Chapter Text
“You can leave me alone now!” Jimmy shouted, as he started to walk away faster and faster, preparing a rocket with one hand. It was quite difficult, mind you, with the way his hands trembled.
Sausage laughed behind him, as he followed his rhythm with no problem. “I promised I would protect you! What if you get in harm’s way? What if you die?”
If he didn’t believe that Sausage’s plan was to kill him for the crown the second he caught him alone, without his allies to help him, or anyone to take advantage of his hard work, Jimmy would feel insulted. But context given, it felt threatening. “You’re dismissed, then! Consider this your lunch break. Go have lunch!”
Finally, finally, Jimmy manages to light the rocket in his hand, and fly away.
The mountains disappear behind him, as he starts to gaze his swamps on the distance. It seems like the Gods are smiling on him today, because he doesn’t hear another rocket light up. Sausage stays in Rivendale, and finally Jimmy can start to relax.
It had been a day, alright. When Scott had invited the regents to celebrate the defeat of Xornoth, the last thing anyone had expected was for it to end in a bloodbath. After fWhip had taken out the crown, everybody’s hands had gone to their swords, even Jimmy’s. Surely, he hadn’t expected to actually come on top. But every dog has got its day, and apparently for the cod, the moment finally came.
Putting the crown on his head had been the best feeling in his life, and also the most terrifying one. The way power seemed to bathe him, making him shudder. It felt like getting back into the ocean, but an ocean that was alive, had a thousand eyes with all of them looking at him, ready to listen to what he had to say.
He had thought the power was supposed to be symbolic, a way to make amendments after everything that happened in Server. But then again it was fWhip they were talking about. Of course, he wouldn’t be content with symbolism. One day, the man would probably end a war, and destroy the world the next day while celebrating the peace.
Jimmy doesn’t know if there is a way to harness the power, but he’s not looking to find out. It had been enough drama for him in the last few months to last a lifetime.
The reason it had also been terrifying was the way the rest of the rulers had looked at him, almost like he was a piece of diamond at the bottom of a ravine. It was only the fact that they all held themselves at some standard of honor, and killing the cod father, after he had rightfully defeated them in battle, did not fit in it.
But that mercy would not last forever, and after a while he was going to be free game.
As he retreated, after making his rule known, he tried not to think about how in fox hunting the hunters always gave the animal an advantage.
And just when he thought he was going to make it, Sausage stepped in, with proclamations about how he didn’t think he was fit for the crown, and how he swore to protect the crowned.
Absolutely no one believed him.
They weren’t stupid, dammit. The only thing they agreed on was that Sausage having the crown was probably the worst idea anyone could think about. Him admitting that however felt incredibly suspicious.
As he had said, he was just glad that he got to get away.
The best part was arriving to his empire and getting to tell his people about the crown, and how he had won it. He enjoyed the few minutes he had with his people before the Council gathered and they had to actually plan how to go along with this. But until those old fishes got up and around, he was going to kneel down to let the children take a good look at the crown, would shower in the compliments of the elder, would enjoy the music they started playing in his honor. A woman on his left even started talking about preparations for a celebration.
And during the reunion, if he spent more time trying to discretely eat the candy one of the kids had smuggled to him after he let him touch the crown than actually listening, well. He was there! He heard the important bits, if only because they had repeated them like five time to make sure he remembered. Jimmy had more than fulfilled his duty as emperor for the day.
Besides, he had heard and taken part of the most important topic of them all: the celebration party.
If the Cod Empire was famous for something, it was the sheer number of parties they had during the year. Well, if you asked Jimmy, they weren’t all parties per se. There was the Shoal Dinner at the end of winter, which was more of a formal dinner than a party, as its name indicated, and many allied empires were invited to attend. Then there were the more religious festivities, related to the life cycle of their fish cousins, the simple cod, that took place during the day and were nowhere as fun, so those didn’t count either.
