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Tommy wouldn't consider Phil his dad anymore. Phil’s relationship with his sons started deteriorating the day after the crash, they figured it was just because he was grieving. But Tommy was grieving too, along with Wilbur, and while they loved each other a lot, they both needed a father.
Unfortunately for them, they didn't get that. But they lived with it, and because of it their brother bond was stronger than before. But the problem arose when Phil didn't stop, he worked all day and on the days he wasn't working he was out of the house doing god knows what. All the boys knew was that they hadn't had a meaningful conversation with their father in close to 3 months.
It had been 6 since their mother died, and Tommy still felt the loss every day, he was 13 at the time, 14 now, and he was definitely closer to his mom. But that wasn't to say he wasn't close with his dad, they were incredibly close, but not close enough to be worth the trouble, he guessed.
Phil leaving Wilbur was somewhat of a surprise, because they were always awfully close. Tommy knew it hurt his brother a lot when his dad stopped trying to be around them, he knew because he was the one who would comfort him when he was crying. He knew that what Wilbur really needed was his dad, or his mom but that was even more impossible. So instead it was Tommy who helped him with breathing exercises at 3 in morning, and Wilbur did the same for him when he woke up crying for his mom.
It was a hard 6 months but they were never lonely because the boys had each other. But then Wilbur had to leave. He had tried out for a band about a year ago and with graduating high school it was finally time to leave and start making music with them. Tommy was, understandably, devastated, but his brother spent his last week at home hanging out with Tommy non-stop and making sure the boy knew he was loved.
And when he left it was hard, Tommy was alone in his home but not in his life. He had his best friends Tubbo and Ranboo, and since it was summer they were all hanging out around every other day. Wilbur and him texted every day, and they called around 3 times a week, mostly because with the band just starting up they spent a lot of time getting to know each other and figuring out what kinds of songs they wanted to write. (I don't know how bands work so just like- imagine okay? okay.)
The summer felt short. It was a fun summer filled with messing around with his friends and staying out of his house as much as possible. He even met some new friends, Purpled, Amy, and Bill. Though they were mostly Tubbo and Ranboos friends, they were still fun to be around and he had a good time hanging out with them whenever they were around.
When the summer came to an end and school started, Tommy felt the school work piling on slowly, but he just couldn't bring himself to try. Wilbur's band had been getting more popular over the summer and they even had their first show that more than 100 people were attending. Which was great, and Tommy was happy for him, but all this also meant that he couldn't talk as much and honestly? Tommy felt like he was sinking into a pool of quicksand, but it was like when you were a kid and were told not to panic, so instead of trying to get out he waited, waited for someone to help him out.
And for a while, there was Tubbo, and for a while there was Ranboo, for a little bit there was even purpled, but he had joined the football team and found a new group of friends. Which was fine! He still had Tubbo! Tubbo was his rock, his best friend in the whole world, all up until he just, wasn't.
It wasn’t a quick change, it started with the three of them moving tables, they sat with a lot more people like Freddie, and his friend group, which was made of about 6 people before they joined. This included Bill and Amy. Tommy wasn't a fan of big groups, too overwhelming, but he was willing to make the change for his best friends. He had already been feeling like a problem recently with all the ranting he had been doing, so he didn’t want to bother them anymore then he already had.
But eventually he had to start rushing to the table to actually be able to get a seat. If he didn't rush he wouldn't be able to fit, he didn't want to think it was on purpose that Tubbo stopped saving a seat for him. So he didn't, until one day when he was sitting with them Bill mentioned a video he sent to the group chat, and Tubbo had quickly shushed him. But the reality was the damage was already done.
When Tubbo turned to look at Tommy he said something along the lines of being able to add Tommy to it if he wanted, Tommy just brushed it off and said it wasn’t a big deal.
Really though, at that very moment he felt the only 2 arms that were keeping him from sinking incredibly deeper into the quicksand pit he was stuck in, evaporate.
