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BREAKING NEWS: SWIM TEAM STAR PARK SEONGHWA QUITS
Monday blues is met with sad news as Park Seonghwa, our very own swim team captain, has announced his departure from the team. Swim team coach Mr.Kim has revealed very little on the matter as he expresses that the reason behind Seonghwa’s sudden exit is due to “personal matters that should not concern the school.” Seonghwa comments that he will “support the swim team from the sidelines and he hopes the very best for them this season.”
Park Seonghwa had joined the team in his first year and immediately beat the school record as he placed gold in the regionals. The score helped the team to move to provincials and…
“Mingi!” Hongjoong calls the other, moving his eyes away from the article in front of him to meet the gaze of a very startled Mingi who was in the middle of playing Candy Crush on the phone.
“I’m right next to you,” Mingi grumbles in slight annoyance, but he puts his phone away because he knows that when Hongjoong gets that look in his eyes he goes a little crazy.
“More than half of this article is just information about Seonghwa’s accomplishments!” Hongjoong complains, jabbing his finger at the draft for today’s school newspaper that’s on his laptop screen.
Mingi, who spent the better half of his weekend trying to write the article after they received the news from a hidden source (the hidden source being Yeosang’s boyfriend Wooyoung who is on the swim team), simply shrugs, “I couldn’t get much information about why he left so I had to fill up the page somehow.”
Hongjoong had only been president of the school newspaper for a couple of months, but the amount of gray hair he had developed from the experience so far is substantial.
He rubs his temples, “You could have prodded for more information.”
“Mr.Kim is scary!” Mingi protests.
Which he is indeed, even Hongjoong hesitates talking to Mr.Kim so he let that one go, “And Seonghwa?”
Mingi sighs, “You know how he’s like, he’s too nice! How am I supposed to bug him for information when he’s staring at me with those puppy dog eyes!?”
Hongjoong rolls his eyes and looks back at his screen, the bright glare making his eyes strain slightly - he’s been staring at his computer screen since 7:30 am, “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he grumbles, wishing more than anything that he had grabbed a coffee before he had come to school.
“Dude, I think you know exactly what I am talking about,” Mingi slyly suggests. There’s a strong implication underneath those words, but before Hongjoong could question Mingi’s tone, Yeosang barges into their club room holding two large coffees in his hand.
“You guys are way too loud at 8 am I can hear you in the hallway,” he greets as he puts one of the coffees next to Hongjoong and the older mumbles a very grateful thanks. Grabbing a chair he sits next to the other side of their president and Mingi pouts slightly as Yeosang is far away from him.
“How come I don't get free coffee?” Mingi complains, his pout deepening.
Yeosang reaches into his pocket and grabs a granola bar, “You don’t even like coffee,” he responds matter-of-factly tossing the snack over to Mingi who catches it happily.
“Good work on the article about the debate championship and the United Nations club,” Hongjoong compliments Yeosang, his eyes still on the screen, “the newspaper for this week is ready to print to be distributed for lunch but the front page needs work.”
“Hey, I tried my best!” Mingi objects and Hongjoong knows he did so he pats Mingi on the head.
“It’s well-written,” he praises and Mingi smiles widely.
Hongjoong turns to Yeosang who is watching the whole exchange with a small smile, “Did Wooyoung say anything about Seonghwa leaving?”
Yeosang shakes his head, “No, honestly he seemed pretty confused as to why Seonghwa left too,” he frowns slightly, “and heartbroken… I had to console him all weekend.”
Groaning, Hongjoong ruffles his hair in frustration, “We need to get a better quote from Seonghwa. How are we supposed to release this article when it basically says no new information but that Seonghwa is leaving which the whole school will probably know by lunch anyway, and why did Jongho use this photo that he had taken of Seonghwa?”
Yeosang squints at the photo displayed on Hongjoong’s screen, it’s a photo that Jongho had taken at the last championship in which Seonghwa is wearing a gold medal that he won at the nationals.
“What's wrong with the photo?” Yeosang asks.
“He looks too…” Hongjoong starts, his tongue tied in how to respond to the question and he stares intensely at the photo that takes up half his screen. In the photo Seonghwa’s mouth is split into a wide grin, his round dark brown eyes are sparkling in happiness and his cheeks are tinted with red. But the worst thing is the way his hair is wet from being in the pool a couple of hours prior and the way the thin swim team t-shirt sticks to his perfectly toned body. He looks…
“...hot,” Mingi finishes the sentence with a smug look on his face.
Yeosang snorts and Hongjoong turns red. He glares at Mingi whose smile only turns wider, “Am I wrong?” Mingi questions in a way that tells that he knows that he isn't.
“Yes,” Hongjoong contradicts through clenched teeth, “the photo isn't well suited to the article.”
“In what way?” Yeosang asks in a serious tone though there is a playful glint in his eyes, “the article is about Seonghwa and the swim team, and is that not a photo of Seonghwa as a member of the swim team?”
Hongjoong pinches his nose bridge, he hates it when they gang up on him.
Where is Jongho when I need him? At least he pretends to be diplomatic.
Seeing the distress on Hongjoong’s face, Mingi stifles his laughter, “Come on you are not going to melt into a puddle just because you admitted he’s hot. Almost everyone in school thinks he is.”
Seonghwa and his hotness is one thing that Hongjoong very much does not want to think about. It creates side effects such as increased heartbeat, sweaty hands and an obnoxiously red blush on his cheeks.
“Can we focus the on the matter at hand,” Hongjoong practically hisses, hating how warm his face feels, “we need to figure out how to get down to the truth of why Seonghwa left the swim team.”
Yeosang gets a thoughtful look on his face, which either means that Yeosang is going to say something really smart or something that would make Hongjoong want to strangle him.
“Weren’t you his lab partner in chemistry last semester?” He suddenly brings up, “I thought you guys got close through that, maybe if you ask him he’ll tell you.”
It’s the latter then.
“I did not get close to him,” Hongjoong says hotly, trying not to let his temper get the best of him, unlike the rest of his juniors Hongjoong doesn’t like to be mad at Yeosang that often. Blame his innocent-looking face and pure doe-like eyes.
“You spent almost every day at his house, and we didn’t even have that many projects for that class,” Mingi interjects, and Hongjoong’s migraine increases tenfold.
Advanced chemistry is a class that Hongjoong very much likes to forget about. Not only was the class incredibly difficult and caused him to be so traumatized that now even looking at the periodic table makes him flinch, but he was also matched with Park Seonghwa as his lab partner.
