Chapter Text
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Fifteen days.
Fifteen days ago Obi-Wan’s world ended.
It was strange to find that when he walked out of his house that Thursday morning the sky was still a bright blue, the air was crisp, and the grass was still a yellow-green color, patches of snow in shady spots.
It was as if the world itself was mocking him.
He felt like something ought to have been wrong. The sky should be dark and bleary or he should be able to see smoke in the distance. He feels like there should be riots in the capital or flooding in the streets or- or something.
Fifteen days ago Obi-Wan’s world ended but life kept going.
The sun still rose in the morning and the moon came out at night. The cars still passed him on their way to work and buses still stopped to pick up people waiting at the stops and there were people pushing strollers as they talked on the phone and didn’t anyone realize that something was painfully wrong ?
It didn’t make sense for the sun to shine and for people to continue on as they were when Obi-Wan couldn’t help but brush the space where his wedding ring sat and wonder if there was any point in it being there anymore.
Except that he knew that there wasn’t a reason for it to be there anymore. He knew that.
But when they’d brought the caskets back after everything that had happened, Cody’s body hadn’t been in any of them.
Obi-Wan knew that just because they didn’t find his body didn’t mean that Cody was somehow miraculously alive. That’s not how things worked in the real world. Soldiers died everyday and there wasn’t enough to recover or they just didn’t know how or where they had died. He could have been in a place that would be too dangerous to recover and Obi-Wan would never know because it was all classified.
He hated that word.
Classified.
He’d accepted that he’d never get to know what Cody did while he was away. He’d accepted that he’d be in dangerous situations and that even if everything worked out and he came home, Obi-Wan couldn’t necessarily help him with the ghosts he brought back with him. It was hard to help someone when they couldn’t tell you what they were going through.
But he’d also known that his husband would come home to him, haunted or not, and even if he couldn’t know what had happened he could still hold him. He could still kiss him and map his new scars and take stock to know that the man was still there. He could still curl up into him at night and help him through the nightmares and-.
There was always something he could do.
But what were you supposed to do when the team lead of Tango knocked on your down, in his dress blues. As soon as he’d asked to confirm Obi-Wan’s identity he’d known what had happened.
He’d been unable to stand, falling to his knees as he looked over the man’s shoulder to see Ahsoka standing there, eyes filled with the kind of pity that told him exactly what had happened.
He could remember Ahsoka gently taking his arm, helping him off the floor and onto the nearest chair. He remembered her pressing a glass into his hand. He’d looked at the condensation dripping down the glass for what felt like an eternity.
He wasn’t sure in that moment if he could really feel anything. Everything felt so far away and he couldn’t make any sense of it. He was alive. He was alive but every breath felt like he was dragging in carbon dioxide instead of oxygen, and he was at the bottom of a trench somewhere, the water pressure so great his chest felt like it might implode.
He didn’t understand what the point of breathing was anymore and it seemed, with how hard it had become, that his body had felt the same way.
He didn’t have the words, wasn’t sure that they would ever come to him, even given the rest of his life and then some. Without Cody to hear what he was saying, there wasn’t any point. The syllables that left his mouth felt harsh and jagged like they were nails that would rip his throat up if he dared to try to force them from his lungs.
But then he remembered the two preschoolers in daycare. The ones that were counting on him to pick them up and their older brother in first grade who was currently in a winter holiday celebration with his class, probably eating too much sugar and cutting out snowflakes with no idea that his world was about to be torn apart again.
There had been so much to do that his head was swimming with it but his muscles were frozen in protest, refusing to do anything except sit on that chair, in their living room, with people murmuring around them but he didn’t know what they were saying and they might as well have been speaking Maori for all of the good that it did them.
He’d been grateful that Jesse and Echo hadn’t been there. He couldn’t have imagined what would have happened if the two of them had been there to see him break. He wasn’t even sure what he’d benign to tell Rex. They had all had enough happen to them in their very short lifetimes. He hadn’t been sure at that moment how he was going to tell them. He wasn’t really sure at that moment how he was going to tell them anything. But that hadn’t been the worst part.
The not knowing. That was the worst part. The runarounds and the use of classified and the burial of a man who wasn’t even in the casket that they laid in the ground of Arlington had been the worst part of it.
Obi-Wan didn’t even have the man’s tags. There had been nothing left of him, according to the rest of his team. Obi-Wan had been forced to stand next to two sets of parents and four wives. Wives who, in his opinion, unfairly had something to mourn. They had some piece of their husbands to prove that they had been there. That they had been something. It seemed grossly unjust that the woman he knew for a fact had been cheating on her husband with a different member of another team had something to mourn and Obi-Wan had given everything he’d had and still was left with nothing.
Jesse had twisted his fingers into the black button-down that Obi-Wan had been wearing and shoved his face into his chest, refusing to let go throughout the entire ceremony. Halfway through, he’d clumsily picked up Echo, careful of the braces on the boy’s legs as he balanced him carefully on his hips, trying not to tear up at the look of devastation that was clear on his face. Rex, ever trying to be the brave one, had lasted almost the entire ceremony, until they’d placed flowers on the empty casket and he too, had shoved his face into Obi-Wan’s shirt to hide the fact that tears were pricking at his eyes as they started to fold the flag that had been draped across Cody’s casket.
They had to hand the flag to Rex, since Obi-Wan’s hands had been completely full. It wasn’t until the shots had rung out that Obi-Wan realized that it was actually happening.
He’d have to say goodbye to his husband. There wasn’t any turning back now.
He’d watched the casket be lowered into the ground, thinking that the day shouldn’t have been as bright as it was. He’d thought that on a day like today there wasn’t any reason for the sun to be shining. He didn’t think it was fair that the air was unseasonably warm and bright on a day when it felt like it should have been dark as night.
There had been so much to do, after the funeral. After all, time waited for no one and had proved over and over again that it was unkind, even to those who didn’t deserve it.
Obi-Wan job had given him a leave of absence to deal with the grief.
But there was so much that they didn’t tell you when they gave you time to mourn.
They never said that there were a million and one other things that you would have to take care of. They didn’t mention that there were thousands of forms and applications to do. They didn’t mention that you would be forced to find a new home on a budget that was almost half of what you had originally started on or that even if grief threatened to bury you, you still had to appeal for the rights to retain your health insurance. They didn’t mention that in between sleepless nights and bouts of crying he’d be looking at listings to find a new place to live or that getting custody of three children wasn’t just as easy as my husband wanted me to have them because in the state of Virginia a parent who wasn’t fit to take care of their child was still allowed to say they didn’t want a faggot raising their child and that was still grounds for Obi-Wan to be forced into court to defend his right to take care of children that didn’t actually have anywhere else to go.
So fifteen days after he’d been notified that his husband had died, Obi-Wan was forced from a home that he was currently packing up to go in front of a judge to defend his right to children that he’d been taking care of since they were infants.
So Obi-Wan had dragged himself out of bed, had taken a shower, had gone over what he was supposed to say with a lawyer who’d been assigned to the case. He’d managed to get out the door with very few tears smiling gratefully at Ahsoka as he handed her pizza money and walked down the steps.
He’d been picked up so that he didn’t have to drive, which had been nice because he was sure that his hands were still too shaky to actually be able to safely get anywhere and he’d sat there, fiddling with a ring that had been part of the future he’d envisioned for himself but was now just a reminder that he’d never have anything he truly wanted.
It was as if history was repeating itself and Obi-Wan wondered why he’d ever thought it could go any other way.
But then he remembered the way Cody had looked at him and sworn up and down that he would never leave him. He promised that even if he were to enter the Navy like he wanted to, he wouldn’t leave Obi-Wan behind. It was something that would bring them a steady income to take care of his sibling- now siblings- and Cody had always looked at the military with rose-tinted glasses.
He could be more than just a nameless face in the crowd. That’s what he’d told Obi-Wan. He’d finally get to make something of himself, give his family a better name than the one they’d created for themselves. He’d used the same reasoning when he’d been accepted as a Navy Seal.
Except, what kind of honor was there in dying in a way that no one ever knew? What was the point in a cold metal star with the knowledge that his husband was dead? A medal of honor wouldn’t keep Obi-Wan warm at night while his husband was buried in the ground and it wasn’t as if they could announce it to the world. It would be at least fifteen years before they could reveal to the general public and to Obi-Wan what his husband had done to receive the honor.
There was no honor in death and especially not in Cody’s death.
There was no honor in leaving behind a husband and three brothers who would forever live with your absence and the knowledge that they would have to grow up without you.
That’s what Obi-Wan wished he could tell Cody as he watched buildings pass by in a blur.
That’s what he wished he could have told him before he’d done something heroic and gained a medal while losing his life and left behind four people who didn't know how to live without him.
There may be victory in death but there was no honor.
Chapter Text
This is my tumblr (x). There's quite the mash up of Stars Wars stuff over there but it's always a fun time!
There’s a laundry list of things wrong with the American judicial system. Given half the chance Cody could have and would have gone through the list in alphabetical order and in chronological order if someone had asked. Obi-Wan, being from London, was a little more unfamiliar with the system as a whole but knew that like much of the justice systems in the world, there were things that were inherently unfair.
Obi-Wan hadn’t been to a courthouse since the day he’d gained citizenship in the United States. There just weren’t many reasons to go there if you didn’t have any business. He couldn’t help but wonder if they were supposed to be imposing or if it was just the way the courts were supposed to look as he took in the towering pillars of the granite building.
He got out of the car, using his hand to shield his eyes from the sunlight as it nearly blinded him, and followed the lawyer closely. He was explaining something and Obi-Wan knew he should have been listening but words didn’t make sense most of the time. Not these days.
If he’d thought for a minute that the court would allow him clemency because of what was going on, he was of course wrong. It seemed, that whatever backwater lawyer that Jango Fett had managed to find, wasn’t really in the case for the money but instead for the precedent. He wanted to pave the way for grandparents who wanted to take children from their homosexual children despite a will that clearly stated the opposite. Just because the Supreme Court had ruled in favor of gay marriage, didn’t mean that all of the states were on board and it certainly didn’t mean that they wouldn’t attack those who benefited from the ruling for other things.
The questions didn’t make any sense. Obi-Wan wasn’t under investigation. He hadn’t done anything wrong but it seemed that everything they could find on him had been dragged to light. Things that weren’t even technically bad.
“So did you apply for citizenship after you married your husband?”
Obi-Wan looked at the opposing lawyer for a minute, trying to understand what he was asking. He didn’t understand where the man was going with that.
“I did,” he confirmed.
“How soon after marrying your husband did you apply for your citizenship?”
The man wasn’t even looking at Obi-Wan. Instead, he was looking down at documentation like it was responding in Obi-Wan’s place. It was grating on his nerves. And it wasn’t the only thing that was grating on his nerves.
“I applied about three years after I married my late husband,” Obi-Wan responded.
“And how soon can you apply after marrying someone?” the man asked.
Obi-Wan gritted his teeth. He could feel his pulse get faster.
“About three years,” he responded.
“So you applied for citizenship as soon as you could?” the man asked and Obi-Wan had to bite his tongue.
He didn’t understand what the leading questions were for. It was a family court case, at least for the time being, and there was no jury. The man was digging at things that didn’t actually matter.
“I don’t understand what this line of questioning is for and I think it’s a bit unnecessary to drag it out for this long. This is not a criminal hearing.”
Obi-Wan’s lawyer Mace Windu was a no-nonsense kind of man who had been on the end of many cases for military personnel and spouses alike. The military didn’t take kindly to their toes being stepped on and they most certainly didn’t take kindly to someone trying to go against the wishes of one of their own. Cody had died a hero and they weren’t likely to forget that, even if their reach was limited.
He was clearly irritated or perhaps he was just realizing that Obi-Wan himself was reaching his end. Was it not enough that this man had attacked him based on his sexuality? In what kind of fucked up world could someone use bible verses in a court and nobody bat an eye?
Obi-Wan didn’t give a fuck if they thought he was going to Hell. That was great for them. He didn’t care for their ridiculous fake studies that talked of instability in households with same-sex couples and he certainly didn’t give a fuck about how they thought he was damning his children’s souls when they’d been the ones to get Rex, Jesse, and Echo taken away in the first place. They could kiss his fucking ass.
“I’m merely wondering why he applied immediately for American citizenship after marrying his husband. It isn’t uncommon that people marry United States citizens so that they can a-.”
“Fuck you.”
Obi-Wan was shaking with anger. He could feel his face heating up at the realization of what the man was trying to say.
“Excuse-?” the man started to say.
“I married my husband-,” Obi-Wan started to say.
“Obi-Wan.”
He looked up at Mace’s pinched expression and felt a stab of guilt. He knew that this was the point of the questioning. It was to rile him up so that he looked like the bad guy but for fuck’s sake he was sitting in a courtroom fighting for his rights to children that had been legally put under his care fifteen fucking days after his husband had died and eight days after he’d watched them lower an empty casket into the ground.
“I’m sorry,” he apologized tightly, “I- My late husband is a touchy subject right now. I apologize.”
He looked to the stern judge, whose face remained impassive, as it had the whole court hearing. It was impossible to know what the man was thinking and he was so ancient that he looked like he would keel over any day now. That already didn’t feel like it would bode well for him, despite what Windu told him about Judge Yoda.
He looked back at the lawyer, “I was already a permanent resident based on my work as a University professor at New York University and then at Old Dominion University in Norfolk. I didn’t need citizenship. And after being together for eight years and married for six I’d certainly hope it wouldn’t look like I did.”
“So if your job and your husband was the only thing keeping you here then why should we believe you will stay in the United States? What are we going to do if the children were brought back to England and then you didn’t come back?”
Obi-Wan swallowed back the curses he wished he could fling at the man, “Then I would be arrested. England has an extradition treaty with the United States and I think you’ll find I do not have anywhere near enough money to hide from two governments.”
“So you’ve thought about it,” the man said.
“Not in great detail,” Obi-Wan said, “But it does seem like you have. I don’t have any family left alive in England and I’ve got children to take care of here who aren’t residents of England. It doesn’t make any sense for me to go back there.”
“Then why retain citizenship there at all? If there’s nothing left for you?”
Obi-Wan took a deep breath, reminding himself of why he was doing this, “I might not have any ties but it was still where I was born and where I grew up until I came to school in America. Plenty of people leave the States and still retain citizenship.”
“I feel as though this line of questioning has gotten out of hand,” Windu cut in smoothly as he stood, “May I suggest we get back to the issue at hand…”
He got back later than he’d been planning on. It seemed that the lawyer had taken every shot he could, not caring about anything but his end goal. Still, according to Mace, the law was on their side. Cody had a will. He’d explicitly said that he wanted his siblings to go into Obi-Wan’s care. That wasn’t something they would go against lightly.
It didn’t mean that when he returned he didn’t hug all three boys for longer than strictly necessary, kissing their heads and tucking them into bed with promises to see them in the morning. Soon, he knew that they would have to go back to school but today wasn’t the day and neither would tomorrow be.
He sat at the island in their kitchen, huffing as he pushed aside vases of flowers that had started gathering on his counter and multiplied every time he wasn’t looking. Their sympathy cards didn’t do anything to ease the ache in his chest and Obi-Wan had always been atrocious at keeping plants alive.
It was something Cody had always teased him about when he’d come home after a month-long mission and shook his head as he was forced to rehabilitate their flowerbeds. Obi-Wan was able to keep the vegetable patch alive and that was about as far as he’d been able to achieve.
The flowers just wilted and then died, which Obi-Wan thought wryly, as he picked a petal off of lavender daisy, was exactly what he felt like doing. It didn’t make any sense to give someone who had just suffered death something that was bound to die and it didn’t make any sense that all the arrangements were white, blue, and purple. What was it about those colors that screamed death, he wondered? He very much doubted that Cody had seen any of those colors in his final moments. It was the desert. It had been a land of tans and browns that Cody claimed had life but Obi-Wan was still skeptical about.
“You know you are only speeding up the death of those poor flowers,” Ahsoka told him as she leaned on the counter across from him.
“Why do they use white and blue?” Obi-Wan asked, rather than comment, “I don’t understand. I’m sure that he saw a lot of browns. Maybe some grays, some reds if he was particularly unlucky but all I get is blue and white and lavender.”
“I don’t know,” Ahsoka admitted, “I don’t really know any flower history. My brother might.”
“Ah yes,” he said, “How is Anakin?”
“Worried about you,” she told him, “You promised you would call last week and you didn’t.”
“I had other things to deal with,” Obi-Wan told her, looking up at her, “Do you have any idea how much paperwork you have to do when someone dies? I suppose not. But I guess it’s only a matter of time before Anakin finds out.”
“Obi-Wan,” she told him sharply, “Don’t say things like that.”
“What else is there to say?” he asked her bitterly, “Over half your team is gone and you want to sit here and pretend everything is okay? They can’t deploy you all because they need to replace four people. Four funerals just in your team.”
“You knew that something like this could happen-,” Ahsoka started to say, looking so tired that for a moment Obi-Wan felt awful but he was tired too. He was broken and angry and he’s the one who had lost his husband.
“I know,” he snapped back at her and then sighed, “I know. I guess- I don’t know what I thought to be honest. I thought he would retire before this had to happen. I- I thought that he’d gotten through six years and- and-.”
He let out a sob, closing his eyes as his hands clenched the counter, “I’d hoped he would accept the offer to take a desk job so that he could be home all the time. If he’d just accepted it a few weeks earlier then this wouldn’t have happened.”
“Obi-Wan you know he didn’t-,” she began.
“I know!” he bit back, “I know he didn’t want to leave his team. He thought as the team lead you all needed him but we needed him too Ahsoka. Now he’s left behind four people who needed him and I don’t even get to know why.”
He looked up at her, as tears started to spill over, “Can’t anybody tell me why? Why do seven people get their husbands back to mourn and I don’t? Can’t anybody tell me why he got a fucking medal? He supposedly did something worth the greatest honor in the military but no one can do me the honor of telling me what happened?”
“Obi-Wan…” Ahsoka started to trail off, her own eyes looking wet, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry that we can’t tell you what happened but I can tell you he saved us.”
“That’s not an answer!” Obi-Wan yelled, voice breaking, “That’s not-. That’s not good enough. There wasn’t even a body, Ahsoka. How am I expected to move on when I never get closure?”
