle finger emoji. Once, when Izuku was hurt, Bakugou just sent a text asking if he was still alive. It was small, but it never failed to make Izuku’s heart pound in his chest. Kirishima on the other hand, texted him anything and everything. There were video calls, memes, updates, funny pictures, new gym routines. How Izuku kept a gym buddy while being on the other side of the world, he’d never figure out.
He also found out that Kirishima was a VERY nosey person. Two different times Izuku had been photographed while on dates and Kirishima had blown up his phone for every possible detail as soon as the story came out. It wasn’t very common that pro heroes dated outside of soulmates, so Izuku seemed to be a bit of a gossip column marvel. After his costume had been damaged too many times to count, there was actually a running rumor that Izuku didn’t have a soulmate. The two texts that Izuku had waiting for him as he finished packing up his apartment remind him, that was certainly not the case.
What’s the thing you missed the most here?
What are you going to miss there?
Izuku smiled at his phone, seeing Kirishima’s messages. He’d been asked multiple times about things that he missed, and he honestly had a whole list. His mom, his friends, the food, personal space. America was cramped, people were overly friendly while simultaneously being rude. It was loud, and while the food was delicious in ways that caused Izuku to need larger pants, he missed the clean and crisp flavors of home.
Food. Is my answer to both.
I think I might just be hungry though.
A video chat request came in mere seconds after he sent the messages. Answering, he was greeted with a close up of Kirishima’s face. His usually spiked up hair was down and wet, and Izuku surmised that he’d probably just showered.
“Hey.” Izuku said, waving at the camera. Kirishima brightened up, smiling widely. The camera was then moved to show Bakugou who was standing at the stove cooking.
“I’m jealous. I’m so hungry. All I have here is spaghetti and leftover pizza. I’m really considering walking down to the late-night pierogi bar.” Izuku admitted, glancing over to the clock to make sure they’d still be open. 3:12AM was flashing back at him.
“What’s a pierogi?” Kirishima asked, fully interested.
“It’s like a dumpling, but it’s filled with mashed potatoes and then you can add other things. I usually just at cheese.” Bakugou let out a disgusted noise of the cameras view and Izuku leaned in like he was telling a secret. “Don’t worry, Kiri. I’ll make them for you when I get back and we can get fat together without Bakugou.” Izuku laughed and watched Kirishima’s face turn red, he assumed from holding in his own laughter.
“You need to eat better, you damn nerd. Stuffing mashed potatoes and pasta down your throat every day isn’t good for you. Do you even remember what a vegetable is?” Bakugou griped. The camera was turned back to the aggressive mother-hen blonde who was stirring what looked like spicy Ramen. Izuku being his usual cheeky self tapped lightly on his chin, showing just how cheekily he was thinking about the question.
“Yesterday I had a corndog. It’s made with cornmeal, which comes from corn. Also, potatoes are technically vegetables. So, really the French fries I ate yesterday also counted. I dipped them in ketchup, so I even had my fruits!” Izuku couldn’t help but fall back onto his bed in a heap of giggles as he listened to Kirishima happily try and calm down Bakugou as he ranted about forcing them both to eat properly. It was nice in ways Izuku knew he could get used to.
Izuku rolled onto his side, phone still propped up in his hand, and closed his eyes as he imagined what it would be like to actually be there in person with them. He and Kirishima would be cuddled on the couch while Bakugou cooked. They’d get bored and pester him until he shook his ladle and chased them out of the kitchen. They’d eat their healthy dinner, but then convince him to eat something sweet afterwards.
When he jolted awake several hours later, he found himself smiling at the texts Kirishima and Bakugou had both sent him.
Sleep well, we miss you! Can’t wait for you to come home!
Eat a carrot, fuckface.
Of course, Izuku retaliated by sending Bakugou a picture of him eating a New York style slice of pizza that even folded in half was the size of his head.
A week later and a day early, Izuku was sluggishly exiting his plane, stepping back onto Japan soil for the first time in a year. He hadn’t told anyone about his day early return except his mother, hoping to surprise everyone, and also spend his first day back with her. With only a carry on with him, he stepped towards the pickup area and instantly found his mother's green hair. Both of them naturally broke down into tears instantaneously.