He had never really hated the swimmer (now ex-swimmer), but Hongjoong hated the way the boy made him feel. It’s all twisted nerves, tightly knotted ropes in his stomach, and sweaty palms if Seonghwa had even made eye contact with Hongjoong (which happened way too often even before they were paired as lab partners - the unfortunate side effect of both of their extracurricular activities as the newspaper does a lot of articles on the swim team). Hongjoong wanted the ground to swallow him up the moment the teacher had announced the pairing, then Seonghwa looked over at him and smiled all sweetly and Hongjoong wanted to die right there and then.
Seonghwa makes him feel a lot and Hongjoong hates it.
The only thing that kept him from walking out of the science room was the thought that now that he had to spend time with Seonghwa he could finally know how imperfect Seonghwa could be. People in school speak of him as if he were a God; as if he was perfection personified and he could do no wrong. In his mind, Hongjoong was already putting together the expose about the beloved star swimmer but within the first few days of being Seonghwa’s lab partner, all the thoughts of that article were scrapped.
Because Park Seonghwa was all that.
He is super smart (Hongjoong’s mark would be significantly low if it weren’t for him), gentle (he could barely even hurt a fly), kind (he's way too nice), giving (he volunteers at the children's hospital-like who even does that) and has impeccable manners (the first time Seonghwa went over to Hongjoong’s place for a project he had bowed a full 90 degrees to Hongjoong’s parents). He can cook, is super clean and has impeccable hygiene (which most high school boys find difficult to achieve).
And worst of all, they got along splendidly. They were always on the same page, whether it be their course work or in random discussions they would have as they procrastinated on their school work. They took interest in each other’s hobbies (Seonghwa had found journalism fascinating and Hongjoong was mildly interested in competitive swimming). And when they talked - they did so for hours. Over the phone or even in person. They would meet up under the excuse of doing a project for chemistry and end up doing barely any work.
Hongjoong can begrudgingly admit that they had become friends of some sorts during the semester.
But the feelings were still there and over the course of the semester, they became worse.
Now his heart started fluttering too, and his cheeks would grow red. The knots in his stomach had become tighter, his palms got more clammy with even the mention of Seonghwa’s name and there were those dreams - those darn stupid dreams.
He hates it. He wanted to stop feeling it.
“Hongjoong,” Mingi calls out to him, breaking Hongjoong away from his thoughts, “if someone that he actually knew asked him he would probably give an answer.”
Gosh he hates when Mingi starts being logical.
“If Wooyoung couldn’t even get an answer out of him, why do you think I could?” Hongjoong weakly argues.
“Wooyoung is part of the swim team,” Yeosang reasons, “it would be difficult to talk to an ex-teammate about why you left no matter how close you are.”
Hongjoong’s grinds his teeth, “Fine I will ask him but I wasn’t even that close with him anyway.”
Mingi and Yeosang don’t look like they believe him, but Hongjoong doesn’t care. He sends today’s newspaper to the office to get it printed and leaves the club room in a hurry before his juniors start pestering him more. He loves them, he really does but sometimes there is only so much he can take before noon.
Then as he waits for his first class to start he stares off at his blank notebook page as he brainstorms how exactly to approach Seonghwa.
See, Hongjoong has an issue. His number one solution to any problem that he doesn’t know to deal with is to run away from it.
So when Seonghwa started becoming a problem Hongjoong did the one thing he knew how to do. He ran away from Seonghwa. Not literally, since it’s not like Hongjoong can just stop going to school or move towns. But he started to ignore Seonghwa the moment the semester ended.
All of Seonghwa’s texts went ignored, and the chat between them is muted on Hongjoong’s phone so he doesn’t get notifications (for some reason Hongjoong couldn’t bring himself to block the other). If Seonghwa tried to strike a conversation with him in person, Hongjoong pretended he didn’t hear or would just speed walk away. Even just the sight of Seonghwa would get him to walk away in the opposite direction. Seonghwa even approached him at lunch once while he was sitting with his friends but just seeing the familiar black hair walk towards him from the corner of his eyes got him to bolt out of the room. It isn't an easy task to ghost Seonghwa but it is significantly easier than it would have been since Hongjoong doesn’t share any classes with Seonghwa this semester.
At a point Seonghwa caught the hint and didn’t bother him anymore. And they were back to being strangers.
So how is Hongjoong supposed to go back to conversing with Seonghwa normally as if nothing had happened?
He could approach the situation as a journalist. Walk up to Seonghwa as the school paper’s president and inquire about his leave that way. But Hongjoong knows that the effort would be fruitless. Seonghwa wouldn’t reveal the truth to the journalist Kim Hongjoong. It would be more awkward that way anyway. Imagine someone not talking to you for weeks, and then coming up to you and bombarding you with personal questions. Hongjoong shivers at the thought.
No, he has to deal with this delicately. He can do this. He is a journalist, first and foremost. If he has to stick himself back to Seonghwa to do this, he will.
Lunchtime rolls around and when Hongjoong enters the cafeteria he sees Seonghwa sitting with his usual group of friends, which is basically the whole swim team (the exception being Wooyoung who eats lunch with Yeosang).
So he still hangs out with them, Hongjoong thinks, so the possibility of him leaving due to bad blood between the team is 0. Not that it was much of a possibility to begin with anyway. It’s Seonghwa afterall.
Hongjoong sees Seonghwa laugh at something his friend says and Hongjoong has that feeling bloom across his chest again.
Hongjoong takes in a shuddering breath, this is for the newspaper, he reminds himself.
He walks up to Seonghwa for the first time in months.
Seonghwa doesn’t notice Hongjoong walk up to him as he is too busy talking to the friend next to him. But the rest of his table does, they all stare at him as if he was some kind of alien and Hongjoong self-consciously rubs at his cheeks, wondering if there was something stuck on his face to make them all look at him like that.
When Seonghwa does notice him his eyes grow comically wide at the sight of Hongjoong in front of him. His mouth opens into a small ‘o’ shape as he regards Hongjoong with shock.
“Hi,” Hongjoong greets, feeling like he’s melting inside and out.
“Hongjoong?” Seonghwa greets back, and Hongjoong suppresses the shivers that run up his spine at the way Hongjoong’s name falls so delicately out of Seonghwa’s mouth.
“Want to have lunch with me?” Hongjoong asks abruptly, his heart pounding so wildly in his ears that he could barely hear himself even say the words.
Seonghwa raises his eyebrows at the question, and Hongjoong is so sure that Seonghwa was going to reject him. Why would he say yes? In Seonghwa’s perspective, Hongjoong had ghosted him for no reason and is suddenly talking to him. If Hongjoong was in his place not only would he say no, but he would throw water at the other’s face.
