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“Hey, Suguru. Can I come in?” It was the tone that set him off. When his name rolled off Satoru’s tongue, he already knew whatever came next would be surprising, to say the least. He took a deep breath and sighed, looking at his somewhat-estranged friend leaning on his doorway.
Oh boy.
They hadn’t seen each other in a while and this surprise visit was definitely not what he had been expecting when he went to answer the doorbell. Satoru’s body language was a mix of forced casualness and jittery energy. He was slumping over in a way that was highly reminiscent of their earlier school days, when he got Suguru in trouble and then felt bad about it, crawling into his room not to apologize, but to make sure Suguru wasn’t mad. Usually Suguru was mad, but it tended to melt away when faced with the kicked puppy eyes and the nervous lip-biting. He was absolutely convinced Satoru did it on purpose, because he knew Suguru’s dumb Alpha instincts would never be able to resist it.
So.
He knew something was going on, and at the same time he also knew himself well enough to know that he wouldn’t be able to refuse whatever stupid thing Satoru wanted to suggest. At least he was aware whenever he was being played. With that in mind and fully resigned to his fate, Suguru let him inside the small apartment, made him sit at the table and asked him what he wanted to eat.
It was a very familiar routine they had, even if it was a bit rusty now. Satoru was always, constantly munching on sweets but he was never eating anything; so early on in their acquaintance Suguru decided it was his responsibility to make sure Satoru was fed, rested and happy. Satoru was, in general, pretty bad at taking care of himself – if left to his own devices, he would eat only candy, never sleep, forget to take his suppressants and just buy new underwear each month rather than do his own laundry.
As a teenager, Suguru’s natural sense of responsibility got all muddled up with his desire to protect and provide and all of that translated into feeling like it was his personal duty to take care of Satoru. As an adult – he knew better. However, knowing better didn’t mean that they weren’t subjected to falling for the same sort of patterns they had in the past. Suguru put a bowl of fried egg rice in front of Satoru’s face and gave him chopsticks. Satoru laughed.
“You know, I’m at the age in which I can feed myself somewhat competently,” but he picked up the chopsticks and started eating without having to be told. His face softened and his shoulders relaxed a little, looking at Suguru with this sort of fondness that was both familiar and long forgotten.
“Hmmm, I’m sure you can,” Suguru said, trying to keep a straight face, “In that case, you can tell me what you had for breakfast and lunch, and I’ll believe you.”
“That’s not fair, I knew I was coming to see you today,” Satoru said, smiling at him, “Suguru likes taking care of me, who am I to deny him the opportunity to do it?”
“How noble of you.”
It was a little bit like that, wasn’t it? Satoru loved it when Suguru fussed over him, he liked being spoiled and pampered and taken care of. He even liked being chastised sometimes, when he was doing something stupid, just so he would see Suguru focusing his attention on him. And as much as all that should've bothered Suguru, it still felt good to be needed like that.
Alpha types came in all shapes and sizes, all of them with various quirks and patterns. All of them tended to be controlling and dominant. They tended to get attached too strongly, and got possessive easily. Sometimes it was affectionately referred to as territorial, and Suguru thought that it sounded gross, he wasn’t an ill-trained dog that wanted to shepherd sheep, nor did he ever want to associate himself with the hot-headed idiots who couldn’t keep it in their pants and went feral when sniffing Omega pheromones. He drilled self-control into himself, spent hours meditating, kept his emotions on as tight of a leash as possible and suppressed his ruts to the point that he couldn’t remember when he last went through one.
He liked to think of himself as calm, cool and collected, as level headed as he could be - it wasn't technically true. Suguru was prone to anxious episodes, often overthinking, biting his nails and chewing his cuticles. Satoru would often act like comforting blanket for him, cooling his overworked mind, soothing the thoughts that threatened to overflow. Suguru's hands were fidgeting, picking at his nails nervously, and while they were growing up, Satoru would put his palm over Suguru's hands and stop him from picking at his nails because it was such a tell, it was so obvious. Now, he has to stop himself.
“So what brings you here?” He asked, getting straight to the point of things. “Not that I’m not happy to see you, but it’s been a while since we last spoke -” ten months and three weeks to be more precise, not that Suguru was keeping track intentionally, but you know - “So I assume you’re here for a reason.”
“Can’t I just be here because I missed you?”
“Tsk, I wish it were that easy with you, Satoru.”
The other man sighed and raised his hands, laughing.
“Ah, you got me. I do admit I have some ulterior motives, I’m afraid.” Satoru bit his lips and oh, this was definitely suspicious, Suguru was not going to like it one bit. He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back against the kitchen cupboard.
“I’m all ears. ”
“So. Like. Where do I even begin? You know how it’s generally common knowledge that male Omegas tend to have a really hard time with pregnancies? Well, that tends to increase as you age, you know, - If you spent most of your adult life on heavy suppressants like I did, your hormones are gonna end up being all messed up from it.”
“You only ended up on the hardcore stuff because you were so bad at remembering to take them!”
It was really a wonder that Suguru survived his teenage years with his sanity intact, considering all the time he spent around Satoru and his bubbling pre-heat pheromones, because the idiot kept missing his doses, so he was never completely safe to be around. To make matters worse, he had his weird growth sprouts, above average muscle mass and a freakishly fast metabolism, so his dosages were always more of a guessing game rather than an exact science. A guessing game that often failed and no one could really predict how Satoru’s body would react to everything going on.
“Come on, you know it was more complicated than that. I’ve always reacted poorly to any other stuff, and it’s not like I could go without them! You know my heats were terrible. Can you blame me for not wanting to deal with that anymore?”
They truly were. Before he met Satoru, Suguru always believed heats were just an excuse to be horny for a few days. Meanwhile, Satoru’s heats were painful, he got feverish and sick from them, episodes of intense nausea getting triggered by random foods and overly strong smells. He got moody and clingy too, though Suguru never really knew if that was because of the heat or because of the unpleasant effects of it.
When his doctor finally approved him for taking the super strong stuff, he took it without blinking, if only to not deal with another spontaneous, irregular heat-cycle ever again.
