The True Lives of the Fabulous BATTs

by NonPlayerChar

Summary:

All it takes for everything to turn out differently, is for one portal door to be set up facing a different direction.

What happens when Luz doesn't meet Eda, and instead stumbles her way into the tender care of the Conformatorium? Who will she end up making friends with, and how different will her time in the Boiling Isles be? And how obvious does the title make the answer to these questions?

Notes:

All it takes for everything to turn out differently, is for one portal door to be set up facing a different direction.

Chapter 1: This is How I Disappear

“Oof!”

The bars slammed to the ground behind Luz as she started to get up from the stone floor that she had been thrown to. The room was plain and bare, a cot in one corner, a toilet in the other, and one tiny, skinny window set in the wall opposite the bars.

“Be quiet and don’t make any trouble!” Came the gruff voice of the creature that had thrown her into the jail cell.

Luz ran to the front of her cell, hands grasping the two bars she stuck her face between. “But why! What did I do?”

The creature, obscured by a pointed mask and puffy grey clothing, had started to walk away but now turned back, eyes narrowed. “What did I just say!” It yelled, slamming its billy club against the bars that had held the young humans fingers moments before. “Be! Quiet!”

She shrank back, and it paused in front of her cell, arms crossed. For a moment, neither made a noise before the thing let out a small snort. “Good!” After this it uncrossed its arms and walked away, leaving Luz to contemplate her new predicament.

Cell walls were not very interesting, as it turned out. Left of the bars, there were 165 near uniform bricks making up a wall. There was no plaster between the bricks, they were so expertly cut that they simply fit together. She could see no places for bugs or little rats to make their way out of the wall for her to name, and the bricks themselves seemed to resist any attempts to scratch them. The only non-uniform thing about the wall was that each brick was, instead of being a perfect rectangular prism, ever so slightly bulging.

It was an incredibly boring piece of construction.

To the right of the bars was another wall, of course. Surprise surprise, it also had 165 uniform bricks, all slightly bulging, expertly cut, and with no gaps.

You’ll never guess how many bricks were set into the floor and ceiling.

By the time this was done, the time had transitioned from somewhere around noon, to something near the sunset. The only reason Luz could tell was because of the last project she had managed to think of, counting the bricks on the far wall. 163, actually, two having been removed to act as a window.

Far, far from the bleak gray walls of her new home, she could see the sun setting on a strange new horizon, highlighting the bones of a giant foot in the distance. This was the world she’d ended up in. Where the sky was purple, the land was a corpse, and you could be thrown in prison if people thought you were weird.

She let her head hit the bars behind her. “Well, at least it can’t get any worse.”

There was a chuckle from the cell next to her, before a harsh but femenine voice responded. “Don’t say that, you haven’t even tried their food yet!”

It was near whispered, but the fake enthusiasm was enough that it almost made Luz giggle. “Can’t be worse than high school lunches.”

Her new companion let out a laugh of their own before responding. “I don’t know what high school is, but trust me, it’s worse.”

The pair shifted into companionable silence for a while, and Luz assumed her fellow prisoner was watching the sun finish setting, same as her.

“So, what did you do to get put in here?”

Unexpected as it was, the other inmate’s voice startled her out of the trance the slowly rising moon had lulled her into. “Uh, I don’t really know. I guess I was asking too many questions?” She really didn’t know. One moment she’d been walking around some streets, attempting to figure out. Well, anything about this location she’d ended up in.

And the next, two large people in bulky gray outfits and pointy masks walked up to her and grabbed her arms, dragging her to her current predicament.

“I was just trying to figure out what’s going on with this place. I mean, I can see giant bones on the horizon, giant bones! How is nobody else freaking out about that?”

The other voice laughed. “What, did you grow up under a rock? You can see the Titans bones from anywhere on the isles, it’s, like, it’s the Titan!”

Luz didn’t respond at first, not really sure what to say. She didn’t grow up under a rock, but she certainly didn’t grow up here. Before she could think of a response, the other person spoke again. Maybe it was because she had been quiet for so long, maybe this had been the speaker's intent the moment they’d spoken.

“Hey, I’m sorry, you shouldn’t make fun of people for not knowing stuff, that’s not cool.” The speaker sighed. “Long as we’re here, what questions do you have?”

She waited for a moment, suspicious. “You aren’t just using this as a way to make fun of me agan for not knowing stuff?”

“I’m not.”

It was another moment before Luz spoke again. “Alright.”

The other voice came back with what seemed like a smile in their words. “Alright! I’m Katya, by the way.”

 

“I’m Luz.”

“Hey!” Came a voice from above. “Suns down, that means Shut Up!”

With any noise apparently audible and severely punished by the guards of this prison after a certain time, both Luz and Katya had to go to sleep. But it didn’t quite take. Luz was staring at the ceiling, thinking about how intense of a day she’d had. Pulled into another world, tossed around a strange market filled with fantastical creatures, thrown into prison for reasons she didn’t understand! How could she sleep at a time like this?

The answer was, apparently, like a log. Sleep came after her like a runaway freight train came at an unfortunate tumbleweed. Fast, heavy, and without mercy. While the day had been incredibly exciting, it had also been incredibly draining, and her teenage body did not have enough fuel to keep her awake for a moment longer.

Her dreams, what few she had, were filled with the oddities she had seen and experienced in an even more confusing mosaic of events than her day had been. Wreathed in the shadows of an exhausted mind, the only thing she remembered from them was the feeling of turning around and finding whatever tent she had walked out the back of not there.

 

 

The morning came too soon, and with it proof of Katya's earlier comment about food. Slid through the bars that covered the front of Luz’s cell was a tin bowl of what looked like soup, but was filled with… well, with things Luz didn’t want to even try to describe. Next to that soup was a thick slice of bread, that was somehow both hard with stale dryness, and far, far too soft to the touch for bread to be.

“Better eat.” Came Katya's voice, muffled by the sounds of her own consumption. “We only get two meals a day in here.”

Luz poked at her food again, and for a moment, she thought that the soup winked at her. “I… I’ll pass.”

A hand appeared, sticking out of the cell next to her and waving in front of her own bars. “If you’re not going to eat it…”

Were her new companions really that desperate for food? She picked up the bowl, and held it out, almost reaching Katya before her stomach let out an enormous gurgle. She eyed the soup bowl again, the unidentifiable parts, the dubiously identifiable, the opaque broth.

“I really don’t want to do this.”

 

Again, the human’s stomach rumbled.

Five minutes later, Luz was gagging. That was perhaps the most disgusting thing she had ever tasted, but her stomach had made its demands persistently known until she finished it, bread, soup, and all.

“I told you, this food sucks.”

“Mhm.” Was all Luz could manage without returning that food to the world outside herself.

“You don’t sound too good, you wanna go lie down?”

“Mhm.”

After letting her stomach settle, and using the facilities in the back of her cell that, thank goodness, came with a curtain, she was back against the wall adjacent to Katyas cell. “That was the worst thing I have ever eaten.”

“Eeyup.”

“I feel like I got punched in the gut.”

“Uh-huh.”

“High school food is so much better.”

“I am unsurprised at your revelation.”

The pair sat there for a moment before Luz spoke again.

“Is dinner any better?”

She knew it wouldn’t be, but the laughter from Katya was more of an answer than she had bargained for, and somehow it was catching, and she ended up laughing herself. Why would dinner be any different at all, in a place like this?

Eventually, the laughter died and Katya answered, still releasing occasional giggles. “No, no, dinner isn’t any better.”

Luz was still giggling herself. It was strange what being stuck in prison for an unspecified amount of time could do to one's sense of humor. “Well, a girl can dream!”

Katya sighed, before asking a question. “So, what do you want to know?”

After those magic words were spoken, the day passed in a barrage of wild questions, Luz rapidly consuming all the information Katya could share about her home, the place Luz had somehow ended up.

This barrage lasted far into the evening, even continuing past the dinner that Luz managed to choke down.

“Why are there giant bones everywhere?”

“Well those are the Titan’s bones.”

“What’s the Titan?”

“An ancient primordial, it died waaaay long ago.”

“Well what killed it?”

“Nobody knows! Some people say it isn’t really dead, just sleeping, but I think that’s kinda bogus. I mean, we have cities in its ribcage. Pretty sure I’d be dead if there were a city in my ribcage.”

“Geez, do you even know how long it’s been dead?”

“At least a couple thousand years, but history before, like, fifty years ago gets pretty murky.”

“Why?”

“That’s when Emperor Belos took over, and ‘saved’ us from the savage ages. He burned a lot of history books, and restricted pretty much everything else.”

“Who’s Emperor Belos? What were the savage ages?”

“Emperor Belos is a jerk, but he’s in charge of everything right now. The savage ages were...” Katya sighed wistfully. “Back when magic wasn’t restricted by covens, and all magic was wild magic. Witches were free.”

Luz paused for a moment before continuing her barrage. “Do you miss them?”

“Hey, I’m only twenty two! How old did you think I was?”

“I, well, um. Older than that?” Secretly, Luz had, perhaps, thought she had found her immortal magic mentor to be.

Katya let out a haughty huff. “Well I’m not, I’m twenty two.”

“Okay, okay… So… do you wish it was still the savage ages?”

Katya again paused, before answering the question. “Sometimes, yeah. I found a good place for me in the Bard Coven, but still. I wish there was more freedom.”

Luz hummed in response.

“Don’t get me wrong, I love making music! It’s fun, it’s energetic, it’s artistic, it’s everything I love about life! But still, sometimes I wish I hadn’t ever gotten this stupid mark.”

Luz cocked her head to the side. “What mark?”

“This one.”

Katya’s arm reached through her bars and bent toward Luz’s cell, offering just enough for Luz to see the dark red harp adorning her wrist.

Luz leaned her head up against the bars to look at the mark more closely. It had incredible detail, each string lovingly represented in such a small space.

“Whoa…”

Eventually, Katya pulled her arm back. “I’m gonna assume you don’t know what those are for, huh?”

Luz shook her head before remembering the wall between her and her friend. “No, not really. It’s a neat tattoo though!”

The snort of derision from her neighboring cell told Luz she was missing something. “Yeah, sure, it looks nice. But it seals away the rest of my magic.”

“The rest?” Wait, had Katya just said…

 

“Yeah, I can only cast bard spells now. I really liked gardening when I was at Glandus, it was nice to be able to go home from that particular hellhole and just mess with plants, you know? But my green thumb was magic reliant, and now it's way harder to get anything to grow.”

While whatever Katya was talking about certainly sounded like an unhappy event, there was something Luz refused to let go glossed over.

“You can do magic!?”

With this question, Katya's tone changed into one of confusion. "I. Yes?"

Even deep in a prison on an alien world, Luz was filled with glee. "Can you teach me?"

"Have you…" Katya's tone was gentle, confused, and worried all at the same time. "Luz, have you never cast a spell before?"

"No, never! I didn't even know magic was real before yesterday!"

Before either could continue, the voice came down from above again. "Lights out, and be quiet!"

 

That night, while Katya lay in her bed, she tried to parse everything Luz didn't know. The names of months, seasons. What the Titan was. Anything about wildlife.

She was obviously inquisitive, and ready to learn, but Katya had to ask herself. How do you grow up and learn none of this? What kind of parent never teaches their kid a single spell? Even her parents, who she did NOT want to think about, thank you very much, had taught her some basic spells when she was little.

She rolled over in the silence that came before sleep, eyeing the wall of her erstwhile mentee. Tomorrow, she will get some answers.

 

Breakfast passed without event, and it was time for Katya to make her move. She knew if she didn't start now, she wouldn't escape from Luz's questioning for the whole day.

"Hey, so, where did you say you were from again?"

The other girl paused, and her response was quiet, subdued. "Gravesfield."

This didn't bode well. She would stop pushing if things got worse. "I've uh, i've never heard of that place, where is it?"

Her new companion let out a deep, heavy breath. Uh oh, here it came. She was raised in a cult or something.

"Yeah, I don't think it's on this planet."

That was not what Katya had been expecting. "Sorry, what?"

"I uh… I don't think I'm from here?"

Katya started to speak before Luz launched into a whirlwind explanation. A book, an owl, a portal door. Stumbling out the back of a temt and being transfixed by everything happening around her, everything she hadn't seen before. Watching a dragon fly through the sky, watching people catch the bug at the bug station, everything was amazing, and new, and distracting!

And then when she'd turned around, the temt had been gone, and two guards were angrily shaking their fists at the sky.

Before she knew it, Luz had been wandering the streets of the city (Bonesborough, she didn't even know it was named Bonesborough) all alone.

Apparently, she'd asked someone the wrong question, or been in the wrong part of town, or made too much of a disturbance, because before she knew it she was here.

"That's uh. Wow." Katya really didn't know how to respond.

"Yeah." The despondent voice that drifted back through the bars told her she had to do something though.

She cleared her throat, intent on figuring out how to distract the girl. "So, you wanted to learn magic right? What are you?"

"What?"

"Well I'm a witch, but if you're not even from the isles you might do magic differently."

"I can't just… become a witch?"

She had to hold herself back from a small laugh. She was trying to comfort this girl, not make fun of her. "Uh, no, no you can't."

"Well why not?" Oh good, the sadness had turned more into confusion.

"Well, uh. I mean. Can your species turn into other species? Maybe you can, I don't know."

"Witches are a species!?"

"I mean… yeah? What else would we be?" What else could they be, really?

"Oh, well, where I come from… no, no tangents, that's not important! I'm a human, do you have any idea how a human could do magic?"

Oh no. "Oh, well, uh."

Luz was waiting patiently. It broke Katya's heart to tell her this, but she didn’t want to lie to her friend. .

"Humans… can't."

"Can't what?" Oh Titan, she was going to make Katya say it, wasn't she.

"Humans can't do magic."

Luz let out a sound of indignation before returning to her conversation with Katya. "What? Like at all?"

"I mean, as far as I know, yeah. But hey, witches don't have gills."

"Wh, why would that matter?"

"Because… humans… do?"

Silence reigned.

"No they don't."

"Yes they do!"

"I'm a human, and I don't have gills!"

"Oh next you're gonna tell me you don't have a venom sack."

"I don't!"

"Then how do you defend yourself from bear attacks!?"

"I don't know, guns?"

"How would biceps help against a bear!?

Chapter 2: Disenchanted

Notes:

Chapter two is here! Huge thanks to visionaryScribe and blue_flowers, you both helped me a ton with this chapter, and every other part of this I've written XD. For real, these two are the MVPs.

“You can’t be serious.”

An indignant scoff came from the cell adjacent to the Noceda. “Hey, I like what I like! What’s wrong with that?”

“No, no, I mean… How did that get you arrested?”

“You were arrested for asking questions, how do you think?”

“Okay fair, but what I mean is more how did they find out? I was out in public, you were just creating!”

“Well I did post to penstagram.”

“What’s penstagram?”

“It’s kind of like… you remember how you explained the intraweb?”

“Internet, and yes.”

“It’s like that, we can use scrolls to like. Share a bunch of images and text messages at once on a place other people can visit.”

No way. No way. It couldn't be the same, could it?

“Most people just use it to follow celebrities though.”

It was!

Luz let out an amused groan before responding. “I can’t believe you guys have your own version of Instagram.”

“Instagram?”

“Pretty much exactly what you just described, except we use phones not scrolls, and the internet, not the aetherweave.”

There was a pause in their whispered conversation as a guard walked by. They may have made too much noise the previous days, even while trying to whisper, causing the warden and all of his subordinates to walk the halls with more frequency, and enforce the ‘rules’ (which Katya had informed Luz mostly consisted of whatever random whims Warden Wrath was feeling those days).

It was always good to let the guards be far away before you spoke again. Luz had sore fingers from earlier the very same day when she learned this lesson.

They waited a few minutes for the guard to pass, until they could see him walking the circular path that led all the way to the base of the conformatorium on the other side of the building, still continuing downward.

Luz leaned a little closer to the corner of the wall adjacent to Katya's cell and the bars before she whispered again. “So you posted it on penstagram and they arrested you for it?”

“Yeah, why? What about that isn’t making sense?”

“Well…” Luz paused. “Do you have a lot of followers?”

The witch she was talking to paused for a moment before answering.. “Uh, no, not really. Only my mentor, and two friends.”

“Did any of them repost it, or reblog it or whatever?”

The witch was silent before she gasped. “Oh no way.”

“IIII’m gonna take that as a no. Did you, perhaps, tag this in any way?”

Katya was stifling a chuckle as Luz continued.

“So, if they didn’t repost it, and they’re your only followers, and you taaaagged it.”

Katya was releasing a full belly laugh now, only barely held back by what Luz assumed was a hand firmly clamped over her mouth. She was on the verge of laughing too, and she knew what she was about to say would drive her over the edge.

“Whoever reported you had to specifically be searching for food fanfiction Katya. And if nobody reported you, then either one of the guards, or Warden Wrath was looking for food fanfiction on Penstagram.”

With this, Luz lost it. No longer able to control her own reactions to the situation, she too was laying on the ground laughing, one arm over her mouth in an attempt to make sure she wasn’t loud enough for the guard to get annoyed.

She failed.

For the first time, Luz experienced the tender mercies of Warden Wrath.

 

It was the muffled grunting sound that distracted Katya from her sleep. After Luz had been taken to the upper level by Warden Wrath, she hadn’t been giving more than one word responses to Katya for a few days. Not up for much of anything it seemed, so hearing that noise was worrying.

The muffled grunting came again, rousing Katya from her reminiscing. Yup, that was definitely coming from Luz’s cell.

She cautiously approached the bars and looked around. No guards on their level, and she couldn’t see any further up, or further down. At this time of night they would probably all be asleep, but it was always better to check.

Once more, the sound came, and this time she heard a barely audible “Dangit.” follow. That was definitely Luz talking, and she didn’t sound hurt at least.

Katya pushed her head through her bars as far as she could, trying to get a better look. “Luz, what’s going on?”

“Uh, nothing?”

Dang, this kid wouldn’t last a day in the isles. That was the most pathetic attempt at a lie Katya had heard since she was in diapers. She’d have to fix that when they got out. Someone had to teach Luz how to lie properly, and apparently that was going to fall to her.

But at least she was talking again.

Employing tactics she has learned from her mentor, she waited. Nobody could hold onto a lie if you just waited after they told it. Well, she couldn’t. And neither could Amber or Derwin. Well, they could if it was anybody but their mentor waiting. Something about them just made it impossible to not tell the truth, and she hoped she could emulate that aura with Luz.

As luck would have it, she could.

Luz hemmed and hawed, but eventually caved to the power of the sound of disbelieving quiet. Katya would have to thank her mentor when she got out. If she got out.

“I’m…I’m trying to make a spell circle?”

“What? Why?”

“Well, maybe you were wrong about humans not being able to do magic? In The Good Witch Azura, magic comes from the heart, so I just figured...I don’t know, if I believed hard enough I could make it happen?”

“Well I mean, it doesn’t directly come from the heart, but close.”

Luz gasped before responding. “Is it the soul? The subconscious? Oooh, do I have to meditate? I can meditate!”

Katya smiled, before she noticed the sound of booted feet coming down the walkway. “Shh, pretend to be asleep!”

The pair both rushed back to their cots and climbed into them, feigning sleep as a lantern passed them by, footsteps echoing through the whole of the conformatorium. Eventually, the footsteps made their way back up the spiral and the guards door closed behind them, leaving the prison in darkness once more.

Katya edged forward slowly, quietly, not making any noise before she let out the quietest whisper she thought Luz would still be able to hear. “Luz, I already told you, Humans can’t do magic. If you keep making noise at night, Warden Wrath is gonna come again.” Katya shivered at the memory.

The frightened whine that came back through the bars could have unfrozen the heart of the world's most jaded bureaucrat. The voice that followed was far quieter than Luz’s voice should be, even when she was whispering. She was too excited for the muffled sound that came through. “I don’t want to be defenseless if they take me again... Why can’t I learn?”

How the pair hadn’t covered this in the previous day's conversations, Katya didn’t know. Well, she did. The conversation about where the spiders that Griffins breathed came from, the origins of different spider types, if spiders existed outside of griffin breath, and the various rabbit holes about the beasts of the Boiling Isles they’d gone down had taken up hours.

“Magic comes from the bile sac. It's an organ next to the heart, everyone who can do magic has one. Witches, demons, wild beasts. If something can do magic, it comes from a bile sac.” There was no other source, as far as Katya knew. And really, if there was one? It would have been discovered by now.