But Seonghwa, ever the one to surprise and again proving how much of a better person he is than Hongjoong, simply nods, “Sure,” he says though he sounds anything but, his face looking like how it would when he was trying to solve a difficult chemistry question.
As they walk over to an empty table, Hongjoong only then notices the number of people staring at Seonghwa. Most of them whisper silently to their friends as they steal glances at him and a lot of them had the school newspaper spread on their table.
Seonghwa pays no heed to the attention. Maybe it’s because he’s used to people whispering about him, or maybe he genuinely doesn't notice.
When they sit down Seonghwa carefully takes his lunch out of his bag. He neatly organizes the different canteen boxes in front of him and delicately places his utensils on top of his napkin.
And god, Hongjoong missed him so much.
Just seeing Seonghwa being his naturally freakish OCD self is making Hongjoong’s heart leap through hoops.
This is for the newspaper, Hongjoong reminds himself firmly, that’s it. There’s nothing else to this.
Hongjoong takes out his lunch too, a singular thermos because unlike Seonghwa Hongjoong has a fairly small appetite so he only brings a lunch fit for one person.
They’re silent and Seonghwa is staring at him as if he expects Hongjoong to talk first.
And oh right, Hongjoong is the one who invited Seonghwa so he should be the one to talk first.
Hongjoong clears his throat awkwardly.
“I’m sorry for ignoring you,” Hongjoong finds himself apologizing as he untwists his thermos because even though he knows he needed to do ghost Seonghwa he also realizes that it was pretty much a dick move, “I was just going through some personal stuff,” the words sound bitter in his mouth, but technically it is not a lie just not the full truth.
“Personal stuff,” Seonghwa echoes, his voice hollow and his eyes blinking owlishly.
“Yeah,” Hongjoong responds quietly, his eyes trailed onto the soup that his mom had packed him, the liquid always a little too spicy for his taste.
“Is it still too spicy for you?” Seonghwa asks suddenly, following Hongjoong’s gaze to the soup.
The red soup stares back at Hongjoong mockingly and Hongjoong nods. He tries not to think too much about how Seonghwa remembers his spicy lunches and his intolerance to spice.
Seonghwa sighs, “You should let her know,” he says seriously.
“She wakes up so early to make it for me I don’t want to complain about it,” Hongjoong grumbles. His mother wakes up earlier than everyone in the house just to make Hongjoong a warm lunch before she goes to work so even if his mother gives him sour porridge for lunch Hongjoong will find a way to eat it.
Seonghwa stares at Hongjoong warmly and Hongjoong shifts uncomfortably underneath that gaze.
Has the cafeteria always been that hot? He thinks while tugging on the collar of the shirt.
Seonghwa’s eyes fall down to the collar that Hongjoong is fidgeting with and the exposed skin that Hongjoong’s tugging had caused. Hongjoong’s neck flushes and Seonghwa blinks the gaze away while clearing his throat.
Seonghwa reaches into his backpack and pulls out a carton of banana milk and places it in front of Hongjoong, “This will help,” he tells Hongjoong gently.
Hongjoong smiles weakly as his heart beats widely in his chest “Thanks.”
Seonghwa smiles back at him sweetly and picks up his chopsticks, “I read the school newspaper today, Mingi has really improved with his writing, I was blushing with how he wrote my accomplishments.”
Hongjoong couldn’t help the proud smile from spreading on his face, “He’s got so much better. I always knew he had a knack for writing; he just needed a way to hone that talent.”
“And Yeosang,” Seonghwa says, “he really found his voice, I have noticed how his articles become much more distinct over the last couple of publications. And Jongho really has learned how to capture the perfect photo.”
Hongjoong’s jaw drops slightly. Seonghwa has been keeping up with the newspaper. Sure, a lot of people in school read the newspaper, but most only skim the first page. Hongjoong forgot how invested Seonghwa used to be with Hongjoong’s stories of the newspaper club’s antics. He had honestly thought at the time that Seonghwa was only pretending to care about it because he was being nice. But Seonghwa likes to prove him wrong in all the best ways.
Because Seonghwa actually does care and when he cares about something he puts his whole heart into it.
“And you,” Seonghwa continues to say as he digs into his lunch, “you do such a great job leading them, the newspaper has never been this popular before.”
A flurry of butterflies dance around Hongjoong’s stomach. He feels his neck flush slightly at the compliment. His palms are clammy again and his stupid heart won’t stop beating quickly.
Seonghwa continues to slurp his noodles as if he hasn’t just caused all those massive emotions to whirl inside Hongjoong’s tiny body.
Hongjoong takes in a deep breath to stabilize his rapidly beating heart. It’s just for the newspaper , he reminds himself again.
Not noticing Hongjoong’s inner turmoil, Seonghwa takes out a can of soda, cracks it open and puts a metallic straw in it before drinking it soundly. The noise from the drink sloshing up the straw slightly striking a nerve in Hongjoong’s forehead.
Who even drinks from a soda can like that? Hongjoong would have surely remembered if Seonghwa had this particular habit before but this seems to be a new development in Seonghwa's strange tendencies (like him bringing a lint roller literally everywhere). Hongjoong’s confusion must be clearly written on his face because Seonghwa looks back at him bashfully, almost looking ashamed and sheepish.
“Plastic straws kill the turtles,” Seonghwa explains.
Oh that was not what I was concerned about.
But before Hongjoong could even bring that up, Seonghwa swiftly changed the topic, “Did you see the new trailer for the new Bridgerton season? It’s premiering today.”
Hongjoong brings his finger to his lips, “Shhh not too loud,” he whispers.
Hongjoong’s affinity for romantic tv shows is a secret that only Seonghwa knows. He had confessed it once to Seonghwa when Seonghwa himself was rambling about the first season of Bridgerton and Hongjoong had found himself confessing to watching the first season and actually liking it as well. But he can’t let people know that he’s a closet romantic, his reputation will be ruined.
Seonghwa rolls his eyes but still lowers his voice, “It looks really good, have you seen Anthony?”
“Oh the scene when he was pulled out the water was brilliant,” Hongjoong gushes, trying to keep his voice as quiet as possible, “and Kate is absolutely gorgeous.”
“Oh and Edwina is so cute,” Seonghwa adds, “do you think they will make it into a love triangle, I don’t think they did that in the books.”
And Hongjoong knows they didn’t in the books, because he had read all the books in the series (underneath his blanket in the dead of the night using the light of his night light).