“I- I’m sorry Obi-Wan,” Ahsoka finally said, “I don’t know how to help you.”
“Well that makes two of us,” Obi-Wan told her bitterly, “I don’t know where to even begin. Eight years and all that I’ve got left is paperwork and no idea what to do. There’s just- isn’t it bad enough that my husband is dead? Why do I have to fill out paper after paper to let everyone know? The house, the cars, the fucking health insurance, the credit cards. Everyone needs to know he’s dead. And now I’ve got to find a new home and change schools and- and do all this shit that I don’t even know where to begin doing.”
“You know that we are here to help,” Ahsoka told him, taking his hand, “We’ll do whatever we can. You can use the money from the life insurance policy to-.”
“I don’t know if you know this,” Obi-Wan snipped back, “But if your spouse isn’t identified and there isn’t some sort of remain, then your insurance company can try not to pay out life insurance. It’s just- I mean because of course they would try not to because why not? And how the fuck am I supposed to prove he’s dead? I can’t wait for insurance money for a year. I’ve got to be out of housing within the next six months Ahsoka.”
“I’m sure that if you explained what was going on they’d find a way to help you,” Ahsoka said, “The navy doesn’t leave their ow-.”
“I’m not theirs!” Obi-Wan snapped back, “My husband was one of theirs and if that’s how they treat their own- by leading them to their deaths and not bothering to bring back their bodies- then I don’t want to be one of theirs! All there going to tell me is that I-.”
He pushed at the papers scattered all over the island, watching as a few fell off the desk, fluttering down until they were lying on the ground. He really should clean the floor soon. He’d meant to do it over two weeks ago but then he’d had more important things to worry about.
“They’re just going to lead me to more forms to fill out,” Obi-Wan finally said after a few too many moments of silence, “And I’m not sure how much more paperwork I can handle.”
“I don’t know how to help if you don’t tell me what you need,” Ahsoka finally told him softly.
He looked up to her devastated expression and then put his head in his hands, trying to bite back the tears that were threatening to fall. He didn’t want to cry anymore. He didn’t even understand how he had any tears left.
“I don’t know how to help me,” Obi-Wan told her, voice barely audible, “I don’t know what I’m supposed to do now. I- We never talked about it and- and maybe that was my fault because I always avoided the topic but- now I’ve got no idea what I should be doing.”
“Well, why don’t we start with looking for a new home?” Ahsoka asked, “You’ve got some equity from this house and so you at least have a down payment. Me and Anakin had been looking to get out of our apartment so maybe we can all find a place together. Three incomes are better than one and you know he loves the kids.”
“You want to put five kids and three adults into one home?” Obi-Wan looked at her in disbelief.
“There’s a pretty house that’s a little out of the way but it’s got a lot of land,” she shrugged, “Anakin and I only fall about twenty thousand dollars a year too short to be able to afford it and honestly it’s more house than even the eight of us could use.”
“I- Let me think about it,” Obi-Wan replied, “I- With all of Echo’s doctor appointments we still need to stay close to where we are but it is definitely an option.”
Ahsoka gave him a small smile and he hoped the one he returned didn’t look as forced as it felt on his face.
Chapter 3
Notes:
Hello Friends!
Enjoy this chapter from Cody's POV. It will unravel a little bit more of the plot so I hope you enjoy it!
Thanks!
Marie
Chapter Text
This is my Tumblr (x). You can find me there to talk and things. Once you add me we are friends. No takebacks.
They’d just landed their helicopters twenty-four klicks from the city that they were supposed to converge with Bravo and Tango when things had seemed like something wasn’t quite right. Of course, it had been just a feeling- one that Ahsoka and Caleb would realize later that they should have paid more attention to- but one that Cody had mentioned how things hadn’t seemed quite right.
“You think something’s wrong but you can’t tell me what,” Krell had told him flatly, “You know as well as I do that’s not a reason to abandon a mission.”
“I’m telling you something is wrong,” Echo argued, “We should have already rendezvoused with our guides and they are nowhere to be found. We can’t go anywhere without them and if they aren’t here by 0500 then we are fucked. We won’t have the time to do what we need to and get out.”
“We’ve got,” Krell checked his watch, “Six minutes Kote. That’s plenty of time and- oh look there they are.”
Cody looked up at the arriving jeeps, eyebrows scrunching in confusion.
“They said we were supposed to have five jeeps and there are only four,” Cody said, “Where’s the last driver?”
“Dunno but once we’ve got Tango coming in with the armor vehicles we don’t have to worry about it,” Krell argued, “Besides there’s plenty of room. There’s only twelve of us Kote. Are you really going to let a little bit of the jitters stop you from doing your duty?”
“I’m telling you something is wrong,” Cody argued, “We should regroup and wait for more information to come in. We were supposed to be more spread out than this. It’s easier to take out a vehicle when someone is stuck in the middle like a sitting duck.”
“I’ll back whatever you want to do,” Knox told him, “If you think we shouldn’t go through with it then you’ve got seniority.”
“If we miss our chance now then Palpatine is going to get away again. If he makes it past the Iraq border into Saudia Arabia we’re fucked. We’re going to lose him again and whatever he’s got planning with that weapons deal is going to happen. That’s lives lost.”
“We’ll stay for now,” Cody directed, “But ask them why they are missing a person. I want to know what we’re getting into before we do anything.”
“I don’t like this,” Cody said as he looked around.
Most people were just walking around, doing whatever it was that they needed to do for the day but he clocked at least three separate people’s eyes lingering too long on the jeeps and he knew that something had to have been wrong.
“Alpha team, Delta team, break formation,” he demanded into his helmet’s mic, “Execute formation two now. We’ve been clocked.”
“What are you talking about?” Krell demanded into the mic, “Delta team, stay the course. Do not break formation.”
“Ahsoka swing the damn left now!” Cody yelled back as he saw two people in the distance begin to raise their guns, “Get the fuck outta here.”
“Get us out of here,” Cody demanded to the driver who was looking at the scene with wide eyes, “Go to formation two, now. That fifth driver ratted us out. They knew we were coming.”
Glass broke as the two men started shooting and Cody ducked down right in time for a bullet to fly through the headrest where he’d been just a moment before. Blood splatted across the car as the man in the driver’s seat took a bullet to the neck and there was screaming in the square.
“Fuck! Fuck!” Cody cursed, getting a hand on the steering wheel and jerking it to the right hard. The driver’s foot was on the pedal, speeding up the vehicle as he attempted to steer while staying low enough to avoid the spray of bullets.
“Fuck! Fuck! I think I’m hit!”
“Where are you guys?” Ahsoka’s voice rang through the speaker in Cody’s helmet and he cursed, swinging a left just in time to avoid a building.
“Get that fucking door open!” he called to Bo, looking over at the woman who was staring to her left, “Now!”
She shot up, leaning over the driver’s seat so she could open the door, and then Cody pushed the man, letting his body fall out so that he could take his place, sitting in the seat and looking up through the shattered windshield and slamming on the brakes, putting the car in reverse and turning back.
“Fuck I don’t know where we are anymore,” Cody told her, “I wasn’t looking where I was fucking going. TOC, do you have our location? Alpha and Delta TIC. Requesting Exfil. How long until we can get a helo out? We will meet you at Exfil point ASAP.”
“Alpha one status report,” Fox’s voice rang through the comms.
“They knew we were coming. Our mission has been compromised,” Cody told him, “We need to get out of here. Alpha five should already be redirected and on her way to you. We lost sight and I haven’t heard from the other two teams. Delta one and Delta eight were driving the other two vehicles. It’s bad Fox. We gotta-.”
There was a blinding light and then silence.
There was someone else near him, Cody knew, but it almost felt like he was underwater with how everything seemed too far away. He tried to open his eyes but his lids felt so heavy that he found he couldn’t even though he was sure he heard screaming and that he recognized the voice.
It was so silent, except for the ringing in his ears but he couldn’t lift a single finger, feeling so tired that he couldn’t fight it as he let unconsciousness take him once more.
The second time Cody woke up he managed to crack his eye open, only to look up at a sky tinted red. The ground felt hard beneath him, like has was lying on packed dirt but he was sure that the last time he’d been awake he’d been in the driver’s seat of an armored Jeep.
“He’s fucking alive.”
Cody heard the voice, thick with an accent, and tried to move his head but realized that it was impossible, neck so stiff that he couldn’t get the muscles to cooperate with him. There was the smell of smoke and burning flesh in the air and he tried to look around, seeing the smoke rising from the Jeep that had held his-.
He tried to jerk up, failing miserably and ending back on the ground with a painful thump.
“Don’t! Don’t! You can’t move,” a woman appeared in his line of vision, looking panicked.
Cody tried to speak but he couldn’t, throat feeling so dry that it seemed like he’d been out for hours, rather than the mere minutes it had probably been.
“We need to get him out of here,” the woman said to someone who was just out of his periphery.
“If we get caught-,” the man started to say.
“Then we will be dead,” she told him sharply, “But if we leave him here, he will be dead.”
“Damn it,” the man cursed and then said something in else- not in Arabic, although as dazed as he was it could have possibly been Sorani- and then he was gone. Cody tried desperately to stay awake but he was still dizzy and confused so when someone hooked arms under his shoulders he started to struggle, trying to get away even though he knew he wouldn’t be able to even stand by himself.
“Stop, you need to stop,” the woman was in front of him and Cody managed to open his eyes again blearily to look at her, “We are trying to help but we need to move fast.”
Cody looked over his shoulder to the jeep and realized in horror that it was on fire, the doors and most of the body blown to bits. He swung his head around.
“My- my team!” he yelled, “My team!”
“Shh, shh I’m sorry they are dead.”
Cody looked at the man who was trying to help him up. His expression was filled with pity and with a sinking feeling, he realized that the light he’d seen had to have been an explosion.
“We will explain but we need to get out of here,” the man told him, “The group that caused the explosion isn’t here but they will come to confirm that you are dead. We must go.”
Cody nodded, letting two of the men pull him up and leaning heavily on one of them as he swayed.
“We need to get out of here,” the woman said, “You can come with us to our home. We will hide you in the cellar.”
“Thank you,” Cody told her, looking into her eyes, “Thank you.”
“There was a bomb,” the woman told him as she handed him a clay cup filled with water, “If you hadn’t gone through the windshield I think you would have died with the rest of them. As it was you were launched about ten feet. It saved your life but it looks like you’ve got a concussion. I’m not sure what we might do. They’ve been making rounds for a few months now. Stealing and doing as they please. I’m not sure how we will get you out of here or how soon.”
“How long can I hide before it’s a danger to you?” Cody asked. If he could just heal enough to be able to think straight he might be able to make a run for it. All of his gear was gone and he didn’t have a way to signal for help but he could always make a run for it. The further he could get from where he was bordered by the Iran border the better his chances would be.
“We are in danger just hiding you as we are,” she told him, “But we will house you for as long as we can. Eventually, you will have to go. I don’t think they realized there was a person missing but you cannot hide forever. The longer you are here the more danger both of us are in.”
“I just need enough time to heal and then I will get to one of our outposts,” Cody promised, “Do you know which would be quicker for me? I need to either get to Al Jahra or Umm Qasr? I’d prefer to stay in the country but if you think I could get there faster I will find a way to slip into Kuwait.”
“Umm Qasr will be closer,” she confirmed, “It’s around sixty kilometres south of here.”
That was good. He’d been unconscious for most of the ride to wherever he was and he’d feared that he might be further than he’d wanted to be. He could work with sixty kilometres. He shut his eyes as a wave of dizziness overtook him.
Well, he could handle it in a few days. In the meantime, he’d have to take the time to try to shake off his injuries and get ready for the trek. He had a feeling that as soon as they realized they were missing a driver from one of the wrecks they’d be looking for him which meant that he didn’t have a whole lot of time.
“Give me a few days. Four max,” Cody promised, “And I’ll be gone. I don’t want you to get in trouble because of me.”
“You took quite a hit,” she looked at him and he was suddenly reminded of the way Obi-Wan looked at him when he’d tried a particularly stupid trick on his motorcycle.
Obi-Wan, he realized.
They would find the wreck and when they didn’t find Cody they would mark him down as MIA. Obi-Wan was going to have a heart attack and it would be all Cody’s fault.
He should have told Krell that he didn’t want to go through with it when he had a bad feeling. He didn’t even know if the other two vehicles got out, damn it.
This was a fucking mess, he realized.
But he didn’t have another choice.
All he could do was wait.
Chapter 4
Notes:
Hello Friends!
And we are right back in the water.Hope you enjoy!
-Marie
Chapter Text
Here be my tumblr (x).
Most days Obi-Wan didn’t feel like getting up anymore. He knew, of course, in the back of his mind that there were reasons to, it was just that in the haze of what his life had become it had seemed to escape him.
But he didn’t really have a choice. He had three kids to take care of and Cody wasn’t here to pick up the slack when Obi-Wan struggled anymore. And Echo needed to be taken to the doctor. It was a non-negotiable.
He wondered, a bit bitterly, how Jango was planning on paying for all of Echo’s needed treatment when he couldn’t hold a minimum wage job for more than a few months at a time.
“Echerem Fett?”
Obi-Wan looked up right as Echo winced. He was pretty sure that their parents had been drunk or high when they’d decided on the name because not only was it a name that almost no one had ever heard of, it was a primary girl’s name when it was used.
“He prefers Echo please,” Obi-Wan said smoothly as he helped the boy to stand up. Jango had never liked it much that all of his children had shortened their names but with the names that they’d been giving- much like Obi-Wan himself- he could understand how someone would want to shorten it.
Echo hid behind his legs, peaking out to look at the woman shyly as he smiled and crouched down.
“Sorry about that Echo,” she told him, “I’m Barriss. I’m a new nurse here. We’re going to get your height and weight and then Dr. Che will see you to talk about your progress okay?”
Echo clutched tighter to Obi-Wan’s legs and he sighed, putting a hand on the young boy’s back and rubbing gently, “Come on darling. It’s just your height and weight and then we can see Dr. Che, okay? You like Dr. Che.”
Echo nodded, curling to the side to lean against Obi-Wan as they both walked down the stark white hallway. The boy looked around curiously at the displays- which they seemed to change out with the seasons- while they walked down until they were at the end of the hallway. She led them into a room.
“You can leave your jacket and shoes here,” she told Echo, “And then I’ll take your measurements and we’ll come right back.”
Echo looked up at Obi-Wan who nudged him a bit, “It’s okay. I’ll be right here with you. We’ve done this before, remember?”
They’d done it many times as a matter of fact. Of course, it seemed that every time Echo had to deal with a new person- be it, doctor or nurse- he shrank right back into the bubble he preferred to live in most of the time.
Obi-Wan had always sworn that he was going to do something artistic one day whenever Cody would worry about it. The boy was already amazing with a set of crayons and Obi-Wan could see him going into something as an adult that would let him spend as much time in the clouds as he wanted.
“Okay just step on here for me,” she instructed and Echo followed her directions, refusing to let go of the hand Obi-Wan had given him as they started to walk out to the scale. She nodded, writing down the measurement, and then started to adjust the machine, taking his height.
“You’ve grown three inches since the last time we’ve seen you,” she told him brightly.
Echo nodded at her, looking back to Obi-Wan and he gave him what he hoped was a reassuring smile. The boy had always been a bit nervous but it seemed that Cody’s death had made him retreat into his shell even more than he had previously.
It was sad to see. Echo was normally bright and cheerful- at least when he was around people he knew- and this sad and sullen boy made Obi-Wan’s heart break. It hurt to know that he wasn’t the only person that couldn’t get past Cody’s death.
“Let’s go sit down shall we?” Obi-Wan asked, swinging their clasped hands gently, “And then I’m sure Dr. Che will tell us how much we need to adjust your braces, okay?”
He nodded, allowing Obi-Wan to lead him to the doctor’s room again and help him get situated on the table, squirming as the paper crinkled underneath him. Finally, once he seemed like he was comfortable, Obi-Wan took a seat in one of the two plastic chairs in the corner.
He wasn’t sure why he even looked. He knew that it would be something ridiculous and he wouldn’t want to know but it’d been nagging him ever since Cody’s death.
He wanted to know- exactly- how much he’d be paying for Echo’s care would be without the insurance the military provided.
He couldn’t even comprehend it as he looked at the itemized bill. It couldn’t really be possible. None of it made sense. How could one doctor’s visit end up being over a thousand dollars? That just couldn’t be right. They’d adjusted his braces and ordered two screws to replace some of the ones that were wearing. It couldn’t have possibly added up to the bill he was looking at.
$1295.04
Were they out of their fucking minds? This whole time he’d been thinking that Jango couldn’t possibly afford to take care of his kids but if Obi-Wan lost his insurance- even for the short time it would take them to move over to his- he wouldn’t be able to afford to take care of them.
It was just so much to handle, on top of everything else. There was still so much to do and he didn’t know what he was going to do about half of it.
That was how he found himself sitting in his and Cody’s shared closet, clutching one of his Christmas sweaters and sobbing as the reality finally really sunk in for him. He couldn’t believe this was happening.
It was a good thing that the kids were out of the house- probably making a mess with Luke and Leia in Anakin and Ahsoka’s kitchen if he had to guess- and that they weren’t there to see him break down for what seemed like the hundredth time this week.
It was just every time he felt like he had his head above water something came out of nowhere to shove him back under. He wasn’t sure how much more he could stand before he finally just decided to stop treading water.
He looked on top of the drawers to see the picture of him and Cody at their wedding- Rex standing proudly as the ring bearer- and wondered when he was finally going to be able to get up without feeling like something had punched out his chest.
Crying wasn’t going to help him, he knew. He pressed his face back into Cody’s sweater and breathed in. It still smelled like the man’s cologne and faintly of the deodorant he preferred.
It smelled like home. Like their bed did when Cody would finally be home and it had been another bout of crying when he’d gone to lay down one night and realized their sheets no longer smelled of his husband. It just seemed like for every day that passed, Cody’s memory fell further and further behind and Obi-Wan wasn’t ready to let the man go. He didn’t know when he’d ever be ready to let the man go.
Healing didn’t seem to be an option when every turn he made he was faced with Cody’s ghost.
He couldn’t even take off his wedding ring. He’d tried to leave it behind one day and hadn’t even made it down the porch stairs of their house before he’d begun hyperventilating and had to turn back for it.
