Work Text:
1. the poison enters into everything
29th of December, 2020
5th Season
The Moon and its army of stars chased the Sun down into the horizon.
Team Hundred Blossoms, holed up in their practice room, paid it no heed.
What was a sunset? Just some reds and yellows in the sky. There would be plenty of those to appreciate, but they’d do that with the championship trophy in their hands.
With their curtains drawn tight, no light streamed into the room anyway; The only light there was shone from the computer monitors.
Day never washed into night here, and the only measure of time was the next round, the next combo, the next hit. The clacking of keys was sometimes a cacophony, sometimes a chorus. The only other sound –
“Cleric to the left!”
“Conserve your stamina!”
“Cover me!”
“Pay attention!”
Zhang Jiale’s voice rang out every few seconds, everyone else grunting in response.
The endless burst of fireworks from their monitors lit up the room. Though they sat still for hours, their shadows still performed a silent concert on the wall as the light shifted or faded with the exploding blossoms on screen.
In the real world, night fell. In here, time stood still.
Only in one corner of the room, time streamed in through a crack in the curtains.
Sun Zheping stared out at the reddening sky, watching it melt into gold, orange, pink. Then the Sun in the horizon blinded him for a good while until it slid below this part of the Earth, taking all the colours with it.
Now the Moon reigned, and Sun Zheping’s eyes grew tired.
The monitor in front of him was darkened, his headphones hanging around his neck.
Their practice was supposed to end soon.
He looked over at his team, all too absorbed in training to know or care.
“We end in five minutes,” he said.
A beat. No response.
Oh, right. They couldn’t hear him, with the sounds of Glory blasting through their headphones.
“We end in five minutes,” Zhang Jiale reminded the team.
Sun Zheping turned the monitor back on.
Blossoming Chaos stood where he’d left him. The expressionless, motionless avatar still managed to give off a distinctly listless feeling, as if itching to join the rest of his team in battle and get some blood on his sword.
You and me both , Sun Zheping thought.
Half an hour later, the sounds of keyboards clacking finally die off.
Team Hundred Blossoms used to be pretty good at ending practice in time, but Zhang Jiale is no Sun Zheping.
“Oh, Da Sun, you’re still here!”
Zhang Jiale threw himself down into the seat next to him.
“What the fuck, when did it become night time?”
“Thirty minutes ago, which is when we were supposed to end the practice.”
Rolled eyes. A deep sigh.
“Well I wanted to end it too, but we were so close to getting a perfect run! Do you even know how many times we practised the new strategy?”
He laughed.
Of course he did – he’d seen them, one trying to coordinate with the berserker that wouldn’t appear, one going way too fast so the sub player taking over his spot was forced to severely increase his APM. At one moment, even Dazzling Hundred Blossoms wildly shot around at the training NPCs, not at all focused on damage, forgetting Blossoming Chaos wouldn’t charge in under his cover.
“You’ll get there. You did well today.”
Zhang Jiale hummed and nodded.
Leaning back in his chair, his jacket covering his face, his arms hanging limply by his sides, he looked almost asleep. But Sun Zheping knew better – Look at his fingers, clenched into a fist, or his eyebrows, still knitted into a frown.
Look at him, too busy chewing on the end of his ponytail to respond. He probably hadn’t even heard a word Sun Zheping said. With all the pressure weighing down on him those days, Zhang Jiale had gotten into the unfortunate habit of brooding.
“Just keep practising. You’ll get used to it before the playoffs,” Sun Zheping told him.
Zhang Jiale’s chair spun so hard that their knees smashed into each other, spinning Sun Zheping 180 degrees too.
“We don’t have to get used to anything!”
Huh?
“It’s just for a few rounds, so, so, we don’t have to get it perfect, we don’t have to get used to it. It’s just a temporary measure, then you’ll be back and we can get back to normal! What do we have to get used to? Don’t talk nonsense! Shut up!”
Oh.
Zhang Jiale blinked furiously, then ducked his head.
“Sorry, Jiale. You know what I mean,” Sun Zheping said.
He nodded. Hummed. His head hung low, his fingers fidgeting with the arms of the chair. His body trembled, still wary.
Sun Zheping reached out, wanting to hold him.
A shake of the head. Zhang Jiale drew further into himself, drawing his knees up to his chest.
They fell into silence.
The room had long emptied out, the members murmuring, laughing, massaging their hands, as they finally escaped the practice room.
‘Ding!’
FROM: ONE AUTUMN LEAF
Pro Players Chat
2020/12/29 6:17 PM
I have generously offered to treat Tiny Herb to a meal
If they win our upcoming match
Big-eyed Wang is making me announce it here.
So I can’t “back out” “when” we “lose”.