Before they knew it, they were talking as if they had never stopped, as if Hongjoong hadn’t just put a brake on their friendship for months. Their conversations have always been easy, a rhythmic cadence to them as if they had known each other for years and for a quick second in between sentences about bees and ball gowns Hongjoong considers that - of how easy it is with Seonghwa.
His chest tightens and he shakes that thought away.
The bell to signal the end of lunch comes too quickly. Seonghwa is in the middle of a sentence about Colin and Penelope when the noise interrupts him loudly. He finches as if he too was not expecting it to ring that quickly.
Hongjoong starts to put his lunch away, his shoulders feeling heavy.
He doesn’t want this to end. This feeling of ease that came with being with Seonghwa. He doesn't want that to end.
They must have looked silly, leaning close to each other and whispering gleefully as they munched on their lunches. But during that conversation, Hongjoong forgot about everyone else. For a couple of minutes there, it felt like there were only Seonghwa and Hongjoong in the world.
And Hongjoong didn’t want that to end. But his heart is still beating too fast and his chest is still too tight.
I still need to hang out with him to find the truth for the newspaper, Hongjoong thinks, and comes to a decision quickly.
Just as Seonghwa slings his backpack across his shoulder Hongjoong quickly asks, “Want to come over to my house and watch the premiere with me?”
Seonghwa stares at him gape-mouthed and Hongjoong’s heart is in his throat the moment that question escapes his lips.
“Sure,” Seonghwa answers, shaking away his initial shock at the question and smiling softly, “but we can’t binge-watch the entire season. I have a calculus test tomorrow.”
Hongjoong’s mouth tilts into a small smile, “Hm we’ll see if we can control ourselves,” then he blushes because oh gosh why did that sentence sound like that coming out of his mouth.
The tips of Seonghwa's ears turn red and then he laughs good-naturedly while waving goodbye, “I will see you by the front foyer, let’s walk to your place together,” he says as he walks away.
Like old times, Hongjoong thinks as he waves goodbye, and something in Hongjoong’s gut is saying that Seonghwa is thinking the same thing.
.
.
.
There aren’t many times that Hongjoong is grateful for his mother’s nagging but this is one of those times.
Rain is pouring like daggers outside, and the pelting of pebble-sized water droplets hitting the school windows sounds like crackles of static from a broken tv. From the foyer, students run outside to catch their bus, or worse, race home, as very few had brought their umbrellas with them. The day had been absolutely sunny before that point, and the weather network had predicted bright skies for the whole day that few expected it to be almost thunderous outside by the time the school bell rang to usher the students out of the school.
Luckily for him, Hongjoong’s mother had an inkling that it would rain and nagged Hongjoong about taking an umbrella with him to school. Hongjoong had only relented because he wanted her to stop nagging, but in the end, it is truly mothers who know best.
“Holy shit,” a familiar voice says from behind him.
Hongjoong turns around to find Seonghwa staring at the disaster outside in absolute shock.
“I know right,” Hongjoong agrees with a sigh, “never trust the weather network or the morning skies.”
“How am I supposed to go out?” Seonghwa practically whines, and he sounds so dispirited that it surprises Hongjoong. After all, it's just rain .
“I have an umbrella, we can share it,” Hongjoong says calmly, though his stomach is doing somersaults at just the thought of walking underneath the same umbrella as Seonghwa, both of their elbows knocking together and their mouths just one gentle tug away from -
Okay, stop that train of thought now.
Seonghwa glares at the rain as if it had personally insulted his mother.
“There’s a lot of puddles,” Seonghwa tells Hongjoong mournfully. And the way Seonghwa says it throws Hongjoong off because why was he talking as if somebody turned off the wifi.
“I’ll catch up with you later Hongjoong,” Seonghwa continues to say, his voice filled with dread, “I’ll have to stay here for a bit.”
“Why though?” Hongjoong wants to ask, but he stops himself because Seonghwa looks so visibly upset. His eyebrows are bundled up and his mouth is set into a frown so deep that Hongjoong didn’t even know that such a smiley person can have their muscles form that shape. It pushes him to just listen and not question it, which is a difficult feat given that all Hongjoong likes to do is question things (it’s why he fell into journalism easily).
At home, Hongjoong carefully sets things up for the premiere. His laptop is open on Netflix at the edge of his bed. He has made butter popcorn and caramel popcorn (because while Seonghwa has an impeccable sweet tooth Hongjoong hates the way caramel sticks to his teeth). He grabs some Pepsi from the fridge and waits.
And waits.
And waits.
The clock strikes 6 pm and it becomes very clear that Seonghwa is not going to come.
Hongjoong scrubs his eyes tiredly and glares at the clock. A lump has been forming in his throat as the minutes have passed by, and by now it’s so huge that Hongjoong couldn't swallow it down. His eyes are watery and his heart aches, but in a different way than it usually does with Seonghwa.
I deserve this, Hongjoong thinks dreadfully, with the way I ignored him I deserve this and more.
With his heart feeling like a million tons he plops back on his bed, not having the energy to even clean up. He buries his head into his pillow hoping to bury all the dreadful emotions circling his chest with it.
He hears his door open, and for a glorious second his mind deludes itself to think it’s Seonghwa, but his mother’s voice rushes out, plummeting that thought in a second.
“Were you waiting for someone Hongjoong?” his mother asks.
“No,” Hongjoong answers roughly into his pillow.
His mother makes his favourite food (marinated crab) for dinner so he knows that she knows that he’s lying. They don’t talk about it though. Thank god.
.
.
.
Hongjoong dreads going to school the next day. He has no idea what he is going to do when he sees Seonghwa. Should he continue ignoring him like he had done for the past couple of weeks or talk to him as if Seonghwa hadn’t just left him hanging at home with way too much popcorn for one person? Would Seonghwa now be the one to ignore him ? And there’s the whole newspaper ordeal to think of too (which honestly Hongjoong forgot about until the morning).
The weather must sense Hongjoong’s mood because it is gloomy as he is. The rain seems never-ending, though it doesn’t fall as harshly as it did yesterday, the raindrops still dribble continuously from the sky.
When Hongjoong does arrive at school, he does so with his heart in his throat but he does not catch sight of Seonghwa at all. Then at lunch Seonghwa is nowhere to be seen. At that point, Hongjoong is slightly concerned, did Seonghwa just not come to school? That was strange, after all, Seonghwa had a practically perfect attendance record.
As the bell rings to the end of the school day, the weather has practically turned upside down on its head. The gloomy rainy weather has turned into a sunny warm day that showed no evidence of the rain even happening.
