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It started as a joke. Felix read the chat before his brain could catch up to the words, as it was currently busy trying to carry his entire fucking team, come on, you can’t be this bad unless it’s on purpose.
“Wear a skirt for us?—oh, fuck off, I can’t believe you missed that shot, dude.”
“My bad,” came Jisung’s tinny voice through the headphones. He seemed to be crunching chips as he spoke, which didn’t surprise anyone but was still as annoying as always. “Wait, what did you say?”
Felix took a sip of his soda—a regular Fanta, not all of us live, breathe and piss Monster, Jisung—and frowned. “Huh?”
Whatever Jisung meant to reply got lost in the choir of disappointed groans in the call as the round ended. Only then Felix became aware of the incessant pinging and rattling of the stream; he was proud of how much he’d grown his channel in the past months, but he definitely hadn’t reached the level where he could get flooded with subs and donations, not yet, not to the point where it would sound like it did now.
For a second or two, Felix only stared at the chat. “Why is everyone saying—” he muttered, “oh! There was a comment saying I should wear a skirt, yeah!”
Jisung snorted. “Well they better pay you if they start making demands like that.”
Felix was already choosing his champion for the next round. “Wouldn’t it be funny if someone actually paid, though?”
“Do you even own skirts, dude?” Changbin chimed in.
“Jesus, you scared me, I’d forgotten you were even in the game,” Felix said.
Even without looking at Changbin’s cam, he could tell he was pouting. “This is hard, okay? There are so many things happening in the screen right now.”
“Chat, please explain to this himbo that some games require to display more info than Candy Crush, please.”
“Don’t you dare slander Candy Crush!”
Felix had a reply ready, but the round had already started. It was only by chance that he caught the donation when it happened; the numbers in the chat probably were enough to grab his attention. “Oh, thank you so much for the ten bucks, Wolfie97, holy shit! Okay, wear the skirt now—oh, my God.”
Jisung screeched in his ear and promptly got himself killed. “What?”
“I—well,” Felix started. For some reason, his heart was beating faster, fast enough to be felt in his chest. “Well, it seems like someone did it.”
“Ten bucks!” Changbin gasped. He had long ago gotten killed as well, and Felix was finding it harder and harder to work his way through the horde of the other team. “Dude, nice.”
Felix laughed unsteadily. Suddenly he was hyper-aware of his body and how he essentially hadn’t moved in three hours—his asscheeks were uncomfortably numb and the headphones were hot and heavy on his skin. Winning the round took a backseat against whatever the hell was happening in the stream. “Well, a promise is a promise, isn’t it?” He couldn’t remember if he had promised, or just joked about it, or—
Another ping. Felix looked at his second screen and his eyes widened like dinner plates. The same name, Wolfie97, a gift of $50, fifty dollars, holy shit, and an even shorter message.
“Wear it… now,” Felix read, his tongue heavy in his mouth. Jisung’s cackles were a dim, muted sound.
“Oh, wow, this guy is serious,” Changbin said with a surprised whistle.
“Shut up, I don’t—”
“Do it,” Jisung said. “Buy one, I dare you.”
Fuck off, Felix wanted to say, but he found that he couldn’t. His brain was busy thinking of what the sixty bucks would buy him, and how easily the faceless donor had parted with them. And then, there was—
“I have one,” he blurted out.
The match had ended long ago, but suddenly the chat was more active than ever. The shocked emotes flew past along with keysmashes, but Felix could still read most of it.
I knew he was a bit of a femboy!!!
Do you have cat ears 2
His face has always been too pretty to waste
Against his will, Felix blushed. He wasn’t ignorant of the image some of his viewers had of him; even if he never did anything beyond playing League hunched in his dim room, he had already read his fair share of praise for his deep voice, his freckles, his dick sucking lips.
He mumbled some of the comments out loud, most definitely ignoring Changbin and Jisung’s excited babbling. He didn’t realize what he had been searching for until the message popped out, followed by the loud ding that Felix thought he could definitely get used to.
$100. A single word.
Please.
Hysteria took over Felix for a dizzying second. Sue him, he might be a materialist after all.
There was something else in the back of his mind as he dug into the mess of wrinkly clothes that was his closet, but he was already too wired on adrenaline to pay attention to it. For a moment he feared he had somehow misremembered, that the half-drunk purchase and subsequent shameful rush to hide it had been a dream, but it didn’t last long.
Jisung screeched. “Is that—?”
“Shut up.”
“Oh, my God, it is.”
Felix hid his burning face behind the skirt he was holding, before realizing that the movement betrayed him. It was fully on display now, barely enough fabric to go down his ass, pink and soft all over. He knew it too well from breathless, hidden try-ons in the safety of his bedroom, but he’d never realized just how racy the design was until now.
Changbin was loud in his ear, through the cat ear headphones that Felix had bought ironically. Ironically. “How long have you owned that? Damn.”