It wasn’t something he wanted the kids to see but he knew that there wasn’t a way to hide everything from them. He sometimes wondered who was more haunted. He’d been with Cody for nearly ten years but Rex had been with him for nearly his whole life and the twins wouldn’t have been able to remember a time without the man.
He was their whole world and Obi-Wan wondered some days if it might have been better if they’d lost him instead. Cody was their brother- the only family they had, the one adult- who had taken care of them even when no one else wanted to.
And now all four of them had to live without him.
He clutched the sweater closer to him, even as he moved to stand.
There was so much to do. He needed to figure out dinner for when the kids returned and there were dishes that he’d been putting off all week plus laundry for all of them that he had to do if they wanted clothes to wear.
And paperwork and appeals and MLS sheets and finances to look over and-.
God, he wished everything would just stop.
It was too much. It was more than he could handle. He didn’t know what to do when they’d only done so well because they were a team. For God’s sake, Obi-Wan worked as a part-time in-person teacher so he could be home with the kids when Cody was gone. He hadn’t actually worked a full day since six months after they’d been married. How was he going to work full-time and have time for the kids- who weren’t even in kindergarten yet- and cook and do all of the things that he’d been doing? How much would it cost to put the kids in full-time daycare? Even with half a day, Obi-Wan had thought it was a little steep and if the navy hadn’t been subsidizing it then he would have insisted on just quitting and finding a job working from home full time.
He kind of wished he had done that. Because then he would have already been at home and he wouldn’t be stuck with a job he had to go into. He wouldn’t be able to afford the lapse of insurance- just the thought gave him anxiety- if he were to move jobs now but to go into the office full-time would mean that he wouldn’t be able to just pick the kids up when he needed and- and-.
He didn’t even know where to start.
Except, he guessed he had to start somewhere and there was only one place he could.
He walked out into the kitchen, sitting at the island as he stared down at the MLS sheet that Ahsoka had printed out for him. It was a home a half-hour away- farther than he’d like, but not far enough to make him feel as though he couldn’t make it work.
The house was beautiful. She’d been right about that. It was huge, definitely enough room for all of them but it was one thing to stay with Anakin for a day or two when they were both missing their family and entirely another thing to live with them permanently.
It wasn’t like he had many options though, as it were and he was going to run out of time sooner or later. He’d been approved for a measly hundred thousand dollars and he wouldn’t be able to find a condo for that. With the sale of his house, he might be able to stretch it to two hundred but he’d be strapped for cash and if they really did lose their insurance then he’d be struggling to pay for Echo’s care, not to mention it was hard enough to buy a house right now. He wasn’t sure if he’d be able to get an offer contingent on his home selling accepted. It seemed like it would probably be impossible.
He picked up the phone, letting it ring as he stuck the phone between his ear and shoulder and flipped through the house listing once more.
Ahsoka picked up on the third ring, seeming a little distracted, which meant the kids had to have been making a mess in the kitchen. If the noise was anything to go by then it was a definite.
“Obi?” she asked and he heard as she left whatever was going on in the kitchen, the background noise fading out as she walked away.
“I’ve been approved for around a hundred thousand,” Obi-Wan said, not bothering to say hello. Greetings were meant for people who had all the time in the world and if Cody’s death had taught him anything, it was that no one had as much time as they’d thought, “I could probably get approved for two hundred once I sell the house. Do you think that would be enough?”
“Wh- oh! Yeah definitely,” she told him, “We only need about another twenty thousand to be eligible.”
“And- what- what would the payment look like for that?” he asked tiredly as he grabbed the calculator from the counter, “Because the kids are going to need full-time daycare now and I’m not sure-.”
“Well maybe Anakin can watch them for half the day,” Ahsoka suggested, “You know he already has Luke and Leia for half the day. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind.”
“Well you’d better talk to him before you just offer him up,” Obi-Wan warned her, “There’s a big difference between two and four kids Ahsoka.”
“I’ll talk to him,” she promised, “We were thinking of splitting the costs three ways so it would come out to about a thousand dollars a month plus utilities. It’s definitely cheaper than any apartment we could find. We pay like twenty-five hundred for this place and it’s only got three bedrooms. Honestly, if Anakin wasn’t in IT then we’d be fucked.”
“Yeah I know the feeling,” he muttered as he started scratching things down, “That would leave me with a little under fifteen hundred for everything else. It would be tight but I could make that work.”
“We could also pay a little more until your life insurance pays out Obi-Wan,” Ahsoka suggested gently, “We are already paying twelve fifty each here so we could keep paying that until you get back on your feet and start making a full-time income.”
“Then there would be no point to moving,” Obi-Wan argued, “It’s supposed to be cheaper for all of us. Hell, it will be cheaper than keeping this place by myself.”
“It’s so that we’ve got more room to grow and because the kids want a garden and chickens,” Ahsoka corrected, “Anakin also promised them a barn cat by the way. I hope you don’t mind because it’s way too late to talk them out of it.”
“I don’t want to be a burden,” Obi-Wan argued weakly.
“Then you can help us when you sell your house by putting the money towards the new one to lower the monthly payment,” Ahsoka suggested, “And that won’t take long at all. You’re in a desirable location with an affordable house. And Cody’s done a lot of work on it. It’s really nice now and it will probably have a lot of equity.”
“I- okay,” Obi-Wan agreed, “We can put it towards the new mortgage. How soon do you think we can settle if our offer is accepted?”
“Well it’s been on the market for a while,” Ahsoka explained, “Because it was subdivided and now it needs its own hookup so the sale wouldn’t go through until a least six months.”
“Ahsoka I’m supposed to be out of the housing in six months,” Obi-Wan said, rubbing his forehead, “And they told me that three weeks ago.”
“You know as well as I do that it’s a suggestion,” Ahsoka told him seriously, “They’ve let widows live in those houses for years Obi-Wan. They have to say that because it’s how things work but they aren’t just going to kick you out.”
“I know, I know, I just feel like-,” Obi-Wan stopped, sighing, “I don’t know how I feel anymore.”
“Well then let’s take it one step at a time,” Ahsoka suggested softly, “Let’s add you to our pre-approval and then put the offer in.”
“Okay,” Obi-Wan agreed, “Why don’t you give me the guy’s number?”
Chapter 5
Notes:
Hello Friends!
I'd like to say I'm sorry but... I'm really not.Enjoy!
Marie
Chapter Text
This be my tumblr (x). I do things there.
Obi-Wan barely heard the door swing open.
There were soft footsteps, muffled by the carpet, and then Obi-Wan was staring at the blurry legs that were positioned in front of him.
He wiped at his eyes, realizing that at some point he’d started to cry, his face crumbling again as Ahsoka sat down in front of him, legs crossed and hands on her knees.
“Obi-Wan?”
“I- I can’t,” Obi-Wan told her, voice hoarse, “I- I can’t do this. It feels like…”
He looked up to the side table, tears falling down his face as he looked at the messy surface. He looked at it, taking stock of what was covering it.
The coins and bits of paper, a book, two half-empty water bottles, a pair of reading glasses, his allergy medication, a couple of pencils, and a small clay sculpture that Obi-Wan remembered Echo telling them was a mug.
Obi-Wan had always teased his normally very organized husband about the hurricane of bits that had always covered his nightstand, nagging him occasionally to clear off the half-drunk water bottles that always started to clutter it.
Now, Obi-Wan couldn’t imagine touching anything that was on there.
So he hadn’t.
He’d left every single penny, every single paper scrap, and straw wrapper in its place, hoping that if he didn’t move anything that time might freeze.
That it might turn back the clock and his husband would walk in and laugh at him, maybe drop a few more coins on the surface and kiss Obi-Wan, maybe promise to clear off the water bottles before he went on his next deployment.
“It feels like erasing him,” Obi-Wan finally told her brokenly, “Like I’m getting rid of my husband. I- I can’t do it.”
“Obi-Wan you have to start somewhere,” Ahsoka reminded him quietly, “The realtor said that professional photos are only useful when the house looks nice. You promised to get things cleaned up, remember?”
“I hate this,” Obi-Wan choked out, “I hate this. How am I- He wants me to clean out half of the house but I’d rather throw everything of mine in the dumpster than get rid of Cody’s things. I- I can’t- I’m not ready to let him go.”
“We don’t have to get rid of it. We can always just put it in storage if you aren’t ready to go through it all.”
“I’m- I don’t feel like I’ll ever be ready to go through it. What’s the difference between packing it away to never be seen again and just- just giving it away? Either way, he’s not-,” Obi-Wan stopped, voice catching in his throat.
“I’m sorry Obi,” Ahsoka said softly, “I wish that this wasn’t happening but it is. You can’t just- you can’t avoid it forever.”
“I don’t want to avoid it forever!” Obi-Wan snapped at her, “It’s- it’s barely been a month and- it’s not fair! It’s not fair, Ahsoka! And I know that the world isn’t fair and that I shouldn’t expect it to be but why does Bariss get her husband’s body back and to move on with Hera’s husband and I get-? I get jack shit! I get-!”
Obi-Wan stopped, chest feeling like it was caving in on itself. He pressed his forehead against his knees, arms coming around his legs so he could curl up tighter.
“I- I don’t know what to say,” Ahsoka admitted honestly, “But you have to start somewhere. Why don’t we start somewhere else? Maybe the bathroom?”
“Yeah- yeah okay,” Obi-Wan agreed, letting Ahsoka help him up and stumbling after him to the bathroom, eyeing the box in her hands warily.
Much like the rest of the house, nothing in Obi-Wan’s bathroom had moved. It looked like time had frozen, Cody’s toothbrush still perched on the edge of the sink instead of where it should be in the cup, his shaving cream still tucked into the weird alcove to the right that he’d always promised they’d eventually turn into a medicine cabinet.
Obi-Wan stepped forward, wiping away a tear and taking a breath to steady himself as he made his way to the shower, pulling a few bottles to stack in the box, even as Ahsoka’s expression turned confused.
“What are you doing?” she asked.
“I’m putting the unused toiletries away,” Obi-Wan said, shoving another container into the box, “What else would I be doing?”
“Last time I checked you don’t use Shea Moisture,” Ahsoka told him flatly.
“And how would you know?” Obi-Wan snapped back, “I think I know which one is being used and which one isn’t.”
“Obi-Wan, it's for curly hair,” Ahsoka sighed, “I helped him pick it out. He needed a recommendation because the one that he was using was recalled. I’m the one who told him to use it. Why are you putting your stuff in the box?”
“I’m not using my own anymore,” Obi-Wan finally admitted, standing up straight and walking over to the sink, “I started using his shampoo and body wash, okay? Why can’t you just leave it alone?”
“Okay fine,” Ahsoka replied, voice soft, “If that’s what you want.”
Obi-Wan’s breath stuck in his chest as he watched Ahsoka clear off the shelf next to the sink, chest getting tighter and tighter as Cody’s shaving cream and electric razor, face wash, and toothbrush made their way into the box.
“Obi-Wan?”
Obi-Wan backed up against the door, sliding down until he was sitting, chest starting to ache as his lungs started to burn.
“Breathe Obi-Wan.”
Obi-Wan looked up into warm brown eyes as two hands took his, Cody’s concerned face only a few inches from his. For a second he couldn’t breathe for a completely different reason and then hands were squeezing his and he dragged air into his lungs, feeling like something was sitting on his chest, even as he looked into Cody’s calm gaze.
Obi-Wan forced the breath from his chest, shakily sucking in another one as Cody gave him a small smile.
“That’s it, Obi,” he said, “Everything is okay. You’re okay.”
Obi-Wan followed the man’s steady, calm breaths until his chest loosened and the dizziness faded, grimacing up at him.
“I’m sorry,” he apologized, “It’s stupid. I shouldn’t have even come- it’s dumb.”
Obi-Wan made a small noise of surprise as Cody tugged on his hands, pulling him up, and then pressing him into the door behind them, a serious look on his face.
“Don’t say that. Nothing that you do is stupid. You’re one of the smartest people I’ve ever met,” Cody said seriously, “If you’ve got something to say, I know that there’s a reason. Please. Tell me what’s wrong.”
Obi-Wan’s heart felt like it was beating out of his chest and he didn’t know whether or not he was imagining the feeling of heat radiating from Cody’s body or if the man was just that warm all the time. His eyes were clear and serious, lips soft-looking, even with the harsh line that they’d formed.
“I just- I know that Elodie asked you out,” Obi-Wan admitted, hoping that his face wasn’t as red as it felt, “And I- I just wanted to- I think it’s a bad idea! I don’t think that she’s right for you and she’s such- she can be such a jerk and I think that you deserve more than that! I- I don’t want you to settle. Not when-.”
“Not when what?” Cody asked, voice softer.
The tone and the warmth of Cody pressed against him coaxed the words that he’d been choking on for so long from his throat even as he started to panic that he would destroy everything as they fell from his lips.
“Not when I love you!” Obi-Wan finally blurted out, body tensing as he waited for the yelling.
“You- you love me?”
Cody’s voice was so earnest that Obi-Wan couldn’t stay quiet.
“Of course I do,” Obi-Wan admitted, “How could anyone not love you? You’re- you’re perfect. And Elodie, she’s- not. She’s such a jerk and she only wants to date you because you’re being recruited for the minor leagues and I don’t-. You’re so much more than a free ride. I don’t want anyone to do that to you.”
“I told her no,” Cody said, sounding breathless and then he surged forward, mouth colliding with Obi-Wan’s in a rough, open-mouthed, and slightly off-center kiss, both of his hands cupping Obi-Wan’s face as he pressed him completely against the door.
The sound of the knob hitting the wall shook Obi-Wan out of his stupor and he started to kiss Cody back, his own arms wrapping around the man’s neck as hands slid down his neck and chest, settling on his thighs as he pulled one of Obi-Wan’s legs around his hip.
“I can’t forget him,” Obi-Wan said, voice rough, “Not even for a second. I can’t look at anything and not see him. Every single second of everyday that’s all I remember. I can’t- Getting rid of his stuff is erasing him for everyone else. And then all there will be is me and a stupid fucking flag and a lot of what-ifs. I don’t know if I can live with the what-ifs.”
Obi-Wan looked up at her, eyes wet as he started to cry again.
“I don’t want to do this,” he told her, voice breaking, “I don’t want to do this without him.”
“Obi-Wan-,” Ahsoka started to say but Obi-Wan was already shaking his head, arms wrapped around himself.
“No. No! I can’t do this,” he told her desperately, “I can’t do this right now. Tell him to cancel the damn photographer. I’m not doing this! I’m not-.”
He dragged himself up off the floor, taking the box from her and shoving it down on the floor.
“Get out.”
“What? Obi-Wan you can’t-.”
“Get out!” he screamed at her, “Get out, get out, get out! I’m not doing this! I’m not doing any of this damn it! Fuck this, fuck the navy, fuck the world, and- and fuck you! Fuck you because you came home and he didn’t! You left him behind!”
“Obi-Wan there wasn’t anything to-,” Ahsoka started to say, her own voice crumbling.
“He wouldn’t have ever left you behind!” Obi-Wan snapped at her, as he started to cry harder, “He never could have left you or anyone else there! And that’s why he’s dead! He’s dead because he loved you all more than he loved me! You were more important than coming home to me!”
“Obi-Wan, please,” Ahsoka pleaded quietly with him, tears falling down her face, “You’re hurting, I know-.”
“You don’t know!” Obi-Wan yelled hoarsely, “You don’t know and Sabine doesn’t know and nobody knows! Because I got a fucking medal! I’ve got a medal and a flag and that medal means that he saved you! It means he saved you and he died in a dusty, shitty town full of people who hated him and wanted him dead and his last day on earth was the day you guys left him behind!”
“Obi-Wan-.”
“Get out!” Obi-Wan shouted and then quieter, “Please. Just leave. Just leave me alone. I can’t do this right now.”
“I don’t want to leave you like this,” Ahsoka told him softly, “Please don’t shut me out.”
Obi-Wan shook his head, “I- I can’t even look at you right now. Please just leave me be. Every time I look at you it hurts.”
Ahsoka took a step forward and Obi-Wan flinched back, letting his legs finally collapse so that he was a heap on the floor. He closed his eyes, listening to the sound of footsteps as they left. The sound got faint and then there was the sound of a car and Obi-Wan was alone.
Chapter 6
Notes:
Hello Friends!
I hope you enjoy this chapter! It's gonna hurt a little bit, ngl but we'll get through it together!~Marie
Chapter Text
This is my Tumblr (x) in case you don't hate me after this.
It seemed that the more days that passed by, the more Obi-Wan felt like there were magnets in his bed. Sometimes it felt like an Olympic feat just to drag himself out of the covers.
The first time he’d laid in his bed and grabbed Cody’s favourite sweater to find that it no longer smelled like him, was possibly the worst day he’d had since finding out the news and he hadn’t been able to help the tears that had come once he’d realized that soon, nothing in the house would smell like his husband any longer.
After that, it had gotten nearly impossible to even just drag himself up long enough to get the kids ready and to school. By the time he’d gotten back from it, his body was so heavy that it was all he could do to collapse in bed and lay down until it was finally time to pick them back up again and he’d started to struggle just doing the regular chores around the house.
If it wasn’t for Ahsoka occasionally coming and helping him with the laundry and the trash and the dishes, Obi-Wan wasn’t sure that he’d get anything done at all.
He’d even started to order food out so that he didn’t have to worry about it anymore, even though he knew with every dollar he spent he was digging into savings that he really shouldn’t be touching and the paralyzing fear of not being able to pay his bills made it nearly impossible to even just get up in the morning.
So he didn’t, at least not when he didn’t have to. It didn’t matter that he needed to shower or that the sheets were getting smelly and it definitely didn’t matter that his laundry was stacking up since he didn’t really even go out that much anymore.
He’d know, of course, that eventually he’d have to start actually working to fix things again but he couldn’t, not while just a glance over at Cody’s side table reduced him to tears and the sight of his husband’s dress blues in the closet was enough to make his legs collapse out from under him.
“Obi?”
Obi-Wan groaned slightly, poking his head out from under the blanket to peer blurrily at the tiny boy ducking his head around the door, feet shuffling nervously along the carpeted hall floor.
“Jesse, what’s wrong?” he asked, voice soft and hoarse, “Is everyone alright?”