“Anyways – the stuff I was taking was never for long term use. The last time I spoke to my doctor, she said I should really consider whether I want kids or not.” And with the way he said, he trailed off, looking to the side and staring out the window rather than looking at Suguru. “If I do want kids, I should start working on that, because it’s still possible now, but there’s no guarantee for later.”
Oh, hell. This was shaping up to be much worse than he anticipated.
“Satoru.”
“Yes?”
“What does this have to do with me?” He asked, doing his best to keep his voice leveled and calm. Still though, he probably didn’t succeed in masking his conflicted feelings because Satoru’s expression changed. His eyebrows were raised, frowning slightly before softening.
“Suguru, come on.” He said with a smile, lips quirking and eyelashes lowering. “Are you really gonna make me say it?” Charming, very charming.
Suguru was not falling for this.
“If you can come all the way here to say something to me, you better say it, Satoru.”
“Fine, you're being so difficult with me.” Satoru chews on his bottom lip, and moves his mouth from side to side. His nose scrunches and his eyebrows turned downwards, “I’m here to ask for your help.”
“My help with what?”
“You know – pregnancy. Getting knocked up. Baby-making. The birds and the bees, do I have to say it in any other way too?” He made a face, nose scrunching up before looking at Suguru with overly big eyes, all fake innocence and sweetness and specifically, on purpose and asking, “Suguru, do you wanna make a baby with me?”
Damn.
His head kinda blue-screened there for a second.
Suguru remembered how he had pressed cold compresses to Satoru’s forehead and throat, trying to cool him down during a particularly bad heat in which his fever spiked. He remembered glassy eyes and red cheeks, and Satoru clinging to him and pressing his face in the crook of his shoulder. He used to say that Suguru smelled nice, Suguru smelled comforting, Suguru’s smell was the only one that didn’t make his stomach turn. Satoru said Suguru’s presence cut through all the fog in his head and kept him steady.
Suguru remembered how he had stuffed cotton balls up his nose so he wouldn’t get drunk on the scent of Satoru’s heat. He used to take fistfuls of suppressants and ice-cold showers and bite his own fist to keep himself in check while Satoru grinded against his thigh to get himself off, body shaking against Suguru’s.
The thing is – it would have been so very easy to take advantage of that, all that thick hazy fog of lust and need. He could have stolen a kiss, at least, but then again, if he had done that, he wouldn’t have been the man Satoru trusted him to be, would he? Heats were so deeply vulnerable and personal, Satoru wasn’t in his right mind.
He had allowed Satoru to cling to him and cuddle against him, and he told himself: if they were going to kiss, if they were going to make love, it had to be because Satoru wanted it just as much as he did, without the weird heat hormones running through his body. Satoru had to want it when he was clear headed too, and he had to want it for keeps because Suguru didn’t want many things in his life, but he wanted someone of his own, and a life shaped like them, kids and family and a sense of belonging.
Nothing ever came out of it. Neither of them was ever willing to bridge the gap when they were sober.
Which was – fine, for the most part. People weren’t supposed to meet the love of their life at 16, despite the painful pining and yearning. It was supposed to be fine.
Except that it wasn’t because… because…
Well.
It sounded like a joke. They never made a move on each other, Satoru never expressed any sort of interest in him beyond the hormonal laced ramblings of heat, and then over the years their relationship grew more and more distant. They were simply living different lives in different worlds.
Meanwhile, Gojo suddenly thought it was a good idea to show up at his doorstep and ask Suguru to get him pregnant.
“Why me? You could ask anyone else. Surely there's a better option out there for the Gojo heir than me.”
“You’re kidding, right?”
Satoru looked at him like he’d been slapped, and Suguru felt a little bad over it too, but he was also feeling – petty and annoyed and upset.
“It’s fair to ask, right? It’s not like we’re exactly close anymore, nowhere near the level in which you can ask me to be a sperm donor for your kid.”
“A sperm donor? Are you for real – do you think that’s what I want?” Satoru’s voice grew louder.
“To be honest I don’t know what you want, Satoru.”
And the truth of that stings like a bitch, because there was a time in which he knew everything about Satoru, he knew him based on his face, his voice, posture, his smell. He thought he knew what Satoru wanted. The most heartbreaking part of it was that he always thought Satoru knew him right back.
“Suguru, come on - ”
Maybe it showed on his face that he was upset, and who wouldn’t be?
Satoru got up from his chair and walked around the table to where Suguru was leaning. He got close to him, close enough that Suguru could smell the scent of him, his expensive cologne and beneath that there was the scent he recognized, the candy sweetness scent of Satoru’s heat bubbling under his skin.
He looked at Satoru’s face, the way his eyes shined and his lips were unnaturally flushed. And he could smell him, familiar and soothing, and he couldn’t be upset with him anymore. All his anger melted away because of proximity and closeness, and he inhaled as deeply as Satoru smiled and pressed himself against him, arm around his shoulders.
“This is so unfair,” he whined as he resisted the urge to push his nose against Satoru’s throat to scent him, “You’re so unfair.”
“Don’t be upset with me, Suguru.” He was so sweet about it too, rubbing his cheek against Suguru’s and murmuring in his ear, “Don’t be upset with me, Suguru.”
“You’re such an asshole,” And he was manipulative too, because he knew, he knew it would be impossible for Suguru to be upset with him when he smelled like home and Suguru wanted to drown in him.
“I know, I know, I’m sorry.” Suguru wore his hair tied while he was around the house, but Satoru pulled the tie and unraveled his bun, ran his finger through Suguru’s hair like they were teens again, “I need you to listen to me, though, and this is the fastest way to do it.”
“I don’t want to listen to you, Satoru,” but he wrapped his arms around him regardless, and pulled him tight against his body, leeching warmth and relaxing against his better judgment, “You don’t just waltz into my life and ask me to make a baby with you and then what? What am I supposed to think, Satoru?”
“Hmmm – You’re still the only one that smells good to me. I never met another Alpha that smelled good to me, you know that? I don’t want anyone else, Suguru.”
“But you didn’t want me either, because if you did – you would have been here sooner and you wouldn’t have - ”
Satoru pressed a kiss to his cheek as he talked.