But when the moon was full, or they had a particular good harvest, or any kind of victory, then, in Jimmy’s opinion, they celebrated. And winning the crown? The Crown, to rule above all the other empires? Yeah, it certainly was a matter of celebration. Besides, it wouldn’t be long until his grace period was over and the others would start hunting him down. He wanted to enjoy it while it lasted.
Planks of wood were set in the middle of the main plaza for an improvised dance floor, lights were being hung across the streets. Stalls of candy and drinks and everything you needed to have fun were settled on the sides of the road, and a small stage was up for the bands to play in during the night.
Tonight, the Cod Empire would party.
Jimmy loved it. He helped set things up right from the beginning, and was rewarded with the speed at which his people came, and by the time the sun had set, he doubted there was a single soul in the city sleeping.
Laughs and conversation filled the space, and kids ran around, without a care in the world. Jimmy remembered when he was young, before the empire was truly an empire, and just a couple of huts near the ocean than no empire really wanted to take responsibility over. Little Jimmy would have loved this.
In the back of his mind, he noticed the chatting around him was dying down, until the point that nobody else but him was speaking a word. However, it wasn’t until the musicians stopped playing while mid song that he stopped talking with the lady, and turned around to search for the reason.
It felt like a lighting hit him when his eyes spotted his, body fusing with adrenaline. He had known that he wouldn’t stay away forever, that none of the other emperors would keep their distance for long, but he had hoped for more time.
His hand went to his sword, eyes looking frantically around the crowd for his shield. “Sausage!” he exclaimed.
“Jimmy!” the Mythland king answered, walking towards him without regard for the tension in the air. His sword laid resting on its sheath, ready to be retrieved in a second. He didn’t look particularly menacing, but everyone in the Cod Empire knew the man was quick as a snake. “I didn’t know there was going to be a party, I hope it’s not a bother that I came unannounced. But look! I brought a present! From the finest forges of Mythland”
Sausage extended his arms towards the cod, showing the forementioned present, wrapped in red and green sheets. He stayed where he was, allowing Jimmy to make the decision to approach if he so wanted.
Jimmy did not want to do so.
If there was one thing that had been consistent since he started ruling the swamp, it was that he could not trust that man. Since he had told him that it was okay for Jimmy to take some of his crops, and then gone back on his word, Sausage seemed to take joy in looking for any excuse to antagonize him. The ‘present’? That looked like a trap if Jimmy had ever seen one.
The people around them were waiting to see what the Cod Father would do. If this was to become a fight, citizens had strict orders to go back to their homes and take refuge until the dispute was over. But it would be incredibly rude to finish the celebration at the arrival of the emperor of their neighbor kingdom. Not to mention that the relationship was already strained enough.
Jimmy knew all that. He also knew that he couldn’t afford to send him away unprovoked. He just wished he at least had his trusty shield. It would be pathetic if he were to die at the first strike.
“Hey, Sausage…” Jimmy said after a while of uncomfortable silence, walking towards him. The man had never stopped smiling, and gosh it was creepy. Was it a Mythland thing? “Oh, you shouldn’t have”
The king took it as a signal to go meet him halfway, his energetic steps covering the distance much faster than Jimmy’s reluctant ones. “Of course, I had! Here, open it, open it”
Sausage practically shoved the thing into Jimmy’s arms, much to his alarm. He looked down at the package and then back at the king, trying to read something besides excitement on his expression, and failing to do so. He just stood close, waiting for his reaction.
‘Well, at least it’s not a bomb,’ he thought. There was no way the other would be standing so close if that were the case.
Not a bomb, doesn’t move enough to be a captured baby zombie, too small to be a zoglin. The cod father was discarding options with the pieces of cloth that covered the present. Definitely not some kind of harm potion, if he covered it so much.
By the time he took out the last piece, he had run out of possibilities and was just praying for the best. He could hear the people whispering all around him about what he might have in hand.
It was an iron plate, big and deep, the kind some people here left on their windows to collect water when it rained, or that kids used to keep the stones and shells they might find on the shore. There were twelve cods carved in the center of it, as if they might be swimming, and on the border and all around, a chain design that now and then showed the Mythland’s cross of their stand.