“Oh.”

She really wished she could give Luz a hug right now. “I’m sorry Luz.”

“It’s not your fault, it’s just...” The sound of the girl shifting indicated a slump in her posture, if Katya was interpreting it right. “I’m scared.” Her voice was filled with tears. “I thought that maybe if I could make something positive come of this I would be less scared. Learning magic would have done it. I could have been like my heroes in all my books, Azura, Hecate, Harriet. All powerful witches, and I’m just…” The human girl sighed. “I’m just a human.”

There wasn’t much to be said to that, not when there was no real solution. All Katya could do was reach a hand through the bars and hold onto Luz’s own, giving her some measure of comfort while she silently cried.

 

“Your mom sounds super nice.”

“Yeah.” Luz smiled. “She was my best friend.”

“Really? Nobody better?”

Luz smiled. It was nice to get to brag about her mama. “Nope, not one person. She’s the best. She makes the best food I’ve ever tasted. She tries so hard to make sure I have what I need to be a success. She really loves me, and I love her too. She’s my mama, you know?”

Her neighbor let out a ‘pffft’. “You a mama's girl, kid?”

“Hey, I’m fourteen!”

“You are a baby. A little small child who is small.”

“I’m in high school!”

At this, Katya's voice changed into the one Luz had grown to associate with a smirk. “You’re not gonna convince me you aren’t a kid, squirt.”

Finally at a loss for words, all Luz could do was repeat what she’d just heard. “Squirt?”

“What else am I supposed to call you? Shrimp? Shortie? Short stop?”

She was lucky that there was a wall between her and Katya, because if there wasn’t, the witch would have seen the intense blush covering Luz’s face. And that embarrassment would have made it that much worse. “You said you weren’t going to make fun of me!”

“Bup bup bup, this is teasing, it’s different!”

Luz made an exasperated noise. “How is it different!?”

“Is this another human realm, demon realm thing?”

“I don’t know, is it?”

Something in Katya’s cell shifted, and her voice came drifting through again. “Well, here, you make fun of people if you’re a jerk. You only tease your friends.”

Luz raised one eyebrow, even though Katya wouldn’t be able to see it. “That still doesn’t explain how it’s at all different.” she mumbled.

There was silence from Katya’s cell for a moment before her voice came through the bars again. “It’s. I guess it’s about intent? Like… making fun of people, you’re trying to make them feel bad, right?”

“Yeah…”

“But teasing people is more like trying to make them feel included. Like… friendly insults. You might make someone a little offended, but you’re more trying to make them feel happy and known and stuff. Here, you try.”

“What?”

"Try teasing me."

"I'm not gonna tease you."

"Come on, tease me!"

Luz's voice changed into something not quite so sure of herself. "I really don't want to."

Katya's voice got just a little softer as she responded. "Luz, don't worry about it, you're not going to hurt my feelings. I have a pretty thick skin."

She shuffled backwards from the bars, just enough to curl up to herself. She put her hood over her head and pulled the drawstrings tight. "I just… don't feel comfortable with that right now."

"Okay… okay… you don't have to if you don't want to."

Her voice went back to her new friend more quietly than she would have wanted. "Thank you."

For a small amount of time, neither of them made a sound.

"Hey Luz?"

"Yeah?"

"Did you…did you get bullied a lot?"

She didn’t want to answer. She didn’t want to go into details, to admit that the reason her mama was her best friend was that she didn’t have anyone else, but she didn’t want to lie to Katya. "Yeah."

While she waited for a response, she worried it would be what she expected. That the older girl would figure out she was a loser and stop talking to her. Or worse, keep talking to her but not in a way anyone wanted. That her friend would turn into her newest bully.

"Sorry I tried to get you to tease me."

It was a relief to be wrong, but silent tears still came.

"It's okay."

“Hey,” Came a scared, somewhat nasally voice from another cell, “you two need to be quiet or else the Warden’s gonna punish all of us! It’s after dark!”

Again, Luz noticed that Katya had held her hand out.

Again, Luz took hold of the small comfort it provided for her.

 

The morning sun shone through the window of her cell as she did another push up, staring at the stone beneath her face as she pushed herself skyward once more. Working out sucked, but besides talking to Luz, it wasn’t like there was anything else to do.

“Why are you working out again?”

Down, up. “Because, when we,” down, up, “get out of here,” down, up, “I don’t want,” down, up, “to just,” down, up, “be caught,” down, up, “again!”

She collapsed to the ground with a thump, breathing hard. Maybe she should have listened to Raine and started working out a while ago, but it was so incredibly boring! Even though it was boring, ten push-ups before exhaustion when she had seen her mentor do nearly fifty without breaking a sweat? She felt pathetic.

The voice that came in response was one filled with resignation. “When are they going to let us go?”

Answering a question like this was impossible. She didn’t know, not really. She wanted to say it would be soon, that their release could come any day, but it seemed unlikely that the Warden would release them any time in the near future. As far as she knew, nobody ever left the conformatorium in less than a year, and you didn’t get to leave until you were ‘normal’ enough for Warden Wrath. She doubted Luz would ever fit that description, and she knew she wouldn’t.

That said, she had a sneaking suspicion that if the warden didn’t release them soon, another group would.

But she couldn’t know when that other group would arrive, if they ever did. And she wasn’t going to lie to this kid. She’d been lied to enough when she was Luz’s age, she knew how it felt when done by an adult she trusted.

She huffed a breath out of her nose while her friend waited silently for an answer.

“Have I ever told you about my friends?”

“What?” The confusion that filled Luz’s voice was laced with some underlying emotion that Katya didn’t have a name for, something that told the older witch that her younger human friend probably knew exactly what she was doing.

“Have I told you about my friends and my mentor? Amber, Derwin, and Raine?”

“No.” While Luz’s voice was quieter this time, there was something akin to relief at the distraction. At least, that’s what Katya hoped it was.

How could she phrase this without giving away their real goals? “They’re all bards, like me, and we have kind of a troupe together.”

As she expected, new information worked to distract Luz. There was a small scrambling from the neighboring cell as the human got closer to the corner she sat in when the pair talked. “What do they play? Wait, what do you play?”

Katya smiled, it was already working. And as always, cheering up the tiny human kid cheered her up too. “I never told you what I play?”

The groan that came from the adjacent cell was one she recognized well by now. Even in only a week of knowing each other, Luz’s pleas to know whatever was being dangled in front of her were a well known phenomenon. “Katyaaaaaaa.”

Her smile turned into a slug eating grin. “Are you suuuure I never told you?” She tapped one finger on her chin. Even if Luz couldn’t see her, a little flair never hurt.

“Yes I’m suuuure!” Came the sarcastic response.

“Positive?”

“Katyaaaa, pleeeeeaaaase!”

Well, she probably shouldn’t draw it out much longer. “I play the most important instrument in any band.” she said, adopting a haughty tone and pose, turning her nose into the air and taking on an exaggerated frown. “One only played by skilled masters of bardcraft, something only true prodigies can even hope to understand.”

Luz released an excited “Mhm?”

Katya smiled. She was the best… Whatever she was to this kid.

Something to unpack later.

“I play,” she paused, building dramatic tension. “The tambourine!”

“Shhhh!!!” Came the sound of multiple other prisoners nearby, hoping to stave off the attention of the guards a little longer.

“Sorry, sorry.” Katya whispered. She continued the whispering into her repetition. “I play the tambourine.”

The silence that came from Luz’s cell seemed almost judgemental. “Isn’t that just a ring with cymbals on it?”

Katya scoffed in mock offense. “A ring with cymbals? Oh, simply a ring with cymbals, I’m wounded Luz! Wounded and stabbed in my heart!”

Luz started giggling at her continued antics.

“A ring with cymbals? It’s as though you know not their true name of zills! And even then, why, what about the drumhead? The leather carefully stretched over the frame?”

Stifling the giggles before responding, Luz started to reply. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, you just built it up so much-”

“As well I should!” She had her hands on her hips now, really getting into character. “A noble instrument, insulted as such!” Letting her character drop finally, she continued. “But yeah, I play the tambourine, it’s fun.”

Her neighbor released an mhm before continuing her questioning. “What about your friends?”

“Amber plays the recorder, Derwin plays the bassoon, and Raine plays the violin. They’re all really good, excellent bards. I’m lucky to get to work with them.”

“How did you all meet?”

“Well, it all started when I joined the bard coven…”

Notes:

I promise. Next chapter, we will be leaving the conformatorium. One way or another...
Remember to comment! The more comments I get the more I can write, hope you all have great Saturdays!

Chapter 3: Welcome to the Red Parade

Notes:

I figured you all deserved a double update.

‘Ka-chunk’

“Wha-?”

‘Click-k’

“Katya?”

‘Crrreeeeeaaaak’

The human finally opened her eyes, rubbing the sleep from them. The prison was cold at night, so she pulled her hood up to ward off the freezing of her ears. As her blurry sleeping vision cleared, she saw the side of her cell normally covered with bars empty of them.

Surprise finished waking her, and Luz shot out of bed. The cell was open. The cell was open! She creeped forward slowly. Even in only one week of prison, she had learned to be suspicious. Could this be the guards doing, she didn’t know, something to mess with her?

As she reached the front of her cell, a sight she never expected to see greeted her. Every cell was open, and while not all denizens of the conformatorium were awake, those who were seemed to be in a similar position as her.

To her left she saw a green guy, a demon, apparently. Katya’s world was weird. He had five eye sockets (but only three currently filled).

Beyond him was a strange little creature that looked like. Well, a white nose with eyes, arms and legs, and a fluffy shock of red hair.

To her right, there was nobody.

Looking down, she saw many prisoners slowly, carefully tiptoeing their way down the spiral to the open exit. Her compatriots, those who were awake at least, were doing the same.

This wasn’t a chance she could afford to waste. But she also wasn’t going to abandon her friend.

She creeped into Katya’s cell, making out the form of the witch in her bed. She looked shorter than Luz had expected.

Luz shook her shoulder, and received only a murmur in return and a smacking of her hand.

She shook again. “Katya, wake up.”

“Mrfphl.” The witch rolled over and tugged her thin blanket tighter over her shoulder.

Luz gritted her teeth and glanced out the prison door. Someone was making their way down from where the guards were normally stationed, and while they didn’t look like a guard, Luz wasn’t willing to risk it.

She shook harder, and spoke a little louder. “Katya, we have to go, come on.”

“Five more mins...” the witch mumbled as she flapped a hand around uselessly.

Glancing back out the cell, Luz could see the figure getting closer.

The rest of the prisoners were halfway down the spiral, at least those that had woken up, and she was still near the top. The figure she could still see moving would be on them any moment. She didn’t have any other options, and she refused to leave Katya. If they had to run, so be it.

“KATYA!” she shouted.

The witch’s eyes shot open and in the silence that filled the prison, you could hear a pin drop.

You could also, apparently, hear a door slammed open by an angry warden. “What is going on!?”

At this the silence ended, and those prisoners who had managed to leave their cells started screaming and pushing over and through one another to exit the front gates.

“Come on, let’s go!” she yelled, grabbing Katya’s hand and dragging the half asleep witch into a leap through the front of her cell just as the warden flipped the switch to re-close them.

The older girl’s eyes were still blinking open as she glanced around the walkway the pair had landed on. “Luz? What’s happening?” Her words came out as a mumble, the mumble of someone still half asleep.

Not replying, Luz yanked Katya to her feet and pulled her into a run. They didn’t have time, they didn’t have time!

Behind them was an angry warden and that same shadowy figure, who Luz could now see was wearing some kind of mask with big ears. Well, this was another world, that might just be the green haired things face.

In front of them was freedom, the gates of the conformatorium still sitting wide open.

Their feet hit the stone floor of the conformatorium faster and faster as they heard the booming footsteps of the warden catching up. “You think you’ll escape? You think escaping will even be worth it!? You freaks belong in a place like this, locked up where you can’t trouble the rest of the world!”

With his lecture out of the way, the warden cast his hand across the walkway in a streak of gray flesh, pulling himself down a level in one move. He did it again, crossing from one side to the other with increasing speed as he closed the gap between himself and the pair of prisoners doing their best to become a pair of escapees.

Katya skidded to a stop. “Luz, you run, I’ll hold him off!”

Even with the push that was given to her, Luz didn’t move forward, continuing to tug on the witch's arm. “No! I’m not leaving you, come on! We can make it!”

The bard looked back to Luz and gave her a soft smile. “Nah, I don’t think we can squirt. When you get out, try to find Raine Whispers, alright? Tell them I sent you, they’ll help you out. Now go!”

With that, Katya gave Luz a shove that sent her stumbling. She turned to see Katya making a vibrant purple circle in front of her, and suddenly there in her hands was a tambourine. She turned to face the warden as Luz watched in horror, her friend dwarfed by the gargantuan gray goliath. “You might catch me Wrath, but you won’t catch everyone!” she said with a smile as she began to perform.

The warden's unusual method of transport had brought him within a hair's breadth of Katya, but the moment she started shaking her tambourine a pinkish-red light flowed from her instrument to fill the space around her, and the warden's legs started walking him back up the stairs.

For a moment, Luz allowed herself to hope. It was working, Katya was walking the warden all the way back to the top of the spiral, they could escape, they could get away!

That hope was dashed just a moment later.

Warden Wrath’s hands morphed into the heads of pickaxes, and he drove them into the walkway in front of him, stopping his legs from taking him any further toward the top.

“You think this will stop me?!” He started dragging himself toward Katya as Luz watched. “You think some measly bard spells will let you escape!?”

His pace increased, hands coming down faster and faster, driving the spikes he had formed into the ground closer and closer to Katya as the witch, Luz’s only friend outside of her mama, had her confident smile turned into something more akin to horror.

“You think-”

Three notes rang out into the conformatorium from a shadowy alcove just next to the warden. Only three notes.

The moment those notes reached the warden's ears, or, well, Luz presumed he had ears. The moment the warden presumably heard the notes, he fell over, unmoving. The only hint that he was alive at all wasthe gentle rise and fall of his chest.

While Katya and Luz stared at this monster, asleep only feet away from one of them, the figure Luz had seen earlier stepped out from the alcove. “Yes, actually.” They said.

Luz was fully prepared to grab Katya and book it from whoever this terrifying individual was, but fate had other plans.

“Raine!” Katya yelled, launching herself to hug the person, who was… blushing? They were blushing? “You came!”

The mysterious, terrifying, powerful figure continued to blush and then raised a hand to awkwardly rub the back of their head. They then began to…to stutter?

“Y-yes, well, I, that is, we couldn’t just…”

Another voice piped up from below, in the middle of the circle at the base of the conformatorium. “We couldn’t just leave you in here Katya, now come on! Before he wakes up or any other guards arrive!”

The excitement finally proved too much for Luz and she began to make a high pitched excited noise. Her friend was part of a cool gang! Magical rebels against an unfair system, this was amazing!

Unfortunately, her squealing drew the attention of her apparent rescuers. She felt something hard poke her in the back. “Hey boss! We have a witness, you want me to, you know, take care of her?”

Luz gulped as the blood drained from her face. She had escaped prison just to be killed by cool magical rebels who might actually not be that cool if they were going to murder her!

Her process of making peace with the fact that she’d never even gotten her first kiss was interrupted by twin yells. Well, they weren’t exactly twin. And only one was a yell.

The first involved Raine jumped toward the pair, yelling. “No! No Amber, we’re not going to kill the witnesses, what, why would we do that?”

Katya on the other hand, just pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed. With her eyes still closed, she began to speak. “No, Amber, we’re not killing Luz.”

“Aww.” Came a voice from behind her. “I never get to kill anyone.”

As the figure that had been holding what was apparently a recorder to Luz’s back came forward, she finally got a chance to process who it was who threatened her life. A purple skinned, white haired girl came around her, kicking at the floor in disappointment.

Katya stepped forward, putting hand on Luz’s shoulder. “You’ll get to kill someone eventually, just not Luz.”

The voice that had previously popped up from lower in the conformatorium popped up again, this time associated with a black haired boy with dark skin. “This is all well and good, and it was great to meet you Luz, but we really do have to be going before the Warden wakes, sooo…See you around?”

Oh great. She was going to be alone again, in an alien world, knowing nothing, with nowhere to sleep, nothing to eat, and no way home. Hooray.

The hand resting on her shoulder tightened. “Luz is coming with us.”

What?

Raine looked over at the pair of them. “Katya, I know you trust her but we need to go through the vetting process and-”

A deep groan filled the room. All five of them looked around before realizing it was coming from the Warden, and one of his arms was slowly reaching down, pushing himself toward his feet.

The five of them were running before any had said a word, and through the huffing and puffing, Katya only managed to get out a few words. “Just trust me on this, I’ll explain when we get back to the base, alright?”

 

“Wow…”

The base that this group took Luz back to was amazing. Covered in pillows, a red theme to match all of their outfits, lit with candles and other lights to provide a warm happy glow…she’d never been here before and it felt like home.

A hand fell over her shoulders. “Yeah, I know, I did an amazing job.” Looking to her right there was the smiling face of Amber, the one who had wanted to kill her earlier.

Still though, Luz had to admit she had an eye for interior design. “You set this all up? It looks amazing!”

“Haha, yup,” she replied, thumbing her nose, “aaaaaaaall me.”

This was met with a light tap to the back of her head by Derwin. As he stepped through the entrance Amber and Luz were just inside, he clarified. “She said ‘you need more cushions.’ That was it.”

“Hey!” Amber yelped with an indignant scoff, hands turning to fists at the end of ramrod straight arms held to her sides. “I also decided where the cushions should go!”

The pair continued to argue as Luz absorbed more of their hideout. It’s red theme did cover the pillows Amber claimed credit for, but more than those soft inviting sirens of feathers covered the interior.

The ceiling was spanned by red fabrics strung back and forth to block the stone she occasionally glanced above. Underneath, there were three main areas.

First, there was the place with all the pillows. Directly across from the entrance, set into the corner of the far wall and the one to the right was a square rug covering the ground, made in dark reds and soft yellows. Surrounding the rug was a set of six rough-hewn wooden chairs that looked like they would have been uncomfortable if not for the pillows thrown wildly across them, and the rug in front of them. A place to sit, chat, and relax after secret masked rebel spy missions, of course.

To the left of this was a plain table, surrounded by benches. It had maps, papers, and a few items strewn about on top of it. There were still some mugs of something sitting on top of it, and Luz could barely make out a blueprint of the conformatorium sitting atop the rest of the papers. Oh she was really in cool rebel territory now! A mission planning table!

She was barely holding in her excitement when she got to the last part of the base. Across from the table, on the wall next to the door was a cork board filled with pictures of people, pictures of places, notes, and varying colors of string. A conspiracy board!? They were keeping track of so much!

The sound of the door closing and lock clicking didn’t quite snap her out of her reverie, but the feeling of a hand on her gaped open chin pushing her mouth back closed did. “Yeah, we’re pretty amazing, but you don’t want to lose your jaw, right?”

Turning to the witch who she’d spent the last week talking to, Luz could almost feel the stars in her eyes. “Why didn’t you tell me you were part of a cool secret rebel group!”

Katya winced as her ears flicked back and forth for a moment. “Okay, ow, loud.” Before she could apologize, Katya continued. “And I didn’t tell you because you would have reacted like this.”

“Like what!?”

The look Katya gave her was answer enough.

Luz laughed nervously as she clasped her hands behind her back. “Okay, it uh, might have been a good plan to not tell me while we were in the conformatorium.”

“That’s what I thought.”

“Speaking of,” came the voice Luz could now recognize as Raine, “we are back at base, are you willing to explain now, Katya?”

They stood there with their arms crossed and their mask finally off their face, revealing an older, much older, witch with big round glasses. Their face was in a frown, but not an angry one, just a serious one. One that demanded a reason for this sudden intrusion into their plans.

Katya reached for the back of Luz’s hood and then turned to her. “Can I show them?”

There was a pause as Luz looked around. All three of Katya’s friends were looking at the pair of them expectantly. She took a deep breath in, and then let it out. “If you trust them, I trust them. You can show them.”

Katya smiled, and pulled off Luz’s hood.

“I don’t- oh.” The teal haired witch’s eyes widened. “Oh my.”

With her hood off, the whole of the group could see Luz’s rounded ears. She raised her arms to give a weak pair of jazz hands. “Tah-dah.”