“I wouldn’t what, Suguru?” and then he kissed him again on the other cheek, “Talk to me.”
“You know I want kids, Satoru.”
“I know, yeah.” Satoru pulled away from him slightly, cupped Suguru’s cheeks in both his hands and made Suguru look at him. His smile was beautifully bright. “So do I. That’s why I’m here.” He pressed his forehead to Suguru’s, rubbed their noses together.
“No, Satoru, that’s not - ” he sighed and closed his eyes, palms tightening around Satoru’s middle, “I want a family. I want – Don’t offer something like that if you don’t want the same thing.”
“You really trust me so little? Is that what Suguru thinks of me, that I’d just use him like that only to disappear afterwards?”
He put a hand over Satoru’s, turned his head and kissed the inside of his palm. Nosed against his wrist.
“We don’t want the same things, Satoru.”
“How do you know what I want, hmmm?”
“You never said anything. You never said anything at all, never.”
Satoru shrugged.
“What was I supposed to say? We were kids back then, and I never thought – there’s a lot of things I could say to you now, about how I was scared to spook you or how I thought I’d be over it by now, or how whenever I think about how I want to spend my future, it’s always with you.”
“Why did you never say anything to me? You just – disappear on me for months then you come back…” He was so frustrated with Satoru, but he’d also been in love with him since he was sixteen.
“I move fast. It took me a long time to make-up my mind, Suguru, but I’m here now and I know what I want -”
“You want kids.”
“I want kids with you.”
One time, when Satoru was in his heat, Suguru had to hold him through it. He spooned and held him close, his knees bumping in the back of Satoru’s knees, his chest against his back. Kissed the crown of his head. Kept a pillow on his lap because he was so hard throughout it all and he didn’t want Satoru to feel it.
He remembered how all his senses were overwhelmed by him and it was like something in his brain got rewired, because he just knew he would never want anyone else ever again.
“This can’t be just a heat thing, though. It can’t be just because you’re all high on pheromones and they’re compatible with mine, it has to be more than that, you need to be sure this is what you want.”
“I’m sure, I’m sure, I’m so sure.”
Satoru pressed his mouth against his in kiss that was startling in its force and absoluteness. It was about twelve years overdue, and their teeth clicked together. It was too uncoordinated to be a good kiss, too desperate. Too much spit. Tongues licking against lips.
“You made me wait for you so long, you made me wait so long.” His fingers were grabbing at the hem of Satoru’s shit, pushing underneath to touch his skin.
“I know, I know, I know.” Satoru’s dropping kissed on his face, his jaw, his throat, “Sorry, I’m sorry.”
A bit like devouring each other out of love, a consuming passion that had been waiting there for such a long time and it was finally allowed to break free.
They were pulling at each other’s clothes, and Suguru was so hard already. He wanted him, wanted him, wanted, so badly he was shaking with it. Satoru pulled down his pants, not all the way off, but just enough so that Suguru’s cock was free and exposed for him to wrap his hand around it.
“God, you’re so hard, Suguru. Is that for me? Is that big hard cock of yours all for me?” And he smiled at him, eyes gleaming and cheeks flushed and kiss-bitten lips, “Wanna show me what you can do with it?”
“Satoru - ”
“Fuck me, fuck me, please fuck me, I need you -”
They ended up fucking standing up, with Satoru bent over the kitchen countertop and Suguru’s mouth pressed against the back of his neck. They were still fully dressed for it, too hurried and needy for each other to undress properly. Satoru was all wet and rubbing himself off, unrestricted moans urging him on while Suguru pushed inside him. His pace was hard and fast and very poorly coordinated, but Satoru didn’t mind.
“Just like that, Suguru, just like that, don’t stop, don’t stop.”
He felt Satoru coming around his cock, tight wet pussy gripping and pulsating around him just as his knot was swelling inside him. It was far from being the tender, romantic first time he envisioned in his youth, too quick for either of them to be even remotely satisfied, but that was fine because he didn’t think a lifetime would be enough to fully satisfy the desperate, aching longing he had felt for Satoru all those years.
He came inside him, but didn’t knot him, because that would just mean a forced break between rounds which he had no intention of sitting through. Instead, he pulled out of him and made Satoru turn around, dropped to his knees in front of him and pressed his mouth against his cunt, tongue dipping between the slick folds of him, licking and slurping and sucking on his clit. There were juices dripping down his chin, the taste of him and Satoru together making him feel dizzy and light-headed, something he knew, he knew he’d never get enough of.
“Baby, you’re gonna make me come again like that - ”
Satoru’s fingers cradled the back of his head, gripping his hair tightly and pulling him in, hips rolling and grinding against Suguru’s face. Wasn’t it just lovely, though, he thought fondly, smirking as his tongue was fucking and curling inside Satoru’s hole and his nose rubbing against his clit. Satoru was a greedy, needy lover that demanded pleasure with his whole body while Suguru desperately wanted to give it to him.
His hands gripped Satoru’s ass so he could press his tongue inside him deeper, the taste of both of them combined being overwhelmed by Satoru’s slick, flooding his tastebuds as he came again against Suguru’s face, shaking thighs and body spasming.
He helped pull Satoru’s feet out of his pants before sitting up again, took his face in his hands to kiss him, letting Satoru taste himself in Suguru’s mouth. Satoru kissed him back deliberately, with long licks in his mouth and sucking around his tongue, clinging to him and pressing himself against Suguru’s body. His cock was still hard, though, knot swollen and red as it slipped between Satoru’s wet thighs to settle between his folds. He found himself rocking against him, dragging his knot over Satoru’s clit, enjoying the slip and slide motion.
“God, you’re still hard.” Satoru’s thighs tensed, tightening around him and grinding his pussy over Suguru’s length. The curve of Suguru’s knot seemed to be his favorite part, where he got the most friction out of, so that’s what he focused on, putting pressure there for both of them as Suguru’s cock got wetter from his motions. “Can you put it inside me again?”
He grabbed Satoru by the back of his thighs and hoisted him up, ass sitting on the countertop and his heels digging in Suguru’s back. He pushed inside him again, felt how Satoru shuddered at the penetration, hypersensitive, nerves on fire, arms around Suguru’s torso and nails scratching in his skin. Nuzzled his face against the crook of Suguru’s shoulder, mouth settling over his pulse point and sucking a love mark into his skin.