The plate shone in the same way all of the polished iron from the empire did, and Jimmy wondered how could they have made something so beautiful in such a short notice.
Loss of words, Jimmy said the only thing that came through his mind. “This doesn’t count like a sanctuary, you know”
As soon as the words came through his mouth he regretted them, cringing internally. The last thing he needed was to disrespect one of the most powerful people in Server.
Thank the cod, Sausage laughed. “Of course, that’s not it! Oh, Jimmy, I already got so many ideas for the sanctuary, you’re going to love it!” He put his hand on his shoulder, and Jimmy did his best not to duck. “Nah, this is just a present, to congratulate you on winning the crown. You know, I would have thought that you would be one of the firsts to die for sure, but I guess I underestimated you”
If there was something stronger than Jimmy’s fear and self-preservation instincts, it was his pride.
“Guess you were wrong,” he said, in a matter-of-fact voice. Then, realizing he should probably say something about the literal piece of art on his hands, he added: “And thank you, Sausage, this is… This is beautiful. Please, pass my admiration to the artist” That’s how the council had taught him to thank a fellow ruler, and Jimmy could have sworn he could hear them let out a sigh of relief from somewhere among the crowd.
“It would only give him a bigger head than he already has, but sure. It’s not like the man doesn’t deserve it,” the king replied, the words flowing easy and carefree as always, the complete opposite to Jimmy, who had to concentrate to not break some unspoken rule or offend someone every time he opened his mouth.
They stood there for a moment. Sausage took his hands to his pockets and looked around, apparently unaffected by the looks the whole kingdom was giving them.
“So,” he said, after a while. “Can I stay to the party?”
The question broke Jimmy out of his stupor. “Yes! Of course,” but only because I don’t need another war right now, he didn’t add. His kingdom was still recovering from Xornoth destruction.
Jimmy looked around, trying to get the people to move and act normal. Like one of the worst enemies of the kingdom hadn’t suddenly shown up with a gift to try to buy his way in. He spotted the band, and luckily, they were quick to understand, starting to play a new song almost immediately.
The moment the first note of the violin was played, the tension broke up, and everybody seemed to take the clue to go back to chatting and dancing as they were.
Everyone, of course, except Jimmy.
“So…” he started, unsure of what to said.
Luckily for him, having a moment of uncomfortable silence seemed impossible with Sausage. “Do you usually have celebrations like this with such short notice? The people look like they are having so much fun”
He was pointing with his head at the dancing floor, where a few of the citizens were already back at moving and spinning around at the rhythm of the music, if a bit weary still of the man standing a few meters away. The kids were the only ones who seemed to have their hearts and minds totally in it, some spinning until they fell, and others trying to make the most complicated moves to impress their friends.
A couple ran past Jimmy, almost crashing into him, and they screamed their apologies without stopping to look back. They probably wanted to take the best spot in the floor, now that it was almost empty.
The spot Jimmy had been occupying a few moments ago, he remembered with resentment.
Mythland’s king seemed fascinated by them, watching them run with his mouth half opened.
Right, he probably didn’t get many kids crashing into him on the daily basis. And even if anyone dared to run close enough to the king for that to happen, Jimmy bet that they would apologize properly. He wondered if it made him look weak at his eyes, but moments later decided that he didn’t care. He wouldn’t change his relationship with his people for anything in the world.
“I mean, there’s usually a festivity twice a month, or some excuse to throw a party, you know? People here love the music, and why have a music plaza if you’re not going to use it. A good harvest, an exceptional month on the trades, a new ally. Before you finish sharing the news the lights are already up and the musicians competing to get to play at the busiest hours”
It wasn’t a lie. When Jimmy left the council, the smell of fish and sugar already filled the air.
If it were anyone else, the cod father would have said Sausage hummed in admiration. “I know, I remember how much I hated studying the dates of your festivities and their history when I was younger. I had no idea the celebrations were like this, though”
How bad of a ruler should Jimmy feel for being surprised that Sausage had studied their culture before being crowned, and how much should it concern him that he was still having trouble remembering the details of his closest allies?