When he walked home that day (alone. it used to be with his 2 best friends but that stopped a long time ago.) his mind would not shut up. He hasn't talked to Wilbur in about 3 weeks, the man had been very busy practicing with his band for the show they had soon and Tommy couldn't bring himself to text first in fear of being a distraction.
So without his friends and without his brother he felt so utterly alone.
He lost both his parents in one fell swoop and now he doesn't have anyone left to distract him from how empty his house really was. Maybe Phil would come home, maybe they would have their first conversation in over a week and it would be an okay night instead of a terrible one.
So at home when he went to his room and got his homework out, trying his best to get any semblance of work done, he couldn't stop himself from glancing at the clock on his phone too often for it to be normal. But it didn't matter how much he looked at his phone, his brother didn't text and Phil didn’t come home.
Tommy didn’t cry that night, or any night after that, he would sit on his own in the library at lunch. But he didn’t eat, no food allowed in the library.
When he would get home he would drown any sort of thoughts in school work, he even got his grades up a little bit because of it, not that he had the energy to be proud, or even care at all.
His life was sandy and blurred, and he was stuck in a deep deep hole of quicksand and he was suffocating. For 2 weeks, that's all Tommy was able to do, for 2 weeks.
Until he got a text, the first social notification he had gotten for the entirety of the 2 weeks and it was from his brother. And that was all it took for him to break, he sobbed. He sobbed for so long he lost track, and after an unidentifiable amount of time he heard his phone ring. And even with his blurry vision and his hiccups he answered.
“Hey Tommy!” His brother's voice came through the phone, he let out a wet sob before he covered his mouth with his hand. He didn't know if it was a sob of relief from finally hearing his brother's voice after so long, or if it was the deep sadness that he had been keeping inside of him for far too long.
The rest of that night was spent on the phone, at some point the sobs died down and him and Wilbur just talked .
It was the best day Tommy had since summer ended.
Honestly? For him, almost any conversation they had had been a blur that he could only remember bits and pieces of. Meaning a week later when someone rang the doorbell, he had no fucking clue who it was. But being who he is, he decided to open it without checking.
And to say he was surprised when his brother, with his favorite red beanie and messy curly hair shoved under it, was on the other side of the door? An extreme understatement.
“W-wil?” Tommy honestly thought he could have been going crazy, but that didn't stop him from tearing up at the mere sight of his -possibly a hallucination- brother.
“Hey Toms” His brother, who was actually in front of him, said back. He also dropped his backpack off his shoulder and opened his arms for a hug which Tommy didn’t even hesitate to accept, and threw himself into his brother's arms, with tears he didn’t notice streaming down his face.
It was possibly the best hug Tommy has ever had.
After, he let Wilbur in, not leaving his side as he set his backpack down in his room. Apparently he was staying for the whole week, which Tommy was incredibly excited for. The 2 boys got distracted talking, but at some point Wilbur remembered there was more stuff in the rental car he got for the stay, and Tommy helped carry it inside. (In reality the only thing in the car was his guitar and he was fully capable of going by himself but Tommy didn’t want to be alone for any longer than he had to be.)
The 2 brothers spent the night together, Wilbur playing his songs to Tommy, who knew basically all the lyrics from constantly listening to them. And Tommy was just happy Wilbur was back, he didn't care if it was for a week or 3 hours he was so happy to have him there.
They both ended up falling asleep in Wilburs bed, and Tommy was happy .
He knew it wasn’t permanent, he would be foolish to hope for that. But what he did know was, for the first time in weeks, he was breathing sand free air. Because someone finally came and started pulling him out of the sand he thought he was so deeply stuck in. And with clean lungs he could smile and breath without the weight of it all eating away at him. Even his dreams were filled with smiles that night.
But then he woke up. He woke up to yelling, which he found odd. And when he looked around him he also realized Wilbur was no longer in bed, and the sun was just barely rising out the window.
