Work Text:
Which would you rather
"Which would you rather, drown in chocolate or drown in..."
"drown in chocolate"
"I didn't even finish the sentence"
"It's chocolate, always chocolate".
I loved chocolate. I also loved Potters arse, but somehow that had never come up.
Until it did:
"Ok... Fuck potter or fuck...."
"Fuck potter"
Oops. Was I a bit quick there? I saw every neck in the room swivel and felt every single eye on me,
for a minute, then they all went back to concentrating on their homework, or chatting, or playing chess (or at least pretending to.)
Theo, Blaise and Pansy all leaned in and continued to contemplate my face.
"Something you want to share Draco?" Asked Pansy
I felt myself flush. Malfoy's didn't go red. Slytherins didn't get embarrassed, I reminded myself, desperately trying to look nonchalant again.
"I was going to say or fuck a hippogriff, but looks like there was no need".
Blaise was coolly surveying me.
"No, well I mean" I blustered, "obviously any things better than fucking a hippogriff, that's what I meant. I mean how would you even..." I tailed off, making some vague pattern in the air with my hands, which I supposed denoted trying to get ones dick into a hippogriff's arse.
"I didn't even say hippogriff that time"
"Noooo, but you were going to! You always say hippogriff. What would you rather, drown in chocolate or get drowned in hippogriff dung? Take a crucio, or be stomped on by a hippogriff, fuck potter or... See what I mean?"
Blaise continued to look at me with his eyebrow slightly raised. Obviously still not convinced.
"Honestly Draco? I didn't even know you swung that way"
"What you didn't know I was gay?" I looked at him, shocked."I told you I was gay back in 5 th year, heck we even..."
"Yes yes" he quickly cut me off, glancing round the room nervously himself now. The other slytherins were pretending not to be listening in;
"I meant I didn't know you swung that way... You know, a potterphile"
"What???" This time I could feel the flush creeping all the way from the back of my neck up to my forehead, completely covering my face.
"I am not a potterphile" I said through gritted teeth. 'I just think he has a nice arse' I added to myself 'and I wank over it every night... He also has amazing eyes. And he saved us all, of course, from that dark wanker. But still, definitley not a potterphile.'
"Draco... Are you there?" Pansy was waving her hand in front of my face. I batted it away.
"Ok, someone else's go... Theo?"