His knot settled against Satoru’s entrance, throbbing painfully, unable to push inside despite feeling the need to do it. You can’t just knot someone from the outside in, but there’s still an instinct to try. It was a deliciously frustrating feeling that made him growl, hips moving in small, tight circles to drag over Satoru’s walls. Satoru hissed through clenched teeth as he pushed against him, Suguru’s knot testing the limits of how much his hole could take. Suguru’s heart was full of helpless affection, grateful and protective and all those dangerous, soft things that had always been there, but were now allowed to roam freely through his head and his heart.
“Hey Suguru – hey. Look at me.” Satoru ran his fingers through his hair and pushed it out of his face, foreheads touching and giving him a quick peck on the lips, “Hey.”
“Hello,” Suguru said and he laughed against his mouth, slightly overwhelmed about the whole situation because Satoru’s eyes were huge, and blue and beautiful, and he was sure he was going to drown in them, and he couldn’t believe this was happening because he had been wishing and fantasizing over this for so long, and Satoru’s body was hot and tight and he was so, so wet, and he smelled like heaven and just felt right in his arms.
The winter sun was setting earlier, warm sunset light coming in through his kitchen window and making Satoru’s skin look golden bright, beautifully glowing smile and long lashes, blown out pupils and looking at Suguru as if he loved him. It was so easy to get lost in that. Beyond the physical intimacy of it, there was a swelling heat in his chest that rushed through him, dizzy drunk on feeling. His world felt small, and narrow and hot, blue and tender and beloved.
“Does it feel good, Satoru?” he asked him, without filtering the emotions in his head. Satoru looked at him strangely, too fond and too warm and too much, cradled the back of his head and pulled him in deeper. Suguru wanted to lose himself inside him. “Can you come like this?”
“Yeah, probably, let me just… ah – “ Satoru’s hand slipped between them to touch himself while Suguru fucked him, his eyes rolling back as his pussy walls flutter and twitch around Suguru’s cock.
Suguru kissed him, lips slipping over each other, tongue licking into his mouth as Satoru moaned, kissed him like he wanted to kiss him since he saw him leaning on his doorway. Suguru kissed him, and kissed him and kissed him, and made love to him, and rocked into him slow and steady because he wanted to feel how Satoru unraveled for him, savor the way his thighs trembled around Suguru’s waist and they held each other close.
When Suguru first met Satoru, he took one look at him and scoffed, thinking he was some spoiled little rich boy born with a silver spoon in his mouth and no worries in life. In all honesty, his assessment had been right – Satoru was an only child surrounded by adults, parents that loved each other and grandparents that fawned over him. He had never gone to a funeral because there was no need. The only thing Satoru ever had to bury was his pet hamster. Meanwhile, by the time they met, Suguru’s parents had both been dead for over a year, and he was living with his father’s sister. His aunt was nice, but she was also young, barely out of college and she had no idea how to deal with a grieving teenager. She did her best, but they were never close, and as soon as he was able to, he moved out.
Then, between the ages of 20 to 26, Satoru had to speedrun through six different funerals, back to back. Every year Suguru was being invited to another Gojo Family funeral, and by the time Satoru’s mom died, he was the only Gojo left. Suguru remembered how Satoru had looked during the funeral, like a grieving ice prince that couldn’t be touched. Satoru had been so beautiful and stoic and had looked achingly lonely.
Neither of them had anyone. They were all alone, save from this small, wonderful little bubble of warmth they could build around each other.
They were bound to be overly needy for each other.
On a rational level, Suguru was aware there were very complex anatomical reactions which caused this heightened sensitivity in him. Alphas responded to Omegas, Satoru had entered his heat cycle and that meant that there was a whole cocktail of pheromones and hormones and amino-acids and chemicals in his body that were specifically designed to make him alluring, that this was all meant to stimulate bonding between mated couples and increase intimacy.
There were books written about it and they were really mandatory reading in highschool sex ed, how one shouldn’t confuse the chemistry of heat with actual feelings, how the chemistry of it was volatile but ultimately it was short lived. ‘Don’t confuse heat with love’ as the saying went, but at least when it came to Satoru, he knew that he was in love with him beyond any shadow of a doubt.
It really was that simple.
“Suguru, come back to bed, it’s cold without you.” He whined.
“I can get you an extra blanket.”
“I don’t want an extra blanket, I want you.” Satoru said, his voice lower and breathier, a small gasp escaping him when Suguru came over and touched the bruise on his throat with his thumb. His spine arched and his shoulders relaxed and Suguru never thought he would be so fascinated by the discoloration on someone’s skin.
He kept wanting to poke at that bite mark he left on Satoru’s neck. He wanted to keep it as bright purple as it was now, because it was so startlingly arousing to see physical reminders of their passion. There was a bubble of satisfaction and sheer pride that pulsed somewhere behind his ribs whenever he looked at Satoru and Satoru looked back at him and smiled, and Suguru’s eyes would be drawn to his lips and the dimples in his cheeks and he gentle slope of his neck – then he would be reminded of how that part of Satoru’s skin tasted, the sounds he made when they were kissed and the way his nipples felt when Suguru pressed the flat of his tongue against them.
The past few days had been a constant assault on his senses.
It was like this -
Once they started, they couldn’t stop.
They couldn’t go more than half an hour without being all over each other, fucking like they were the last two people on Earth and they had to repopulate.
Satoru said things like, “Let’s make a baby, Suguru,” as he pulled him in, his voice was needy and alluring, and he knew Suguru liked it, Suguru could never resist when he said please, when Satoru said “I need you, Suguru, please come inside me, please knot me, Suguru” it went straight to his head and his cock and his face softened – Let’s make a baby, Suguru, and he kept falling into him, head between Satoru’s creamy thighs, mouth against his pretty pussy and rock hard the entire time.
He left wet kisses on Satoru’s inner thigh, gentle bites and sucking marks against the sensitive skin. Nuzzled against his mound, kissed his slit – tender at first and then harder. There was a rhythm to Satoru’s body though, the strong and steady thump thump thump of his heart and his blood pumping through his veins. He would feel how his pulse quickened and relaxed.