“Everyone’s fine,” Jesse assured him, “It’s just- well Auntie Soka and Uncle Ani are here and Auntie Soka said that she was taking Leia and Luke to the movies to see the new Trolls movie and that we could go if you said yes.”
Obi-Wan braced himself on his elbow as he sat up, “Yes of course dear. If you all want to go then go ahead. Just let me grab my wallet and I’ll be right out, alright?”
“No need. Snips will take care of it. Just go ahead kiddo.”
“Thanks, Uncle Ani!” Jesse replied excitedly and then Obi-Wan could hear the sound of feet running down the hall and scrambling down the stairs, and then small, excited voices were carrying from the first floor as Jesse relayed the news.
Obi-Wan listened intently as the door shut and then immediately collapsed back into the bed.
“Did you forget I was here?”
“I didn’t forget,” Obi-Wan replied with a sigh, “I just- I don’t know what you want me to say. I told her I was sorry. I didn’t mean it like that, it’s- it’s just been a lot.”
“That’s not why I’m here,” Anakin said, voice firm, “I’m here because you need to get your house cleaned for photos. C’mon. You need to get up.”
“I’m not getting the photos taken,” Obi-Wan told him seriously, “I’ve already talked with the photographer and-.”
“I talked to your real estate agent and rescheduled them for next week,” Anakin cut in, “We’re getting things cleaned up and then they’re going to take the photos.”
Obi-Wan sat up, “Anakin I said I’m not-.”
“You are,” Anakin said seriously and then he turned, walking towards the closet.
Obi-Wan was up and out of bed the moment that Anakin pulled the first hanger out of the closet, one of Cody’s navy t-shirts dangling from it. He tried to grab the hanger but Anakin held it out of his reach, kicking an empty box over and sliding it off in one smooth motion so that the shirt fell into it.
“Stop! What are you doing?” Obi-Wan snapped angrily at him, pushing at him as he started to pull more clothing out of the closet, even as Anakin easily held him back, “Stop! I said leave it alone!”
“You can’t leave it alone anymore Obi-Wan!” Anakin snarled back at him, “You can’t! Everyone is tiptoeing around you, letting you wallow in pity but you don’t have time to grieve! I’m sorry! You’ve got a house you need to be out of and insurance you have to change over and paperwork that needs to be done and- and kids who need to be taken care of! You need to start doing something! I’m sorry! I didn’t want him to die any more than you did but you can’t just freeze like time isn’t moving around you!”
“Yes, I-,” Obi-Wan struggled against him desperately, tears starting to fall as more and more clothing was shoved into the box, “It’s not your-!”
“I’m sorry but you don’t have time to grieve right now!” Anakin told him again, “You can’t!”
“Why do you get to decide that?” Obi-Wan screamed at him, heaving in breaths as he started to cry harder, “It’s my life, damn it! Are you saying you wouldn’t be grieving if it was Ahsoka?”
“Of course, I would!” Anakin snapped back at him, “But I wouldn’t stop living Obi-Wan! You can’t pretend like life isn’t happening around you.”
Anakin pulled back so fast that Obi-Wan nearly fell over, jerking back and moving towards the bed. Obi-Wan moved quicker than he could ever remember moving when Anakin’s hand started to push at the stuff on Cody’s side table.
His fist collided with the man’s face before he’d even registered what was happening, the sight of it blurry as he continued to sob, shaking as anger started to take over.
“Don’t touch that!” Obi-Wan yelled, “Don’t fucking touch that! It’s not-!”
“He’s not coming back!” Anakin screamed back at him, “He’s not coming back to you Obi-Wan! You can’t pretend like he is! You can’t grieve right now! You can grieve when you know where you’re going to live and how you’re going to pay for it and once Echo has the insurance that he needs but you can’t right now!”
Anakin sighed harshly, voice hoarse even as he softened it, “He’s dead, Obi-Wan. You haven’t even said the words yet. Not once. He’s gone. He’s not coming back. You have to admit it to yourself.”
“I know that!” Obi-Wan snapped back at him, heaving in breaths between his sobs, “I- Don’t you think I know that? I know he’s not- he’s not-.”
“Say it,” Anakin demanded, “Say it, Obi-Wan. He’s dead. He’s not coming back.”
“I- I- know,” Obi-Wan said, “I- I can’t- I can’t-.”
He couldn’t breathe, his chest was tight and it felt like his throat was closing as he started to cry harder.
Because he knew.
His husband was- he was-.
“He’s dead,” Obi-Wan managed to bite out, “I know he’s dead. You don’t have to tell me but that- that doesn’t mean-. This isn’t fair.”
“None of this is fair,” Anakin reminded him, “But that doesn’t mean that you can ignore it. You are hurting yourself and honestly- maybe that would be alright if it was just you. But it’s not. You’ve got Jesse and Echo and Rex and they are counting on you and you- Jesse said you haven’t gotten out of bed in days Obi-Wan. You- You can’t just keep ordering takeout and driving them to preschool and then never getting out of bed. It isn’t’ healthy. You’ve got a man trying to take your kids from you and you won’t even get out of bed.”
“I- I can’t do this without him,” Obi-Wan said, voice cracking, “I- I don’t know how to do this without him. He’s- he’s always been here, even if he wasn’t here. And I’m- I’m on my own now. I don’t want to be on my own. I don’t know how.”
Obi-Wan let out another sob as he was pulled against Anakin’s chest, the man’s tight grip on him causing a whole new wave of tears. His chest ached so bad that Obi-Wan wanted to claw at it, to pull his heart out so that it wasn’t attached to cause him any more pain.
“Cody’s dead,” Obi-Wan sobbed, “He’s dead and I’m alone and I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what to-. Please. No one ever told me what to do.”
“You’re not alone,” Anakin promised, “You’ve got me and Ahsoka to help you. You’ve got friends who want to help if you’d just let them. We’re going to get you through this but you gotta stop pretending like it isn’t happening.”
“I- I don’t know where to start,” Obi-Wan bit out, “Cody was my whole world. He was all that I had. I- I loved him.”
“He’s not all you had,” Anakin reminded him, sniffling himself, “You’ve got people here. You’ve got three kids who love you more than anything and don’t know what life would be like without you, Obi. You can’t just forget about them. I know you miss him. We all miss him. But you need to keep going.”
“I don’t want to stop grieving,” Obi-Wan said, voice small, “If I stop grieving then it will be like he didn’t exist. He’ll- He’ll really be- he’ll really be dead, Ani. I can’t- I can’t live-.”
“You aren’t living right now either, Obi,” Anakin told him seriously, “You’re just existing. You’ve got your whole life ahead of you. Don’t give up this chance. Cody wouldn’t want to see you give up this chance.”
“I would have rather it’d been me,” Obi-Wan told him brokenly, “Cody- Cody would have known what to do. He was good under pressure and he- he always had a plan and- Anakin- I- I don’t have a plan. I don’t know what to do. And everyone knows it. Even the kids- they know it. They- they lost their brother and now they're stuck with me.”
“They aren’t stuck with you Obi-Wan,” Anakin said seriously, “They love you. You’ve been with them for as long as they can remember. You were married to Cody for six years, Obi. They can’t remember a time without you. They would have been just as devastated to lose you. This- Nothing about this is right but they wouldn’t trade you for Cody. None of us would trade you for Cody and not- not because we didn’t love Cody but because we love you too. You were just as important.”
“I- Nothing feels important anymore,” Obi-Wan murmured into his chest, “Nothing feels okay anymore.”
“I know. And I’m sorry. This wasn’t fair and you didn’t deserve it but this is what you were given, Obi-Wan. You need to keep going.”
“I’m so tired,” Obi-Wan admitted, “And scared. I’m so scared. What am I going to do if Jango wins? I don’t have the money to fight him and he- he won’t take care of them and I- I’ll lose everything. If he takes them then I really will have lost everything.”
“He isn’t going to get them,” Anakin promised, “They’re yours and there isn’t a single time when a parent whose rights were terminated got their children back. And I know that Virginia isn’t the greatest LGBT supporter, Obi-Wan, but- they can’t do this. Not when a federal court would overrule it in a heartbeat.”
“I used to think that it wasn’t possible that Cody would leave me,” Obi-Wan’s throat felt dry, “But things happened and here I am all alone. I- I have never had the greatest luck, Ani.”
“I know,” Anakin tightened his grip around Obi-Wan, “And I know that it feels like things won’t ever get better but we’re here and we want to help and the- the first thing we have to do is get your house ready for the real estate agent’s photographer to come through. I know you don’t want to but you can’t afford to keep the house by yourself. I know it hurts and I know that you don’t want to lose something that reminds you of Cody but we don’t have a choice. You can only stay in housing if you’re married so me and Soka can’t help you here.”
“I know,” Obi-Wan admitted, leaning harder into Anakin’s chest, “I know. Just- not the side table. We- we can work on something else but- I- I just need that to stay there for a little longer. Please.”
“We’ll start somewhere else,” Anakin agreed, “As long as we start somewhere.”
Chapter 7
Notes:
Hello Friends!
So this chapter has to start with an apology. I had everything planned out for how exactly it was supposed to go and it was probably going to be awesome but I lost the notes and had to just try to get all my information from past chapters so I kind of had to be a lot vaguer than was the original plan. Hopefully, at least it's still okay.There were originally ten chapters planned for this story so that's what I'm going to put down for, but as a fair warning, it might be eleven or twelve because according to what notes I could find, I seem to have deviated ever so slightly so I may have to wrap up a little more than previously thought. XD
Anyway, I know it's been a whole ass lifetime since the last update on this so hopefully, someone out there is still following it. Lmao.
Hope You Enjoy!
Marie
Chapter Text
This be my tumblr (x) if you are interested. It's all Star Wars, all the time be warned. Lmao.
They tried, but in the end, Cody didn’t actually end up getting four days.
The woman’s two children traded off in bringing him what food they could spare, always packed in between the food for the chickens that were running around the shed that he was in so that no one would know what they were doing.
One of the younger girls, Sara, who couldn’t have been more than five or six, had become almost enamoured with him, offering to bring him food and water, and then staying out with him for as long as the family would allow, asking the kinds of questions that only children asked.
What colour was Cody’s favourite? What was his favourite animal? Had he ever seen her favourite animal—a giant panda—in person?
“Orange,” Cody explained, “Although I’m partial to a specific shade of blue too. And my favorite animal is a komodo dragon. And I’ve seen a panda bear in a zoo, but never in their natural habitat.”
“I read about them in a book,” she told him excitedly, pulling out a rough-looking picture book that looked like something one might buy from a scholastic fair and he couldn’t help but wonder if she’d gotten in from a donation and how, “See? They are right here.”
She showed him the torn page, the words ‘Giant Panda’ in giant block letters.
“I’ve seen them before,” he agreed, “They are very big. And not as white as you think they should be.”
“What color are they-?” she started to ask, only to be interrupted by the sound of someone calling her name, “Oh. I’ve to go. But I’ll be back tomorrow. To bring you more food and hear more about the pandas.”
“Sounds great,” Cody said, closing his eyes against the shooting pain that had started to form in the back of his head, the world starting to spin from being upright and trying to focus too much.
It was less than a day later when he heard the commotion outside.
Shouting and crying and shooting and screaming mixed into some sort of terror-drenched echo in the back of his skull to jackhammer at his already aching head, the sound ringing in the air like the airhorn that had always sounded in their camp when they needed to take cover.
The woman came running into the storage shed that Cody was hiding out in only a few moments later, the look of urgency on her face telling Cody everything that he needed to know.
“I’ve got to go,” he said, “Give me a second.”
“Are you sure you’ll make it?” she asked, sounding apprehensive, “You’re still not fully healed. Who knows whether you will make it more than a few hundred metres? Maybe we can hide you in the shelter under the house.”
“If they find me out there I’ll be dead. If they find me in here, we’ll all be dead,” Cody told her firmly, “You and your family have done more than you should have. More than a lot of people in your position would have. I can’t stay and put you in any more danger. If I’m half the soldier I’m supposed to be, then I’ll be just fine.”
“That’s not comforting when you already almost died. But you are right. We don’t have time. Here.” She handed him a bag. “Take this with you. It should be enough food for at least a few days and enough water for four. I’m sorry. That’s all we have to give you.”
“It’s more than I should ask for,” Cody told her seriously, standing up even as his head started to spin, “I’ll be just fine. I don’t suppose you know which direction I should be going. I could use the stars given enough time but-.”
There was the loud sound of a door being kicked down and they both froze for a moment, listening for a minute before realizing that it was the house next to them. Her face turned panicked.
“I’ve got to go. Which direction?” Cody asked, “Tell me, please.”
“Go out the back way and start going straight,” she told him softly, “There are hills back there that you’ll be able to hide in. If you just keep following the nearby road, you’ll be fine but you have to be careful. There are checkpoints on the roads and so at some point, you’ll have to go around them. Don’t get lost. If you get lost, you’re going to have a hard time finding your way back.”
Cody took the bag as there was shouting and pleading in a language that he didn’t understand, nodding to her and slipping out the back without another word.
He stayed pressed flat against the building as voices sounded close by and he watched a few men with automatic guns leaving the house, yelling back and forth to each other as they started towards the front of the house where Sara and her family were in.
As soon as they were out of sight he made a run for it with only the light of the stars and moon above him to illuminate his way, pushing through the dizziness to get to the hills that she was talking about, getting up and over the first with little fanfare before collapsing down on the other side, leaning against the rough sand and rock as he caught his breath.
He moved the bag in front of him, pulling things out to see what he had to work with.
He was surprised to see his radio in there, looking worse for wear but possibly functional if he could get close enough and one of his handguns. It wouldn’t be worth shit against a machine gun but at least if he ran into a single person he might stand a chance.
There was enough food for a full week, just like she’d said, and he thought he could probably make the water last two days if he was careful.
It was more than he’d thought he’d have and he zipped the bag back up, standing so that he could start to run once more, knowing that he didn’t have time to just sit around.
He sent a prayer to whatever god was supposedly listening that the group who was raiding houses wouldn’t find a trace of him so that the family that was there would be safe.
It was another five days before Cody was anywhere near civilization and part of him couldn’t help but wonder if it would be a mistake to step foot in there.
Except he was out of water and almost out of food and he could see the beginnings of a few markets that if he could stop in would be his best bet.
He’d been given civilian clothes by one of the men who’d lived in the household and without knowing where he was from, he wasn’t sure anyone would realize that he was an American, so long as they spoke Arabic and he could convince them that at worst, he was from a neighbouring country.
He kept his head down as he walked into the small town, careful not to draw any more attention to himself than necessary. Luckily, it was easy enough in the fairly busy hour of the day, people too concerned with stopping at stalls and businesses to care about a single man walking around minding his own business.
He bought what he could without looking too suspicious, hoping that the quantities wouldn’t raise any flags as he spoke to one of the stall owners, bartering him down the best he could so that he could reserve some of the money that he had.
He managed to get in and out without drawing too many eyes, looking at the signs to see where he was and hoping that his sense of direction and memory was as good as it could have been despite the pounding headache and the fact that he was almost as dizzy as he’d been the first day of the crash.
He didn’t have time to stop and rest and he definitely didn’t have time to linger in a town that would start to question his presence.
He was too far out for Palpatine to have much of a reach, but that would quickly change if the man figured out that not only Cody was alive but he was heading towards a base. As soon as he was sure that Cody was alive he’d start coming full force, instead of just sending a few men out and Cody was barely staying ahead as it was.
It wasn’t hard to stumble upon the checkpoints that the woman had warned him about, but Cody had at least hoped that they would be nearby a town so that he might be able to use it to get his bearings after going around.
He hadn’t been so lucky and so he’d been forced to just walk in the other direction, going to the west in the hopes that he’d eventually be able to reroute himself with something.
Two days later—when he was again almost completely out of food and waterless once more—he finally found a river and couldn’t help the excitement that filled his chest, though he tried to tamp it down.
He knew that river and if he was right, he might be able to hit the naval base before he hit the base. If he could make it to the naval base then they’d be able to escort him to the base and he wouldn’t have to make the full sixty-kilometer journey.
The water was brackish and unhelpful but Cody noticed that there seemed to be a little town in the distance and if he could just get to one more store he was sure that he’d be able to get enough to make the final leg of his journey.
There was yelling but Cody didn’t know what anyone was saying.
All he could focus on was the way that his head was pounding and how much it hurt to try to open his eyes. The voices sounded incredulous but he couldn’t remember why that would have been.
“Hey, hey, are you awake?”
It was definitely a man, his accent thick.
Cody tried to speak but all he could do was groan.
“He’s alive. I can’t believe it,” someone said from around him, “He looked dead when we found him.”
“His head is bleeding.”
“Hey, do you think it’s possible he’s from the base?”
“He’s definitely American so he must be.”
“Get a call out. Tell them we have an American. I’m sure they’ll make arrangements to get him.”
It was then Cody remembered.
He’d been only a few kilometres from the navy base when he’d finally not been able to push through any further. His head had been pounding and the world had begun to spin around him—although if it was from the lack of water or the head wonder, he wouldn’t have been able to tell you—and he must have collapsed in the sand before reaching it.
But, if they’d wanted to kill him, he’d already been dead and if they were talking about calling a nearby base.
“Um Qasr?” he slurred.
“Can’t believe he can even talk. We’re gonna get you medical help. We’ll call the base and see how soon they can get here. You’re lucky. Fifty kilometres in the direction you were facing would have gotten you killed and a few kilometres to the south and you would have found trouble,” one of the men holding onto Cody’s shoulder told him, “Not sure how long it will take them to get out here since there’s been a lockdown but we’ll call and see for you. First, we need to get you to the medical tent for triage.”
Triage was a strong word, as far as Cody was concerned. A little concussion and possibly a few broken bones were nothing to be triaging and still, he couldn’t find the energy to actually argue with them anyway, head swimming.
“You did good,” one of the men said, “Rest now. We will get you to safety.”
“Obi-Wan,” Cody mumbled, even as it started to get hard to think again, all the sounds around him dulling to a quiet rumble as he passed out once more.
Chapter 8
Notes:
Hello Friends!