As soon as they were in the car, Izuku pulled out his phone and snapped a photo of him smiling and his mother driving. Both their eyes were red rimmed, and he looked utterly exhausted with heavy eyes and dark circles, but he couldn’t help but love it.
It wasn’t until later that night, as Izuku was sitting outside with a cup of coffee, trying to keep himself awake long enough to adjust his sleep schedule and defeat jetlag, that he pulled out his phone again.
He took another picture, showing the dark night sky in the dark ground and his even more exhausted face. He sent Shinsou and Todoroki both pictures and then gladly excepted their call, chatting for a few minutes and making plans for them to visit his mother’s the next day, if Izuku wasn’t passed out face first somewhere. After they got off the phone, he stared and the few unread messaged Kirishima had sent him throughout the day. Excitement over him coming back, a cool quirk, a cute dog. He hit the call button without even thinking about it.
“Hey nerd.” Bakugou answered after a few rings. “Ei’s still in the shower.” Izuku leaned back, resting his head against the glass door.
“Hey, Bakugou. I actually wanted to talk to both of you anyway, I can wait.”
“I can have Ei call you back when he gets out.” Bakugou offered, sounding slightly awkward. Izuku just laughed at him, taking another drink of coffee.
“So, a few of the heroes I made friends with had this going away party for me, and they gave me a few American must haves. One of them is a classic American cook book. You’ll have to let me make dinner one night. I can actually cook a few things.” Izuku commented, completely ignoring the other’s offer. It was sort of nice to talk to just Bakugou.
“How about you just give the cook book to me. I remember the last time you tried to cook me something. I think I still have nightmares.” Izuku’s heart raced as the teasing tone. He could vaugely remember being around 5 and standing on a chair to try and make noodles. The resulting dish was not something that could be considered food.
“Excuse you, Mr. Master chef. I can cook well enough that I spent a whole year alone and didn’t starve to death.” Izuku giggled and heard Bakugou snort out his own chuckle, making him feel warm all over.
“Damn right I’m a master chef, and don’t you forget it. I’m sure once your tired of cold soba and coffee, you’ll be here every night for dinner anyway.” It was said in his usual gruff and dismissive tone, but that didn’t hide the open invitation. Before Izuku could respond, Kirishima’s voice filtered into the room.
“Who ya talking to Kit-Kat?”
“Deku called. Said he wanted to talk to the both of us. Okay nerd, you’re on speaker.”
“There isn’t anything wrong, right? You should be getting on the plane soon, right?” Kirishima’s nervous voice filtered into the phone, making him sound like a worried mother. Izuku would have felt bad for teasing his friends if he wasn’t so excited to hear their reaction.
“Nope nothings wrong. I’m actually just enjoying the night air. The air is so much clearer in Japan than it is in New York.” Silence filled the line before a Present Mic worth squeal erupted on the other side of the phone.
“Where are you? When did you get in? Why didn’t you tell us?” Kirishima excitedly threw questions at him until Bakugou shushed him.
“He can’t answer if you don’t give him a chance to.”
“I got in this afternoon. I wanted to spend some time with my mom, I’m at her house now.” Izuku smiled as he talked, feeling like a little bit like a love-struck teen on the phone with their crush. Though, as Izuku thought about it, that’s exactly what he was.
“We’ll come over!” Kirishima yelled making the smile on Izuku’s face quickly fall as he sat up with slight panic.
“Come over, now? You want to come over now?” He looked around the balcony expecting someone to jump out in front of him.
“Ei, the nerd just got back. I’m sure he’s tired.” It had to be the reserved tone in Bakugou’s voice, or maybe it was that even over the phone, there was an air of disappointment, but Izuku found his mouth opening without his permission.
“Mom is asleep, but I could meet you for coffee. I don’t really have any clothes here yet, so I’m not sure if I look well enough to be in public, but I could meet you.” He flushed and covered his face in embarrassment when he looked down at his baggy grey sweat pants and sleeveless black shirt. He’d wanted to be comfortable on the plane, and now he was greatly regretting that decision.