Amber and Derwin both had their mouths wide open in amazement, Raine’s eyes stayed wide, and Luz had started to fidget under the scrutiny.

“So as you can see,” said Katya, stepping in front of her, “She had to join us.”

Raine nodded as they continued to look at her in amazement. “How did you even get here?” The question was whispered, almost non-existent, but Luz still heard it.

“I don’t know.” She looked down, away from the inquiring eyes of Katya's friends. “I was…I chased a bird through a door, and then I was here, and then when I turned around the door was gone.” She hadn’t noticed the tears starting to collect under her eyes. “And then nobody would explain anything to me, and because I kept asking questions they threw me in that place.” The tears had started to flow faster now. “And I don’t know how to get home and I just miss mi mama.”

“Hey, hey, it’s gonna be okay.” The hand that had moved from Luz’s hood to her shoulder moved again, and in a moment, Katya was giving her a hug. “This is why I brought you here, Raine is the smartest witch I know.”

She looked up at her friend, sniffling and wiping tears from her eyes. “Really?”

Her prison pal gave her a confident smile. “Really. They helped me when I had nothing, they helped Amber and Derwin out of similar situations too. We can find a place for you here.”

The cautious smile Luz had been growing turned into a frown.

“Why can’t I just go home?”

The four witches in the room flinched before Raine gently moved Katya aside. “Well Luz, portal magic is, it's incredibly rare, and dangerous. The Emperor is trying to build a portal to the human realm, and while we don’t know his goals there, he’s the most powerful witch on the boiling isles, despite the claims of others.” Raine shook their head.

“Even he’s having trouble. He’s been working on it for nearly twenty five years, possibly longer and come up with nothing. We can try to find who’s portal you came through, but outside of that…” They trailed off, seemingly at a loss for words.

What she said next was barely a whisper.

“I’m never going to see mi mama again.”

There was no reassurance from the witches. No-one saying yes you will. No-one saying we’ll find a way. No-one telling her she was wrong.

“I’m sorry.”

It wasn’t Katya who had spoken, but Raine. The leader who Luz had just met earlier that day, their eyes filled with compassion as they knelt down to meet her eyes. When had she ended up sitting on the floor?

“The Boiling Isles are a harsh place to live Luz, and they chew people up and spit them out. This isn’t a place where things go right for people, especially not kind people. They end up dead, or cursed, or worse.” They looked away for a moment before looking back.

“I’m not going to lie to you about how unlikely it is that we’ll ever find a way.”

Luz sniffled.

“But I can promise you that we’ll never stop trying.”

She clung to them, sobbing while they continued to speak to the other three witches that had gathered around.

“This may be disconnected from our previous goals, but Katya, you were right, we can’t look the other way. We’re the BATTs. How can we stand against the throne if we don’t stand for something? What do we know, and what do we have to find out, what is our goal, and what do we need to accomplish that?”

It was Amber's voice that answered, but she wasn’t answering any part of Raine’s question. “See, you say you want to stay secret, but then you make speeches like that. We could get so much support if you spoke in public!”

“Oh, uh, I don’t, I don’t really think-”

“You do have a knack for inspiring words.” Derwin said next.

“I mean, sure, but there are better-”

Katya chimed in with a knowing grin just as Raine began to blush. “Oh yeah, it would be perfect. Get you up on a stage in front of dozens, maybe even hundreds of people? Imagine how many would be willing to join if you were the one convincing them.”

Raines face was beet red now, and their mouth tight, before they took a deep breath in, held it, and let it out. “You’re all evil, evil children, and I don’t know why I decided to recruit you.”

The conversation descended into long term plans, how to keep find whoevers portal that was, what humans could eat on the isles, and most of all, how to keep their new human safe.

 

Looking down at her new fake ID, thank you Amber, Luz contemplated the lie they’d come up with. It felt bad, abandoning her mama like this, but the BATTs said that if people of the isles knew she was a human she’d be targeted, and if she could trust Katya, she could trust her friends.

This is what her mama would want. She would want Luz to be safe.

Raine held out a hand to her. “You ready to go?” Their face was gentle, if nervous. They weren’t ready for this either, not really, but both of them knew there wasn’t another option.

Slipping the ID that read ‘Luz Whispers’ into her pocket, Luz grabbed the offered hand. “Yeah, I’m ready.”

The pair walked out of the BATTs hideout and into the night.

Notes:

That's the end of Arc One! But arc two is spinning up, and should still be here by next Saturday! Hope you all enjoyed, and remember, the more comments you leave, the more likely I'll update early again...
Oh also! Luz will be learning an instrument, but I havemt chosen which yet. Please, vote in the comments.

Chapter 4: Teenagers Scare the Living **** Out of Me

Raine faked another cough.

“Yes, I’m sorry, it seems I have a rather aggressive strain of the common mold.”

The raven crackled in their hand before a staticy voice came back through. Ugh. You’d think Belos would at least be able to spring for some good equipment if he was going to take over the isles. “Ugh, gross! Yeah, I don’t want to get that crap, I’ll let the boss know you can’t make it in today.”

“Thank-” The other line went dead as their coworker hung up. “-you. Ugh.”

It was astounding how easy it was to fake a sickness. They hadn’t done it since their time at Hexside, running around with Eda and her sister. They really thought that it would have been harder to fool your coworkers than a principal who was all too happy you’d be gone for a day, and probably not blow up another wing of his school.

As they stood up from the table in their kitchen that they had been sitting in, their knees gave them just enough trouble to remind them that those days were well and truly gone. Yeah, they were not a teenager anymore.

Taking the moment to shake their knees out and crack their back, Raine walked back to the stovetop and scooped the omelettes out of the pan they’d been cooking in, depositing them onto plates.

A meal in each hand, they left the kitchen to go find Luz right where they’d left her, on the couch watching the crystal ball.

Raine was still getting used to the size of the couch, the kitchen, the flat-screen crystal ball (and how could a ball be flat, really? It didn’t make any sense! Ugh, marketing), everything really. The head of the bard coven, Eltun Jann, had decided to retire in the upcoming year, and he had named Raine as his replacement.

This had given the bard a certain level of privilege. And by privilege, they meant that they had been put into the mansion meant to hold the head of the bard coven two months ago, when they wouldn’t even become the head for most likely about three.

“It’s too big, Raine, it’s just too much, and I can’t stand it anymore.” Eltun had said. “So, here’s the keys, here’s the deed, and have fun.”

They really hadn’t expected it. The moment had been far too sudden for them to even have the opportunity to say no, and worse, it was technically an order from their superior. They couldn’t afford to be suspicious now, so they hadn’t fought it. Raine Whispers. Resident of one of the most exclusive mansions on the isles. If their former classmates could see them now…

While the house had felt empty at first, maybe it was a blessing in disguise. Their former one bedroom apartment would never have been enough to house them and Luz, at least not comfortably. Here, the human child got a four poster queen size bed, stuffed with Left-Toe-Archipelago griffin down, the softest you could get on the isles.

Raine’s old apartment had a kind of hammock bed scenario, which had not been great for the bard’s back.

They were living in the lap of luxury, and it did not suit them. But, considering all the blankets Luz was wrapped up in as she stared at the crystal ball, it may have suited her.

‘Stephen Everwind, The Dragon Hunter’ was playing, and the kid’s eyes were wide as she stared at the screen.

“Now this one, this one is a real beauty,” said the titular Stephen as he pulled a bush to the side, showing the camera guy a slither beast. The giant white-furred creature was snuffling at some snow covered ground under a tree nearly invisible beneath its blanket of white, only its silhouette shining through.

His voice got lower as he edged closer to the camera. “Besides being a real beauty though, this is also a huge mistake, and no-one should do this. If I get hurt, it would be my mistake, and not this beasties fault, and I understand that.”

Stephen edged closer on the screen as Raine went around the couch to sit down next to Luz.

“Slither beasts like this one are native to the knee, but thanks to their popularity as pets for rich folks a few years back, you can find them in some areas of the skull, and the right hand as well. It’s important to not remove a species from its native environment, because outside of very specific circumstances, the animal will either die, or become an invasive species that throws the whole ecosystem out of whack.”

Luz looked over at Raine. “Are those things real?”

On the screen, Stephen was now petting the wild slither beast. Raine grimaced before looking back to Luz. “Yes, but please don’t try to pet one.”

The girl cocked her head to the side before pointing at the screen. “Why? They’re so cute!”

Stephen began speaking again, this time in a low whisper. “Now, the only reason she’s letting me get so close is because she doesn’t have any slitherlings with her. Y’see, even when the slitherlings aren’t their own, these gorgeous beasties are incredibly protective of their species young. They’ve been known to tear apart dozens of professional witches if they even think a child is in the area.”

The slither beast rubbed its massive head against Stephens hand, beginning to croon.

“He’s a professional Luz, if you or I tried to do this we’d get our hands bitten off, or worse.”

Luz slapped her hands to her face, pulling them to stretch her lower eyelids down until Raine could see the pink beneath. “But it looks so sooooooft.”

The bard chuckled at their new wards' antics and considered trying to explain that softness wasn’t the end all be all of whether or not something should be touched before they heard a sound from the crystal ball in front of them. Stephens voice came through incredibly clear as it changed from the excited happy whisper to fearful full volume words.

“Oh no.” On the screen, two slitherlings had just wandered into the clearing Stephen was in.

The slither beast stopped crooning.

“Go go go!” He yelled, charging the cameraman as the pair began to sprint. Well, Raine assumed that the cameraman was sprinting. The movement was certainly frantic enough.

In the background, a roar could be heard and trees could be seen falling as the show went to commercial.

Raine looked over to Luz and waited for the girl to speak while her mouth hung open. Eventually they realized that she wasn’t going to talk, and took the initiative themselves.

They smirked. “So, you still want to pet the slither beast?”

“No.” It was a mumble. Barely audible.

“What was that?”

Luz sighed. “No, I don’t want to pet the slither beast.”

Raine’s eyes narrowed at Luz’s reaction. This wasn’t what they had been expecting of a friend of Katya’s, she was always sniping at anyone who would participate. It was practically a right of passage to being anywhere near close with the witch!

But Luz didn’t look happy. She wasn’t meeting Raine in the eyes, her legs were pulled up to her chest, and her lower mouth was hidden behind her knees.

One day. One day with a child and they’d already embarrassed her over nothing. Titan, they knew they shouldn’t have taken the child. They could have found another place for her, some well meaning witch or demon, someone sympathetic to their cause.

A little voice sounded in their head. ‘The more people who know, the more likely for the secret to get out. The more likely she’ll be kidnapped, or used for parts, or any number of other horrific things.’

They looked back over at Luz. She was sniffling now. They had to do something.

A cough sounded from the bard’s throat as they held out a peace offering of the eggs they’d made. “I know the conformatorium doesn’t feed people right, so I figured your first real meal should be something special.” They followed with a weak smile as soon as Luz looked up at them. Oh, her lower lip was still trembling, oh no, oh geez.

Katya had mentioned something about Luz being easy to distract, that it was a good way to help her out of a funk. Apparently she’d used it the first (and thankfully only) time that Luz had been taken away by Warden Wrath.

If Raine ever got their hands on that son of a…on him. If Raine ever got their hands on him, well, nobody would ever get any hands on him ever again. The bard would make sure of that.

It was odd to catch themselves censoring their swearing, but they had a kid in the house. They didn’t know how many swears Luz knew, and better to keep that to a minimum as long as possible.

Time to put on the bard face. Affecting a northern isles accent (that Luz would later say sounded similar to the human realm ‘french’ accent), Raine began a speech. “This is, of course, an omelette aux œufs, champignons et saucisse de porc de sang, only the fanciest of foods for you, madame.” They finished with a flourish and a bow.

It took a moment, but there was the sound of a ‘snrk’ from the human they now couldn’t see. Someone stifling laughter.

Oh thank the Titan that worked.

Looking up provided them a view of a child who was still tearing up, still looked frightened, but at least now had a bit of a smile on their face. They smiled back, trying to convey some level of compassion and sympathy with their expression. “I’m sorry for teasing you Luz, I didn’t mean to make you feel bad.”

They pushed forward the plate and Luz picked up the fork. Before she ate, she responded. “It’s okay.”

She went to eat her food before looking back up, as though debating saying something. Evidently silence won the debate, as Luz elected to instead dive into the omelette in front of her while Raine began to eat their own.

Only a moment had passed before Luz looked up at Raine, her face absolutely stuffed. Her plate was empty, she was smiling, things were going well. They had managed to avert a disaster.

As Luz swallowed, something on her face changed. The satisfied happiness of a well fed kid turned into something like concern, edging on horror.“Hey, uh, did that have cheese in it?”

Raine raised one eyebrow. “Yes, why?”

 

No cheese. Raine would no longer be including cheese in any dishes they made for Luz.

They were sitting together on the couch again while something played in the background. Luz looked miserable and Raine was concerned.

Cheese. Cheese had made their new ward sick. What else didn’t they know?

They had called Katya while Luz was in the bathroom, but the girl hadn’t been able to talk for long, only warning Raine not to tease Luz again or she would ‘Come over there and show you what happens when you tease the kid.’

They hadn’t needed a threat! They had needed advice, and out of everyone, Katya knew Luz the best!

Sadly this wasn’t to be. Katya had been in the conformatorium for nearly a month, and while her boss let her keep her job, thank goodness for Oxfoot generosity, she still had bills to catch up on, among other things.

So here they were, a sick child next to them, and no real way to help them except to wait and not give them cheese in the future. Why had they thought they could take care of a child?

Said child let out a grumble while continuing to clutch her stomach.

This couldn’t go on. This couldn’t go on, and this couldn’t happen again. They were Raine Whispers, they were better than this! They had started a rebellion against a tyrant, they had fought wild homunculi, heck, they had dated the Owl Lady.

They could take care of a child.

All they had to do was find out what Luz needed.

Looking back toward the child, they took a moment to consider their approach. Gentle, boisterous, fast, slow, what would this audience of one best respond to?

She doesn’t really get teasing.

She was easily distracted.

She was already having a terrible day.

Only one real way forward.

“So, what else are we going to have to avoid?”

“What?”

“Well, cheese is obviously off the grocery list. What uh, what else do we need to keep out of the house?” Titan, they hoped they were coming across right.

Luz was having trouble meeting their eyes. “You don’t have to change what you eat just for me.”

Raine pushed forward. “I know, but I’m going to.”

“Why?”

They raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

“I…why? You barely know me and you’re just going to cut something out of your life for me?”

Raine pursed their lips. How to explain this properly…

“Luz, I.”

The child in question waited, obviously confused.

How did they explain this properly? They didn’t even understand it themself! They just…they just needed to make sure Luz was okay. It wasn’t like they needed cheese. They were sure they could go without whatever else would make their. Would make Luz feel so sick.

The bard took a moment and collected themselves. They could remember how adults had interacted with them when they were a kid, they could remember how other bards had interacted with younger students, and they could remember what had and hadn’t worked. They just. They just had to be confident. Yeah, confident. They could do confident.

“I’m responsible for you now.” Where had that come from? “I’m responsible for you Luz, and that means it’s my job to make sure that you’re safe, and if I can, make sure that you’re happy. This is part of that, so please, is there anything else I should avoid bringing into the house?” Nailed it Whispers.

Luz looked back up at them, trying to gauge something before mumbling out a response. “Anything with milk in it will do that. And I’m allergic to nuts.”

How this was so difficult for the child to admit, Raine may never know. But, they did know how to make sure that she felt more confident voicing her ideas in the future. At least, they knew a method that had worked on Amber.

Katya and Derwin liked to joke that it had worked ‘too well’, but Raine was happy with the result. If the youngest of the BATTs could bring herself to speak in more than a whisper, then they had gotten what they wanted.

“Thank you, Luz.” They said with a smile, reaching over to give the kid a hug. “Give me one second.”

Afterwards, Raine stood up and put a finger to their lips, much to Luz’s confusion. They winked once, and went to the kitchen, doing their best to make as much ridiculous noise as possible. Pots clattered together, they faked a plate being smashed, a few cupboards opened and closed. Really, a ridiculous amount of noise for what was happening.

“Raine? Are you okay?”

Her voice was edging closer to concern, which meant it was time to finish up.

“I’m fine, just a minute!”

With one last loud noise (a rolling pin hitting some dough that they had been planning to use to make bread later. They had been lucky that this particular recipe hadn’t called for any milk) they finished their plan and exited the kitchen with a small bowl.

“Here, I figured we needed something sweet.”

In their hands was a gigantic bowl of the sweetest, least healthy, most sticky candy they had ever managed to find on the isles. It was impossible to eat without getting your hand glued to something, and every time they ate it they were glad that somehow a basic cleaning spell was still accessible to them, even with the coven mark.

It was ridiculous. It was silly. Some would argue that this form of positive reinforcement was condescending.

None of that could change the fact that it worked wonders.

For the next rest of the day they sat with their new ward, watching trash shows and eating food that was terrible for you. It reminded Raine of another witch they used to spend a lot of time with. This would have been her kind of time after something as exhausting as this day had been.

Raine looked over to the now laughing Luz and smiled. Funny who can remind you of who you’ve lost.

Notes:

Jeez louise this chapter did NOT want to be written. Huge thanks to blue_flowers, VisionaryScribe, and Ito (Itonomen). Without them this chapter would not have been finished any time soon.

Chapter 5: I'm Not Okay

Notes:

Hello everyone, and happy Friday! I figured I could give y'all an update a day early, so here you go! Hope you enjoy. Votes on what Luz will play are still open if you'd like, but get them in by next week! She will have her instrument by the end of the next chapter.

For the first time since she arrived in this realm, Luz woke up well rested, in a bed that wasn’t terribly uncomfortable, in a place where she felt relatively safe.

Sure, she had woken up in the same bed the day before, but she had still been carrying all the stress from the...from the place she and Katya had been. Fun to realize that she didn’t even want to think about that place.

But she didn’t have to think about it! She was in a mansion, she was under the care of a cool rebel musician who tried their best, and she was ready to face the day!

As she moved to get out of the bed, her foot was caught in one of the many fancy comforters covering her new, fancy bed, and she fell face first onto the wonderful, fancy, hard wooden floor.

“Mrphg.”

That was the first sound Luz made that day as she attempted to escape the trap her bed had put her in, away from the twisted fabric somehow attached to her bed, her ankle, and seemingly an incredibly spiteful spirit she had somehow offended.

She struggled with the blankets. “Mph, rgh, let, me, Go!”

Needless to say, the blankets did not let her go. If anything, they grew into a more complex knot just to spite her.

Eventually she managed to disentangle herself from the bed, and escape the apparent trap that she had slept in. A great start to the day. Perfect. Didn’t bode poorly at all.

Normally, she was a morning person. Really, she was, she had woken her mama earlier than a rooster could crow enough times to know. But something about the week in prison, mad dash from prison, and possibility of never seeing said mama again really took it out of her.

Something about starting the day slamming her entire face into the floor made her feel a little less like a morning person. For some reason. Somehow.

Eventually Luz made her way downstairs, and she found herself eating breakfast with her new…guardian? What did she call them? When the knowledge actually hit.

Neither of them really knew what to do with her.

Raine looked over in her direction and coughed before speaking. “So, I can’t keep on faking being sick. I do have to go to work today. Are you going to be alright on your own?”

She nodded, even though she wasn’t really sure.

“Are you sure? I have some contacts who can come by-”

Luz waved a hand back and forth. “Psh, I’ll be fine! I’m fourteen, I don’t need a babysitter.”

The disbelieving look given in response caused her to release an indignant “Hey!”

Raine raised their hands in surrender. “Okay, okay, you don’t need a babysitter, you are fourteen. But I do need you to promise me something, alright?”

She nodded, and the bard spoke again.

"It's too dangerous for someone without magic to go out in the boiling isles alone, so please, stay inside for now?"

Luz looked outside, at this magical world that she’d been in but unable to explore for over a week, and was overcome with a sudden longing.

In the sky, she could see people flying around on what she had assumed were broomsticks at first, but thanks to Katya's patience in the conformatorium she now knew were staves with magical animal friends on the ends. Further than that, there were the bones of the Titan, the creature this entire civilization was based upon, jutting up from the landscape. Ribs, fingers, even a skull with horns way out there. Just next door, there was some green haired girl making giant purple monsters. She was fighting with the things she summoned, making magic circles, and in general making a mess of the backyard neighboring Luz's own. A training montage. Luz was watching a real, actual, magic training montage not even a block away!