Suguru purposefully looked for all these places on Satoru’s body where his skin was thin and soft, and he could touch his fingers or his lips to them and he’d feel his blood thrumming warmly through him. In those moments, a sense of calm and comfort settled deeply over him, when Satoru filled all his senses, and instead of that deep hunger which threatened to burn through him, the sheer force of need, he felt – different .
Whenever they weren’t fucking, they still had to deal with Satoru’s heat. There were spikes of intense need and want, but also spikes of pain and fever that no amount of anything could actually cure, so they were to be waited out. Satoru kept his head in Suguru’s lap while they were on the couch, or he cuddled against his chest. He fell asleep for short naps and woke up with fever bright eyes.
In the morning, Suguru made himself coffee. He made hot chocolate too, buttered toast and set them in front of Satoru. He didn’t think much of it, as it seemed natural to do so, but Satoru picked it up and then looked at Suguru fondly.
“You buttered my toast.” He sighed, “Of course you did.”
“Hmmm – do you want cherry preserve or blackberry?” he asked, holding up two jars for him to pick.
“Cherry, please.” Satoru held out his hand, and took the jar of cherry preserve and spread it on his toast. “It’s been a very long time since I’ve had breakfast like this with someone.” That made Suguru pause and realize the same could be said for him, he literally didn’t remember the last time he had breakfast with someone. Next to him, Satoru was munching away at his cherry toast, the warm glow of a smile tugging at his mouth and his sleepy face.
Suguru wanted to tell him that they could have breakfast together properly tomorrow as well, and the day after that. Wake up a little later and make scrambled eggs. Knock elbows together while moving around the kitchen.
Satoru pulled him back to bed afterwards, bumped their noses together and playfully bit at Suguru’s lower lip. There was a mischievous glint in his eyes as he laid on his back and spread himself out for Suguru’s enjoyment. A bit like a willing sacrifice, but with the sharp edge of his smile Suguru wasn’t sure which one of them was supposed to be the prey.
Suguru touched the back of his knee, caressed upwards, towards the plush flesh on the inside of his thigh. His breath hitched when he reached too close to slick white hair between Satoru’s legs. Touched his slit without pushing inside, leaned over him to kiss and lick into Satoru’s mouth as his fingers teased him, pinching his lips together and making them rub against each other. Kissed down Satoru’s chest and bit his nipples, sucked them and rolled them with his tongue until they were hard, flushed dark pink with blood.
“Suguru,” Satoru whined.
“What do you want from me? Tell me, what do you need?” he knew he would do absolutely anything Satoru wanted from him.
He spread Satoru’s pussy lips and ran a fingertip over his vulva, then dipped two fingers inside him and crooking them in the tight wet heat of him. Satoru’s back arched off the bed and he moaned, fucking himself against Suguru’s fingers and grinding his clit against his palm. His core muscles tensed with each movement, thighs quivering and skin flushed. He was so wet Suguru could hear it, this lewd squelching noise as he pushed against his walls.
Heat made him sensitive and he came quickly, this intense, messy orgasm that left him shaking in Suguru’s arm. His pussy dripped, but just because he came once didn’t mean it was enough.
“Hmm, you know what I want?” Satoru suddenly pushed him down onto the bed and got on top of him, straddling him and putting his hands on his chest to keep him down on the mattress.
“Tell me,” He settled his hands over Satoru’s hips, rubbing in circles and patterns over his skin. He settled himself over Suguru’s cock, snuck the length of him between his folds, grinded his clit over him without letting him inside. “What do you need from me? How do you…?” Suguru hissed, teeth clenched. Satoru was slippery wet between his legs and was rubbing over his dick without allowing him to fuck him.
“Hmmm… don’t move, I want ...” Satoru closed his pretty blue eyes, pressed the hood of his pussy against Suguru’s knot and rolled over it, teasing both of them with the sensation. He wanted to push into him – Satoru was dripping over Suguru’s cock, he would slide in so easily , but instead he allowed himself to be sweetly tortured by him.
“Satoru, I…” I want you, I want to feel you, I need to kiss you, I….
“I want to sit on your face,” he said with a smile, and arousal shot through him viciously and mercilessly at that. It was probably visible in the way he flushed, how his eyes widened. Satoru figured it out and smirked, bent forward and kissed the tip of his nose before asking again, mischievous, “can I?”
“You can do whatever you want,” he answered with a laugh, feeling overwhelmed and incredulous, thinking it was crazy how much he wanted him, how much time he spent thinking about fucking Satoru and he never would have came close the real thing.
Satoru crawled over his body, knees on both sides of his head, hands gripping the headboard as he grinded against Suguru’s tongue. Swiped his clit against his nose. Dipped his tongue into his cunt to taste him. Dragged his nails over Satoru’s ass, slapped his buttocks to make him shout in surprise.
His face was a mess and Satoru moved faster, erratic, letting himself be fucked by Suguru’s tongue while babbling praises at him.
“You’re so good at this, Suguru.” he sounded dazed . “You’re going to make me come again, I’m so close.”
Suguru held his cock in a loose grip, wanting something to ease the pressure, if only for a second. He was going to lose his mind over Satoru before being able to knot him again.
He focused on licking and sucking on his clit until he felt the muscles in his core spasming and clenching, until he moaned, low and throaty. Satoru rode out the waves of his orgasm until he almost fell off him and landed on the bed with a woosh.
Suguru licked the taste off his lips, wiped his chin and cheeks of excess moisture and sat up to look at him. Satoru’s eyes were closed but his brows were furrowed, and he was catching his breath with big gulps of air. He swallowed deeply. There was a fine sheet of sweat on his body, and when Suguru touched the dips between his ribs, a shiver went through his. Long, white eyelashes fluttered open, and Satoru smiled at him.
“That was so fun. I feel like I should thank you for the ride.”
“Pff, you’re welcome.” He snorted a laugh and grabbed him by the ankle. Satoru yelped when he pulled him closer, leg resting on his shoulder, pressing a kiss against the side of his knee. “What should I do with you next?”