Aight, so a couple of things. One, don't look too closely at my Yoda speak because that green gremlin is as weird as Star Wars's canon when it comes to consistency. Also, if you read everything a long time ago I had to change like 2 minor details for continuity's sake so if you notice, that's why. Also, also I WROTE CHAPTER 10 AND I'M DYING TO SHARE IT BUT I CAN'T AND IT'S KILLING ME. Grrrrr.Thank you to my frands, who helped me to pick a number and decide which chapter I've got to post.
That is all,
Marie
Chapter Text
Here be my tumblr (x), just as a heads up, once you follow me we are frands. No take backs. XD
“Mr. Fett…” the judge began to speak, and for a moment, Obi-Wan felt like he couldn’t breathe, the panic filling his chest even though his lawyer had reassured him time and time again that the law was on their side.
“Given your right up, have you. Upset, you seem. Broken any laws your son-in-law has not. Hrmmm. Asked that these children go to his husband after his death your son has. Clear his will is. No legal claim to take them from him you have. Hmm.”
Obi-Wan could have cried at the man’s words but he settled for throwing a grateful smile over to Windu, who still had a stern look on his face.
“I'm ruling in favour of Mr Kenobi-Fett. Yes, hrrrm,” Yoda said and when the elderly man banged his gavel Obi-Wan almost collapsed in relief.
When Obi-Wan walked out of the hearing and into the court’s halls, he’d scooped Echo and Jesse, kneeling down and beckoning Rex close. The little boy went to him right away, wrapping his arms tightly around Obi-Wan as he shoved his face into Obi-Wan’s neck, the tears in his eyes leaving damp marks on Obi-Wan’s skin.
“It’s alright,” Obi-Wan promised, “Everything is going to be okay. I told you that I wouldn’t be leaving you and I meant it. I wouldn’t have let you go anywhere. You were never going to go with him. Co-.”
He almost choked on the man’s name, his throat suddenly burning and he had to clear his throat.
“Cody wanted you with me,” he reminded them, “And he made it very clear that you were staying.”
He put a hair on Rex’s buzzed hair, rubbing the boy’s head as he closed his eyes, soaking in the win.
He hadn’t felt like he’d had very many wins, but at the very least, there was this.
It was the first time since he’d heard that Cody had passed away twenty-nine days ago that he’d felt like everything might eventually be okay.
Fifteen days after his husband had died, Obi-Wan felt like he’d died with him.
Fourteen days after that, Obi-Wan felt alive for the first time.
“I’m glad that you’ve finally allowed us to meet with you.”
Lieutenant Depa Billaba was a very no-nonsense kind of person, with dark hair slicked back into a bun and her uniform impeccable, but her eyes were kind as she looked at Obi-Wan, a pad and paper in her hand as she sat across from him in one of the loveseats.
“I’m sorry. I know that the last time you were here I was less than kind about things,” Obi-Wan said, stomach feeling heavy, “You were trying to help and I….I wasn’t ready for the help if I’m being honest. But now I could really some guidance.”
“Of course, Obi-Wan,” she said, looking a little sad, “We understand that things have been very difficult. No one would blame you for your initial reaction. Everyone responds to grief differently. But if you are ready, I’d be more than happy to help you with whatever it is you need.”
“I need help figuring out some forms so that we don’t lose medical coverage,” Obi-Wan admitted, pulling the stack of papers off the coffee table to present to her, “I’ve filled most of it out but some of it is things that I don’t know and I….I’ve been putting it off but I shouldn’t. I know how things can take a while and if I lose coverage for Echo then I don’t know what I’ll do. It probably seems silly but-”
“It’s not silly,” Depa interrupted gently, “That’s what I’m here for as a casualty assistance officer. Like I told you the first time we met, the job isn’t done just because the funeral is over. You’ve got three dependents to worry about and the adjustment isn’t going to happen overnight.”
“Thank you,” Obi-Wan said, shoulders slumping in relief, “With all the work that we have to do to get the house ready to sell and trying to take care of the kids alone, the paperwork has kind of fallen by the wayside. I just…I’m so tired of being on hold for hours.”
“Let’s get a plan set up,” Depa suggested, “We can make a list of what you need to do to switch what you need over and anything that you need help with—like the insurance coverage—we can do together. If we check off things as they are done I think it might help.”
“That would be perfect,” Obi-Wan agreed.
“I’d ask what that list ever did to you but for once I think your response is probably well deserved.”
Obi-Wan looked up from the list he was writing to where Anakin was sat, paging the bills and clipping death certificates to the forms to have things moved over into his name. He’d gotten what he could moved over, but it had been overwhelming to know that there were things that needed the original certificates, instead of the copies he’d been giving.
Now, he’d finally gotten the originals—at twenty dollars a damn copy of course—and could finally start closing things out. Except that the idea of closing out Cody’s bank accounts and investment portfolio and whatever else was there, had made Obi-Wan’s chest hurt and so Anakin had agreed to clip everything together so that they could just shove it into an envelope and send it off.
“Probably for the best,” Obi-Wan agreed, “If you have to write down a list that includes cleaning out your husband’s closet to put into storage and talking to a gun shop about how to transfer his weapons for sale you can make the same faces.”
Anakin didn’t look up but Obi-Wan could see the way that his face softened.
“What?” Obi-Wan asked finally.
“That’s the first time you’ve been so casual about what happened,” Anakin said, “I was- well we were starting to worry that…that you might not ever be able to accept it. Not that we really thought that but…sometimes it felt like that. So it’s nice to know that…that things will get better one day.”
“It’s good to know that eventually, I’ll get better,” Obi-Wan admitted, “For a while, it felt like there wasn’t any way to keep going. It’s not…I won’t lie and say that it’s all gone, because it’s not, but I finally…I finally feel like I can breathe. Just a little.”
Obi-Wan almost didn’t want to let go as he wrapped Ahsoka in a tight hug, stomach roiling, and so he held her there for a few extra minutes until there was another yell from one of the leads.
“I’m coming Wolffe,” Ahsoka yelled, pulling back gently from Obi-Wan and smiling gently at him, “It will be okay, Obi-Wan. It’s a follow-up from the last trip we took but we won’t be seeing any action, I promise.”
“The last time I stood here it felt like my life had ended,” Obi-Wan confessed, “Do you really have to leave again so soon? I thought you were supposed to be in counselling and learning to work with your new team, not shipping out.”
“I know and I would have agreed with you but…there’s something important that we need to do and…listen Obi-Wan,” she said and then she paused, taking a deep breath.
“Can you do me a favour?” she asked and Obi-Wan nodded.
“Don’t list the house until I’m back,” she said, “Please wait on it.”
“Wait on it?” Obi-Wan asked, “Wh- You’ve spent over a month telling me that I couldn’t hold on to it anymore. I think I’ve only got enough for another two or so payments until I can’t make the mortgage on it. Why the sudden change of heart?”
He looked back at Anakin, who looked just as surprised as him.
“What’s this about, Snips?” Anakin asked, “Are you really rethinking the house? Because we don’t-.”
“I’m not rethinking anything,” she cut him off, “I just think that both of us should be there to support him when it happens. I know that he’s doing better but I think this will be for the best.”
Obi-Wan’s heart sunk into his stomach as he watched them have a conversation completely with just their faces, not a word between them. It almost reminded him of Cody and him.
And it made him even more nervous.
“We won’t do anything until you finally come back,” Anakin finally said aloud, “Just hurry back, okay and be safe?”
“I always am,” Ahsoka said, stepping forward and wrapping her arms around Anakin even as Wolffe yelled for her again.
“I’m coming! I’m coming! God, it’s like you’ve never had to say goodbye to someone who just lost their husband and is worried about their friend leaving!” she yelled as she slung her duffle over her shoulder and jogged to catch up with him, “Oh wait….”
“You aren’t funny,” Wolffe said dryly and then turned to Obi-Wan, “I’ll take good care of her, Obi-Wan. Promise. Tango always protects their own.”
“Thank you,” Obi-Wan told him, waving a little as the two of them walked away.
It wasn’t reassuring as he watched them get ready to load up into the helicopter that his husband had left on and never come back.
It was the waiting game.
It was always the waiting game.
“It feels worse this time doesn’t it?” Anakin asked from where he was sitting across from Obi-Wan.
The kids had wanted desperately to have a sleepover and Obi-Wan had agreed. It would be good for all of them not to be alone. After all, Anakin might not have lost his sister, but Ahsoka had come back bruised enough—and with a wound from where she’d been grazed by a bullet—that he was sure that Anakin didn’t want to leave her any more than Obi-Wan himself had.
“Yes. It does,” Obi-Wan agreed, “We spent too much time dealing with it. We got used to them coming back, I suppose. Forgot for a moment that there was a chance that they wouldn’t.”
“They aren’t going into anything dangerous this time,” Anakin said, although he didn’t sound like he believed it himself, “She promised that they’d only be on established bases and it was more of a formality than anything.”
“Does that make you feel better?” Obi-Wan asked, looking up at the man.
Anakin’s jaw tightened, face contorting into something pained, “No.”
“Me either.”
“Daddy?”
Anakin and Obi-Wan turned to look at a sleepy-looking Leia, who was rubbing her eyes tiredly as she looked at them, hair in two loose braids. She blinked away the sleep a couple of times before walking forward to hold her arms out for Anakin to pick her up.
Anakin sat her on his lap, letting her lean her head against his chest as he rubbed her back gently.
“What’s wrong, sweetheart?” Anakin asked, “Couldn’t sleep?”
“I’m scared,” she admitted softly, “Aunt Ahsoka is back in the dangerous place, isn’t she?”
Obi-Wan’s throat was as dry as a desert as Anakin sighed.
“It’s complicated,” Anakin said softly, “But she’s not in the same place as last time. She’ll be safe this time.”
Leia bit her lip, fingers twisting in Anakin’s shirt, “I’m sure that’s what Uncle Obi said to Rex, Echo, and Jesse but then Uncle Cody didn’t come back.”
It felt like someone had gutted Obi-Wan, to hear her put it like that.
It was true, to a point.
Obi-Wan had always promised the boys that their older brother was in good hands, that he knew what he was doing and would be careful. He’d always told them that his main goal would be getting back to them and now…
Now he felt like a liar.
Except it wasn’t the kind of lie that could be remedied with an apology because no apology could possibly bring their brother back. Jesse and Echo didn’t even remember that Cody was their brother instead of their father. And none of them cared. All they’d cared about was that it was Cody who’d tucked them in at night and showed up at parent-teacher conferences and plays and holiday parties.
All they knew was Obi-Wan and Cody being there for them.
And now, there was only Obi-Wan.
He didn’t think like he’d ever really feel like he was enough, without Cody by his side to help.
“Obi?”
Obi-Wan looked over at Echo, who was struggling to walk towards him without his braces and stood up, walking forward to scoop the boy into his arms and press a kiss to his head.
“Hey Ek,” Obi-Wan said softly, “You too?”
“Can’t sleep,” the boy mumbled into Obi-Wan’s collarbone, “Don’t feel good.”
“Yeah that seems to be going around,” Obi-Wan said as he sat back down, rubbing the boy’s back and kissing his hair again.
“I’m scared,” the boy admitted softly, “Is Aunt Soka gonna come back?”
“I-I…” Obi-Wan trailed off, not knowing what to say.
He wanted to say yes. He wanted to reassure a boy who was too young to be dealing with these kinds of things that of course, his aunt would be returning to him. That there wasn’t any other place she’d rather be.
But those rose-tinted glasses had shattered and he’d never been good at lying.
“She’s going to do her best,” Anakin said firmly, “She’s not going into actual combat this time. She’s just helping to paint a picture for the army. It’s not as dangerous as the last time, I promise. She’ll be back if she’s got anything to say about it and you know how that works. What she wants, she gets.”
Echo sniffed, “Yeah that’s true. She does get what she wants.”
“She does,” Obi-Wan agreed, swallowing around the lump in his throat, “And as soon as we hear anything we’ll let you guys know. But right now it’s bedtime. And you both have school tomorrow so why don’t we get you tucked in again?”
“Do we have to go?” Leia whined, “Can’t we stay here with you?”
“You know you can’t,” Anakin said firmly, “It’s only for half the day and then you’ll be right back here bugging us, I promise.”
“Fine,” she said, “But you have to read another story. Please.”
“I can do that,” Anakin agreed, standing as he turned back to the kid’s rooms.
Chapter Text
This is my tumblr (x) for anyone interested.
Somewhere off in the distance was a beeping that had started to become grating.
It was the first thing that Cody thought when he came back to some sort of consciousness.
There was an ache in the back of his head and his body felt heavy. It was dark outside, though he could hear the faint sound of voices off in the distance. Or, at least he thought they were off in the distance.
The smell of antiseptic burned his nose and it shouldn’t surprise him that he was in the hospital, though he couldn’t remember what he’d done to get there. He was sure it was something that had been necessary at the time.
No unnecessary risks.
His next thought was of Obi-Wan, and how angry the man was going to be when Cody came back wrapped in bandages.
After that, it was hard to think, so when sleep came for him, Cody let it.
Cody wasn’t sure how much time had passed but one day, in the middle of the darkness that had felt neverending, it occurred to him that he might be in darkness because of something he’d done.
Which is when he tried to open his eyes.
They felt like they were glued shut when he tried, but he persisted, something in him telling him that it was important and he had to do it, no matter how impossible the task felt.
Finally, a cold, wet feeling along his shoulder finally made his eyes open and he looked blurrily at the stranger next to him for a few seconds before trying to jerk back.
But his limbs refused to cooperate and instead of a coordinated movement he mostly just flailed around, which in turn made his head ache even worse.
“It’s okay. You’re okay. You’re in the hospital,” the woman said and Cody blinked a few times to clear his vision so that he could see her scrubs.
Her accent was American and so he settled down, groaning at the throbbing in his skull.
“Hurts,” he slurred, trying to reach up a hand to touch his head, though they felt too heavy to move after his previous attempt.
“It probably does,” she agreed, “You’ve got a severe concussion, two broken ribs, a sprained ankle, and a lot of small cuts from the shrapnel and glass of the car explosion you were in. I’ll get the doctor though. Just give me a moment.”
Half of Cody was tempted to go back to sleep when she finally left his room, leaving the sponge and bucket she’d been holding and his nose wrinkled as he realized she’d been giving him a bath.
The other half thought if he’d been asleep for as long as it seemed, he probably should wait until they called Obi-Wan and let the man see him to go back to sleep. He’d only ever been injured enough to go to the hospital twice and both times, his husband had been beside himself—even though one of those times Cody had been injured in a drill they were running and not an actual combat scenario.
A man walked back in, dressed in ACU scrubs and Cody almost wanted to groan as he realized he wasn’t just in a hospital, but an army hospital, which would explain the overuse of cleaner and the somewhat shoddily construction of the whole thing.
“We’re glad to see you’re awake,” he said as he walked in, clipboard in hand, “Would you be willing to answer a few questions for us?”
“Master Chief Special Warfare Operator Cody Kenobi-Fett,” Cody answered hoarsely, “I don’t know the date but it must be a new year by now. I left for a mission on December Nineteenth and my car was blown up. A planted device, I think. We were being shot at but the car exploded in a way that a bullet couldn’t have caused. I was taken in by a family and hidden away for a few days before I started towards the base. Have I answered all your questions?”
“Well-,” the man started to say.
“Good,” Cody cut him off, “Now answer my questions. Did the rest of Alpha and Bravo make it out? Everyone else in the car was dead. Did they get away? Where am I? Where is my husband? He’s got to be freaking out by now.”
“Relax,” the man said seriously, “Calm down. Someone will be in to-.”
“Where are they?” Cody bit out, though his throat felt like it was on fire, “Where’s my husband?”
“Your husband isn’t here, Chief.”
Cody’s eyes widened as Commander Kryze walked in.
If Adonais was here, something had to have gone wrong. The only time they ever saw him was when they were being vetted or questioned.
“Sir,” Cody replied, wincing as he tried to turn his towards the man to salute and his whole torso lit up like it was on fire. Probably one of the broken ribs reminded him that moving wasn’t in his best interest.
“At ease, Master Chief,” the man said, “I just had to see it for myself. As far as we knew, you were dead. One of your tags was in the car where we found the rest of the remains.”
Cody swallowed, “I lost my shoe when I went through the windshield.”
“There’s a lot to talk about,” Commander Kryze said, “And a lot that the Navy has to explain. We’re hoping that you can fill in some of the gaps, though I know it might be difficult with everything that’s happened.”
“My husband,” Cody said, “Please first I need to see my husband. He needs to see me and know that I’m okay. He must have been beside himself thinking I wasn’t going to wake up.”
“Master Chief Krell is missing,” the Commander said, “And the ensigns in his car were found dead along with the driver. We are still trying to piece together what happened.”
“One of the drivers was missing,” Cody said, “We were supposed to be three to a car. I told Krell that we should call it off but he seemed to think that nothing was wrong. It wasn’t until we were too far into town that I really realized how much trouble we were in. They shot the driver and I went through the window. That’s how I’m still alive. The car exploded.”
“We got the Iraqi government to agree to lock down the town so we could go in,” Commander Kryze explained, “Since we were going after Palpatine at their behest. From what we could piece together, it looked like the bomb was under your seat. The tag that we found was mangled at best and as far as we knew, you were dead. As far as anyone knows, you’re dead.”
“De-,” Cody cut himself off, as his chest tightened.
Obi-Wan was probably more than beside himself.
Oh, God.
“With the blast radius and fact that there was no driver remains found, we assumed it had burned too hot to find anything,” he continued, “The two bodies in the back were so burnt that we needed the tags to identify them. I’m not sure dental records would have helped.”
“He died after catching a bullet in the neck. We had to push him out of the car so that we could steer. And in the back…Bo,” Cody said, realizing as he looked back to the man, “I’m so sorry, Sir. She was in the backseat.”
“I know,” the man confirmed, face neutral but Cody knew that he was anything but indifferent to what had happened, “Bo-Katan, Kal and Myles’s tags were found. All three of them were in the backseat at the time of the explosion.”
“What…what about Delta eight?” Cody asked, “Did- Did Ahsoka…?”
He couldn’t finish the sentence as the guilt started to sit heavy in his stomach.
He’d known that something was wrong.
He should have refused to go. He should have made the call to go back and then none of this would have happened and seven people wouldn’t have been-.
“Ensigns Tano, Bant, Secura, and Montross are okay,” the Commander said, “They were able to get out in time and they were exfiled.”