She hadn't realized that she was pressing her face up against the glass until Raine had peeled her off.

"I know the isles are beautiful and new and interesting to you Luz, I get it, but please, promise me that if you want to go out you'll call Katya, Amber, or Derwin first to go with you? Or wait for me?"

The pleading look in the green haired witches eyes was far, far too similar to her mamas for comfort, and Luz found it impossible to say no to.

She nodded quickly. “I promise, I will not let you down Raine!”

The Bard smiled. "Thank you Luz. I promise, tonight we'll find something more for you to do than relax, alright?"

Luz let out an excited gasp. “Really!? Oh that’s great! I’m so excited!”

Raine laughed and nodded, before awkwardly going for a wave goodbye while Luz went for a hug, and then the pair switched and Raine went for a hug while Luz just tried to wave. In the end the pair parted ways with some odd mix of the two and the laughter of people who knew that they were awkward and had just learned to roll with it.

And with that the bard was gone, away for a day of work at a coven.

A magical coven.

A magical coven that Luz would never get to see because she was inside all day and couldn't go out because a dang tree might eat her!

She eyed the trees skeptically through the window. Surely, they couldn't be that dangerous?

Choosing that moment to act, the tree she was watching opened its maw and maneuvered its branches to swallow a bird in the midst of taking off.

Her curious face turned into a grimace, and she pulled the blinds shut to partially drown out the crunching sound. "Yeah, no, I'm gonna stay inside." She said, to nobody in particular.

Exploring the house revealed nothing that she found remotely interesting.

There was a Library, all books within seemingly dry texts about properly filing music sheets in another library.

There were a multitude of guest bedrooms, none used, most covered in cobwebs, and nearly all smelling dusty.

There was an observatory up at the top of the house, filled with star charts and a giant telescope. It was the day though, so it wasn't exactly entertaining. She definitely didn’t try looking through it anyway and nearly blind herself.

“At least it's better than the...than prison.” She shivered at the memory. Sure, she couldn’t leave, but it wasn’t a prison. She was inside for her own safety, not because someone else had decided that it was better for the world if she never saw the light of day ever again and was left to rot with nothing for food except for whatever was in that terrible soup.

She wasn’t in prison. She was just. She was just having a day inside. Yeah. A day inside.

While there was more of the house to explore, by that point in the day she had grown tired of trying to find something entertaining, and settled on going back down to the crystal ball room.

Maybe she could find something actually entertaining to watch. Besides, even after touring half the house, she hadn’t found anything more comfortable than that couch.

So, she settled in, grabbed the remote, and started looking for something to occupy her time. Flipping through channels eventually led to another episode of "Green's Anatomy", some drama set in the healing coven that she’d glimpsed the previous day with Raine before the bard clicked away from it.

It was better than nothing.

The story was centering a victim of some unknown curse that the healers were trying to diagnose and help, but it focused more on M’arkus Worthon and Emerald Green's relationship. Apparently he had kissed her twin sister's clone, who had been implanted with her memories, and had then dissolved into mist on their wedding day.

Emerald was angry at him not because he had kissed another woman, but because he had decided that he had to marry her within a week of their first kiss, and the episode had spent about twenty five minutes just showing them arguing.

Luz hated it, but somehow she couldn’t turn away. She had to know what would happen.

"But Healer Green," said a man who flipped his head back one way far too quickly, "we have to help this man!" His hair had somehow managed to settle back into the exact same position after the flip of his head.

The titular Healer Green turned to face him, and the camera (did the boiling isles use cameras? Or some kind of image capturing spell) zoomed in. "We can't M'arkus, if we do, it could curse the whole city!"

Tears were coming from M'arkus now. "Dammit Green, we have to try!"

He rushed through some doorway while Green was holding out an arm, screaming "Wait!", only to be blasted back in a wave of off-green magical energy.

"M'arkus no!"

Then the credits rolled.

"What? No no no I have to know what happened! Tell meee!!!"

While this was a strange magical land, with plenty of quirks Luz didn't know, she did know that pleading with the crystal ball to show her what happened next was a fruitless endeavor. This didn't stop her from trying, of course. But she wasn't surprised when it failed.

Credits continued to roll while some mediocre pop song played in the background.

Luz found her hands in her hair and herself out of her seat. "Uuuugh, this is toooorture! Come on, what's next!?"

Finally, a voice came through the crystal ball. Where the speakers were, she couldn't say. "Come back next season for the next chapter in the story of, Green's Anatomy."

"Aaaaaaaahhh!!!!!!"

She flung the remote at the ball, and luckily, it bounced off without any damage, but this was not enough for Luz’s angry mind.

“Why would they cut off right there!? Is M’arkus dead? Did they get a curse put on the whole city? I need to know!”

With no answers forthcoming, she shut off the crystal ball and screamed into a pillow.

Looking up, she could see that outside the window there was some kind of magical deer eating on their back lawn.

It was a beautiful blue creature, and its antlers glowed a ghostly white. It’s movements were filled with grace as it bent down to take another bite of grass.

If Luz could have seen her own eyes, she would have seen that they appeared filled with stars. “You’re beautiful.” She whispered as she pressed her face up against the glass.

All thoughts of Green’s Anatomy forgotten, she watched as the creature grew closer and closer to the window she was watching it through. Its hair looked finer than silk, and it had a mane that glowed with a teal energy. As it approached, she could make out butterflies dancing around the beast, occasionally landing on it, if only for a moment.

Eventually it was directly outside the window, and she could hear that with every step it took came another note in some kind of song, making even its movement a beautiful thing to behold. “Ooooh, I want to pet you so bad!”

The deer thing shook its head, causing a tinkling of bells as it met Luz’s eyes. They were inches apart. It almost seemed like the creature was begging her to pet it.

“Well, I mean, it’s a deer, it’s not like it’s going to hurt me.” Luz said, justifying her action to nobody. She reached up to unlock the window.

Before she could, the thing's mouth opened down to it’s neck into a gaping maw filled with teeth and two tongues. It slammed into the window directly where Luz had been, prompting a shriek as she fell backwards in surprise. The creature continued to bang on the window as Luz scrambled back from the window and shrieked.

The thing that was clearly not a magic deer paid no heed to her scream and continued to slam into the window five more times before stopping, giving in to the power of the glass. It snorted once and then trotted away.

Luz narrowed her eyes at it and laughed nervously before speaking. “Haha, okayyyy, definitely not going outside anytime soon.”

Looking out the window revealed the creature, still beautiful, as it made its exit from the property. It moved at a much more leisurely pace, a trot, a walk even.

She wanted to be angry at it, she really did, but. “Aw, I can’t stay mad at you.”

It was only a whisper, but it was true. It was just… the creature was too beautiful for her to hate! She watched as its amble slowly brought it to the woods bordering the lawn, and then it walked in and disappeared.

Luz sighed. “Goodbye, murder-deer.” She pressed one hand to the glass. “I wish I had gotten to pet you.”

Looking back around the house, she realized she still had nothing to do.

Giving up on finding something on her own inside the house, she admitted defeat. She should have let Raine call someone, someone who had actual magic and would know to avoid the not deer things that stalked the isles. So, she called Katya.

"Sorry Luz, I would but I have a lot of work to catch up on. I'm lucky to still have a job after a stint in the conformatorium."

And then, She called Amber.

"I have plans today already, but maybe Friday afternoon?"

Finally, she tried calling Derwin.

"I would, but I have a recital tomorrow and I have to practice. Sorry Luz."

Luz collapsed onto the couch, scroll in hand.

She was trapped.

Trapped in a house with nothing to do.

Trapped all over again.

It was a bigger prison than before, but it was still a prison. She'd simply traded one for another.

Stuck in a terrifying world that she was quickly realizing she knew nothing about, a place with monsters that ate children, a place where you could be thrown in prison for being annoying, Luz began to cry.

 

Raine’s day at the Coven had been relatively peaceful. Some small amount of paperwork, a rubber stamp here and there. The oddest thing had been people avoiding them like the plague in order to not catch whatever they had.

They smiled to themself. They may have to fake being sick more often if it kept that many people away. So many fewer complaints. So many times people decided to figure something out themselves when they saw the bags under Raine’s eyes and made an assumption.

Reaching their home was a simple walk, and the sun hadn’t set yet. They’d picked up some groceries and managed to avoid running into anyone they knew at the store. There was nowhere near enough energy left in their reserves for a conversation made up of pleasantries and small talk.

Opening their door, they didn’t see anyone. “Luz, I’m home!”

When there was no response, they grew suspicious. Maybe she was just taking a nap? She’d been through a stressful week, maybe her body was finally forcing her to recuperate, shutting itself down a little?

They continued their walk through the house, putting some groceries away as they searched.

“Luz, are you okay?”

There was still no response. They were beginning to grow concerned, but they knew their door hadn’t been opened thanks to a few built-in wards, and the human couldn’t get in too much trouble inside the house.

“Luz? Where are you?”

There was a small whimper from somewhere near the living room.

Hurrying over, Raine was treated to the sight of a shivering Luz in front of a shut down crystal ball.

Quickly, they looked around the room. Had someone broken in? Had something happened? Was Luz hurt in any way?

No windows were broken, there was no blood, there were no dark shapes in the corners, and there was no telltale whiff of ozone to imply magic usage.

They knelt down next to the teenager, “Luz what happened? Are you okay?”

It was a quiet voice that responded. “I don’t know.”

“Okay, alright, can you take a few deep breaths for me?” Something was wrong, something was seriously wrong. They began to breathe themselves, deep breath, and a deep breath out. Something for her to follow along with.

It took far longer than Raine was comfortable with, long enough that they got worried it wasn’t going to work and they were going to have to call in some specialist help, but eventually Luz managed to stabilize her breathing into something deeper, and she seemed to have calmed down, at least a little.

“How are you feeling, a little better?”

The girl nodded, and Raine nodded in response. Why they were nodding, they couldn’t tell you. It just seemed to be the thing to do.

“I’m going to grab you a cup of water, and then we can try to figure out what happened, alright?”

Luz nodded again, and Raine left for just a moment.

In the kitchen, their hands were shaking, and they ran one through their hair as the other fumbled with drawers looking for a glass. What had they been thinking, they couldn’t take care of a child, much less a freshly traumatized one! But there was nobody else to take her!

They could feel hot tears coming to their eyes as their own breath started to waver. They couldn’t do this, they couldn’t do this, they couldn’t do this. How would they not fail?

One hand rose to cover their mouth. They couldn’t let Luz hear them cry, they couldn’t make this worse. That was the motivation they needed.

Quickly, the bard wiped their face clean, filled a cup of water, and put on their best performer’s smile. Something false, but something that would last. Or at least it would last long enough to put Luz at ease. They could have a breakdown later.

As their hand stopped shaking, they made it back to the living room to see Luz, cautiously looking around instead of the vacant stare she had when they came home.

They put the water in her hands. “Can you tell me what happened?”

She blushed and looked to the side before mumbling something.

Raine leaned forward. “What was that? I didn’t quite hear you.”

Luz mumbled a little louder. “I felt like I was back in the conformatorium.”

“Aw Luz, I’m sorry kid-”

“I couldn’t leave!” She wasn’t looking at them anymore. “I was, I was, I was trapped again!” Tears were coming from her eyes, which were themselves looking more and more vacant. “I, I, I.”

Luz trailed off, saying nothing as she stared into the distance and let out a small whimper one more time.

Raine was barely holding themself back from visible panic as they began to speak. “Hey, hey, it’s okay, you’re not there, you’re alright, you’re alright.”

They continued this for a minute until Luz surged forward into a hug.

“Please don’t leave me trapped again.”

Surprise overcame them for what was almost too long before they returned the hug. “Okay, okay, I won’t leave you trapped again. Next time, I’ll call someone, or take you to work with me, or something, okay?”

Luz nodded into them, seemingly unable to speak.

“I’m sorry Luz.”

The child nodded again.

For a long time, the pair remained in that position, Luz quietly crying into her new guardian's chest as Raine comforted their new ward as best they could.

Chapter 6: Skylines and Turnstiles

Notes:

A little shorter than usual, but I want to keep to a schedule of uploading every Saturday if I can! I'm sorry, Luz will not be getting an instrument this week! I have that chapter written, but, well. I realized it belongs deeper into the fic.
For now, heres a treat with my favorite OC in the fandom, thank you for letting me include her Ito.

The candle lighting up Raines office flickered, guttered, and almost went out for just a moment. It was running low, its wax having collected into a deep, solidifying pool on its own mount. Earlier the same evening, it had been three times its current length.

Light spilled from it anyways, illuminating a room in disarray. The desk was covered in papers, books were removed from the bookshelves and piled high on random tables and chairs scattered throughout the room, and there was some pile of what appeared to be clothing leaning on the dest.

Piles of clothing don’t groan though.

Raine Whispers raised their head from their despair to look around their desk again, hoping to find something they could do, someone they could trust.

The trauma their da-. Luz? Their ward? They shook their head. Better to keep in the mind of the lie, it would make slip ups further down the line less likely.

The trauma their daughter had experienced was too fresh in her mind, and they felt like a fool for not having seen it earlier. Isolation and confinement were not viable options. Not that they ever really had been, but even as a temporary measure they wouldn’t work.

“I wish I could just send you to Hexside.”

It was a mumble, and a thought they’d had many times over the past day. Sure, the school wasn’t perfect, but they’d seen how their kid reacted to educational television. The wide starry eyes of someone who loved to learn.

But that wasn’t to be.

Without magic, Luz’s options were depressingly limited.

They couldn’t leave her alone the next day, but they couldn’t skip their work again, and the bard coven was no place for a teenager with a fear of imprisonment. Maybe as a last resort, but the place was so boring that even they felt like they were in the conformatorium sometimes.

What it would do to their daughter, well… they didn’t want to even imagine.

The earlier evening had been education enough.

Already they knew that the usual suspects wouldn’t be available. Derwin’s upcoming recital and Amber’s plans that…well, Raine was glad the girl was coming out of her shell, but those plans weren’t something they wanted Luz joining in.

They doubted Amber would want that either.

And of course they couldn’t ask Katya. Oxfoot was great, but she couldn’t afford to just give Katya money any more than Raine could, and the girl needed some funds after her own time in the conformatorium.

 

It was at this moment that they realized how few friends their own age they had.

Which was to say, none. They had no friends their own age. The bard had been focusing on their revolution for so long that they only had coworkers and co-conspirators left in their social circle.

They slumped backwards in their chair and let out a groan as they raised their hands to rub at the circles under their eyes.

Somewhere above them their daughter was sleeping, hopefully having a night better than her day had been.

“What am I going to do?”

The question was asked with a deep sorrow behind it, and for a moment, Raine wished that they had joined the oracle track instead of the bard track. Had given themselves some ability to look into the future, or at least look for a path towards it.

A sudden buzzing saw the bards head quickly swivel to the side, with their body following a touch too fast to be safe. Their arms fumbled for purchase as their legs kicked forward, but the pointlessness of their endeavor was soon revealed.

One sudden full body jerk later, and Raine’s chair was on its back, their legs were in the air, and their head had barely managed to avoid the edge of the coffee table.

Another buzzing from their scroll prompted them to swear, before verbally responding, “I’m coming, I’m coming.”

They shot a glare at the scroll once they had it in their hands. Two messages, unknown number.

Unknown Number : Hello Mx.Whispers, I believe we must meet.

Their eyes widened. What was this, was someone going to blackmail them? Did someone already know Luz’s origin? Had the emperor found out about the BATTs?

Scenario after scenario ran through their head, and their fingers shook as they scrolled down to read the next hext. Katya had mentioned that they had their text set too large on their scroll, but they already had glasses, they didn’t need to strain their vision more.

Unknown Number : Oh dear, I have been informed my last message may have been somewhat foreboding. This is Nora Oxfoot, Katya’s Employer.

A breath held without knowledge was released, and a head slumped backwards as the new parent felt some level of relief.

Just Oxfoot.

Just. Oxfoot.

She wasn’t a bad person or anything, certainly not someone to be afraid of, but sometimes the way that the oracle talked to people put Raine on edge in a way they couldn’t quite explain.

Me : Hello Nora, what’s going on?

The little dots at the bottom of their screen that Katya had told them indicated typing showed up, and stayed for about a minute.

N.O. : My employee was despondent for lack of your child, who she appears to have grown quite attached to. In addition, I believe your duties in the coven are due for an expansion.
Perhaps we may come to a mutually beneficial arrangement?

 

“So,” they took a bite of their cereal. “I think I found a place you can go for the day.”

Luz looked up at her new…it still felt weird, but she knew what being caught would mean in this world.

Luz looked up at her definitely not new O’pa, who had been her O’pa her entire life, of course. Definitely, no question.

She swallowed her food, some weird sugary cereal called ‘Sinnamon Bone Crunch’.

It was actually remarkably similar to Froot Loops.

“I thought I was just going to go to work with you?”

The bard flinched, and Luz knew she’d found some kind of guilt. “Yes, well, I don’t actually think I could do … that.”

One eyebrow rose. “Why not?”

Raine sighed. “I know you don’t want to be cooped up, but, well. The bard coven office is… it’s incredibly boring Luz. I think you would feel more like you were in a prison than if you were here, so that’s a last resort.”

She rose her eyebrow even further. “Really? But… you’re bards, wouldn’t your offices be filled with like… practice halls, and composers, and art?”

Already she could imagine the art adorning the walls.

“Ooh, do you have moving paintings? Instruments that play themselves? O’pa,” that still felt weird, “are there battles of bands?”

Raine’s face twitched just enough that she thought they might have noticed wince, but the bard recovered with a smile just too filled with humor to be pitying. “Not exactly, no.”

“Then what?”

The bard's smile turned half way into a helpless shrug, halfway into one hand scratching the back of their head, and had a hint of awkward laughter added. How they managed to fit so many different pieces of body language into one motion was a sight to behold, but the effect was one that conveyed awkward discomfort to a degree Luz could easily relate to. “Well, it’s mostly paperwork.”

Well, she could work with that. “What about the walls? I mean, you’ve got to have some cool paintings, right?”

If anything, Raine’s expression became even more strained. “We have paint, but it’s really just the paint that makes the walls beige. I think Martin has a poster of a kitten in his office somewhere? But that might have been against regulation.”

Her mouth gaped open like that of a fish, before opening, then closing, then opening again.

“But that’s-”

“I know.”

“But it’s-”

“Mhm.”

“You’re bards though!”

At this, Raine simply nodded as Luz expressed her utter disappointment at the state of the world.

“How can you create with no art!?”

The chuckling that came after her question was not one of happiness, but the laughter of barely contained fury. “Oh, we can’t! Not unless we want to jump through seven different hoops, get approval from five sub directors, and then have anything we’re planning on making vetoed anyways!”

“But you’re bards!” She whined again.

Raine stood up from the table slowly, pushing their chair backwards. They straightened their back, closed their eyes, and lifted their nose into the air. “Miss Whispers,” they said, affecting an odd accent Luz couldn't recognize, but sounded very snooty. One finger rose to point in the air. “A prrrrroper bard must not foment unrest, or startle citizens with unknown sounds that they claim are some form of music.” They sniffed haughtily, and pulled their head to the side. “Why, even the suggestion of creativity is ridiculous! I simply must find my fainting couch!”

Luz snorted, and covered her mouth with one hand.

From somewhere, Raine pulled out a chalkboard and some chalk.

“Now, in order to properly ensure one’s own skill, a bard must be excellent at all intricacies of their instrument!” they drew a spell circle in the air, and from it dropped a violin. “Here!” They held it out to her, head still held high in the air.

She took it, still struggling to contain giggles.

“Pay attention please,” they drew another spell circle, and out fell a book. “Familiarize yourself with all pieces of the instrument, their names, functions, and materials. After that, perhaps you may attempt to pluck a string at a steady pace.”

Unable to hold a straight face anymore, the bard’s smile cracked through the imperious facade they were holding and they began to laugh.

Shortly afterwards, Luz joined in.

“Is it really like that?”

They wiggled a hand back and forth. “I may have exaggerated a little, but it’s fairly close.”

“Okay, so, bard coven hq is a last resort, got it. Where am I going to go then?”

“Actually, I got a message last night form Katyas boss…”

 

Me : Katya :D !!!!!! O’pa let me borow their phone!!! Hi!

Kittykat : Luz!! So, are they letting you come hang out with me at work today?