Satoru gasped when he felt the head of his cock rubbing against his entrance, not pushing inside yet but catching against his labia.
“I want you to fuck me until it hurts and I can’t come anymore.”
“I can do that.” He started pushing inside of him slowly, centimeter by centimeter, so Satoru could enjoy the sensation of being filled up by him. “I won’t stop until you tell me to.” Once he was completely inside, a shudder rocked his core and Satoru gasped underneath him.
When he started moving, it was slow, because he wanted to enjoy the tight drag of him around his cock. With Satoru’s leg over his shoulder like that, there was no room for him to move, he could do little more than lay there and moan.
“Fuck, that’s so deep.” His lips were pulled into a pleased smile, eyes closed and head pushed back. “You feel so huge. Please fuck me faster.” How was he supposed to refuse when he even said please ?
“Satoru, look at me.” Suguru cradled his jaw and kept his head still, refusing to admit to himself that his voice sounded so raw and hungry.
“Do you want me to look at you while you fuck me?” The question came out breathless and cut through with moans, but challenging and teasing, amused. He thrusted into Satoru harder to make him gasp. “Fuck, that’s it. You have to put your back into it if you wanna get me pregnant, Suguru”.
Suguru slammed into him so he would shut up, too busy making needy, pleasured sounds to talk anymore. It took very little to get Satoru thrashing and pulsating around his dick, coming undone beautifully before him. Gushing wet. He slowed down, stopped thrusting until Satoru’s muscles stopped contracting, letting him enjoy the fullness while his hips rocked gently.
Satoru blinked quickly, hazy and happy. Slid his leg off Suguru’s shoulder and around his waist, opened his arms to him in a silent request to be picked up.
“More?” he asked sweetly, arms around Suguru’s neck, settled in his lap, chest to chest and sharing the same breath.
“You’re insatiable,” he said, struggling to focus on anything else, think of motor engines and numbers and the economy, anything that wasn’t Satoru’s cunt and the slow, grinding rhythm of his hips rolling against the base of his knot.
“It’s this damn heat,” he said with a breathless laugh, deliberately squeezing him inside. “And the fact that I’m crazy about you.” Satoru pushed him on the bed again and towered over him. “Hold still, let me…”
Suguru was certain this qualified as some sort of unnatural torture, to be forced to look up at a beautiful omega in heat, who was touching himself in his lap, while Suguru’s cock was inside him, but he wasn’t moving, not how Suguru wanted him to.
“Satoru, what are you…?”
“Shhh, I can do this part myself. Do you like how I feel? Tell me.” He kept grinding into him deliberately with each word – head thrown back, spine arched. Breasts bouncing, dark pink nipples hard, voice teasing. “Come on, Suguru, baby , tell me how tight I am and how you can’t get enough of me.”
“Satoru.” Moaned out his name, closed his eyes. Fingers gripping Satoru’s thighs. “God, you’re so wet. You’re so wet for me - ”
“Yeah, that’s cause I can’t get enough of you, Suguru.” His voice broke around Suguru’s name.
Satoru reached out and grabbed his hair, urging Suguru to sit up, embracing him and pressing himself close, no distance between them. Satoru cradled the back of his head and kissed him, Suguru’s breath shuddering in his mouth,
“You kiss me like that,” Satoru whispered, raw and raspy against his lips “Like you’re drowning,”
Tongue sliding into his mouth, chasing the words off Satoru’s lips, smashing together, teeth nipping. Fingers through his hair, sweaty skin against his, the slip and slide, the building, mounting pressure and urgency.
The bed was screeching, headboard banging against the wall. Between them, there were moans and gasps and shared breaths.
“Satoru, I…”
“Kiss me, kiss me .”
They fucked like they could make up for lost time.
Suguru rolled him off and Satoru went easily, laid on his stomach over the damp, wrinkled sheets and he fucked into him from behind, pressed his chest against Satoru’s back and put his hand against his throat. Satoru was so wet his cock slipped out of him, and he whined and said, “please put it back inside me.”
What if you’re being too rough? he asked himself, but Satoru was mumbling things to him, gasping and mewling, needy and desperate and the best thing he ever heard in his life. He kept the same brutal pace until he came again screaming, right through the gushing wetness of his orgasm, until he yelled, “fuck, that hurts, don’t stop, that’s perfect, don’t stop, don’t stop” until his eyes rolled and he went slack in his arms.
Suguru felt like a god.
“I can’t… I can’t .” He struggled with his words, and when he realized he was mumbling, Satoru started laughing desperately. Suguru felt the vibrations of it, felt his laughter through his body, echoing through his bones, “I can’t anymore, mission achieved.”
Suguru sighed, pressed open-mouthed kisses against his cheek, the throbbing veins in his neck, the crook of his shoulder.
“Can I come now too?” He asked, gently moving his hips, feeling Satoru shuddering from overstimulation.
“Fuck, fuck. Yeah. Knot me, babe. Fill me up.”
Satoru’s body was so welcoming. He was so open for him and sighed and his eyelashes fluttered closed, and all thoughts in his head were replaced with this intense need to give and have and hold and cherish. He wanted to give Satoru anything and everything he could ever want or need. Everything that was in his power to give.
He couldn’t say anything, couldn’t think about anything else. Like his mind was ablaze with want and need and love. Suguru sunk his teeth into the flesh of Satoru’s shoulder. Satoru gasped, shuddered beneath him, and his body tightened, tightened around Suguru cock as he was coming inside him, his knot filling up and locking them together, and…
And...
He was unprepared for it, for the intense feeling of connection, the intimacy of it. He felt raw, scraped out and exposed, like Satoru was too much, like they both got broken apart and then had to put each other back together. Fuck, why was he feeling so fragile? Why couldn’t he stop shaking?
“Satoru.” He couldn’t trust himself with words because he was afraid of what he would say.
“Yeah, I know, I know, just hold me, okay? You can just hold me, it’s okay – “
He had never knotted anyone before Satoru. It was too intimate to do it with random hook-ups. You had to stay there, holding each other, still connected in a way that was deeper than anything else could prepare you for. The sheer feeling of it was frightening, how vulnerable the whole thing felt and how grateful he was to Satoru for letting him do it.