“You don’t know where Krell is? Is it possible it’s a ransom?” Cody asked seriously.
“Krell has been spotted in a few of the most recent videos sent out by Palpatine,” the Commander said, “He’s been officially listed as an enemy of the state. I’m afraid that’s all I can tell you. It’s an ongoing operation.”
“He’s a fucking rat,” Cody cursed, “I knew that we should have called that damn mission off. I fucking told him that.”
“Everything I’ve told you is classified, understand?” the man asked, looking at him seriously, “We’ve been waiting for you to wake up and assess the extent of your injuries before notifying anyone. The doctor will be able to speak on that more. I expect you’ll answer all of his questions.”
“Yes, sir,” Cody agreed, “Understood.”
“You look fucking awful!”
Cody let out a huff as Ahsoka’s chest hit his, her arms wrapping around him tight. He wrapped his arms around her, squeezing gently while the both of them pretended that her eyes weren’t wet with unshed tears.
“Thanks, Soka,” he grumbled, “Nice to see you too.”
She hit his shoulder and he hissed.
“Ow fuck. Why would you do that?” he asked as he rubbed his shoulder, “That fucking hurt, damn it. Don’t you know I’ve got broken ribs?”
“We thought you were dead! You’ve been gone for over a fucking month, Cody! Where the hell were you?”
“Stumbling around with a concussion, broken ribs, and shrapnel lodged in my body along the border of Kuwait and Iraq,” he said dryly, “As one does when they are launched five metres out of a car right before it explodes.”
“You really walked the whole way here?” she asked, “It was sixty kilometres from where we were. How did you even get out? I- You don’t- you’ve missed so much. Obi-Wan…he’s been…”
She trailed off, almost like she didn’t know what to say.
“I know,” he said, “And I’m gonna get back to him as soon as possible. They didn’t want to move me until I woke up but they said that I can get on the next flight outta here if I want and I…I think I want that.”
It wasn’t the first time that Cody had been anxious to leave. It was hard to enjoy being in a place where all you did was get shot at, run drills, and dump sand out of your boots. But it was the first time he’d said it and thought that he could live the rest of his life never seeing that place again.
It was the first time that he really thought that if Obi-Wan asked him to take a desk job and stop going out into the field, he might actually contemplate it for real.
He’d been away from his family for over a month.
His husband thought he was dead. His brothers thought he was dead.
They’d been dealing with grief that Cody couldn’t even begin to understand.
“I can’t blame you,” Ahsoka said, sitting on the plastic chair by his bedside as she crossed her arms, gently grasping her elbows as she looked him up and down, “I take it back. You look alive. That’s-that’s much better than what we thought.”
Cody gave her a small smile, “I’m okay Soka. My ribs hurt like hell, my head is pounding, and I feel like I could sleep for another week but I’m okay.”
“I- No one has said anything to Obi-Wan yet,” she said softly, “We- We don’t know what to say. Or how to say it. I don’t think- I don’t think that he’ll believe your alive if we try to tell him before you get there but I don’t know what will happen if we try video chat either.”
“You just want me to…show up at our front door? Are you really thinking that’s going to go any better?” Cody asked skeptically, “Just like, ‘hey Obi-Wan I know it’s been over a month but surprise! The Navy made a mistake and I’m fine?”
“Well I wouldn’t word it like that,” she said, “I- I honestly don’t know what to tell him. That’s…this is going to be hard no matter what.”
“I’m sure the Commander already has a plan,” Cody said, hoping that he was right, “We’ll just have to go with it and hope for the best. You don’t happen to know when the next ship out is, do you? I’m just waiting on papers. They’ve told me that I’m going to have some meetings over the next week or so but that I can at least go home now that I’m awake and they aren’t worried about scrambling my brain more.”
“I can ask,” Ahsoka offered, “I’m…I’m technically rolling with Tango though. They are looking into Palpatine and Krell. Apparently, they’ve figured out where they are. Don’t make that face at me. I’m not allowed to actually go. I’m too close to it. They’re just having us explain how the ambush went again. I think they are going to try for a second time.”
“Tell ‘em to be careful,” Cody said, “And tell ‘em I said to give ‘em Hell but my husband needs me at home and my brain is scrambled like an egg.”
“Yeah when he sees that new scar he’s going to flip,” she agreed.
Cody snorted, reaching a hand up to touch the new scar that still healing on his brow bone, curling around his eye. It was a miracle he could still see. He’d gotten lucky.
“Hopefully being able to see me will help,” Cody said, stomach tightening uncomfortably at the thought of his lover and the inevitable breakdown that was going to happen.
Not that he could blame the man.
But that didn’t make it any easier.
Chapter Text
This is my tumblr (x)
Nobody would tell him what was going on.
Which, wasn’t exactly new for the military but still, Obi-Wan’s stomach turned and he thought that he might throw up when they’d asked for him and the boys to come to their headquarters.
His first thought was that something had happened to Ahsoka but if that had happened they would have contacted Anakin first since he was next of kin.
Echo and Jesse were clinging to him as he walked through the doors and were shuffled into a nearby meeting area and even Rex was staying close, clearly sensing that something wasn’t quite right.
When they sat down and Commander Kryze walked in, Obi-Wan wondered if this was how he would find out what Cody had done to earn his medal. He couldn’t help but wonder why they’d decided it was okay to tell him. Had they decided that it wasn’t relevant to their mission after all and to tell Obi-Wan would be okay?
“Hello Mr Kenobi-Fett,” the Commander said, and it made his chest ache, more than he’d been expecting to hear Cody’s last name uttered.
“Hello Commander,” he greeted softly, “Just Obi-Wan is more than okay. It’s nice to see you again.”
It wasn’t, not really, but Obi-Wan knew it wasn’t the Commander’s fault in particular. It was the reminder that the only time Obi-Wan had really gotten to meet him had been at Cody’s funeral, which had possibly been the worst day of his life.
“I think just Adonais will do for this,” the man said, “I don’t know what they’ve told you about why we’ve asked you to come down but we have to apologize-.”
“Apologize? What is going on?” Obi-Wan asked, sitting up straighter, “This isn’t about the paperwork I’ve done with Sargent Depa? Because I don’t know what we’ll do with-.”
“It’s not that,” the Commander cut him off as gently as he could, “There’s been a turn of events that we couldn’t have predicted and there are some things that we need to talk with you about is all.”
“Okay,” Obi-Wan said cautiously, “What is- what does that mean, Commander? Because I’ll be honest, I’m not sure I can handle anything else on my plate. I- It’s taken a long time to get where I’m at and if you think my knowing is going to make things harder, I think I might just want to wait on knowing what happened. That’s why I’m here right? If it’s not about paperwork it’s about how Cody…”
He trailed off suddenly aware of the two children in his arms and the third who was clinging to him, fingers twisted into his belt loop.
“Maybe this would be a conversation that should be between the two of us,” he finally said, “Just until I know how to handle things.”
“I think that they’ll be fine,” the Commander said, though he sounded cautious and it made Obi-an’s stomach turn, “It’s something they should be here for as well, Obi-Wan. It’s- We will be talking a little bit about what happened but I promise nothing that would be construed as inappropriate.”
Obi-Wan sighed before taking a deep breath, hoping to ground himself against the panic that had welled up in his stomach, “Alright then. Please go ahead.”
“After the mission that teams Alpha and Delta were on, we went back to the scene with the help of the government of the country he was in, to piece together what happened. We found his dog tags at the scene in the car that he had been riding as a passenger in. The car was burned beyond recognition and the three people who were in the back of the car were identified with dog tags. The two people in the front weren’t identifiable at all. We assumed because of where the bomb was there wasn’t a body to be found.”
“Or rather,” Commander Kryze said, “We found a dog tag.”
Obi-Wan swallowed, throat feeling drier than the Sahara desert, “Have you officially found his other dog tag?”
“We have,” the Commander confirmed, “But not in the way that we thought we would.”
The noise that came out of Obi-Wan’s chest couldn’t have possibly been human.
Had Cody been alive after the blast? Had they had a chance to save him and not taken it, thinking he was already dead? Had his husband had a chance at getting out alive and no one had come for him?
He could hear the blood pounding in his ears and his breath started to come too quickly, stomach roiling at the thought.
Was this how he got his husband’s body back?
“Where’s the tag?” Obi-Wan asked voice soft, “Now that you’ve got both can I have one?”
“Yes, of course,” the Commander agreed and then they both looked up at the door as Depa walked in, face serious.
“With all due respect sir, this is why you let relations deal with this sort of thing, Commander Kryze,” she told the Commander, “Hello Obi-Wan. It’s good to see you again.”
“Hello,” Obi-Wan said, still feeling like he couldn’t get enough oxygen.
She sat down next to the other side of Obi-Wan, resting her elbows on the table as she laced her fingers together.
“We’ve got some good news,” she said, “We have found Cody’s second tag. There was a man recovered at a base that works with the United States government. It turns out that shortly before the explosion happened, Cody was thrown from the car.”
She put a hand over Obi-Wan’s, “He’s alive, Obi-Wan. He managed to take cover and hide out until it was safe for him to go to one of the bases. He was picked up with some severe injuries and so we wanted to ensure he was stable but he’s woken up.”
Obi-Wan breath caught in his throat and he felt dizzy, hand clenching under Depa’s as he searched her eyes.
It couldn’t be true. It had to be some sort of dream.
It had to be.
The sound of boots at the door had Obi-Wan turning, face going pale as he looked at the man in the threshold.
It was a ghost.
Obi-Wan couldn’t breathe.
Obi-Wan couldn’t breathe.
“Cody!”
Rex bolted from Obi-Wan’s side, all but jumping into the arms of the man standing there, his tiny arms wrapping around the man tightly as the man picked Rex up off the ground with ease, wrapping arms around the small boy.
“Dad!” Jesse and Echo scrambled off Obi-Wan’s lap to run towards the man in the doorway, who knelt down so that he could wrap arms around the three of them.
The man looked like Cody.
He had dark curls that were cut close to his scalp on the sides and his dark eyes were impossibly warm and his nose was the right shape, lips turned in that crooked smile that Obi-Wan’s husband had always thrown his way when he was doing something he knew he shouldn’t have been.
And when he looked up at Obi-Wan his eyes held the same loving look that his husband had always given him, like somehow he’d gotten the better end of the deal even though Obi-Wan thought that it couldn’t have possibly been true.
“Obi-Wan,” the man said, “Are you okay?”
Obi-Wan couldn’t move.
“Hey give me one second,” the man whispered to Rex, Jesse, and Echo, kissing the tops of their heads as he released his hold on them, cautiously stepping forward until he was in front of Obi-Wan and kneeling down, hands gently falling to hold onto Obi-Wan’s thighs lightly.
“Baby? Are you okay?” the man asked.
Obi-Wan couldn’t breathe.
“Obi-Wan,” the man said again.
It- it couldn’t be .
Obi-Wan had spent a whole month with the thought that his husband wouldn’t ever come home. That Cody wouldn’t ever come back to him. He’d finally accepted it. What kind of cruel joke was his mind playing on him now, dangling Cody in front of him looking just as perfect as he always had with only a scar on his brow bone like he’d not really been hurt at all?
His car had caught on fire.
He was dead .
Who was kneeling in front of Obi-Wan, taking Obi-Wan’s hand in his and kissing his palm and looking every bit the husband that Obi-Wan had been forced to say goodbye to?
“Obi-Wan,” the man said again, force a little firmer, “Please. Say something.”
Obi-Wan didn’t know if he had any words. He didn’t know if he could get words passed the lump in his throat, didn’t know if he would ever be able to speak again.
He reached out a shaky hand, pressing a finger to the scar on the man’s eyebrow, feeling the rough ridges of a newly healed scar and taking in the redness along the broken skin.
“It was healing until they had to go in and take out some shrapnel,” the man explained, “They were afraid it would migrate towards my eye and they didn’t want to take the chance.”
He let his trembling hand follow the scar down, running a finger down the man’s cheek and along his neck until it landed on his shoulder. He felt the over the old, raised scar, suddenly remembering the night that he and Cody had been together and he’d told him about how he’d gotten it.
“He was drunk,” Cody explained, a faraway look in his eyes as he curled back against Obi-Wan’s chest, letting the man run fingers over the scar on his left shoulder, “And he was always a mean drunk. He’d thrown a bottle and decided that it wasn’t enough that it had broken so he picked it back up and threw it at me again. The glass got lodged in my shoulder. A few days later CPS came and removed me. Sometimes…sometimes I don't tell a story because it feels like…like giving up a piece of me. But if we- I want to…give a piece of me to you.”
It had been the first of Cody’s scars that Obi-Wan had ever seen and somehow he’d heard all the stories about every single other now. It meant more than just a simple story and Obi-Wan knew what Cody was really saying, even though the man had never been able to utter the words in the eight months they’d been together.
“Me too,” Obi-Wan said, nuzzling his face into Cody’s neck, “Just in case you were wondering.”
“I’m glad,” Cody replied, voice sounding a little hoarse though Obi-Wan didn’t acknowledge it, “Do you still want to- you still wanna go to grab breakfast and come with me to ROTC?”
“Of course,” Obi-Wan agreed, keeping his voice light, “Wouldn’t miss a free breakfast for anything.”
Cody’s hand found his and the man squeezed, as if to let Obi-Wan know that he knew it was a bullshit excuse but Obi-Wan just smiled against Cody’s shoulder.
“Obi-Wan.”
Obi-Wan focused back on the man in front of him, blinking a few times to clear out his vision as it started to blur.
The man reached a hand up to Obi-Wan’s face wiping a tear that Obi-Wan hadn’t realized had fallen.
The man. The man. Themanthemanthemanthemanthemanthe-.
“Cody.” Obi-Wan’s voice broke as he said the word like it didn’t believe what he was seeing either.
“Yeah, baby it’s me,” Cody promised and a sob escaped Obi-Wan’s mouth as he flung himself into Cody’s arms, wrapping his arms around the man’s neck as he started to cry.
It felt like someone had cracked his chest open as he felt Cody, warm and strong and real against him, his cracked lips finding Obi-Wan’s temple as he placed a soft kiss there, rubbing at Obi-Wan’s back softly.
Obi-Wan could feel something digging into his side and he pulled back, tears still falling down his face to see Echo and Jesse trying to fit themselves in the space, and he let out a laugh just the wrong side of hysterical, pulling back further to let them wedge themselves in between Obi-Wan and Cody, Cody’s hand never leaving his back as smiled down at the two of them.
“Rex.” Obi-Wan’s voice wobbled as he looked up at the boy, who was standing there shifting from foot to foot, “Come here, darling.”
Rex all but ran to shove himself in between the two of them, tears falling down his face the second he was safely nestled between the two of them.
“I know, I know,” Cody said, voice soft and pained, “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry .”
“You fucking bastard,” Obi-Wan cursed at him before he could stop himself, “You said you would be careful. You said you’d be ba-.”
He broke before he could get the word out, stopping to take a breath before continuing, “You’re back. You’re back and that’s all I care about.”
“I’m back,” Cody agreed, “And I love you. All of you.”
He kissed each of the boy’s heads before leaning forward to press his lips against Obi-Wan’s in a quick kiss.
Obi-Wan’s hand shot out to catch the back of the man’s head and pull him back in for a real kiss in a clash of tongue and teeth and desperation that Obi-Wan had locked away in the hopes of feeling like he might be able to be whole again even without the warmth that had always sat in his chest where Cody had been.
It hadn’t worked.
“I want to go home,” Echo mumbled into Cody’s shirt, “Please, dad. I wanna go home.”
“We will,” Cody promised, looking up into Obi-Wan’s eyes, “We’ll all go home.”
Chapter 11
Notes:
So here this is. The second to last chapter. Hopefully the last chapter will be up soon.
Chapter Text
Here be my tumblr (x).
Cody walked into their house with the caution of someone who thought they might not be an invited guest, though Obi-Wan thought that it probably had more to do with how different everything looked.
He’d put about half of their stuff into storage, just like the real estate agent had suggested, though at the time it had felt like he’d felt a little like his chest would cave in from the grief that had taken the spot that his husband had once been.
“I haven’t thrown anything away,” Obi-Wan offered, hand coming down to play with the ring on his finger, only to freeze halfway.
He’d been trying to stop that and it took him another minute to realize that he wouldn’t have to stop that, not with Cody back.
Not with the man standing in his living room, eyes appraising as he looked around the space, back just as ramrod straight as it had always been, despite it being home and not Cody’s barracks.
Since Cody had joined the army, it had seemed like home had become less and less a place to relax and the tense line of his husband’s shoulders reminded Obi-Wan why they’d had countless fights between them.
“I can’t leave.”
Cody’s voice was steady but firm, his refusal to yell making something burn even angrier in Obi-Wan’s chest despite the fact that there was a time when he would have seen it as a green flag.
Now, it felt like resignation, like Cody had given up his ability to feel things when he’d signed those stupid fucking papers when they’d been stupid kids desperate to move up in the world.
“You can!” Obi-Wan snapped, the irritation bubbling over into his voice, “You- you can! I know you can! You can’t keep doing this Cody! One day you are going to end up dead! You almost ended up dead!”
“It wasn’t that serious,” Cody said calmly, though his gaze pinned Obi-Wan to his spot, never moving to the cast his arm was in or the splint keeping his shoulder in place.
“Your shoulder is broken! Why don’t you seem to care?” Obi-Wan pleaded, “Is this about the money, Cody? Because we can figure something out, this doesn’t have to-.”
“You work as a professor part-time,” Cody cut him off, voice almost the wrong side of sharp, “And you need to be home with the kids part-time, Obi-Wan. We can’t both afford to be out of work.”
“You could get another job,” Obi-Wan insisted, “We would be alright for at least a month or two, Cody. Please, please would you just think about it?”
Cody sighed, the sound more defeated than Obi-Wan ever wanted to hear from his husband.
“I’ll think about it,” Cody said.
It was a lie.
One that they both knew too well and Obi-Wan wished that he could go back to the stupid kid who’d told Cody that they’d follow him anywhere and shake sense into him.
He wished he could show him what his future would look like.
“Wh-where is everything then?” Cody asked, eyes raking over the space.
Cody was leaning more heavily to one side, despite his insistence that he didn’t need any help and one of his hands reached out to press against the kitchen island, as if to keep him upright.