FROM: TROUBLING RAIN
Pro Players Chat
2020/12/29 6:18 PM
Old Ye must be really confident this time! Wang Jiexi you'd better watch out don't you know he’s dirty-hearted? Don’t you don’t you!
He must have some trick up his sleeve because we all know he can barely afford one meal!
FROM: TROUBLING RAIN
Pro Players Chat
2020/12/29 6:20 PM
@Blossoming Chaos What do we get if we win our upcoming match!
Come on let’s make bets! Are you scared, are you scared?
Oh wait I should actually be calling @Dazzling Hundred Blossoms What will you treat us to??
A scoff.
Zhang Jiale’s face scrunched with annoyance before he leapt across Sun Zheping’s lap, snatched his phone and began to type.
TO: Pro Players Chat
2020/12/29 6:21 PM
Fuck!! Who wants to feed you?
Wait till we sweep you.
You’ll go crying back to Guangzhou!!
Zhang Jiale lets Sun Zheping take the phone back from him, looking decidedly more cheerful once he’d taken his frustration out on innocent bystander Huang Shaotian.
FROM: VACCARIA
Pro Players Chat
2020/12/29 6:21 PM
Those messages were definitely not from Captain Sun
:laughing:
FROM: AWETO GUARD
Pro Players Chat
2020/12/29 6:21 PM
The real @Blossoming Chaos please come out of hiding and collect Zhang Jiale
Unless the rumours are true and you are secretly dead and Hundred Blossoms is just waiting till the end of the season to announce it.
Then my condolences!
Sun Zheping watched the messages shooting up the screen (the average hand speed of that group chat is no joke) until his eyes blur.
The truth is, he had no desire to reply to their messages. They might as well have been speaking to a fish in a tank; He did not feel at all like he inhabited the same space as them at that moment.
Before his break, he could still pretend –
His hand had been hurting like hell. The pain would shoot up his arm in the middle of a round, making him gasp in pain. He’d grit back tears, forcing himself to swallow the pain. When did this all become so hard?
But after every match he could still hold his head high. He’d shake his opponents’ hands, and start a round of trash talk with the others, then hide his reddening hand from Zhang Jiale’s sharp eyes.
Now there was no hiding.
His hand was beyond saving. He’d pushed it too far, he’d been too eager to win, or too unwilling to back off. Both he and Jiale had been too greedy. They’d win this time, they had decided, and no one could tell them to change their minds, be it hell or broken fingers.
Now it was impossible to ignore the elephant in the room.
It permeated every conversation like a bitter aftertaste; His absence, his injury.
Where are you? When will you return?
With Jiale, it was even worse. There was an ugly fear hanging between them.
What if you can’t return?
Except Sun Zheping was not scared. He knew already.
They did not talk about this inevitability.
Every time it was brought up, Zhang Jiale’s face practically crumbled, eyes shining with tears. He was so afraid, and Sun Zheping could not protect nor reassure him.
He ached. He was so lonely.
There was no exact point of loss.
One day his hand ached a little. One day, his hand ached forever.
One day he led his team and charged through the regular season, stronger than they had ever been. One day he took a break.
What wouldn’t he give to return to that golden world and conquer it all over again?
What wouldn’t he give to return himself to Zhang Jiale whole and say, hey, let’s try again?
But there was nothing left he could give. He’d given it all, and now all he could do was back off.
Slowly. Slowly.
He looked at Zhang Jiale, his hair out of its ponytail, falling loosely around his shoulders. He played some puzzle game on his phone, tongue poking out of his mouth in his deep concentration. His eyelids were a little droopy, sleepy from the tiring day.
Sun Zheping would never want to back off.
Zhang Jiale’s head rested on his shoulder, his breathing evening out. He looked so peaceful, drifting off into sleep like this.
It would be time to leave, soon.
Slowly, slowly.
2. (you were my ground, my safe and sound)
You build a home with a boy.
TO: DA SUN
2019/08/17 00:01 AM
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!
Wanna hang out?
I’ll meet you in the game!
FROM: DA SUN
2019/08/17 00:21 AM
Thanks i’m eating cake
Nah i’m giving my hand a break today
Gotta gear up for next season
TO: DA SUN
2019/08/17 00:21 AM
Damn, is it still hurting?
Okay I’ll leave you alone then!
Wanna call?
FROM: DA SUN
2019/08/17 0:21 AM
Sure
11th of June, 2022
7th Season Finals
Zhang Jiale is exhausted.
Perhaps it’s from the long, drawn out match, pushing his fingers past breaking point, making him think so much his brain is still struggling to find its bearings – or maybe it’s just that bone-deep exhaustion that has sewn itself onto him like a shadow.