Suguru’s bed had an old, lumpy mattress and he had been meaning to get it changed for months. There was never really any incentive to do so, because he lived alone and there were always other things he could spend his money on. With Satoru in his bed, though, he really wished he would have done that before. A nice, comfy, baby-making bed, soft sheets and fluffy pillows.
Maybe it had something to do with his Alpha instincts being in overdrive as he could feel how Satoru’s scent mixed with his own, his bedroom where he never had anyone over starting to feel like a nest. Like a place they could wake up in together, where they could go to bed in the evenings, cuddle up together when it was cold and murky outside, make love on lazy Sunday mornings. They could have a bunch of kids that would want to sleep with their parents if they had nightmares.
Hunger was appeased by food, but he knew that no matter how much he allowed himself to feast on Satoru’s body, it never seemed to be enough – he wanted to taste him more and learn him through his taste-buds, sear himself into the other man’s body and leave a scar in the shape of his mouth where everyone could see it.
He kept his hand pressed against Satoru’s stomach as he spooned him, feeling how his walls fluttered around his knot whenever he moved. It sent sparks of pleasure through his spine, how snuggly he fit inside him, knowing that each time he did it, he was pumping Satoru full of his seed, that Satoru was his, that there was a chance –
“Can you imagine how cute our kids will be?” Satoru asked, pushing himself against Suguru’s knot, shuddering at the feeling of it. “I can’t wait to be pregnant with your kids, I keep thinking about it – ” He stopped himself mid-sentence, biting his lower lip and taking Suguru by the wrist, moving his hand from where it was sitting on his stomach to between his legs.
Suguru could feel it with his fingertips, how stretched out Satoru’s pussy was around his knot, how his body felt like it was molding around him. Logically he knew, he knew biology didn’t work like that, but there was the Big Dumb Alpha Brain that wanted it. He wanted Satoru’s body to be only his to claim, his to touch, his to have. He wanted Satoru to carry his babies, wanted to see how his belly got round and his breasts grew and he wanted to just take care of him –
“I wanna see you pregnant, I want - ” he bit Satoru’s shoulder and then licked the area, pressed kisses into the marks and bites and bruises he left there while they were fucking. His fingers moved over Satoru’s clit, feeling him tense around his knot.
Fucking Satoru was so fun, because he came quickly and he could just do it multiple times, without shying away from Suguru’s touch or finding it too much. Like his body was perfectly designed for pleasure, for Suguru to play with as much as he wanted to, to taste him and fuck him and love him and leave greedy little love marks all over him.
“Tell me I’m yours, tell me I’m yours, I wanna be yours - ”
“You’re mine, you’re mine, you’re mine -” he repeated, rocking into him now because every time Satoru clenched around his knot it felt like his soul was getting squeezed through his cock, like all he could do was obey Satoru’s needs, fill him up to the brim…
“Suguru, Suguru, Suguru, tell me you’re mine.”
“I’m yours, I’ve always been yours”
And he didn’t believe in fate or the stars or the universe, but if people were made for each other then he was made for Satoru and Satoru was made for him.
When Satoru came again, the contractions around him were so intense that it sent him over the edge again, his knot filling up so much that it was painful and Satoru was too tight, like he was too much, his muscles quivering from the intensity of it.
Satoru melted in his arms and against his chest, soft and sweet and pliant, sheets messy and wet beneath them, but God, it felt like an out of body experience, like floating above himself and then being pulled back down to Earth. Like Satoru was his one anchor point while he was drifting at sea.
“I can’t get up,” Satoru told him when he said they both needed to shower and get cleaned up. It would be too easy to fall into the trap of sleep, but Suguru felt they were both disgustingly sticky and his sheets were completely gross, so he needed to do the laundry.
“I’m not letting you laze around in my bed like that. Come on, the sooner we get you clean and the sheets changed, the sooner you can nap.”
“But my legs are still shaking, Alpha,” Satoru told him with all this fake sweetness written all over his face, eyelashes fluttering. “I can’t move on my own. You’ll have to carry me if you want to get me into the shower.”
He knew a challenge when he heard one, and normally he wasn’t the type to give into something so childish. However, in this case, there were special circumstances to be had and Suguru felt something he hadn’t in a long, long time – playful. Instead of arguing with Satoru, he walked over to his side of the bed, put an arm around his shoulders and the other beneath his knees, picked him up smoothly while Satoru laughed and held onto him.
“I wasn’t expecting that.”
“Yes, you were. You absolutely were. Did you think I wouldn’t be able to carry you?”
Suguru took him to the bathroom and set his feet down in the tub, climbed in with him and picked up the showerhead to wet his hair. Satoru kept holding on to him, melted against his chest when he started to shampoo his hair and scrub his back. There was a soft sigh of pleasure when warm water ran over his body.
It was so strange – Suguru had no idea what he was supposed to do with this soft, pliant lover who hummed in the shower while he helped him clean up.
“Turn around,” he told him, and Satoru pressed his hands against the tile, and turned to look at him over his shoulder.
“Like this?” Satoru’s lower back curved, and he smiled at him. Evil. A soul sucking succubus, yes, but a very charming one at that, and Suguru put his arm over his collarbone and pulled him in, pressed his chest against Satoru’s back and kissed his wet temple.
“Like that, yes.” Showerhead in one hand, he brought it in front of his groin and said, “Open your legs, please.” The hand over his collar went around, pressed against the back of his neck, dragged over his spine.
There was semen between his thighs, sticky. Dripping. He wanted to push it back inside him. Suguru put the showerhead over his labia. Ran a finger over the crack of his ass, went lower, dipped inside him again. Twisted them slowly.
“Suguru? What are you doing?” Satoru asked, biting his lip and thrusting, rocking against the showerhead on his clit and against the fingers in his pussy.
“Can you come like this?” Suguru kissed his reddening cheek.
“I don’t… I… hah. Probably?”
“Yeah, I think you can. Let’s try.”
“You’ll have to hold me up, though. I’m gonna fall on my fucking face if you make me come standing up, I’m - “ Suguru’s fingers were thrusting inside him, he was struggling to talk through the moans and gasp.
Suguru felt so powerful.