Despite the improvement in the weather, Hongjoong’s mood did not improve. He finds himself roaming the hallways aimlessly. The after school meeting for the school newspaper had been cancelled because both Jongho and Mingi had come down with the cold (and he’s almost sure it’s because they both decided to do something ridiculous like play soccer in the rain again), which got him thinking what if Seonghwa had gotten sick too, maybe that is why he is not at school?
He’s concerned, so incredibly concerned, and he doesn’t know what to do with all the anxiousness boiling inside of him so he walks around mindlessly through the hallways hoping no teacher would catch him and kick him out. Before he knows it, he finds himself walking toward the indoor swimming pool. As he nears the entrance to the pool he sees a familiar mop of black hair and his heart halts in his chest.
There’s Seonghwa looking like he walked out of Hongjoong’s daydreams, all soft and beautiful in his plain white shirt and track pants, staring into the window of the entrance to the swimming pool. His mouth is formed into a small smile that doesn’t reach his eyes as he stares through the window, most likely watching the swim team practice.
He looks… lonely.
“Seonghwa,” Hongjoong calls out to him on instinct. Seonghwa’s eyes snap towards Hongjoong and it widens at the sight of him, and Hongjoong might have even seen Seonghwa’s eyes brighten at the sight of him - but surely that’s his imagination running wild.
“What are you doing here?” Seonghwa asks curiously as Hongjoong legs move on their own to get nearer to Seonghwa.
Hongjoong opens his mouth to respond but then he snaps it shut. Responding would mean telling Seonghwa how much he was affected by Seonghwa ditching him the other day. Something that Seonghwa obviously has no care about seeing that he’s acting like it didn’t even happen. Hongjoong doesn’t even know if he has the right to even feel offended since the stunts he had previously pulled with Seonghwa were worse.
But Hongjoong couldn’t help but feel so dreadfully sad and miserable, like the dirt clogged up underneath his shoe. It’s his miserable mood that pushes him to ask,
“Why did you not show up yesterday?”
Seonghwa’s eyebrows bundle up in confusion as if he has no idea what Hongjoong was talking about. For a delirious second Hongjoong thinks that he might have hallucinated the conversation he had with Seonghwa yesterday. But then comprehension dawns on Seonghwa’s face and Hongjoong feels less crazy.
“You didn’t see my texts?” Seonghwa asks back.
Now it’s Hongjoong’s turn to be confused, he hadn’t seen any text from Seonghwa. Then as quickly as that thought apparated in his head, another realization dawns upon him. He had muted his conversation with Seonghwa a while ago. If Seonghwa had texted him there was no way that Hongjoong would have seen it.
“No,” Hongjoong answers quietly, feeling slightly ridiculous for not have realizing this sooner, he doesn’t even want to elaborate on why he didn’t see the text to Seonghwa knowing that he would sound like a complete dick if he did.
Seonghwa runs his fingers through his hair, a slight frown gracing his pretty features, “Shit you probably thought I ditched you,” he states, “I didn’t. I wasn’t feeling well I swear Hongjoong I didn’t mean to ditch you I swear -”
“It’s not like it’s something I don’t deserve,” Hongjoong cuts Seonghwa off, hating the way Seonghwa was derailing with even the thought of him ditching Hongjoong when Hongjoong had done that to him for weeks without a show of remorse.
Seonghwa’s shoulders slump and there’s a soft look in his eyes as he stares at Hongjoong, “Oh Hongjoong that's all in the past,” he says gently.
And though Hongjoong already knew this he’s hit with the realization again - he doesn’t deserve Seonghwa’s kindness at all.
Feeling worse than he did before, Hongjoong takes in a deep breath to soothe the heaviness that he feels in his gut. He needs to move on from this topic. Now.
“What are you doing here?” he asks Seonghwa, in a poor attempt of doing so.
Seonghwa takes the bait easily and looks over at the window overseeing the swimming pool again, “I’m just watching them practice,” he answers simply.
“Why don’t you go inside?” Hongjoong questions.
“I shouldn’t,” Seonghwa answers vaguely and strangely Hongjoong understands.
“You should go for a swim after they’re done,” Hongjoong suggests, hoping that the idea would brighten Seonghwa’s mood. But it doesn’t, if anything Seonghwa looks gloomier at the thought.
“I can’t swim,” Seonghwa says, the words were odd coming out of a boy who has several gold medals under his belt for swimming.
This was the perfect time to ask Seonghwa why he left the swim team. But he just couldn’t. Even though he had told himself that this was his reason for rekindling his relationship with Seonghwa, he just couldn’t bring himself to pry.
It hits him that he actually doesn’t even care about the reason at all. He just hates how unhappy Seonghwa is.
Feelings that he had tried to stomp away come bubbling to the surface. Without thinking he reaches over and grabs Seonghwa’s hand gently. Seonghwa glances back at Hongjoong, his mouth slightly open in surprise at Hongjoong’s touch. Hongjoong has never been handsy, if anything he shied away from skinship - especially from Seonghwa.
Hongjoong ears are tinged red as he rubs slow circles with his thumb over Seonghwa’s knuckles in an effort to comfort him. But as Hongjoong’s fingertips tingle with the warmth of Seonghwa’s skin he wonders who he is really doing this for.
The door to the swimming pool bangs open and they break away from each other. And out comes Wooyoung still in his swim gear and sopping wet. He shakes his hair like a goddamn dog and water droplets get everywhere. Hongjoong flinches when some of the cold water attacks him and he almost cusses out Wooyoung then and there but Wooyoung finally catches sight of Seonghwa and his mouth widens into a grin.
“Seonghwa, hey!” he greets happily, but Seonghwa just stares at him in alarm, like a deer caught in headlights.
Seonghwa glances down at his arm which is now pretty wet with the water droplets then back at Wooyoung and Hongjoong. His alarm has morphed into something akin to fear. Before either Hongjoong or Wooyoung could question what is wrong, Seonghwa runs away with a speed that Hongjoong has never seen before.
Wooyoung stares at Soenghwa’s retreating back with sadness, his normally bright demeanour darkened with gloom.
“He probably just needed to go get something,” Hongjoong says, making up excuses for Seonghwa even though he knows it’s not really his place to do so.
Wooyoung turns towards Hongjoong and at the sight of the older his eyes narrow and his face morphs into a sneer.
Right then Hongjoong remembers Yeosang saying that Wooyoung is fiercely loyal and protective. Like an adorable German Shepard. Right now looking at Wooyoung reminded him of the neighbourhood dog that he was afraid of when he was younger - the dog always looking ready to bite - nothing adorable about it all. He reminds himself to ask Yeosang if his boyfriend hates his guts.