He shakes hands with a smiling Wang Jiexi, then each Tiny Herb member, accepting their sportsmanly platitudes, thanking them for their encouragement. He responds easily to their trash talk, responds to the host’s questions with a practised confidence.
Two-time champions! Tiny Herb, having charged righteously into battle with their steady anchor and unshakeable captain Wang Jiexi, had emerged victorious yet again.
This was a team that could never let down their fans – win, lose, or draw, they’d always have Wang Jiexi: Their lighthouse, their anchor, standing strong as the gods of glory rose and fell around him, some even at his hand.
The screaming audience of Tiny Herb’s home stadium is louder than a tsunami crashing onto the shore, blowing Hundred Blossoms back with the force of their passion, knocking them off their feet and washing them somewhere insignificant.
Who is going to harbour them?
Zhang Jiale is so tired.
Schooling his expression into something more polite, and swallowing his bitter exhaustion, he leads his team off the stage.
TO: DA SUN
2020/01/13 05:34 AM
[Attached a video]
Look at this hilarious moment from my last arena fight.
FROM: DA SUN
2020/01/13 06:13 AM
Ur flashy moves look so stupid without the excuse of covering me
TO: DA SUN
2020/01/13 06:21 AM
Fuck you!!
That’s why you should hurry up and recover!
How’s your hand?
FROM: DA SUN
2020/01/13 06:23 AM
Still hurts.
Dont worry, ill be okay
You built a home with a boy.
He leaves it on your back and never looks back.
17th of August, 2022
After 7th Season
Zhang Jiale wants to turn back.
He nearly changed his mind the other day; He’d been sorting match videos into folders for the next captain, whoever that may be. It took a lot longer than expected, his brain carried away by reminiscence.
Look at how he dazzles the audience! Look at how bright his team shines!
They’d made it so far, so many times – wouldn’t it be stupid to quit now?
He nearly changed his mind two days ago, when he received a call from his boss, offering more benefits, higher pay – He didn’t need all those things, but it was another reminder of how much the team needed him.
This was the team he’d built from the ground up.
He’d been there on the day of its conception, screamed at his parents for weeks and stubbornly insisted that yes, he was going to die on this ESports hill, begged them to understand please, and yes this random boy he met on the internet is indeed someone to be trusted!
Never had he wanted to step down, not when the logistics were becoming overwhelming, not when they had to scramble and scrounge to qualify as a brand new team. Not when they lost, not when they struggled.
Does he dare to leave?
Can he bear to?
After making it this far, why would he want to run away?
–
THE NO. 1 UNLUCKY GOD??
Why Zhang Jiale is unable to win a championship:
Expert Commentary Inside!
–
That copy of Esports Weekly had become a houseguest in his room, hanging out on the corner of his table.
This isn’t the first article trying to analyse his inability to make it victoriously through the final lap of every year’s competition.
Everything from Esports Home to tabloids to online forums had written pages upon pages of analysis, citing all sorts of reasons: Maybe he doesn’t have enough stamina, getting tired before that last lap. Maybe he doesn’t gel well enough with his team. Maybe it’s just Wang Jiexi and Ye Qiu he can’t defeat.
Or maybe, speculated Esports Weekly, maybe he was better off as a Vice-Captain.
Perhaps if the old Captain was still around…
Thus it has earned its place on his table, where it now acts as both a coaster and an aching reminder.
Today it has been evicted, and acts as a makeshift tray on his lap while he eats cake on the couch of the waiting room.
“Xiao Zhang, are you ready?”
The manager has gradually grown to resemble a walking corpse ever since Zhang Jiale told him about his decision. Now, even as he tries to smile encouragingly at him, it looks more like a grimace, stretched upon the pale lips of a man at his wit’s end.
They can both hear the unspoken plea for him to stay.
The hallways look so narrow. They’re waiting to choke him backwards, waiting to swallow his words and then climb onto his back so he can carry them like he’s been carrying everything else.
Zhang Jiale nods.
“Then I’ll see you out there,” says the manager. He exits first, shutting the door behind him.
It has a sense of finality to it.
That door has closed, there’s no need to peek behind it to see what might’ve been or inspect what’s falling apart. No need to crack a window to see what will happen from now on, no need to stand at the door and hold it open for anyone else who needs to walk through – he’s got places to be, and he is not going to stand here forever.
Just close the door behind you and move on.
There’s no turning back.
“Happy Birthday,” he mutters.
Leaving the rest of the cake on the copy of Esports Weekly, he closes the door behind him.
FROM: DA SUN
2020/02/28 02:42 AM
are u busy
TO: DA SUN
2020/02/28 02:42 AM
A bit!