“Just—it kind of—” Felix couldn’t find his voice through the stammering. “Fuck it, I’ll be back.”
He tripped on his own feet once or twice, but he made it to the bathroom and back without further injury. The process of slipping the skirt on and feeling his bare skin burst into goosebumps had his thoughts float a bit further from reach, drunk in the rush of seeing himself in the mirror, but it didn’t get any better once he had perfunctorily twirled for the chat and sat back down.
“Happy?”
For a moment, nobody spoke. Felix wondered if his headphones had lost connection in the process, but then all sounds were bursting in at once. He made out something about bro, your legs, holy shit, and where did you even get that from?
The chat jingled and pinged like a damn soundtrack for his friends’ shocked whooping, and Felix only had to glance at it to calculate that he suddenly had enough to pay rent for at least two months in advance. He giggled, increasingly convinced that he had died and gone to a very weird version of heaven, and did what he did best—opening his mouth and talking without knowing where the next thought would come from.
“Did you like that, chat? I mean, it’s kinda wrinkly, I bet it would look better if I ironed it—oh, yes, I could wear a wig with it too! I don’t have a wig though.” He frowned. “I just happened to have this lying around, it’s not like I have a full crossdressing closet out there! That would be crazy, wouldn’t it? Oh, knee socks—”
“Dude,” Jisung said, almost reverently. “You gotta.”
“What, the wig?” Felix focused on choosing his next champion, and laughed again when he realized that the camera angle gave everyone a full view of the skirt and how dangerously high it rode when he sat down. “Well, I’d have to get them to pay for it.”
“Fair enough,” Changbin said, and he sounded impressed. “I can’t believe you didn’t tell us, though.”
“If I had known you would all react like that I would’ve definitely told you! Choose your champion, come on.” He reflexively tried to cross his feet under his thighs, before realizing that the exposure would more than likely get him banned from the stream. “But yeah, chat, definitely pool in for a wig if you want one.”
He was riding half on manic energy, half on the suspicion that everything was a big joke being played on him, to the point where he almost missed the comment when it came. He would only later go up the chat and confirm that Wolfie97 had only joined his stream for the first time that night, and that he only bothered to interact through his ridiculous donations.
The last one, after which Felix stammered a goodbye to the chat and found himself lying on his bed, skirt still on, heart beating wildly against his ribs, was five hundred dollars and the name of a specific wig.
He would text the group chat later to apologize for leaving the game so suddenly, he told himself. He might wake up to find out his brain had concocted the entire episode after overdoing it with the melatonin. Wolfie97 was stuck in his head like a pop earworm, building fantasies upon fantasies about him—rich, but barely older than Felix himself, but willing to watch some obscure League stream.
And the single word please, going around and around Felix’s brain until he was exhausted. He managed to bookmark the exact wig that had been mentioned before sleep tugged his eyelids closed, offering him fantasies of pink and lace.
The line between a joke and something more serious was never properly drawn; if anything, it was a blurry mess that Felix preferred to keep unlabeled and sealed tightly among shameful nights of sticky cum on his growing collection of skirts. He had assumed that the mysterious donor would fade back into nothing after getting what he wanted, but he couldn’t have been furthest from the truth. Wolfie97 was either a bank robber or a spoiled rotten, wealthy man, if the ease with which he sent money Felix’s way was anything to go by. He didn’t miss a stream.
And with the money, the demands piled up.
Felix’s friends found it hilarious, as they added their own cents to the pile and came up with donation goals by themselves. First it was the wig, that turned out to be the kind with a lace front that needed to be trimmed into shape and that Felix spent an hour fiddling with. “It itches,” he whined to the chat, still not used to the amount of viewers he saw in it lately. “Goddamnit, I’d rather grow my own hair out than wear this every day.”
As if he’d been waiting for it, Wolfie replied with a donation of his own. I would love to see that.
Felix had never let his hair grow past his shoulders, even if he’d fantasized about it after one too many dreams where he wore pigtails and loved it. He figured there was a first time for everything.
“You look so sexy,” he read from the chat a couple of weeks later, twirling his hair around his finger. “Aw, thank you, that’s cute!” Somewhere along the process he’d stopped playing and had started focusing on the chat, pouring his eyes over the tiny font to find a familiar username. “I would love to see you in a cock cag—oh?”
The tiny rusted cogs that he called a brain screeched to a halt. Fuck, he was blushing. “Well, that’s very nice! I mean—not that I would—not that I have anything against it! I think they’re pretty cool—cool?—I just don’t think it’s something I would do?” His voice rose hesitantly at the last word. He wasn’t sure of anything anymore; he wasn’t sure what his life had become, certainly not what he had expected when he’d opened his Twitch account to stream Minecraft for two or three friends, but he also wasn’t sure he disliked it.