“So,” Wooyoung starts to say, his voice low and borderline terrifying, “you’re talking to him again?”
“Yeah,” Hongjoong squeaks, slightly scared.
Wooyoung's mouth purses into a thin line before he scoffs, “You really hurt him when you ignored him for weeks without any explanation.”
Suddenly Hongjoong feels like he has been doused with ice-cold water. He knows. Technically in the back of his head, he knows that he would have hurt Seonghwa in the process of running away from his own feelings. But to have someone straightforwardly telling him to his face how he hurt Seonghwa makes Hongjoong want to throw up.
“It was never my intention to,” Hongjoong responds weakly.
“Then what was,” Wooyoung retorts roughly.
Hongjoong is at a loss of words. Every response that he could come up with sounds stupid to even his own ears. Even the truth sounds stupid. To preserve his own self Hongjoong had wounded Seonghwa’s feelings. Hongjoong had been selfish, it’s as simple as that. His stomach churns with the realization and he feels a constant throbbing in his chest.
When Hongjoong doesn’t answer, Wooyoung just shakes his head as if he didn’t expect anything better, “I don’t know what your intentions are for suddenly getting back to him, but if you hurt him again the whole swim team will be on your ass,” Wooyoung threatens before walking away.
Hongjoong’s knees grow weak and he finds himself leaning against the wall for support. His knees fold as he curls up on the floor, and he brings his knees to his chest as he puts his forehead against his knee caps.
Fuck, he thinks as Wooyoung’s words echo loudly in his head. The words “you really hurt him” burning into his brain slowly.
He reaches into his pocket to grab his phone and that’s when he realizes that he’s trembling, his hands are shaking as he unlocks his phone and clicks on the chat he had muted with Seonghwa a while ago.
A mass amount of text messages pop up, and Hongjoong gulps at the sight. He doesn’t know why he decides to torture himself now but Hongjoong has always had a knack for kicking himself when he is down. With his heart heavy with dread he scrolls a bit up and starts reading from there:
02/20/2022
Hey Hongjoong, want to hang out after school today? We can rewatch A Star is Born.
02/24/2022
Not sure if you saw me waving to you in the hallways but lmk when ur free so we can hang out!!
03/01/2022
Hey, want to eat lunch together?
03/06/2022
I know we don’t have any classes together, but we both have Math this semester, we should study together!!
I hope I’m not being too pushy lol
03/07/2022
Hey Hongjoong, I’m sorry if I did something wrong to hurt you.
03/08/2022
Just let me know when you’re ready to talk.
03/25/2022
Hey!! I’m really sorry but I can’t make it tonight to watch the new season of Bridgerton. I’m not feeling too well and I need to stay home. Let’s watch it tomorrow for sure, hopefully, I will be better by then, but I’ll let you know!!
03/26/2022
I won’t be coming to school today :( I’ll see you tomorrow tho
Hey I’m feeling a lot better and I’m coming back to school to talk to Mr.Kim. Let me know if I could meet up with you!!
Lmao nvm school just ended so I won’t see you TT
Let’s meet up by the entrance tomorrow morning tho!! :)
Hongjoong’s eyes blur with tears as Seonghwa’s texts stare back at him. Each one of the messages was so sickeningly sweet and so Seonghwa, not a single one even remotely showing frustration or anger even when Hongjoong completely ignored him.
Hongjoong feels hot tears run down his cheeks and he angrily scrubs at them, his face warming up with anger at himself and sadness at how much he had hurt Seonghwa. His phone is digging so hard in his palms with how tightly he grips it and he curls in on himself as he hugs his knees.
“Hongjoong?” A voice calls out to him.
When Hongjoong looks up with tears still clinging to his eyes he finds Seonghwa staring down at him, out of breath with cheeks tinged in red as if he had run a marathon. His hair is dishevelled as if he had run his fingers through it countless times and his clothes are inside out.
Hongjoong rubs at his eyes to erase any trace of his tears but he must have done a horrible job because Seonghwa looks at him as if he just saw a puppy get kicked across the street.
He kneels so that he’s on the same level as Hongjoong, and so both of them are eye to eye.
“What happened?” Seonghwa asks softly.
Hongjoong opens his mouth to respond but stops because where does he even begin. He can’t even begin to explain how he feels right now so instead the words that tumble from his mouth is the only truth that he is able to express.
“I started talking to you again because I wanted to know why you quit the swim team for the school newspaper,” he says, so quietly that he almost wishes that Seonghwa doesn't hear it.
Seonghwa does hear it.
Hongjoong wishes that Seonghwa could get angry. That he would finally get frustrated by Hongjoong’s antics. That he would get annoyed and cuss Hongjoong out like he deserves.
But instead, Seonghwa just looks disappointed. Not even remotely shocked or surprised - just disappointed.
And that hurt Hongjoong more than any curse word that could have fallen from Seonghwa’s mouth.
Seonghwa runs his fingers through his hair, making his already messy hair more tangled, “I had a feeling,” he admitted lightly, then he covers his face with both of his palms and shakes his head.
“Sometimes you can be so cruel Hongjoong,” Seonghwa whispers, the words muffled through his palms but Hongjoong could hear it loud and clearly in his ears.
“I know,” Hongjoong croaks, blinking back the tears that threaten to spill.
Seonghwa sighs tiredly and he stands up. Hongjoong warily follows the movement, finding it difficult to say anything - an apology for forgiveness, a couple of words of excuses - nothing. Words just refuse to come out of his mouth.
Seonghwa gets a determined look in his eyes, similar to how he looks before he begins a race.
“Get up,” Seonghwa commands, and even his orders sound so tender when he is giving them to Hongjoong.
With weak knees, Hongjoong gets up and follows Seonghwa as he opens the door to enter the pool area. Hongjoong hadn’t noticed that the swim team had already left; the usually bustling swimming pool is now quiet and serene.
“You wanted to know why I left the swim team,” Seonghwa says as walks towards the pool, his voice echoing loudly in the emptiness, “I’ll tell you why.”
“Seonghwa,” Hongjoong starts to say, finally finding his voice, but Seonghwa cuts him off.
“Actually better yet - I’ll show you,” he says, his back facing Hongjoong and his body towards the pool.
Hongjoong had no idea how Seonghwa could show how he quit the swim team but Hongjoong gains a sudden spike of energy. A strong want for all of this to be over - all this running around in circles avoiding his emotions, all this hurting that he has been doing all because he likes - he likes -
Because he likes Park Seonghwa.
Gosh, was that so hard to admit?