Me : Yes! We’re on a bug over right now! Also awegrserv, do you know what Raine has you in their phone as?

Kittykat : … yes.

Me : >:3

Kittykat : Luz, do not.

Me : Dont what, Kittykat?

Kittykat : I thought you weren’t good at teasing people!

Me : O’pa has tauht me well :p

Kittykat : Oh no, look, ah, a flaming rock has crushed the store, so sad, guess you can’t come hang out.

Me : D:< I can SEE THE STORE, KATYA!

Kittykat : You must be confused, there is no store, it was destroyed by a misfired spell.

Me : :’(

Kittykat : Oh that’s not fair, this is a double standard. You can tease me but I can’t tease you?

Me : :’’’’(

Kittykat : You’re not gonna get to me Luz!

Me : :’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’(

Kittykat : See you at the store you little monster!

As the bug pulled to a stop, Luz put the scroll away and looked up at Raine sitting next to her. They looked back down at her.

On the witches face was a look of fear and concerned, emphasized by the biting of their lip, the tapping of their foot, and the way that their eyes flicked back and forth.

“You’re sure you’re okay with this?”

Luz was vibrating in anticipation, and she nodded her head quickly. “Yes, definitely!”

“You have my work number if anything goes wrong?”

She nodded again.

Raine nodded in return. “Okay. Okay, let's go introduce you to Nora.”

The interior of Good Fortunes was eclectic, to say the least. From the outside, it appeared to be a normal one story shop with more building atop. A window display for vintage clothing and other knick knacks.

But once you entered the interior, you were met with a maze of objects, big and small. They seemed to Luz to almost be arranged to confuse, and with the lighting situated as it was, it was a dazzling array of sparking colors.

While there didn’t seem to be any organization to the shop, no matter where she turned, she would find what she was looking for. There were clothes, the perfect size for her, just inside the door.

One was a fancy tuxedo, with red rhinestones embedded in the pattern of a rose on one lapel. Another mannequin was adorned with a white tank top, white pants, and a bright yellow jacket that fastened with belt buckles instead of buttons or zippers. Yet a third was a loose, white, ruffled shirt, tucked into tight black pants, with a purple coat that would almost reach her feet with its tails.

They were all. So. Cool.

“Rai- O’pa, can I get some of these?”

“Well, let’s check the-” As Raine lifted the price tags to look, Luz could see the color drain from their face.

“Ah, Luz, I don’t think we can afford them right now.”

“Well I would certainly hope not.”

Both whispers jumped as a voice came from above and behind them. Turning slowly, there was revealed to be a titanic woman, at least seven feet tall if not taller. Broad shouldered, and in a long flowing skirt, there she stood, horns and all.

Wait, horns?

“Hello Raine, hello Luz, welcome to my store.” She said with a calm smile. “I am Nora Oxfoot. Katya has told me a lot about you.”

“I-she has?” Luz was suddenly nervous again. “I mean, of course she has, because, we’re friends, and you agreed to let me stay here for the day, because we wanted to hang out but she was busy with work, and that's all and there’s no other reason.”

In the distance, she could hear the sound of Katya’s palm hitting her face. A sound she had grown familiar with through the many times the older girl had tried to teach her to lie.

One side of Nora's mouth quirked up into a smile as she glanced back and forth between the two of them.

This was it.

They were going to be caught, and she’d be thrown back in the Conformatorium, or worse! Raine was going to lose their position, the BATTs would be rounded up, all because she couldn’t lie!

The proprietor of Good Fortunes let out a quiet laugh quite at odds with her stature as one of her hands softly came down on Raines shoulder.

“I can see the resemblance.”

Chapter 7: Cubicles

Notes:

I am so sorry for being a day late, this chapter just did NOT want to be written! But, here it is, and I hope you all enjoy!

Nora liked to consider herself a good boss. She gave Katya good hours, made sure the girl was paid on time and in full, and liked to check up on her to make sure that the young witch was doing alright.

She also liked to think of herself as observant. She was an oracle, she had to be. When one peers into the weaving and woven threads of fate, ones eye must be sharp and ones wit must be sharper, lest you follow a foolish path because the strand was pretty.

Lastly, she liked to consider herself fun. Throughout the years, she had quite a few jobs that she couldn’t have any fun with, but in Good Fortunes she felt that both she and Katya could have fun. Bartering with customers was always entertaining, and her ability to rearrange the store on a whim always made for an entertaining exercise in interior decoration.

Yes, Nora was, all in all, a good boss.

It was because of this that she noticed the previous day when her favorite (and only) employee looked worried.

Katya was never what she would call excited to work in an antiques store, and she couldn’t blame the girl. It was a relatively quiet life, and most of their customers were sweet older folks. They spent a lot of time just making sure that their pieces looked nice and were well dusted, and sometimes days would go by without a single customer.

Exactly the quiet kind of life that Nora craved.

Exactly the kind of quiet life that it was plain to see Katya could barely stand.

She was a good worker, a hard worker, and an honest worker. She never called in sick unless she had to (though to be honest Nora would have been fine with it. Everyone deserves a little off time). She was always there on time. And she was a great saleswoman. Something about the bard curriculum made those with that form of education into natural salespeople. Probably had to do with the emphasis on charisma.

However, even with all of this going for her it had always been clear that she wanted to do something more exciting. As much as the young adult tried to hide it, Nora could see when she slumped over display cases and sighed, could hear when she sometimes mumbled ‘is this all I’m gonna do with my life?’

Then one day the girl had up and disappeared. No call, no hext, nothing, just didn’t come into work and didn’t answer her scroll.

So Nora did the only logical thing and immediately went to her apartment to check on her. Knocking on the door revealed that it was unlocked, and ever so slightly ajar, but the interior revealed nothing more than exactly the sort of mess she would expect of the girl.

In addition to the mess, there was Katya’s scroll, lying on the coffee table.

This was worrying enough, and Nora could only think of one habit that Katya had, or used to have, that could lead to something like this. So, with the roots of worry worming their way around her heart, Nora headed for the closest bar she could find.

She wanted to find Katya. But a part of her was also very much hoping she didn’t.

The bar was dark and had very few patrons, none of whom were Katya. When she asked the bartender if he’d seen Katya, the grizzled old boar demon smiled the smile of someone surprised at their own pride in someone else. He hadn’t seen her in years, and good thing too, he likes having regulars, but that girl was... destroying herself, and he was glad to see her getting sober.

Nora was glad too, but she wasn’t glad that her search required yet another stop, and the worry that had started with squeezing her heart turned into a heavier weight with every step.

As always seems to be the case, third try is the charm. Raine Whispers was an old friend of hers, and had been a teacher (and surrogate O’pa from what she’d picked up) to Katya for the last few years. They were exactly who she would need to call in order to find out what had happened to her wayward employee. She hoped.

When the conversation came to a close though her hopes were dashed.

Not because she didn’t find out where Katya was. She knew, and she knew well.

Nora’s hopes were dashed because she also knew just how rare it was for one to leave the conformatorium, or at least, to leave it without having left something of yourself behind.

For nearly a month she had taken care of her shop alone, and over those weeks she wasn’t ashamed to admit she had cried at how much she missed having the girl around. It was supposed to be her and Katya taking care of the shop, even if the girl would eventually move on to bigger things. Being there alone felt…wrong.

And then, just as suddenly as the girl had left, Nora had received a call.

Her scroll had rung. It was early in the morning, very early, in fact she hadn’t yet opened her shop.

So early in fact that she hadn’t yet gotten out of bed.

Removing her lusciously fluffy comforter, rolling herself out of the depression she had made in her griffin-down mattress topper, and pulling the curtain of her four poster bed to the side, Nora released a grumble before she answered the phone.

“This had better be important.”

She hadn’t been expecting an answer, not really. Oracle magic was…strange to say the least. A combination of instinct, luck, and some strange force choosing to whisper in your ear. Those who chose it as a path had to be careful with what questions they asked, or even implied, lest they receive an answer.

Most learned that lesson quickly, saying something like ‘I’m going to be with you forever.’ and receiving a bitter taste filling their throat, or asking ‘why me?’ to the sky, and seeing an image of a friend who had apparently not been a friend, and in fact ruined their life for money.

Nora thought that she had learned this lesson, she really did. But this time, there was too much to process.

She saw a battle between a giant and a million swarming bees.

She saw a vibrating tower of shimmering metal shaking a cracked landscape to pieces.

She saw red, a vibrant red, and heard a beating that seemed to come from all around her.

As abruptly as they had come, they stopped. She found herself stumbling backwards, her hand reaching out to grip one of the posters of her bed and stall her fall.

What was that?

Never had she received a vision so clear, but similarly, she had never received one so ridiculously cryptic. Any of those could mean practically anything, and what did that have to do with-

Her scroll rang again, snapping her from this daze. She stood up from her bed once more and walked over to her desk, picking it up to stare at it. Such a little thing, to hold an event that would apparently shake the world. Something so monumental as to be Whatever was going to come from the other side was something that would change her world indeed.

The voice coming through the other end was one filled with concern.

“Heyyyyy, boss.”

And just like that, Katya was back. The poor girl kept apologizing for missing so many days of work throughout the entire conversation, only pausing when Nora admitted that she knew where Katya had been.

It had taken her ten minutes to convince the girl that she wasn’t going to be let go for being thrown in prison, but, convince her she had.

So, Katya came back to work. Like always, she was a good worker, a good saleswoman, exactly what Nora had come to expect of the young bard.

In the middle of the day though, the girl got a call. She was busy rearranging the front of the store to put baby clothes in front of toddler clothes when her scroll rang. Nora had asked her to after seeing some interesting signs in her lunchtime tea, and at this point Katya knew well enough to not even ask where the oracle had gotten her information.

Nora had been happy that the young witch had finally learned that the only answer she would get was a smile and a wink.

Half of an oracle's power was in presentation, after all.

In any case, Katya had received a call.

Nora didn’t eavesdrop, she wasn’t that kind of person. But, as luck would have it, she was more than close enough to accidentally overhear.

“Hello?”

"Sorry Luz, I would but I have a lot of work to catch up on. I'm lucky to still have a job after a stint in the conformatorium."

“Yeah, maybe this weekend. See you later, kid.”

She hung up her scroll and went back to work, a frown now gracing her face.

“So,” Nora said, sidling up to her employee. “Who was that?”

Katya sighed. “Just this poor kid, we met in the conformatorium, she’s been having a really rough go of it.”

Nora nodded, providing a quiet ‘mhm’. Sometimes people just needed to be listened to.

Katya continued. “I mean, who gets arrested for asking questions? It’s a load of griffin dung is what it is.”

Again, Nora nodded.

Her employee sighed. “Anyway, she’s home alone, and I think it’s freaking her out a little. Her…” There was a palpable pause before she spoke again. “Parent won’t let her outside alone because, you know. The conformatorium. Wish I could go and help her out, but,” she hefted the baby clothes that she had been rearranging, “you know.”

Well this wouldn’t do. This wouldn’t do at all. If the girl had befriended Katya she was obviously a good kid, and she could see the guilt welling up in her employees face even as she went back to restocking the shelves.

There was a palpable miasma of muddy emotions clodding up her shop, and half of her customers were oracles, this would drive all of them away. Something had to be done.

Nora Oxfoot was not in the daycare business. But. She also wasn’t in the business of losing money. And if she was being honest, she had missed Katya. She didn’t want to send the wayward bard away again just because she felt guilty for not being able to be there for her friend.

“You know,”

Katya perked up.

“I may have a solution to this.”

 

“I can see the resemblance.”

At her remark both Raine and Luz blushed and began to stammer out some sort of response, doing nothing but making the minotaur witch smile brighter. Ever since Katya had started telling Nora about Luz last night, the woman had been enthused to meet her. Something about how she’d known Raine at hexside, and was interested to see what type of a child they would produce.

From the smile that graced her bosses face, Katya was fairly sure that interest had paid off in spades with amusement.

“Luz!”

The girl’s head whipped up at the mention of her name. “Katya!”

Seeing the smile that graced her face made a mirroring grin grow to brighten Katya’s. The pair rushed toward each other, Luz’s arms open wide for a hug.

Katya’s arms were open wide for…another reason.

When they finally crashed into each other, instead of a hug, Katya caught her young friend in a headlock.

“Katya, what?”

“So, thought you could tease me over text, huh?”

Luz was tugging her head against Katya's arms, denying her own trapped nature. “Yes!”

“Finally learning how to tease people, huh?”

The girl kept tugging. “Yup!”

“And completely unrepentant?”

Luz turned her head to look up at her before sticking her tongue out and licking Katya’s arm.

“Ugh, gross!” The maneuver worked though, and as Katya drew her arm away Luz managed to wriggle free with a laugh fit for a goblin.

“Freedom!”

“Not for long you little brat, get back here!”

“Eek!”

A sound from the front of the shop caused both of their heads to whip around. “Please, be careful not to break anything!” called Raine.

What kept the girls looking though was the pile of clothes in Raines hands (near everything Luz had looked at, sans the jump suit) and the intense shade of red on their face.

Luz leaned over toward Katya and put a hand to the side of her mouth to direct what she was saying away from the older pair of witches. “What do you think they’re talking about?”

Almost at the same time as Luz asked the question, Raine smiled, waved, and nearly ran out the door, leaving a look of frustration on Noras face, perhaps even defeat.

“Apparently nothing.”

While the younger girl nodded at her wisdom, Katya took the advantage that Luz’s contemplation offered her and trapped her in another headlock.

“Not gonna get away so easily this time, Whispers!”

“Nooo!”

The laughter that rang through the shop was music to Katya’s ears.

 

Since the morning, Nora had truly put her to work. After she and Katya had run around the entire store, they had been given the entirely fair task of cleaning up after themselves. This had taken a few hours, not because they were particularly rambunctious or trashed the store, no, the actual initial cleaning would have taken about five minutes.

It had taken so long because as customers came into the store they constantly put things back in the wrong places, adding to their workload, and because the pair consistently got back into bickering with each other over anything and everything.

“I just think they look better over here.”

“No, Luz, we have a system and they go here!”

“But if we place them here then they complement the color of these bookcases really nicely!”

“Yes, but if we place them here, then customers can actually find the things they’re looking for all in similar places.”

“Are you suuuuure?”

“Yes.”

Sometimes it seemed that they began to argue on accident.

“Oh hey look, it’s a tambourine like you play!”

“That’s not a tambourine.”

“Katya, it’s literally a ring of wood with cymbals attached.”

“First of all, zills, second of all, a tambourine includes a drum head.”

“It says tambourine on the inside.”

“What? No it- Give me that.”

“See?”

“...Yes.”

“Guess I know your own instrument better than you, huh.”

“Why you little-”

Sometimes, it seemed to Luz that Katya was just looking to start an argument.

“You know, I just don’t see the appeal.”

“What!?”

“I know it’s a good book series, but I don’t know, a lot of the tropes feel played out.”

“What do you mean played out!? It’s a masterpiece of intertwining character arcs with dramatic theming!”

“Luz, it’s just another story where humans misinterpret what magic is.”

“Just another story!?”

Needless to say, her day had been anything but boring, and she needed fuel. Luckily, her O’pa had given her just the thing. As Luz bit into a home made sandwich that tasted almost as good as what her mama had made back home, the woman who had so kindly let her spend the day in her store piped up.

“So.”

Luz looked up from her lunch. At some point, it seemed that both Nora and Katya had joined her for lunch, and she only hadn’t noticed because she was so thoroughly engrossed in eating the food before her. Nora had chosen the wrong moment to begin a question, because all that Luz could respond with after the bite she had taken was a muffled ‘hmmhm?’

“You know, I spent a lot of time in the same classrooms as your O’pa when we were back in hexside.”

She nodded as she continued attempting to chew and swallow the bite she had taken a moment before Nora and Katya had sat down.

“And like I already said, I can see the resemblance. You’re a Whispers, through and through.”

Luz nodded again, this time faster. Yes. Of course she was. What else could she be, right? She was sure her nodding was totally and completely convincing and didn’t seem at all frantic, forced, or worried! Katya’s pitying look in the background was definitely just another facet of her teasing Luz, and was definitely not from her nodding being unconvincing! She could lie, she could totally lie! Just watch, Katya. She’d be the best liar the Boiling Isles had ever seen.

Finally, the girl finished her bite and painfully swallowed an amount of food she probably should have chewed for a longer period of time. “Yes! Yup, that’s me, Luz Whispers.”

She finished this statement with a bright grin and a thumbs up.

Behind Nora, she could see Katya put her palm to her face again.

The minotaur witch sitting in front of her smiled, the smile of someone who knows something, or is about to watch something very funny. “Oh, definitely. A strong resemblance. I was curious though.”

The pause left just enough room for Luz to tilt her head to the side.

“About the other side of your family. I can’t quite seem to pin it down.”

Luz felt her eyes widen, and her heart stop. They hadn’t come up with a story for this. Could she say she didn’t know? Could she make something up? She didn’t know enough about her O’pas past to make something up! Nora was going to find her out, and then she would know that Luz was a human, and then who knew what would happen!? Sure she seemed nice now, but so had the demon she had asked questions to that had called the coven guard on her! He was just a sweet cute little yellow pig guy and then she was getting taken away by the guards!

An awkward laugh came from behind Nora as Katya walked forward to put a hand on Luz’s shoulder. “Yeah, Raine broke up with her before Luz was born, and doesn’t really seem to like talking about her either. Some kind of history that still makes it painful, you know?”

Nora nodded, and Luz was relieved to see that she bought it. “Ah, a lost love, hm?”

And then Katya ran with it. She sighed before she spoke again. “I mean, I’ve never seen them date anyone since. Must’ve been a real broken heart situation.”

The rest of their lunch passed in a not quite awkward quiet, but the rest of the day passed with ridiculous bustle. Customer after customer after customer, each and every one putting the shop out of order. She was run ragged, and at the end of the day she received a pitying look from Nora, coupled with a sack of snails and a ‘All of my employees get paid dear, thank you for your help today.’

While she was still surprised that she was apparently an employee now, Raine walked into the store. They gave Luz a hug before asking “So, how did it work out?”

She thought back on her day, on the antics she and Katya had gotten up to, on the lunch conversation that she couldn’t quite remember thanks to the afternoon rush, and on her pockets, not a whole sack of snails heavier.

“It went great!”

Chapter 8: Juke Box Hero (Got Stars in her Eyes)

Notes:

Here you go!! I figured you all deserved a slightly early chapter, so, happy Friday!

“So you have everything?”

“Yes!”

“And you’re sure you want to do this?”

“Yes definitely!”

“You’re comfortable calling me O’pa? We need to sell the lie.”

This time there was a pause before Luz responded. “What do you mean lie, O’pa?”

While the attempt was admirable, the look of giddy glee covering Luz’s face was more than enough to clue anyone into the fact that something was going on. They wouldn't necessarily guess what, but they would guess something.

Katya was right, this girl couldn’t lie to save her own life.

Raine held back a grimace, but from Luz’s reaction they were fairly sure she saw.

“No no I promise I can do this! Good Fortunes is having a rush today, Amber’s hung over and Derwin is still exhausted from his recital, and I don’t want to be home alone again! I know how you feel about the Bard Coven, but I can do this, I can totally do this.”

She passed a hand over her face, and when the pass was complete, the look she wore behind it was a combination of casual and serious.

“Luz Whispers, a magicless witch who’s bile sac was stolen at birth by a party of pirates from beyond the isles,” she swept on hand through the air in front of her, adding some drama to her story.

“On a quest to reclaim her power,” her eyes narrowed, and her fist clenched beneath her chin.

“No matter what stands in her way.”

They clapped at the performance, startling Luz out of whatever trance she was in. The girl blinked owlishly at them while they smiled. “Bravo, bravo! An excellent story!”

The human beamed at the praise.

It was unfortunate that it would only last a moment.

“Unfortunately, not a story we can use.”

Luz deflated, bending over with a pronounced “Awww.”

Raine offered a sympathetic smile, and their hand came down lightly to rub Luz’s back. “Hey, don’t look so down. Creativity is a great thing, and honestly I wish we could go with the story. But, we need something believable, otherwise people will start poking holes in it, and you’ll be found out.”

She continued looking down, not yet meeting their eyes. “I know, I know, it’s just…it's boring, you know?” Her face rose and her eyes met theirs. Oh Titan, those were puppy dog eyes, resist Whispers, resist!