Tommy didn’t even wake up this early for school, considering it started at 8 so there was absolutely no reason to, so why were people yelling at this hour. Distantly he realized the yelling was coming from inside his house, which didn't clue him in on absolutely anything. Until it did, and he realized that Wilbur must have run into Phil, who purposefully leaves for work before Tommy gets up. Though he didn’t hear the man come home last night so he must have just been grabbing something he forgot.
He forgets a lot, Kristin used to be the one to help him remember. But after she died there wasn't anyone, though he kind of pushed the only 2 people in his house who could away so in a way it was his fault. Doesn't matter either way, he's getting sidetracked, there's yelling, right. He should go check that out huh.
He walked downstairs, he turned the corner to the kitchen where the yelling was coming from, wincing slightly from the volume. Sure enough Phil was there, and so was Wilbur. They looked like they were fighting which matched the volume of the conversation for sure, being downstairs already he figured he might as well figure out what was going on, not like either of them noticed him yet anyway.
“I’m taking him! I don’t see why you have a problem with it, it's not like you're ever around anyway!”
“I have a problem with it because he's my son Wilbur!”
“Tommy stopped being the son the second you stopped talking to us for weeks on end! I can’t imagine that it's been any different since I left! But all of that doesn’t matter because the band is making enough to support us both and he needs to get out of this awful house!”
“You're wrong. He is my fucking son. And you can't just waltz in here after being gone and try and take him too!”
“I could say the same damn thing about you Phil!” A pause, “Look, it doesn’t matter what you think because it's not up to you. I just figured it would be nice to let you know.”
Wilbur.. wants to take Tommy with him? Tommy was stunned honestly, he didn't know what to think, but if Wilbur was actually going to ask that? Tommy wouldn’t be able to say no if somebody paid him. It’s not like he has anything left here anyway, without meaning to he blurted out an abrupt “yes.” Which in turn stopped all conversation and both men in the room turned to look at him.
“I mean like if you actually want that..” Tommy mumbled, nervous from the eyes on him and the silence.
Wilbur seemed to snap out of whatever daze he had been in and run up to Tommy, enveloping him in a big hug. “Of course I want that Toms oh my god.. I love you so much.”
Tommy smiled so bright the sun had competition. And with those words, he was hoisted the rest of the way out of the sand he had been stuck in for oh so long. Holding the hand of his favorite person as they guide him away from the quicksand he had been stuck in, never to return.
And they did exactly that, Phil was.. sad? Though Tommy didn’t really think it was fair for him to be, Tommy lost Phil a long time ago. But that didn’t matter, he packed a suitcase with some clothes and a backpack with anything else he may need for now. He did text Tubbo and Ranboo, even if they didn't give him a warning before leaving. It was probably a last ditch effort to see if they still cared, which for some reason they did seem upset. Tommy honestly didn’t know why, they haven't talked in over 2 weeks, it really wasn't that big of a deal. He felt a little bad, but not nearly enough to stay, nothing was enough to stay.
He was finally leaving, no more empty house, it was going to be him and Wilbur against the world. For real this time, Tommy would get to watch his shows from backstage, and listen to him sing whenever he wanted. He was excited to finally be out of the suffocating sand and the house so covered in it. He was leaving.
He would do online school for a while, Wilbur said if he wanted they could enroll him in public school. He decided when he finished freshman year (American school systems lolll sorry not sorry.) he would go back to public school. But honestly? For now he just wanted to spend every day with his brother and be happy.
So boarding a plane to a place thousands of miles away, holding his brother's hand, he had never been happier.
He still thinks about his mom, a lot actually. Ranboo texted him one more time after he had left, they said they missed Tommy, but said they knew it wasn't right to because they left him first.
Tommy just told them he forgave both of them. Because really he did, they found other people and that was okay.
Tommy learned piano after he left, it was something he had always wanted to learn. And Wilbur was more than happy to indulge him in this dream.
He met Wilbur's bandmates, he went to their shows, he helped with lyrics sometimes when Wilbur was especially stuck, and he was never alone. He was happy, he had people around him that would fight to make sure he never got stuck in the sand again. And he lived.