I like him.
I like him.
I like him.
It’s not even a realization. It was more of an admission of feelings that he had stupidly hid from.
Seonghwa leans in towards the pool as if he was ready to submerge himself into the water but before he could Hongjoong strides up to him, his arms wrapping around Seonghwa’s torso tightly and his head burying unto Seonghwa’s back.
Seonghwa freezes at the touch but he doesn’t move away, and Hongjoong takes a deep breath to steady himself.
“I don’t care, I don’t care why you left the swim team, I only used that as an excuse to talk to you again. I told myself that the only reason that I wanted to talk to you was because of the school newspaper but that was just bullshit,” Hongjoong starts to ramble against Seonghwa’s back before he loses the sudden courage he has gained, “I stopped talking to you because I got freaked out about how much I like you. When you smile my chest feels all weird, when you talk to me I never want you to stop, when you’re with me I feel like I want to keep you by my side forever. It freaked me out so I ran away from the feelings the only way I could, by running away from you. But I couldn’t even do that properly because I took the first excuse I got to start talking to you again, and I missed you so much Seonghwa. I like you. I like you a lot. And I am sorry that I was such a prick about it.”
When Hongjoong finally runs out of words, he is breathless. Seonghwa slowly untenses underneath his arms and he moves as if he wants to turn around and face Hongjoong, but Hongjoong tightens his hold on Seonghwa.
“Don’t turn around, I can’t look at you yet,” Hongjoong says firmly, his face feeling like boiling rocks.
“But I really really want to look at you,” Seonghwa says sweetly, and it’s the words that are dripped with honey that causes Hongjoong to let go. Because this is the sweet, amazing, and incredibly undeniably kind Seonghwa that he’s talking to and there’s no reason to be afraid of all.
When Seonghwa turns around and looks at Hongjoong, taking the other’s hands that were previously wrapped around his torso to hold it in his own hands, he stares at Hongjoong so warmly and happily, as if Hongjoong is his very own angel. Like Hongjoong his face is also flushed red, but unlike Hongjoong there is no nervousness in his eyes, only unflinching determination and unbridled happiness.
Then Seonghwa says the last thing Hongjoong expects him to say.
“I like you too Hongjoong,” he says simply as if it was the easiest thing in the world to say.
Hongjoong’s mouth falls open, and his blood rushes to his ears.
“You what now?” Hongjoong asks, flabbergasted and honestly sure that he must not have heard it right, or maybe he is currently hallucinating because there’s no way Park Seonghwa likes him back.
Seonghwa’s mouth forms into a soft smile, “I like you,” he says slowly, enunciating each word, his smile growing brighter with each one.
“What, why?” Hongjoong blurts.
Seonghwa’s face gets adorably puzzled, “What do you mean, why?”
“I just-” Hongjoong stutters, then he stares at Seonghwa who is looking at him ever so earnestly and his breath catches in his throat, “oh you’re serious.”
Seonghwa squeezes Hongjoong’s hands that he's holding, “Of course I am Hongjoong. You’re beautiful, you’re smart, and you’re so incredibly funny and perspective. You’re kind but ruthlessly honest when you need to be. You care so much about so many things. I like it when you laugh at the most ridiculous jokes, I like it when you become a mini tyrant and become bossy. I like your pretty mouth-”
Hongjoong covers Seonghwa’s mouth with his hand to stop him from talking. Hongjoong’s heart is pounding so fast and loudly in his chest that he could barely even think straight. Seonghwa’s words are swirling in his brain, making him feel lightheaded.
“Don’t,” Hongjoong says breathlessly, trying not to think too much about how Seonghwa’s lips feel against his palm, “my heart won’t be able to take it if you continue.”
Seonghwa gently removes Hongjoong’s palm from his mouth, his smile is a bit too smug at the edges, “I have to at least try to beat your adorable confession,” he teases, the corner of his eyes crinkled in mischief.
Before Hongjoong could reply, Seonghwa’s face suddenly gets serious, “Hongjoong I want to tell you why I quit the swim team. I feel like it’s only fair that you know if I were to be yours.”
Hongjoong blushes at the words, be yours, Seonghwa has always had a way with words - a result of all the romantic movies and now a detriment to his heart.
“You don’t need to-” Hongjoong starts to say.
“I want to,” Seonghwa interrupts, “I want you to know.”
Then he lets go of Hongjoong’s hands and falls backwards into the pool.
The sudden action surprises Hongjoong so much that he freezes as the water droplets from the splash attack him. His first thought is to jump after Seonghwa but he shakes that impulse from his head because Hongjoong barely knows how to swim (and Seonghwa is the best swimmer in this school so obviously he doesn’t need saving).
For a few seconds, Seonghwa doesn’t swim up, and Hongjoong begins to worry slightly but then Seonghwa’s head pops out of the water. Looking all picturesque and like something out of a swimming magazine. Seonghwa shakes his head to clear the water and then he smiles up at Hongjoong, his mouth slightly quivering with nervousness.
At first, Hongjoong could not comprehend why Seonghwa would feel nervous.
Then he spots it.
Glittering beautifully underneath the water.
A tail.
A tail?
A tail!
Hongjoong leans in to get a better look and sure enough, it’s a tail that’s attached to Seonghwa’s lower half of his body instead of legs. Not just any tail, a mermaid tail. One that Hongjoong has only seen in movies and tv shows, and in books about fantasy because that is what it’s supposed to be. A fantasy.
But here it is, the tail and its beautiful blue scales shining in the light underneath the water, very much in real life and not in a fantasy.
“You’re a merman,” Hongjoong states, his voice coming out hushed and croaked because what is even is his life that he’s staring at a merman's tail right now.
“Yeah something like that,” Seonghwa answers simply, his voice slightly shaking, “you’re taking this a lot better than I thought you would.”
Is he? Hongjoong supposes he kind of is. He’s not screaming or running for help. He didn't pass out, which is surprising to Hongjoong himself, he would have even expected himself to faint.
But he doesn’t. He doesn’t because it’s still Seonghwa in front of him in the pool, his eyes filled with worry as he gauges Hongjoong’s reaction. It is still just his Seonghwa that’s a merman, half merman or whatever this sudden fishtail makes him to be.
Hongjoong isn't scared, just shocked and very very confused.
Feeling slightly weak in the knees Hongjoong crouches down so he’s more on the same eye level as Seonghwa, “You’re going to have to start explaining,” he says as calmly as he could, “because I feel like my brain is about to burst.”