“Make a goal for it? Yeah, right,” he laughed. A glance towards the progress bar in the corner of the screen that read GIRL DAY in cutesy font told him that he was surprisingly close to the goal. “Maybe after girl day!”
Twenty-four hours of dressing up as whatever this was didn’t sound so bad. If anything, he was looking forward to it. He’d already picked his best outfit, and the fact that he now had a sizable closet to choose from thanks to PO box gifts from his subscribers and the items he’d himself purchased out of a sudden need to look as stereotypically girly as possible only made him giddier. He’d wear a tiny hot pink miniskirt along with thigh-high socks that had been a staple of his streams since then, and he only had to choose what shirt to go with.
He’d only gotten more comfortable with everything else that came with it, too; after a suggestion from Wolfie he’d gotten himself a couple of eyeshadow palettes and a liquid eyeliner that he still sucked at applying. He usually did it on camera, too, as not only it made for good viewing content but also made him shiver with pride when the chat complimented him for it.
I knew you had the perfect eye shape for the eyeliner.
Shit, you’re the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen.
I’m jerking off to u rn
[USER HAS BEEN BANNED]
Show us your boobs!
The last message made Felix laugh. “Chat, if there’s one thing I absolutely do not have is boobs. I am as flat-chested as they come, okay? Sorry!” he added with a snort, seeing the disappointed reactions roll in.
“You should still wear a bra, though? Well, maybe? I’ve never tried—would they even make one that fit me?”
The box arrived two days later. Afterwards, Felix would consider himself lucky that he’d waited until he was alone to open it; he didn’t think he would’ve been able to control the gasp that left his mouth when he saw the silicone breastplate inside.
“Shit,” he whispered. The material was soft to the touch, not giving as easily as flesh would’ve, but still warm. It made butterflies take flight in Felix’s guts.
The new addition had more of a reaction than he’d expected, and he’d expected a lot. His audience had grown exponentially, which terrified him a little when he thought about it, and as he stepped into the camera and, on a last minute decision, unbuttoned an extra button on the flimsy white shirt to reveal his cleavage, he couldn’t help smiling.
“Hey, everyone,” he said. The sultry tone that slipped into his voice was an unexpected, but welcome addition. He couldn’t deny that he got a rush out of the adoration that poured through the chat; hell, he couldn’t deny the tingle that ran down his spine whenever he read the stray pretty slut among the comments. He stretched lazily. “Yeah, do you like them? Wolfie got them for me!”
The now familiar tinkle of the donation soundbite took barely seconds to arrive. Felix read Wolfie’s message and was suddenly very thankful that the loose skirt he was wearing was enough to hide that he was getting hard.
“Thank me properly,” he read dutifully. He knew exactly what he had to do.
“Thank you, daddy.”
“Have I met Wolfie in real life? Nah.”
Felix clinked his brand new nails against the table. Maybe he should start an ASMR channel, he thought fleetingly; as with most things he’d gotten himself into since the start of the whole girl thing, he hadn’t expected to like fake nails as much as he did. “Yeah, it hasn’t come up yet. He seems to be busy enough.”
He kept his deeper thoughts hidden, of course. A chat of thousand strangers didn’t need to know about his late night fantasies where he got to see Wolfie’s face when he heard Felix’s daddy in real life. They didn’t need to know that Felix had resorted to tucking his dick into his boxers before streaming, afraid of revealing just how much Wolfie’s words and money affected him.
They for sure didn’t need to know that one of his most well-loved gifts was a pink buttplug with a pretty jewel on the base, that he hadn’t dared to wear it during a stream, but that he was more and more tempted each day.
“Maybe one day, yeah!” he added. “Maybe after girl month, who knows?”
By a twist of fate, it happened right on the second he wasn’t watching the progress bar. He had accidentally launched into a ramble about how the more he crossdressed the more the lines of gender blurred for him, and how he couldn’t understand people who tried to put people’s aesthetics and gender in rigid boxes, and it took him a second to realize that the chat was virtually screaming at him.
“Uh,” he said, intelligently.
Can’t wait to see you wear all my gifts<3
Over two thousand dollars. Exactly the amount needed to go over the limit—”and keep the 69 cents difference,” Felix laughed, feeling slightly maniac. “Fucking hell.”
By now, his viewers were more than attuned to the dynamics of the girl streams. Felix scanned over them and nodded, blushing slightly despite himself. “Yes, I gotta thank him properly, of course!”
The joke had faded against the background, and, whoever Wolfie was, Felix was ready to do anything for him.
He looked up to the camera shyly and batted his eyelids in his best imitation of coyness. “Thank you, daddy, thank you for the donations.” Heat unfurled in his chest as he did.
He had a month ahead of him, and all he’d have to do would be look pretty and get paid for it. He discretely fixed the breastplate to show the tits best and smiled. “Okay, let’s play some fucking Minecraft!”