What’s up?
How’s your hand?
FROM: DA SUN
2020/02/28 02:43 AM
I need to talk to you
call me
---
FROM: DA SUN
2020/02/28 06:21 AM
I’m really sorry.
YOU CAN NO LONGER SEND MESSAGES TO THIS PERSON.
You built a home with a boy.
He left it on your back and never looked back.
Who will take it from you now that you want to run away too?
8th Season
“ You’re still not going to give up?” Zhang Jiale asked.
“Why do I have to give up?” Ye Qiu asked in reply.
Isn’t he tired?
Zhang Jiale remembers the Ye Qiu of years ago, that impossible, untouchable height.
He’d been at the peak of glory, eight years ago now. He’d demolished the competition, been adorned with titles and medals and barely breaking a sweat as he climbed again and again to the throne. That faceless silhouette had outshone them all, and Zhang Jiale, like everyone else, had been in awe.
Back then, he had a steady partner by his side: Wu Xuefeng, Qi Breaker, his best partner and vice-captain. Together they suppressed all the other rising gods. One in the spotlight, one in the shadows, both working perfectly in tandem, eating up opponents and spitting out championships.
What splendid partnership, what perfect teamwork!
That duo had been the first to stop Team Hundred Blossoms, back in their debut year.
It was Ye Qiu, yes, but it was Ye Qiu with someone who could coordinate with him perfectly, strengthening and protecting him while walking away with none of the praise or acclaim.
When Wu Xuefeng retired, so too did that excellent era come to an end.
Now Ye Qiu has nothing, not a team nor a partner.
Why won’t he just give up? Isn’t he tired?
Zhang Jiale knows he’s tired.
Things were easier before. He’d had the whole world to look forward to back then.
Back then, he’d been so young. Brimming with potential, and leagues above the rest of the world, arrogant and smart.
“Your skill is pretty good. Wanna partner up?”
Take a big fish out of the small pond, put him in an ocean to give him a challenge. He meets another fish, who shows him that they’re actually sharks.
It was easy – terrifying, intense, exhausting.
But he made it easy.
And each training, every match, he was by Zhang Jiale’s side, his laughter like thunder.
Every challenge, every unexpected problem that would knock Zhang Jiale off his feet, he was still by his side, steadying him, fortifying him.
But the waves came in, and washed the second shark away.
Faced with the absence of his dependable partner, left with a team slowly growing more and more reliant on him, he had tried his best to stay standing.
The ocean grew bigger.
Nothing was easy.
He had to keep going.
Doggedly, bitterly, he pressed on.
The next match, the next fight, the next playoffs, just keep going. One more. One more.
One more
No more – he couldn’t take it.
An entire year of fighting; He put off sleep. He trained till his eyes hurt and his hands cramped all the way up to the shoulder. Chug an energy drink after practice, and head off to analyse some opponents till he passed out in front of the monitor. Start again. Next round. Next round!
He charged to the end, thinking: This is the one!
This time, this time, this time he would lead his team to the win.
Not this time.
Not that last time either.
He stood at the player booth, face burning red, mind blank. At glacial pace, he packs his things.
The mouse is picked up, wrapped with the cord, and the keyboard sealed back into its cover, then back into the bag.
Once he walked out, he’d have to face his team – What expressions would they wear on their weary faces? What would he say to them that could make up for this loss?
He clenched his fists so hard his nails stab into his palms. Steeled himself. If the Captain himself was faltering now, the rest of his team might as well throw their faces away and retire.
It was just a loss. We made it this far! We will learn from our mistakes. We will try again.
No more –
No more, he couldn’t take another disappointment, couldn’t stand up again at the end of another match, swallowing his own bitter disappointment, comforting his miserable team, thickening his face enough to hold his head up high, standing at that wretched second place spot, the trophy just a breath away.
No more articles, no more anticipation, no more loss.
“As long as there’s a chance, I will never back out, even if it’s just for one more day.”
Ye Qiu, addicted to the championship, comes back for more.
Yes, there’s a chance, there’s always a chance. That’s the thrill of the fight!
But he’s long lost that excitement, trading it in for fear.
Maybe he isn’t tired. Maybe he’s just a coward.
Maybe he’s afraid to hope again, afraid to lose again and wonder why he thought he could do it this time?
They are professional players. Who hasn’t tasted bitter loss?
Who has tasted it as often as he has?
How many more times?
Just one would’ve satisfied him; Just one win, one to say he’d done it, just one to say he’d done enough and he could rest now –
Even Ye Qiu hasn’t stopped, after eight years, after three trophies.
Does he really want to rest?
Doesn’t he just hate to lose? Maybe he really is just a coward, hiding behind the excuse of exhaustion, when in reality he is just running away from the team he ran into the ground.