In America, no one would have blinked an eye at his outfit, but seeing his soulmates after a year of being away, the outfit seem lackluster at best. Izuku stopped himself, reminding himself that no, they weren’t his soulmates, they were just his friends who unknowingly shared the same tattoo as he did.
An hour later, Izuku was being swept off his feet, quite literally, as Kirishima came up from behind and spun him around. Once he was back on his feet, he was being held tightly against the redhead’s chest in a hug that made Izuku relax in a way he hadn’t since the last time they’d hugged. He peaked around an arm and found Bakugou looking back at him, the smallest hint of a smile on his lips. Izuku pulled away, possessed by the high of Kirishima’s hug and moved over to Bakugou slowly.
It had been years since they’d hugged each other. Probably not since they were 5, before Izuku’s doctor’s appointment. He thread his arms around Bakugou’s waist and leaned into his chest. An arm immediately came around him, ever so lightly resting against his back. Just like his hugs with Kirishima, something deep inside of him clicked into place. He melted into Bakugou who gripped onto him even tighter.
Izuku didn’t except the wall of emotion he didn’t know he’d been carrying to hit him as hard as it did. His hands balled into fists, clinging onto the back of Bakugou’s shirt as he sobbed into his shoulder. Another hand came up and tangled in his hair, clinging to him just as tightly. He looked up and Bakugou’s eyes, looking terrified and wild, filled with his own tears.
“I’m sorry, I don’t know what came over me.” Izuku whispered, pulling away, and trying to dry his tears quickly. “Let’s get a coffee.”
The entire time they sat at the coffee shop, their feet all laid, intertwined under the table. Kirishima sat next to him, an arm slung over his shoulders. Bakugou was leaned forward, his forearm ever so slightly grazing Izuku's. None of them mentioned their inability to stop touching each other. When the moment came for them to leave, Kirishima pulled them into a three-way hug that lasted far longer than Izuku knew if should have. They’d offered to walk him home, but he declined, knowing the fresh air and time by himself would help him get his aching heart back under control.
With each step he reminded himself that a mark on his body meant nothing. Kirishima and Bakugou were happy with each other and Izuku saying anything would not only ruin their friendship but it was also end in disaster. Kirishima would feel obligated and Bakugou and Izuku had only just reached the level were they could hug again. Izuku had made his decision the first time he saw Bakugou’s mark and kept quiet and then again when he saw Kirishima’s. He knew there was no point in trying to change the past.
So, he let life move on. He moved in with his best friends. He quickly became a fan favorite hero and jumped in the rankings. He stood as Shinsou’s best man after a very heated game of rock paper scissors. He was happy. Happier than he even thought he could be.
Bakugou and Kirishima also became staples in his life. Sparring sessions, bi-weekly dinners, the occasional hero event they’d show up at together. The media commented how the feral tempered Ground Zero couldn’t be too bad if sunshine heroes, as the media deemed Kirishima and Izuku, were usually flanking him.
Things weren’t always perfect, Bakugou and Izuku’s argument ended up in fist fights more than once, but always ended with them on the couch, eating pizza, and making playful jabs while Kirishima patched them up. Kirishima and Bakugou had both ended up at Izuku’s door, looking for comfort after they had their own fights.
The most brutal though, was the one time Kirishima and Izuku got into a fight. A movie ended up in an argument, and no matter how many times Bakugou told them both to chill out, the argument blew up. The fight wasn’t physical, no it was emotional and mental warfare. No one had ever known how petty either one of them could be until they turned it on each other.
Communication, completely cut off. Izuku had already been through walking away from someone once, he had practice dealing with longing.
Weekly dinners and any other outings, canceled.
During a water-type villain attack, Izuku strategically moved, letting water wash over Kirishima before taking out the villain. Kirishima’s normally spikey hair was plastered to his face while simultaneously being stuck in every direction. A picture of it had been posted everywhere for a week.
A glitter bomb was delivered to Izuku’s office.
Izuku snuck into Fat Gum’s agency while Kirishima was on patrol and saran wrapped everything in his office.
Embarrassing photos of each other them were leaked to the media.