For a moment, they thought they might fail. But the BATTs had prepared them for this, and they had years of experience dealing with this particular tactic.

With a successful resistance and a heavy heart, they sighed sadly. “Sorry Luz, we have to do what’s going to keep you safe.”

Luz, in answer, kicked her foot on the floor. “Luz Whispers, a sheltered witch with rounded lobe syndrome and no magic, kept secret for her own safety.”

Well, this wouldn’t do. This wouldn’t do at all.

What could they do to make this more interesting…

“Welllllll…”

Come on idea, come on. They knew it was in there, they were a bard. Weaving stories and music was literally their job, they could do this.

Luz looked up at them expectantly.

Luz. Human. From the human realm. Barely knows the boiling isles, asks a lot of questions about them. Was thrown in the conformatorium for questions.

Was thrown in the conformatorium!

Raine grinned as they met Luz’s eyes again. “We’re going to need some kind of story if anyone from the conformatorium sees you.”

The human's face fell, and one of her hands rose to grasp the opposing arm. “Oh, yeah, I guess we would.”

Mentally, Raine had slapped themself in the face nearly a dozen times already. But they couldn’t allow their brittle smile to crack, not when they were this close!

“So I was thinking,” Yes, good, already Luz was looking back at them! “What if you were framed?”

Luz’s mouth opened into a wide circle before slowly morphing into a gigantic grin. “Yes! I had left the house one day, snuck out, because I was tired of being cooped up,” she was crouching down, arms spread to the sides and eyes suspiciously narrowed, flicking back and forth.

“But since I was so sheltered, I was completely ignorant to the ways of the world!” One of her hands raised dramatically, its back barely reaching her slightly turned forehead, in the classic fainting position.

At this point, Raine chimed in. “It was at this point that my enemies set a plan in motion to capture you and blackmail me, but their plan backfired!”

Luz was nodding along excitedly. “They were nearly arrested, but they got away scot free while I was left to face the consequences of their actions!”

The bard was grinning wide as they continued the story. “Eventually they tried to kidnap you, but you used that as an opportunity to escape!”

“And I managed to barely find my way back home!”

“Now I’m not comfortable leaving you home alone, so until we find some kind of protection for you, you’ll either be with me, or someone we trust.”

Luz’s eyes narrowed once more, and she lowered her voice, “Lest the kidnappers strike again…”

 

Millicent Rile was relatively happy with her job most days of the week. She was a receptionist, sitting in the waiting room of her boss, staring at empty seats, taking reports, and passing them on. It wasn't everything she wanted, not by a long shot, and it wasn't where she thought she would end up, but it wasn't too hard, it paid well enough, and it was at least mildly connected to her passions.

Ever since her days at Glandus, Millicent had struggled to play the accordion. She wasn't good at it, some would even say she was bad, but even at fifty five years old she hadn't given up.

She'd made it into the bard coven.

She'd continued to practice.

She'd even gone to a recital or two to show off her stuff, though she had been booed off the stage.

Still, her songs came out in jittering starts as she struggled to remember the notes, her spells fizzled, and her instrument fought her every step of the way.

No surprise really, the accordion was nearly the same height as she was.

Music was her passion, and even as terrible as she was at creating it, she wouldn't give up.

The coven system had its detractors, had its proponents, even had those who were ambivalent about the whole thing, but if there was one good thing about it, it was the bard coven.

Half the reason she had never given up was the non-stop encouragement from her fellow musicians. Their desire to see her succeed, their applause at her every advancement. The bard coven was a bright spot in an otherwise dark world.

This was why Millicent was happy with her job.

Sure, she wasn't a professional musician, or one of the higher ups in the coven like she had dreamed of, but she was somewhere that dreams came to life. And if she couldn't make it, at least she could see someone else succeed.

It was at this job, on this fateful afternoon, that Millicent saw her boss walk into the office accompanied by someone she had never seen before.

"Oh, Mx.Whispers thank goodness you're here! We have a stack of orchestral approvals from the Lefthand Troupe, the healing coven is asking for our branch's assistance with some kind of catastrophe downtown, and Brett found a cursed instrument again."

Her boss rolled their eyes and let out an "Ugh." Before turning to the child next to them. "Luz, I have to go take care of this before Brett ends up cursing the whole building again, can you stay here for now? It shouldn't be more than a few minutes."

The child waved their hand back and forth in a display of clearly forced casualness. "Psh, yeah, I'll be fine O'pa." She paused for a moment. "Can I come with you to see the curse?"

O'pa? No, no she couldn't be…

Raine grimaced before responding. "Maybe next time, when we actually know what the curse is. This time, we have to-"

The girl sighed. "I know, I know, we have to keep me safe." There was a momentary pause. "Dangit."

Millicents boss smiled again. "Thank you Luz."

It had looked like Raine was going to say more, but there was a crash deeper into the building, causing all three of them to glance up.

A strained look passed between Raine and Luz, before the child nodded and Raine ran off.

She looked around for a moment, before her eyes landed on Millicent. "Oh, hello! I um, forgot you were there for a moment."

Millicent chuckled before responding. "Oh that's fine sweetheart, just fine! I'm Millicent Rile, but you can call me Millie. Mx.Whispers receptionist." She held out a hand. "It's wonderful to meet you."

While the hesitation lasted only a moment, it was long enough for Millie to notice. A hint of fear, perhaps? Trepidation?

Regardless, the girl reached out and grasped her hand. "I’m Luz, uh, Luz Whispers." Her hand was quickly taken back after the shaking of the hand, not quite shaking, but something similar.

She would have to ask Raine if their parents had stage fright, because it appeared to run in the family.

Millie gave her best 'I'm-just-an-old-lady' smile and let out a little laugh. "Oh don't worry Raindrop, I don't bite!"

The young girl started shaking her head. "Oh, I didn't think you did, I just,"

She took pity on the girl and decided to pick up the thread of conversation herself. "Relax, relax, you're fine." She gave it a moment, letting the kid settle.

"So," Luz looked up at her, "you're Mx.Whispers kid, huh? Have to say, not the twist I saw coming. Where have you been the past…" She looked the kid up and down, trying to make a guess.

"Fifteen?" There was a small twitch.

"Fourteen years?"

A look of slight amazement overcame Luz's features before she started trying to stutter out an answer. "Oh, well, I, you see,"

An embarrassed flush was overcoming the poor girl's features, and eventually she just turned her head to the side and gestured to her ears.

Millie's eyes widened before she got herself under control. That was nearly as good a reason to keep someone hidden as she could come up with.

The isles were dangerous enough, but navigating them without magic? She couldn't imagine.

Having had some level of good parenting, Millie wasn't one to pity others, but she could show some compassion. "Ah, Rounded Lobe Syndrome. I take it you got the whole shebang?"

The kid nodded, still embarrassed. Millie could remember what it was like to be fourteen, and how cruel other children could be. Stunted ears, no magic, an odd second lung. Heck, it took a professional healer to tell kids with RLS apart from basic humans on a good day. She privately thanked Raine for keeping this kid from the wider world for so long. It would have chewed her up and spat her out.

Millie nodded in return. "Ah, I see. My cousin had the same thing." He had retained his bile sac, but it was still rough growing up.

Luz sighed before she could finish her statement. "Yeah."

She was probably about to continue, but Millie was having none of that now. Better to distract from the issue. "So, if you don't mind my asking, why did you end up joining your O'pa today?"

"Oh, well, I got kinda… framed? We're not even sure who did it, but with O'pa about to be the head of the coven, and me not having magic…"

The trailing off and downcast look was more than enough for her to gather the rest of the context.

Well, this wasn't going well. She was curious, sure, but making a kid cry was way further than she ever wanted to go.

Standing up and walking to the entrance of the waiting room, Millie poked her head out the door and did a quick glance up and down the hallway. Seeing nobody, she re-entered the room Luz was sitting in.

Tip toeing over to the girl was required to properly sell what was about to happen.

"So," she whispered, before leaning in close and getting a wide grin on her face. "You want a no holds barred tour of the bard coven?"

The girl's eyes widened. "Yes!"

Perfect.

 

The tour wasn’t quite what Luz was expecting if she was being honest. In a bard coven, one might see fancy instruments, amazing concert halls, beautiful performances. Amazing, magical musical talent on full display.

Instead, almost the entirety of it was bureaucratic.

“And this is where we file requests for songs to receive sheet music approval.”

“You need approval for sheet music?”

Millie chuckled. “Well of course, we can’t just have people making up songs willy nilly, oh, can you imagine the chaos?” The old woman winked and rolled her eyes. “Ooooh, scary songs coming to get you.”

Was she… she wasn’t really saying.

The older woman laughed again before lightly elbowing Luz. “I’m kidding kiddo, I wish we could create willy nilly, but, the times are the times.”

“Isn’t that, but, isn’t that against the law?” Raine had given her a primer on the rules on the boiling isles, and how oddly strict they were in some places while being lax in another. Expressing disagreement with the laws was a rather large crime.

Millie looked back at her and raised one eyebrow.

The pair stood still for a moment, some unknowable agreement passing between the two before Millie continued the tour.

“And in this room, we shred the sheet music that’s out of print.”

The tour continued throughout the complex, making Luz realize more and more that the blood and bones of the bard coven were made, apparently, out of paperwork. She didn’t see a single person playing an instrument, heck, she only saw two instruments.

It seemed that the whole coven was people bent over desks filling out papers.

Apparently her disappointment was visible, because the next time Millie glanced back at her, she wore a wicked grin. “Oh, don’t worry, Raindrop. I saved the best for last.”

She lit up a torch, and let Luz down a hallway, just as beige as the rest but twice as dusty. Halfway down there sat a door, one that looked like it hadn't been used in years.

Millie turned to face her. “Are you ready, little whisper, for a room filled with unspeakable horrors!?” Her eyes had widened with the end of her statement, and with them her voice had increased in volume.

Luz was nodding furiously. Finally, something interesting! Something that wasn’t another step of paperwork! She was practically squealing with joy!

“Ha, too bad!”

Throwing open the door in front of her, Millie revealed a room that was, that was…well it was filled with old instruments.

She looked over at Millie and frowned while she laughed. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, it was just too good an opportunity to pass up.” The receptionist wiped tears from her eyes before continuing. “It may not be filled with ancient horrors, but it is still an interesting room, come on.”

With a gesture, she let Luz into a poorly lit room, and let the girl go ahead of her to look around. While the room itself was bathed in shadow, the impression of what was on the walls could barely be made out as… instruments? Maybe?

"You know,” Millie said from her position by the door, “You don't need to use magic to play an instrument."

Luz turned around to look at the older woman, who was suspiciously not looking in her direction.

She felt her shoulders sag. "I know, I know, but without it just feels… hollow."

The old woman tisked. "Raindrop, music isn't hollow without magic. And just because music has magic doesn't make it full. Music, art, it's an essential part of life."

Her feet started shuffling unbidden as she glanced back into the room Millie had taken her. It was filled with odd instruments. Things that she had really no idea what she'd do with, and the occasional barely recognizable shape. "I just, I really don't think music is for me."

"What, are you afraid you're gonna break something?"

"Is it okay if I just don't want to?" She had always been creative, an artist, a storyteller, a costume maker. But music has never been her forte. It required too much hand eye coordination, and she had never had the patience to learn an instrument.

Behind her there was a rustling sound, something hitting wood, something hitting metal, and a triumphant "Ah-hah!"

Standing atop a heap of trash, there was Millie. In her arms was what had to be the oddest thing Luz had ever seen.

The receptionist turned tour guide began walking toward her, allowing the strap of the instrument to rest over her shoulder.

"Here. Try this, just once, and I promise I'll stop bothering you about it." She held out what Luz had some to realize was some kind of heavily modified electric guitar.

Someone had built amps into the body, making the whole thing just a bit thicker and heavier, and coming off the top was a hand crank with a multitude of buttons and dials along the edge. Volume, bass, treble, reverb, just to name a few.

"I, I'm not sure-"

Luz was backing away, but Millie seemed to be unstoppable. "I got it from the trash pile, Raindrop, a whole pile of broken or unusable instruments. I promise, it's fine, nothings going to happen."

Even as the older woman was speaking, she was lowering the things strap over Luz's neck.

It sat comfortable on Luz's midsection, her left hand finding its neck and her right finding a strumming position easily enough. It felt good, almost warm.

She looked over at Millie, who was giving encouraging nods and two thumbs up. "Just one strum, and then we can go!"

Deep breath in, deep breath out. One strum, it wasn't like she could break anything by plucking a few strings.

Luz reached down and plucked a single, out of tune, D string.

Rushing from her body, a wave of opaque pinkish energy flowed over the room. All that she could hear was the reverberation of the string, all that she could feel was the heat of the moment, the passion, the sound. Her hair felt like it was underwater, floating, and looking down she noticed her feet had left the ground.

All around her, the instruments that had been attached to the walls floated, glowing, moving, but none making a sound, just orbiting her. A few in the broken pile seemed to be fixing themselves.

In front of her, there was Millie, mouth agape. Behind Millie there was a rush at the door as more and more bards gathered to stare, eventually being joined by a rushing Raine.

"O'pa look!" She yelled, too overwhelmed with the realization to process the dumbfounded look on the face of her guardian. "I can do magic!"

Chapter 9: Smells Like Teen Spirit

Notes:

With Christmas coming up, I figured a lot of us would be busy this Saturday, so congrats!! I'm giving you all one present a few days early! I won't be posting anything on Christmas, so expect the next update of The True Lives of the Fabulous BATTs to occur on the first Saturday of the new year, January 1st.

With a new semester about to begin, Hieronymus Bump was a busy witch.

The new potions teacher wasn’t who he’d wanted to get, although his ideal candidate was unlikely to ever join anyways. Didn’t mean he’d ever stop trying. One day, he would see that woman as a teacher. He’d known she’d had the spark for it since she’d been a student.

That wasn’t to say that Mr.Sylen was a bad potions teacher. He knew his stuff, and the kids liked him. Maybe he was a little too easy on them, let them get away with a little too much, but, eh, nobody is perfect.

After a momentous last season, the grudgy field was still being cleaned up. They’d just managed to replace the bleachers, having been broken to pieces over the course of the season, not that he was in a hurry to get that finished. They had been the guest bleachers, and he’d been looking forward to making those Glandus brats stand.

Once the bleachers had been replaced, the pitch had been turned over, and the lines redrawn with new binding spells from the sports coven. They should last for a few years, but knowing his students, he doubted it.

There was a stack of lesson plans for him to approve, field trip requests for him to sign off on, and a budget analysis to complete. He loved teaching, but this was by far his least favorite part. Ugh. Administrating. Was it too much to ask for him to just help shape the minds of the future, and not the budgets of the now?

A welcome knock came at his door.

His receptionist poked their head in, an unreadable look on their face. “Principal Bump? Do you have a moment?”

‘Have a moment’, ha, if it would take him away from budget analysis he had a lifetime. He sighed. “I suppose I can make some time, Taylor. What do you need me for?”

Said receptionist took a moment to look out the door. “There’s a parent here with their kid who wants to talk about enrolling her.”

Normally he would require an appointment, but at this point he would do anything to escape the budget, even violate his own rules. Save paperwork for later, possible interesting new student now. Who knows, maybe she’d like grudgy.

He waved a hand. “Alright, send them in.”

Taylor quirked an eyebrow in confusion. “Sir, are you sure? They don’t have any kind of appointment.”

Bump simply nodded. “Children are our future, Taylor,” and great entertainment. “Sometimes exceptions must be made to protect that future.”

They shot him one more confused look, but exited the room. He took the moment he had to clear off his desk (sweeping the whole pile into an open drawer without organizing it. He would come back to it later) and arrange the office just a little to make it look spick and span.

The first to enter the office was a face he recognized, but not one he’d expected to see anytime soon, if ever. Oh sure, when they were younger he’d thought that they would be back in about fifteen years with a whole brood of toddlers, but Bump kept tabs on his students, and he’d been amongst the first to know that Raine and Eda had finally fallen apart.

That curse was a really terrible thing.

Somehow seeing the bard again did not prepare Bump for what came next.

Into their office walked a… thirteen? No, fourteen year old girl who looked…well, she looked almost exactly how he had expected the Whispers child would look, all those years ago when Raine was still with Eda.

She took off the strangely shaped backpack she was wearing as she found her seat, setting it to the side as she looked around his office. Observant, that was always good in a student.

How had they managed to keep her a secret for so long? Why?

Were they secretly still with Eda?

Was this child the reason behind their break up?

As these questions flashed through Bump’s mind, the pair got settled. Neither would quite look him in the eyes, and both were already fidgeting.

He coughed.

When they both jumped at once and looked over to meet him in the eyes he had to hold back a laugh. “Hello Mx.Whispers, it has been quite a while since you graced these halls with your presence. What brings you in today?”

It wasn’t like he didn’t know, but starting with something obvious had always tended to put Whispers into a better place to respond. Gave them a foundation to start off of.

They blinked before coming back to the moment, and Bump could see that tension ease from their shoulders. That’s right Whispers, there’s nobody here but me and your daughter, you don’t have to perform for anyone, and you know what you’re here for. Be that confident person you are underneath all that anxiety!

Raine leaned forward, adopting a smirk as they clasped their hands in front of their face. “Heironymus, I would have assumed that was obvious.”

A muffled snort came from the girl next to Raine, who had followed her O’pa’s lead and was now also looking toward Bump. Ah, so that was how it was going to be? Well, two could play at that game, Whispers.

“Ah, so you finally decided to accept my offer?”

“What?”

Bump was out of his chair, one hand forward in a beckoning motion.

“I’m glad you’ve come to your senses, I always knew you would make a better teacher than administrator.”

“That’s not why I’m-”

One of Bump's hands came to Raine’s shoulder, guiding them toward the door.

“Now, let me show you to your classroom, I’m sure you’ll be eager to meet all your new students.”

The look of horror that came to the bards face almost made Bump feel a twinge of guilt. Almost.

Their feet stamped firm on the ground, stopping any forward momentum. “Buuuump, you know that’s not why I’m here!”

Ah yes, the Whispers whine. They had used it to get out of many a punishment before Bump had grown an immunity. But this time, and this time alone, he was willing to indulge. He went back towards his desk with a laugh. “Don’t dish it out if you can’t take it, Whispers!”

Raine sat down with a grumble. Arms crossed. “Duly noted.”

It probably didn’t help that their daughter was now giggling even harder.

Bump turned to the young girl and clapped his hands together. “So, you want to join Hexside! I must say, it’s a good choice. We have everything a young witch needs for their education, from classroom to Grudgby field!” He ended his speech with his arms spread wide. “Now come on, do you want the tour?”

“Yes!” Yelled one mouth.

Surliness was expected. Bitterness. Raine Whispers was someone who held one heck of a grudge, against anyone and everyone from what Bump had seen.

They didn’t let things go. They held onto them, deep inside, until they could extract vengeance. It was a trait they had shared with their erstwhile paramour, and the pair had made many of their less kind peers regret ever setting eyes on Lilith. You don’t mess with the sister of Eda and the best friend of Raine without some consequences.

Sure, the bard was obviously a kind parent, but Bump had really expected something of a grumble. Some level of anger.

Instead, they simply had a calm smile over their face. “Sure, where do you want to see first, Raindrop?”

Seeing his students grow was one of his favorite parts of being a teacher. Some of them he never got to see again after they graduated, some he did, much to his dismay, and the hopes he had for those students was crushed upon seeing who they had become. But, rarely, Bump got the wonderful treat of seeing someone like Raine. A troublemaker with so much potential who had turned into a skilled witch, a savvy coven member, and as far as he could see, an amazing parent.

As their child began to rant about all the things she had seen coming into the building, Raine smiled down at her and nodded along. Bump had been planning to lead the tour, but he was more than comfortable answering questions as a possible, dare he say probable, new student led the way.

 

“Well, that’s the whole school. What did you think, Whispers, still want your daughter to go here?”

The bard smiled back at Bump before turning to their right and looking down at a child still vibrating with excitement. “I’d say that’s up to her, but, it looks like your mind is already made up, isn’t it, raindrop?”

Said child turned her head swiftly toward her parent before letting out a shrill “Yes!” She covered her mouth with her hands before speaking again. “I mean, yes, I, yeah, school!”

“Well!” Bump clapped his hands together. “That only leaves the entrance exam. We have some openings later this week, orrr…”

Neither Whispers was meeting his eyes. Raine was looking out the window, sucking air between their teeth and scratching the back of their head. Luz was doing… actually the exact same gesture but looking down to her left.