Maybe it’s time to be brave.
Zhang Jiale’s getting a headache.
He’s been wearing these headphones for hours, completely lost in the game, trying his hardest to win victory for the team he’d abandoned. (Or perhaps, he realises now, to win forgiveness for the betrayal he had yet to commit.)
A soft thump sounds as they fall around his neck instead.
The click of keys, the bloop of QQ notifications, the thrumming sound of the glory software shutting down for the night, the ‘ding’ of his email inbox opening.
—
Han Wenqing <[email protected]>
to me▼
—
Tomorrow will be a new day.
Tonight, he will rest.
FROM: DA SUN
2018/03/16 8:17 PM
Are you okay?
TO: DA SUN
2018/03/16 8:41 PM
I’ll be fine :(
Just mourning my inability to shove the trophy into my relatives’ faces and say “suck it”.
FROM: DA SUN
2018/03/16 8:41 PM
Just do it anyway with the silver medal, coward
I know we will beat that guy next time ok
We can do it
TO: DA SUN
2018/03/16 8:42 PM
Lead us on, fearless captain! >:)
You let the house fall off your back. You leave it in shambles.
Someone else can live in it now.
3. (only one of us was real and that was me)
He burst into the middle of a chaotic battlefield –
Blood everywhere. Bodies piled up. Strangers slashing against strangers, friends standing back to back, fending off unfamiliar foes.
He’s not entirely sure what’s happening, or what caused this fighting in the first place.
It doesn’t matter.
Identify his comrades. Lend them his strength.
It’s easy enough to do even amidst the chaos.
While he fights, the chaos finds its rhythm.
He finds him too.
There. Wait no, here! No, wait –
His friends curse, scream: He sees them enveloped in a burst of fireworks. Their corpses drop lifelessly before the fireworks end.
That ID bops around his screen, disappearing for ages then re-emerging here, there –
Something, something, blossoms.
Who was that?
Without a second of hesitation he heads for him.
A blossom here, a blossom there, one running, one chasing. Both mowing down the other players like common enemies, only seeing each other.
Flashes of colour, spatters of blood.
He knows this scene.
He has long stood alone in this scene, the only finished part of this blank canvas.
But it’s started up again, the painting is coming again to life, and this time he is not alone.
A breath away from victory, he stays his sword.
The other blossom looks up, bloody in defeat.
He asked him to be his partner.
He did not say yes.
He never had to – he was by his side as soon as he wished it.
From that moment on, he had Zhang Jiale.
The dream had started with Glory.
Of course, the dream didn’t exist then.
It was just a game, a few hours of being the best at something, of feeling like something made sense. Just a few hours of adrenaline.
So the dream had started with that little internet cafe that he escaped to for a few hours of fun to escape studies and nagging parents.
Of course, none of his comrades there was good enough to inspire him.
So the dream had started with the Glory Pro Alliance.
Of course, he wasn’t convinced back then.
Just being a good player wouldn’t a champion make. It was about more than that – if one person alone could win, why would they bother to make teams in the first place?
He dreamt, but not of this. None of these teams were his, so he refused, and he waited.
So the dream had started with Ye Qiu.
Of course, he just made him dream harder.
Ye Qiu was definitely part of the dream, but he always stood opposite him, both giving it their all, spear against greatsword, everyones’ eyes on them. The scene was still incomplete.
So, the dream started with Zhang Jiale.
Of course.
FROM: ZHANG JIALE
2016/07/16 10:12 PM
Hello! >:)
This is Sun Zheping right?
TO: ZHANG JIALE
2016/07/16 10:47PM
Hey
Yep its me
You ready to get this thing started
FROM: ZHANG JIALE
2016/07/16 10:48 PM
Yes I am!!!
So. How do we get this thing started?
TO: ZHANG JIALE
2016/07/16 10:47PM
…
No idea actually
The dream began there, and it was the best sleep he ever had.
After months of struggle, they went on stage.
They burst into life on that competition stage, and no one could look away.
The “dual-core” era, everyone called it. Two Gods on a team, equally important, equally dazzling, taking the world by storm. They blasted through the competition, guns blazing, sword swinging, defeating opponent after opponent, the talk of the season.
Wake a dragon from his nap, and throw him into battle. He meets another dragon, and they combine their fire.
Season Three. They made it all the way this time, and his face was like the sun.
They lost with all the stubborn dignity of babies learning to walk, then they left for the holidays. They would come back next season.
It wasn’t easy, but he made it easy.
And each training, every match, he was right by his side, his laughter light as a drizzle.
Zhang Jiale was energetic like Sun Zheping, powerful too.