Jimmy decided not to comment on it.
“What are festivities like in Mythland, then?” he opted instead. A nice, polite question, while he tried to figure out what to do with the ruler.
“Absolutely nothing like this” Sausage replied instantly. “You need to start preparations at least three days before the main event. Most are held at the Church of the Blood Sheep, but the more political take place in a special saloon in the castle. Those last ones are more exclusive, you know, with a list of invites, names on the seats of the tables, all that fuzz. Still, none of them are this… this… joyful” he tells, lifting a hand to point at the people laughing near them. “At least, not the ones I’m involved in. Those would take place down in the town, or even in the fields”
The cod tried not to feel like he was being treated as a lesser, but it was hard. Of course, Sausage lived in a castle, in a hill, up and away from the common people. Meanwhile and a few meters over, the only sign Jimmy’s house was the one of the emperors was the fact that it was the only one in the shore with a deck of its own, and that was about to change when Penny finished building hers.
“And you don’t go to those?”
Sausage had the audacity to laugh. “No, no, I don’t think my counselors could take it”
Jimmy could feel his patient wearing thinner and thinner. And so, out of nowhere: “What are you doing here, Sausage?” he finally asked him.
It was almost sad to watch the face of the ever-smiling man quiver for a moment, before going back to his happy expression. “What do you mean what am I doing here?” Sausage teased him, pushing him lightly on the side with his shoulder. “I said I would protect you as the wearer of the Crown. I’m not leaving you alone here, where enemies can appear from nowhere. Nobody stopped me from entering a few moments earlier, or coming near, do you know how easy it would have been to kill you?” How did Sausage manage to talk about killing him to his face and do so in such a politically correct way? “What if it had been fWhip, or Scott-?”
“Scott wouldn’t kill me,” Jimmy interrupted him.
The ruler pressed his lips, as if wanting to say something else, but let it go. “Still, you should be more careful, Jims” He tried to put an arm around his shoulders, but Jimmy stopped it as soon as he started. Enough was enough.
“Don’t call me that,” he said, patience wearing thin. “And you want to, what, stay with me the whole day?”
He really should have been more careful with his words.
“I would love to! Oh, thank you so much, Jimmy!” His face lit up in excitement, and Jimmy realized too late what he had done. “Is that sugar glass?” Sausage asked, and ran to the improvised candy shop a few meters away before he had a chance to rectify his words.
“Wha- No!”
It took Jimmy a moment to react, and start following him. But when he was just about to get to him, a group of kids ran right in between them, forcing the cod to back down or else be thrown to the floor by the stampede. When he raised his eyes, the king was already on the other side of the dance floor, apparently distracted by the ornaments hanging above him.
He hands the plate on his hands to a servant he barely stops to ask to save it for him, and practically runs towards the man.
Jimmy doesn’t know exactly how long they kept at it, Jimmy almost reaching him, and Sausage disappearing just at the right time to be able to claim (falsely, of course) that oh, he had no idea Jimmy was looking for him, why didn’t he call? He did? Gods above, he must not have heard, I’m so sorry Jimmy.
He gets tired of it quickly. It was obvious that it was just a game for the Mythlander, and Jimmy was not interested in playing. What was he going to do, anyway? It’s not like many of the people around them spoke common, and there was no way he could mingle with his people. The cod would just keep an eye on him from the distance, and enjoy the party, as he had originally intended.
To the Nether with his dumb games, and to the Nether with Sausage.
What was his deal, anyway?
A month ago, he had murdered Jimmy in cold blood, laughed at the way he cowered in fear. Sure, that had all been under the influence of the demon, but it wasn’t like they had been the best of friends before. And Cod knew that man never threw a rod without having a campfire to cook the fish.
It’s not like Jimmy had much to offer. His strength laid on his allies and his slime. And now the crown, he supposed. He doesn’t know how dumb Sausage thinks he is, but he is losing his time if he believes that following him around for a few days was enough to win his trust.