Their feud lasted 3 weeks, until Bakugou called Izuku to come have lunch at his agency and then quite literally locked Izuku in a room with Kirishima, screaming at them to, ‘get their shit together’. After making up, they retaliated by drawing on his face after he fell asleep on the couch and posted it on both of their social media pages.
The topic of soulmates didn’t get brought up again until a year and half after Izuku moved back. Izuku, as the only top ten hero not with their soulmate, was selected for an underground mission they thought would last around 3 months. Longer missions were always given to those who hadn’t met their soulmate yet, as it was difficult for most people to be away from theirs for extended periods of time. While some heroes didn’t agree with the logic, everyone knew they secretly appreciated it. A small part of Izuku wondered if that was the real reason All Might had been the number one hero for so long.
Izuku sat on Bakugou and Kirishima’s couch, a duffle at his feet, explaining to them that he was going on a mission. He’d already told his mother, Todoroki, and Shinsou. The former tearfully told him to be careful and the latter both offered to join, then made him promise that he’d return. He’d expected something similar from Bakugou and Kirishima, but that’s not what he was met with.
“NO! You can’t go! They can pick someone else.” Kirishima shouted, in a desperate anger. “Why you? They can pick someone else.”
“Can you tell us any details about where you’ll be?” Bakugou asked, ignoring Kirishima’s tempered stomps. Aside from when he’d returned to Japan, it was the calmest Izuku had ever seen him. His eyes, usually a blazing burning red, seemed muted.
“No, I won’t be briefed fully until be leave, which is in about an hour. I’m the only top ten hero who isn’t with their soulmate. You know they don’t like to separate soulmates for that long. It has to be me; I’m literally rumored to not even have a soulmate.” Izuku answered them both, giving a small smile and a dark chuckle. His hand flexed around the duffle handle, knowing he didn’t have much longer until he had to leave.
“But you do, and you’re just going to go off and not eve-”
“I told them.” Izuku cut off Kirishima, anticipating what he was going to say. The blood drained out of his face and Bakugou went still next to him. “I told them I was leaving.”
“You still talk to your soulmate?” Izuku snapped his head up at the utterly betrayed tone from Kirishima. He didn’t understand it, but he wanted to fix it. He wanted to apologize. His heart seized and he instantly looked over to Bakugou to help him, but he only saw lost confused eyes. The same as when he’d walked away from him in their first year.
“I thought they were happy without you.” Bakugou stated, the absence of his usual anger somehow turning the statement hateful in Izuku’s ears. His hand gripped his bag tighter as he stood up from the couch and began to walk towards the door, slowly putting his shoes back on. He ignored the stinging in his eyes and the pain radiating from his chest up into his throat.
“They are happy without me.” Without waiting for either of them to say anything else, he began to walk out. “Be safe both of you.” He called as the door closed. He didn’t turn back, no matter how much he wanted to. He couldn’t.
His soulmates were happy without him.
The mission, like they anticipated, was strenuous and taxing, both mentally and physically. The constant fighting and patching up of injuries left Izuku little time to think about how empty he felt inside. He understood though, why the commission didn’t like to separate soulmates. It was a different world of emotions to be away from them when he’d only just liked them, verses after realizing he was in love with them, but he powered through.
He saved people by the dozens; broke small-time crime rings up as they search for the main branch of the crime syndicate they were after. Three months turned into six months and then finally, the final fight. His team raided the facility at nightfall but it wasn’t long before the sky was lit up with the green streaks of lightning that rolled off Izuku’s body as he fought.
They won, and Izuku was finally allowed to go home and rest his wounds and tired body. The trip home to the one-bedroom apartment he’d gotten after Todoroki and Shinsou’s wedding went by in a forgotten blur. His cell phone laid on his nightstand, exactly where he left it, turned off and waiting for him, but he ignored it. The bed sheets smelled stale and a thin layer of dust coated every surface, but Izuku didn’t care. He slumped face first onto the bed and fell asleep. Each time he’d open his eyes, the pull of exhaustion would close them back.
It took two days for him to get back out of bed, and that was only because his stomach cramped with hunger and his shoulders burned with pain from laying on them too much. His mom was his first call, promising once he was more awake to come and see her. Shinsou and Todoroki were his second call, the pair telling him they were on their way with food, not caring that he was still half asleep. He hovered over Bakugou’s name, but he didn’t hit it.