He was angrier than Sun Zheping though, blowing up at things that would never irk him. And he was more cautious too, scared of things that would never rattle Sun Zheping. In him Sun Zheping met his match – He’d scold him in his heartlessness, hold him back in his recklessness.
But if he dreamt too big, then Zhang Jiale would start running up to that unimaginable Everest, and say he’d meet him there.
What was one loss? He could've torn through the competition any number of times with him by his side.
So Season Five: Here they went again.
It went even better this time. Those little rookies of the so-called Golden Generation, who were they compared to the Blossom Duo?
This was what it meant to be at the top.
His hand hurt for a second. He put it aside, stayed focused on the game.
There was no turning back now.
27th December, 2021
7th Season
A burst of pain blossoms in his hand.
Put it aside for now, he can go a bit longer.
“Let’s finish up quickly, guys! The match is starting soon,” He hears from someone nearby.
Pay them no attention, he mostly ignored the Glory professional sphere anyway. Why stay so close to something he can never have again?
The pain flares up again, and he loses his breath.
Damn. Overdid it again.
It’s only been five hours, but his hand aches like someone ran over it with a car.
Another Summer of Sleep pauses on the screen.
Looks like this is all the exercise the Berserker is going to get for the day, though the boss battle rages on and all these hurried noobs would be far too easy to kill-steal from.
Just a few moments more would be okay…
One more hit, one more fight…
Once more, getting close…
His hand aches.
Okay then.
The sigh builds and dies in his chest.
Another Summer of Sleep is tucked back into the drawer.
17th of August, 2022
After 7th Season
Retired.
Zhang Jiale has surprised him once again.
He’d always been strong, so strong. He’d get hit, get hit again, even get angry, but go again, hit them back, never give up, just go again.
But he sees him in the picture on the article, and he looks so small.
The articles call him crazy, heartless, they accuse him of abandoning his team. Some even call him ungrateful.
The game explodes that night.
The air is full of confusion and a desperate kind of sadness. Like if they’re sad enough, mourned wretchedly enough, begged miserably enough, maybe the situation will magically end. Sun Zheping has felt that kind of wretchedness before, but he feels no pity.
What do these people understand?
They don’t know how long he’s been carrying this, and how much he deserves to rest.
Betrayal? What betrayal?
Zhang Jiale has been giving all of himself to Hundred Blossoms; He can’t blame him for finally running dry.
He knows this too well, understands it, and he can forgive him for it.
Years ago, Sun Zheping left him, ran away and left him to carry both his dream and his own. Now he’s done too. Sun Zheping’s dreams –
Never mind them. Let him rest.
A breath away from victory, he stays his sword.
The other blossom looks up, bloody in defeat.
He asked him to be his partner.
He shoots him in the head.
The scene –
It’s blank now.
No enemy, no partner.
There used to be him, at least.
He wakes, wide eyed, fists clenched, alone.
January 3rd 2024
9th Season
This is a feeling he hasn’t had in a while.
What is this?
Someone that can beat him down, someone that has his blood pumping and breath quickening. His mind whirs, trying to predict the next position, the next move. His heart is beating so loud he can hear it in his ears.
Sword against sword. The clanging of metal. Dodge this, counter that!
Such competitive play!
Loulan Slash – Lou Guanning, he’s this good?
He might actually lose this round!
That would be something.
His fingers fly across the keyboard, click-clacking with an intensity that shocks even himself.
His thoughts are going at the speed of light: calculations, predictions. How long has it been since he’s done all of this, and at such breakneck speed?
Ye Qiu. Of course it is –
Ye Qiu, nigh insurmountable God;
Ye Qiu, still smiling, unbeaten, standing opposite him in his dreamt scene;
Years ago, Ye Qiu tested and broke the limits of Glory, opening his eyes to a world he never could have imagined. With him as a guide, Sun Zheping charged forward, knowing exactly who he wanted to surpass.
He never did – That championship stayed stubbornly in Ye Qiu’s hands, never anyone else’s for the taking.
Before he could try again, his dream had wilted away into the old blurry scene, his partner out of reach, his opponent too mighty to notice him.
But his old enemy is here now.
And like before, he’s here to show him something new.
“Why not join our Team Happy?”
4. I do not care who takes this bloody hill
9th Season
The figures on screen disappear, enveloped into a burst of blossoms.
Back to back with a berserker, guns ablazing, numerous people falling to their combined might. How long has it been?
There is blood all over the floor.
Zhang Jiale’s heart catches in his throat.
Blood, blossoms.
With no practice, no communication, he coordinated with Yu Feng and recreated this nostalgic scene.
Blood, blossoms. Nothing came as easy to him as this. Nothing before, and nothing since.
