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When he’d first noticed the subtle grey streaks near his father’s temples, Jordan hadn’t thought much of it.
His dad was approaching his late forties, after all. And his mother had been complaining about her own grey hairs for years. It had seemed like a pretty normal development.
In retrospect, he realized that he should have known better.
It had been four years since he had learned the truth and that had been enough time to realize that things were never what they appeared when it came to their family.
But things didn’t click into place until several months later, when he’d been rummaging around under the sink in his parents’ bathroom. His search for a fresh bottle of shampoo had come to an abrupt stop when he noticed an odd looking back box stashed there.
‘Insta-Grey,’ it said beside a picture of a man with streaks similar to the ones his dad now had.
‘Even out your tone and create a dignified style.’
Even though it was a fairly mundane looking product, Jordan had instantly frozen as he tried to take it in. He hadn’t known that this sort of thing existed (not that he’d ever looked into it) and it certainly hadn’t occurred to him that his father had been faking his new look.
Why would he do that?
Jordan couldn’t help but wonder and he had a sinking feeling that there was more behind this than there appeared.
He’d briefly contemplated calling his dad right away but then he remembered that he was out running with Jon. As perplexed as he was, he knew it wasn’t an emergency and it didn’t feel right to interrupt their practice. Jon had been struggling with his late but rapid onset of powers and he definitely needed to take every opportunity necessary to get things under control before they left for college in the fall.
So, instead, he’d grabbed the mysterious box of hair dye and taken it with him to his room. All thoughts of a shower instantly forgotten.
Reading and re-reading the package didn’t provide any clarity, but he’d done it anyway while keeping an ear out for his father’s arrival back home.
Clearly, this seemed to indicate that his dad was not actually going grey yet, and that he wanted to for some reason. Jordan couldn’t shake the weirdness and nervousness that seemed to well at the thought. Why wouldn’t his dad just wait for it to happen naturally.
Unless it wasn’t going to for some reason…
The more he thought about it, the more he realized that his dad really didn’t seem to change much as the years passed. All of the old photos of him from his 20s that his grandmother had hung around the house were fairly similar to how he appeared now. He’d always just been ‘dad,’ and Jordan (foolishly?) had never thought much of it.
But beneath the wooly sweaters and glasses, he suddenly realized, the man did look quite youthful for his age.
Jordan allowed himself to hover a few feet above the bed as he continued to think things through. It had become a habit for him in the year since his flight had kicked in— it was a way to expend a bit of excess energy when he began to feel overwhelmed.
There was a comfort to this form of letting go that was difficult to explain to anyone else. Floating comfortably in the privacy of his room was a much-needed release. Although today it felt a little more unsettling than it usually did.
Jordan couldn’t help but glance towards the mirror as he sat cross-legged in the air. His reflection started back— his youth and uniqueness striking him in that moment.
He was clearly his father’s son. That had been clear for longer than he’d known. With his recently cropped hair and increasingly defined features, he looked more like the man than ever. And even though no one outside of their family could tell, Jordan knew that so much of who he’d become had its origins light years away.
He had the face of an El.
And a body that was brimming with Kryptonian power.
As much as he tried to hold onto the fact that he’d been born here with an equal link to humanity, he’d started to wonder what that really meant in recent years. No human could understand how it felt to be him or what sensations he experienced on a daily basis.
His father was the only person who could understand all of that. And, in time, it appeared that his brother would too.
No matter what anyone said, Jordan knew that he’d ended up on one side more firmly and tangibly than the other.
As he floated above the bed, waiting and wondering, he couldn’t help but acknowledge how different he was then nearly everyone else on this planet.
And he was pretty sure he’d accidentally stumbled across yet another thing that was going to set him apart.
Finally, just after noon, he heard the distinct sound of his father and brother coming to an abrupt halt near the barn. He contemplated speeding down himself and asking the questions that were now burning in the back of his mind but he decided against it.
Jon was having a difficult few weeks, with both his speed and strength surging at once. If Jordan was correct in his suspicions, perhaps now wasn’t the time to share them with his brother.
He wanted to talk to his dad first. Alone.
So he’d called out his name, requesting that he pop upstairs as soon as he could.
Unsurprisingly, ‘as soon as he could’ was less than a second later. Clark entered the room just in time to see Jordan drop back onto the bed from above.
The slight concern on the older man’s face mingled with amusement as he realized what his son had been doing.
“Floating again?” he remarked from his spot at the doorway. “It feels good, doesn’t it?” he acknowledged, not waiting for an answer.