Bump felt his eyelids lower into the tired face of an administrator who knew there was some kind of annoying problem coming. “Alright, out with it. What’s the hold up?”

Both of them started speaking at the same time.

“Well, you see-”

“I have-”

“Oh, you can-”

“No, you’re good at-”

This continued as Bump pinched his nose between his fingers. It had been going so well. “Whatever the problem is, we can deal with it faster if you just tell me.”

There was another moment of silence.

Bump raised his eyebrow, and waited. An oldie but a goodie, and a tactic that had even once gotten a confession out of Edalyn Clawthorne.

“I-” The girl spoke, before sighing and brushing her hair behind her ears. Oh. “I can’t do magic. At least, we thought I couldn’t, but then I found this!” She swung the odd looking backpack she’d been wearing the whole day around, unzipping it to pull out some odd monstrosity of an instrument.

He could recognize that it has strings well enough, but the levers, cranks, dials and buttons were all something new to him.

“What on all the Titan is that?”

“It’s a guitar!” She said with a grin.

“That looks nothing like any guitar I have ever seen.”

Her voice got a little quieter as she shrank back. “Well, it’s from the human realm.”

“Hm.” He waited a moment for more commentary. “Go on.”

She nodded. “I can’t make spell circles or anything, because, well, uh.” She gestured vaguely, and he just nodded.

“I know what RLS is, Miss Whispers.”

“Haha, yeah.” She blushed, looking down. He could see her psyching herself back up in her mind, forcing herself to be excited again. It was something to behold, the change from awkward and self conscious to confident, or at least determined. Another good trait in a student!

“So!” She fixed him with a look. “I can, sort of do magic now? But I don’t know any spells.”

Bump hummed as he put away the paperwork he had been working on and pulled out another set. “Well, we have a class for beginners that should be able to show you the-”

A hand came down on the paperwork before he’d even put it on the table. He looked up, and suddenly remembered that Raine was still in the room. They faced him with a hard green stare, and shook their head ever so slightly. “She’s not going in the baby class, Heironymus.”

He raised an eyebrow. “You may be high up in your coven, Mx.Whispers, but here I make the rules,” He pushed the paperwork under Raine’s hand forward, “and they will be followed.”

Raine was already shaking their head. “No, you don’t get it, Luz is-”

He sighed. “I know, your kid is special, your kid needs special treatment, I hear the same story every day. If I give one student special treatment, I have to give them all special treatment, Whispers. You know I can’t do that.”

They were already shaking their head. “No, this is different, this is.” They shook one hand in a circle, trying to find the words and obviously failing. “She needs to be taught differently!”

Bump was pinching the bridge of his nose again. “Mx.Whispers, if this is so important to you, why don’t you simply teach her two bard spells and come back in a week or two, however long it takes?”

There, problem solved. He had never taken Raine to be one of those parents, but kids bring out something different in everyone.

“They can’t!”

The message was blurted out by the girl who had been there to watch the argument unfold. Her odd guitar strapped over her shoulder and gripped in her hands.

“We tried, and I just, I keep wrecking things before I can even learn anything, and we don’t know what to do!”

Raine was standing stoic now, having backed off of Bumps desk to allow their daughter to speak.

“What do you mean wreck everything?”

The girl, much like her parent, struggled to find words before apparently opting for a demonstration. Bump watched calmly as her hands reached to strum the strings, only surprised when Raine’s hands came quickly to stop her. “Not inside!”

A moment later the three of them were outside, standing in the center of the Grudgby field. If nothing else, Bump would have a very entertaining story to tell the rest of the staff. It was always fun to talk about ridiculous parents after they were gone.

He waved his hand, face held in a nonplussed expression. He wasn’t expecting much. The same basic bard magic as always, maybe a little shinier, a little stronger. Nothing to write home about.

The Whispers arranged themselves carefully. You know, he had really had higher hopes for Raine. Well, sure they were about to be the head of the bard coven, and that was amazing, but as a parent, this level of arrogance about the ability of their child, it bordered close to Odalia. Ugh. He hoped this wasn’t another situation where a parent had pushed their child too far too fast end ended up messing with their bile sac.

He really didn’t think Raine would have done that, but the coven system changes people. And not often for the better.

“You ready, Raindrop?”

Luz blushed again before nodding, turning so that she was facing the opposing bleachers, and holding down what he could vaguely recognize as a sloppy power chord. She looked back toward him.

“Um, do you care much about these bleachers?”

He laughed before responding. “By all means, blow them away. Any excuse to make those Glandus snots stand!” Heh, wouldn’t that be a sight, one spell damaging the bleachers. Those things were made of Titan bone!

Bump watched as the girl took a deep breath, raised her right arm, and brought it down in a dramatic strum.

It was like watching a star being born.

Light poured out of her in every direction, but luckily mostly in the direction her guitar was facing. Its speed was extraordinary, and he felt the weight of it wash over him like a crashing wave. If not for Frewins timely intervention sticking his tail out, he would have fallen over backwards.

From the sound of a low ‘oof’ nearby, Raine actually had fallen over backwards!

In front of Luz, he could see that the wave of energy was anything but reduced, it may have been multiplied ten, twenty times the power he received.

The bleachers had been blown with such force that he was forced to watch them shatter on the trees of the forest ahead of the Whispers child, and then watch some of those trees be blown over.

Eventually his inability to move ended, but only when Luz brough the palm of her hand down on the strings, silencing them.

It was funny, he hadn’t noticed that she’d been floating until that moment.

He watched as she rushed over to help up her chuckling O’pa before the pair turned to him.

Raine was the first to speak. “I’ve tried to teach her, but every time we even start it’s just… that. We can’t get anywhere with it because she can’t even play a single note, let alone practice. Now do you see what I mean?”

What Raine said mattered little to Heironymus Bump, as his mind was elsewhere. Visions were dancing through his head, visions of trophies, championship games, and opposing teams blown square out of the arena by this powerhouse.

And if he didn’t accept her as a student now…

Those visions twisted and he saw the same girl on the other side of the field, wearing Glandus colors, and decimating the Harpies!

This was a future he could not allow to pass.

“Good news! You’re in!”

The excited squeal that came from Luz Whispers, soon to be champion of the Grudgby field was near high pitched enough to deafen him. “Thank you thank you thank you!”

He held out an arm, catching the child's face and preventing what was obviously going to be a full on tackled hug. “There will be conditions.”

By this point Raine had managed to make it over, their arms crossed and their eyes narrowed. “What kind of ‘conditions’?”

Bump tried to look casual, looking down at his fingernails as he talked. He could see Raine nodding along as he talked. “Oh, this and that. Keeping grades up, some kind of time limit by which she will have to actually know a spell,”

He paused.

“Required extracurricular activities.”

Both Whispers spoke at the same time.

“What!?”

He chuckled. Their surprise was evident, but he had seen how excited the child was. “Oh come one Raine, it’s, you know, team building or whatever. See you tomorrow for your first day at Hexside!”

Bump walked away before either could respond, cackling gleefully to himself. This year, and the next four, those grudgy trophies were all his.

Notes:

Thank you all for reading, and thank you all for your comments! The comments section is what keeps this fic going, and always makes me smile!

Chapter 10: Welcome to the Jungle

Notes:

Oof, I am sorry it took me so long! I got pretty sick in late December for a few days, and then work was so busy that all my motivation was GONE. Thank you all for being patient with me, and leaving the comments to motivate me to continue, it means the world ^-^.
The next few chapters will probably be spaced out to every two weeks while I get back into the swing of things, but I think I can safely say The True Lives of the Fabulous BATTs should start updating again regularly!

‘Ping!’

A hand fumbled out from under a pile of blankets, smacking itself uselessly against a bedside table.

‘Ping!’

“Mrph!”

The same hand was joined by a second in pulling a pillow over an already covered by blankets head.

‘Ping!’

Said pillow was thrown off to reveal a twenty two year old witch with bloodshot eyes! She scanned the room, teeth grit and hands held in fists by her side. While Katya didn’t know who was hexting her at six in the morning, she knew that they would pay.

‘Ping!’

With that sound, her eyes zeroed in on her scroll, balanced precariously on the side of her desk across the room. Another offense, this person was forcing her to leave the bed! She was warm, comfortable, and resting, but no. Noooo, somebody just haaaad to get her attention.

The bard gathered her blankets around herself as she prepared to leave the confines of her mattress.

“Texting me at six in the morning,”

Her feet found the slippers that she kept by her bedside, specifically for the cold mornings her apartment seemed to have even in the depths of summer.

“Forcing me to get out of bed,”

She began to stomp toward her desk, frustration fueling her fury until some strange inverse of her knock sounded below her.

The sound came again, associated with a yell. “Some of us are trying to sleep!”

Katya could have been a good neighbor, but, well. She was grumpy. And Randall was a jerk anyway.

A small smile graced her face as she made sure to stomp harder and more frequently on her way to the phone, ignoring the cries of the demon hunter that roomed underneath her.

Served him right for being a jerk.

Eventually, she made it past the discarded clothing and odd tambourine part to reach her desk, and with it, the offender.

The swearing that was coming from beneath her would not compare in the least to the storm she was about to send this person's way.

Unknown Number : Katya!!!!

Unknown Number : I have a phone now!!! :) :) :)

Unknown Number : And I got into Hexside!!!

Unknown Number : Katyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

If anyone had been able to see Katya’s face, illuminated as it was beneath the hood formed by her largest comforter, they would have described something akin to a confused grimace. One eyebrow raised, mouth slightly open in something next door to a snarl, and eyes thoroughly wide.

There was nobody she would think of who would have her number and hext like this.

Amber was surprisingly to the point when hexting, preferring to talk over the message based conversation, for reasons Katya continued to find unfathomable.

Derwin sent long paragraphs of text, and always waited for her to respond before sending any more.

Raine, well. They ended every hext with ‘-Raine’, and they talked like they were writing a letter, so it definitely wasn’t them.

In the early morning and with her brain not working at full capacity, Katya sent back the only thing she could think of.

Me : why r u wkingme up so erly

There may have been a few typos, but she felt that the point got across.

A small bubble appeared in the lower left of her scroll, indicating a reply was coming soon. She looked to the top of her scroll, the ‘do not disturb’ button enticing her with its wiles. She looked back to her bed, and thought of her schedule for the day.

If she went to sleep now, she could sleep for two more hours before showing up to Noras shop. But, from Raines ranting about proper sleep schedules she knew very well that thanks to a witches natural sleep cycle, she would just be making herself MORE tired for the day, regardless of how good it would feel to go back to sleep.

The bard narrowed her eyes at the memory of that particular tidbit. Raine. Raine and their tendency to act like a slitherbeast around slitherlings whenever they were around her and the other BATTs. They were adults!

 

Before her mind could take her down that well worn rant, she received a sudden and still unwelcome distraction.

‘Ping!’

Unknown Number : Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry! I just got so excited, because, you know, new world, new school, I can actually do some magic even if I’m not good at it, and I just, blugh. Sorry Katya.

Her eyebrow rose again at the contents of this new message. Who in the world? Actually can do magic? What was?

When her mind finally caught up with reality, her second eyebrow shot up to join the first.

Me : You cann do magic now??? Wjat how!?

While waiting for a response from someone who was probably Luz, but not definitely, Katya updated the contact information in her scroll. If she didn’t, she would lose this number in an instant. She knew herself well enough for that.

As she finished updating the name of whoever was texting her, who was almost definitely the little human she’d met… wow, only a few weeks ago, another message came through.

Luz (Probably) : I don’t know!! But I can!!!!! We were touring the bard coven local headquarters, and Millie gave me a guitar, and then I just played!

Me : Ah, so you chose the correct track.

Luz (Probably) : I mean, it’s the only form of magic I CAN do, so, it’s not really like I was going to do anything else.

Katya looked back at her clock. Only two minutes had passed since she began hexting with Luz, so she still had nearly two hours before she would have woken up, meaning she had about two and a half hours before she had to go to work.

She could work with that.

Me : Hey Luz, do you have a penstagram yet?

Luz (Probably) : No!! Raine just gave me the scroll, and when we put in your number and the other BATTs I realized I hadn’t told you I was going to be going to Hexside, and then I realized that I hadn’t told you about me being able to do magic, and now I have to learn how to play the guitar, but every time I DO the magic comes out like a TIDAL WAVE and I can barely even control it so we’re hoping that someone at Hexside can help me figure that out and then maybe after I can learn more from Raine!

The response finally proving her suspicion correct, Katya changed Luz’s name in her phone again.

Me : Okay hear me out.

Shrimpicus Maximus : ?

Me : Make a Penstagram…

Me : And THEN…

Me : Post a video of you doing magic.

Shrimpicus Maximus : Uh… okaaay, but why?

Me : People on the aetherweave love figuring out weird stuff, especially on seenthat. If your video gains any traction, someone will be commenting by -

Katya stopped typing. While yes, this was a good idea to figure out how Luz was doing magic, it also carried other consequences. People could be… She shivered. Yeah. No. She wasn’t throwing Luz into that particular snake-pit.

Me : On second thought, maybe don’t. But this is so cool! Do you have your schedule yet?

Shrimpicus Maximus : …

Shrimpicus Maximus : Oh No!!!!!

Shrimpicus Maximus : Katya I don’t have a schedule yet and my first day is TODAY! What do I do??? Raine already left for work, I can’t ask them! What if we got it yesterday and I just wasn’t paying attention???
Luz’s rant to fatalism continued from there, growing worse and worse with every text. First it was detention, then expulsion, then being blacklisted from any school whatsoever. She probably would have gone further if Katya hadn’t interceded.

Me : Hey, don’t sweat it! Whatever admin you met with is probably just as embarrassed that they forgot to give you a schedule as you are worried about not having one.

Shrimpicus Maximus : Really?

Me : Really. Just go a little early, and ask them for one at the front desk.

Shrimpicus Maximus : Are you sure?

Me : It’ll be fine. And if it isn’t, just give me a call and I’ll come help out or whatever.

Shrimpicus Maximus : Thank youuuuuu!!!!!!!

The following texts were strings of heart emojis, a few cute demon videos, and a brief conversation about the logistics of vegetable romance, and whether or not kissing an onion would make another onion cry, since their mouths are essentially holes to their insides and thus release the same chemicals that cutting an onion would.

The results were inconclusive, but divisive.

Eventually though, Luz had to go if she was going to be anywhere near early for classes. She did need a schedule, after all.

Me : Have a good first day shrimp, and remember, anything goes wrong you can always call me. Or Raine, or whatever.

Shrimpicus Maximus : I’m average height for my age! And thanks Katya, I will ^-^!

Katya snorted, finally putting the phone down and getting changed out of her pajamas and into actual work clothing. Two thoughts warred in her brain.

‘That girl is far too sweet to be going to a place like Hexside.’

‘If anyone hurts her, I’ll skin them alive.’

 

 

She was standing at the bottom of the steps, staring up at one of the coolest buildings she’d ever been inside of. Magic school. A magic school!! And she couldn’t bring herself to go inside.

After having been so excited last night, so ready for anything, it really should have come as a surprise that her stomach was doing flips and her feet were refusing to step forward. But it really didn’t.

‘Ew, it’s the Luzer again.’

A whimper escaped from between her lips as memories from her last educational institution found their way to the surface.

‘Miss Noceda, you will stop fidgeting in this classroom, NOW.’

People hadn’t really liked her. Not that she could blame them, she hadn’t found anyone who even wanted to tolerate her outside of her mama before she’d met Katya.

‘This is a book club, not an azura club. If you’re not gonna talk about anything else, why do you even come here?’

Luz looked down at the rectangle she was turning over in her hand. She had an escape if she needed. She had multiple people willing to help get her out of this situation at a moment's notice, and thanks to last night, they were only a scroll call away.

“Luz, can you come down here please?”

In her memory, Luz looked up from the sheet music she'd been trying to get a handle on before shouting "Coming!" and heading for the stairs.

She may not be able to play anything without blowing a hole in the wall yet, but Raine and Principal Bump were confident that she would be able to learn to control herself. All it would take was time and practice.

So in light of that, and in preparation for what was now the next day, Luz had dove headfirst into learning everything she could about music, guitars specifically. Scales, tablature, chords, sheet music, you name it. It seemed like every time she learned something, it turned into something more that she had to learn, and there was so much that none of it was sticking in her head so she continually had to go back and review what she’d already read.

While she might not be able to practice it, let alone remember it, her mind had honed in like a starving dog on a piece of meat, tearing into it with wild abandon. Most of the flesh of the matter was being thrown wildly too and fro, but when you had nothing to properly focus on for weeks on end, anything was better.

The stairs had thumped beneath her in a rhythm as she went down, attempting to keep an even pace.

That was another thing she was working on, an even pace. A tempo.

'Music is about emotion, but just as much of it comes from control.' She remembered Millie having said back when she was touring the bard coven, and from everything Luz had seen, the old woman was right. Half notes, full notes, quarter notes, rests, all in a specific period of time.

Maybe when her mama had tried to get her into violin lessons all those years ago she should have paid more attention…

So as she descended the stairs, and as she walked toward the living room she had kept an even pace in her mind, counting off the beats. One two three four, one two three four, one two three four, and so on.

What she didn't know, and what had caused her guardian to smirk as she entered the room they were standing in, was that she was quietly mouthing along to the words in her head, a concentrated look on her downturned face.

Said guardian coughed, snapping her out of her trance.

"Oh, sorry, I got a little distracted."

They just smiled. "I noticed."

The nervous laughter that came from her turned that smile into a pitying one, and her O'pas hand came over to her shoulder, pulling her toward a chair that they proceeded to squat in front of.

"Luz, I have some contacts who are trying to find a way to get you home, but so far all they’ve found is a human junk stand, and the proprietor has been seen harvesting trash slugs many times, so they’re pretty sure she doesn’t have a portal. But besides that, leads are drying up.”

In her memory, she still frowned. This didn’t sound like it was going anywhere good.

Raine has sighed, but forced themselves to meet her eyes as they spoke, and she could see the guilt welling up behind them. “We’re still looking Luz, but the hope of a quick solution seems to have left, so. Well, I probably should have gotten you one of these earlier, but I'm getting you one now.”

They drew a small box out from somewhere, and laid it in Luz’s hands.

She’d opened it, obviously, and Luz found herself looking down at the new scroll sitting in her hands.

When she looked up, she saw Raine giving her an awkward smile and quickly putting away a pair of thumbs up.

"You're starting school tomorrow, and I wanted you to have a way to contact me in case of an emergency." One of their hands came up to the back of their neck. “Amber said it was the best model, and, well, with my new salary I could afford it, so.”

They sighed.

“I just want you to be safe.”

She had surged forward into a hug.

The rest of the night had passed quickly, just a few numbers being programmed into her phone, and a quick hug goodnight. It was her first day of school tomorrow, and Raine insisted that she do her best to be well rested.

So now here she was, standing outside of the entrance to … well, to everything. She could keep working at Nora’s shop and staying in Raine’s place on the other days, but. Magic. Learning actual magic was at her fingertips, and she couldn’t bring herself to step forward.

Once more, Luz looked down at the scroll in her hands that she was fiddling with. She could always come back another day. Call Katya, go home and calm down, wait until she felt more ready.

The older girl had made her offer pretty clear, and Luz was pretty sure she hadn’t just been doing so to humor her. It had seemed genuine.

But still, she fiddled with the handle of her escape hatch. Her connection to the aetherweave. Her scroll, the second thing in this world that was really hers.

Well, third.

She tugged at the constrictive red sleeves she was wearing as she stared up the steps toward hexside.

She couldn’t put this off. If she did, she wasn’t sure she’d ever have the courage to go again, and then she’d just be stuck with… well, not nothing. She would have the BATTs, she would have Raine.

Her O’pa, she chided herself. She had to get used to calling them that, no matter how much it felt like she was betraying her mama or giving up on her sometimes. She wouldn’t let herself get thrown back in the conformatorium. And she knew that her mama wouldn’t want her thrown back in there either. She would understand. She would, and Luz would explain it to her, and it would all be okay when she got back.

If she got back.

The bump to her shoulder shocked her out of what would have almost definitely been a spiral. Although it did do so by sending her into another type of fall, one that ended with her hands and knees in the dirt.

“Oh, sorry, I didn’t see you there!” Said a voice from behind her.