His soulmates were happy without him.
Shinsou and Todoroki didn’t mind that he mostly laid on them while his eyes closed as they talked. They ate and helped Izuku rewrap his broken ribs and sprained wrist.
“Recovery Girl gave me a pass for three free visits when we graduated. I’m saving them for something good.” Izuku joked and he snuggled further into Shinsou’s lap.
“Did you tell Bakugou and Kirishima you were back?” Todoroki asked when a moment of silence filled the apartment.
“No. I was thinking maybe it’s best if I just stay away from them.”
“I see. So, you haven’t seen the news since you’ve returned.” Izuku opened one eye to look at Todoroki’s face, not understanding what he meant. “Not that your relationship with them is my business, but did something happen before you left?” When Izuku didn’t answer, Shinsou sighed, running a hand through Izuku’s hair.
“You know, it’s not just heroes the commission is concerned about when it comes to separating soulmates. It’s their partners too. Did you ever think about how your mission might affect them?” Izuku sat up, feeling oddly more awake.
“No. I didn’t, because not only do they not know, but we aren’t together. Before I left, Kiri was mad, yelling about how I couldn’t go on the mission, and then it to got soulmates, and I said I told my soulmate, because I DID tell them. Kiri looked upset at the mention that I even talk to my soulmate and then Bakugou said that he thought they were happy without me. I confirmed that, yes, they were, and then I left. We haven’t said anything else to each other since. He’s right though, they are happy without me.” Izuku told them, feeling the need to justify himself for actions that were completely his choice.
“It was pretty bad when you first left. They seemed, really low. Kirishima ended up taking a few weeks off for vacation while Bakugou started overworking himself like crazy.” Izuku did his best to tamper down the urge to run to Kirishima and Bakugou’s and make sure they were okay. He knew he didn’t have to lie to his friends, but he couldn’t help but force a straight face as Todoroki spoke. He didn’t want them to see that it had affected him too. That he worked until he physically couldn’t just to try and outrun the self encompassing emptiness.
“How are they now?” He asked, keeping his voice even.
“Better than before, worse than before you left.”
“Yeah, mom once told me that the feeling of longing never goes away, but it gets more manageable over time.” He remembered the conversation with his mother, it was shortly after Ground Beta, when he told her he walked away and she warned him about how he might feel. Staying away then, then going to America, those times paled in feeling to being on the mission.
“Why not tell them? You guys have been practically inseparable since you came back. I’m pretty sure half our class thinks you’re already dating.” Izuku leaned forward over his knees and drug his hands harshly over his face, trying to wipe away lingering exhaustion.
“I can’t.” The fear of the rejection and watching their happy relationship made the food in Izuku’s stomach feel spoiled. “I’ve thought about moving back to America.” He whispered, not looking at his friends.
“You’re running away.” Shinsou accused, clearly upset. Izuku nodded, unable to deny the accusation.
“Yeah, I know.”
The trio, dropping the topics of soulmates and moved onto happier fronts. They showed Izuku pictures of their two new cats, Iida’s very pregnant wife, told stories about things he’d missed. He told them about his mission, leaving out some of his more brutal fights and instead showed them news scars, laughing each time they chastised him for not taking care of himself. After a few hours, a knock at Izuku’s door cut off their conversation and caused Todoroki to stand up.
“That’s our cue to leave. We’ll hang out again soon. It’s really nice to have you back, Midoriya.” Shinsou gave him a quick hug before following his husband, leaving Izuku to walk behind them, confused on who his new guest was. When Todoroki opened the door, Bakugou and Kirishima were standing there, both looking straight at Izuku.
“Thanks for letting us know, Icyhot.” Bakugou said, not taking his eyes away from Izuku’s panicked ones. The couples switched places, shutting the door behind them before Izuku could even question when Todoroki had apparently messaged them.
“Hey.” Kirishima said after a tension filled moment. He moved closer to Izuku, looking like he might hug him, and Izuku took a step back. Knowing the kind of hugs the other gave, he didn’t think his ribs could take it. The hope in Kirishima’s eyes fell and Izuku instantly realized how it must have looked from the other side.