Jordan nodded slowly. “Yeah,” he replied, voice softer than usual as he tried not to dwell on the wider implications of how well they could now relate to each other.
Of course his father understood these things. He knew exactly how it felt to be so irrefutably alien. And generally, that was a huge comfort.
Right now, however, his fresh suspicions made things feel more uncomfortable than usual.
His father instantly seemed to notice his contemplative mood and the amusement faded quickly. He took a step further into the room, sitting on the desk chair that faced Jordan’s bed.
“Is everything okay?”
“Yeah,” the teen hastily replied, not wanting to cause too much worry. There wasn’t an emergency or anything. Things had generally been smooth sailing power-wise in the last year, even since everything had finally settled in.
He had the full gambit of Kryptonian powers now and an impressive amount of control.
He couldn’t help but wonder if that meant he had the full gambit of Kryptonian traits too.
He was pretty sure he’d just discovered a new one.
“But,” he began again, pulse quickening as he forced things out, “I accidentally found this earlier.”
He held up the box of dye, his eyes immediately flickering to the patches of (fake) grey he could see in the man’s hair in front of him.
It was a good product, at least. Jordan truly wouldn’t have been able to tell that it wasn’t real if he didn’t know.
“Why are you pretending to go grey?” he asked, starring pointedly ahead. Already quite sure that he knew the (unsettling answer).
His dad hesitated for a moment, taking a deep breath as he realized what this was actually about.
The worried grimace on his face told Jordan pretty much everything he needed to know.
Then, a moment later, he began to confirm the teenagers suspicions (and fears).
“I need to keep up appearances, Jordan,” he said plainly, making no attempt to deny anything. The time for lies had passed long ago. That, at least, was a relief. “It would be too suspicious if I stayed the same, especially in a small town where people tend to notice things.”
The boy gave a curt nod, gripping the side of the bed as he prompted for more.
“You’re not ageing like a human,” he added bluntly, needing to have it all laid out.
“I’m not ageing at all,” his dad clarified, a heaviness setting into his shoulders at the remark. This was something that clearly weighed on him.
As new as the concept was, Jordan was pretty sure he understood why. Sure, not having to deal with getting older had an appeal and some obvious advantages. But the downsides were just as big.
Staying frozen in time as everyone around you gradually faded away…that was a lot. His body squirmed with discomfort at the mere thought. He couldn’t bring himself to fully wrap his head around how painful that would be.
Though perhaps he’d have no choice one day.
So much of what had happened to him during the past four years had been beyond his control. He hadn’t been able to stop himself from slowly changing. He had no say over how forcefully his Kryptonian side had surged.
There was no reason to think he’d have a say over this either.
“Why not?” he knew that he needed to press for more. And he felt a sudden pang of annoyance that this was only coming to light now. Because of what he’d stumbled across.
It felt like a pretty big thing. And he’d been under the assumption that his dad wasn’t hiding things from them anymore.
He talked about their powers and their unique heritage frequently. They’d had countless trips to the Fortress to learn about themselves and their family’s history. He’d learned Kryptonian and honed his powers with dedication and persistence.
Naively, he’d thought that he knew pretty much all there was to know.
But apparently, that wasn’t the case.
His dad let out another heavy breath.
“Well, for starters,” he began, “even on Krypton, people lived much longer lives than the people here. The average lifespan was about one hundred and sixty earth years.”
Jordan folded his arms across his chest.
“Oh,” he remarked dryly, not bothering to mask his displeasure at the fact that this hadn’t been raised before now. “That seems worth mentioning, dad.”
His father paused for a moment before nodding back. Jordan instantly recognized that apologetic gaze.
It was the one he got every time his sons had to deal with another crazy aspect of their unique status. He hadn’t been subject to as many of them recently (it was now Jon who got the brunt of it), but he knew that face well.
“It’s not something I like thinking about,” his father replied, “I…I honestly try not to let it cross my mind. Especially since it’s even more complicated here,” the man hesitated before pushing himself on, “it is too early to know for sure, but the effect of the yellow sun on Kryptonian cells seems to be restorative. My father theorized that I wouldn’t age at all once I reached my prime and, so far, that appears to be the case.”
Jordan felt a sharp joke run though him, even though that was more or less what he’d been bracing himself for for the last half-hour.
It was an insane thing to wrap his head around and he blinked numbly towards his father, unable to hide the look of disbelief on his face.
“Jordan, I’m sorry, I know I should have mentioned this but like I said, I—“
“What about me and Jon?”
He didn’t want excuses, he just wanted answers.