“No, it’s okay! Sorry I was in the way!”

Turning around, Luz saw a blushing green haired girl in a purple uniform. There was a little star pinned to her uniform, and she was smoothing down whatever their collision had left disheveled.

As soon as she noticed Luz looking her direction, she huffed and seemed to attempt to flush all of the blood from her face before doing a double take.

The girls eyes narrowed.

“Have we met before?”

Luz tilted her head to the side. “I don’t think so? This is my first day, so, it’s unlikely at least.”

“No, I’ve definitely seen you around…” The other girl snapped her fingers. “You live at the bardic mansion, don’t you?”

Luz’s confusion only grew. “Y-yeah, how did you know that?”

The green haired girl grinned. “I’m your neighbor.”

“Oh, nice to meet you!”

“Oh! Well, seeing as its your first day, let me be the first to welcome you to Hexside!” Said the girl, offering a hand down to help Luz up. Luz didn’t miss the curl of discomfort in the girls lips at the dirt in her hand, but the girl also didn’t pull away, which was new. “I’m Amity, Amity Blight.”

Luz took her hand and allowed herself to be pulled up. “Nice to meet you! I’m Luz Whispers.”

Chapter 11: You Always Hurt the One You Love

Notes:

Turns out getting a way better job is a hell of a motivator to get back to writing.

To everyone who commented on the last chapter a year after I posted it, this is for you. Here's hoping the next one doesnt take two years!

Sorry if its a bit rough, I am posting it the minute I finished it because Im tired of this story languishing. Enjoy! Publishing this is my one day early birthday present to myself!

The clawffee line in the headquarters of the Emperor's Coven was always long. Longer than it had any real right to be, if Lilith was honest. She had suspected for many years that thanks to some confiscated wild magic their clawfee was simply more effective than any that the other covens brewed, and that the illusionists put on disguises to get at the sweet sweet nectar of life.

She snorted as she looked over her desk at the scouts under her command, and put her mug back under her personal machine. Being the boss had its perks after all.

While spacious, the rooms dedicated to the Emperor's Coven always had a way of feeling cramped. The windows were a little too thin to get a wide view of the sky or landscape, the ceilings a little too high, making the walls feel that much closer, and the desks organized in rows all facing toward the door, hers at the very back. She could oversee what everyone else was doing, but none could look over her shoulder. At least, not without being incredibly obvious about it.

‘A perfect projection of power and order.’

She snorted. Yeah, she had thought that way too when she started out, but in actuality it just made the system inefficient and discouraged anyone feeling like they could question the people above them in the chain of command.

Honest she wasn’t sure what her predecessor had been thinking, setting it up this way. She’d change it too, if it weren’t for the fact that Emperor Belos still very clearly admired the system, which of course meant there must be some benefit to it she was missing.

She took another sip of her coffee as the tapping of typewriter beasts writing reports washed over her ears. She used to take cases on as they came in, those that were high priority and demanded a skilled member of the coven to deal with, but she had learned her lesson the hard way. Soon enough, something would come in that required her immediate attention, and hers alone, and she would have to drop everything to prioritize it, making whichever poor scout had to pick up her case take twice as long redoing the requisite paperwork.

Sometimes it made her feel lazy, but rarely for long.

Case in point, she saw the door at the opposite end of the hallway creak open, and Steve carrying a pile of paperwork that she just knew was for her.
A forebodingly small pile of paperwork.

Strangely, it seemed that the smaller the pile the more time it took for Lilith to do the paperwork part of the mission, and the less time she got to actually spend in the field, making a positive impact. She sighed, and prepared herself for a mind numbing day of filling out the same poorly written form five times before getting it right.

Her elbow met her desk, and her head met her hand as Steve arrived.

Another sigh escaped her. “Hello Steve, what do you have for me today?”

If the bags underneath the Coven Head's eyes could talk, they would be begging Steve to fall over dead and take the paperwork with him. Unluckily for them they could not, at least not since the incident in junior year at Hexside, and thus Steve was allowed to continue his quest to torture the pair of them.

Or, well, to do his job. But that’s likely not what the eye bags would think.

The horned witch gave her a smile that she could just barely see beneath his mask, one that spoke not of the mischievous glee she would see on Kikimora’s face when the little weasel gave her some mundane piece of paper that would take up her entire day while she got nothing done, but one that spoke of something altogether significantly more kind. A smile that spoke of a simple assignment.

“Good morning Coven Head Lilith.” Steve said with a bow. Good, he was still observing formality even though Lilith was being familiar, exactly how it should be according to the last book she read on being a boss She would hate to have to berate him in front of the whole Coven, as said book suggested.

She had of course read dozens years ago to prepare for her current position, but occasionally she did go back and reread them for helpful tips. The latest, ‘Nine habits, Nine covens’ was supposedly written by the Emperor himself under the pen name of ‘Phillip W.’

A ridiculous conspiracy theory, but somehow the book had made its way into the hands of all the Coven Heads, with a recommendation from the Emperor, so she would follow its teachings even if she didn’t think they would work quite as well as some other ideas she had heard. Questioning the recommendations of the speaker for the Titan was a fast route towards questioning the Titan, which would of course lead to her falling to being a wild witch.

Regardless, the time for idle musings was over. “At ease, Steve.” She said, releasing him from his bow.

As he straightened, he held out the papers he had come in with. “It seems that Scooter has finally finished the paperwork to process his replacement as head of the Bard coven.”

Lilith almost rolled her eyes as she reached out to take the papers. “Finally, I swear to the Titan that man was dragging his feet for months. At least now we can get the pre-initiation investigation done with. Who did he go with?”

She took a sip of her clawffee as she started leafing through the documents, trying to reach the part where the next Coven Head was actually named.

“You went to school with them actually, a bard named Raine Whispers.”

Steve was very lucky to be standing to the side, and thus avoid the massive amounts of clawffee sprayed from the head of his coven's mouth.

 

“And you’re sure Crane wasn’t playing an elaborate joke on me?”

“Yes Coven Head Clawthorne. Apparently he’s already had them move into the Bardic Mansion, he didn’t want to live there anymore.”

Lilith shook her head as the pair rounded the corner on their final approach to the Bonesborough chapter house of the Bard coven. “Ha, two out of three I suppose. If only Eda were still with us now.”

Steve only hummed in acknowledgement. Over their years of working together, he had come to some understanding over what a touchy subject her erstwhile sister had become.

“You know, maybe seeing what her ex has amounted to will do her some good, show her that she can still abandon her wild witch ways like they did when they broke up with her, that she can still make something of herself.” The smile Lilith wore at the end of that statement was a brittle, fragile thing. One tempered with years of experience being wrong, and having her hopes of her little sister coming to her senses be dashed upon the rocks of Edas feral nature.

Steve knew better than to hum in acknowledgement of a statement like that. She really would have to look into promoting him soon, but not too high. Lilith didn’t want to think about how long it would take to train a replacement.

The pair continued the seventeen final paces that it took to reach the entrance to the chapter house in silence, and did the same as they passed through the beige hallways and up to the entrance of Whispers current office, startling many a bookish bard on the way. An investigation should not have a warning, lest the subject have time to hide something. With that in mind, Lilith had not called ahead to schedule an appointment. She was the Coven Head of what was arguably the Head Coven. Whispers schedule could flex around her, or it would be flexed around her.

Finally they reached the door, with the receptionists deck suspiciously empty sans a small placard that read ‘Millicent Rile’. Rile… wasn’t that Kikimoras last name? She had to wonder if Raine had their own thorn in the side. Perhaps the two of them could compare coping strategies.

Before she could get closer, Lilith heard muffled conversation inside. Muffled conversation in which Lilith recognized the voice of one of the speakers.

“I’m just worried about her, it’s her first day.”

First day? First day doing what? Who’s first day? Lilith held up a hand in a fist, Steve dutifully stopping as she creeped closer to listen at the door.

“You have to let go at some point, you know that.”

“But, but she’s… I’ve kept her sheltered for so long, Millie, what if something happens?”

Kept her sheltered? Did Raine have some kind of secret apprentice? Secret weapon?

“Of course something is going to happen, she’s fourteen and she’s been cooped up for fourteen years! But do you really think Bump would let something happen to her?”

Fourteen? Not a secret weapon, at least not unless they had also been reading Nine Covens, Nine Habits. Chapter 2 went into the effectiveness of that strategy, and while Lilith did find it distasteful she was incredibly doubtful that Raine would ever have a child soldier. They just didn’t seem the type.

Wait Bump? Was this about Hexside?

“Yes!”

“Fine, do you really think he would let something permanent happen to her?”

There was a pause. Lilith continued listening, better to hear the end of the conversation before going in, just in case they tried to hide whatever information this would reveal.

“No. No he wouldn’t.”

“She has her scroll, she has a decent school, and you only have to wait what, five hours to pick her up?”

Pick up?

“Four hours and thirty seven minutes, I’m leaving in four hours and thirty seven minutes.”

“Don’t be a hippogriff parent, Whispers. Every raindrop has to fall eventually. Now, are you done catastrophizing? Can I get back to my job and you to yours?”

Raine sighed, intensely enough that Lilith could hear it through the door. “Yes Millie, thank you. I just. I worry.”

“I know Deputy Whispers, I know.” There was the tapping sound of feet approaching the door and Lilith quickly backed away, sending a nod to Steve. The pair moved to a position of attention in front of the desk.

Whispers’ office door creaked open, and Lilith had to look down to see the palmling standing there. A different coloration to her cranial manus, the palmlings hair equivalent of hair, made any relation to Kikimora unlikely. The light, almost eggshell blue did look good on her though. Still. Best to be cautious.

“Oh!” said the short one, Millicent given the empty desk she had started towards. The woman's eyes were level with Liliths knees, and she started speaking before fully looking up. “Hello, did you have an appoi-”

The sudden silence and widening of her eyes, the intake of breath, and the small, likely subconscious step back signaled when she met Lilith's eyes and realized who she was talking to.

“Poi, poi, appoint-”

“No,” The Coven Head cut her off, before walking towards the door anyways, “and I don’t need one.”

“I, but-”

The woman was cut off again as Lilith opened the door, eliciting a startled, almost frightened ‘eep’. Hm. She would have to be investigated later. Fear of the Emperors Coven could be a sign of wild witch sympathies, or a sign someone had forgotten to pay a parking ticket for too long. The investigation wouldn’t necessarily turn up anything, but what was important was to be thorough.

“Deputy Whispers, it certainly has been a while, hasn’t it?”

The poor bard jumped almost clear out of their skin as Lilith entered the room, their scroll flying into the air only to be snatched at three separate times to prevent it from falling to the floor. Paperwork on their desk was left untouched.

Hexting their agent at Hexside? A possibility to keep in mind.

“I, ah, just, one moment!”

Ah, the Bard never changed.

And they were still focused on their scroll.

Oh Titan they hadn’t even realized who Lilith was yet had they? What had them this stressed? Titan dammit they didn’t want to arrest Whispers, both because of their mutual history and because getting Scooter to pick another replacement would be like pulling molars, barehanded, after the patient's mouth had been coated in grease.

“Deputy Whispers.” She said, her voice entering a cold tone that she used to intimidate suspects and criminals that she was in pursuit of. They froze. “Have a seat. We have much to discuss.”

Finally, their eyes looked over toward her. Slight bags beneath them, sleepless nights? Common with those high up in the coven, not evidence one way or the other.

“Lilith!?”

The confusion on the bard's face was evident, one eyebrow raised, head tilted to the side, mouth even slightly agape. But no fear. Not involved in something illicit? That confident that they wouldn’t be discovered? Or simply that surprised by seeing a childhood friend. More evidence for any option.

She waited for a moment as Whispers got their bearings, rolled up their scroll, and put it away in their back pocket. “I’m sorry, I would have cleaned up if I knew an old friend was dropping by.” They said as they hurried to clean off a section of their desk. While they did so, Lilith took stock of the office around her. Beige walls, as per regulation. A somewhat colorful rug with an interlocking pattern of red, pink, and orange in front of Whispers desk, warming the area that visitors would first enter into.

Behind the desk, against the right wall a set of shelves filled with various musical compositions, and against the left a number of pictures. Directly behind the desk, a large window. Good decision making skills, facing away from the window prevents distractions, shows dedication to the coven.

There was a slight clatter as Whispers grabbed something from the lowest shelf, one hidden by the desk, and came back to visibility with a set of mugs and what looked like instant tea. “Ah, sorry I don’t have much selection, are you alright with hurl grey?”

Not much selection, and the teapot appeared to be brand new. A recent change? Hurl grey, caffeinated but less so than clawfee, trying to take care of their health better? A recent health scare perhaps? Something making Whispers want to be around longer, or more alert outside of work?

“Hurl grey works lovely Whispers, thank you.”

They nodded and moved to prepare the tea, and as they did so Lilith took a closer look at the pictures on the wall. A number of pictures of their mothers, siblings and cousins, as expected, and some of their various students, Amber, Derwin, and Katya according to Steve’s preliminary report. The majority of the pictures though were of someone Lilith hadn’t seen before.

The first was of the girl with what she was fairly certain was an instrument strapped over her shoulders, though with all the levers and knobs on it it may be a weapon? She looked like she was next to tears, but tears of happiness. Background of beige and other instruments indicated the bard coven, and the angle indicated it was taken from somewhere low, a relatively short individual.

She hadn’t seen many short people in this chapter house, perhaps a relative of Millicent on a witch side of the family?

The second was of the girl fighting with Katya in what appeared to be a thrift shop, in fact there were a set that seemed to be from the same day given the unchanging outfits. No, not fighting, both were smiling. Bickering. Old friends? New hypothesis, a friend or relative of Katyas that Raine had gotten close to. Reasonable, considering what she knew of the girl's parentage. It was a shame that she hadn’t found any crimes the elder fangs had committed. Katya seemed a sweet girl, beyond a brief stint in the conformatorium. But, considering that Wrath hadn’t actually filed the paperwork for that, she was likely just another victim of the fools quest to arrest everyone who was even slightly different. They should be focusing on wild witches, and his waste of coven resources was-!

Lilith took in a deep breath, and let it out. That was an investigation for later. His use of coven resources was a drain that would be addressed once she figured out why his staff file was marked as essential but with encrypted details.

So, a possible friend of Katyas. But there were more, a set of pictures taken within the halls of Hexside with the girl in a different outfit, obviously both curious and excited by everything around her. In some pictures principal Bump appeared. A school tour? It ended with a selfie of Raine and the girl, the girls outfit having been changed into a Hexside school uniform with huge smiles on both their faces. Bard colors, naturally.

Just what was going on?

Last picture in what seemed to be the set, Raine in a healer's bed holding what appeared to be a baby. Warping on the edges of the photo and around the child indicated slight doctoring, but that wasn’t that much of a surprise considering the literal sparkles around the baby and the lens flare shining off of her. Many parents doctored pictures of their children's births to fully capture the emotions they had been feeling at the time, or at least that had been a trend sixteen to eleven years ago, less so now.

Why was Whispers holding the child though? She leaned in to get a closer look, but by then they were actually done with what they had been preparing.

“Hurl grey, hot!” The bard smirked at her, and it took her a moment to realize what they were referencing. Sea Trek, the Next Generation. A show she and they had both loved as children, about a far future when boats that could actually go over the seas high boil point and visit other landmasses, beyond the outlying islands. They had some abomination magic creature, Repla’ Kaytor, that could make any food in the world, but the captain had only ever wanted the same tea.

She smiled, taking the proffered mug and sitting down in the chair on the opposing side of the desk from Whispers as they did the same on their own. “Thank you. It has been a long time since I thought about that show.”

Whispers smiled in return as they leaned forward. “Ah, it had been for me too, but I’ve been watching it lately with my-”

There was a sudden drop in their face, blood draining as their eyes widened, flickering over to the wall of photographs before going back to Lilith. They gulped, looking for the life of them like a child who had not only been caught with their hand in the cookie jar, but been caught by someone who they knew would assume they had been stealing those cookies for years even though they had only started doing so the night before. The bard attempted to school their face and redirect. They coughed.

“Anyways, what brings you here today, Lilith?”

She raised an eyebrow, and in response they began taking a sip of their tea. She could wait for answers, but she would be getting them as part of this investigation. “Coven Head Clawthorne today, Deputy Whispers. Scooter Crane has finally finished the paperwork you have no doubt been prepared for, and I am here to investigate you.”

They leaned backwards, eyebrows raised. “Investigate? Scooter didn’t tell me anything about an investigation when they started pushing me through the process.”

Hm, sweat droplets on the side of the head, but small. Nervous, but not too nervous. An old crime? Something from their past that they abandoned?

Lilith hummed in acknowledgement. “It wouldn’t be much of an investigation if you knew it was coming. It's mostly done already, really, I’m just here to ask a few questions. You know how it is in leadership, dot a few i’s, cross a few t’s.”

The chuckle from across the table was followed by exactly what Lilith wanted to hear. After all, the first question should never be an obvious question. “It can be burdensome, but it is the Titans will.”

She nodded again. “Really it’s a formality, are you or any of your associates wild witches?”

They smiled again, rolling up their sleeve. “No Lilith, we aren’t.” She’d seen their mark before, a few years ago at a covention she was fairly sure. The slight roll of the eyes was only to be expected. The ease of the answer allowed the lie detection spell she’d cast below the lip of the desk to go unnoticed.

“And have you ever had an association with a wild witch?”

They flinched. “I… you know the answer to that Lily, it was years ago.”

“I do need an answer, Deputy Whispers.”

Raine sighed before answering. “Yes, I dated Eda Clawthorne for almost a decade, but I broke up with her fifteen years ago. I’ve only seen her, I think once since? And it wasn’t intentional, I just passed her in the market.”

Truth. Good, still what she was expecting. Now time to ask the more specific questions.

“Who was that you were talking about with Millicent earlier?”

They froze. “I, um, that was. I don’t think she has anything to do with, I mean, do you really have to know?”

Lilith narrowed her eyes. “Yes Whispers, I really have to know.” This could go poorly. She prepared a temporary paralysis spell in her off hand.

Raine cringed, their shoulders bunching up as they squinted, preparing for a blow. “I… she’s my daughter.”

Truth. Hm, she hadn’t known Raine had a daughter. That is something Steve’s investigation should have turned up. Which meant Raine had been hiding her for some reason. She already had them on admission, it was difficult for suspects to continue a lie after a truth had already been outed. “I see. And why did you keep her hidden for so long?”

The tension in her interviewees shoulders eased slightly. “I. She…” They paused, struggling to get the words out, “I saw you looking at her pictures earlier, look closer, pay attention to the top of her ears.”

Lilith squinted at them, before leaning over to inspect the pictures again. It took her a moment to place, and she kicked herself for not noticing it earlier.

Rounded Lobe Syndrome.

Often results in witches with limited, small, or no bile sack whatsoever, causing them to be hidden or kept inside for their own safety. Additional lungs may develop, but without magic the isles were just too dangerous for them.

Belos’ Historium told that in the savage ages they were simply left out to die. It was a blessing that when he took power he made sure that was illegal, and that they should simply be kept in their homes, for their own safety.

“I’m sorry.” She was. She couldn’t imagine growing up without magic.

Whispers shook their head. “Thanks. We think we’ve found a way for her to do magic, but it might be too dangerous, I don’t know. She’s actually at her first day at Hexside right now, that's the conversation you were overhearing. I’m just worried about her, she doesn’t have a lot of experience in this world, and I, just, anything could happen! She’s only fourteen-”

They stopped themselves, head whipping over to look at Lilith, and it finally clicked.

Rounded Lobe Syndrome often resulted from having one cursed parent. Raine and Eda had broken up fifteen years ago.

Drastically reduced lifespan, the average age being seventy, middle-aged for a witch though it affected some demons differently.

Only fourteen.

“I. Raine. I have to sit down.”

She had cut her nieces lifespan in half. She had taken her magic away. Curses, curses could be cured, but rounded lobe was. That was permanent.

She had ruined another innocent life for her own gain, before it had even been born.

“Lilith, it’s-”

She held up a hand. “You. Your interview is fine Raine. I have to go, I, I have to go think about some things.”

They tried to keep talking to her, but she was out the door and on her Palisman before much more could be said.

Notes:

I'm going to do my best to update this fic every Saturday, I hope you all like it! It's one of my favorite AUs!

Remember, the more comments I get, the faster I can write! Especially the really long ones! Go on rants!