Obi-Wan strode forward, even as Cody’s eyes flickered over him, ducking under one of Cody’s arms and wrapping an arm around Cody’s waist before the man even had time to protest.
“Obi-.”
“I thought that you were dead. Let me help with this,” Obi-Wan cut him off, speaking around the lump in his throat, surprised to find that his eyes burned even though he’d been sure he didn’t have any tears left.
Something in Cody’s face softened in a way that made Obi-Wan’s heart squeeze painfully in his chest.
“I think that I might like to take that nap that you were talking about,” Cody’s voice was soft, like he knew that Obi-Wan was only a second from crawling out of his own skin.
“I- I’d like that,” Obi-Wan agreed.
“Dad!”
Echo and Jesse smacked into the back of Cody’s calves, nearly toppling the man as they wrapped themselves around his legs, peering up at the both of them with wide, pleading eyes.
“I thought you were both too old for naps,” Cody said, as if they’d have let the two of them run around without supervision.
“Not this time!” Echo protested, “Nap time with you and Obi! Pleaseeeee?”
Cody just huffed out a small huff of laughter, face softening as he looked at the both of them, one hand going to ruffle Echo’s hair, “Of course. Why don’t you get Rex too? See if he wants to join us?”
Jesse got a determined look on his face, giving them both a serious nod as he turned and started to run back towards where Obi-Wan was sure that Rex would be.
“If everyone is set on having five people in this bed then we are going to need to get a bigger bed.”
Obi-Wan made a soft noise of agreement from where he was pressed tightly against Cody’s side, face shoved into the man’s neck and leg slung over Cody’s waist, not willing to let go of the man yet, despite knowing that they all had to get up.
Warm lips met Obi-Wan’s forehead and he hummed softly, tempted to bury himself even further into Cody’s side, even though he knew it was the exact opposite of what he was supposed to be doing.
“Don’t the three of you have school soon?” Cody asked, lifting his head and eyeing the three children on the bed.
Rex sat up, frowning, “I don’t want to go to school. I want to stay here with you. Why can’t we have more time?”
“It’s been a week,” Cody reminded him gently, “And I need to go and deal with some things today as well. It’s not as if I’ll be home all day. Obi is going to work and you are going to school and then at the end of the day we’ll be together again, alright?”
Rex frowned, laying back down to shove himself against Cody, fingers twisting into Cody’s sleep shirt and he pressed himself against the line of Cody’s side.
“I dun wanna,” he muttered, “Please can I stay with you?”
“I’ll drop you off myself,” Cody promised, shifting so that he was bracing himself on his elbow as he looked at the three kids in their bed, “You only have a half day today anyway since it’s Valentine’s Day. You don’t want to miss the party today, do you?”
Rex shuffled even closer, though Cody wasn’t really sure how it was even possible, “I don’t want to go to the party anymore. I want to stay with you.”
Obi-Wan finally lifted his head from Cody’s chest, leaning on his elbow as he sighed softly, “I promised that I’d be there, remember? I’m going to be there for the whole party. We’re bringing the Valentine’s Day cards that you made especially for your class. Don’t you want to give them out?”
“I can hand them out ‘nother day,” Rex mumbled against Cody’s collarbone, “I don’t want to leave.”
“I’ve got some things that I need to do this morning,” Cody repeated softly, “But what if I talk to your teacher? Maybe I can come in and volunteer with Obi so that I can be at your party today. Would that feel better for you?”
“And if she says no?”
Rex’s voice was small, smaller than it had been since Cody had first gotten custody of him and he’d refused to speak to anyone and it made something ache in his chest, to know that his brother had been reduced back to that kid who hadn’t thought his voice was worth anything.
It wasn’t a lesson that his brother should know anything about, not one that anyone should really know. It was the lesson of someone who was afraid to use their voice in case they broke the tentative peace that had been formed.
Cody knew the voice well.
It had been his once.
“Then I’ll take you out of class for the rest of the day and we can go celebrate ourselves,” Cody promised firmly, “I’ll take you and the twins to the park early and then we’ll go get ice cream and to visit…visit mom, if you want.”
Cody swallowed thickly, wondering how it was possible that he hadn’t choked on the word, when there’d been a time that he didn’t think that he’d ever be able to say it again.
Obi-Wan’s hand found his, squeezing gently, Obi-Wan’s lips finding Cody’s shoulder to kiss the scar softly.
“To give her flowers?” Rex asked, shy and hopeful as he looked up at Cody through dark lashes and Cody nodded.
“To give her flowers,” he promised, “Just like last year.”
“Okay,” Rex said, straightening up like he was preparing for war and it sent a jolt of anxiety through Cody for the first time.
He wasn’t, Cody knew. Rex didn’t even quite have a grasp on what war was . He only understood that Cody left to fight people who did bad things to help keep their country safe. He didn’t understand how Cody did it. He didn’t understand the bad parts of it, at least not yet.
He wasn’t preparing for war.
He was imitating Cody.
But Cody had always tried so hard to keep his work away from his family that it made something ache in his chest to see so casually how he’d failed at it.
Obi-Wan squeezed his hand tighter.
“How about you go get ready and I’ll start on breakfast?” Cody suggested, something heavy sitting in his stomach as Rex nodded, looking determined as he started to climb out of bed.
“I’m going to wear my red T-rex shirt for Valentine’s Day!” Rex declared as his feet hit the carpet of his and Obi-Wan’s bedroom floor, “I’ll be ready in five minutes! Can we have the special Valentine’s Day pancakes that Obi makes?”
“I’ll do my best!” Cody called as Rex disappeared around the corner, sighing softly as Echo started to crawl towards him, situating himself in Cody’s lap and laying against his collarbone, “You ready to get up?”
“No,” Echo said simply, shoving himself further into Cody’s arms, “But want pancakes.”
“Well then, I guess we’ll have to do something about that,” Obi-Wan said softly and Echo nodded softly as Jesse started to crawl closer to them, plopping into Obi-Wan’s lap.
“Can we even make the pancakes without the beet juice you use?” Cody asked softly and Obi-Wan nodded.
“I’ve got some food dye,” he said and Cody lifted a brow.
“Red food dye is proven as bad for children and shouldn’t be used often,” Obi-Wan said firmly, “That doesn’t mean we can’t cheat in a pinch. One time isn’t going to kill them. I just don’t like to use them in homemade food.”
Cody just rolled his eyes, though he couldn’t help the small smile on his face, “Whatever you say. I suppose the food dye will just have to do.”
“Shut up. You’re lucky I love you,” Obi-Wan muttered, kissing his shoulder once more before groaning and sweeping Jesse into his arms.
Jesse squealed, giggling loudly as Obi-Wan rocked him back and forth, eyes shining with amusement as he tucked the boy back against his chest.
“How does juice sound?” Obi-Wan asked, looking at Echo as the boy straightened up, looking infinitely more awake.
“Grape juice?” he asked hopefully and Obi-Wan sighed, nodding.
“I suppose we could do that,” he agreed, laughing as Echo started to squirm in Cody’s grip.
“I guess that means it’s time for breakfast,” Cody laughed, scooping up Echo and pressing the boy against his chest, “We’ll have to get your braces and then we can go down and we’ll help Obi make breakfast, okay?”
Echo nodded, relaxing against Cody once more and Cody kissed the top of his head, shaking away all the rest of his thoughts to deal with later.
“I’m not sure I understand, sir,” Cody said seriously, looking up at Kryze as he folded his hands on top of the table.
“Well according to the doctors you won’t be back in the field for at least a year,” Kryze said seriously, “And that’s not including the required psych eval, Fett. I’d like to think that you’ll pass it if you have to but I’d also understand if you didn’t.”
“Wh-what?” Cody asked, “What’s that supposed to mean? I know how to shorten my healing time, sir. I’ll be back in the field in eight months. I’ll fly through physical therapy, you know that.”
“I don’t doubt that, Master Chief. I’m asking if that’s what you really want,” Kryze said firmly, “What you went through wasn’t a normal occurrence. You were recorded KIA. Maybe I’m not asking if you’re up to it.”
Cody swallowed thickly, wetting his bottom lip, “Obi-Wan has always supported my career.”
“I know,” Kryze agreed, “I talked to your old squad leader, Alpha. Said that Obi-Wan was always behind you one hundred per cent. Didn’t have much nice to say about your father but from what I gathered, Obi-Wan is all the family that you have, besides those three young brothers of yours.”
“If you’ve got something to say then say it,” Cody snapped back and then immediately winced at the tone of his voice.
“I’m sure that you know but my daughter, Bo-Katan Kryze, was in the same car that you were when that bomb went off,” he said, “My wife supported every single move we had to make, every change of career she had to take, every single day she had to raise our children alone because I’d been called away for work. Now both my wife and my youngest daughter won’t look at me.”
“I’m-I’m sorry, sir,” Cody murmured, “I can’t imagine.”
“It was the reality that your husband lived for six weeks while you were gone,” Kryze said seriously, “I’m asking you if you want to come back because if not, I’ll start the paperwork and you can talk to the doctors. We can get you medically discharged so that you can still get the benefits that you deserve, Master Chief, but if you go back, you’re stuck here for another decade. I just want you to think if that’s the best thing for you and your family before you make the decision. You’ve got time before you need to decide but I just wanted to put it on your radar.”
“I- Thank you, sir,” Cody said, instead of asking any of the dozen questions that were on his mind, “I’ll talk to my husband and I’ll get back to you as soon as possible.”
“Good,” Kryze said, nodding, “Now tell me what they said about your injuries. How long are the expecting before you can start physical therapy?”
“What?”
Cody turned his head to look at Obi-Wan, one hand above his head as he stretched out and Obi-Wan almost didn’t know what to say. Cody almost looked like a dream—something that would disappear if Obi-Wan stared at him too long—honeyed skin gleaming in the sunlight that was filtering from their bedroom window, eyes warm and soft as he looked at Obi-Wan, a small smile on his face, the only proof that he wasn’t a dream the scar wrapped around his eye, still red and rough as if to remind Obi-Wan how hard it had been for Cody to come back to him.
But he’d come back to him and that was all that mattered.
“I didn’t think that we’d ever be alone in bed again,” Obi-Wan murmured, with a soft smile of his own as he reached a hand across the bed to drag a hand down Cody’s arm, shuffling closer and tilting his head down so he could press their lips together.
“Enjoy it while you can,” Cody whispered between their lips, “Because the second school and preschool let out we’ll have three kids glued to our calves again.”
“You like them close by,” Obi-Wan muttered, “I know you do.”
Cody kissed him again, his hand finding Obi-Wan’s face so that he could run fingers along his jaw, humming happily as he pulled back.
“I do,” he agreed, “So much so that I ordered a new bed. A king so that maybe we’ll stop ending up with an elbow in the back every morning.”
“You’re dreaming if you think that will help,” Obi-Wan murmured back, hands cupping Cody’s face as he pressed their lips together again, kissing him softly over and over as he wrapped a leg around Cody’s waist, plastering himself against the man as he deepened the last kiss.
Obi-Wan hummed happily as Cody’s lips found his temple and began to follow along his jaw, kissing down his throat as his hands found Obi-Wan’s hips to hold onto.
It was surreal, to have the familiar hands on his hips and the warm, chapped lips of his husband on his neck and the firm press of Cody’s chest pushed against his chest and Obi-Wan felt like he was high, lightheaded and warm and loved in his husband’s arms and when Cody pulled back to look at him with dark eyes he groaned softly, his lips finding the hollow of Cody’s throat, making the man’s breath hitch even as he spoke.
“Obi we don’t have time right now,” Cody muttered, “As much as I’d love to right now. We have to start getting boxes out of storage so that I have more clothes to wear than the three ratty tees you refused to get rid of.”
“I like those ratty tees,” Obi-Wan muttered right back, “They were soft and they smelled like you.”
“Yeah well maybe you should have decided a pair of my cargo pants were comfy,” Cody teased, “Because I have three shirts and a single pair of standard issue army pants that aren’t too comfortable to hang around the house in.”
“I guess we can get a few boxes of clothes,” Obi-Wan sighed, “But I’m not ready to get out of bed yet. Can we stay for just a few more minutes?”
“Didn’t you just yell at our children for this very thing?” Cody asked even as he pulled Obi-Wan closer, pressing a kiss to his head, “How about ten minutes?”
“Fifteen,” Obi-Wan responded, “And I’ll give you another kiss.”
“Well you drive a hard bargain, Mr Kenobi-Fett,” Cody said with a small huff of laughter, “But I’ll take it. One kiss for an extra five minutes in bed.”
Obi-Wan tilted his head up to press their lips together, letting their mouths move against each other’s in a lazy, slow kiss before settling back against Cody’s collarbone, nuzzling in softly and he relaxed back against the sheets.
“I…What?”
Obi-Wan looked up at the confused look on Cody’s face, raising a brow in question as his husband looked up at him, looking almost like a deer in headlights.
“And-and you’re sure? Why…why wasn’t I…or- or my husband? Why wouldn’t you have informed my husband about this?”
There was a muffled voice on the other side and Cody put a hand up as Obi-Wan straightened up, facial expression moving to let Obi-Wan know that he’d tell him in a second.
“It doesn’t matter what he wanted, he lost custody!” Cody snapped, stressing the words, “She should have gone to family!”
“Cody?” Obi-Wan asked softly, putting a hand on Cody’s arm as Cody started to clench his teeth, the line of his jaw tight as he listen to whatever the person on the other line was saying.
Cody pulled the phone away from his face for a minute before muttering, “Hold on a minute.”
There was a pause while he listened to what the person had to say.
“Well tell them that I’m undead,” Cody said tightly, “And that I want custody of my damn sister.”
Obi-Wan sucked in a sharp breath, eyes widening as he realized what Cody was saying.
Obi-Wan listened as Cody explained things to the lady, fingers feeling cold as it set in what the man met.
Somehow some poor woman had decided that Jango Fett was a good idea again and if what Cody was saying was true, he’d gotten another woman pregnant.
He swallowed, tapping his fingers nervously on the counter as he waited for his husband to finish talking, though, by the time Cody hung up, he still wasn’t sure that he had the words to say.
“She died in childbirth,” Cody said, answering the question that Obi-Wan didn’t know how to ask, “She’s only a month old or so. The fucking bastard probably had already knocked her up when he was trying to get custody of his other kids back. Apparently, there would have been some money in it.”
Obi-Wan’s head shot up, “Wh-what?”
“The woman. Her name was Nala Se. She came from old money if the place is to be believed. Left everything to her daughter when she died. Every single cent of the hundreds of millions of dollars.”
“Jesus fucking Christ,” Obi-Wan cursed, “Are you serious? And there’s no one to take care of her?”
Cody shook his head, “Her other aunt refuses to accept that she’s even part of the family. The money has been put aside into a trust for her that she won’t be able to access until she’s eighteen. In the meantime, a request will have to be put into the trust to take anything out of it and apparently, the man who is in charge of it is quite the hard ass. Told Jango if he doesn’t have her he can fuck off.”
“Good man,” Obi-Wan said, “We could have done with him not too long ago.”
“His name is Hunter and he’s been looking for any sort of family that she might be able to stay with,” Cody explained, “Which is how the agency gave him my name. But as far as anyone was concerned…”
“You were dead,” Obi-Wan finished, “So you couldn’t help.”
“They should have given your name,” Cody said firmly, “You’ve been as much a parent to them as I have and you would have taken her in. I know you would have. They were just…just being fucking stupid bigots. They said you weren’t family .”
He spit out the word angrily like it had offended him and Obi-Wan sighed softly, stepping forward to gather his husband in his arms, humming softly as he pressed his forehead against Cody’s.
“We’ll talk to him now,” Obi-Wan promised, “Let him know that you are back and that we are more than willing to take her if he wants her to be with her family. Here she can be with her four brothers. I’d say that’s better than anything the state would be able to come up with.”
“ Five,” Cody said, voice serious, “Five brothers. We are married, Obi-Wan. You are as much family to us as we are to you. Without you, I wouldn’t have been able to take my brothers in, not with my career. You put your career on hold to take care of them. That means something. And I’d hope you knew that but now but maybe it needs saying…every once in a while.”
“I-I know that,” Obi-Wan promised, voice soft, “You and the boys have always been home, Cody. You don’t have to worry about that.”
“You’re our home too,” Cody insisted, “You are as much a home to us as we are to you. You’re important, Obi-Wan. You managed to take care of my brothers all alone without me, when you thought that I wasn’t coming back. You did well.”
Obi-Wan could feel the stinging in the back of his eyes and he squeezed them shut so that he wouldn’t shed any tears, pulling himself tighter to Cody and then pressing their lips together.
“I love you,” Obi-Wan whispered, “I’m so glad that you are home. I- I wasn’t doing well without you. If- if it hadn’t been for Ahsoka and Anakin I don’t think I could have done it.”
“I’m glad that you had someone to help,” Cody murmured, “And I’m glad that you made it through that. But you don’t have to worry. I’m here now and I’m not going anywhere anytime soon. I promise.”
“I know, darling,” Obi-Wan promised, “I know. I love you.”
“I love you too,” Cody murmured, “Now…let me find this Hunter’s number. We’ll give him a call and see if we might be able to help.”
Chapter Text
This is my Tumblr (x) if you are interested.
“You’ll have to excuse my surprise,” Hunter murmured, “I was told that she didn’t have any family of age to take care of her except for a dead brother by the name of…”
He looked down at the paper, and Cody cleared his throat.
“Cody Kenobi-Fett,” he said, and Hunter looked up at his with a raised brow, “As it turns out, I’m not as dead as everyone would have to believe, though I guess it never hurts to set a plot aside for when the day comes.”
“You aren’t funny,” Obi-Wan said sharply, fingers clenching as he caught sight of the band glittering in the sun.
Cody’s hand found his, rubbing the back of Obi-Wan’s knuckles as he looked at him apologetically and then turned to Hunter.
“Long story short, I was a prisoner of war,” he said, “But the army found my dog tags and assumed I died in an explosion that killed some members of my team. You can imagine everyone’s surprise when I popped back up.”
“Kenobi-Fett,” the man murmured, looking over at Obi-Wan, “You’re married.”
Cody nodded, “My husband, Obi-Wan Kenobi-Fett. We’ve been married for a while now, and we’ve got custody of my three brothers. If I’d known that Jango was sniffing around skirts again, I would have warned them it was a bad idea.”