Though think about it, the king had been awfully nice lately. Everybody had heard about how he spent days with Grimlands’ workers to conquer the inside of the southern mountains, tough Jimmy was pretty sure Mythland owed them. Truth be told, he could have just sent someone in his name, or just provide the materials needed. Jimmy knows he would go mad if he had to spend so long placing torches everywhere, with enemies attacking from all sides.
Then, there was his offer to build a bridge between their empires. Though it had been tempting, if only for the economics side, having a direct pass way between him and the kingdom who had once unleashed a demon to their lands was too much of a risk for him.
Whatever. It didn’t matter, he told himself.
Well, it did matter, but not tonight. Tonight was a night of celebration, and he was going to have a good time.
Which remined him of. He needed a drink.
It has been a while since he kept track of what Sausage was doing, and even longer since he cared about it. Instead, his new interest was now getting to the end of the line where Joseph was serving Honey Milk. He had been waiting for a good while, and he could almost taste the little straw on his mouth.
“What’s this line for?”
Jimmy does not jump. Instead, he reacts properly at being shouted in the ear with the most annoying voice Server has known. Just when he thought he had gotten rid of him.
“Sausage!” he complains, stepping to the side to create a bit of distance in between them. “Could you not?”
The king looks at him confused, feigning innocence. “Not what? Is this like an offerings line? I don’t want to go to the end, this is really long”
If there’s one thing Jimmy is sure, is that he does not want to know what an offering line is. “They are serving Honey Milk here” he decides to answer instead.
“Oh, I never had one of those,” Sausage comments, and instead of going away, he stands right beside Jimmy, not seeing anything wrong with it. “Not that I’m not having fun, but how long do your parties usually last? I have to admit I’m not used to staying up so late. I feel like the sun is about to rise any moment now”
For what felt like the first time since Sausage crashed the party, Jimmy couldn’t contain the smile that formed on his lips. It was nice to have the upper hand for once, even if it was on something so dumb as being able to stay up the longest.
“That’s because it is,” the cod informed, pointing at the horizon. There, in between the leaves of the trees, the sky looked slightly clearer, and the stars were less visible. “Usually, we stay up and celebrating until the work hours, and then everyone just starts with their job.” Sausage’s face almost makes up for all the bothers Jimmy went through that night.
“It’s just easier that way, you know?” he can’t resist to add, smugly. “Why, is that a little too much for you, mythlanders?”
Jimmy’s hoping for a quarrel, like they always do. Instead, Sausage whistles, almost in… admiration? “Definitely. And then you head to work? Man, I can’t imagine”
Talking with Sausage, without feeling like he was making fun of him, was definitely a new experience. Jimmy decided to blame it on the high hours of the night, and not dwell too much about it. “I mean, tomorrow is definitely going to be a slow day, but I guess we’re just used to it here”
The king opens his mouth, but whatever he was going to say gets cut short when the couple before them gets their drinks, and it’s their turn.
Joseph greets them with a big smile. “Jimmy! And your majesty,” he politely adds at Sausage, before turning around. “I’ll get you your drinks right now”
They are left alone once more, as the man goes to pick them.
Of course, the silence doesn’t last. “These things don’t have bamboo, do they? I’m allergic”
Jimmy wishes they had. “Nop,” he answers instead.
After that, Joseph appears, handing each one a wooden ball with a small straw poking from a hole on top. They moved to let the line advance, Jimmy happily taking a sip without a second thought. Sausage gave it a look, trying to peak through the little hole of the liquid inside, to no avail. Smelling it didn’t seem to help either. He gave Jimmy a suspicious look, only to find him staring at his antics in amusement.
Finally, Sausage bit the bullet and took a sip.
You could see the exact moment the king decided he liked it, by the way his face illuminated. “This is amazing!” he exclaimed, taking an even bigger sip, and Jimmy laughed at the way the man’s cheek filled with Honey Milk.
“I knew you would like it,” the cod said, because it was true. You could practically smell the guy’s sweet teeth a mile away.
He didn’t realize they were walking away from the main plaza, and towards a less concurred area. If Jimmy had to guess, he would say the tiredness with which the king walked besides him had something to do.