Seonghwa opens his mouth, closes it, and then opens it again, obviously not knowing where to begin. Though Hongjoong slightly feels at wit ends, he waits patiently watching the way the tail, Seonghwa’s tail, gently swishes in the water, the light hitting it in a way that it makes the blue scales look almost silver at certain angles.
“My parents say it’s a family curse,” Seonghwa finally voices, causing Hongjoong’s attention to snap back up to Seonghwa’s face that’s all wrinkled lines on his forehead and bunched up eyebrows, “the last person that had it was my great great grandparent or something. They said it skipped a couple of generations and landed on me. It was so random. A week ago I touched water and then I got a tail. And now every time I touch water I turn into this” he says, gesturing at his tail, “and I can only turn back to normal once I am completely dry.”
Hongjoong slowly computes Seonghwa’s words, his brain working overtime to process that oh wow this is very much a real thing that is happening to him and Seonghwa is very much a merman whose life is ripped off that one obscure Australian television show that Hongjoong watched years and years ago.
And once Hongjoong was able to digest that information everything else just started falling into place. Seonghwa’s suddenly absurd usage of straws, why he refused to walk out in the rain, why he didn’t come to school when it was still rainy and why he ran off so quickly when Wooyoung accidentally got water all over him.
Why-
“Oh my god, that’s why you quit the swim team!” Hongjoong exclaims, the realization hitting him all at once. For a second he’s glad about how he puzzled that together, then downright miserable because that’s the reason why Seonghwa quit the swim team. A reason that’s so out of Seonghwa’s control and left him with no choice?
Seonghwa smiles warily, “Yeah, something told me I will be disqualified from races for having a fishtail,” he mumbles quietly, his eyes filled with such sorrow that it is ripping Hongjoong’s heart apart.
“Oh Seonghwa,” Hongjoong says, itching to reach out to him but not knowing how, “I’m sorry. I really am.”
Seonghwa swims closer so that he is only inches away from Hongjoong. His mouth holding a small smile despite his eyes telling a different story.
“Mom said it would get better eventually,” Seonghwa tells softly, “soon I won’t be so sensitive to water. The tail will only act up when I’m drenched in water.”
Hongjoong’s mouth lifts slightly and he leans towards Seonghwa, “That’s good,” he says, genuinely happy that Seonghwa would not need to be wary of things like the rain and drinking from a can without a straw.
Seonghwa’s smile lifts into something more real, “You are honestly taking this very very well.”
Hongjoong shrugs, he can keep his head straight at dire times after all, “Well this is much more believable than you liking me back.”
“Hongjoong,” Seonghwa chastises, “I’m honestly surprised that you didn’t know that I liked you sooner. I thought you avoided me because you figured it out.”
Oh. Well, that’s…
Hongjoong gulps, “That wasn’t the case at all, in fact, it was very much the opposite case.”
Seonghwa chuckles, and his tail swishes underneath the water, “Well yeah I know that now. We make quite a ridiculous pair don’t we?”
Hongjoong snorts, his eyes being caught by the tail again, before he could even think about it he blurts, “Can I touch your tail?” Then he winches because Seonghwa is not a zoo animal to be prodded and touched.
Seonghwa, surprisingly, is not disgruntled by the question at all, only slightly amused.
“You can,” Seonghwa says gently, and then he swishes his tail so that it is closer to Hongjoong.
Feeling slightly warm at the neck due to his abrupt request, Hongjoong figures it is too late to take it back anyway and shuffles forward so he’s teetering at the edge of the pool. He extends his hand so his fingers gently graze the tail.
The scales are cool to touch, almost like cold metal and when Hongjoong’s fingers graze through them their edges are sharp, but in a way that is pleasing and not at all hurtful. Upon a closer look, the blue of the scales is a much more beautiful colour, a gem-like blue that is almost borderline turquoise. The colour of the scales put even the bright chlorine blue of the swimming pool to shame.
Hongjoong is thoroughly fascinated by it and he finds himself skimming his fingers on it multiple times until he feels the tail twitch underneath his fingertips.
“Hongjoong,” Seonghwa calls out to him, his voice octaves deeper than Hongjoong has ever heard it be.
Hongjoong flits back to Seonghwa to find the other gazing at him, his eyes slightly hooded and his cheeks flushed thoroughly. Hongjoong removes his hand like he’s been burnt by a hot wire as he mumbles an apology.
“Don’t be sorry,” Seonghwa says thickly, looking down at the water as if there was something interesting in the pool.
Hongjoong feels hot all over, the tension between them stresses like taffy and to say something, anything, Hongjoong blurts the first thing that has been at the back of his mind.
“You know I would never tell anyone about this,” Hongjoong tells Seonghwa firmly, “I would never put this in the newspaper.”
Seonghwa looks back up at Hongjoong and blinks at the sudden change in topic, “I know,” he states, “but I would let you.”
Hongjoong scrunches up his nose, “Why?” he asks because that doesn’t make any sense. If people know that Seonghwa could turn into a merman the tamest thing that would happen to him would be being sent to a laboratory to be experimented on.
Seonghwa clears his throat, looking slightly embarrassed, “Well you have always wanted to have a big break to kick off your journalism career-”
“Oh Seonghwa you’re so ridiculous,” Hongjoong interrupts, not even wanting to hear the rest because of how dumbfounded he is with Seonghwa’s line of thinking.
“I know, but when it comes to you I become so irrational,” Seonghwa admits honesty, looking slightly sheepish.
“I won’t tell anyone,” Hongjoong reiterates as his heart squeezes in his chest, because though he thinks Seonghwa is crazy for entertaining the idea he can’t help but be absolutely floored that Seonghwa would even consider something like that, that he even remembers Hongjoong telling him once late night on the phone about his aspirations and dreams.
Unable to help himself any longer Hongjoong reaches over to gently brush his thumb against Seonghwa’s cool cheek. Seonghwa leans into the touch and Hongjoong couldn’t help but gravitate toward him.
He leans forward and Seonghwa meets him halfway.
Their lips touch, a light feather graze but Hongjoong could still feel how soft Seonghwa’s cold lips are on top of his burning ones. They only meet for a second but Hongjoong’s heart speeds, and when Seonghwa leans back he gazes at Hongjoong so lovingly that Hongjoong wants - no he needs the moment to be melded into his brain forever.
“Can’t believe my boyfriend is a merman,” Hongjoong breathes.
Seonghwa laughs, the sounds of it like a twinkling melody, “Can this merman boyfriend of yours take you out for dinner?” he asks charmingly, his eyes wide and clear with adoration.
Hongjoong grins, “He can,” he says sweetly right before he leans in to meet Seonghwa in the middle again.