“Zhang Jiale!! Why did you leave?!!”
If he could have continued like this, wouldn’t he have? Wouldn’t he have just stayed like this forever?
But Sun Zheping is not by his side, and he is more than Blood and Blossoms, and this is not his life anymore.
“Regardless, what’s past is past!”
Yes, what’s past is past.
Let those perfect days rest, let the dreams be for sleeping. Zhang Jiale will not throw away everything he worked so hard for just for the memories of a bygone era.
He looks at the crowd of Blossom Valley players.
Look at them, look how they loathe and love him. How could he not love them too?
“We’re enemies now!” He declares.
Stop weeping, stop clinging. Please let me go.
They would do it; In the end, with no rationality nor fear, they charged at him.
Let him go, that’s exactly what they were doing. Dazzling Spring lifts his gun too, but Zhang Jiale’s hand stills on the keyboard, trembles above the buttons.
Could he let them go? Could he let this go?
Hundred Blossoms had for too long been his only home. It was a sad home, barely staying put together on his trembling back, but they didn’t have to stay for as long as they did or cheer him on as lovingly.
Of course they wouldn’t want to let him go. Of course he wouldn’t want to leave.
Who was more unwilling, he or they?
His eardrums explode with sound.
Cut off screams. The slamming of bodies on the ground. The sound of a blade slashing through the crowd, uninterrupted.
Wild Blood Strike, Whirlwind Strike, Absolute Storm.
The crowd of players coming at Zhang Jiale instantly clears away.
His vision is blocked by a broad figure. The greatsword by his side is completely soaked in blood, dripping onto the ground where he stood.
ID: Another Summer of Sleep.
“What are you afraid of?”
Zhang Jiale is afraid of everything. Doesn’t he know?
“Who are you?” He asks, afraid to be wrong.
“If you’ve already decided to say goodbye to the past, why is there still a thread of weakness remaining in your heart?”
Sun Zheping.
That presence is here again, to form a steel cage around his heart and fortify him.
“Get rid of all those distracting thoughts!”
Zhang Jiale actually smiled, and his face hurt from it.
Sun Zheping!
He steps back into Zhang Jiale’s life like the last four years had been an unfortunate nightmare. He swoops in right when Zhang Jiale is most doubtful, and makes him forget his fears again. Here he is, acting like a figure out of Zhang Jiale’s brightest daydreams: Inviting him, as before, to fight with him side by side.
“You’re still so crazy!”
There was no doubt now. Zhang Jiale feels as light as a cloud, and his heart tough as a rock, his mind clearer than anything.
“Right now, the person who needs to go crazy isn’t me, but you.”
For the first time in four years, Zhang Jiale doesn’t swallow his memories before they can pull him under. He lets them take him.
His old love is here, and he’s calling for him.
“I’m here!”
So they tear through the crowd together, and Zhang Jiale lets the old memories flood in.
Blood, blossoms, and the crowd falling at their feet.
Every shot perfectly matched with a slash, every thought understood and echoed, beat for beat, breath for breath.
Look at what a perfect picture they paint!
Once, Sun Zheping had been the only thing that made sense to him. Once, they fit together like puzzle pieces.
Today, they still fit together like nothing else, like the rest of the world is a question and they are the only answer –
But they are not.
Zhang Jiale has survived for years without this steady soulmate of his, and he has found another answer.
No more locking himself up in the past. Maybe Sun Zheping was perfect for him once, and in a kinder world that would never have changed. But it has, and he survived it well.
He doesn’t want to paint this dated picture anymore.
Zhang Jiale’s heart aches.
So let it ache!
Let those perfect days rest, let the dreams be for sleeping.
Let the new days be sad, or bittersweet, or free.
Sun Zheping and Zhang Jiale are here, and they exist, and they charge into the future together, carving out an empty place so they could part ways in peace.
5. Treaty
10th Season
Lou Guanning has become a lot more professional since joining the league a year ago, so he doesn’t fawn too much when two of the four Gods of Tyranny come to visit their waiting room.
But there’s still a distinct air of awkwardness.
Zhang Xinjie greets them politely, and shakes their hands. He gives them a few encouraging words and recommends places to eat in the area.
Zhang Jiale leans against the door, gnawing agitatedly at his lips. He responds to their greetings with a distracted nod.
“Sun Zheping!” He suddenly calls out, no longer able to keep pretending to care for these niceties. If Wen Kebei is annoyed at being interrupted, he doesn’t show it. All their eyes turn to the other old God in the room.
Sun Zheping looks up at him.
“Let’s go get water!” Zhang Jiale shouts again in the same tone.