But he wouldn’t complain. Actually, it seemed like the perfect opportunity to ask him the so dreaded question. “Sausage, why are you really here?”
“What do you mean?” he tried to play dumb. “Is this area off limits? There are still people around” Sausage looked to his sides, his gaze resting now and then at the citizens that crossed their path.
“You know what I mean,” the cod accused. “Why did you come to the Codlands?”
The Mythland king took another sip from the now definitely empty drink, considering his answer. He kept at it, until his lungs were full and Jimmy looked like he was going to punch his Honey Milk away from him. “Well, Joey did try to murder you for the crown on your way here from the feast, and everybody believes someone is going to take it from you in less than a day, so it’s pretty much a race to kill you right now”
Jimmy coughed the drops of Honey Milk that had gone through the wrong hole, stopping dead in the middle of the road. A few citizens watched him struggle, and even Sausage looked at him with concern, before he managed to save himself.
“I didn’t know that!” he tries to justify his reaction. He’s got all the rights in the world to have such, he found out he’s being hunted like a fox right then. He knew the crown put pretty much a target on his head, but for Cod’s sake, he hoped they would wait a tiny bit more.
Sausage did not mind Jimmy’s distress, instead taking the chance to steal the still filled beverage from the cod’s hands, and taking a sip from his prize. “Guess you appreciate this whole protection thing I’m doing for you a bit more, uh?” he teases.
He falls not for his antics, taking back what’s rightfully his. “This is mine! If you want more go and make the line.” First things first, after all. Then, in a more serious tone, “but really, why? What do you win out of all this? You’re not getting any favors, mind you, and you said you didn’t want the crown. What is this supposed to be, your redemption arc?”
The Mythland’s king laughed, but it was different this time. It wasn’t the usual, all upbeat and maybe a little too smug laugh Jimmy had learnt to associate with the man. He didn’t even look at his face, and the smile didn’t reach his eyes. And even then, it was way too happy for his next words.
“Oh, Jimmy, there’s no redemption for me,” he said with a smile, finally turning when the cod offered no comment. “I’m not that stupid. When I die, die for good, my people will do their best to erase my name and face from everything but history books. There will be no funeral, they’ll hang my body like a pig and bled, my blood thrown to the river like garbage and my corpse buried in a nameless tomb”
Well.
Fuck.
Jimmy wanted nothing more than a creeper to explode right next to them and respawn him out of the conversation.
Cod help him, what was he supposed to do with this?
“Sorry, sorry, I know how it sounds.” He definitely Did Not, if he kept talking with a smile, as if they were picking flowers instead of talking of his future corpse desecration, in Jimmy’s humble opinion. “It’s not a big deal, really. I already made peace with it. But now you know I’m not trying to erase the past. Or try any dirty tricks! Nop, sleeves empty, see?”
He made a big show of pulling up his sleeves, and showing his arms for the cod to see. It was obvious that he was trying to light the air. Maybe it would have worked if they weren’t so full of scars, but that’s the life of a Mythlander for you.
“Yeah, I… I see” Jimmy laughed uncomfortably.
“Oh, come on,” Sausage throws an arm over Jimmy’s shoulder, shaking him up a bit. The cod never let his awkward smile die. “I don’t want to drown the party, I’m sorry. Lesson learnt”
He was not good with serious situations.
Jimmy recognized a chance to get out. “Yeah, the party is almost over anyway, you know? Sun is rising and all”. Thank Cod, the sun was actually rising as he spoke. “And I’m probably going to head to bed, catch a few hours of sleep and all. Emperor’s privileges and all. You should probably do the same”
Please please please.
He let his shoulders go, looking at the sunrise. “You’re right, I should provably head home, prepare for my next shift,” he told him, as he took a few steps back and looked for a firework to light on his belt. “This was fun! We should do the same some other time, but see you tomorrow! Today!”
The king said those last words just before he rose to the air, not giving Jimmy a chance to reply.
“Today?” he asked to no one.