“My ribs.” He started, stumbling over anything else that tried to come out of his mouth. He resorted to just pulling up his shit, showing the wrappings that covered his torso.
“You’re hurt?” Kirishima’s hand reached out, finger tips lightly touching against bandages. Izuku had to control the sudden wobble of knees and urge to flutter his eyelids closed.
“Deku.” Bakugou’s voice pulled Izuku’s attention and stopped to whine in his throat. “We need to talk.” The finality in his voice left Izuku with no choice but comply. With only a couch, Izuku chose to sit on the floor, with a coffee table between them.
“When did you get back?” Bakugou asked calmly. Izuku couldn’t meet his eyes, instead just starting at the table in front of him.
“Two days ago. Today the first day I was awake or turned my phone back on.”
“Why didn’t you tell us?” Kirishima’s sharpened teeth dug into his bottom lip as he chewed on it nervously. The tension in the air felt heavy on Izuku’s shoulders and he wasn’t really sure how to answer.
“We can’t keep doing this anymore.” Bakugou interrupted, bringing Kirishima and Izuku’s attention to him immediately.
“Kat-” Kirishima was cut off quickly by an angry noise that came out of the blonde.
“We were miserable, Deku. We were miserable with you gone. It felt like we were being torn in half and neither of us could ignore that there is something going on between the three of us. Kirishima has looked at you like hung the fucking stars in the sky since UA. You and I, even with our fucked-up history, we work. The three of us work.” Bakugou’s face was tinted pink and his hands were balled up into fists, a small amount of smoke wafting off of them as he hid the explosions going off.
Izuku sat shocked and unresponsive. The voice inside his head was screaming so many different things at him that he couldn’t keep up.
They felt those things too!
It was only because they were soulmates. It didn’t mean anything.
But there didn’t know they were soulmates.
They DID work.
They missed him like he missed them.
Could he and Bakugou really ignore the past? But, hadn’t they already the last few years? Why did their childhood feel like such a heavier weight to bare when he thought about them being together, verses when they were just friends?
“I’d rather burn off this mark than EVER have to look at it again.”
“I know something you could do for your soulmate and to be a hero, Deku. Pray for a quirk in the next life, and take a swan dive off the roof!”
“I-I can’t.” Izuku stressed out in a forced whisper. He loved them, but he didn’t think he could handle the inevitable rejection that would come when they got bored of him.
“You can’t deny you feel something for us!” Bakugou shouted back at him. Izuku quickly wiped his eyes to clear them of the traitorous tears that covered his cheeks.
“Is it your soulmate?” Izuku and Bakugou both looked over to Kirishima who like Izuku, was crying silently.
Bakugou and Izuku both reached out their hands towards their third, wanting to comfort on instinct, but Izuku stopped his hand, tucking it into his lap and let Bakugou hold onto the redhead.
“It’s complicated.” Izuku tried after a few moments. “I- You don’t understand. It’s- It wouldn’t- It can’t work.”
“Look me in the eyes and tell me you don’t feel something for us. If you do that, we’ll fucking leave and let you go piss away your life without us.” Bakugou’s red eyes met Izuku’s in an unwavering glare that made Izuku feel like he was 5 years old again, answering Bakugou on what the doctor said about his quirk.
“Kacchan.” It had been years since he’d used the nickname, but somehow it slipped from his tongue like he’d never stopped. He glanced from one set of red eyes to the other and felt his heart shattering at how vulnerable Kirishima looked. “I need time to think. You can’t just spring this on me. This is a lot to take in.” He rushed out, trying to find a way of the situation.
“You’ve never thought about being with us, even just once?” Kirishima’s voice was rough with emotion and Izuku couldn’t take it.
Part of him wanted to shout no and then run off to America and never come back, while the other wanted to laugh and tell them that he’d only been thinking about it since Bakugou was 6 and took his shirt off at the park and Kirishima since the second day of UA. Instead, he looked away from them, ashamed at his desire, his thoughts, his past, hurting them, really anything that remotely dealt with soulmates, Izuku felt shame for.
“I just need time to think.”