In all honesty, he didn’t know what he preferred in that moment. Escaping the inevitable, at least for a long time, was clearly not all bad. But the implications this held for his (extremely long?) life were huge.
Would he still be roaming around this farm centuries from now, reminiscing about the countless people he had loved and lost?
He could hear his mother’s footsteps downstairs and instantly felt a lump building in his throat as his mind drifted to her. He couldn’t bring himself to think the worst, but there was no question that she wasn’t like them.
She was human.
A sinking sensation welled up inside.
“I’m so much like you now, dad,” he said, eyes wide as he continued to look ahead. “I have all of your powers. According to grandma, I function just like any other Kryptonian under a yellow sun. And Jon has started changing now too.”
He watched as his father shut his eyes for a second and he knew what answer he was about to receive.
“I haven’t run those tests,” his father confessed softly, “but yes, I’m guessing that you’ll both be like me.”
Jordan let out a long breath, barely noticing the slight puff of frost that seemed to accompany it.
This was not how he’d envisioned his day (or his life) and his mind spun as he tried to think things through.
Jordan looked down at his hands, clenching them in front of him with more force than any human was capable of. In that moment, he felt more distanced— more freakish— than he ever had before. And that was something he’d once thought was impossible.
He could shoot fire from his eyes and crush metal with his fists. He could hear the entire world at once.
He could fly.
And yet, realizing that he was not subject to one of the most universal elements of the human condition was somehow more to grapple with. He’d always just assumed that his life would follow a standard pattern, at least.
He’d grow up, go to college, get a job, start a family, grow old…
But maybe he wouldn’t get to experience all of that. Maybe, at some point within the next decade, he’d simply be frozen in time.
Working to hide even more differences from the world around him.
Just like his dad was doing now.
“You need to test us,” he said resolutely. Now that he was aware of this possibility, he knew he’d prefer to just figure things out. “You need to tell Jon.”
His dad gave another nod.
“We’ll all talk,” he agreed, lips setting into a thin line.
Jordan wondered if they were both thinking about the same thing. Jon hadn’t been coping too well with the sudden realization that he wasn’t ‘the human one’ after all. After six months of rapidly emerging powers, he’d just barely begun to exhibit a bit of self acceptance.
It certainly didn’t feel like this revelation would help matters. But it was worse to keep things covered up.
Jordan had assumed that his parents had already learned that. But, apparently, a few things had fallen to the wayside.
He truly hoped that this was finally it.
“Anything else you’ve been keeping from us?” he couldn’t help but ask. The bitterness he hadn’t felt as much of in the last two years creeping into his tone. “I’m not going to…I don’t know, suddenly turn green when I’m in my 50s or something, am I?”
His dad gave him a look but chose not to comment on the snark.
“I’ve been trying my best to share everything with you boys,” the man replied, “and I’m sorry that this particular aspect didn’t come up yet. I wasn’t trying to withhold information. Like I said, it’s something I’m still grappling with and I know I’ve allowed myself to slip into a bit too much denial. I’m sorry, Jordan.”
He could sense the earnestness behind the words, and it was clear that his father did feel the weight of this. It didn’t fully quell his annoyance, but he tried to hold back.
He wasn’t the angry kid he’d once been. They’d come a long way over the years, and he did know how much his father tried.
Four years was a long time, but maybe it wasn’t quite enough to cover everything. Especially with everything they’d gone through during that period. Life was often pretty crazy, and there was rarely time for quiet contemplation.
Though he was pretty sure that’s what he needed right now.
“I think I want to be alone,” the teenager said, glancing towards the window where the empty blue sky enticingly called out to him.
His dad (as usual) seemed to catch his drift.
Like it or not, he’d always be the one who could understand.
“Above the clouds and out of sight, okay?” he said, not stopping him but giving his same cautionary reminder.
“Yeah dad.”
Jordan stood up and moved towards the window. His limbs felt oddly numb and his head seemed to be buzzing, but he did his best to stay steady.
The teen reached for the window pane and was about to pull it open when a firm hand on his shoulder made him pause.
He turned his head to see his father standing at his side, the worry still etched on his brow.
“We’ll keep talking when you get back,” he said, eyes flickering towards the sky above. “And Jordan,” he added, his hand still firmly in place. “I want you to know that, no matter what, you’ll never be alone.”
Jordan nodded back.
As weird and mind blowing as everything currently felt, he did know that was true.
He did his best to hold on to that as he allowed himself to soar beyond the clouds.
His life would never be normal— and perhaps it would be longer than he could possibly conceive— but at least he wasn’t the only one.
He and dad and Jon would be side by side until the end of it all.
It was a bittersweet thought.