“It’s alright, I’ll hold you - trust me, trust me, Satoru, okay?”
“Yes, yes, yes, Suguru, yes .”
The word echoed around the walls of his bathroom, into his apartment, into his head. Yes, you can make me come again. Yes, you can fuck me. Yes, you can have me. Yes, yes, yes. Yes, I’ll have you, yes, I’ll keep you, I’ll give you whatever you want.
Satoru’s orgasms were lovely, fascinating things to observe. His eyelashes fluttered, his eyelids twitching. His skin glowed with the most beautiful flush, it made his eyes seem bluer, it spread over his neck and his chest, making his nipples stand out, dark pink and painfully hard. His pretty pussy contracted, clenching and relaxing around Suguru’s fingers as he pressed against his G-spot, pressing until he squirted, legs almost giving out if not for Suguru being there to prop him up.
There was such a fantastic surrender to it, like knowing without a doubt that Satoru trusted him, that Satoru was his and they belonged to each other, that even if they had no one else they had each other, to have and to hold.
Afterwards, he wrapped Satoru up in his big, fluffy bathrobe and rubbed his hair dry. Kissed his nose, his cheeks, his eyelids, the barely-there freckles over his cheekbones. Let Satoru brush his hair and braid it, because Suguru found it relaxing to feel his fingers combing through his hair, because Satoru was careful with him too, like he could barely believe Suguru was there.
They changed the sheets together, stupid little domestic moment that made his heart flip, because it was so easy to envision this sort of life, just the two of them and the baby they were trying to make.
It was really the only thing he could think about, as Satoru fell asleep with his head on Suguru’s chest. Suguru stayed up for a long time afterwards, held him close and allowed himself to get a little bit lost in this fantasy he had, the one where it was him and Satoru and their kids, the one fantasy where they got to grow old together.
It was a boring fantasy, really, as far as fantasies were concerned. He wanted to be a good parent, and a good spouse. He wanted to wake up in the morning to Satoru’s face, he wanted them to have breakfast together. He wanted a noisy house full of kids and a big family, because he never had that and he thought it would be nice.
He couldn’t possibly fall asleep after that, so he carefully got out of bed, tucked Satoru in under the covers and went to the kitchen. For lack of any other activity, he started making crepes and by the time Satoru woke up 3 hours later, Geto Suguru was a master at flipping because he had made 84 crepes and smoked a whole packet of cigarettes that Shoko left at his place the last time she was there.
Satoru rolled himself 3 crepes at once and started eating, walked over to where Suguru was sitting and put his head on his shoulder as he chewed.
“Are you alright, babe? Not that I want to question your Alphaness or anything, buuuuut - ” he motioned towards the state of the kitchen, full of pots and pans and flour, “ – It looks like you’re going through something.”
“No, I’m fine, I’m - ”
He took a deep breath as Satoru went to the kitchen island and got himself more crepes. He was wearing one of Suguru’s shirts and Suguru’s boxers, and there were love bites littered all over his legs. It was cute and it only served to make him even more anxious.
“Do you want to get married?” he blurted out, and then he put a hand over his mouth because he wasn’t sure what came over him to just say that, with no preparation whatsoever and just –
“Sure,” Satoru said, while spreading jam on his thin pancakes, rolling them up, “Is that why you were so nervous?”
“I’m not – I mean – that’s it? Just. Sure?”
“Weren’t you actively trying to get me pregnant literally this morning? Marriage is far less of a commitment than having a baby.” Satoru shrugged, went back to sit next to Suguru and offered him a bite of his treat. “I don’t particularly care about it, though, but if Suguru wants to get married, then I want to get married too.” He said with a smile.
“Just like that?”
Satoru grinned at him and nodded, bumping his head against Suguru’s chin playfully before taking his hand. His fingers were overly warm and slightly greasy from the pancakes.
“Just like that. Did you think I’d say no?”
“I didn’t - ” he sighed, suddenly feeling lightheaded and tongue-tied, despite how dumb it was to be like that. “I don’t know. I didn’t think it would be that easy. I can’t believe you just said yes like that.”
“Did you check what sort of papers we need to get married? It shouldn’t take us more than a week to get everything ready, so we can go get married by the end of the month.”
“The end of the month? Really?” he really couldn’t believe they were having this conversation so casually, but at the end of the day, Satoru was right. They both decided they wanted a baby and wanted to spend their lives together, stressing over marriage seemed small in comparison to that.
“I mean. We’d invite Shoko and Utahime, and Nanami would probably come too. Do you have anyone else you want to invite?”
Suguru thought about it for a moment, thinking of all the acquaintances he had and whether he felt particularly attached to any of them. He supposed it would be a good idea to invite his aunt and her family, but other than that, he didn’t interact with that many people on a regular basis.
“Maybe my aunt, if she wants to. I haven’t spoken to her in a while.” Last time he talked to her, his aunt had been pregnant with twins. Maybe they could all come over. If he had children, he would like them to make friends with the hypothetical cousins he only heard about over the phone.
“See, it’s not like we need to do much planning. We can just get married quickly. It’ll be fun, like eloping.” Satoru laughed.
“Don’t you want a big wedding?” He always imagined that Satoru would be the kind to go all out on an event like a wedding. The idea wasn’t necessarily appealing to him, but then again -
“You know, if my folks were still alive - '' Satoru ran a hand through this hair before sighing. He put his arms around Suguru’s middle and tucked himself under his chin, making himself smaller than his ludicrous six-feet-seven. It was always fascinating to Suguru how Satoru could fold in on himself sometimes and still feel larger than life. Larger than Suguru’s life, at least. “If my folks were still alive, maybe I would have.” Satoru shrugged. “As it is – I think we can just go for it.”
What do you even do with yourself, when the thing you always dreamed about is finally within your reach? His chest felt huge and his stomach full of butterflies, like there was a galaxy swirling within and his stardust was flowing through his veins.
Suguru pressed an open-mouthed kiss on his cheek, a noisy smooch that made Satoru laugh. Another on his jaw, the side of his throat, behind his ear. Each kiss was a different thing he wanted to say, I love you, I need you, I don’t remember ever feeling this happy before.