Wordlessly, he follows Zhang Jiale through the private hallway, past Tyranny’s prep room, to the water cooler. After a year this former Hundred Blossoms captain seems to have grown used to Tyranny’s home stadium, easily navigating the place.
Zhang Jiale reaches a hand out, asking for Sun Zheping’s bottle. He hands it over.
Their hands brush. Neither of them says a word. They stand in silence while Zhang Jiale fills up the bottles slowly.
“You look good in the Tyranny jacket.”
He really does, the red compliments him even better than the pink used to.
“Well, you look stupid in the Heavenly Swords jacket.”
Sun Zheping laughs.
“Why’d you decide to join them anyway?” Zhang Jiale hands his bottle back to him and starts filling up his own.
It’s a short story, and he tells it simply, finishing within the time it took to fill up the second bottle.
Zhang Jiale hums, nods. “I’ve seen your matches. Your skills are still holding up.”
Sun Zheping smiles. He’s pretty proud of that – He’s not a God anymore. But it’d be a long time before his pride would let him be defeated so easily.
He takes a sip of the water.
Zhang Jiale clears his throat. “So… What’s it like, to see everyone again?”
Sun Zheping shrugs.
“What do you mean ‘again’? So many new faces. But I’ve met the other fossils, if that’s what you mean.”
This breaks a laugh out of Zhang Jiale.
“Are you feeling better these days? How’s your hand?”
Sun Zheping shows him his bandages as a response.
Zhang Jiale hums again. He starts walking away from the water coolers, and Sun Zheping follows him. When a hand is held out to him, thoughtlessly, he takes it.
A scoff, a quick smile. Zhang Jiale seems pleasantly surprised.
He takes him, not back to the prep room, but to the roof.
They sit together there, staring out at the city.
No one can find them here, so they sit in silence, both lost in thought.
“Zheping.”
Sun Zheping looks up when he’s called.
“I’m sorry.”
“What for?”
“I wasn’t good to you. Before. I was stressed, and scared, and terrified you were gonna leave so I just… acted like the problem didn’t exist.”
Zhang Jiale sways to the side a little, like he wants to lean on him, but he’s steadied himself before Sun Zheping can offer his shoulder.
“It’s just that,” Zhang Jiale explains with a sigh. “You always seemed so strong, you know? Nothing could rattle you, and I was so easily rattled. Back then, I couldn’t see how much you were struggling. And now I know I only made things worse.”
Doesn’t Zhang Jiale know he’s long been forgiven?
“I’m really glad you’re back.”
Sun Zheping smiles. He’s glad to be back too. All the glory, all the excitement, it can’t ever happen again the way he used to dream it. But dreams are for sleeping, and he is wide awake.
He leans his head on his former partner’s shoulder.
“I’ve really missed you, Zhang Jiale,” he says.
Things will never be easy like before. But look. They are side by side again, and his heart doesn’t ache.
Zhang Jiale flicks him on the forehead.
“Then when are you gonna unblock my number, you asshole?”
6. we sold ourselves for love but now we're free
10th Season
These days, Zhang Jiale’s heart aches every time he sees Sun Zheping.
Growing pains, he concludes.
This partner of his, the one he’s loved for so long, and so quietly. The one he’s missed for even longer, so secretly, hiding it even from himself.
He’s back, just like Zhang Jiale has long wished.
But Zhang Jiale has grown too sensible to think they could just fall back into place.
No, he’s long let go of Sun Zheping.
But it still aches.
Today they are fighting in the individual match. Zhang Jiale had been prepared for this possibility and wasn't too shocked.
Once again they match each other hit for hit, blood for blood. It’s a strange rhythm; Unused to drawing blood from each other, they dance an awkward dance. The music is the same, but they’re both dancing outdated moves.
This picture… This perfect picture.
But Zhang Jiale isn’t the version of himself that Sun Zheping used to know, and he’d prove it.
Switch up the pace!
Dazzling Hundred Blossoms’ light envelopes the berserker, and he hides within it, guns ablazing, knocking out as much HP as he could.
Sure, the past is sweet, but look how much better he is than before!
He gets into his own rhythm, his fingers moving easily across the keyboard. This is just another opponent, another obstacle on his way to the ultimate victory. No need to think too much of it, or waste time on sentimentality.
Wait.
Look at that.
A silhouette finds its way through the blinding display, heading straight for him.
What was this? His mind goes back to that scene from ten years ago; That summer they met, and Sun Zheping had found the rhythm in his chaos, finding him easily. Hadn’t it looked almost like this?
Sun Zheping has found him again.
And they are the only ones standing on this field.
But Sun Zheping does not stay his sword.
Zhang Jiale doesn’t hold back either.
“Good luck,” his old partner says.