“I wasn’t aware that you were married or that you had a living spouse to reach out to,” Hunter said, his mouth a thin line, “It would have been good to know.”
“The federal government might recognize our marriage, but the state of Virginia very much does not,” Cody said flatly, “The woman you talked to from CPS failed to mention to you that I had a spouse because she said that he wasn’t technically related to her charge.”
“So neither of you has any objections to having her with you,” he said, “I assume that your husband would be the primary caretaker since it says here that you are special ops for the Navy.”
“Actually, I’ll be retiring,” Cody murmured, and Obi-Wan jerked, looking over at Cody with wide eyes.
“Wh-What?” he demanded.
“With my full pension and retirement plus a small disability pay,” Cody continued, “Kryze gave me some options when I talked to him. I picked what I thought was best for our family. Either way, I won’t be fit to work much of anywhere for at least a year with my physical injuries.”
“Do your physical injuries prevent you from caring for a newborn?” Hunter asked.
“We aren’t done with this conversation,” Obi-Wan warned Cody before he turned to Hunter, “We are looking to move, and one of our friends, Anakin Skywalker—the brother of one of Cody’s coworkers—works from home and would be around if there were something that Cody wouldn’t be able to do.”
“Move? From base housing, I presume,” Hunter said, scratching some more notes onto his pad.
“It’s a large house that’s got plenty of bedrooms for everyone out in the country,” Obi-Wan explained, “It’s got a lot of space—a full coop and a small plot for farming. We thought that it might be a good change of pace.”
“And you’re under contract on it?” Hunter asked.
“Closing in three weeks,” Cody agreed, “Omega will be able to have her own room and plenty of kids to be around. My three brothers plus the two Anakin has. She’ll be somewhere safe and loved. I know that it’s not exactly traditional.”
“I gave up traditional for Omega a long time ago,” Hunter confided, “She doesn’t need conventional. She needs somewhere where people will take care of her, and she’ll have someone who understands what she’s been through when she gets older.”
“So, does that mean we can move forward with a home interview?” Obi-Wan asked, squeezing Cody’s hand tightly.
“If possible, I’d like to see the place that Omega is going to be living,” he agreed, “Since we know that you’ll be moving soon enough.”
“Of course,” Cody agreed, clearing his throat a little, “Let me talk to our agent.”
“Get over here.”
Cody grimaced as he followed Obi-Wan down the hall towards their bedroom, steeling himself for the lecture he was sure he would receive—only to freeze as Obi-Wan started to yank off his shirt.
“Wh-what?” Cody asked, even as he lifted his arms to help Obi-Wan, his brain trying to catch up with what was happening.
“We’ve got forty-five minutes before the bus comes, so you’d better hurry the fuck up,” Obi-Wan said, pulling his shirt off and sitting back on the bed, “Are you coming or not?”
Cody blinked at Obi-Wan a few times before his brain caught up with the man’s words. Then he shoved his pants down, hopping and kicking them off his ankles before crawling onto the bed as Obi-Wan laid back.
“What’s this?” Cody asked, even as he crawled up Obi-Wan’s body, breathless as he looked at the dark, interested look in Obi-Wan’s eyes.
Obi-Wan cupped Cody’s face.
“You’re staying?” Obi-Wan asked, his voice quiet, “You promise?”
“I’ve already started the process,” Cody agreed, “It’s not an overnight thing, but it’s going to happen. Normally, it takes about a year to retire fully, but…I won’t be in action for any point due to the injury to my eye.”
“Do you remember when you used to come home after deploying? I would tell you that you needed to make it home before the kids got home from daycare or school, and you’d always somehow make it right in time. The only time you were ever on time.”
“I do,” Cody agreed, “You can’t exactly blame me though-”
Cody’s fingers brushed down Obi-Wan’s side.
“-you were so beautiful, and seeing you always made my blood boil. Besides, I never remember you complaining about me being on time.”
“Because seeing your husband come home safe after months of hearing nothing gets the blood pumping,” Obi-Wan murmured, “And if I hadn’t been trying to keep from falling into a pit of despair for months, then seeing my husband come home after thinking that he was dead would have probably done the same thing.”
“Yeah?” Cody asked, “And now?”
“And now I know I won’t ever have to wait again, and I want you on top of me, Cody. I think we’ve waited long enough.”
“Fuck. Yeah, yes, of course,” Cody agreed, leaning down to catch Obi-Wan’s lips with his.
Obi-Wan’s arms wrapped around Cody’s neck, pulling him down as he wrapped a leg around Cody’s waist, opening his mouth so that Cody could slip his tongue in, letting him turn the kiss desperate and dirty.
Cody pulled back, pressing his forehead against Obi-Wan’s as he unbuttoned Obi-Wan’s pants, quickly pulling them off him and sitting back to look at his husband.
Obi-Wan’s eyes were half-lidded, and he was flushed down his chest, one knee bent and the other spread so that Cody could see Obi-Wan’s half-hard cock nestled in a patch of copper hair and heat twisted in his gut at the sigh that Obi-Wan made.
Cody’s fingers slipped beneath his boxer briefs and wrapped around his cock as he stroked himself, hardly able to believe how beautiful the man looked.
“Are you going to just look at me, or are you going to come down here?” Obi-Wan asked.
“Fuck,” Cody cursed, yanking his boxers down as he crawled back on top of Obi-Wan, softly laughing as Obi-Wan yanked him down, pressing their lips together.
“I’ve missed this,” Obi-Wan whispered against Cody’s lips.
“I’ve missed this too,” Cody murmured, his voice thick, “I wasn’t sure if we’d get back here again. It seemed like this was the last thing you’d want when I got back.”
“Every time I looked at you, all I could think about was you deploying again,” Obi-Wan admitted softly, cheeks flushing, “About how next time might be the last time I ever saw you again, but for real. I just got you back.”
“I never left, Obi-Wan,” Cody promised softly, “And I decided there wouldn’t be a next time. Not when I’ve got so much to lose.”
“I love you,” Obi-Wan said, his fingers tightening around Cody’s neck.
“I love you too,” Cody breathed.
“I want you,” Obi-Wan pleaded, “I want to feel that you’re real.”
“I’m real,” Cody promised, “And I’m right here, Obi.”
Cody pressed their lips together again, letting one hand trail up and down Obi-Wan’s stomach as the man moaned into the kiss.
Cody trailed kisses down Obi-Wan’s neck as he wrapped a hand around Obi-Wan’s cock, stroking it slowly as Obi-Wan moaned, tilting his hips into Cody’s grip.
“I’ve got you,” Cody murmured, thumbing at Obi-Wan’s tip before pressing their lips back together.
Obi-Wan’s hand wrapped around his cock, and Cody moaned into Obi-Wan’s mouth, nipping at his bottom lip as they jerked each off, bodies pressed together as Cody started to rock into Obi-Wan’s grip.
The heat started to build in his gut. He tightened his grip around Obi-Wan’s cock, stroking him quicker as he began to fuck into Obi-Wan’s hand, desperate to come as he pushed his tongue past Obi-Wan’s lips.
Obi-Wan came, his back arched and hips pressed into Cody’s touch as he gasped softly, looking up at Cody through copper lashes as he kept working his cock over—digging his thumb into the tip of it as Cody panted against his mouth, his balls getting heavy as he got closer.
He came hard, teeth clashing as he shoved their mouths together again, fucking into Obi-Wan’s fist as he made a mess between them.
“We didn’t even make it to fingering,” Obi-Wan muttered against Cody’s lips, smiling as Cody nipped his bottom lip.
“It’s been a while, and you’re even more beautiful than I remember,” Cody murmured, “And besides, we’ve got time, remember?”
“Yeah, we do,” Obi-Wan agreed as Cody pulled back to look at him, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he smiled at him.
Cody bent back down to press another kiss to Obi-Wan’s lips.
“Besides,” he whispered, “I’m getting old. Now come here and cuddle with me until we need to get cleaned up.”
Obi-Wan’s nose scrunched up, “I hate the feeling of dry come. You know that.”
“Yeah, but it’s my come, and it’s only like twenty minutes,” Cody said, collapsing beside Obi-Wan as he lay on his back.
Obi-Wan huffed out a laugh, pressing against Cody’s side to rest his head on Cody’s collarbone.
“Twenty minutes,” he agreed, “But only because you came back from the dead.”
Cody just hummed, pressing his cheek against Obi-Wan’s head.
“I forgot I even had this.”
Obi-Wan looked up, rolling his eyes as he looked at the lightsaber in Cody’s hand.
“I can’t believe you still have that,” Obi-Wan said, shaking his head, “And that you bothered to bring it to the new house. We might have more room, but that doesn’t mean we need all the junk we left with.”
“You’re the one who packed the boxes,” Cody reminded him, laughing as Rex leaned over his shoulder to peer at the plastic blue blade.
“Hey, that’s cool! Why do you have a toy?” Rex asked, and Cody grinned at him.
“It was a gift,” he murmured, “From Obi-Wan when we were still dating. I kept it because I loved it then and still love it now. And it’s not a toy. I’m pretty sure it cost him about two hundred dollars back then. That was like a whole month of pay.”
“It was about a week’s pay,” Obi-Wan corrected with a laugh, “And I’d forgotten that I was the one who bought it for you.”
Cody nodded, “It was a few weeks before I enlisted. I made you hold onto it for me the whole time I was away. I thought that Jango would toss it if he got the chance.”
“Oh, I suppose I do remember that,” Obi-Wan said with a small laugh, “Well, I’m glad that I didn’t throw it out after all. It’s a good memory.”
“It is,” Cody agreed, “I always thought I could be a Jedi in another life, you know. Although I guess I’d be better as a soldier.”
“I don’t know. I think you’d make a rather amazing Jedi,” Obi-Wan mused, “Very hot.”
“Because obviously, that’s the most important part,” Cody laughed.
“Well, it can’t hurt, anyway.”
“But it’s an overnight camping trip,” Rex murmured, “And I’m not sure that I want to go.”
“It’s the Boy Scouts,” Cody said, kneeling on one knee as he looked at his brother, “I thought you loved Boy Scouts. You’ve been having so much fun, and besides, the Appalachian Trail was one of my favorite trips when I was your age. Honestly, it was probably my only good memory of Jango.”
“But I’ll be gone for three days,” Rex said, looking up at him, “Without you and Obi, Echo, and Jesse. I’ll miss Omega coming to live with us.”
“Well, Omega is going to be here for a very long time,” Obi-Wan said as he walked in the door, toeing off his shoes and setting down his backpack before walking over to the both of them, “She’s going to stay here with us permanently, remember? Besides, she’s only an infant, Rex. She won’t even know that you’re gone.”
“And I’ll have to sleep in a tent,” Rex said, looking slightly unsure.
“And you’ll get to hang out with some new friends and have a campfire and learn some things about being outdoors,” Cody reminded him, “And when you come back, the chicks should be ready to go into the coop.”
“And the starts will be ready to plant,” Rex mumbled, “You’ll need my help with that, won’t you?”
“They’ll be fine for an extra day or so,” Cody promised, “Now, why don’t you tell me what this is really about? I thought we were past the refusing to go out. I’m going to be right here when you get back, remember?”
“But you’re going onto the base,” Rex said, shifting as he looked down at his feet, “Last time you went to the base, you didn’t come back for a really long time and- and Obi told us that you weren’t ever coming home.”
“I’m going to the base to clean out my things and get the last of the paperwork that will officially retire me,” Cody murmured as he put his hands on Rex’s shoulders and squeezed gently, “There won’t be any meetings or missions or emergency calls, Rex. I’m retiring. I want to spend more time with you and everyone else. That’s why Obi-Wan went back to work, remember?”
Rex looked over at Obi-Wan, frowning at the sweater he wore over his button-down.
“You look like a professor,” he informed him.
“Perhaps that’s because I am one,” Obi-Wan said, a soft smile on his face, “I’m even employed at the uni nearby, remember?”
“College,” Cody supplied when Rex’s face scrunched in confusion, “You’ll have to forgive his England-isms. He can’t help it.”
“Uni is just short for university,” Obi-Wan said, “You call them universities here. It’s in the name. You’re just being pedantic.”
“They might be in the name, but no matter how many times you try to fight me on it, we call them colleges,” Cody replied, “And I know that you know that. Dinner is just about done. It’s in the oven.”
“Mmm, I definitely could get used to that,” Obi-Wan said, walking over and leaning down to press a kiss to Cody’s lips and then one to Rex’s head, “What do you say we talk about this over dinner, Rex? Maybe we can appease some of your fears. I know you’re upset that Cody can’t join as a scout leader until next year, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t go now.”
“Will he even have time to by next year?” Rex frowned, “Or will he be working again?”
“You don’t have to talk to me like I’m not here,” Cody cut in, “I’m going to find a job eventually, yes, but I’m taking it slow, remember? I’m still injured, even if it doesn’t always look like it.”
“I know,” Rex agreed, “But I still really want you to be my scout leader.”
“I’ll make sure that I have time,” Cody promised, “Now let’s go let Anakin and the rest of the kids know that dinner will be down. You know how Echo and Jesse will pout if Obi-Wan is home and we didn’t tell them right away.”
“I know,” Rex murmured, growing quiet for a moment before seeming to decide, “Maybe I can try to go for at least the night. But you promise you’ll pick me up if I hate it?”
“I promise,” Cody replied, “Now, let’s get ready for dinner.”
Obi-Wan’s arms were tight around Cody as blood pounded in his ears, his hands gripping tightly to Obi-Wan as he tried to catch his breath—his chest tight and adrenaline running even as he tried to make it stop.
“It’s okay, it’s okay. I’ve got you,” Obi-Wan promised against Cody’s temple, the warmth from his body leaching into Cody’s chilled bones as Obi-Wan rocked them both gently.
“I know,” Obi-Wan murmured, “I know. It’s alright, Cody. You’re safe here with me.”
“Fuck, fuck,” Cody gasped out, the panic that had clawed at his chest still leaving something hollow inside of him even as it faded, “Fuck.”
Obi-Wan’s hand found Cody’s cheek, and he turned Cody’s head so that he was looking at Obi-Wan.
“It was just a nightmare. It’s over now. You’re safe here, at home with us,” Obi-Wan whispered, “There’s nothing to be scared of here.”
Cody pressed his forehead to Obi-Wan’s shoulder, feeling like his chest might crack if he tried to breathe. He curled tighter into the man as the grief finally set in.
“They died,” Cody’s voice was weak, “They died, and I’m alive, and I don’t know how to deal with that. I don’t know how it’s fair. I- I can’t-.”
“It wasn’t fair,” Obi-Wan agreed softly, “But I don’t regret that you are with us, Cody. It was a blessing for us. Even if I don’t believe in God, I was almost willing to when I saw your face after everything.”
“I can’t sleep without seeing their faces,” Cody said, “It doesn’t matter if it’s a nightmare or just a dream; I can’t forget what happened.”
“I don’t think you’ll ever be able to,” Obi-Wan replied, his face soft and sad, “But I don’t think you’d want to either. They were your brothers and sisters, even if it wasn’t blood. Sometimes, the people that choose to stay are more important than the ones obligated, and I think we’ve both learned that.”
“I know.”
Cody’s voice wavered, the back of his throat burning as something inside of him cracked, hot, angry tears falling down his face as he started to cry.
“I’ve got you,” Obi-Wan promised, rubbing his back, “It’s okay. I’ve got you.”
“Leia! Luke! For the love of-!”
“Oh, let them be,” Ahsoka waved Anakin off, “It’s just a sprinkler, Skyguy. We have a change of clothes for them anyway. It’s a picnic. Let them enjoy themselves.”
“I would have enjoyed it if they’d agreed to wear their swimsuits,” Anakin grumbled, bouncing Omega in his lap as he looked down at her with a grin, “Wouldn’t I have, Omega? You would have put a swimsuit on for me, wouldn’t you? Because you are the best behaved of everyone right now.”
Omega cooed at him, and Obi-Wan laughed, even as Echo tucked himself further into his arms, seemingly tuckered out despite only having been there for a few hours.
“He’s the only one who can’t talk back to you,” Cody deadpanned, but Anakin nodded.
“Exactly,” Anakin cooed at her, “Once you learn to say no, we’re all doomed because you are certainly one of the cutest babies I’ve ever seen.”
“Dad! Dad!”
Cody huffed as Rex slammed into his side, levelling a look at him as Rex’s expression turned guilty.
“I’m sorry,” he said, “But Fives wants to play, and we really want to go! Please? It’s just over to the jungle gym!”
Cody peered over at the crowded playground, frowning as he looked back at Rex and Jesse.
“Why don’t you stay with your brother for a bit?” he suggested, “We’re going to be eating in just a minute, and then all three of you can go play.”
Rex huffed but sat down even as Jesse frowned.
“No playing?” he asked, pouting.
“Lunch, then play,” Obi-Wan corrected.
“I’ll even go over and watch so you can go to the monkey bars,” Ahsoka offered. Jesse sat down, apparently appeased by her offer.
“Luke and Leia are drenched,” Rex informed them.
“We can see,” Anakin said, grimacing, “They’re going to get the blanket all wet.”
“I brought towels,” Cody said, gesturing to them, “They’ll dry, I promise.”
“Luke! Leia! Do you want the blue juice or the red?” Anakin called, and Obi-Wan laughed as they skittered over, looking excited as they sat on the blanket beside their father.
“Blue! Blue!” they both chanted, and Anakin sighed, leaning over to grab the Hugs from the bags they’d brought.
“Blue it is,” he agreed, “Now, is everyone hungry?”
“I could eat,” Cody murmured, reaching his hand out until he found Obi-Wan’s, brushing his fingers over his husband’s knuckles, “What do you think, Obi?”
“I’m starving,” Obi-Wan replied, “So why don’t we unpack the sandwiches and get eating?”
Obi-Wan leaned back as everyone started passing things out, taking in the warmth of his husband’s hand and Echo’s bony elbow against his ribs—the sun shining brightly down on them as he peered up at it for a moment.
He had to shield his eyes with his hand, and he sighed, looking at the blue sky for a long moment before glancing back down at the combined hands—their rings glinting in the light.
There may have been no honor in death.
But he couldn’t help but think there was peace in life.
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Last Edited Mon 30 Jan 2023 09:42AM UTC
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