Chapter Text
"Waaah! Dark Enchantress, why won't you play with meee? It's been mooonths!" Strawberry Crepe whined, exaggerating their suffering.
I headed over to the kid, filled with sympathy. "She's avoiding you again? Same here."
"It's not fair! She only ever pays attention to me for a short while, and she always makes me go deal with mean cookies that oppose her! I hate dealing with those jerk cookies! I hate it!"
That... hurt to hear. Those words were something I felt for a long time, in fact, it was something I felt for as long as I knew Dark Enchantress. The logical side of me knew exactly what she was doing. Dark Enchantress never interacted with us unless she had a mission for us, so she buttered us up with attention, first. It was manipulation, clear as day.
The emotional side of me violently disagreed. It was unfair to expect her to devote more attention to us, when the missions are so important! She's doing her best. There was no way Dark Enchantress didn't care about us...
...right?
"I'm no Dark Enchantress, but I'm willing to play with you, if you want?"
Strawberry Crepe stared at me incredulously, probably planning to kill me just for saying something so stupid and how I should leave if I don't want to get pummeled for being an absolute loser- "Sure! But for every waffle-bot you break, I'll kill a cake pup!"
...How a child could appear so cute yet say something so cruel... Impressive.
"I will be careful with your bots, as long as you promise to not harm the cake pups. They're hated enough by most cookies as it is."
"Okay! Oooh! What if we invite that cookie over there, they look nice!" Crepe asked, pointing at a far away girl. "Games are more fun to play with more members, after all!"
I followed their finger, to see this cookie for myself. She was struggling to hold a lot of stuff, but I could still recognize her. Those blue eyes, the tan skin, the crossbow...
Pastry Cookie.
"What are you doing here?" I growled, slashing at her with my sword.
The foolish gnat simply stepped back to avoid my swipe, expression still neutral, as if I was nothing to her. "Red Velvet. Didn't expect to see you here. Done with the Oven?"
"He's taking a break, playing with me! What are you doing here, Mx... um..."
"Her name is Pastry, not that she's worth any respect. If she had it her way, all of the cakes would be wiped out!"
Another step back. Seems she finally acknowledges the threat I pose. Good. "...A break? If you want to achieve you should give your entire being to see it until it is finished. That is what I am doing, as of now."
"You've. Never taken a break?" The pink haired mechanic gasped, in utter shock. "But you gotta take breaks! It's how you keep your mind engaged! Life can't be all work!"
"For a child, that may be true. However, the Order expects me to complete my task, so I shall. As White Lily was turned into Dark Enchantress, I, Pastry Cookie, will sacrifice my entire being to right this wrong and live up to my namesake."
...What?!
Her voice wasn't that of pride. It was... just empty. And her expression... It wasn't neutral. It was shell-shocked.
What the fuck was the Order thinking?!
"Ha... ha...? That's quite the... dark joke you got there. First of all, Dark Enchantress is the best person ever! I mean sure, she ignores me for months at a time, once for a whole year, but her existence is a good thing! Even if she was a bad person, which she's NOT, you can't just- just sacrifice yourself! Stop trying to spook me!" The tech genius pouted.
"I take my tasks seriously. To become Reverend Mother's successor, every aspect of my identity will be eradicated. All of my stuff will be burned, for this goal. It's... what must be done."
"Okay, look," I sighed. Can't believe I'm doing this... "I still don't like you, at all. But that's just. Incredibly messed up, even for a cake murderer like you. Why are you even considering doing it?!"
She looked at me with the same shock I was feeling, finally snapping out of that infuriatingly unchanging expression. "I... didn't expect you, out of all cookies, to care. However, I have nowhere else to turn. I refuse to seek refuge in the darkness, but this is my only way to stay with the light."
"Maybe we could... just go rogue! Make our own team and fight for what we believe in!"
"...WHAT."
"Okay, okay! I know it's a crazy idea! But but but but! It helps us fix our individual struggles! By doing good things and helping out Cookies, the cakes won't be viewed as badly as before! If Pastry comes with us, she can still keep her moral code, and not get her whole identity erased! And I get to have fun! Win-win-win!"
"I... suppose I might participate in this... odd idea you've come up with...?" Pastry glanced at me, vastly confused.
When did I become the sane one.
"Fine, whatever. I'm only agreeing to this because I don't trust you two to be alone. And Dark Enchantress is a bitch."
"Woo! We're a team, then! Yay!"